Hello! It's been a big long while. I want to write as many updates as I can right now in small summaries, in order to capture them to later revisit.
- I'm not dating the person I was in 2021. They stopped being nearly as supportive when we became long-distance and we finally broke up in 2023.
- I'm dating the person who I least expected to date, the one that was always there for me when my ex wasn't, and who was paradoxically the biggest supporter of our relationship.
- I'm in my senior year of college. I am majoring in Computer Science with a minor in Electrical Engineering. The years have flown by.
- I am in a good-enough position in my life, although I feel that as the years have gone by, I've become dumber. This is especially apparent to me after having read the feels posts
that I used to write. They were so eloquent before, and now I don't feel like the words are flowing nearly as easily, nor that I can be as philosophically and analytically inclined
about stuff as I used to be. Perhaps this is a good thing, though, and perhaps it is the reason I am more likeable now than I was 4 years ago. But perhaps I just killed some part of me
for the benefit of someone I shouldn't have cared about. I'm still young so it remains to be seen.
I am, however, a better person in just as many ways as I have stagnated. I have a stable, less long-distance relationship. Sometimes I yearn for more physical contact, even when we are
together, but I have learned to be more independent as a result of the distance. I have also learned to mitigate the symptoms of my BPD, including but not limited to the impulsiveness
that was once so pervasive in my personality. I think I have settled into a working formula for my life, and I am going to continue as it is for a good long while. Until change is
necessary again, of course.
It's good to be back. It's great to be back. It's a miracle how this community always catches me even after so many years; this time, I'm glad it's catching me when I'm not down.
<i>"Welcome home, tunas,"</i> I heard the SSH connection say as, for a brief moment, I fell back into the body of an 18 year-old that I once was. I was him, and he was me.
And for the record, I'd <b>still</b> date myself. Nothing's changed on that front, except now the relationship might be more stable if I did. I like my girlfriend a biiiiit better
than I do a hypothetical clone of me, though.
