I could take an opportunity and go to trade school, probably could get a job, but the pressure to go to college is intense and I can't bear conflict with my family.
I hate living as part of a family it's like a blood pact. A family can do their best but if a family member is vulnerable the rest of the family could always oppress them.
My friends are emotionally and intellectually unavailable. They stare vacantly at the slightest critical analysis and don't ever talk about their feelings, only funny.
I need to help them face reality but I don't know if I can do it.
All I can do is keep my head down. I can't do anything really.
I never feel like doing anything or going anywhere I just stay in my room all day.
There's always so much to do but it's barely anything. Everything's a chore.
Despite this all I have to keep going. I must press on. I just need to stop complying so goddamn much.
