So my two main machines aren't antiques by any means, but have some
interesting juxtaposition. There's also an aarch64 but I won't go
over it.

A late i386 2012 desktop: Intel D2500CC
Single core, 1.86GHz,
2x2GB DDR3 limited to 512M

it turns out I don't need to use bsd.sp to force a single core
there being only one.

An early i7 2011 laptop: XPS L502x
Quad core @ 2GHz, running bsd.sp.
8GB DDR3 RAM, limited to 512M.

So both over a decade old. High clock rates :-(.