26th January 2022 - Inane Meetings
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Written while listening to a radio show guest hosted by Ezra Furman.
One of the rubbish parts of being a Scout leader is meetings.
Unfortunately any organisation of people means meetings are
inevitable. UK Scout groups are arranged into districts with around 10
to 20 groups all within a specific geographical boundary. This means
you need meetings for the leaders within this district. They do not
happen often thankfully but they are certainly some of the most dull
and pointless I have. One advantage of the pandemic and shutdowns is
that we have discovered holding meetings virtually and so I can avoid
half an hour driving to some weird hut or community centre. However, I
am still stuck listening to people describing the activities they have
been up to and panicing about what I need to say. Some people go into
great depth about what they did for each week over a 3-6 month period.
Others, like myself, are brutally short unless they have done
something truely out of the ordinary. Then there is the awkward
discussion about what we want to do and who is organising. Awkward
silences when volunteers are asked for are common. We are all busy
people with lifes both inside and outside of Scouting. It does not
help that the person running the meeting has the charisma of a
disgraced pet rock. Then the meeting gets to any other business and
people suddenly don't want the meeting to end. They seem to think of
the most inane dross to discuss. Your hopes of escape remain a little
but soon diminish as Mr 'that week we did the 5th criteria for that
badge.. oh no wait it was actually the 6th criteria' boring chops
starts droning on about organising an orienteering competition again.
He has done this at each meeting for the last few years and no one
wants to help so it never gets anywhere. Yet he goes on and repeats
the same information. Then suddenly the noise stops and you hear
silence. Hopes rise again.... Ooooh was that a 'I will not take any
more of your time' comment from the meeting organiser? Yes it was!
Wait the couple who stare into the camera grumpily start asking daft
questions. Sigh. This meeting will never end. The mind checks out. The
monkeys start playing games. Occasionally the mind checks in to see if
your face has glazed over. Good, still look like I am vaguely
listening. Back to pondering about what you could of done with the
past 2 hours of your life but realise at best you would probably be
lurking on COM while listening to Anonradio. Then suddenly you hear a
good bye. Confused, you ponder if you misheard. Then you hear another
and it is actually over! Joy washes over and in all the excitement you
suddenly cannot use a computer and struggle to find the leave button.
Your face contorts and you try to keep the 'where is that bloody
button' in the head. Suddenly the faces go and you are free! Dazed,
confused but happy you stumble to the toilet and pee a sigh of relief.
Free at last! Well... until the next meeting that is.
