There is a great motivational speaker, tony robbins, who says to
  the audience "I have The Secret to getting anything you want in
  life and it comes down to one word. (Dramatic pause while
  audience talks amongst themselves) ASK." You have to ask the
  right question. Ask the right person. Ask at the right
  time/right place. Ask in the right way (tone of voice, body
  language...). And Ask Specifically. I would love to master this
  stuff, but at least I know how I'm supposed to do it. And I
  believe he's 100% right. "