I know. I know. I know. The whole "life narrative" bullshit. But
  you see, I have to DEAL WITH people who buy-into the whole
  crossroads narrative monomyth-subset crap and helping to
  understand the scripts they were taught and follow blindly helps
  me help them and gets them out of my face, because I'm the guy
  that fixes problems.   [and no, I'm not the guy that fixes
  problems. That's the script they keep handing me, so I play
  along]