Unfortunately, I am a victim of the language I was raised with.
  This lanuage, which we call English, or "murikan" lacks gender
  unspecific pronoun designations, forcing me to arbitrarily
  assign genders designations arbitrarily.

  I can only call upon the historical usage of said pronouns in
  which, at once time, the masculine gender identifier, which is
  "he" or "him" or "his", once long ago referred to all genders,
  specified and unspecified for it was believed that all humanity
  were a bunch of dicks, whether theirs were exposed or hidden due
  to a transdimensional error, where their peni were located in
  heaven, not suitable for our eyes here, yet carried with them in
  spiritual form nonetheless.