if you had to sit in front of an auditorium of 250 8 yr olds -

if you had to sit in front of an auditorium of 250 8 yr olds -
all being forced to stay quiet by nearby teachers, and you had
to give them, "[insert name here]*s Rules of Life", what would
you say?

[you can read off notes, no need for eye contact and any public
speaking anti-anxiety meds would fully be engaged, if
necessary].