I will truly be reluctant. I don't like politics. They'd shred
me to pieces, as I wouldn't be able to play the game properly.
But, if I was elected, I'd do my job, take lots of anti-anxiety
medication (I'd need it!) and find a doppleganger to make the
speeches for me so he gets shot instead of me. I'll hide out for
four years, making backroom deals that improve all of society
and fix everything, writing my memoirs as I go along, publish a
year after I leave office due to an engineered scandal that I
can tolerate, and then make millions off of TV appearances for
the rest of my life.