There's a book in the library I just got out called "Hello
  World! - Computer programming for kids and other beginners".
  It's a book about learning Python. This AI above?* Was written
  in Python. Learn Python, control the artificial intelligence and
  well... you know the rest.* :P Now if I just wasn't so lazy, I'd
  open the first page. ... [and yeah I don't worry about a
  computer stalking me; they'd see a guy sitting behind a computer
  - even an AI would yawn at those movements. First AI: "Oh look,
  he typed something, let's figure out what it is based on the
  movements of his fingers!" - Second AI says, "Oh, just READ WHAT
  HE TYPED DUMMY - IT'S IN ASCII!" First AI "Oh no, but I have to
  train my neural networks". Second AI: ::: turns its
  communications protocols off :::* [in human: ::: facepalm ::: ]