* I try to notice my emotions as they pass by internally. Been
practicing it since some silly biofeedback thing my mother
sent me to when I was 11 yrs old so I could learn
self-control, as I tended towards what she called getting
"inconsolable" at times.
Well, silly as it was, it worked. I'm 43 now. I had other
training; some during my religious phase in my late 20s (a
month at a monestary - I was super-obsessive convert to
Eastern Orthodox for 5 years).
Anyway, none of that at the moment.
Am I being dishonest? Well, here's the thing:
I have (core me).
I also have "apparent me".
I control parts of my apparent me, but most of my apparent
me comes from other people's expectations of me. So - if it
can, and it doesn't go against the (core me), I go along
with them. I make the path smooth.
I express the (core me) through the filters of other
people's expectations of me.
I can't control how they see me entirely, only a little. But
I don't mistake the apparent me for the (core me).
Authenticity for me is maintaining my (core me) throughout.
I express it as best I can, but I don't care if I'm
misrepresented by someone else, unless it is something (core
me) can't handle.
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[4]Kenneth Udut [5]Brian Naik I have mean thoughts. I also
let them pass by because my thoughts are not me. My feelings
aren't me.
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