When something was done right, always acknowledge it.
Words are best at first, later follow words with actions. At
some point in time, just an action like a gift or a hug will be
enough to acknowledge it. But ALWAYS acknowledge them, even the
littlest things.
When something is done wrong, use your judgement. Most people
occasionally want to know what they are doing wrong. But it is
usually best to keep your mouth shut, having an ''I want to be
honest with you for a second, if it's ok with you'' talk once in
a while.
At times, especially in a close relationship that hasn't had too
much communication, it's best talk out all of the negatives
while hugging.
When you want someone to do something for you, keep speech to a
minimum, once that person knows what's going on. Trust that the
person is capable of handling it without having it spelled out.
Written words are VERY good, as well as actions such as
snuggling close to a loved one when you want to be cuddled.
Establish that there is a basic understanding between each of
you -
that you are able to communicate in a fashion other than words.
1) Written words work the best.
The words sit there as a constant reminder. Try not to use
actual instructions unless truly needed. Trust that the job at
hand will be taken care of by some means. Lead it to the
person's own ingenuity to figure out the details.
2) Actions appropriate when there is a bond of some sort.
There are basic needs of every person. A hug is a basic thing
that EVERYONE needs and appreciates, no matter how much it
doesn't seem so. A few gentle words usually suffice if your
actions aren't clear.
3) Keep your spoken words gentle and positive.
Negativity is too much of an accepted thing. Start talking
positively and gently. You will get more done that way. Spread
some positive light into the world. We all need a little bit of
it.
