"The surface appears to be of some sort of permeable
material," the science officer says staring down at his
console.
"Can we beam down?" The captain says urgently.
"I don't know captain. We'll have to do some more tests,"
the science officer is hesitant.
"We don't have time." The captain's urgency intensifies.
"Our stock holders are about ready to sue us for taking
too much time on these surveys. Ensign Bolduer!" The
captain turns to a crewman standing stiffly behind his
chair. "Put together a down team. Get McGruder, Dower and
Dixon. Side arms and communication gear mandatory."
Ensign Bolduer acts quickly. The down team is assembled
in the away room and beams down immediately.
"Owe!" Ensign Dixon yells clinging to a long brightly
colored pipe.
"Sheet!" Dover groans straddling another colored pipe.
McGruder and Bolduer are balancing precariously, arms
flailing trying to keep their balance on yet two other
section of pipe seeming to run into infinity.
"Bolduer report!" The captain's voice comes from a
communicator device attached to Bolduer's belt. Bolduer
reaches for it and drops it. It bounces endlessly off
pipes seeming to go on forever until the sound finally
fades out.
"McGruder here." McGruder calls in, a little scared,
braced, sitting on one pipe with feet on another.
"Bolduer dropped his communicator. It appears captain,
we're sitting on an endless maze of pipes, all of the
same diameter, but of different colors, lengths and going
in different directions bent at ninety degree angles
randomly. We beamed to what we thought was the surface of
the planet but it's only the top layer of pipes. The
planet must be below us somewhere"
What do you make of it?" The captain says turning to the
science officer.
"They still seem to be growing on the far side of the
planet captain." The science officer's glare intensifies
at his console. "I've observed a single pipe on the other
side of the planet extending in length, turning randomly
at a rate of several hundred feet a minute. It also seems
to cap itself at random distances and then a new pipe is
started of a different color with each pipe beginning and
ending in the same type of bulb shape. All the pipes are
the same diameter. It appears captain that an ancient
race once lived here but died off and left a computer
running and the screen saver has mutated into reality."
"You mean this is all a computer fantasy?" The captain's
bark is serious.
"No captain," the science officer calmly replies.
"Somehow the old default Window's screen saver they were
using here, you know, the one with the randomly shaped
pipes that keeps extending in different colors, has
turned into reality here and it covers the whole planet,
sort of like a hermidiades sphere. It appears captain,
that a random virus infected a computer after this
civilization died out and kept developing algorithms
until the pipe screen saver mutated into physical
matter."
"Didn't that screen saver dissolve every few seconds and
start over," the captain observed.
"Yes captain and this planet is about to self destruct."
The science officer showed his first hint of concern.
"McGruder! Bolduer! This is the captain. Get out of
there, NOW!" The captain's order was for immediacy.
"We can't captain." McGruder's voice crackles over the
intercom. "Dixon got his tongue stuck to one of the
pipes."
Startdate whatever. The start ship escapes at warp nine,
just ahead of the blinding flash of the planet being
pulverized with a few pieces of pipe flying by at warp
ten.
