EDITOR'S NOTE: I kept the format the way it was to respect the author's creativity.
And because I'm a lazy bum. Toodles. -EBA
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| The Fourth Release: "You Can't Spell Luck." |
| by |
| gir the iNTELLIGENT dANCE mONSTER |
+---------------------------------------------+
Are you sure that meteor is going to be worth
anything once your filthy human hands touch
it? When was the last time you washed your
hands anyways? Do you even wash your hands?
HOW MANY HANDS DO YOU HAVE! Can I borrow one
of them hands of yours if you aren't using
it? WHAT'S THAT HAND DOING IN MY POPCORN
BOWL?
Don't be afraid. It's the more friendlier of
the two.
Does it use the Internet?
What?
That hand of yours, does it use the Internet?
Ah nah, I am pretty proficient at typing with
just one hand now. This one hardly ever
clocks any Internet hours anymore.
Oh yeah? Just how long has it been?
I... I don't know.
THINK! You must remember! It's important.
Ok, OK! I think, umm the last time I can
remember that hand using the Internet was
when Stan Gable and Leslie Nielsen were on
the tv together.
These nerds, do they really travel in packs
like you say?
I know it's hard to believe detective, but
I've been a witness to it myself many a
time.
That's a frightening thought. What's this
about them getting wet. Do they multiply
or something?
No. THANK GOD! But they do get upset.
VERY VERY upset. It's not a pretty sight
when a nerd gets wet.
And the local authorities have done all
they can?
Honestly, I can't remember the last time
any of the local authorities were run by non
nerds.
MY GOD! What has happened to this poor
defenseless college town of yours? What
about the cheerleaders man, are they safe?
Sadly, they too have been claimed by the
nerds. They flock to a man who knows his
binary mathematics.
Dude, I don't think Stan Gable would say
that. He doesn't like nerds.
Nah Man. He's totally trying to dupe the
detective into thinking he's the victim.
All of this stuff, he is making it up. The
nerds don't got shit in this world.
But I'm saying, Nielsen is a nerd right?
He's funny though.
And funny nerds are ok?
I think so. Especially if they are funny
looking. Many funny LOOKING nerds are the
best in my opinion.
Word.
Word.
Wait.
What?
Funny looking nerds aren't the best nerd.
They are just after the lowest common
public or something.
Lowest common denominator.
Yeah, that. See it doesn't take much for
someone to laugh at the fact that a person
looks different from them or funny. Besides
that is no talent, how you look. People are
born and get stuck with that shit. What I
am saying is that those people who learn to
make others laugh, they got a skill. Sure
they can look funny but it's not the same as
when they drop a joke bomb in your lap and it
explodes. Then everybody be cracking up and
shit.
Are you trying to be funny?
Nah.
Word.
Are you saying I look funny?
Yeah. Huh? Word, yeah you do look kinda
funny. It's like my glasses see funny and
looking at your their radar circuits are way
overloaded. THE COLORS ARE MAKING WEIRD
NOISES JUST TRYING TO THINK ABOUT IT! LOOK
AWAY!
What? You're just trying to get me to look
away so you can steal another handful of my
popcorn. Like I said man, keep that hand
out of my fucking bowl.
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| [||||||| ] Rating: MENTAL |
| |
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+~-_=[ BLAZED / CounterCulture TextFiles ]=_-~+
| Copyright (C) 2003 Kids On Bridges |
| angstmonster.org/txt/kob/blazed/ |
+---------------------------------------------+
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