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=   F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K.   =
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                          Just Myself
                          -----------

       I think I will go back to being anti-social since it hasn't
got me very far. After time I start seeing the true personalities of
people too quickly and a lot of them make me want to throw up. So many
people I have made friends with but decided to stop talking too
because they just want to use me or they are sweet on the outside but
rotten on the inside. I don't understand what directs me to all the
mean people on this earth, all the people with the huge egos and small
conscious'. I rarely share anything about myself anymore because a lot
of people would exploit it for their personal use, I don't know
exactly how but I know it would happen, which makes this writing weird
to me, perhaps after so many years of schooling they finally managed
to pound the habit of sharing into me.
       Everybody I see seems to have a little bit of me inside them,
whether it is the way they walk or a personality trait, perhaps I am
just as sick as everybody else but am too ignorant to see it. Maybe I
could solve all this if I could finally find someone who I knew
_really_ cared, the only time I hear the words you are really good at
something is usually from people who don't know anything about it, and
rarely from the people who I respect and idolize which makes me sad,
not being good at anything. Well I guess I should just congratulate
myself for trying to be so great without jumping into the bandwagon
which I try so hard to avoid, probably to prove to myself that I am an
individual and not just part of the crowd.
       I hope someone else who feels the same sees this so they know
they aren't alone, and those who feel different will know there are
people like this out there in the world where a simple "hello" means a
lot.

       Orbie - glambert at mindspring dot com

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