subj: tragedy holding on to hope
-----------------------------------------------------
In the face of tragedy at the point when you don't know what to
do, you must hold on to hope. Hope is a strange thing. Its
exploitable. It must be an emotion. People see this and know the
people are desperate and will do anything that looks like the
destination that hope points to, such as good fortune, or better
outcome.
As I research more about my sisters behavior the circumstances
that lead to her predicament, I latch on to hope. That is she
will get through this and have a better life. She wont fall down
that hole we've worked so hard to get somewhat out of.
Her behavior is like a football player who has had too many
concussions. She is angry and has behavioral outbursts. These
behaviors have never been my sister. Some of her behavior makes
no sense to others for the interactions she is having. Under
normal conditions people would not be so agitated nor would they
perceived slight's from others.
I "hope" whatever is happening to her brain is temporary.
I've tried calling the hospital, but no answers in her room. I
contemplate if I have a conversation with her, will my voice
exacerbate her negative feelings about where she is and why she
is there.
