I shouldn't have shouted like that.
- [email protected]

So the  other day I was  out back of the  house at
the end of  Tax Rd, because I got  my crocus patch
there  and they  all came  up this  week!  So  I'm
there admiring it all in  the spring sun, when the
rumbles come.   And I'm like, no,  not now...  But
then  as sure  as you  know, a  pretty good  sized
crawler bursts out of the  ground there - right in
the middle of  my garden.  And it  just sits there
squashing my  dug-up flowers, wiggling  its stupid
purple tentacles  at me and blinking  all its eyes
here and there, like christmas lights.

And you  know I'm feeling pretty  angry there, and
I'm like, god DAMN it, NO!  Just no!  Get the HELL
out of here!  NOW!

And  the thing  sort of  slumps, and  slowly sulks
off.   And  its  eye  stalks get  all  droopy  and
downcast-like.      And     it's    doing     that
whine-blubbering  sound like  they make  when they
get sad.

So I go walking after  it, and I'm all like, okay,
I'm  sorry.   I was  feeling  angry  there, but  I
shouldn't have  shouted at you like  that, I know.
That was unkind of me.

A few of the eye  stalks twist towards me and look
forlornly.   And then  it  happened.   One of  its
sphincters pulls  in and  splurts out its  goo all
over my  pants and  shoes.  And the  thing gurgles
and laughs, and tears  back into the ground again.
And I'm just like, why do I even bother?

Then I go back into the house to take off my shoes
and pants.  Because that stuff'll eat even through
leather in 5 minutes, easy.

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