93 - Saw a piece of my truck.
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The other day I was watching the dwarfs again,
working away in their hot-rod shop. They've made
some goofy new creation out of a pickup truck.
It's not painted yet, and so I notice it's my old
green F250! I can tell from the dents by the fuel
cap. I wonder how many times that thing's been
wrecked and re-made since last I saw it back in
the winter. Now they got some kind of mid-engine
layout going, with the body of a Smart FourTwo in
front and the bed of my truck behind. Big mud
tires all around, and chrome bumpers welded at
angles onto the sides of it all. Looks like a
giant grasshopper.
I remember back some years when I got that
truck. Beth and the kids and I were living in an
apartment in a rickety old walk-up building, and
it was rough times. I'll never forget the hot
murderous rage our neighbors would lay into us
with. I know little kids are noisy, and little
kids with developmental problems can be even more
so, but we were doing the best we could. We were
scared, but we couldn't find anyplace else to
live.
That's when I got this idea to borrow some money
from my dad, and buy this old truck and camper
combo. We'd put the kids into it as soon as they
woke up in the morning, and we'd drive off. Park
it someplace there was a playground, have some
breakfast. Then maybe Beth or I would go off to a
job, and the other would spend the day with the
Evan and Tara in the park. They'd have the camper
to come back to for naps, for toilet, for food, or
just a rest. It's weird how much better
everybody's emotional regulation can be, when
you're mostly outside. And we'd all meet there
together again at the end of the day for supper,
and get ready for bed. Drive back to the
apartment after the kids fall asleep, and carry
them inside. And that's how we'd live every day
for some months, just to stay away from our
neighbors. I actually thought the camper life
worked pretty good for us, although I think I was
probably more into it than Beth was.
Anyways, eventually we found these town-homes
here, and settled down. But we hadn't been here
more than two months before the AVs finally
tracked Beth down. And it wasn't two more months
after that, when the kids and I happened upon the
ogre's lair while walking up in the hills
behind. And well, ever since that day I've been
here all on my own.
Maybe that's why it's something to see that piece
of my truck. All changed and carved up as it is,
after everything what's happened as time's gone
by. Aren't we all.
