Go ahead, I know, you can't resist asking: "Who is Francesco Zappa?"
Francesco Zappa was a musician from Milan who lived near the end of
the 18th century. No one has bothered to remember when he was born,
only that he flourished between 1763 and 1788.[1]
While Francesco 'flourished', Europe was ablaze with new inventions
like the steam engine, powdered wigs and Mozart. Although no
practical uses were ever found for this stuff, it didn't stop them
from being used to make someone a lot of money.
Francesco had to make a living too. He was a talented guy who could
play the violoncello. Even back in those days people knew that what
you had between your legs made a big difference, and so Francesco
found honest employment sawing away while noblemen ate dinner. It
wasn't such a bad job if you remembered every fifteen minutes to
remind the nobleman what a wonderfully perfect human being he was,
stressing the intense personal privilege you felt by coming to his
digestive assistance. He might even remember to pay you.
If you needed to pry a little extra out of the old boy, you could
always try composition. Just dash off a few easy new pieces, write
the nobleman's name in BIG letters on the score, and then play them
when you knew his highness had plenty of cash on hand. Francesco
dedicated his very first work (a set of six trio sonatas) to a
Sicilian Count Catanti. Our hero never forgot the Count even after
leaving Italy for London (then the very center of the civilized
English world).
He took those same six little trios, RE-dedicated them to some
unsuspecting Englishmen (no doubt collecting a second big tip), and
then found a publisher for them. Why not find someone else to
dedicate a few more trios to? Get them published, and then . . .
what about a recording contract?
While Francesco waited for his next royalty check, he thought it
prudent to find a steady job. Soon he was employed as Master of
Music for none other than the Duke of York. Besides playing during
the Duke's feedings, Francesco spent time instructing the Duke's
family on the attainment of musical rapture. Not a bad life, all in
all.
This position naturally gave Francesco a certain amount of 18th
century name recognition. With his music advertised as far away as
the American colonies, he found opportunities to tour Europe. A trip
to Germany with his 'cello even produced good reviews. "Francesco
Zappa . . . charmed his audience by his beautiful tone and
delivery."[2] Whether Francesco was actually the first performer
to attract attention by using a woman's stage name will have to be
left to future historians to decide.
It might have been about that time that Francesco began to call
himself Francois. "Francois" Zappa eventually settled in The Hague
while there was still enough room there for him to play his 'cello.
Using his international reputation, he probably had no difficulty
impressing the local musicians and finding some sweet, young
students. It is here, living peacefully in Holland, that History
last recorded Francesco Zappa, classical musician.
Like his birthdate, Francesco's date of death has never been
reported. Rumors that he travelled to America in a small boat using
his 'cello as paddle, or that he made a fortune in London by
designing the first steam powered gin-and-tonic maker certainly seem
apocryphal.
Throughout the 19th and 20th centuries mankind continued to develop
new uses for Mozart, so there was less need for a composer like poor
Francesco. Gradually his music found its own level in dusty
libraries, indexed in large dusty catalogues devoted to dusty dinner
music. A listing in an encyclopedia here, a music dictionary there;
that was about all the P-R Francesco Zappa got for many centuries.
"BUT WAIT!!", I hear you ask, "wasn't here supposed to be a record
contract?"
That's right, I did say something about that. Since 18th-century
record companies were plagued with immense technical problems,
Francesco's debut album had to be postponed until all the bugs in
the steam phonograph were eliminated. Once coal burning cassettes
came into vogue, however, the project was completely forgotten.
Then, back in 1984, a very interesting thing happened. That's when
Frank Zappa formed THE BARKING PUMPKIN DIGITAL GRATIFICATION
CONSORT, the first musical ensemble dedicated to the preservation of
early 21st century performance practices.
As the director of the BPDGC, Frank knew the real value of
unfulfilled 18th century recording contracts, and he realized the
appropriateness of recording Francesco Zappa. After rescuing the the
music from those dusty libraries[3], and arranging it for the
instrumental resources of the Consort, the Consort recorded it in
their favorite hall, the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen.
There you have it. After all this time: FRANCESCO ZAPPA'S DEBUT
ALBUM. You can enjoy it with dinner, or just listen along the next
time you feel the urge to wear a powdered wig.
Included on this record are all the trios that Francesco dedicated
to Count Catanti and to that unsuspecting Englishman, plus a few
from a later set that he dedicated to a certain "Prince Charles."
Any more questions? How about "What's next for the BARKING PUMPKIN
DIGITAL GRATIFICATION CONSORT?"
Well, that's hard to say. The Consort has already recorded some of
Frank Zappa's own music[4], and there seems to be plenty of other
Zappas waiting for their chance. There's Domenico Zappa, the 16th
century Viennese Zink player, or Father Simeone Zappa, the Bolognese
musical theorist of the same century[5], or Guido Zappa, the
mathematician, or Paolo Zappa, the author of a book on leprosy
("UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!"), or Anita Zappa, the poet. Maybe we'll even
find a way of liberating some of Francesco Zappa's symphonies from
the really dusty libraries in Europe. But don't worry, we'll do
something.
David Ocker
Assistant Director
BARKING PUMPKIN DIGITAL GRATIFICATION CONSORT
footnotes
1. Guido Salvetti, THE NEW GROVE DICTIONARY OF MUSIC & MUSICIANS,
Stanley Sadie, ec., Washington D.C., MacMillan, 1980, vol. 20, p644.
2. Edmund S.J. van de Straeten, HISTORY OF THE VIOLONCELLO, London,
William Reeves, 1915, p169.
3. The music on this record was stored for a very long time at the
Bancroft Library of the University of California, Berkeley, and at
the Library of Congress, Washington D.C. Special thanks to Jim Lee,
who used RISM to point us in the right direction, and to Gillian
Anderson & Carol Armbruster at the Library of Congress.
4. THE PERFECT STRANGER, Boulez Conducts Zappa, Angel Records, 1984.
5. Rob. Eitner, QUELLEN-LEXICON der MUSIKER and MUSIKGELEHRTEN, New
York, Musurgia, 1898.
