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Cheers and Jeers: Wednesday [1]

['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']

Date: 2025-05-21

#45 is very Upset With #47

The Daily Show strikes again, revealing the primordial, impermanent mush that is the alleged brain of this guy. On the left: the guy from 2016 who hates people who accept money and gifts from Middle Eastern countries. On the right: the soulless grifter doing it right now.

x Trump is taking money from the Middle East and 2016 Trump is PISSED — The Daily Show (@thedailyshow.com) 2025-05-16T17:58:39.487Z

What are we going to tell the children?

And now, our feature presentation...

Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, May 21, 2025

Note: Surprising absolutely no one, this note just won Best Note at the Cannes Note Festival. The standing ovation lasted 20 minutes. On to the Oscars!

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By the Numbers:

3 days!!!

Days 'til summer: 30

Days 'til the Caribbean Wine & Music Festival in Mt. Airy, Maryland: 3

Percent chance that a federal judge ruled Monday that the DOGE takeover of the U.S. Institute of Peace was illegal, and that efforts to dismantle it and sell off its headquarters are "null and void": 100%

Percent by which the number of health care workers in Maine who identify as non-white has risen in the past decade: 143%

Number of babies born in 2024, up from 3.59 million in 2023: 3.61 million

Amount of our tax dollars the Trump administration is giving to the family of traitor-to-her-country Ashli Babbitt, who was shot and killed by Capitol police in self-defense as she was trying to break down the doors to the Speaker's Lobby on January 6, 2021: $5 million

Age of dependable character actor Joe Don Baker when he died last week: 89

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Mid-week Rapture Index: 182 (including 3 false Christs and 1 Happy Rapture Party Day). Soul Protection Factor 16 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.

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Puppy Pic of the Day: Gold star goes this morning to Kannan Animal Welfare…

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CHEERS to making the world safe from creepy crawly critters. And by creepy crawly critters I of course mean viruses and the anti-vaxxers, anti-maskers, and other assorted dimwits who think fighting them with science is Worse Than CommunismTM. As our sorry-ass nation retreats from the rest of the world (Greenland, Canada, the Panama Canal, the Gulf of America, and all the Arab Nations' money excepted), the rest of the gang is stepping up to give our next outbreak a softer landing:

The World Health Organization's member countries on Tuesday approved an agreement to better prevent, prepare for and respond to future pandemics in the wake of the devastation wrought by the coronavirus. The U.S., meanwhile, will stop future Covid outbreaks by posting one of these signs in every state. Sustained applause echoed in a Geneva hall hosting the WHO’s annual assembly as the measure—debated and devised over three years—passed without opposition. The treaty guarantees that countries which share virus samples will receive tests, medicines and vaccines. Up to 20% of such products would be given to the WHO to ensure poorer countries have some access to them when the next pandemic hits. WHO Director-General Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus touted the agreement as “historic” and a sign of multilateralism at a time when many countries are putting national interests ahead of shared values and cooperation.

In addition to the provisions above, the agreement also calls for thorough testing of a new system that will contain the spread of pandemic disinformation by hucksters looking to make a fast buck amid the chaos. We hear it's a two-step process: 1) apply duct tape to mouth, and 2) pull catapult lever.

CHEERS to Bill in Portland Maine: Mr. Explainer Man. You may have heard that the Senate advanced a bill to regulate the crypto industry. So here's the thing about crypto: nobody knows what the hell crypto is except the "crypto bros." I'm here to change that. After effectively infiltrating Crypto Bro World (many people died getting the secret password to me), I'm now an expert at doing crypto stuff. It's actually easier than you might think. Here's what you need to do to do a crypto transaction:

First you push a button on your computer. Then hold that button down while pushing another button. Click "Tab" until a large translucent portal opens up in the middle of your screen. BE NOT AFRAID!!! YOU’RE DOING GREAT!!! Using a pair of solar-eclipse glasses, peer into the portal until you see a crypto bro waving at you while holding a burlap sack. Take the maximum allowable withdrawal you can from ATMs within a five-mile radius and, having stacked it neatly, place the cash—plus any jewelry or other valuables you might have around the house (Hummel figurines must be secured in bubble wrap)—into the burlap sack. The crypto bro will nod. The portal will disappear. You may remove your eclipse glasses. And just like that… CONGRATULATIONS!!! ...you have just done a crypto transaction. Welcome to the middle of the third decade of the 21st century.

Please disseminate this far and wide. The people must know.

CHEERS to jump-starting the jalopy. 124 years ago this week, the first auto repair shop opened in Boston. Followed soon after by the first auto repair bill-induced cardiac arrhythmia.

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BRIEF SANITY BREAK

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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK

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CHEERS to partying parties. On May 21, 1832, the first Democratic National Convention got under way in Baltimore. The top issues were Andrew Jackson's contempt for the Second Bank of the United States and the business of voting on a running mate. (Martin Van Buren got the nod in a blowout.) And there was this curious factoid:

[T]he Summary of the Proceedings notes that a delegation was sent to ask Charles Carroll of Carrollton to attend. At that moment in time, he was the last surviving signer of the Declaration of Independence. Carroll declined, citing ill health. (He died later that year.)

Jackson and Van Buren went on to crush Henry Clay and John Sergeant in the general, due mostly to their campaign slogan: "Don't Make Andrew Mad. You Don't Want to See Andrew When He's Mad."

CHEERS to today's edition of Give Those Genius Experts A Raise! Today's edition courtesy of this headline in Maine's largest newspaper The Portland Press Herald:

Proper firearm storage saves lives, experts say

This has been today's edition of Give Those Genius Experts A Raise!

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Ten years ago in C&J: May 21, 2015

CHEERS to a hawk coming home to roost. Hey! Who's ready for Secretary of Defense John McCain and National Security Adviser Joe Lieberman? It's a possibility now that U.S. Senator and Southern Colonel Lindsey Graham—John and Joe's BFF—says he plans to announce his presidential run while sipping lemonade and fanning himself under his favorite magnolia tree in Bloodhound Hollow, South Carolina on June 1. His reason for wanting to set up a bachelor pad (complete with four-poster and satin canopy) at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue? According to the media, Graham says he's running because ”the world is falling apart.” In light of what he would actually do as president, his official campaign slogan will add the words: "too slowly."

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And just one more…

CHEERS to top hats and tails at dawn. Why didn’t anyone tell me there was a new Emmy-nominatable Randy Rainbow production? Why? WHY?!! DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING AROUND HERE?!! Ahem. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm happy to announce that there's a new Randy Rainbow video available for your enjoyment. It sums up the current political environment nicely, and by golly you can dance to it...

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Oh, forgot to mention: it has a cuss word in it. Hope you didn’t crank it up to 11 from your desk at work.

Have a happy Groundhog Day again again. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?

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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial You can say this for “Cheers and Jeers”: More than 20 years in, it’s still worth arguing about. —USA Today

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