(C) Daily Kos
This story was originally published by Daily Kos and is unaltered.
. . . . . . . . . .
Today's top Trump Fake News [1]
['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']
Date: 2025-04-09
When your president goes by the name “Donald Trump,” it can be hard to tell what’s real or fake. Complicating matters, Trump himself is a bona fide phony.
A leading scientist from Triple Action University has determined that Trump is at least 97.3% fake. That scientist now lives in a 6-by-8 cell in El Salvador.
Yes, in today’s confusing post-truth, post-hypocrisy, post-satire world, truth is in the eye of the beholder. The following breaking fake news items are anywhere from 1 to 100 percent true … and/or false.
# # #
The Supreme Court today voted 5–4 to vote 5–4 on whatever Trump tells them to vote 5–4 on.
At 3 am this morning on Truth Social, someone who may or not be Trump posted: “Sleepy Joe Biden has been detained for thinking bad thoughts about Trump and will soon be deported to Belize.”
WTF America?! has just learned that President [REDACTED] accidentally shared the nation’s nuclear codes during a Signal group chat with North Korea, Russia and an Iranian terror cell called the Balsamic Brotherhood of Asshat Jumanji.
Trump has just signed an executive order banning anti-Trump protests held by zero or more people.
In related fake news: Trump has ordered Elon Musk to DOGE the First Amendment.
Triple Action News is reporting that Trump plans to place elevendy-seven percent tariffs on all imports from the moon. Lunar officials could not be reached for comment.
Asked for a comment about people losing their shirts in the Trump Stock Market Death Plunge ® , Trump invited them to buy new shirts from his official merch store.
Trump has ordered all Border Patrol agents to wear official Trump T-shirts under their uniforms.
Trump shirts purchased from Amazon will now be docked with a 50 percent tariff, payable to Trump.
The National Endowment for the Humanities is now slated to be fully dehumanitized.
Trump has appointed himself host of the 98th Academy Awards in Hollywood, where he will award himself a lifetime achievement award to add to his collection of Golden Statues.
The alphabet is being downsized from 26 letters to 23, for a savings of 11.5 percent.
McDonald’s Corporation has named Trump its “McDonald of the Century.”
Trump will be taking his annual physical Friday at Walter Reed Medical Center, where Doc Ronny will pronounce him the least demented person who has ever lived — or else.
See more of my dystrumpian satire at WTF America?!
[END]
---
[1] Url:
https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2025/4/9/2315482/-Today-in-Trump-Fake-News?pm_campaign=front_page&pm_source=more_community&pm_medium=web
Published and (C) by Daily Kos
Content appears here under this condition or license: Site content may be used for any purpose without permission unless otherwise specified.
via Magical.Fish Gopher News Feeds:
gopher://magical.fish/1/feeds/news/dailykos/
