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Cheers and Jeers: Wednesday [1]
['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']
Date: 2025-03-12
“The greatest threat to democracy worldwide...”
The words of MAGA cultists speaking on Fox News about George Soros, each and every word as false as they could be. But when spoken about Elon Musk, they suddenly turn 100 percent accurate. The Daily Show orchestrates the switcheroo at which they are so good...
x Conservatives warning about George Soros but make the footage Elon Musk — The Daily Show (@thedailyshow.com) 2025-03-11T15:09:48.541Z
In the immortal words of that famous left-wing Biden oligarch Spock: “fascinating.”
And now, our feature presentation...
Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, March 12, 2025
Note: [Removed by DOGE for containing nice words.]
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By the Numbers:
10 days!!!
Days 'til spring: 8
Days 'til Maine Maple Sunday at sugarhouses around the state: 10
Approval rating among Ukrainians for President Zelensky in, respectively, February and March (after Trump's Oval Office ambush), according to the Kyiv Institute of Sociology: 57%, 68%
Percent chance that last weekend's wildfires on Long Island were caused by some guy making S'mores, according to police: 100%
Acres of wildland burned in the fire: 600
Percent surcharge Ontario is putting on electricity sent to the U.S.: 25%
Speed at which auto airbags inflate: 200mph
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 180 (including 5 volcanoes and several choking hazards for Easter). Soul Protection Factor 12 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: In Cherry Hill, New Jersey…Saved!!!
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JEERS to living up to my lowest expectations. Goddammit it. I thought there was no freaking way Speaker Mike Johnson would circle his MAGA waggoneers effectively enough to pass the budget bill yesterday, so I wrote a Pulitzer winning paragraph about it. Unfortunately, their heads are now so full of relatives of RFK Jr.’s brain worm that they actually bumbled into it. (With a lousy and unnecessary assist from a single Democrat—Jared Golden from the Embarrassed State of Maine.) So now the bill, which isn’t a clean “continuing resolution” but a Republican jury-rigged erosion of domestic programs in favor of more boom-booms for the Pentagon, goes to the Senate. Will Chuck Schumer’s Democrats find the will to deny MAGAs the 60 votes they need to invoke cloture? Or will they help score a win for Donald Trump and his New Nazi Party and then trot out an all-you-can-eat buffet of lame excuses? I think I’ll look on the brightest side possible—that way my vision will be so impaired I won’t be able to read the obvious answer. Oh well, at least I’ve heard we’re all getting a free armband out of it.
CHEERS to collaring a clod. Finally. Finally!!! To the delight of justice seekers throughout the country, the president was finally arrested this week. I don’t need to tell you what a creep he is. A conniving, murderous, adulterous thug in his late 70s who left his conscience in his mother's womb. Foul-mouthed leader of cultists who hang on his every utterance, including the rape jokes. Loves those photo ops with Putin, too. And, boy, do I wish I was talking about our president:
Former Philippines President Rodrigo Duterte was detained on Tuesday under an International Criminal Court arrest warrant, which accused him of crimes against humanity in connection with the brutal "war on drugs" he led while in office, the Philippines Presidential Communications Office said. … More than 12,000 people were thought to have been killed, according to Human Rights Watch.
Great. Now do our guy. I'd list his crimes here but I'm afraid I'd drain the internet of all its pixels.
CHEERS and JEERS to Daylight Saving Time, day 3. Lovin' it because it's still sunny at 6pm. Hatin' it because it's dark at wake-up time again, so I get paranoid about oversleeping and this becomes my sleep cycle:
Zzzzzz… [Jolt awake! Check the time] …Zzzzzz… [Jolt awake! Check the time] …Zzzzzz… [Jolt awake! Check the time] …Zzzzzz… [Jolt awake! Check the time]
It's like being an audience member at a JD Vance speech.
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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CHEERS to today's edition of You Actually Thought Trump Was Going To Be Better On IVF Than Kamala Harris? You Clueless, Clueless CLUELESS Person!!! Courtesy of CNN:
Ryleigh Cooper said she voted for Trump in November because he promised to make in vitro fertilization available for free. Cooper said doctors had told her IVF might be her only option for conceiving a child. “Going into the voting booth, the main thing on my mind was … I want to be a mom,” Cooper told CNN’s Laura Coates. Last month, Cooper was laid off from her job at the US Forest Service. She told Coates she now regrets supporting Trump.
This has been today's edition of You Actually Thought Trump Was Going To Be Better On IVF Than Kamala Harris? You Clueless, Clueless CLUELESS Person!!!
JEERS to chaos in Canuckistan. With DOGE, Israel-Gaza, and the Ukraine situation sucking up most of the oxygen on the planet recently, you may have missed the hot stone-on-stone action on the cold, hard ice in Calgary, Alberta. Canadian curler Rachel Homan won the prestigious Scotties Tournament of Hearts championship again (her fifth title), and her home province of Ontario went absolutely berserk. Being Canada and all, the celebrating was, as usual, virtually indistinguishable from out-of-control rioting, as demonstrated here in this video archived at the Canadian National Naughty Boys Bureau. WARNING: this is not at all suitable for children or people with sensitivities to graphic scenes of destruction:
x Rioting begins in Winnipeg this morning because sports. pic.twitter.com/BJhG4f7P6b — Colin Lougheed (@Colin_Lougheed) March 26, 2018
I blame the Molson.
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Ten years ago in C&J: March 12, 2015
CHEERS to Senator Lindsey Graham. Yes, the blind squirrel who gets the vapors anytime an ISIS video says "Boo!" has found a nut. He was in Iowa over the weekend at the ethanol-worshipping summit, when apparently the subject of immigration reform came up. Graham, who voted for the immigration bill that John Boehner refused to bring to the floor, actually said something pithy:
“Strom Thurmond had four kids after he was 67. If you’re not willing to do that, then we need immigration."
Why, I may have to bring him a glass of fresh lemonade next time I see him settin' for a spell under the magnolia tree.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to 30 days of tummy growlies. The Islamic holy month of Ramadan started Sunday night, and we’d like to give a C&J shoutout to all of our Muslim readers around the world, of which we have millions. According to the mighty Wikipedia, “This annual observance is regarded as one of the Five Pillars of Islam. The month lasts 29–30 days based on the visual sightings of the crescent moon, according to numerous biographical accounts compiled in the hadiths.” It’s also a month of dawn-to-dusk fasting. Here’s our annual glimpse into what that looks like for American Muslims, courtesy of Buzzfeed…
x YouTube Video
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The previous Democratic President of the United States celebrated by actually wishing those who celebrate Ramadan a Happy Ramadan! Unlike the current Republican president, who won’t do that, and will end up surprised when he finds out his afterlife consists of 72 virgins beating them for eternity with bottles of spray-on tan.
Have a happy humpday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial "Cheers and Jeers is really fun, and the kiddie pool is incredible. —Chase Sui
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[END]
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