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Top Comments: Individuality vs Individualism Edition [1]
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Date: 2025-03-10
Despite Sunday being the horrible We Lost An Hour that it was, I managed to get myself up and get to church (Unitarian Universalist, for those that like to know the denomination :)). I really adore our current minister and she’s only with us through June, so I don’t want to miss a chance to hear her preach! Turns out it was a fantastic service, but I don’t usually run home and go “I gotta use this for my diary tomorrow!” A portion of this one, however, made a connection from that audience to here for me, and I asked our minister Rev. Laura Solomon if I could quote part of her sermon in my diary tonite. She said yes- I’ll link to the Youtube of the service so you can hear it yourself, if you’re so inclined (sermon starts at minute 53). The service was themed around the shared responsibility, ownership and belonging that makes up being in community. Specifically our church community, but that’s not what I’m bringing here tonight.
In her sermon, Rev. Laura referenced an essay by Rev. Fred Muir, saying:
In this essay, Rev. Muir calls for a reimagining of church from a place focused on individual needs to a space that transcends individual needs and nurtures a sense of
belonging, care, and collective responsibility.
After reminding us our denomination values individuality, she gave us a history lesson in how we ended up morphing into individualism:
We went from individuality - the celebration of what makes a person unique, the thing that distinguishes a person or a group from another…to individualism - the principle of being independent and self-reliant. And these are not the same thing.
And then she shared this, which made me think of our current state of affairs:
Individuality in community is asserting your thoughts, speaking your mind, sharing your truth, even if it is different from those around you. Individuality looks like being the lone dissenting voice in a meeting. Individualism is thinking your lone dissenting voice is the only correct one. Individualism is not being able to find a middle way, not engaging in the relationality required of beloved community, because you know what is best for you (and therefore for others). Individuality looks like remembering that every person around you in this beloved community is also an individual and deserves to share their thoughts, even when they are different from yours. Even when they are different from the majority. Individualism feeds our belief that we are exceptional - we as Unitarian Universalists, we as Americans, we as individuals.
Tell me that isn’t the essence of the difference between liberals and conservatives. Because I spent a lot of Sunday ruminating on this. My religious core demands I acknowledge that my view may not… IS NOT the only view. It also means that while I may understand others may hold views very different than my own, to be in community we must ALL respect that individuality of belief. No one’s belief is the True One.
My political core ALSO demands I recognize people are individuals. We don’t hold the same beliefs, but I align myself with those others who also believe in individuality.
Religious and political conservatives believe they know the One True Way to either God or lower egg prices, or something like that. And knowing that Way, they believe it’s incumbent on them to make sure EVERYONE ELSE comes around to that way of thinking. There is no compromise, no middle ground. There’s their way, or their scorn/discrimination/abuse. They KNOW there are “only two sexes” and thus cannot make room for the beautiful diversity of humanity that is cis, trans, nonbinary, gay, straight, asexual, bi, pan, etc. They KNOW white men are on top, and thus Black men and white women are removed from their well-deserved military posts so lesser white men can sit in those seats. Etc.
It’s why I worry our Democratic big tent seems to be narrowing. Our incredible individuality is our strength, not closing our tent flaps and looking more like the Republican big top. I don’t know how we market that to an American voting population that doesn’t seem to understand their best future lies with individuality not conforming to a narrow ‘norm’. But I know that we need to keep trying.
I hope your week is starting off well… after Simba’s last vet visit, I was hopeful this one would go well and it exceeded my expectations. He had all his pre-meds (meaning I was up an hour earlier than normal on a morning that already was messed up!!), and I took a bag full of cut-up mozzarella sticks feeding nonstop while they felt him over and managed to get two (!!!) vaccinations in. That would not have been possible last visit. We tried to draw blood but Simba had had enough and you do not push the tolerance of a 100lb pup who’s Done With It All.
Come peruse tonight’s Tops, then hang in the comments with us!
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