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PWB Survival Tactics: Combating Anxiety! The Circle of Okay [1]

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Date: 2025-01-30

Hi everyone! I am sitting in my endocrinologist’s office as I type this, proactively prepping in case Medicaid gets defunded. See, I have Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, which means my immune system is slowly destroying my thyroid, which means I will — or should — be on replacement thyroid hormone for the rest of my life. The treatment is simple, or should be: just supplement the hormone your body is failing to make on its own. No problem — unless Medicaid gets defunded.

All of which means I’m a little anxious right now :-)

I used to have baaaad panic attacks. Like, abandon a full cart in the grocery store kind of panic attacks. I would get absolutely paralyzed. And especially when there is a real, actual threat, paralysis is not helpful. We’re not monkeys hoping not to be spotted by a hungry jaguar anymore — staying still will not save us :-) We need to be able to respond, and to respond appropriately.

In the course of working on this with my therapists (it was a recurrent issue over a number of years) I slowly learned that most anxiety is really threat anticipation: we’re responding to our own projections of what we think might happen. And even if it does eventually happen, even if it’s as bad or even worse than we imagine, the important thing is it is not happening now.

Which means the anxiety and paralysis are burning time and energy that we could use instead (like I am today) to prepare.

So today I’m going to share a tactic one therapist taught me. It’s excellent for reducing anxiety and turning down the noise on imagined or anticipated threats, so we can respond in a timely manner to the ones that are actually happening. I call this tactic the “Circle of Okay”.

Welcome to PWB Theme Thursdays! If you’ve never visited or commented in a PWB (Pootie/Woozle/Birdie) diary before, come on in — the water is fine, and the folks are always friendly! A few quick guidelines: No trolling the diary.

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One of the drawbacks of being politically aware is we tend to look at things very broadly — on a nationwide or even worldwide scale. And of course if you look at the entire globe, there are all KINDS of effed-up things going on! And it can really toss one into a tizzy.

The Circle of Okay is a great way to combat that, without burying your head in the sand or ignoring reality. It’s simply about recognizing what is truly impacting you, right now, here, in this present moment :-)

So start by mentally drawing just a one or two-foot circle around yourself. Just a little one. And look at yourself (in your head) inside this little circle and ask yourself, “Am I okay? Is there anything in this little circle that is an immediate threat?” Don’t challenge your anxiety directly. Don’t tell it to shut up and go away! It’ll only get louder in protest (I know; I’ve tried!).

Instead, ask your anxiety “Is there anything in this little circle that is causing you?”

The answer is almost invariably “No”.

Usually, your panic will back off a little as soon as it has made this small admission, but if it hasn’t, repeat the exercise, just in that one tiny circle you’ve drawn in your head. Eventually your anxiety will throw in the towel and admit that no, there is nothing in a two-foot radius that is imminently dangerous.

So then draw your circle a little larger — four feet, maybe. And ask yourself again, “Am I okay in this circle? Is there anything in it that’s an immediate threat?”

And when your anxiety acknowledges that no, there’s no immediate threat in that circle, take a deep breath, let it out, let yourself relax a little more, and do it again. I usually get myself up to a radius of five or six feet and call it good — a circle ten feet across is big enough to give me room to do almost anything I need to do, because it travels with me. I am always the center of it. And in that ten feet of space, I know I am okay.

ai iz okai.

And if something dangerous does come within that circle? I am calm enough to perceive it, and to respond accordingly!

***

I hope all that makes sense! Seriously, if you are prone to anxiety attacks, try it. All anxiety does is burn energy, often leaving us too exhausted to respond to actual threats. So give it a shot, see if it helps — the whole idea is to husband your energy to respond to the real threats as they come!

And now for some goofies! I think we’ve earned them :-)

Me at the end of January:

Sung to the tune of ‘Love Me Tender’:

There are kitties involved! Promise!

Yeah, uhmm….

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