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The Dark Night of the King [1]

['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']

Date: 2025-01-19

By David Glenn Cox

Here as we stand on the threshold of darkness as the King is annunciated by Elon’s falling star and the chill hand of Providence. The wise men runneth from the star in terror. A very successful failure, but still largely a success. Veiled harbingers of the future perhaps? To see and not to see. President elect John Tyler rode his horse in the Inaugural parade on a bitter cold day. Then he gave a dandy fine long speech in the out of doors. Took to his bed, the end.

The message for the new King is not to let the weather intimidate you. You’ll be fine. Leave out the horseback ride and you’ll be fine. Do you want to be remembered as the smallest tiniest mushroom shaped indoor inaugural in history? A limp exhibition? An old man out in the bitter cold for a few hours. What’s wrong with that? Dare I say it? Don’t be a wuss. Get out there and bask in the warmth of your own magnificence, despite the subfreezing temperatures. This is your last chance.

“Today, today, today I consider myself, myself, the luckiest man on earth, earth.”

This is it sunny Jim; it’s all downhill from here. This is your moment, take it and take heed. Not Tik Tok but tick, tick. The clock is already running! Celestial clowns in positions of authority promise the efficiency of a Buster Keaton comedy. Bronco busting in the flea circus. Herding cats and riverboat gamblers, corporate ramblers, drunken enablers and crooked behaviors. The dark night of the King has begun.

I’d like to make you a friendly little wager. Sometime in the next five to ten years, if not sooner, there will be a serious gambling scandal in a major sport. It is inevitable and predictable! If Pete Rose weren’t dead already, this would kill him. Gambling is all about beating the odds. How can you best beat the odds? There are only six sides on a dice and fifty-two cards in a deck, but sports betting? A bad call, a missed field goal just to shave a few points.

It's all innocent fun until there are millions and millions of dollars riding on it. The sports leagues welcome in their assassins with open arms and make partnership agreements with them. Please pimp out my product and destroy its future and credibility, please? Up till now, we’ve been insanely successful at running these cash cow sports leagues. We make millions and pay few taxes. We’re worth billions ourselves, but somehow convince the public to build our grandiose stadiums. You need bread and circuses, Mister!

So, now we’ve figured out the only way we could possibly make it any better for ourselves is to get in bed with professional gamblers. People who use our sport parasitically to obtain their own goals, not ours. Do gamblers care if the Broncos or the Bears or Badgers get a black eye like the Black Sox? Do gamblers have the best interest of the sporting world in mind?

A forward pass is a fumble, and a fumble could be a forward pass. That motherfucker wouldn’t give me a new contract, this is probably my last year in the league, fuck em. I got three ex-wives, six kids, two mortgages and a Ferrari to take care of.

Or there won’t be a scandal; at least not one that you’ll ever hear about anyway. (Michael Jordan unexpectantly decides to play baseball!) Two NFL playoff games, one upset, just saying. A twelve-team college football playoff because twenty-four teams were too many to try and pack in. The goal was to multiply the number of gambling opportunities. Then all same teams from the old system rise to the top. Surprise! Ohio State and Notre Dame. Color me shocked.

Don’t trust anyone in the days of darkness. Don’t expect fair play or a fair deal. Look who is minding the store. Mickey Mantle was officially banned from baseball for taking a job as a door greeter in a Las Vegas casino. “Hi, I’m Mickey Mantle”= paycheck and he was already past his playing days. Baseball + Gamblers no, no, no! Or, okay sure, why not? Official partner of the Tanzanian Terrors know when to say when. Gambling problem? Not surprised.

Craft beer, legal weed and bread and circuses. Mystify the mutants while you mollify the morons. Las Vegas is proud to welcome two new sports franchises. Sure! We can build you a new stadium Mister. Because well because, we really love sports in Las Vegas. It is hyper symbolic, the town founded by Bugsy Siegel (Gambler and Gangster) now joins the major leagues.

Who would have thunk it? Michael Corleone’s promise about the family going completely legit someday has finally come to pass. The family is still in the same business as always, only now it’s legit. Offering high interest credit cards or payday loans. Look Kaye! We’re legit! Buy here, pay here! Where we treat you like our chum!

Full-throated decadence without a hint of shame. Finally, a way to claw back those hard-earned wages from the proletariat. Fleece the sucker at the front door and sell him his shoes back at the back door. Never give a sucker an even break. Cheat him out of his lunch money on the way to school while you steal his retirement out the back door. Cast a macho image of, making good side money betting on football. Everybody is doing it. You could win the rent money back, without your spouse ever finding out.

All games are completely legit, and you can trust me because? Because um ah, because ah, just because. Because you can trust me! Just because my own future is tied directly to gambling interests is no reason to suspect, I can’t be fair.

“Give them bread and circuses and they will never revolt.” – Juvenal, poet in Ancient Rome.”

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