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Cheers and Jeers: Wednesday [1]
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Date: 2023-11-15
Wednesday Morning Vonnegut Blogging Saturday was author, lecturer, and humanist Kurt Vonnegut’s 101st birthday. Wrote Dinitia Smith in her New York Times obituary: Like Mark Twain, Mr. Vonnegut used humor to tackle the basic questions of human existence: Why are we in this world? Is there a presiding figure to make sense of all this, a god who in the end, despite making people suffer, wishes them well? […] Not all Mr. Vonnegut’s themes were metaphysical. With a blend of vernacular writing, science fiction, jokes and philosophy, he also wrote about the banalities of consumer culture, for example, or the destruction of the environment. In his memory, some bits of rhetorical Vonnegoodness (of which he left us a bountiful harvest) below the fold:
Vonnegut (Cont’d)
✌ Hello, babies. Welcome to Earth. It’s hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It’s round and wet and crowded. At the outside, babies, you’ve got about a hundred years here. There’s only one rule that I know of, babies—‘God damn it, you’ve got to be kind.’ ✌ When things go well for days on end, it is a hilarious accident. ✌ “If you keep up with current events in the supermarket tabloids, you know that a team of Martian anthropologists has been studying our culture for the past ten years, since our culture is the only one worth a nickel on the whole damn planet. You can forget Brazil and Argentina. Anyway: They went back home last week, because they knew how terrible global warming was about to be. Their space vehicle wasn’t a flying saucer. It was more like a flying soup tureen. And they’re little all right, only six inches high. But they aren’t green. They’re mauve.” Happy 101st, Kurt, wherever ye be. ✌ "I love science. All Humanists do. I’m particularly fond of the Big Bang Theory. It goes like this: There was once all this nothing, and it was so much nothing that there wasn’t even such a thing as nothing. And then all of a sudden there was this great big BANG, and that’s where all this crap came from. Forget the Bible. Any questions? You know what they should put over the entrance to the Physics Department? Just that one word: BANG!” ✌ Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand. ✌ “A show of hands, please: How many of you have had a teacher at any stage of your education, from the first grade until this day in May, who made you happier to be alive, prouder to be alive, than you had previously believed possible? Good! Now say the name of that teacher to someone sitting or standing near you. All done? If this isn’t nice, what is?” ✌ “Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.” ✌ "There is no reason why good cannot triumph as often as evil. The triumph of anything is a matter of organization. If there are such things as angels, I hope that they are organized along the lines of the Mafia."
And, of course, my personal adopted motto:
✌ I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.
Happy Birthday, Kurt. And now, our feature presentation...
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Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, November 15, 2023
Note: This note is sponsored by silence. If you're still hearing these words in your head as you read them, you should probably try new extra-strength silence. If that doesn’t work, sorry but we’re all out of ideas. —Mgt.
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By the Numbers:
9 days ‘til Jamestown’s “Foods & Feasts.
Days 'til 2024: 47
Days 'til Foods & Feasts of Colonial Virginia at the Jamestown Settlement: 9
Year-over-year increase in consumer spending as of October: 2.6%
Average price of a gallon of gas, according to Triple-A: $3.36
Number of buckets of warm spit the new Supreme Court "code of ethics" is worth: 0
Age of Maryann Trump Brady—Trump's sister—when she died Sunday of embarrassment: 86
Number of steps on the stoop of 123 Sesame Street: 6
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 187 (including 4 beast governments and 1 liberal war on Thanksgiving parades). Soul Protection Factor 12 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Sup, bro?
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CHEERS to green shoots, light at the end of the tunnel, rainbows following the storm, and unfettered optimism of every kind. These days there's pretty much only one kind of survey I trust when it comes to gauging our collective view of the economy: the ones done by official agencies that actually have something to do with the economy. So, contrary to the media polls and their often misleading questions designed to generate pessimistic responses, this one by the New York Fed is a breath of fresh air:
New survey data released Monday by the Federal Reserve Bank of New York showed that U.S. consumers believe inflation will continue to ease, the labor market will remain strong and they will continue to spend more than they did pre-pandemic. The October Survey of Consumer Expectations painted a largely more positive picture than the New York Fed’s survey a month before, when consumers were as apprehensive of not making a minimum debt payment as they were in the early stages of the Covid-19 pandemic. […] Overall, more respondents to the New York Fed survey said their households were better off than they were this time last year.
The households that were the happiest in October: the ones whose kids were off to college.
JEERS to today's edition of Well That's Just Pathetic, You Insecure Little Manbaby—Do You Need A Manbaby Pacifier, Too? Courtesy of NBC News:
A presidential meeting at an undisclosed location. Students lining the streets waving Chinese flags. A $2,000-per-plate dinner with the most powerful business executives in America. Every aspect of Chinese President Xi Jinping’s visit to California this week has been highly choreographed, down to what he sees outside the window during a motorcade ride and what camera angle he’s recorded from, according to people familiar with the planning. … “Nothing can go wrong. It has to be 100% perfect,” [Victor] Cha said, adding that the goal for the Chinese is that Xi be “treated like an emperor, and anything short of that or embarrassing is really the absolute worst thing that can happen for them.”
This has been today's edition of Well That's Just Pathetic, You Insecure Little Manbaby—Do You Need A Manbaby Pacifier, Too?
CHEERS to Mary Had A Little Lamb. Back in the day, you could play that tune with the buttons on your touch-tone phone, which was invented on this date in 1963. It was almost as awesome as being able to spell out BOOBIES with your calculator by punching in 5318008 and turning it upside down. Man, we were wild back then. You kids have no idea.
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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JEERS to blowing smoke up Europe's ass. Oh, Iceland...how could you? Things were going so well until one of your volcanoes—Mount Fagradalsfjall—decided this would be a good time to lift a cheek and blow an air biscuit. Classy! If worst comes to worst, people will be warned to stay inside so they don't destroy their health from the ash. And many commercial flights will be cancelled because the expected "plume of grit" is highly abrasive, dirty, disruptive and screws up a plane's engines so that it can't move forward. Iceland's exploding volcanoes: the GOP of the natural world.
CHEERS to sweet sounds. The 66th annual Grammy nominations were announced late last week and you can check out all the nominees here. I always go to the Spoken Word category (changed this year, as you’ll see below) first, because there's a good chance it'll have an Obama or a Carter or a Maddow on it. And this year…there is!
Best Audio Book, Narration, and Storytelling Recording One of Jimmy Carter’s Grammy Awards resides at the Carter Center in Atlanta. Big Tree—Meryl Streep Boldly Go: Reflections On A Life Of Awe And Wonder—William Shatner The Creative Act: A Way Of Being—Rick Rubin It's Ok To Be Angry About Capitalism—Senator Bernie Sanders The Light We Carry: Overcoming In Uncertain Times—Michelle Obama Vermin...and the Vermin Who Love Them—Donald Trump
That last one isn’t officially on the ballot yet, but Rudy Giuliani is suing in all 50 states to get it added, and when has he ever lost?
Taylor Swift, Billie Eilish, and Miley Cyrus got their usual 150 nominations each, and my all-time favorite composer, John Williams, got his 74th, 75th, and 76th nods (for his The Fabelmans and Indiana Jones V scores). Other notables on the Grammy list: The Rolling Stones, Dolly Parton, Bruce Springsteen, and Joni Mitchell. The awards get handed out on February 4th. And those kids better keep the noise down or I'm calling the police.
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Ten years ago in C&J: November 15, 2013
CHEERS to grilling Miss Moneybags. The Senate Banking Committee holds a confirmation hearing today for Janet Yellen, who is the president's nominee to be the Federal Reserve Chair. This is the freaky part: she'll be doing it from a "chair" owned by the government and therefore a "federal" chair…that they will "reserve" exclusively for her. I ain't no expert, but I say that's good karma right there, bub.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to naming rights. Lost in all the hoopla about trivial issues like the federal budget, abortion bans, and Republican attempts to throw America into the toilet and flush, is the most pressing issue of the day: what parents are naming their spawn, of course. So allow me to terminate the suspense: some of the most popular baby names of 2024 are expected to be…um, different:
Parenting trends influencing baby naming trends include an emphasis on gender and racial diversity, the adultification of children's style, and a movement toward gentle parenting. When I was a baby I thought my parents had named me Toughshitkid. Girls names for boys “Feminine boy names often appeal for their symbolism, soft and sensitive image (more on that later), or connections to the past,” Nameberry writes. Examples include Artemis, Blair, Carmen, Cleo, Harlow, Jade, Morgan, Raven, Robin, Willow and Winter. Feminine feminist names These are names in which “feminine can be feminist, strength is attractive, and individuality should be embraced,” Nameberry writes. Examples include Althea, Colette, Dahlia, Dorothea, Eleanora, Kiara, Lavender, Matilda, Tabitha, Theodora and Vienna. Natural glamour Nameberry says natural glamour names promote “an unpretentious life, but edged with low-key subtle style. “These names are classy but in a subtle way—they feel at home on the homestead or at a five-star hotel,” Nameberry adds. Examples include Archie, Celia, Cillian, Conrad, Daphne, Estelle, Flora, Greta, Guy, Harvey, Mabel, Phoebe and Viola.
Hit the link for the full list. Interesting that there's no Donald, Don Jr., Ivanka, or Eric in the bunch. I suspect they'll be showing up on 2025's list of baby name trends under the first-ever heading: Inmate Numbers.
Oh, and Happy Birthday to Daily Kos’s shrill lefty front-page blogger and A+++ Russia-Ukraine War analyst Mark Sumner...and many blessings on your camels. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial Liberal Critics of Bill in Portland Maine’s ‘Cheers and Jeers’ Come Out Swinging: ‘This is Bullshit’ —Mediaite
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[END]
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