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MAGA 2024: An 'Offer' We MUST Refuse [1]

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Date: 2023-10-26

Effectively cued by US Rep Jamie Raskin (D-MD), the Ballad of Big Blonder is something to sing about- albeit sardonically. (See below.)

Steeped in Constitutional law, battling lymphoma, no doubt still behind on his sleep from having penned (by the midnight oil) the riveting bestseller Unthinkable: Trauma, Truth, and the Trials of American Democracy, Raskin decries the Teflon Donald in no uncertain terms (viz. “’He’s like a mob boss…,’” The Guardian).

So. For an upbeat-AND-unflinching take on our still-festering, Trump-inflicted wounds, with a nod to songwriters Tom Kelly and Billy Steinberg (hint: their version involves “virgin”), maestro, please cue “Like A Mob Boss.”

I made it through impeachment,

Somehow I made it through.

Then I set my crazy sights on a J6 coup.

They indict? I will fight.

Now my foes lie awake at night-

‘Cause I made ‘em an offer,

Yeah I made ‘em an offer, they can’t refuse!

CHORUS: Like a mob boss/Lord of disorganized crime.

Like a mob boss/Hoping not to do hard time.

Gonna give you all the finger.

See what you put me through!

If you kill my deja-coup, you know I will sue.

I took docs; I’m in hock.

I can’t stop, so I must stay bold

‘Cause the law found out

Yeah, the law found out about the stuff that I stole!

(REPEAT CHORUS)

Win-or-coup, I can’t lose.

I’m the King; we are not amused!

‘Cause we still have ways; oh, we still have ways

To give the Devil his due!

(REPEAT CHORUS)

OUTRO: Like a mob boss, ooh-ooh like a mob boss.

On your knees you go.

When I threaten, you can reckon, I’m in heaven.

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (etc.).

Up the creek, up the river for the very first time….

Parody lyrics copyright 2023 John McQueen.

Dedicated to Rep Raskin. His family. Tom Lehrer. And our still-besieged nation.

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