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Caturday Pootie Diary: Come look at memes with Freddie (Back to normal edition) [1]
['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']
Date: 2023-08-12
“You left at your normal time and came back again,” Freddie observed.
“I’m healthy now and my vacation is over,” I told him. “So, yeah, the schedule is back to normal.”
“I like having you home.”
“Thank you.”
“But I’m glad things are back to normal.”
I blew out a breath. “You and me both,” I said. “I liked hanging out with you but it’s nice to be able to do things again.”
“Normal things,” he clarified.
“Normal things,” I agreed. I opened the laptop in front of me. “Like looking at memes,” I said.
“Oooh,” he said, squeezing in under my arm so we could snuggle and look for them.
A gentle reminder of how we do things: 🐱🐶🐦 Do not troll the diary. If you hate pootie diaries, leave now. No harm, no foul.
Please do share pics of your fur kids! If you have health/behavior issues with your pets, feel free to bring it to the community.
Pooties are cats; Woozles are dogs. Birds... are birds! Peeps are people.
Whatever happens in the outer blog STAYS in the outer blog. If you’re having “issues” with another Kossack, keep it “out there.” This is a place to relax and play; please treat it accordingly. There are some pics we never post: snakes, creepy crawlies, any and all photos that depict or encourage human cruelty toward animals. These are considered “out of bounds” and will not be tolerated. If we alert you to it, please remember that we do have phobic peeps who react strongly to them. If you keep posting banned pics...well then...the Tigress will have to take matters in hand. Or, paw
“That never happens to me,” Freddie said.
I snorted. “you’ve been wrong before,” I told him.
“When?” he demanded.
I thought about it. “I’ll have to think about that and get back to you.”
“You call me ‘little guy,’” Freddie said, making the same face as the cat in meme.
“Because you’re my little guy.”
“And ‘buddy,’” he continued.
“Because you’re my buddy.”
“And sometimes ‘monkey.’”
“Only when you’re being a monkey.”
“Waking up is terrible,” I observed.
“Unless it’s dinnertime.”
“It’s you!” he said, with a feline laugh.
“It’s me,” I said, ruffling his fur.
“I don’t know how you drink that. It smells terrible.”
“It’s not good for kitties so it’s good it smells bad to you.”
“That’s you!” I said, pointing.
“I’m not that big,” he said.
“When we’re sharing a bed it feel like you are!”
“You are a sweet little snuggly killing machine,” I said.
“That’s both of us,” I said.
“Eating is pretty fun,” Freddie agreed.
“They should give that to him,” Freddie said, concerned. “He needs it.”
“He doesn’t need it,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s too much, it would make him sick.”
“But he says he needs it, and I bet being sick would be worth it.”
“Not to the human that has to clean up his barf.”
I laughed.
“I don’t get it,” Freddie said.
“It’s a joke based on the words ‘stepladder’ and ‘stepfather,’” I said. “They are similar enough that the kitty is mixing them up for comic effect.”
He thought about it. “That’s not very funny,” he said.
“Well, no, not when it has to be explained to you.”
“Kids don’t like to see their parents kiss,” I explained.
“They look sweet,” Freddie said.
I looked at him in surprise. “I didn’t know you were into romance!”
“Sometimes you smell like other cats,” Freddie said, darkly.
“If I see a cat, I’m going to pet a cat,” I said with a shrug.
“We don’t fart,” he said, indignant.
“I’m pretty sure you do,” I said, swallowing a laugh.
“What…?” Freddie wondered, confused.
“Humans have tools that can change the way pictures look,” I explained.
“You shouldn’t do that,” he said.
I shrugged. “Sometimes, but this is harmless.”
“They made that poor cat square!”
“Not really,” I said, looking into his angry face. “You know what? Let's look at something else.”
“It looks like a nice place to sleep. It’s warm and bumpy.”
“But then we can’t look at memes,” I reminded him.
He sighed. “I suppose I can wait.”
“Why do you do that?” I asked.
“If we want to be kissed, we’ll let you know.
“I did not like that one bit!” Freddie raged.
“I know,” I said, soothingly. “But it’s the only way to get an accurate reading.”
“They don’t need to be reading anything on me,” he growled. “I am not a library! There is no library in there!”
I coughed loudly to cover my laugh, not wanting to hurt his feelings. “Are you sick again?” he demanded.
“Nope,” I choked out.
He frowned up at me.
“The CDC says not to do that to you. I read up on how to protect you when I got sick.”
“It doesn’t look very comfortable,” he conceded.
“You get used to it, but you’ll never find out.”
“That’s a great question,” Freddie said, jumping to the ground.
I checked my watch. “Oh! You’re right! It’s dinner time.”
“I told you I was never wrong,” he called back as he trotted into the kitchen.
Happy Caturday, Peeps! Freddie and I are planning to spend this evening relaxing and watching movies and hanging out with you. We can’t wait!
[END]
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