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BREAKING NEWS! Preparing BBQ and Other Benefits of Slavery [1]
['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']
Date: 2023-08-09
Welcome to another addition of the Scoop Chamber on MSCNN! I am your host Dingo Rusher, and thank you very much for joining me today.
Today, we are going to explore the Goper’s latest foray into the education space. For those of you who have lost track of their latest controversial move, let me bring you up to speed.
After the blowback to their original plan to get rid of the Advanced Placement course in Black History all together in Florida, Governor DeSantis put together a hand-picked board to come up with some new standards for the “new and improved” course. The new standards in part read: “Instruction includes how slaves developed skills which, in some instances could be applied for their personal benefit.” To be fair, the old course did talk about slaves learning things, but two house negroes on DeSantis’ board (William Allen and Frances Presley Rice), insisted on including the “benefit” language that came to be so controversial.
Now, on the Scoop Chamber, we try to air both sides of a debate, so to that end, we invited Governor Ron DeSantis from the great state of Florida to set the record straight. Thank you very much for joining us today governor.
GD: Thank you very much for having me Dingo. I welcome the opportunity to counter the disinformation from the woke left.
DR: That’s as good a place to start as any Governor. What do you mean by disinformation?
GD: Dingo, as you know, we were very thorough in documenting the fact that workers of that era…
DR: Wait a minute Governor. Workers? Don’t you mean slaves?
GD: Are you saying they weren’t working Dingo? That, by the way, would be a prime example of fake news. But, if I may, I’d like to finish my earlier point.
DR: Go ahead Governor.
GD: As I was saying, to be cost effective, workers had to be taught specific skills. We gave examples of a person who became a blacksmith after the civil war.
DR: You are referring to the examples of people who you say benefitted from their enslavement.
GD: Yes Dingo. Now listen, I’m not saying working under certain conditions is the right way to go, but it’s misleading to not include that information in a course on Black History.
DR: The silver lining to slavery as it were.
GD: Now there you go again Dingo with the left-wing propaganda. Let me ask you this: Do you know what $3 billion industry was invented in the 1800s?
DR: Enlighten me Governor.
GD: Workers of the time did not have access to the best cuts of meat. They invented the low and slow method of cooking that we know of today as BBQ. Now there’s a BBQ joint on every third corner in America, a direct result of skills some people developed at the time! Can you imagine what life would be like without some good Q whenever you wanted it? I for one, think Black students would be proud to learn their ancestors were responsible for such a uniquely American addition to world’s palette.
DR: Since it’s the truth right?
GD: Yes.
DR: And to be clear, slaves were only given cuts of meat their masters did not deem fit for their own table, so they had to figure out a way to make them palatable.
GD: But it’s BBQ!!
DR: Sure. And since you are so interested in the truth, do you also feel the students should be taught that slaves were routinely killed, beaten, and raped at the whim of their masters?
GD: Well we have to be careful there Dingo. We don’t want the white students to feel guilty about those unfortunate times you know.
DR: Of course Governor; we wouldn’t want that. Let’s move on. Now, I’m going to say something that may surprise you, and get me in trouble with my friends on the left. Their argument against what you are doing, in part, centers on whether the examples you gave of slaves learning skills was historically accurate. I agree with you on this point, at least in the sense that there is no question that slaves learned skills while in bondage. I would have to ask you however, what exactly is the point of mentioning this “fact” at all, in the context of teaching about the horrors of slavery, except to indoctrinate students into thinking that the institution of forced bondage was not the abomination we know it was?
GD: Because it’s the truth Dingo as I said before. Why is the left so afraid of the truth?
DR: Well putting aside your being deathly afraid to mention anything about the common practice of male slave owners raping their female slaves as a matter of course, I just don’t see why you need to mention the “benefit” thing at all. True or not, it is not remotely relevant given the larger context of the moral failing that slavery epitomized, and again, only serves to imply the institution was not as bad as it has been historically portrayed.
Governor, there are all manner of truths in the human experience. That does not mean they are necessarily relevant to the subject at hand. Here are some other “truths” Governor. The Nazis killed ten million innocent people when they were in power, mostly Jews. Many of those people were enslaved in factories supporting the Nazi war machine. Are you saying, in teaching about the holocaust, it’s vitally important we carve out time to let students know that some Jews learned valuable skills, such as how to make airplane parts that could benefit them later in life? That’s if of course, they weren’t subsequently gassed or starved to death. Oh sorry, you’d leave that part out lest it make modern Nazis feel guilty.
GD: Now you’re being unnecessarily provocative Dingo. The lamestream media…
DR: Am I Governor? You said it, not me, that you had to teach students, that slaves benefitted from their captivity and forced labor, because it is “true”. How is my reference to the experience of the Jews during the holocaust any less “true”?
GD: Dingo, I am not a historian, so…
DR: Indeed you are obviously not Governor. And if you are so interested in the truth, why do your new standards specifically omit any mention of Black Lives Matter, the most significant civil rights movement of the past decade?
GD: Well that I do know about Dingo. Remember, BLM was behind the tragedy on January 6th. A group like that is not appropriate subject matter for young minds.
DR: Presumably the two-thousand plus white people we all saw with our own eyes on TV, attacking officers and trashing the Capitol, were Black people in white face paint.
GD: Well some were ANTIFA and FBI provocateurs.
DR: I am sure you are correct Governor.
I think we’ll leave it at that. This is Dingo Rusher, and thank you all for watching another addition of the Scoop Chamber!
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https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/8/9/2186288/-BREAKING-NEWS-Preparing-BBQ-and-Other-Benefits-of-Slavery
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