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What REALLY happened to Mitch McConnell [1]

['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']

Date: 2023-07-28

Right in the middle of a speech, in mid-sentence, Mitch McConnell abruptly stopped talking and became stiff and lifeless. There was speculation that he suffered a stroke or some kind of seizure. Later, McConnell was asked what he believed had happened to him, and he didn’t answer! (He simply said “I’m fine.”) So, what is he trying to hide?

Just seconds before McConnell’s sudden freeze, he used the word “bipartisan” in his speech. I think that could be a clue.

Here is my theory:

Mitch McConnell is not a real human being. He is actually an inanimate wooden doll. Many years ago, the doll’s fairy demagogue appeared and waved her magic wand to make him into a real senator. However, the magic spell had a few conditions that were required to keep it in place: McConnell had to be rigidly partisan at all times, and must obstruct anything that could possibly help the American people at large. He was also told that if he ever so much as utters the word “bipartisan”, the spell would be broken and he would revert to being a wooden doll again.

Do you have a better explanation?

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[1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/7/28/2183865/-What-REALLY-happened-to-Mitch-McConnell

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