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Political Limerick - Republican Grooms 19-year-old [1]

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Date: 2023-05-27

Bryan Slaton, the representative of Texas House District 2, was expelled from the legislature on May 9, 2023. He was elected in 2020 after defeating the incumbent in the Republican primary by a 22 percent margin. He previously worked as a youth minister for 13 years. In 2021, Slaton introduced a bill that would have called for the death penalty for women and doctors performing abortions. In 2023, he introduced a bill calling for a referendum on Texas secession and promised a bill banning minors from drag shows. In April 2023 a report emerged that the married 45-year-old had sexual intercourse with a 19-year-old female intern after getting her drunk. (The young woman took a morning-after pill the next day.) A House investigating committee recommended expulsion.

There once was a house rep named Bryan

Elected without even tryin'

His surname was Slaton

And groomers he's hatin'

He jumped in the pan where he's fryin'.

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A married man and forty-five

Brought down by his reckless sex drive

He wanted a whirl

With just a young girl

To get her in bed he'd connive.

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To coax her to lie in his bunk

He plied her with booze til' she's drunk

Cuz' liquor is quicker

The better to stick her

His actions were worse than a skunk.

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Though pro-life's the way he would see

He had the girl take a Plan B

Life starts at conception

But there's an exception

A good old boy who's on a spree.

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Nineteen-year-old intern was bold

She went to the lege and she told

Her story was terse

Just chapter and verse

His cheatin' heart must have gone cold.

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His fellow Republicans held

A meeting where he was compelled

He showed no remorse

We knew it of course

Then Slaton was fully expelled.

= = =

This verdict could not come faster

At his church it's a disaster

Your daughter's a teen?

You prob'ly turned green

His last job was a youth pastor.



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[1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/5/27/2171830/-Political-Limerick-Republican-Grooms-19-year-old

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