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Dear Ron DeSantis: Next Time Put Your Faith in the Roadrunner, Not so Much the Coyote. [1]
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Date: 2023-05-25
Beep Beep!
Watching the clown show that Twitter has become, culminating in the “can’t allow that to happen, ever” fumbling of a Presidential campaign launch, made me laugh out loud. Not laugh out loud like at an actual circus, no this was more a laugh laced with hearty schadenfreude. Elon Musk’s endeavors are like watching a man build dips into his road so he can make the square wheels work.
Electric cars are a good idea. Electric cars that explode into balls of fiery lithium-ion smoke are not.
Buying one of the world’s biggest social networks also, could have been a good idea. If only he had not sat by and watched it turn into a right wing cesspool, right? So turning Twitter, a site which is not supposed to be partisan, into a launching pad for Ronny Receding Hair had to have been right up his alley.
Sadly for Musk, and Ronny Go-Go Boots, he once again experienced an unexpected rapid unscheduled disassembly of a launch. This seems to be a habit of his with launches, which quite frankly, makes me wonder how he pulled off the concept of fatherhood.
As you might remember, Elon’s rocket left the ground, then promptly, well, “kablooie.” If Elon was a Bond villain, his best chance would be to hope James is too busy laughing to notice anything that actually goes according to plan.
Seriously, I would be more scared of the white cat.
With the spectacular failure that is Ronny DeStepford’s presidential campaign launch, Elon Musk is now qualified to be the Chief Executive Officer of ACME, Inc.
The screen kept saying “Preparing to launch”. But this wasn’t one of Elon Musk’s space rockets that soars through the stratosphere and settles into a comfortable orbit. This was one that blew up on the pad in a dazzling ball of flame. The eccentric billionaire had invited Ron DeSantis, the governor of Florida, to the somewhat niche Twitter Spaces – a dedicated audio streaming feature on the social media platform – to announce his run for the Republican nomination for president in 2024.
And..
It was an even bigger political disaster for DeSantis, who has built the entire theory of his candidacy around the idea that he is an efficient chief executive of Florida who pays attention to detail. Even Trump used to be able to put out 280 characters on Twitter, admittedly often in a seemingly random order.
You want to hear something funny? Most cruise lines have hooked up with his internet, “Starlink.”
You know, in case you wonder why you haven’t heard from your relative on their vacation.
And you would have thought DeSantis would have gone somewhere like Cut-N-Shoot-the-Bud-Light-Can, Texas (Have they renamed it yet?) to start his campaign. You know how Pace Picante sauce supposedly comes from San Antonio, “where folks know what good salsa is s’posed ta taste like?” Well he could have gone to East Texas, where people know “what those funny rainbows are good for.”
But no, the man that governs the state of rockets, NASA, and the man building his own rockets, or as I like to put it, “really expensive fireworks” put their two noggins together and thought a presentation on untested-for-this-purpose technology would somehow be a good idea.
Shhh. Nobody tell Ronny DeBeerGut about YouTube. You know, a video site that has the capacity to broadcast live to millions.
Truly, the former guy could not be more pleased, as he is ridculing Ron for his “Ishtar” of a production, suggesting that, of course, “if you can’t even do this right..”
Which is true. Ronny DeDumbass somehow managed to turn the sigularly most important moment of his Presidential ambitions into an impending Saturday Night Live skit.
Why?
Because the man who wants to tell you how to live, and of course, thereby in need of projecting competence, trusted a man who founded a company that creates cars that have done this:
x My Tesla Y caught fire on Saturday, May 6 at the California hwy. I was driving on a ramp to enter the freeway when I hear a noise from the bottom. I opened my door and saw smoke coming from the bottom. It’s been 2 weeks and not a single follow up. I need answers. pic.twitter.com/kW4wTp6V2U — bishal malla (@bishal_malla1) May 18, 2023
And rockets that have done this:
.with his Presidential campaign launch.
Which went like this..
Which I believe will lead, once again, to this..
-ROC
I need to add to my The Claw News family. I work tirelessly each week to bring useful content that fights for real progressive change. Join me. If you don’t get your $3.99’s worth, I will personally refund you the month and take the loss on the fees. Guaranteed.
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Love,
-ROC
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[1] Url:
https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/5/25/2171282/-Dear-Ron-DeSantis-Next-Time-Put-Your-Faith-in-the-Roadrunner-Not-so-Much-the-Coyote
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