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Invasive Species [1]
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Date: 2023-05-21
Recent statistics from the Russians' "special military operation" in Ukraine
Invasive Species: Satire
By Lyer, Fibski & Propagandovitch, famous Moscow PR outlet
For immediate release:
We spoke again with our infamous colleague, the senior Russian pundit, who has access to the nomenklatura in Russia.
“As I said last time, we are blamed for everything”, he noted. “We are encircled by NATO and the Ukrainians have been given every opportunity to attack us in our special military operation. We have to defend our motherland when faced with external threats and are being constantly provoked. It is, how you say, very dangerous.”
“We are blamed for invading Georgia, invading Chechnya, invading Afghanistan, invading Czechoslovakia, invading Hungary. You might think we are like invasive species. But nothing could be further from truth. It is THEY who created the concrete reactionary situation that had to be corrected. Much like the American MAGA movement is trying to rectify”, he insisted. “We even gave fraternal assistance to Kazakhstan and Belarus recently. For free! And what do we get in return? Nothing!”
“Put-in is a man of his word. He cannot help it if words change. He sticks to situation as it deteriorates.”
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