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The FBI comes calling for George Santos... Or whatever his name is [1]

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Date: 2023-01-28

The request is the clearest sign to date of an active criminal investigation examining the congressman’s campaign finances

Transcript from FBI interaction with George Santos:

FBI GUY: Mr. Santos, we need to--

GEORGE: It's Devolder.

FBI GUY: What's Devolder?

GEORGE: My last name.

FBI GUY: Okay, George Devolder, we need--

GEORGE: First name's Tony.

FBI GUY: Tony?

GEORGE: Tony Devolder. That's my name.

FBI GUY: But you got elected under the name George Santos. So what is that, a stage name?

GEORGE: No, my stage name is Kitara Ravache. And right now, I'm going by my stage name.

FBI GUY: Look, sir--

GEORGE: Madam, not sir! Or Ms. Or "miss."

FBI GUY: Look, Kitana--

GEORGE: Kitara!

FBI GUY: So are you, in fact, George Santos?

GEORGE: Not right now. So if you're here to arrest George Santos, you'll have to come back when he's here.

FBI GUY: And when will that be?

GEORGE: When he gets back from repairing the Hubble Space Telescope.

FBI GUY: That's not even a thing anymore. There's the James Webb Space Telescope now.

GEORGE: Oh, listen to you, Mister "I-Know-All-About-NASA!"

FBI GUY: That's about enough, Santos-Devolder-whatever-your-transvestite-show name is.

GEORGE: Ravache! That's Brazilian for "ravishing!"

FBI GUY: No it's not.

GEORGE: You got me there. I like to embellish.

FBI GUY: You're under arrest.

GEORGE: How much do you have saved for retirement? I have an investment that will deliver 18% returns...

FBI GUY: All right, let's — Wait... Did you say 18%?

[END]
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[1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/1/28/2149820/-The-FBI-comes-calling-for-George-Santos-Or-whatever-his-name-is

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