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                               Stuck In Traffic
        "Independent Comment on Current Events and Cultural Phenomena"�
                           Issue #11 - February 1996


   ==================
   The Friendly Skies

   During January, I had the opportunity to fly to Florida for a
   long-weekend vacation and managed to get a great deal on a round trip
   airplane ticket on Delta airlines.  As I was getting settled on the
   plane, the flight attendants were making all their usual announcements.
   You have to have your seat in its full, upright position.  Tray tables
   have to be locked out of the way.  All your carry on baggage has to be
   stowed in the overhead bins or under the seat in front of you.  Anyone
   who has flown recently knows the routine.  But one of their
   announcements caught my attention.  The flight attendant told us that
   "current federal regulations" prohibit the operation of "certain
   portable electronic devices" while on the plane.  She further mentioned
   that a complete list of the devices allowed and disallowed could be
   found in the back of the Sky magazine that could be found in every
   seat.

   The reason this announcement caught my attention is that I have been
   lusting over laptop computers for a couple of years now and have just
   about decided that this is the year I'm going to give in to desire.  I
   thought that as I shopped for a laptop, it would be useful to know
   which brands were allowed to be used while in flight and which ones
   weren't.  Even if I never actually use one on a plane, (I rarely fly),
   the certification says something positive about the design of the
   laptop with regard to pesky radio emissions that can interfere with TVs
   and other stuff.  So I thumbed through the magazine and found the "In
   Flight, On Board" information section the flight attendant had referred
   to.  As it turns out, the federal regulations don't mention specific
   brands of devices like I had hoped.  Instead, they classify equipment
   into three categories:  devices which are always prohibited, devices
   which are only allowed while the plane is airborne, and those devices
   which are allowed at all times.

   The lists in the first two categories were rather unsurprising.  Radios
   that can transmit as well as receive are always prohibited.  I suppose
   they don't want some aviation enthusiast joining in the chat between
   the pilot and the control tower.  Also radios that could receive
   certain types of broadcasts were disallowed, I didn't recognize the
   sorts of frequencies that were listed, but I can guess that they'd
   rather not have people finding out that there is engine trouble by
   listening in on the pilot.  But mundane AM/FM radios seem to be
   allowed.  Laptop computers and electronic games are not allowed during
   takeoff and landing, but are allowed once airborne.  However,
   peripherals such as printers that are attached via a connecting cable
   aren't ever allowed, presumably because many cheap cables have very
   poor shielding and pose a risk of generating radio interference.

   But the third category in the federal regulations, the category of
   devices that are permitted at all times, had some surprises.  Current
   federal regulations, in their generosity I suppose, permit at all times
   the operation of electronic pace makers and "personal life support
   systems" as long as "the equipment conforms to the Federal Aviation
   Administration's criteria."  How generous and thoughtful of them!  Or
   perhaps they just wanted to spare the flight attendants the unpleasant
   task of requesting the elderly to turn off their pacemakers during the
   flight.

   =========
   Whiplash!

   Watching the President's State of the Union address, I couldn't help
   but wonder if this was the same man that took office in 1993.  It sure
   looked like him.  But it sure didn't sound like the same man that
   addressed the nation in 1993.

   Here's a couple of excerpts from his 1993 State of the Union address:

        "To create jobs and guarantee a strong recovery, I call on
        Congress to enact an immediate package of jobs investments of
        over $30 billion to put people to work now, to create a half
        a million jobs."

        "With a new network of community development banks and $1
        billion to make the dream of enterprise zones real, we
        propose to bring new hope and new jobs to storefronts and
        factories from South Boston to South Texas to South Central
        Los Angeles."

        "But all of our efforts to strengthen the economy will fail
        -- let me say this again; I feel so strongly about this --
        all of our efforts to strengthen the economy will fail unless
        we also take this year -- not next year, not five years from
        now, but this year -- bold steps to reform our health care
        system."

        "For the wealthiest -- those earning more than $180,000 per
        year -- I ask you all who are listening tonight to support a
        raise in the top rate for federal income taxes from 31 to 36
        percent.  We recommend a 10 percent surtax on incomes over
        $250,000 a year...".

        "Our plan does include a broad-based tax on energy....  I
        recommend that we adopt a BTU tax on the heat content of
        energy..."

   Compare that with his 1996 State of the Union address:

        "We know big government does not have all the answers.  There
        is not a program for every problem.  We know we need a
        smaller, less bureaucratic government in Washington -- one
        that lives within its means."

        "The era of big government is over."

        "I believe our new, smaller government must work in an
        old-fashioned American way -- together with all our citizens,
        through state and local governments, in the workplace, in
        religious, charitable, and civic associations."

   Not even George Bush's reversal on his "No new taxes" pledge matches
   Clinton's 180 degree about-face on the role of government.  And we're
   supposed to take this man seriously?  Which speech represents the real
   Bill Clinton?  Does anyone know?  Since the 1993 State of the Union
   address was Clinton's first after being elected, I have to conclude it
   is the speech that best represents Clinton's political agenda and his
   "vision" for the role of government.  Clinton's 1996 State of the
   Union, I have to conclude, was a bold and obvious pandering for votes
   in the upcoming election.


   =================================

       "It is unfair to bore someone who doesn't have the  opportunity to bore
     you right back." -- Garrison Keillor


   ===================
   The Blizzard of `96

   I'm sure everyone will be relieved to know that I survived the
   "Blizzard of `96."  But I have to confess that it really wasn't that
   big a deal for people where I live.  Geographically, Raleigh seems to
   lie at the very northern edge of what we call "the sun belt."  Most of
   the time, we don't get bad winter storms, and when we get them at all,
   we just get the southern edge of them.  So while most of the
   northeastern part of the country was digging out from heavy snowfalls
   that might legitimately be called a blizzard, we in North Carolina got
   only about 4 inches of snow and ice.

   But we didn't let that stop us from pretending we were suffering
   through a blizzard!  Oh no!  We made do the best we could with the
   meager deal we got from Mother Nature.  While it is true that North
   Carolinians aren't particularly accustomed to dealing with snow and
   ice, feigned hardship was the order of the day for about a week.

   It seems that the first concern everyone has when it starts snowing is
   the condition of the roads.  As a rule, North Carolinians don't really
   know how to drive on streets covered with ice and snow.  We just never
   have to do it.  We don't have snow tires.  It's rare that anyone has
   chains for their tires.  Likewise, the state and local governments
   aren't really prepared to clear the streets.  Oh sure, they have winter
   emergency plans which they carry out.  They dump salt and ashes on the
   major roadways.  They run snow plows through the streets.  But despite
   their best efforts, they didn't seem to be able to clear even 4 inches
   of snow and ice off the major roads.  And clearing the roads in
   residential areas is simply out of the question.  They simply did not
   have the manpower of equipment to do so.

   I don't bring this up in order to criticize the state and local
   governments.  Far from it.  Considering how rare it is for us to get
   winter weather severe enough to impede road travel, I think it would be
   a waste of tax payer money to buy that much snow clearing equipment and
   supplies.  I bring this up in order to criticize or local media
   reporters.  Just as we are inexperienced at driving on snow covered
   roads, and just as the governments are inexperienced at keeping the
   roads clear during a winter storm.  Our media reporters are
   inexperienced at covering the events.  They are desperate to find a way
   to sensationalize the story, but they come across sounding like
   hypocrites.  On the one hand, they constantly report on the state of
   the roadways.  One local TV station even periodically had a camera crew
   out by the side of the road giving you a close up shot of the road
   outside their station so you could see for yourself how bad the roads
   were, as if you couldn't look outside your window and see the same
   thing.  On the other hand, they media reporters reported how many
   millions of dollars was being spent every day with panicky tones in
   their voices like this was going to bring financial ruin to our
   government.  And I kept thinking to my self, "Well, which is it?  Do
   you want them to clear the roads or not?"  And the media coverage went
   downhill from there.  Toward the end of the storm, our local TV
   newscasts were running stories about how to deal with the cold, that
   were offering advice like, "Don't spend to much time out in the cold,"
   and "Don't let your feet get wet," and "Don't drive!"

   Most businesses were closed for 2 or 3 days at least.  Schools in North
   Carolina were closed for about a week.  I can't blame them, considering
   the amount of busing that's done in North Carolina and the state of the
   roadways.  But people acted like children were being victimized by
   their inability to go to school.  But try as they might, they were
   unable to interview a single kid willing to say they missed school!
   Imagine!  The Wake County School board issued edicts to parents to
   encourage them to make their children do something educational.  They
   recommended things like, have your children watch educational shows on
   Public TV, rent an educational video, and try to get your children to
   read a book.  All sensible suggestions, but never did they suggest that
   parents ought to review their children's school lessons with them or do
   anything related to their children's actual school activities.  The
   conspiracy theorist in me speculated that this was because the
   teacher's unions did not want the parents to realize just how much of
   their children's education they could handle on their own.

   The media frenzy surrounding North Carolina's relatively modest snow
   storm was more than a little silly, but it wasn't an entirely bad thing
   either.  In fact, after observing the media coverage of the snowstorm,
   and watching the people in my town, I had the sudden realization that
   people were _enjoying_ the snowstorm.  They _looked_forward_ to the
   dealing with the challenges that the snowstorm brought.  Once I
   realized this, all the silliness suddenly made sense.

   For example, when people down here hear that there is a storm coming,
   they rush to the grocery store and stock up on food.  Lots of it.  I
   saw entire families descend on the grocery story during the hours
   before the storm and walk out with multiple carts filled with
   groceries.  Now in the worst snowstorms of the past, people might be
   home-bound for 2 or 3 days, but these folks looked like they were
   stocking up for a month!  And even _during_ the storm, many of the
   grocery stores advertise that they're still open.  And people will
   bundle up and "hike" to the grocery store in order to get a loaf of
   bread, as if they couldn't live without it.  Why do people do this?
   Because they _like_ to do it, not because they're going to starve.

   Driving was the same way.  There was a parade of 4 wheel drive vehicles
   in my town during the snow storm.  It seems like every person that had
   a vehicle equipped to drive in these conditions all of a sudden had a
   need to do so.  As I was hiking along one of the major roadways in my
   town, I saw some people driving back and forth multiple times.  My
   parents have friends with a 4 wheel drive truck who spend their time
   during winter storms driving around and helping people pull their cars
   out of ditches.  They don't charge people money and refuse it when
   offered.  They _enjoy_ doing it.  Likewise, I hear of people with these
   sorts of vehicles that drive people to the doctor or hospitals of they
   can't get there during the storm.  They take hospital personnel to and
   from their jobs and things like that.  It seems kind of silly at first.
   And I suspect that there's more than a little jealousy in those of us
   who aren't able to drive in the snow.  But we have to keep in mind that
   many of those people who are showing off their trucks are often
   providing a valuable community service at the same time.  And why do
   they do this?  Because they _want_ to do it, not because they _have_ to
   do it.  They enjoy the challenge that the snow storm brings.

   Even mundane tasks take on a whole new meaning during a snowstorm.
   Taking out the garbage all of a sudden becomes a battle between you and
   nature to see whether you can take out the garbage without breaking
   your neck or catching a cold.  I confess that I found myself doing
   things I wouldn't ordinarily due during nice weather.  I found myself
   buying birdseed and spreading it out in the backyard for the birds.  I
   was unusually sociable with my neighbors.  Not that I don't get along
   with them during normal circumstances.  I do.  But I don't usually go
   out of my way to visit with them.  But during the snowstorm, we would
   compare notes on the latest weather reports and road conditions,
   looking after each other in a sense.

   The kids in the neighborhood were, of course, having a blast.  My
   street happens to be the best street in the neighborhood for sledding
   because it's a dead end street with a long sloping hill starting from
   the dead end, where I live, and running for about half the length of
   the street.  Since there is no through traffic and the hill ends well
   before you reach the connecting street, you don't have to worry about
   running into cars.  There was a steady stream of kids sledding down my
   street and I have to confess to trying it a couple of times myself.
   It's great fun.  But, I couldn't help but notice that sledding down a
   hill is far from the most exciting ride available these days.  Kids
   today have go carts tracks, amusement park rides, bicycles, and all
   sorts of other types of rides that are faster and more exciting than a
   sled ride.  But they love to sled anyway.  Why?  I suspect that partly
   it's the novelty.  But I also think the fun in sledding is not that you
   ride fast, but that you cam make it work _at all_.  The fun is in the
   challenge of making it work.

   On about the third day, I began to get cabin fever, so I bundled up and
   walked a few blocks to my friends' house and visited with them.  Like
   everyone else, I over did it.  I bundled up _way_ too much.  The
   temperature was only in the mid 20's but I had enough layers of clothes
   on to survive the arctic.  I wore my heaviest hiking boots.  Simply
   walking through the snow and ice became a big production.  I was
   determined not to fall.  I took small steps, firmly planting my foot
   before shifting my weight to it.  One learns to appreciate simple
   everyday concepts when walking on the snow and ice.  Concepts like
   traction, momentum, and center of gravity.  The sense of accomplishment
   I felt when I successfully navigated my way through the treachery and
   made it to my friends' house was indescribable, and, I have to admit,
   probably overblown for the amount of work and danger actually involved.

   After watching how people in my town deal with the Blizzard of `96 for
   a few days, I've realized that all the silliness, all the hype, all the
   overblown preparations stem from a fundamental craving for challenge.
   We _want_ to test ourselves against nature.  Our comfortable, easy
   suburban lifestyle hasn't killed our basic pioneering spirit.

   ==========================================
   Running for Office in the Land of the Free

   Opponents of the death penalty hold all night vigils before an
   execution.  While there is an outside chance that the media will cover
   their vigil, there is next to no hope that their vigil will belay the
   execution.  But they show up anyway.  Why?  Right to life activists
   congregate outside abortion clinics, risking arrest and imprisonment.
   They will be the first to admit that it's highly unlikely that their
   gatherings will prevent a women from having an abortion or a doctor
   from performing one, but they gather there anyway.  Why?  They do it in
   order to bear witness to the injustice they see and speak out against
   it.  As Thoreau put it, "Say the thing with which you labor."  This is
   an obligation that every moral person has.

   In the same light, I must bear witness to an injustice I've seen first
   hand in my home state of North Carolina.  Good people, sincere and
   honest people, average people like you and me are being prevented from
   participating in North Carolina's electoral process.  "It's unthinkable
   in this day and age!"  you might say; but you would be wrong.  I have
   seen it.

   This misperception stems from the fact that when most people think of
   participating in the electoral process, they think of voting.  And the
   civil rights movement has certainly seen to it that everyone that has
   the slightest inclination to do so has the opportunity to vote.  The
   barriers to voting have been obliterated.  There are no more literacy
   tests.  There are no more qualification criteria.  You don't have to
   even have a permanent home.  The homeless are just as eligible to vote
   as anyone else and there are civic organizations whose purpose is to
   help the homeless register.  Furthermore, there are watchdog
   organizations that keep an eye out for attempts to keep people from
   registering to vote and other obstructionist activity.

   While we have been vigilant about protecting our right to vote, we have
   lost our right to run for and hold elected office.

   We have this romantic notion in our head that, in the United States,
   the land of the free, average citizens can run for office, managing
   their election campaign from their home, raising support from their
   community.  We have this romantic notion that a group of citizens,
   dissatisfied with the policies of our "representatives" can exercise
   their first amendment right to free association, form their own
   political organization, and run for office.  If this was ever true,
   it's no longer true in North Carolina.  Today, unless you are a career
   politician and unless you have the blessings of the political parties
   in the state, it's virtually impossible to run for office or start
   another political party.

   State laws in North Carolina are written to make it very difficult to
   put a candidate on the ballot for statewide offices.  Both independents
   and candidates of new parties have to collect tens of thousands of
   signatures to "qualify" for the ballot.  This is an extremely expensive
   task, most people estimate that it costs at least a dollar a signature
   to collect.  And I have heard rumors that the Ross Perot organization
   has paid as high as $5 per signature in the past.

   There are several reasons why collecting signatures is so expensive.
   First, not all of the signatures a petitioner will collect will be
   valid.  This occurs for several reasons, either the person thinks they
   have registered to vote, but hasn't.  Or the person has recently moved
   and the voter record haven't been updated.  Then general rule of thumb
   is that only about 65%-70% of the signatures actually collected will be
   validated by the boards of election.  Another reason petition drives in
   North Carolina are so expensive is that the law requires that these
   signatures be collected from every county in the state.  So a start up
   organization has to spend lots of money and time traveling around the
   state to make sure signatures are collected from every county.
   Furthermore, state law dictates the wording on the petitions such that
   it sounds like the signer of the petition is actively working on
   organizing the new party or actively supporting the independent
   candidate.  This discourages many people from signing the petition
   because they may want to see the party or independent candidate on the
   ballot, but they may not want to actively work for the candidate.
   Finally, and perhaps most importantly, collecting signatures take
   thousands and thousands of hours of labor.  Hard labor.  Labor that
   could otherwise be directed toward participating in the debates on the
   issues and getting the candidates message out to the people.  And most
   areas that have high amounts of "foot traffic", i.e., people walking by
   on foot, are private property like malls and shopping centers which do
   not permit solicitations on their property.  (And as frustrating as
   that is for petitioners, I can't blame the owners of these places.)

   If you've never worked on a petition campaign, it probably doesn't
   sound like a big deal.  It probably doesn't sound like that much work.
   But I would point out to you that the laws have loop holes written into
   them so that the Democrats and Republicans do not have to endure this
   rite of passage.  That should be proof enough that the requirements are
   an unfair burden.

   So unless you've got a spare couple of hundred thousand dollars to
   devote solely to getting on the ballot in addition to the funds you
   need to actually run a campaign for office, and unless you have a
   statewide network of people who are willing to go door to door
   collecting signatures for you, it's highly unlikely that you, as an
   average citizen, can run for office in North Carolina.

   It's difficult for me to understand why we will not tolerate any
   obstruction to the voting process, but we will tolerate obstructions to
   running for office.  The state laws are defended, of course, by those
   who benefit by them.  In court cases in which North Carolina's ballot
   access laws have been challenged, the state has defended its laws
   saying that the state has a legitimate interest in protecting the
   citizens of North Carolina from "frivolous" candidates and "cluttered"
   ballots.  I have never once heard anyone in North Carolina claim that
   they have "too many" choices on the ballot.  I have never once heard
   anyone complain that a candidate was running a "frivolous" campaign.
   Does this simply mean that the state is doing a good job with these
   laws?  No.  Because all too often, I hear people express dismay at the
   quality of the candidates they can vote for.  Furthermore, many of the
   races in North Carolina go uncontested every year so there is literally
   no choice among candidates for those races.  I have been told that in
   some districts, as many as 30% of the races are won by uncontested
   candidates.  If the ballots in Russia can contain candidates from as
   many as 42 political parties, why can't North Carolina?  If the state
   does in fact, have a legitimate interest in protecting citizens from
   frivolous candidates and cluttered ballots, do they not also have an
   equal interest in ensuring that there are vigorous and meaningful
   election races?  Which is more important, keeping the ballot
   uncluttered and convenient to tabulate by the elections board or
   ensuring that the average citizen can run for office?

   The plain fact of the matter is that North Carolina's election laws are
   written to protect the interests of the major political parties, not
   the interests of North Carolina citizens.  And just like the death
   penalty protestors holding vigil before an execution, and just like
   Right to Life advocates who assemble at abortion clinics, there may not
   be anything we can do about the situation, but we can at least bear
   witness to the injustice.  I urge you to look into the laws where you
   live and find out how difficult it is to run for office in your home
   town.  Do not assume that just because you have the right to vote, you
   also have the right to run for office.

   =====================
   Divorce of the Decade

   I suppose that any publication the purports to comment on cultural
   phenomena is obligated to comment on the fact that Lisa Marie Presely
   has filed for divorce from her husband, Michael Jackson after an 18
   month marriage.

   What does it all mean?  Does this mean that pop music and rock and roll
   are forever incompatable?  Does it show that interracial marrieages are
   unworkable?  Are marriages between high profile celebrities inherently
   doomed?

   I don't think it means anything like that.  I think it just means that
   they didn't love each other.


   ======================
   About Stuck In Traffic

   Stuck In Traffic is a monthly magazine dedicated to independently
   evaluating current events and cultural phenomena.

   Why "Stuck In Traffic"?
   Because getting stuck in traffic is good for you.  It's an opportunity
   to think, ponder, and reflect on all things, from the personal to the
   global.  As Robert Pirsig wrote in _Zen and the Art of Motorcycle
   Maintenance_, "Let's consider a reevaluation of the situation in which
   we assume that the stuckness now ocurring, the zero of consciousness,
   isn't the worst of all possible situations, but the best possible
   situation you could be in.  After all, it's exactly this stuckness that
   Zen Buddhists go to so much trouble to induce...."

   Contact Information:
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   hate-mail about Stuck In Traffic should be sent to Calvin Stacy Powers
   preferably via E-mail ([email protected]) or by mail (2012 Talloway
   Drive, Cary, NC USA 27511).

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   Stuck In Traffic is published and copyrighted by Calvin Stacy Powers
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   Powers.

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