POLYGYNY, CONCUBINES AND THE MODERN OR WESTERN CHRISTIAN WOMAN.

POLYGYNY, CONCUBINES AND THE MODERN OR WESTERN CHRISTIAN WOMAN.

COPYRIGHT � JANUARY 14, 1995 All rights reserved.
Copyright � 01/14/'95; 01/12/�96 (Revised)
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By L. Tyler P.O. Box 620763, SanDiego, CA 92162-0763
[email protected] --- [email protected]

Why would a Western/Occidental woman ever consider polygyny
/concubinage? It is clearly a sin to marry an unsaved person> 104 . She knows she must not marry an unsaved man>105 or a snared-in-sin "saint">106. If a Christian woman in a Western church finds the usual shortage of godly brothers, yet earnestly desires marriage or is commanded to marry>91 she may consider marrying a Christian brother (1) whose �Christian� wife has divorced him exercising her option>107 to be separate and chaste, or (2) who sinfully divorced his �Christian� wife who now will not forgive him or be reconciled to him, exercising her option to be separate and chaste.
[Footnote: >104 (2 Cor. 6 & 7 etc.). >105 (2 Cor. 6:14-7:2). >106 See Appendix five. >91 See Appendix Six. >107 1 Cor 7:10.]

If this Western Christian sister is burning with passion and not successfully controlling her passions and/or imagination consistently, she must marry>92. If she finds herself in repeated defeat morally and spiritually and the only Christian brother who is available or interested is the one who is legally divorced from a Christian wife who wants chaste separation without
reconciliation, the choice to marry in Biblical polygyny would be more
acceptable than continued burning and moral defeats. It is clearly a sin to
marry an unsaved>#5 or backslidden Christian>108 . It is not a sin to
exercise personal liberty in Christ in covenanted polygyny .Yes, the polygyny
of being married to a divorced Christian man who is bound for life to his
former wife who left/ divorced him and refuses to be reconciled to him,
exercising her option of chaste separation.
[Footnote: >92See Appendix Six. >#5 See Appendix #5. >108 (l Cor. 5:11; 2 Thess 3:6,14).]

Would born-again Thusnelda be willing to take the chance of having to share
her preciously rare godly husband with a sister-in-Christ Felicia who had
previously been married to Thusnelda�s husband and who now wants
reconciliation, even if it had to be informal, discreet and private? Can l John
3:17 mean that Thusnelda, who has a godly husband and sees her sister Felicia in marital need now, should not shut up her own heart from Felicia, according to the Love of God abiding in her? Sarai had a need and asked Abraham to become a polygamist. Rachel had a need and asked polygamist Jacob to take her maids as additional wives. Then Leah did the same and the world got the twelve tribes of Israel. A godly wife should not be selfish, seek her own, but should seek the benefit of others>109 and she who is strong should bear the burden of the weak one>110 as the Spirit and peace of God lead. Consider St. Augustine's thought:
[Footnote: >109 (1 Cor l3). >110 (Rom 15).]
�Clearly with the good will of the wife to take another woman, that from her may be born sons common to both, by the sexual intercourse and seed of the one, but by the right and power of the other, was lawful among the ancient fathers: whether it be lawful now also, I would not hastily pronounce....�>n93
[Footnote: >n93 St. Augustin: On The Trinity; p. 406.]

Does the principle of the good Samaritan enter here? Would godly wife �A�
share her godly husband with the needy godly sister "B�, essentially laying
down her own life and denying herself for the other? It is definitely not
natural or carnal. The only precedents I'm aware of are like the one that
involved Ruth, where the widow's need for a husband's care and intimacy to
carry on the blood line was taken up by God and he mandated that the brother, married or not, had to marry her and meet her needs>111 The only similar New Testament passages I know of are the following - - - - - - - - - - -
[Footnote: >111 (Gen. 38: 9,10,11; Deut.25:5-10; Ruth 4:1-11; Matt 22:24ff; Mark 12: 19ff;Lk. 20:28ff).]
MKJV 1 CORINTH. 7: 8 �I say therefore to the unmarried and the widows, It is good for them if they remain even as I. 9 But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn. . . . 36 � But if anyone thinks [it] behaving himself indecently toward his virginity (if he is past [his] prime, and so it ought to be) let him do what he will; he does not sin; let them marry. 37 But [he] who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but who has authority over [his] own will (and has so judged in his heart that he will keep his virginity) he does well. 38 So then he who gives in marriage does well. But he who does not give in marriage does better. 39* � The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband lives, but if her husband is dead, she is at liberty to be remarried to whom she will, only in the Lord.
MKJV 1 TIM. 5: 11 But refuse younger widows, for whenever they grow lustful against Christ, they desire to marry . . .14 Therefore I want the younger ones to marry, bear children, guide the house, giving no occasion to the adversary because of reproach.�

Here the widow is told to remarry in the Lord but she isn't told who to marry in the Lord. 1 John 3:16,17 could enter here with a Christian brother seeing her marital need and marrying her to minister and serve her as husband (like Ruth & Boaz).

Are saints today capable of such mental and Spiritual "self-control" and self
denial? A Spirit filled and Spirit led saint could rise to such a level>112 .
The women described above would be comparable to St. Augustine's man of
the following:
[Footnote: >112(Gal. 5 and Phil. 2:13 + 4:13).]
"But those who have not the virtues of temperance must not be allowed to
judge of the conduct of holy men, any more than those in fever of the
sweetness and wholesomeness of food. . . If our critics, then, wish to attain
not a spurious and affected, but a genuine and sound moral health, let them
find a cure in believing the Scripture record, that THE HONORABLE NAME OF SAINT IS GIVEN NOT WITHOUT REASON TO MEN WHO HAD SEVERAL WIVES; and that the reason is this, that the mind can exercise such control over the flesh as not to allow the appetite implanted in our nature by Providence to go beyond the limits of deliberate intention. . . .the holy patriarchs in their conjugal intercourse were actuated not by the love of pleasure, but by the intelligent desire for the continuance of their family. . . .nor did the number of their wives make the patriarchs licentious. BUT WHY DEFEND THE HUSBANDS, TO WHOSE CHARACTER THE DIVINE WORD BEARS THE HIGHEST TESTIMONY, WHEN IT APPEARS THAT THE WIVES THEMSELVES . . . WHEN THEY FOUND THEMSELVES BARREN, THEY GAVE THEIR HANDMAIDS TO THEIR HUSBANDS; SO THAT WHILE THE HANDMAIDS HAD THE FLESHLY MOTHERHOOD, THE WIVES WERE MOTHERS IN INTENTION .">.n94
[Footnote: >n94 The CAPS are Tyler's. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian Church, Vol. iv; p.290.]

What if he and his wife know a widow or a "sister" abandoned by her unsaved husband who has come under the commands to marry >113 ? They and she cannot find a "brother" for her and she is failing and burning and under the command to marry. Does it become a 1 Jn 3:16,17 situation: [paraphrased] �.He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has a godly husband and sees her sister in need, shuts up her heart from her refusing to share her husband with her in polygyny , how does the Love of God abide in her?� See the following and note that the "brother" is not exempted or excused from this law if he is already married:
[Footnote: >113 1 Cor. 7:9; 1 Th. 4:3,4,5 and 1 Tim. 5:11-14]

MKJV DEUT. 25: 5 � �If brothers live together, and one of them dies and has no child, the wife of the dead shall not marry outside to a stranger. Her
husband's brother shall go in to her and take her as a wife for himself, and
perform the duty of a husband's brother to her. . . 7 And if the man does not
want to take his brother's wife, then let his brother's wife go up to the gate
to the elders and say, My husband's brother refuses to raise up a name in
Israel to his brother. He will not perform my levirate. 8 Then the elders of
his city shall call him and speak to him. And [if] he stands and says, I do not
desire to take her, 9 then his brother's wife shall come to him in the presence
of his elders, and take off his shoe from his foot, and spit in his face, and
shall answer and say, So shall it be done to that man who will not build up his brother's house. 10 And his name shall be called in Israel, The house of him who has his shoe taken off.�

Like the movie, SUBSTITUTE WIFE (Farrah Fawcett), where the wife was dying and knew her husband wouldn't remarry without her intervention, leaving her baby and children motherless, she went out and found a concubine for him and brought her home to him before she died, whom he married and loved after her death at his deceased's request. Like the movie, HEARTS ON FIRE (1992, Lesley Ann Warren, Marg Helgenberger), where the wife was wasting away with muscular dystrophy, needing 24 hour care, and asked her best friend to marry her husband, asked him to marry her, and she had her husband and best friend to stand by her side to the end. An American, a normal woman, could only do such a thing by the grace of God. Genuine unselfish compassionate cherishing can move its practitioner to the heroic, the sublime-------the divine-----and all around are blessed.

TOPICS: FOREVER MARRIAGES CROSS CULTURALLY, FORMAL AND INFORMAL CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE, COMMON LAW MARRIAGE, CHRISTIAN DIVORCE, CHRISTIAN REMARRIAGE, CHRISTIAN CONCUBINES, CHRISTIAN POLYGYNY (POLYGAMY), RACISM, ETHNOCENTRICITY, AND THE SWEARING OF OATHS

TITLE: DIVORCE, REMARRIAGE, CONCUBINES, & JESUS; Another Look for Christians.

COPYRIGHT � JANUARY 14, 1995 All rights reserved.
Copyright � 01/14/'95; 01/12/�96 (Revised)

By L. Tyler P.O. Box 620763, SanDiego, CA 92162-0763
[email protected] --- [email protected]

This work is dedicated with love and honor to Carol Lynn McIntyre of Camelot (3/24/'49), Beverly Landers Tyler(4/11/'52), Keith Adams, Diane Tava Lovelady, Lua Nguyen, Marilyn Tyler (7/27/'49) and Paula Dugas.

It is also dedicated to all those who have suffered through divorce and the complexities of remarriage, and to all of the following:

1. The shattered African polygynist husbands and their families who are made to feel like second class citizens in the local church because of their polygyny, made to feel less loved by Christ and made to feel less a child of God by the local "Christians".

2. The broken hearted Chinese polygynist wives and their children in their local churches who are shunned by the proper members and made to feel less welcome and spiritually inferior because of their polygynous families.

3. The devastated Burmese polygynist husbands who believe in and have received the Lord Jesus Christ, but who are rejected and shunned by the local "Christian" church/leader because they love their wives too much to divorce them.

4. The grieved, stumbled, offended and broken hearted born-again and Spirit sealed Indian wives and children of the born-again and Spirit sealed husband who loved his wives and children too much to renounce and repudiate them in order to be baptized and accepted by the local"Christian' church, and so now live in Christ, denied fellowship by their local congregation of "Christians".

5. The discouraged Mid-Eastern polygynist husbands who genuinely wanted to know Christ and the fellowship of the saints but who were embittered and kept from saving faith by the campaign of "Christian" leaders/churches against them and their polygyny. It would be no surprise if they were the most active in the community in resisting the Gospel and those who preach it. Talk about closing a door and making an enemy of the Gospel!

6. The troubled Liberian polygynist wives and children who genuinely wanted to know Christ and the fellowship of the saints but who were embittered and kept from saving faith by the campaign of "Christian" leaders/churches against them and their polygyny. It would be no surprise if they were the most active in the community in resisting the Gospel and those who preach it. Talk about closing a door and making an enemy of the Gospel!

7. The broken hearted, stumbled, offended and grieved Kenyan polygynist wives and their children whose husbands and fathers were forced to reject and renounce them in order to be baptized and join the local "Christian" church.; especially in the case where a carnal husband used the church rule as an excuse to get rid of a wife and children he didn't want.

8. The disconsolate Pakistani polygynist husbands who are stumbled, grieved, offended and broken in their faith and love for the Lord Jesus Christ because of how badly they and their loved ones have been treated by the local "Christian" leader/church.

9. The grief stricken Bengali polygynist wives and children who are stumbled, grieved, offended and broken in their faith and love for the Lord Jesus Christ because of how badly they and their loved ones have been treated by the local "Christian" leader/church.

10. The miserable Thai polygynist husbands who, with grave doubts and troubled hearts, succumbed to "Christian" pressure to renounce and reject (Malachi 2:13-17) all of their wives except one to satisfy the demands of some misguided "Christian" leader, or association of "Christians".

TABLE OF CONTENTS (These page numbers are correct with Palatino 14 ,left and right margins of 1.25"each, and top and bottom margins at 1" each.
Everybody's computer is potentially different, and if you Select All Font to "clean it up", reducing it to Palatino 12 or Geneva 10, you should probably use Find to find any particular chapter/appendix you are interested in.)
I. INTRODUCTION: PRIORITIES RECONSIDERED. P. 4
II. DIVORCE! A PLAGUE AND ITS CONSEQUENCES. P. 8
III. DIVORCE DEFINED. P. 23
IV. VARIETIES OF MARRIAGE IN THE BIBLE, OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS -- LET THE WORD SPEAK ABOUT POLYGYNY AND CONCUBINES! P. 25
V. WHAT DO CHRISTIAN LEADERS SAY ABOUT CONCUBINES & POLYGYNY? P. 50
VI. ADULTERY DEFINED: A SURPRISE! ISN�T POLYGYNY ADULTERY? P. 66
VII. SO, WHAT ABOUT CONCUBINES & POLYGYNY TODAY IN MY COUNTRY? P. 73
VIII. ARE POLYGYNISTS AND CONCUBINES LIVING IN ERROR TODAY? P. 82
IX. MARRIAGE, CONCUBINES, CIVIL LAW, PERSONAL LIBERTY AND A LOVING CONSCIENCE! P. 87
X. DOES GOD FORGIVE BROKEN VOWS, DIVORCE AND ADULTERY? P. 91
XI. CAN YOU COME BACK TOGETHER & REMMARY AFTER ADULTEROUS REMARRIAGE? P. 99
XII. WHAT ABOUT THE HEALTH QUESTIONS INVOLVED IN SUCH REUNIONS? P. 108
XIII. CAN ADULTERY, DIVORCE, VOWS AND REPENTANCE RESULT IN POLYGYNY/CONCUBINAGE? P. 112
XIV. ADULTERY, DIVORCE, CONCUBINES, POLYGYNY AND THE UNSAVED. P. 119
XV. THE MARRIED MAN WHO WOULD ADD WIVES/CONCUBINES TO HIS "HAREM". P. 121
XVI. ARE POLYGYNY & CONCUBINES OPTIONS FOR THE ABANDONED MAN? P. 126
XVII. POLYGYNISTS, CONCUBINES AND THE LEADERS OF GOD'S PEOPLE. P. 129
XVIII. POLYGYNY & CONCUBINES AND THE WESTERN CHRISTIAN WOMAN. P. 130
XIX. WHAT'S WRONG WITH POLYANDRY? P. 134
XX. HUSBAND RULE OVER THE WIFE? IF SERVANT-TEACHERS RULE .P. 137
XXI. THREE CHEERS FOR MONOGAMY! THE BEST FOR MOST! P. 141
XXII. LISTEN TO THE WORD! P. 145
XXIII. BIBLIOGRAPHY P. 147
APPENDIX ONE -- WHAT ABOUT INTERRACIAL AND INTERETHNIC MARRIAGE? P.150
APPENDIX TWO -- WHAT DO YOU THINK? THE FEEDING OF TWO LEGGED OXEN. P.157
APPENDIX THREE -- A WEDDING COVENANT FOR NONSWEARERS - P. 159
APPENDIX FOUR -- WHAT MAKES A WEDDING/MARRIAGE? - P. 161
APPENDIX FIVE -- MARRYING THE UNSAVED AND "SAINTS" LIVING IN ERROR. - P.163
APPENDIX SIX -- WHEN DO I HAVE TO MARRY? - P. 167
APPENDIX SEVEN -- THE ERRR OF SWEARING, OF OATHS AND SWEARING OATHS. -P.182

XXIII. BIBLIOGRAPHY

>1. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. IV; edited by Philip Schaff (D.d., LL.D.); W.B. Eerdmans
Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>2. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. V; edited by Philip Schaff (D.d., LL.D.); ; W.B. Eerdmans
Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956; p. 267
>3. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. VIII; edited by Philip Schaff (D.d., LL.D.) and Henry Wace (D.D.) ; W.B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>4. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. XIV; edited by Philip Schaff (D.D., LL.D.) and Henry Wace (D.D.) ; W.B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>5. Amplified Bible, The; 1965, Zondervan Publishing House
>6. ANALYTICAL GREEK LEXICON, THE: Harper & Brothers, New York
>7. Arndt & Gingrich: A GREEK-ENGLISH LEXICON OF THE NEW TESTAMENT and Other Early Christian Literature ; By W.F.Arndt & F. W. Gingrich; The Univ. of Chicago Press, Chicago, Ill.; Cambridge at the Univ. Press.; 1957
>8. ASV: The Holy Bible, American Standard Version 1901 & 1929; Thomas
Nelson & Sons, New York
>9. Gold Cord, by Amy Carmichael, Christian Literature Crusade, Fort Worthington, Penna.; London's Society for the Promotion of Christian Knowledge, Holy Trinity Church, Marylebone Rd., N.W. (N.Y. The Macmillan Company).
>10. CUSTOMS AND CULTURES, Anthropology for Christian Missions, by Eugene A. Nida1954, Harper & Brothers, New York
>11. Darby's 1890 translation: Most of the scriptures quoted in this work, if
not otherwise indicated, are from the a modernized version of J. N. Darby's
translation, the OnLine Bible computer program of "Online Bible f ", Ken
Hammil 1-908-741-4298; [E-Mail: [email protected]].
>12. DIVORCE, John Murray, Presbyterian and Reformed Publishing Co. \
>13. G. Duty's book on divorce and remarriage , Downers Grove, Ill.
>14. HASTING'S DICTIONARY OF THE BIBLE; 1989, Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., Peabody, Mass;, Editor James Hastings, DD.,
>15. I LOVED A GIRL; Walter Trobisch, Inter-Varsity Press, Downers Grove, Ill.
>16. INTERNATIONAL BIBLE COMMENTARY, THE; Editor, F.F.Bruce; 1979; Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids Michigan.
>17. Jay Adam's� book on divorce and remarriage
>18. JEWISH: The Holy Scriptures according to the Masoretic Text, 1955, The Jewish Publication Society.
>19. KINSHIP & MARRIAGE, Robin Fox, 1967, Penguin Books, Inc., USA & England
>20. LAMSA: The Holy Bible from Ancient Eastern Manuscripts, 1940, Holman Co., by G. Lamsa.
>21. MARRIAGE EAST AND WEST; David & Vera Mace, 1960, Dolphin Books, Double Day & Co., Inc. Garden City, NY
>22.MARRYING AGAIN; David Hocking, 1977, Fleming H. Revell Co.
>23. MKJV: MODERN KING JAMES VERSION, 1993, by Jay P. Green Sr., in Online Bible 2.5.1; the OnLine Bible computer program of "Online Bible f ", Ken Hammil 1- 908-741-4298; [E-Mail: [email protected]].
>24. MY WIFE MADE ME A POLYGAMIST; Walter Trobisch, 1971, Inter-Varsity Press,
>25. NASB: Holy Bible New American Standard; Broadman & Holman Publishers, Nashville Tenn.; The Lockman Foundation, 1977
>26. NEB: NEW ENGLISH BIBLE, 1970; Oxford/Cambridge University Press
>27. NEW BIBLE DICTIONARY, THE; Editor J.D.Douglas Ph.D; 1962; W. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., Grand Rapids, Mich.
>28. NEW TESTAMENT GREEK FOR BEGINNERS, By, J. Gresham Machen, D.D, Litt. D.,1959
>29. NIV: "Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION. Copyright @ 1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society." Used as required by Zondervan Bible Publishers.
>30. NKJV: New King James Version, 1984, Thomas Nelson, Inc.
>31. OnLine Bible computer program of "Online Bible f ", Ken Hammil 1-908-741-4298; [E-Mail: [email protected]].
>32. PLEASE HELP ME! PLEASE LOVE ME!; Walter Trobisch, Inter-Varsity Press,
>33. St. Augustin: On The Trinity; translated by Arthur West Haddan, B.D.; W.B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>34. Strong�s Lexicon, Open Bible "Online Bible f", Ken Hammil 1-908-741-
4298. Also Baker Book House, Grand Rapids, Mich.
>35. Thayer: Greek English Lexicon of the New Testament; Joseph Henry Thayer, D.D.; American Book Co., New York, 1889
>36. The Septuagint of the Old Testament and Apocrypha With an English
Translation; Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan; 1972;
Samuel Bagster & Sons, Ltd. London
>37. WOMEN'S LIVES IN MEDIEVAL EUROPE - A SOURCEBOOK; Edited by Emile Amt; Routledge, Chapman, Hall; NY, NY; 1993
>38. Wuest's THE NEW TESTAMENT, An Expanded Translation, Kenneth S. Wuest, 1961
>39. YLT; Young's Literal Translation, 1898: OnLine Bible computer program of "Online Bible f ", Ken Hammil 1-908-741-4298; [E-Mail: [email protected]].