TITLE: DIVORCE, REMARRIAGE, CONSEQUENCES, & JESUS;
Another Look for Christians at Adultery, Wedding Vows,
Concubines, Polygyny,  Covenants and Marriage.

COPYRIGHT � JANUARY 14, 1995 All rights reserved.
Copyright � 01/14/'95; 01/12/�96  (Revised)
This file, in its entirety, may be posted on or copied
off of computer networks like Internet or WWW by
anyone so inclined.

By L. Tyler   P.O. Box 620763, SanDiego, CA 92162-
0763

[email protected]   or [email protected]
or [email protected]

This work is dedicated with love and honor to Carol
Lynn McIntyre of Camelot ('49), Beverly
Landers Tyler('52),  Keith Adams, Diane Tava
Lovelady, Lua Nguyen,  Marilyn Tyler ('49) and
Paula Dugas.

It is also dedicated to all those who have suffered
through divorce and the complexities of remarriage,

I. INTRODUCTION: PRIORITIES  RECONSIDERED
       This study is the result of my own marital
experience where I was divorced from my wife and
both of us claimed sincerely and earnestly that we
were born again believers in the Lord Jesus Christ.  I
was faced with the question, "What does a Christian
do about his/her need to marry when in a divorced-
from-one and wanting-to- marrry-another situation,
and he believes that he/she and the Christian exmate
are bound to each other maritally by the Lord until
death parts them?"  Or  ---- "What does a Christian do
in a divorced-from-one and remarried-to-another
situation, and he/she believes that he/she and the
Christian exmate are bound to each other maritally by
the Lord until death parts them?"   And the moral
question: "Is it adultery or is it something else?"

Our relationships with our mates and our children are
second in importance and emotional intensity only to
our relationship with Jesus. In San Diego's Union-
Tribune several months ('95) ago they reported on a
study of the effects of divorce that involved
thousands and lasted over 20 years.  The social
scientists screened the participants so that they had
two groups that basically differed as follows, one
whose parents had divorced or separated and the
other group whose parents did not divorce or
separate.  They found that the average life expectancy
was five years longer for the group whose parents did
not divorce.  Divorce made a five year difference in
the life expectancy of the two groups.

Dr. Griffith Banning conducted a study of 800
Canadian children.
It was reported that their parents' divorce, death or
separation, resulting in the children's felt lack of love
and affection, did greater damage to their growth and
development than disease and all other factors
combined.>a
[>a Love, by Leo Buscaglia, Fawcett Crest,
NY,1972,p.78

What we do with our marital relationships has a
profound effect not only on us, but on our children,
for a lifetime. We already know that a divorce,
statistically, usually results in serious health problems
ranging from ulcers and cardiovascular problems to
hormonal and emotional problems.  Divorce can
devastate us and our loved ones.  How can we afford
to let our marriages, which Jesus intended to arenas
filled with love and testimonies of His life changing
all-sufficiency, become instead arenas of suffering,
bitterness and hatred --- trophies for the enemy of
our souls?

Yet look at the relationship most of us have with our
loved ones and our God.  Most of us live our lives
devoid of the life changing power and compassionate
cherishing of our living and reigning God.  Most of us
are falling short of compassionately cherishing our
mates and children. We wonder why we don�t see the
power of God in our lives.  Yet how can Jesus bless us
miraculously and and powerfully intervene in our
lives when we have let ourselves become so
entangled in the cares and affairs of our daily lives
that the Spirit in us is chocked and rendered fruitless.
It is not just a matter of seeking first the Kingdom of
God and His righteousness, which most of us fall short
of by letting TV or other personal pleasures rob us of
the time we could spend with Jesus.  It goes even
beyond that.

For many of us the question is , �Why is our
relationship with our living and powerful God so
lifeless and embarrassingly weak?�  �Why is there
such a great discrepancy between the the life
changing power of God we believe in, and the
disastisfying mediocrity and ineffectiveness of most
of our lives?�   We know that if we walk in His will
and do those things that are pleasing in His sight, He
hears our prayers and supernaturally intervenes in
our lives (1Jn3:21-24; 5:14,15), so when we fail to
walk in His will and fail to do those things that are
pleasing to Him we should not be surprised at the
spiritually impotent lives and testimonies we have.
What a tragedy to lose the battle for the souls of our
children and loved ones because we stuck with bad or
foolish choices.

Specifically with this study I try to discover and share
what I understand to be His will for us maritally.  I
try to show that an adulterous marriage, an
adulterous remarriage, and or an adulterous divorce
can gut our walk in the power of our God, leaving us
with an impotent and sterile life and testimony that is
bad enough in and of itself; but when you add the
chastening of our God to an impotent and sterile life,
it can be enough to break your heart and spirit.  But
isn�t that why He sends the chastening of weakness
and sickness (1 Cor. 11) or the chastening of poverty,
strife, diseases and animal attacks (Ezek 14) ---- to
break our stiff necks and hard hearts so He, as the
potter, can remake us in our confession and
repentance?  Are you experiencing this chastening?
Do you think it might be due to an ungodly divorce or
marriage?  Do you wonder what you should do about
it?  Please read this study.

This study is written as a wake up call to Christians
who have fallen into marriages, divorces and
remarriages that are contrary to the will of God and
now want to know what they should do.  A child of
God wants to do the will of God (1Jn2:3,4,5).We know
that our God has told us in 1 Pet. 3 that if we fail to
live wisely with our wives, our prayers will be
hindered.   He has told us that in Isaiah 59:1,2 that he
wont hear our prayers if we fall into disobedience and
fail to be Ambassadors of His Love. This study is for
the person who is not sure about the will of God
facing a divorce, marriage or remarriage.    This study
is for the divorced, the married  and the remarried
who find themselves in a situation that neither
affords them the peace nor the joy of the God who
longs to fill their lives with both.  Hopefully this study
will be used of God to shed some light on those
heartbreaking and unfulfilling situations.  Please hear
the Word in this study, and be brave in the Lord to do
His will, no matter what the cost.

       Dear reader, I exhort you to test, try, prove,
examine, scrutinize and check against the Word every
idea or concept in this document that seems
questionable, doubtful or radical.  Stay with what you
understand the Word to say.  What you will read is
where I have arrived in the quest for His will.  It is
very controversial and I believe it is controversial
because I came to this quest as a scholar, an anthro-
pologist and a child of God who earnestly wants to
know his Father's will.  So "Here I stand!" ---- until
further enlightenment from the Father.

This study is based on the understanding of the Word
of God that a godly marriage of two godly people is
for life, and that they are bound by God to each other
maritally until death dissolves the marriage.  It is an
attempt to catch the mind of the God who hates
divorce and who hates the breaking of wedding
covenants.  It is an attempt to understand the marital
will of the God who doesn�t want us to be foolish vow
breaking fools in whom he has no pleasure.  This
document is written from a "Christian", fundamental,
evangelical, dispensationalist, etc. point of view for
those who understand that point of view.   The
followers, or disciples, of Jesus Christ are called
"Christians", and for them loving obedience to their
Lord and King is the paramount issue in all matters of
human life.

What does "Christian" mean?  Who is the God of one
who is called a "Christian"? Jesus is God revealed in
the flesh-blood-bone body, God's only incarnate Son,
physically begotten of the virgin Mary, God's Mediator
of the New Covenant, Savior and Redeemer of all who
obediently believe, King of Kings, Lord of all soon to
return visibly, Creator of all things that have ever
existed (including Michael, Lucifer, Satan, Gabriel),
and Judge of all humans soon to return visibly in His
resurrected flesh and bone body.  What is a
"Christian"? Without controversy the Word is clear
that we are saved and born again Spiritually as a
result of  the following:
       (1) His unearned compassion He had for us even
before we know Him, which compassion moved Him
to give His only begotten Son to bear our sins and die
in our place.
       (2) His enlightening  us about who He is,
convincing us of our sins and His righteous judgment
of sin, and constraining us to accept Him while we are
still spiritually dead in our sins. [John 1:9,12; 16:7-11]
       (3) His giving us the gift of belief/faith in God
(revealed as Jesus Christ, His miraculous birth, His
holy life, His undeserved and substitutionary death,
and His resurrection demonstrating His victory over
death and sin) in spite of our spiritual blindness and
death [James 1:17]
       (4) Our willingness >1  to accept and use His gift
of belief is met with His enabling >2 us to have and
exercise genuine faith in Him as our King, God and
Savior in every area of our life.
[>1  2 Corinth. 8.; >2  Phil. 2:13; 4:13.]
       (5) Since all our righteousnesses are as filthy
rags there is no work or deed that we can do to earn
God�s salvation.  Our part is to genuinely believe in,
accept  and submit to His gracious gift in Jesus Christ.

       Okay, so that is what a Christian is . What�s
next? I believe that it is obvious that a Christian
should not lean to his  own understanding>3   and
should not just do that which seems right to
himself>4.   I believe that those who are born of God
are led by the Spirit of God Spiritually>5 and by the
Word>6  I believe that the believer must acknowledge
Christ's Lordship in
every area of his/her life for Christ to be the real and
actual LORD/KING of that believer>7.  I agree with the
Bible that a Christian's obedience is his birthmark, the
vital and critical proof of having been truly born
again of God>8 .  Besides all of that, Jesus said that if I
loved Him, I would obey Him, showing my love by my
obedience>9 so of course I want to show my love for
Him and show proof of my rebirth in Him by obeying
Him.
[Footnotes:>3 Prov. 3:5,6;    >4   Prov. 16:24;     >5
Romans 8:13,14.;     >6  Psalm 119:9,11,24,32,72,89,
93,101, 104,105 ,166,167;    >7  Prov. 3:5,6; Romans
12:1,2; 1 Cor. 6:19, 20 etc;       >8 (1John 2:3,4,5; 3:10,
24; 5:2,3; Hebrews 5:8,9);    >9   (John 14:15,21).]

Yes, I realize that obeying Him is not necessarily
obeying Christian leaders and teachers because if they
teach the traditions and commandments of men>10
instead of or along with the commandments and
traditions of God, they make the Way of God null, void
and ineffective.  Yes, I know that God can use godly
men and Christian leaders/teachers to show us His
Way>11  but surely it is our responsibility to be  like
the Bereans>12, testing-trying-examining-
scrutinizing>13  all of their teachings and leadership
to see if it conforms to the Word of God, holding fast
to what we find to be true/good. We need to
diligently search the Word to find the will of God,
especially in the matter of controversial and
questionable things.
[Footnotes:>10  (Matthew 15:1-9; Mark 7:1-15);
>11  (Hebrews 13:7;    >12 of Acts 17:11.31;       >13 1
John4:1-4 and 1 Thess. 5:21.]

       Finally, why does God allow us to experience
such heart breaking and soul-rending experiences as
those that accompany divorce, separation, and
adultery?  Please consider the point about 1 Cor.
10:13.  He doesn't allow you to be tried more than you
can bear, because you are stronger, have a better
understanding of spiritual warfare and a deeper faith,
the trials will be greater--but never more than you
can bear.  Consider the  trials of John the Baptist and
all the apostles except John.  They all died violent
deaths at the hands of those who hate them, but
never more than they could bear.  An exercise is no
exercise if it doesn't challenge  you at the point where
you have to strain and go aerobic, sometimes  painful.
The same with "spiritual" muscles, the trial has  to
produce stress, strain and even pain for you to
become stronger, more capable, more useful and
fruitful.  The fruitful vine looks terrible when it is
pruned, and it would feel terrible if it could feel, but
because it is pruned it has the potential of being more
fruitful, and I know you want more fruit of the Spirit
in your life.  I know that you want to compassionately
cherish God and others even  more than you do now,
and that's how you get there.
       This life is boot camp and the war, which, thank
God, is shortened for our sakes.  Our resurrected life
with Jesus Christ is worth the struggle.  To rule the
earth with Him enthroned in Jerusalem for a 1000
years (Rev. 20: 2-7),  to walk around as His agents
enabled to raise the dead, open the eyes of the blind,
to bind up the broken limbs and hearts, to counsel the
broken hearted with wisdom inspired of God, to feed
the hungry, to clothe the naked, to teach in power the
lost how they can be found  etc etc etc etc.  I can
hardly wait!
       Please consider attending a Christian
divorce/grief recovery support group.  You are still
deeply grieving inside over your ex and those "saints"
that so deeply and carnally broke your heart.  I know
that I desperately needed and greatly benefited from
the free one I attended at Del Cerro So. Bapt. Church.
It was critical in my recovery and in my readiness to
be healed and in my learning how and where I
needed to grow, to  forgive my ex, and to prepare my
heart for my next.  Most denominations have free
support groups that are usually extremely helpful, it
taught by qualified staff and anointed of the Lord.
Please call around for times and places and pray
about attending and let the Lord minister to you
through the  saints.
       But  why does He allow us to suffer, to grieve so
deeply and have hearts so broken than you can feel
the  pain throughout your chest?  Here are some
reasons that I have become aware of and they are all
for our good. Please consider them and, in each, ask if
its goal was  accomplished in your life.
       WE HAVE SUFFERED ----
       1. So that we can know that we belong to Christ.
2 Tim 3:12; 1 Pet. 2:19,20; Mat. 13:21,22,23
       2. Because we are followers of Christ. John
15:19,20
       3. So that evil doers will not come to God just to
escape from Hell and suffering in this life. He wants
sinners to come to Him because they love Him who
first loved them, not because they forgot to join the
Noah's Ark Club. Noah's flood + Rev. 21:27
       4. So that we wont miss (be homesick, want to
look/go back like Lot's wife did) this social system
when we are in Heaven or ruling with Christ.  To love
the world's social system is to be God's enemy. 1 John
2:15; Heb. 11:l3- 19.
       5. So that we can know how and why to choose-
between the good and the evil. Deut. 30:15-20
       6. Because of our own sins. 1 Cor. 5 and 1 Cor.
11:30- 32; Hebrews 12.
       7. To cause us to learn to be humble. 2 Cor.
12:7-10
       8. To caution us against arrogant or ignorant
presumption in our prayers and to exhibit to us His
all-sufficiency in the affairs of our personal lives. 2
Cor.12: 7-10; Rom5:3,4
       9. To learn and acquire patience, experience and
hope  in the compassionate cherishing of God. Rom.
5:3,4
       10.  Because of His Name- Because of His Truth -
Because of His Life - Because of the shining Light of
His Truth, an honor to be counted worthy of suffering
with and for Him if God permits.  Acts 5:41; Rom 8:17
       11.  So that we may have the honor of being
glorified  together with Him. Rom. 8:17
       12. So that we may be perfected, completed, and
matured.   Heb. 2:10; 1 Pet. 5:10
       13. So that we may learn to Love Jesus and His
Way enough to obey Him even when it hurts. Heb.
5:8,9; Psalm  15:4
       14.  So that we may be established,
strengthened and  settled in Christ. 1  Peter 5:10
       15. Because they hated and killed Jesus they
will hate and try to kill the Jesus in us. Lk. 6:22; John
15:18,19
       16. To end the cycle of hate and violence in our
lives at us, we being shock absorbers for the evil
around us, so that it will stop at us and we will learn
not to pass it on.  He has called us to turn the cheek,
go the second mile and bless and pray for those who
curse and abuse us. Matt. 5;  Luke 6; Romans 12; 1
Cor. 6
       17. So that our enduring and genuine faith may
bring praise, honor and glory at His appearing in the
presence of all the angels, demons, cherubim,
seraphim and those with  Christ. 1 Pet. 1:7
       18. So that we could experience God's solutions
and faithfulness and comfort for our griefs and trials
so  we will have learned how to share His comforting
solutions with the others He leads us to who are
experiencing similar grievous trials.  It is preparation
for ministry now and  in the 1000 year reign of Christ
on earth. 2 Cor. 1:3-5 ; Revelation20:1-6


II.  DIVORCE!  A PLAGUE  AND  ITS  CONSEQUENCES .
St. Augustine (4th Cent AD) had a powerful way of
stating the permanent nature of the marriage of two
who married after being born again, lovingly obedient
to Jesus and fruitful in the Spirit---
       �To such a degree is that marriage compact
entered upon a matter of a certain sacrament, that it
is not made void even by separation itself, since, so
long as her husband lives, even by whom she hath
been left, she commits adultery, in case she be
married to another: and he who hath left her, is the
cause of this evil. . . Seeing that the compact of
marriage is not done away by divorce intervening; so
that they continue wedded persons one to another,
even after separation; and commit adultery with
those, with whom they shall be joined, even after
their own divorce, either the woman with a man, or
the man with a woman. . . But a marriage once for all
entered upon in the City of our god>14,  where, even
from the first union of the two, the man and the
woman, marriage bears a certain sacramental
character, can no way be dissolved but by the death
of one of them. . . Therefore the good of marriage
throughout all nations and all men stands in the
occasion of begetting, and  faith of chastity: but, so far
as pertains unto the People of God, also in the sanctity
of the sacrament, by reason of which it is unlawful for
one who leaves her husband, even when she has been
put away, to be married to another, so long as her
husband lives, no not even for the sake of bearing
children:  . . . not even where that very thing,
wherefore it takes place, follows not, is the marriage
bond loosed, save by the death of the husband or
wife.�>15
[Footnotes:>14 This footnote mark etc. is not St.
Augustine's or Arthur Haddan's.  I insert it just in
case the reader is not aware of the fact that all
marriages between real saints take place "in the City
of our god" not according to St. Augustine, but
according the the Holy Spirit in Hebrews 11:10,13-19,
where they are already seated with Christ in the
Heavenlies according to Eph. 1 & 2.        >15  St.
Augustin: On The Trinity;  pp. 402, 406, 412.]

In Matt. 5 Jesus made it plain divorce was permitted
for the hardness of human hearts and Malachi 2
makes it plain that God hates the treacherous
breaking of marital covenants that results in divorce.
In Matt. 5  Jesus permits the husband to divorce his
wife is she is guilty of  fornication, but does not
command it.  There is no command to divorce one's
mate for fornication, but after Acts 1 there is the
command to separate (not divorce) yourself from a
saved mate who is snared in sexual sin>16.   Before
Acts 1 Jesus allowed divorce for the  hardness of
hearts >17.  The compassionate heart of the Spirit
filled Christian would respond to a mate's fornication
according to the Word>18. .  The goal of such
compassion for one's mate snared in sexual sin would
be the goal of  godly sorrow described in the
following:2 Cor. 7 and 1 Corinthians 5:5  . . . deliver
such an one unto Satan for the destruction [ruin ,
damage] of the flesh, so that the spirit may be saved
in the day of the Lord Jesus.
[Footnotes:>16.  1 Cor. 5:9-11; 2 Thes. 3:6-14; 1 Tim.
6:1-5; 2 Tim. 3:1-5;      >17.  Mat. 19:6-9;    >18. 1
Corinth. 5:5-11; Matthew 18:15-18; Gal. 6:1; John 8: 1-
10; 1 Tim. 5:20,21; 2 Th. 3:6-14]

MKJV 2 CORINTHIANS 2: 5 � 6 This punishment by
the majority [is] enough for such a one; 7 so that, on
the contrary, you should rather forgive and comfort
[him], lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up
with overwhelming sorrow.  8 So I beseech you to
confirm [your] love toward him.  9 For to this end I
also wrote, that I might know the proof of you,
whether you are obedient in all things. 10 But to
whom you forgive anything, I also [forgive]. For if I
forgave anything, for your sakes I forgave [it] to him
in the person of Christ; 11 so that we should not be
overreached by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his
devices.
MKJV 2 CORINTHIANS 7: 8 For even if I grieved you
in the letter, I do not regret; if indeed I did regret; for
I see that that letter grieved you for an hour.  9 Now I
rejoice, not that you were grieved, but that you
grieved to repentance. For you were grieved
according to God, so that you might suffer loss by
nothing in us. 10 For the grief according to God works
repentance to salvation, not to be regretted, but the
grief of the world works out death. 11 For behold this
same thing (you being grieved according to God); how
much it worked out earnestness in you; but [also]
defense; but [also] indignation; but [also] fear; but
[also] desire; but [also] zeal; but [also] vengeance! In
everything you approved yourselves to be clear in the
matter. 12 � Then, though I wrote to you, [it was] not
on account of the one who did wrong, nor on account
of the one who suffered wrong, but for the sake of
revealing our earnestness on your behalf, for you
before God.

Even though Jesus apparently allows a genuinely
believing husband to divorce his wife snared in
adultery and then go ahead and remarry, I wouldn't
want to stand before the judgment seat of Christ and
tell the God of Love I divorced my wife for fornication
because of the hardness of my heart.  The motivation
of a hardened heart doesn't square with Eph. 4 or I
Cor. 13 or Romans 15.
MKJV EPHES. 4: 15 But that you, speaking the truth in
love, may in all things grow up to Him who is the
Head, [even] Christ;  . . 25 Therefore putting away
lying, let each man speak truth with his neighbor, for
we are members of one another.  26 Be angry, and do
not sin. Do not let the sun go down upon your wrath,
27 neither give place to the Devil.  . . . 30 And do not
grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you are sealed
until [the] day of redemption.  31 Let all bitterness
and wrath and anger and tumult and evil speaking be
put away from you, with all malice.  32 And be kind
to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another,
even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you.
1 CORINTH. 13: 4 � Compassionate cherishing has
patience, is kind;  compassionate cherishing is not
envious, is not vain, is not puffed up; 5 does not
behave indecently, does not seek its own, is not easily
provoked, thinks no evil.  6 Charity does not rejoice in
unrighteousness, but rejoices in the truth, 7 quietly
covers all things, believes all things, hopes all things,
endures all things.  8 � Compassionate cherishing
never fails.
MKJV ROMANS 15: 1 � Then we who are strong ought
to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please
ourselves.  2 Let every one of us please [his] neighbor
for [his] good, to building up.   3 For even Christ did
not please Himself; but as it is written, "The
reproaches of those who reproached You fell on Me."
4 For whatever things were written before were
written for our learning, so that we through patience
and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.  5 �
And may the God of patience and consolation grant
you to be like minded toward one another according
to Christ Jesus,  6 so that with one mind [and] one
mouth you may glorify God, even the Father of our
Lord Jesus Christ. 7 � Therefore receive one another
as Christ also received us, to [the] glory of God.

Being forgiven by God for sins worthy of death (Rom.
1) how can we not forgive our mate if he/she falls in
adultery and then repents?  How can we say anything
besides "Go on with your life and sin no more!">19 if
the Godly repentance described in the following is
evident?  That's the example He left for us
(1Pet.2:20,21).  There is no greater Love than to lay
down and deny your life/will for another's good.
[>19.  John 8:1-10.]
MKJV 2 CORINTHIANS 7: 8 For even if I grieved you
in the letter, I do not regret; if indeed I did regret; for
I see that that letter grieved you for an hour.  9 Now I
rejoice, not that you were grieved, but that you
grieved to repentance. For you were grieved
according to God, so that you might suffer loss by
nothing in us.10 For the grief according to God works
repentance to salvation, not to be regretted, but the
grief of the world works out death. 11 For behold this
same thing (you being grieved according to God); how
much it worked out earnestness in you; but [also]
defense; but [also] indignation; but [also] fear; but
[also] desire; but [also] zeal; but [also] vengeance! In
everything you approved yourselves to be clear in the
matter.
MKJV 2 CORINTHIANS 2:  6 This punishment by the
majority [is] enough for such a one; 7 so that, on the
contrary, you should rather forgive and comfort [him],
lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up with
overwhelming sorrow.  8 So I beseech you to confirm
[your] love toward him. 9 For to this end I also wrote,
that I might know the proof of you, whether you are
obedient in all things. 10 But to whom you forgive
anything, I also [forgive]. For if I forgave anything, for
your sakes I forgave [it] to him in the person of Christ;
11 so that we should not be overreached by Satan, for
we are not ignorant of his devices.

When I have approached Christian leaders here in my
area, most of them fall back on a rationalization of
scripture to defend or at least conform to the worldly
norms of separation/divorce/ remarriage in
contemporary society.   So they accept divorces,
where those put together by God are put apart by
man, and remarry "believers" who have been
divorced or separated from "believers". They are
sincerely and earnestly  concerned about stumbling
the weak and are reluctant to ask of the saints what
seems to the world's eyes to be impossible for many
saints, to accept the Word that genuine believers are
bound maritally as long as both live.

The particular case in point is the situation caused by
the plague of divorce among Christians.  I  understand
the following scriptures to indicate that genuine
believers in the Lord Jesus Christ who were free to
marry each other in the Lord and did marry each
other are bound maritally to each other as long as
both live -------
1 CORINTH. 7:10* � And to the married I command
(not I, but the Lord), a woman not to be separated
from [her] husband.  11* But if she is indeed
separated, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled
to [her] husband. And a husband is not to leave [his]
wife. 12 But to the rest I speak, not the Lord, If any
brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is
pleased to dwell with him, do not let him put her
away.  13 And the woman who has a husband who
does not believe, if he is pleased to dwell with her, do
not let her leave him. . . .15 But if the unbelieving one
separates, let [them] be separated. A brother or a
sister is not in bondage in such [cases], but God has
called us in peace.   39* � The wife is bound by the
law as long as her husband lives, but if her husband is
dead, she is at liberty to be remarried to whom she
will, only in the Lord.
MKJV ROMANS 7: 2* For the married woman was
bound by law to the living husband. But if the
husband is dead, she is set free from the law of [her]
husband.  3* So then [if], while [her] husband lives,
she is married to another man, she shall be called an
adulteress. But if the husband dies, she is free from
the law, [so that] she is no adulteress by becoming
another man's wife.
MKJV MARK 10: 6 But from the beginning of the
creation God made them male and female. 7 For this
cause a man shall leave his father and mother and
shall cleave to his wife.  8 And the two of them shall
be one flesh. So then they are no longer two, but one
flesh.  9 Therefore what God has joined together, let
not man put apart.   . . . 11 And He said to them,
Whoever shall put away his wife and marries another
commits adultery against her. 12 And if a woman
shall put away her husband and marries to another,
she commits adultery.

I believe they state that a Spiritually reborn man and
a Spiritually reborn woman who are free to marry
each other in the Lord and do marry each other are
bound to each other by the Word of the Lord as long
as both their bodies are alive.  What is the case in the
Bible?
Gen. 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and
his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife, and they
shall be one flesh.>20.  There are three acts described
here:
[Footnote>.(20. The Holy Scriptures According to the
Masoretic Text]

(1) From the following it is clear that it means leaving
the parents' presence, authority and control;
MKJV PSALM 45:10 � Listen, O daughter, and look;
and bow down your ear; and forget your own people
and your father's house. 11 And cause the King
greatly to desire your beauty, for He [is] your Lord,
and you shall worship Him. . . . 13 The king's daughter
[is] all glorious within; her clothing [is] trimmed with
gold. . . . 16 Your sons shall be in the place of your
fathers; you will make them princes in all the land. 17
I will make Your name to be remembered in all
generations; therefore the people shall praise You
forever and ever.

(2) Cleaving is the act of the will making marital
covenants and vows that bind them maritally  before
God>21;
[Footnote:>21  Ezekisl 16:7,8; Malachi 2; Matt. 1:18-25
where Mary and Joseph are declared to be husband
and wife even before the actual wedding and
cohabitation.   "Cleave" in the Hebrew means "cling or
adhere;  . . . abide fast, cleave (fast together), follow
close (hard after), be joined (together), keep (fast),
overtake, pursue hard, stick, take." (Strong''s
Exhaustive Concordance.)  J. Thayer's Greek-English
Lexicon says it means "to glue upon, glue to" ]

(3) Becoming one flesh is the sexual act of coitis or
sexual penetratio and one can become one flesh with
one's wife or with an adulteress or with a harlot>22.
Becoming one flesh is not what makes a relationship a
marriage. For the permanence of the relationship of
marriage the focus is on the word "cleave" which in
the Hebrew means "cling or adhere;  . . . abide fast,
cleave (fast together), follow close (hard after), be
joined (together), keep (fast), overtake, pursue hard,
stick, take.">23.  Thayer says it means "to glue upon,
glue to">24. If God commands the husband to conduct
himself as if he were being joined together with her,
clinging, adhering, cleaving and glued to her in this
manner towards his wife, then he had better do it if
he wants a good future with God, because to disobey
would be death>25 . Being under this command would
certainly bind a man to his wife as long as both lived.
[Footnotes:>22  1 Cor. 6:13-20;    >23.  Strong''s
Exhaustive Concordance;    >24. Greek English Lexicon
of the New Testament; Joseph Henry Thayer, D.D.;
American Book Co., New York, 1889;
>25  Rom. 6:23; 1:31,32; Malachi 2:14-17.]

The Jewish Septuagint (third century B.C.) for Gen.
2:24 uses the same word for "cleave" that Jesus uses
in Matt. 19:5.  The word used for cleave in the LXX's
Gen. 2:24 and Jesus' Matt. 19:5 means the following: 1.
According to Thayer --- "to join one's self to closely,
cleave to, stick to"; and 2. According to Arndt &
Gingrich ---"adhere closely to, be faithfully devoted
to, join tini  someone".   The Greek tense in both is
future indicative passive which means that this is
what they shall have themselves doing in the future
on a regular basis.  Some say that it is not a command.
Jesus seems to differ with them both in Malachi 2,
where He says the husband who breaks his marital
agreement with his wife is under His wrath, and in
Matt 19:6 where Jesus says "So then, they are no
longer two but one flesh.  Therefore what God has
joined together, man must not separate."
It is the marital commitments and covenants between
the husband and wife that is the glue that binds them,
and it is the solemn and disciplined honoring of those
commitments that reinforces and maintins that glued
bond that binds them.

Every legal>26 and moral>27 marriage of two who are
morally free in Christ to marry is ordained or allowed
by God and takes place under His control>b, so indeed
God has joined them, based on the truth of the
following:
[Footnote: >26 Legal= recognized and accepted as legal
by one's culture and law enforcers Rom. 13; 1 Pet.
2:13-17;       >27 moral= free from all others maritally
and free in the Lord's kingdom to marry according to
His Word.     >b Eph. 1:11; Rom. 8:28]

MKJV Romans 8: 27 And He searching the hearts
knows what [is] the mind of the Spirit, because He
makes intercession for the saints according to [the will
of] God.  28 And we know that all things work
together for good to those who love God, to those who
are called according to [His] purpose.
MKJV ROMANS 13: 1 � Let every soul be subject to
the higher authorities. For there is no authority but of
God; the authorities that exist are ordained by God.  2
So that the one resisting the authority resists the
ordinance of God . . .
MKJV Ephes. 1:10. . .  to head up all things in Christ,
both the things in Heaven, and the things on earth,
[even] in Him,  11 in whom also we have been chosen
to an inheritance, being predestinated according to
the purpose of Him who works all things according to
the counsel of His own will, . . .

That's why we can trust God that we are to remain
married to the person we are married to when we are
saved.   He gave Adam his Eve, and if you are His
child, He worked in you to want to marry your
mate>c, He lead you to marry your mate>d, and He
worked all things so that you did marry you mate>e.
So you can understand why 1 Cor. 7 speaks of the
binding nature of marriage.
[>c  Phil. 2:12,13; Heb.13:20,21.     >d Romans 8:9,14;
Acts 16:6,7; Isa. 30:21.      >e  Eph. 1:11; Rom. 8:28; Mt.
10:29; Prov. 16:1,9; Isa. 46:9-13; Neh. 9:6]
MKJV 1 CORINTHIANS 7:17 � But as God has
distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each
one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all churches.
18 [Was] any called having been circumcised? Do not
be uncircumcised. Was anyone called in
uncircumcision? Do not be circumcised. . . . 20 Let
each one remain in the calling in which he was called.
21 Were you called as a slave? It does not matter to
you, but if you are able to become free, use [it] rather.
. . 24 Each in whatever way he was called, brothers,
in this remain with God.

So Jesus makes binding>28 the cleaving >29 and the
one flesh experience that we know as marriage.  Since
the only terms of divorce are given in Deut 24:1-4
(which were superseded by Matt. 19:1-15 and 1 Cor.
7:10-15,39), it is clear that marriage is a life long
relationship based on the covenants of the couple and
on God's command not to be put asunder or put
asunder the relationship.  Rather than abide by this
believers-married-for-life principle, most  Christian
churches/ pastors  today  are telling their divorced
and divorcing communicants that they should forget
the things that have happened in the past trusting
God's forgiveness to cover it all and press on into the
future with their new mates and lives.
[Footnotes:>28 (Mt. 19:6); >29  (Mt. 19:5) ]

They say it would do more harm than good to tell
Christian mates that they need to leave their new
mates, married in adultery, and new kids and go back
to the Christian mates they divorced contrary to the
Word>f.  I believe that we are to live by every Word
of God, and not by unscriptural traditions of men that
put asunder what God said must not be put asunder,
that tell couples they are loosed from each other
when God says they are bound for life>30 .  How dare
we say "You are loosed" when God Himself says she is
"bound as long as her husband lives"?
[Footnotes:>f  in 1 Corinth. 7; Romans 7 and Mark 10
>30  (Matt. 19:5; Rom. 7:1-5; 1 Cor. 7:10,11,39)]

What are the responsibilities of still being bound to
someone when you have loosed yourself  according to
human law but remain bound  according to the Law of
Christ? Wouldn't they  be responsible for parenting
both their children by the mates to whom they are
bound by the Lord, as well as their children by their
adulterous>31 new marriage.   Wouldn't they  be
responsible for keeping whatever promises they
made and can keep in the Lord--that they made to
their mates in the Lord and to their mates in
adultery>32 ?  They can't keep their adulterous
promises of marital intimacy with their adulterous
mates, but they can keep the promise to Agap� Love
them, cherish them, honor and respect them, pray and
fast earnestly and fervently for them, and clothe and
feed them if they are destitute and in need.  Jesus
instructs us to do these things even to our enemies>g.
There is no question that they are responsible for the
parenting, provision and care of any children by their
adultery, as God and man's law allow(Eph. 6; 1 Tim.
5:8; Heb. 12; 1Jn.3:16,17).
[Footnotes:>31. Mark 10:11,12;       >32   (Psalm 15:4;
Ezek. 17:15;Eccles.5:1-7)    >g Luke 6; Mt 5; Isa. 59; 1
tim. 2; James 2; 1 Peter 2,3,4]

I  submit that the commandment of God in Romans
7:1-3 and the following passage below (binding the
saved husband to his saved wife until death separates
them) is laid aside to hold man�s tradition, making of
no effect the Word of God.:
MKJV MARK 10:6 But from the beginning of the
creation God made them male and female. 7 For this
cause a man shall leave his father and mother and
shall cleave to his wife. 8 And the two of them shall
be one flesh. So then they are no longer two, but one
flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let
not man put apart. . . . 11 And He said to them,
Whoever shall put away his wife and marries another
commits adultery against her. 12 And if a woman
shall put away her husband and marries to another,
she commits adultery.
MKJV 1 CORINTH. 7: 4 The wife does not have
authority over [her] own body, but the husband. And
likewise also the husband does not have power [over
his] own body, but the wife.  5 Do not deprive one
another, unless [it is] with consent for a time, so that
you may [give yourselves to] fasting and prayer. And
come together again so that Satan does not tempt you
for your incontinence. . . . 7 For I would that all men
were even as I myself am. But each has his proper
gift from God, one according to this manner and
another according to that.  8 I say therefore to the
unmarried and the widows, It is good for them if they
remain even as I.   9 But if they do not have self-
control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than
to burn.  10* � And to the married I command (not I,
but the Lord), a woman not to be separated from [her]
husband.  11* But if she is indeed separated, let her
remain unmarried, or be reconciled to [her] husband.
And a husband is not to leave [his] wife. . . . 39* � The
wife is bound by the law as long as her husband lives,
but if her husband is dead, she is at liberty to be
remarried to whom she will, only in the Lord.

I submit that those  passages mean exactly what they
say, that the obediently believing wife is bound by
law as long as her obediently believing husband lives.
No qualifiers!  No exemptions!  Instead many
Christian leaders tell the saved divorced that if they
just confess the sin of the divorce to God, God will
forgive them and they are no longer bound to their
departed saved mate so they can go on and remarry
someone new.  So they set aside God�s command to
keep their own tradition.  Can God bless and anoint
with His miraculous power a person, a couple or a
church sets aside His will and Word so they can keep
their own tradition?  Not the Jesus I know.

Yes Jesus allowed  the Jews under Moses to divorce
their mates (Mt. 5)  but it was for the hardness of
their hearts and you can be sure that a just and holy
God chastened the hard of heart.  If I were an insurer,
I sure wouldn't want to sell them any life insurance
(1Cor.10).  He never commanded a genuine believer to
divorce a genuine believer.  It just is not in the Word.
He never commands His child to divorce His other
child after He has put them together.  But there is a
commanded separation or standing back or break in
fellowship that is required by Jesus when one's mate
is snared in the sins described below ----- not a
divorce, but some form of separation.  Consider the
following about sinners (for those married to the
unsaved) and about  "saints" snared in sin:
MATTHEW 5: 32* But I say to you that whoever shall
put away his wife, except for the cause of fornication,
causes her to commit adultery. And whoever shall
marry her who is put away commits adultery.
Romans 16: 17. . .  mark them who cause divisions
and causes of offense contrary to the doctrine  which
you have learned, and avoid them.
1 Timothy 6:1-5 If any man. . . . consent not to . . . .
the Words of our Lord Jesus . . . withdraw  yourself
from such.
2 Timothy 3:1-5: For men shall be lovers of their own
selves.........avoid such.
1 CORINTH. 5: 9 � I wrote to you in the letter not to
associate intimately with fornicators; 10 yet not
altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with
the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for
then you must go out of the world.  11 But now I have
written to you not to associate intimately, if any man
called a brother [and is] either a fornicator, or
covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or
an extortioner; with such a one not to eat.
2 THESSALONIANS 3:6 � Now we command you,
brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that
you withdraw yourselves from every brother who
walks disorderly, and not after the teaching which he
received from us. . . .  14 And if anyone does not obey
our word by this letter, mark that one and have no
company with him, that he may be ashamed. 15 Yet
do not count [him] as an enemy, but admonish him as
a brother.

Yes there is an avoiding or withdrawing from such
spouses but we will see below how  1 Cor. 7:10-15
and Mark 10 etc. exclude the option of marital
separation or divorce except under very specific
conditions.  He never said that they were no longer
bound to each other as Christian husband and
Christian wife according to the scriptures>33 .  You
and I know that a married couple can avoid or
withdraw from each other in many ways without
getting a divorce.  They withdraw emotionally  or
socially.  A  saint can't join the sinning spouse in the
sin, so right there is a withdrawal or avoidance.
[Footnote: >33   (Matt. 19:5; Rom. 7:1-5;  1 Cor.
7:10,11,15,39)]

According to 1 Cor. 5 it is a whole different ball game
if the spouse is  often doing, practicing, regularly or
habitually doing any of the following: adultery,
fornication, sexual perversion (sodomy,
homosexuality, bestiality, incest), greediness or
covetousness, the worship of false gods, reviling
(verbal abuse), drunkeness or intoxication, robbing,
swindling, and/or extorting.  The saved spouse is
under command NOT to associate, keep company or be
intimate with a spouse who does the above and is
claiming to be genuinely saved, a genuine believer in
the Lord Jesus Christ, a born again child of God.  This
may take the form of the husband divorcing such a
"believing" wife and remarrying (Matt: 19:9) or it may
take the form of the wife chastely and maritally
separating herself from such a "believing" spouse (1
Cor. 7:10,11).  The reason for this difference in options
will be discussed in the chapter dealing with adultery
and its definition.

I believe the saved wife of an unsaved husband, who
is involved in the sins listed above in this section, has
the same chaste separation option, from the context of
1 Cor. 7:10-15.  I understand this kind of separation
from such sinning mates involves the cessation of
sexual intimacy, until either the sinning spouse
repents as in 2 Cor 2 &  7 or the Lord takes the life of
the sinning spouse so as to save his spirit.

Let's take another look at this.  What do you do about
your spouse who is snared in adultery, fornication,
lesbianism, sodomy, bestiality, incest or etc.? Consider
the following:
MKJV JOHN 8: 4 they said to Him, Teacher, this woman
was taken in adultery, in the very act. 5 Now Moses in
the law commanded us that such should be stoned.
You, then, what do you say? . . . 7 But as they
continued to ask Him, He lifted Himself up and said to
them, He who is without sin among you, let him cast
the first stone at her. . . .
       MATT.5:32* But I say to you that whoever shall
put away his    wife, except for the cause of
fornication, causes her to commit       adultery.       And
whoever shall marry her who is put away
       commits adultery.
9 And hearing, and being convicted by conscience,
they went out one by one, beginning at the oldest,
until the last. And Jesus was left alone, and the
woman standing in the midst. 10. . . Did not one give
judgment against you? 11 And she said, No one, Lord.
And Jesus said to her, Neither do I give judgment. Go,
and sin no more.
MKJV 1 CORINTH. 5: 1 � Everywhere [it is] reported
[that there is] fornication among you, and such
fornication as is not named among the nations, so as
one to have [his] father's wife. . . . 3 For as being
absent in body but present in spirit, I indeed have
judged already [as though I were] present
[concerning] him who worked out this thing; 4 in the
name of our Lord Jesus Christ, when you are gathered
together, with my spirit; also, with the power of our
Lord Jesus Christ; 5 to deliver such a one to Satan for
the destruction of the flesh, so that the spirit may be
saved in the day of the Lord Jesus. . . .
        MATT. 5:32* But I say to you that whoever
shall put away his      wife, except for the cause of
fornication, causes her to commit       adultery.       And
whoever shall marry her who is put away
       commits adultery.
7 � Therefore purge out the old leaven so that you
may be a new lump, as you are unleavened. . . . 11
But now I have written to you not to associate
intimately, if any man called a brother [and is] either
a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or
a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such a one not to
eat. 12  . . .  Do you not judge those who are inside? 13
. .  Therefore put out from you the evil one.

These show that such a separation can be an exercise
in Church discipline, delivering the Christian
offender's body for the destruction of the flesh
(chastening) to the end that the erring saint should be
effectively chastened and stop sinning and in godly
sorrow repent of the fornication.  The sinning saint is
chastened>34 into weakness, sickness or sleep (death)
by the Lord. If weakness or sickness results in godly
sorrow and repentance, then the repentant one is
restored as in the following:
[Footnote: >34  (1 Cor. 5 &/or 11; Heb.12)

MKJV 2 CORINTHIANS 7: 8 For even if I grieved you
in the letter, I do not regret; if indeed I did regret; for
I see that that letter grieved you for an hour. 9 Now I
rejoice, not that you were grieved, but that you
grieved to repentance. For you were grieved
according to God, so that you might suffer loss by
nothing in us.
MKJV 2 CORINTHIANS 2: 6 This punishment by the
majority [is] enough for such a one; 7 so that, on the
contrary, you should rather forgive and comfort [him],
lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up with
overwhelming sorrow. 8 So I beseech you to confirm
[your] love toward him. . . 10 But to whom you forgive
anything, I also [forgive]. For if I forgave anything, for
your sakes I forgave [it] to him in the person of Christ;
11 so that we should not be overreached by Satan, for
we are not ignorant of his devices.

       They would both still be saved and both still be
bound to each other maritaly no matter who else they
married or how many kids they might have had in
the meantime.   There is nothing in scripture that
would indicate the the marital bond between two
genuine Christians is broken by sexual immorality. If
adultery required a marital-bond breaking
divorce/separation, then Matt 5:32 would read as
follows:
       But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife
for any reason  except sexual immorality causes her
to commit adultery;  and        whoever marries a
woman who is divorced for any other     reason than
sexual immorality commits adultery.
This would imply that it would NOT  be adultery to
marry a woman divorced/separated for sexual
immorality.  But what did Jesus say to genuine
believers? He said "... whoever marries a woman who
is divorced commits adultery.">h    He gives no
qualifier or exception except for 1 Cor. 7:12-15 in the
case of the believer divorced/ desserted by the
unsaved mate.  No matter what the reason for the
divorce except 1 Cor. 7:15, including sexual
immorality, "whoever marries a divorced woman
commits adultery."  "And if a woman divorces her
husband and marries another, she commits adultery."
(Mk.10:12).  It is adultery to marry a woman divorced
from her legitimate husband except in the case of 1
Cor. 7:15, in which case God has loosed her from her
husband.   It is adultery to marry a genuinely
believing woman divorced from her genuinely
believing man if they were free to marry in the Lord
when they married, because when they married they
became maritally bound to each other until death
parts them (1Cor. 7:39)

Later in this study we will deal with the issue of why
the Word does not say ".....whoever divorces her
husband, except for sexual immorality, and marries
another, commits adultery.......".

In the other cases presented in this chapter that
require a separation because of the misconduct of
one's mate, I believe the believing mate has to
avoid/withdraw from the erring spouse in such
activities and usually can do so without leaving their
house.  We'll see below that the avoidance/
withdrawal does not include marital intimacy and
affection (1 Cor. 7:1-15).  Dealing with the adulterous
mate is discussed below, so please be patient and read
on.

What should be the spouse's attitude  be  when
married to one to whom she/he is commanded to be
manifesting some form of avoidance or withdrawal?
The key is in 2 Thess 3:15 above where we enjoined
to   "not count [him] as an enemy, but admonish him
as a brother." or in 1 Pet. 3:1 where the wives are
instructed to "be submissive to your own husbands so
that, if any obey not the Word, they also may without
a word be won by the  behavior of the wives . . . . ".
Consider the following:
Luke 17:3  Take heed to yourselves.  If your brother
wrongs you, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive
him.
Galatians 6:1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a
fault, you who are spiritual restore  such a one in the
Spirit of meekness . . .
John 13:10-15  . . . . you also ought to wash each
other's feet, for I have given you an example, that
you should do as I have done  to you.
Ephes. 4:15   . . . speaking the Truth in Love . . . .
Ephes 5:6-11  . . . because of these things comes the
wrath of God upon the sons of disobedience.
Therefore don't be partakers  with them. . . .And have
no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness
but, rather, reprove [them].
1 Tim. 5:20,21 Them that sin rebuke before all, that
others may fear. . 2 Tim. 2:24 And the servant of the
Lord must not strive, but be gentle unto all, able to
teach, patient, in meekness instructing those that
oppose them . . . . .
1 Pet. 3:1  . . . be submissive to your own husbands so
that, if any obey not the Word, they also may without
a word be won by the  behavior of the wives . . . .

The command is "Man must not put apart what God
has put together".   Even if they are
divorced/separated, people "must not put apart what
God has put together."  The genuine Christian wife is
maritally bound to her genuine Christian husband as
long as they both live>i .
[>h Mat.5:32; 19:9.        >i  (1Cor.7:39;Mark 10).]

There is a parallel in the relationship of the Body of
Christ to Christ.  When a brother becomes part of the
Bride of Christ Jesus is bound by His own Word in the
relationship, not to put apart what God has put
together (John 17:2, 6, 9, 10, 20, 21).So when a
brother stumbles into fornication>35, instead of
cutting off the relationship and disowning him,  Jesus
Loves him and has promised to chasten him in that
Love>36.  There is a break in fellowship, a separation,
in that Jesus doesn't respond to his usual prayers>37
and releases his body to Satan for the destruction of
his body>38 in order to save his spirit>39.  He still
belongs to Jesus because he shows that his spirit will
be saved even if the chastening doesn't result in
repentance>40.  No one, neither himself nor Jesus, can
take him out of Jesus hand>41.   So the brother is
chastened>42  and genuinely repents>43, resulting in
his restoration to good standing and fellowship in the
Bride of Christ and with Jesus.
[Footnote: >35.  1 Cor. 5; 2 Tim. 2:24,26.     >36.  1
Cor.5; Hebrews 12.     >37.   Isaiah; Mat. 6:16; 1 Pet.
3:7; 1 Jn. 3:22,23.      >38.   1 Cor. 5:5; 11:27-32; Heb.
12.      >39. 1 Cor. 5:6; 11:27-32    >40.   1 Cor. 5:5;
11:27-32.    >41.  John 10:28,29.     >42.   1 Cor. 5 & 2
Cor. 2.      >43.   2 Cor. 2 and 7].

Another parallel is Jesus and the nation Israel.  Israel
became the bride of Jehovah/Jesus>44.    When Israel
misused their bodies/temple, Jehovah/Jesus allowed
their bodies to suffer>45.    He didn't end His
relationship/promises with the nation Israel, even
though He allowed many of them to suffer/die and
allowed the temple to be destroyed.  When Israel
repented genuinely, He restored His fellowship and
blessings to the genuinely repentant, even allowing
them to rebuild the temple for full fellowship>46.
Jehovah/Jesus' bond with the nation Israel was not
annulled and broken by their sin nor the chastening
He allowed>47.
[Footnote: >44.  (Ex. 20; Ezek. 16:7; 23:1-6).     >45.
1Cor. 10:9,10      >46.  Ezra, Nehemiah.    >47.   Ezekiel
16 and 23; Hosea]

In American reality, because of the wretchedly poor
Bible teaching today Christians,  divorce and remarry
almost as much as J.Q Public.  The Christian wife
divorces her Christian husbandand remarries in
adultery reaping the chastening of the Lord until she
dies>48 or repents in reconciliation or celibacy if she
is genuinely born again.  The Christian man divorces
his Christian wife and remarries.  If he really
repudiates his Christian wife for another and marries
another  he commits adultery>49 and reaps the Lord's
chastening. At this point we need to define our terms.
[Footnotes:>48.  (1 Cor 5 and 11:29-32);        >49
(Mark 10, Luke 16, Matt 5, 1 Cor 7)]

III.  DIVORCE  DEFINED.
       Let me try to clarify the word "divorce" at this
point since it has so many definitions in our current
culture. The Greek word apoluo >1 used by Jesus in
Mark 10:11 & 12 means TO SEND OR PUT AWAY,
DISMISS (FROM ONE'S PRESENCE), RELEASE AND
REPUDIATE. It could be done informally or formally
and legally as divorce.
[Footnote: .>III.1  See also Matt. 1:19; 5:31; 19:3,7-9.]

The Greek word  choridzo >2 , used in Mark 10:9  of
the saved couple and in 1 Cor. 7:10 &11  of the saved
wife , and in v. 15 of the unsaved mate, means TO
SEPARATE ONESELF FROM ANOTHER, BE SEPARATED;
LEAVE, PART OR DEPART FROM, PUT ASUNDER AND
DIVIDE. It could be done informally or formally as a
divorce.  God allows the  Christian wife to choridzo
her husband as second best but still affirms that she
is bound maritally to her husband as in v. 39.
[III. footnotes: >III.2.  See also active: Matt. 19:6; Mark
10:9; Rom. 8;35,39;---passive: 1 Cor. 7:10,11,15;Acts
1:4; 18:2]

The Greek word afeeaymee >141, used of the man in l
Cor. 7:11 and 12 and of the woman in v. 13, means TO
SEND AWAY, ASK TO GO AWAY OR LEAVE,  TO
RELEASE, AND TO LEAVE. This can be done informally
or as a formal divorce.  So the word divorce can mean
many different things depending on one's culture,
society, motivation, intent and purposes.  But the
bottom line is that the husband is commanded not to
send his wife away, nor to ask his wife to leave, nor
release her nor leave her.  Even if she asks or
commands him to leave, He is under the Lord's
command not to leave.  Even if she gets a court order,
he is under God's order not to leave her voluntarily.
If the marshals/officials remove him and his
belongings, then he didn't leave voluntarily.  He was
removed, but he did not relase or leave her.  Separate
rooms, sleeping separately or etc. is not leaving or
releasing her as long as he is obeying 1 Cor. 7:1-5
with her.l
[Footnote: .^141 See also Mat. 13:36;; Mark 4:36.]

In summary we see the following:
       (1) the Christian husband must not
divorce/send away/release  [See apoluo or afeeaymee
above]   his Christian  wife to whom he is bound as
long as they both live. 1 Cor. 5:10,11 and 2 Thess. 3:6
& 14 may require a separation  that doesn't involve
sending her  away, asking her to go away or leave,
releasing her from their marriage bond, or  leaving
her ---- but they are still bound for life.  I
experienced such a separation without leaving with
the mother of my children.  The last two years we
were together we slept inthe same king size bed but
she never let me touch her, kiss her, hold her or make
love with her.  Now that is separation without leaving.
But for the male under 1 Cor. 5:ll and 2 Thess. 3:6,14
commands to "stand apart" from his sining wife would
still be bound by the commands in 1 Cor. 7:2,3,4,5
which could require him to be maritally intimate with
her,  so the  "separation" would have to be in other
areas ---- always in the Spirit of 2 Tim. 2:24-26;
Galat. 6:1,2,3; and Luke 6 ---- like not eating together,
not hanging out together, not dating, not socializing
together , not spending your leisure time together or
etc.
       (2) the saved husband must not divorce/send
away/ask to leave/leave [See afeeaymee above]  his
unsaved wife as long as she agrees or consents or is
willing to dwell/live /house with him.
       (3) the Christian wife must not divorce/send
away/dismiss/repudiate[See apoluo above]  and
should not (but may) divorce/separate
from/leave/put apart [See choridzo above]   her
Christian husband. The saved wife must not
divorce/send away/ask to leave/leave [See
afeeaymee above]   her unsaved husband as long as
he agrees or consents or is willing to dwell/live/house
with her. Because of the definition and 1 Cor. 7:11
some believe that the saved wife also can
divorce/separate from/leave/put apart [choridzo]
her unsaved husband in faithful separation, but still
not divorce/send away/ask to leave/leave
[afeeaymee]   him,  in the event of spousal abuse,
fornication or etc.  These actions find many different
legal and informal forms and expressions in many
different cultures and subcultures.  So when you see
the word �divorce� in your Bible, it at least means
�send away, release�, "leave" or �be separated, put
asunder, divide� informally or formally.

If Mark 10:8-12; 1 Corinthians 7:10,11,39 and Romans
7:1-3 are taken quite literally, a genuinely saved Elias
who legally married (with no vow of exclusivity such
as �forsaking all others� & �keeping yourselves only to
each other until death do you part�) and was legally
divorced by several genuinely saved Jane Does who
just wanted to live as singles again>142 would have to
deal with the question, "Are they still my wives in
God's eyes?". They all divorced him exercising their
scriptural option and whatever he felt or wanted
would be irrelevant in terms of 1 Cor. 7:11,39.  What
if these genuinely saved but carnal Jane Does became
engaged to others and maritally vowed to forsake all
others including their Elias and to keep themselves
only to their new mates until death part them?  It
would be adultery and their vows would be sinful
because those vows would be invalidated by God's
statement in Mark 10:8-12 and 1 Corinth. 7 :11,39
that they are bound to Elias as long as they both live.
[Footnote: >142 (1 Cor. 7:11) ]

But wait a minute!  Wouldn't it be adultery for Elias to
remarry even if his Christian wife divorced him?  I
mean wasn't he still bound to her even if she dumped
him and never saw him again, living single in
separation?  Wouldn't Elias still be bound to his
departed and separated Christian wife (according to1
Corinthians 7:10,11,39) even though her departure for
other reasons than prayer and fasting  leaves him
subject to Satan's temptations due to his not having
the gift of celibacy (1Cor.7:5)?  Why is she allowed to
disobey 1 Cor. 7:5 by leaving him indefinitely (1 Cor.
7:10,11) for some other reason than prayer and
fasting?  To find the answers to these questions, let's
take a look at what the Bible says about the
institution of marriage in its various forms and over
time.

IV.  VARIETIES OF MARRIAGE  IN THE BIBLE

The fouth century's St. Augustine states the
seriousness of this situation powerfully in the
following:
�To such a degree is that marriage compact entered
upon a matter of a certain sacrament, that it is not
made void even by separation itself, since, so long as
her husband lives, even by whom she hath been left,
she commits adultery, in case she be married to
another: and he who hath left her, is the cause of this
evil. . . Seeing that the compact of marriage is not
done away by divorce intervening; so that they
continue wedded persons one to another, even after
separation; and commit adultery with those, with
whom they shall be joined, even after their own
divorce, either the woman with a man, or the man
with a woman. . . But a marriage once for all entered
upon in the City of our God, where, even from the first
union of the two, the man and the woman, marriage
bears a certain sacramental character, can no way be
dissolved but by the death of one of them.  For the
bond of marriage remains, although a family [i.e.
children], for the sake of which it was entered upon,
do not follow through manifest barrenness; so that,
when now married persons know that they shall not
have children, yet it is not lawful for them to separate
even for the very sake of children, and to join
themselves unto others.  And if they shall so do, they
commit adultery with those unto whom they join
themselves, but themselves remain husbands and
wives [to each other] . . Therefore the good of
marriage throughout all nations and all men stands in
the occasion of begetting, and faith of chastity: but, so
far as pertains unto the People of God, also in the
sanctity of the sacrament, by reason of which it is
unlawful for one who leaves her husband, even when
she has been put away, to be married to another, so
long as her husband lives, no not even for the sake of
bearing children:  . . . not even where that very thing,
wherefore it takes place, follows not, is the marriage
bond loosed, save by the death of the husband or
wife.�
[Footnote: >. n102 St. Augustin: On The Trinity;  pp.
402, 406, 412]
�Clearly with the good will of the wife to take another
woman, that from her may be born sons common to
both, by the sexual intercourse and seed of the one,
but by the right and power of the other, was lawful
among the ancient fathers: whether it be lawful now
also, I would not hastily pronounce....�>n93
[Footnote: >n93  St. Augustin: On The Trinity; p. 406.]

Whether or not it is the best form of marriage for
each individual depends on the gift and the leading
(Rom. 8:1-14) each individual receives from God. St.
Augustine (4th Century AD) had a gentler way of
saying it that I feel more reflects the God  of Gen. 1
and 1 Cor. 13. Consider the following: ��That the holy
fathers of olden times after Abraham, and before him,
to whom God gave His testimony that "they pleased
Him," [Heb. 11:4-6]  thus used their wives, no one who
is a Christian ought to doubt, since it was permitted to
certain individuals amongst them to have a plurality
of wives, where the reason was for the multiplication
of their offspring, not the desire of varying
gratification. .That the good purpose of marriage, however, is
better promoted by
one husband with one wife, than by a husband with several
wives, is shown
plainly enough by the very first union of a married pair, which
was made by the
Divine Being Himself, with the intention of marriages
taking their beginning therefrom, and of its affording
to them a more honorable precedent.  In the advance,
however,  of the human race, it came to pass that to
certain good men were united a plurality of good
wives,  --- many to each; and from this it would seem
that moderation sought rather unity on one side for
dignity, while nature permitted plurality on the other
side for fecundity.  For on natural principles it is more
feasible for one to have dominion over many, than for
many to have dominion over one.�
[Footnote: >..34  2b A Select Library of the Nicene and
Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian Church; Vol. V; p.
267]  Consider what Saint Augustine said in the fourth
century AD.
"The only reason of its being a crime now to do
this, is because custom and the laws forbid it.
Whoever despises these restraints, even though he
uses his wives only to get children, still commits sin,
and does an injury to human society itself, for the
sake of which it is that the procreation of children is
required.  In the present altered state of customs and
laws, men can have no pleasure in a plurality of
wives, except from an excess of lust; and so the
mistake arises of supposing that no one could ever
have had many wives but from sensuality and the
vehemence of sinful desires.  Unable to form an idea
of men whose force of mind is beyond their
conception, they compare themselves with
themselves, as the apostle says [2 Cor. x. 12], and so
make mistakes.  Conscious that, in their intercourse
though with one wife only, they are often influenced
by mere animal passion instead of an intelligent
motive, they think it an obvious inference that, if the
limits of moderation are  not observed where there is
only one wife, the infirmity must be aggravated
where there are more than one.">.80
[Footnote: >80 A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-
Nicene Fathers of The Christian Church,  Vol. iv;
pp.289ff.]

"But here there is no ground for a criminal
accusation: for a plurality of wives was no crime when
it was the custom; and it is a crime now, because it is
no longer the custom.  There are sins against nature,
and sins against custom, and sins against the laws.  In
which, then, of these senses did Jacob sin in having a
plurality of wives?  As regards nature, he used the
women not for sensual gratification, but for the
procreation of children.  For custom, this was the
common practice at that time in those countries.  And
for the laws, no prohibition existed.  The only reason
of its being a crime now to do this, is because custom
and the laws forbid it."
[Footnote: >.14  A Select Library of the Nicene and
Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian Church, Vol. iv;
p. 289]
But what of those who say that having
more than one wife in those days was a falling short
of the will of God and reflected a weakness in the
character of those who participated in polygyny?   St.
Augustine has a good word, as follows:
"But those who have not the virtues of temperance
must not be allowed to judge of the conduct of holy
men, any more than those in fever of the sweetness
and wholesomeness of food. . . If our critics, then,
wish to attain not a spurious and affected, but a
genuine and sound moral health, let them find a cure
in believing the Scripture record, that the honorable
name of saint is given not without reason to men who
had several wives; and that the reason is this, that the
mind can exercise such control over the flesh as not to
allow the appetite implanted in our nature by
Providence to go beyond the limits of deliberate
intention. . . . the holy patriarchs in their conjugal
intercourse were actuated not by the love of pleasure,
but by the intelligent desire for the continuance of
their family. . . .nor did the number of their wives
make the patriarchs licentious. But why defend the
husbands, to whose character the divine word bears
the highest testimony. . . ."
[Footnote: >.23  A Select Library of the Nicene and
Post-Nicene Fathers of The Christian Church, Vol. iv;
p.290]
There is no scripture that says a  wife in polygyny  is less of
a wife than a wife in monogamy.  There is no scripture that
says a husband in polygyny  is less of a husband than a
husband in monogamy.   Consider St. Augustine�s
point in the following:� . . . no one doubts  . . . who
reads with careful attention what use they made of
their wives, at a time when also it was allowed one
man to have several, whom he had with more chastity
than any now has his one wife . . . But then they
married even several without any blame . . �>65
[Footnotes:  >..65 St. Augustin: On The Trinity; p. 406.]

The following list of polygynists is fascinating:
Jesus/Jehovah (Ezek. 23); Lamech (GEN. 4: 19);  Abraham with
Sarah, Hagar and Keturah(Gen. 25:1-6); Nahor(Gen. 22:20-24);
Hezron's Caleb(1Chronicles 2:46); Esau and his son (Gen.
26:34,35;36:12); Jacob with Rachel and Leah (Gen. 29 & 30);
Jacob�s son Ashur had two wives (1Chron. 4:5); Jacob's son,
Manasseh, had a concubine(1 Chron 7:14);   Benjamin�s
Shaharaim (1 Chron.8:8); Gideon (Judges 8:29-32); the Levite's
concubine (Judges 19); King David (2 Samuel 3 &12:7); King
Solomon (1 Kings 11); king Rehoboam (2 Chron. 11 & 12) ;
Godly king Abijah (2 Chron. 13); the Godly High Priest
Jehoida gave two wives to godly king Joash in 2 Chron 24;
Godly queen Esther was a wife blessed by God in her
polygyny .    More than all this, we Jesus/Jehovah legislating
His will about the pracitce of polygyny in the following:

MKJV EXODUS 21: 7 �And if a man sells his daughter to be
a maidservant, she shall not go out as the menservants
do.  8 If she does not please her master, who has
betrothed her to himself, then he shall let her be
redeemed. He shall have no power to sell her to a strange
nation, since he has dealt deceitfully with her.  9 And if
he has betrothed her to his son, he shall deal with her as
with daughters.  10 If he takes himself another [wife],
her food, her clothing, and her duty of marriage shall not
be lessened. 11 And if he does not do these three to her,
then she shall go out free without money.�
Deut. 21:15 � �If a man have two wives, one beloved, and
one hated, and they have borne him children, [both] the
beloved and the hated, and [if] the first-born son be hers
that was hated;  16 then it shall be, in the day that he
makes his sons to inherit [that] which he has, [that] he
may not make the son of the beloved first-born before
the son of the hated, who is the first-born;  17 but he
shall acknowledge as first-born the son of the hated, by
giving him a double portion of all that he has; for he is
the firstfruits of his strength: the right of the firstborn is
his.�

It is incredible to think that Jesus and the apostles
would say nothing about such a widespread
contemporary practice as polygyny if it were indeed
sinful, less than God's best, carnal and reprobate to
good works.  God never said such a thing in Old
Testament times and He obviously never said such a
thing in New Testament times.  When you consider
how specific God was in Lev. chaps. 18-22; Deut.
chaps. 22-24; Romans 1; 1 Cor. 6; 2 Cor. 6; Gal. 5 and
etc.,  I can not believe that God would "forget" to
include polygyny if it is as bad as most Christian
leaders say  it is.

VI.  ADULTERY DEFINED,  A  SURPRISE!   ISN�T
POLYGYNY ADULTERY?

        Some say �The same laws apply to both male
and female.  This is an issue of nature, not role.
Therefore all are equal: male and female.�  Some Bible
interpreters are more zealous for unisex doctrines and
practices than the bleeding heart liberals who
encourage unisex restroom and coed dorms.  God
made males and females very different for a reason,
and we miss the mark when we fail to recognize the
differences He made and instituted. Mary
leave/divorces Elias.  Some say that this forsaken
Elias commits adultery when he marries Sally but the
Biblical definition of adultery>143  in Matt. 5:32 and
19:6-9; Mark 10:1-11; Luke 16:18; 1 Thess. 4:4-6 and
Romans 7:1-3>143 plainly states the double standard
in the definition of adultery.  There really are
different scriptural laws for men than for women
governing marriage and remarriage, and there are
different scriptural laws for men than for women
defining adultery.

Adultery for the woman:
1. "Whoever marries a woman who is divorced
commits adultery">144.  The reason being that she is
still bound to him as wife.>145.
[Footnote: >144  Mat. 5:32; 19:9; Luke 16:18; except in
the cases of 1 Cor. 7:12-15,39; 1 Tim. 5:14.      >145.  1
Cor. 7:10, 11, 39; Romans 7:1-3. ]

2.  The husband "causes her to commit adultery"
when he divorces her for any reason other than
sexual immorality>146.   The reason being that she is
still bound to him as wife.>147       In 1 Corinth. 7:5
we see that her husband "causes her to commit
adultery"  because her husband is failing to meet her
marital needs and the enemy of her soul tempts in
her burning need. (On the other hand: The wife is not
said to cause her husband to commit adultery when
she divorces him for any other reason than sexual
immorality, probably because he is free to be a
polygynist.)
[Footnote: >146.  Matt. 5:32; 19:9.     >147  1 Cor. 7:10,
11, 39; Romans 7:1-3.]

3. "And if a woman divorces her husband and marries
another, she commits adultery.">148.   The adultery
consists of both divorce AND remarriage.   The reason
being that she is still bound to him as wife.>149.
[Footnotes:>148.  Mark 10:12.    >149.  1 Cor. 7:10, 11,
39; Romans 7:1-3.]

4. "if, while her husband lives, she marries another
man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her
husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is
no adulteress, though she has married another
man.">150
[Footnote: >150.  Romans 7:3.]

Adultery for the man:
1. "Whoever marries a woman who is divorced
commits adultery", obviously because she still is
bound to the husband from whom she is divorced.
[>.^151. Mat. 5:32; 19:9; except in the cases of 1 Cor.
7:12-15,39; 1 Tim. 5:14.]

2. "Whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual
immorality, and marries another, commits adultery."
The adultery consists of divorcing his wife for
something else besides sexual immorality AND then
remarrying.    If he stayed married to his wife and
married another, he became a polygynist.  On the
other hand, it is implied here that if he divorces his
wife for sexual immorality and marries another, he
does not commit adultery.   His divorcing her does not
cause  her to commit adultery because she is already
immorally sexually involved with someone else.   His
refusal to meet her sexual needs (1 Cor 7:2-5) does
not cause her to be immoral because she is already
being immoral.  He is commanded not to be intimate
with her (1Cor.5:11) but his lack of her intimacy will
cause him to be tempted (1 Cor.7:5).  If the
temptations overcome him and he is faling to control
himself, burning with marital desire, he comes under
command to marry (1Cor.7:9) and so remarries in the
Lord. [Footnote: >152.  Matt 19: 9: Mark 10:11; Luke
16:18.152.]

3. "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits
adultery against her." Mark 10:11 Pretty clear, right?  But please note
that nowhere in the Bible does He say "Whoever remains married to
his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her."
Why?  Remembering that when Jesus walked on earth He Himself
commanded the apostles and His disciples to observe and obey all of
the Law of Moses>a., including the Laws about polygyny cited in the
following, and that the apostles and Jewish believers kept and
observed all the Laws given to Moses (including those about
polygyny) through the entire book of Acts>b. period up until God
released the apostles and believing Jews from the Law of Moses in
Ephesians 2 and Colosians 2, consider the following facts:
(1) Immediately after God gave Moses the ten commandments He
gave Moses instructions for men who have more than one wife>14. .
(2) Later He gave Moses instructions (Dt.12:1ff) for a husband who
has two wives>15. .
(3) He gave Moses specific instructions for the brother-in-laws of a
widow and did not exempt any brother who was already married>16.
and Jesus introduced no such exemption when He spoke of this
passage>17.
(4) God Himself told polygynist King David (he had ten +/- wives and
concubines at the time>18. ) that He had been with him wherever he
had
gone, that He would make a great name for him, that his descendant
would be the Messiah>19. , and that He Himself had given David
more
than one wife>20.
(5) God, who cannot sin and never portrays Himself as sinning,
portrayed Himself as the polygynist husband of two wives in Ezekiel
23.
[Footnotes: >a.  Matthew 23:1-3
>b.  In Matthew 23:1-3 Jesus commands obedience to the Laws give n
to Moses.  In Acts 15 the believing  non-Jews, not the believing Jews,
were released from the Laws given to Moses.  In Acts 21:15-25 we see
the Jewish apostle Paul and the surviving apostles still obeying the
Law of Moses in obedience to Christ in Matt. 23:1-3.
>14.  Exodus 21:7-11 (See Hosea 3:2; Deut. 25:5-10; Lev. 19:20)
>15.  Deut. 21:15-17 (See 2 Chron. 24:3; Gen. 29:33; 1 Chron.5:2; 26:10;
2 Kings 2:9)
>16.  Deut. 25:5-10
>17.  Matt. 22:23-25; Mark 12:18-20; Luke 20:27-29
>18.  2 Samuel 5:13; 6:12-23
>19. 2 Samuel 7:8-17
>20.  2 Samuel 12:8 ; that this did not mean platonic care is evident
from 1 Kings 1:1-3; 2:13-25.]

4. "You shall not covet your neighbor's wife.">153.
"You shall not lie carnally with your neighbor's
wife�>154.  "For this is the will of God. . . ..that no one
should take advantage of and defraud/cheat his
brother in this matter.�>155.    A genuine Christian
wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives and
she becomes an adulteress when she marries another
while he still lives.
[Footnotes:>153. Exod. 20:17.  >154. Leviticus18:20.
>155. 1 Thess. 4:3-6.]

Adultery for the female is sexual intimacy with
anyone else besides her own husband/mate. Adultery
for the male is when (1) he is married to a new wife
and had left/rejected/divorced his former wife in
order to marry this new wife>99 . ; or (2) is sexually
intimate with some one else�s wife. It is this double
standard that allowed Abraham, Jacob, David and
Joash to be godly polygamists, but declared a woman
to be an adulteress if she was intimate
with anyone but her own mate.  It is a double
standard for the man and the woman, just like
polygyny was/is a double standard for the man and
the woman.  The same sin is defined differently for
the woman and differently for the man.  See more on
this below.
[Footnotes:>99 It is  the combination of divorcing one's
mate in order to marry another and then marrying
that other. If he both dutifully keeps his own wife
and then marries another woman, it is polygyny and
not adultery.  If the wife dutifully keeps her own
husband and marries another it is adultery (Romans
7:3)  The double standard is clearly laid out in Matt.
5:32 and 19:6-9; Mark 10:1-11; Luke 16:18; 1 Thess.
4:4-6 and Romans 7:1-3; 1 Corinth. 7:39]

It is this double standard that results from the man
being the designated the head of the family (Gen 2;
1Cor. 11), that results in what appears to be another
inequity.    In Mt. 5:32 Jesus apparently allows the
genuinely believing husband to divorce his wife
because she is snared in sexual immorality.  Not only
is he allowed to divorce her, he is allowed to remarry.
If she is genuinely saved, she is still bound maritlly to
him as wife before the Lord, even though she is
snared in sex sin and Jesus hasn't finished his Mat.
18;15-18 & 1 Cor. 5:5-11 work with her yet.  He
remarries with a free-in-the-Lord-to-marry
genuinely believing woman and is now bound before
the Lord to two wives. If the one involved in sex sin
survives 1 Cor . 5 and repents according to 2 Cor. 2 &
7, he must accept her back as his wife along with his
new wife, being bound to both as long as he and they
all live.  But what about the genuinely saved wife
whose "believing" husband is involved in sex sin so
she is commanded to separate from and not be
intimate with him.

Such a wife separates from him according to 1 Cor.
7:10,11 but after a while she finds herself being
tempted according to 1 Cor.7:5.  Then she falls to the
temptation and is afraid she might fall to it again,
finds herself maritally burning and under command
be married and have marital sex (1Cor.7:5,9).
Hopefully Jesus has finished his 1 Cor. 5:4,5-11 work
and the guy has either died and his spirit is with the
Lord, if he were really saved, or he has repented
according to 2 Cor 2 & 7 and is ready to be reconciled
to her.  Or in the case of Matt. 18:15-18 she has
learned that she is to relate to him as an unsaved
person, an unsaved person who no longer wants to
live with her, no longer wants her as his
wife(1Cor7:13,15), so she is free from him and free to
obey the Lord and get married in the Lord.

Will God intervene in behalf of His fasting and
praying but maritally burning and sorely tempted
daughter, who as wife is separated from her husband
because of his 1 Cor. 5 sin, and because of that
separation is burning with marital desire and sorely
tempted?  If He took out the rich and unloving
believers in 1 Cor. 11 for the shabby way they
stumbled and offended their poorer brethren in the
celebration of the Lord's supper, don't you think He
will give her a 1 Cor. 10:13 out or make a quick end
the husband causing her the grief? The God who
promised 1 Cor. 10:13 and Phil. 4:6,7,13,18,19 will not
break those promises.

Let's look at some hypothetical examples.  Elias was
divorced/ rejected/abandoned by Jane (with his
never repudiating or rejecting Jane as wife) his new
marriage to free-to-marry Sally may violate no
scripture, may not be what the Bible calls adultery
and may seem to put him in the Old Testament
position of having and being bound to more than one
wife. I understand he would still be bound by the
Lord to the saved wife who left him.

But the way is narrow.  If saved Jane leaves/divorces
her saved Elias and marries Harry, it is adultery as
long as both Jane and Harry are married and Elias
lives.  If saved Elias leaves/divorces saved Jane for
Sally and marries saved Sally, it is adultery as long as
Jane lives and Elias and Sally are married and
repudiating Jane.   If Elias's wife Sally is sexually
intimate with someone else it is adultery.  If  Elias is
sexually intimate with Pete's lawful wife, it is
adultery.  If married Elias is sexually intimate with
single/ unmarried Susie who is playing the harlot
(having sex without being married), it is
fornication>156 If American and legally married-to-
Jane Elias also legally marries free-to-marry Betty, it
is a sin because Elias is under command>157 to obey
the laws of the government authorities which forbids
official/legal bigamy and polygyny  and he would
have to live with the legal consequences.
[Footnotes:>156  (Ezekiel 16 and 23 and 1 Corinth. 6.
>157 Romans 13; 1 Peter 2:12-14]

Mark 10 ; 1 Cor 7:10,11, 12, 13-15,39; and Rom 7
seem to state rather clearly that a Christian marriage
lasts and is binding on both as long as both live. That
being the case I often wondered why God gave the
Christian wife the second best option of departing and
remaining unmarried and possibly being reconciled
with her saved husband later.  The husband is given
no such second best option.  He must not leave his
wife, period! Because of spousal abuse I can
understand why God would allow  a wife to separate
herself while still bound to the abuser in marriage in
order to allow the exercise of church discipline>158 to
have an effect.  But what about that poor turkey of a
husband who is warned by God>159 that being
deprived of his wife will result in Satanic temptations
to immorality and that he is explicitly forbidden to
leave her, send her away or ask her to leave>160. No
qualifications or exceptions.  Why the double
standard?  See below.
[Footnotes:>158  (Matt 18 and l Cor 5).      >159  (1 Cor.
7:1-5).      >160  (Greek of l Cor. 7:11,12 and Mark 10)]

The scriptures above make it plain that if Jane
Dovany exercised her 1 Cor 7:11 repentance option,
having left/divorced Elias, and then Elias repudiated/
rejected Jane in order to marry Sally, Elias's
rejection/repudia-tion of Jane coupled with his
marriage to Sally constitutes Biblical adultery.  It
would be adultery if saved Jane divorced/ rejected
saved Elias and married Harry because Biblical
adultery in the scriptures above is saved Jane
divorcing/  rejecting saved Elias and marrying some
one else.  According to all of those scriptures, adultery
for the male is either (1) the act of marrying or being
intimate with someone else's wife, (2) or the act of
leaving one wife and taking another wife.  Adultery
for the wife is having sexual intimacy with anyone
else except her husband to whom she is married for
life.   If you very carefully examine those scriptures
you will see that the Bible does not say it is adultery
for Elias to recognize AS WIFE his self-separated Jane
and at the same time take as wife another saved and
free-to-marry (unbound/ unmarried) sister.  See the
discussion on polygyny.

Yes, that�s right, there is a double standard going all
the way back to Genesis.  It was not adultery for a
married man to marry another woman free-to-marry
under the laws of God throughout the whole Old
Testament.  It was legal and divinely permitted
polygyny , if the scriptures  are understood correctly.
Under the same Word of God, a woman who was
sexually intimate with another besides her own
husband was an adulteress.  The double standard
started in Genesis 3:16, restated in 1 Corinth. 11 and 1
Timothy 2  appear to allow a godly man to be a
polygamist but does not allow a godly woman to be a
polyandrist.

The woman's repentance option explains the �double
standard� and apparent inequity of 1 Corinthians
7:10,11 where it appears that the woman who has left
her husband has the repentance option of  remaining
single but the man must never leave his wife. If a
wife left her husband according to 1 Cor. 7:11, he
would immediately be put in the hazardous position
of 1 Corinth 7:1-5, being tempted to sin because his
wife will not give him the marital sexual outlet since
she is gone. It seemed to me to be quite unfair that
she could leave him and live  unmarried, and he,
knowing he is still bound to her for life, has to
struggle with the burning temptations predicted in 1
Corinth. 7:1-5, 9 with no legitimate sexual outlet.

Then I realized that 1 Corinth. 7:1-5 predicted his
need of marital intimacy, how Satan would use the
wife's absence to tempt him, how marital intimacy is
the prescription to avoid Satan's temptations, and
then the command  in verse 9  plainly commands the
one to marry who is failing to have successful self-
control>100  .  Then I realized that the polygyny
option balanced the equation.  The wife could leave
her husband and remain single and the husband who
was still bound to such a departed wife seems to have
had a Biblical option of polygyny / concubinage,
(depending on the laws of his land) if he found
himself tempted and burning as in 1 Cor. 7:5, 9,12.
She could leave and he could remarry becoming a
polygamist and the inequity was gone.  She could
separate and remain single, and he could remarry as
long as he recognized that he was still bound to his
separated wife.
[Footnote: >100    See Appendix Six.]

Now consider the case where the  wife, claiming to be
a Christian, refuses for years to obey 1 Cor. 7:1-5 with
her saved husband and then finally leaves, abandons,
rejects ,separates herself , and dismisses him from her
presence.  She doesn't care about getting a formal
divorce but feels free to  date and get involved with
another man.  Her abandoned  husband is faced with
the question, "Is she saved and is it a case of 1 Cor.
7:11 & 39 or is she unsaved
and is he free according to l Cor. 7:12 & 15?"  Her
abandoned husband wants to do Matt. 18:15-17 to
clarify the situation and get an answer to his question
but can find no Christian body willing to do the
following:
MKJV MKJV 1 CORINTH. 5:  . . . �I indeed have judged
already [as though I were] present [concerning] him
who worked out this thing;  4 in the name of our Lord
Jesus Christ, when you are gathered together, with my
spirit; also, with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ; 5
to deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of
the flesh, so that the spirit may be saved in the day of
the Lord Jesus. . . . 11 But now I have written to you
not to associate intimately, if any man called a
brother [and is] either a fornicator, or covetous, or an
idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner;
with such a one not to eat. 12  . . .  Do you not judge
those who are inside?  13 . . .  Therefore put out from
you the evil one.�
       MKJV MATTHEW 5:32* �But I say to you that
whoever shall put away his  wife, except for the cause
of fornication, causes her      to commit adultery. And
whoever shall marry her who is put      away
commits adultery.�
MATTHEW 18: 15 � �But if your brother shall trespass
against you, go and tell him his fault between you and
him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your
brother.  16 But if he will not hear [you], take one or
two more with you, so that in [the] mouth of two or
three witnesses every word may be established. 17
And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell [it] to the
church. But if he neglects to hear the church, let him
be to you as a heathen and a tax-
collector.�
       5:32*� But I say to you that whoever shall put
away his wife, except for  the cause of fornication,
causes her to commit adultery. And whoever shall
marry her who is put away commits adultery. . . .�
18 �Truly I say to you, Whatever you shall bind on
earth shall occur, having been bound in Heaven; and
whatever you shall loose on earth shall occur, having
been loosed in Heaven.�

This means he is unable to clarify the status of both
himself and his departed wife.  He is unable to
determine if she is unsaved and he is free to
remarry>161,   , or if she is saved and he is bound
maritally to her for life>162    So without sending her
away, dismissing , repudiating, leaving, releasing or
separating himself from her, he gets a legal divorce
(on the grounds of irreconcilable differences) for state
and federal tax and inheritance purposes but
reaffirms in writing  to her what he believes may be
the binding nature of their relationship>163 .
[Footnotes>161    1 Cor. 7:12,13,14,15.        >162    1
Cor. 7:10,11, 39; Mark 10; Rom. 7:1-5.       >163  (1 Cor.
7:39)]

So the divorce is only a  legal recognition of the wife's
departure and unwillingness to be reconciled, while
he still publicly recognizes  the binding nature of their
relationship.  Then he  remarries another  Christian
because his burning and his 1 Cor. 7:5 predicted
failures to control himself bring him under the
command to marry in l Cor. 7:9,36 (NIV & Amplified
"they should marry"),
1 Cor. 7:36 (NIV "They should get married);
1 Tim 5:14 (NIV "So I counsel younger widows to
marry.."
       Amplified "So I would have younger [widows]
       marry..") and
1 Thess 4:3-8 (NIV "that each of you should learn to
control his own body in a way that is holy and
honorable . . ..") >101
[Footnote>101  Please see Appendix Six;   NIV  , NEW
INTERNA-TIONAL VERSION. ]

He has entered the realm of American polygyny .
Legally divorced and remarried but openly
acknowledging his marital ties to two "sisters-in-
Christ", he is an American polygamist.  The departed
wife could remarry in adultery or remain single the
rest of her life while he continues in his new
marriage.  If she repents and opts for reconciliation
after he has married again,  all of her rights and
privileges as in 1 Cor. 7:1-5 & 39 are in force and the
husband faces the complex dilemma described next.
How do you have two wives in America where it is
illegal to officially and "legally" have more than one
wife of  official public record with tax and inheritance
rights granted and protected by the government?

Polygyny  in and of itself is not a sin and was
tolerated in the Bible>71, unless practiced in violation
of men�s laws>53  , or unless its practice is abused by
offensive selfishness and sinfulness>54.  The polygyny
of concubinage is not illegal in modern society, but is
bound by the principles of Liberated Love in Romans
14, 1 Cor 8 and 10.
[Footnote: >.71   Please see THE INSTITUTES OF
BIBLICAL  LAW, by R. Rushdonney, p. 364.
HASTINGS DICTIONARY OF THE BIBLE; 1989,  p.259;
p.583ff.       >53    (Rom 13).     >54   (Rom. 14) ]

X. DOES GOD FORGIVE BROKEN VOWS, DIVORCE AND
ADULTERY?
The issue here is does God forgive born again
Christians when they fall into divorce and adultery?
The cornerstone of this issue is "What is a born again
Christian?"    Genuinely born again Christians would
be characterized by the
following: (1) They have believed and received Jesus
Christ, God revealed in the flesh, as the Master of
their daily lives and as their Savior from the penalties
and power of sin in their lives;  (2) They have a
consistent public testimony by word and deed of their
salvation; (3) They live in obedience to the Word at
home and away from home; (4) They are
compassionately and effectively involved in nurturing
and shepherding Christian fellowship; (5) They are
characterized by the fruits of the Spirit instead of the
works of the flesh; (6) They are faithfully in the Word
in a life building way; and (7) They are faithfully in
prayer on a regular basis.  If any of these is missing,
you should not feel comfortable about their status
with the Lord and it would be a mistake to assume
that they are really saved.

We don't have to decide if someone is saved, all we
have to do is decide if their life lines up with the
Word, and if it doesn't, then we are to do the
following:
MKJV 1 TIMOTHY 5:19 �Do not receive an accusation
against an elder except before two or three witnesses.
20 Those who sin, rebuke before all, so that the rest
also may fear.  21 I charge [you] before God and [the]
Lord Jesus
Christ, and the elect angels, that you guard these
things without prejudice, doing nothing by partiality.�
MKJV GALA. 6: 1 � �Brothers, if a man is overtaken in
a fault, you the spiritual ones restore such a one in
the spirit of meekness, considering yourself, lest you
also be tempted.   2 Bear one another's burdens, and
so you will fulfill the law of Christ.�
DARBY MATT. 18:15 � �But if thy brother sin against
thee, go, reprove him between thee and him alone. If
he hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if
he do not hear [thee], take with thee one or two
besides, that every
matter may stand upon the word of two witnesses or
of three. 17 But if he will not listen to them, tell it to
the assembly; and if also he will not listen to the
assembly, let him be to thee as one of the nations and
a tax-gatherer.�
DARBY 1 CORINTH.5:3 �For *I*, [as] absent in body but
present in spirit, have already judged as present, 4 [to
deliver,] in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ (ye and
my spirit being gathered together, with the power of
our Lord Jesus Christ), him that has so wrought this: 5
to deliver him, [I say,] [being] such, to Satan for
destruction of the flesh, that the spirit may be saved
in the day of the Lord Jesus.�
DBY 2 THESS. 3: 6 � �Now we enjoin you, brethren, in
the name of our Lord
Jesus Christ, that ye withdraw from every brother
walking disorderly and not according to the
instruction which he received from us. . . .14 But if
any one obey not our word by the letter, mark that
man, and do not keep company with him, that he may
be ashamed of himself; 15 and do not esteem him as
an enemy, but admonish [him] as a brother.�

If they fail the Matt. 18:15-18 procedure, then God
tells us to treat and relate to  them as if they were
unsaved.  This would be very important for a
Christian married to someone of whose salvation
he/she is not sure.  This uncertainty should be
resolved so the Christian could know if his/her
instructions are those of 1 Cor. 7:10,11,39 or 1 Cor.
7:12-15.  So we are talking about real, sincere and
genuine children of God who become involved in
divorce etc. and need to know God's will for them.

Can a Christian divorce a Christian mate, ask God to
forgive them, and then go on and marry another
Christian with God's blessing? In Matt. 5:23,24 Jesus
says you must not only ask forgiveness but you must
attempt to right the wrong for which you seek
forgiveness.  Zaccheus received Jesus salvation
because he not only confessed his sin but also righted
his wrongs against others.  In Mark 10:11, 12 Jesus
did not say, Whoever divorces his wife, asks
forgiveness for divorcing his wife and then marries
another  may be  blessed.  Not at all, and quite to the
contrary.
       Mark 10:7 �For this cause a man shall leave his
father and mother and cleave to his wife,  8 and the
two shall be one flesh;  so then they are no longer two
but one flesh.  9 What therefore God has joined
together, let not man separate. . . . 11 And he says to
them, Whosoever shall put away his wife and shall
marry another, commits adultery against her.  12 And
if a woman shall put away her husband and shall
marry another, she commits adultery.�

       The adultery is not just that he married her in a
wedding ceremony, a single event, rather the adultery
is that he continues to be married to her and keeps on
being married to her.  It's not a matter of asking God
to forgive you for the wedding ceremony that
resulted in you being married.  It is a matter of
asking God to forgive you for continuing and keeping
on being married to your  new adulterous mate.  The
Greek verb is present tense indicative which indicates
an on going and continuing condition.  The one who
put away the other and marries yet another keeps on
and continues committing adultery against the one
put away as long as the one put away remains put
away.

So He said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and
marries another keeps on and continues committing
adultery against her.  And if a woman divorces her
husband and marries another, she keeps on and
continues committing
adultery."

Matt. 21:28-32 reveals it is the one who regrets the
wrong and rights the wrong that does the will of his
father. In the context of faithfulness, trustworthiness
and covenant keeping >164 Jesus says that it is
adultery to
repudiate (reject, dismiss, send away, abandon, etc.)
and marry another and whoever marries the
repudiated wife commits adultery. The wrongs are
repudiation with remarriage.  He who confesses and
covers repudiation with remarriage will not prosper,
but whoever agrees with God about repudiation and
remarriage and forsakes the repudiation and
remarriage will have mercy from God>165 .
[Footnotes:>164(Luke 16:1-18).    >165  (Prov 28:13)]

The omolego  confession of 1 John 1:9 means the one
who AGREES WITH GOD ABOUT HIS SIN  receives His
faithful and just forgiveness.  To agree with God about
the sin of repudiation-with-remarriage adultery
means to forsake the repudiation-with-remarriage
adultery.   It doesn't mean saying "OOPS! I'm so
sorry!" and expecting God to forgive you for
repudiating/ leaving your mate now that you have
married another.  The sin to be forsaken is the sin of
repudiating/leaving/ putting away the mate to whom
you are bound for life in the Lord---and marrying
another mate.

Just because you confess that you repudiated (or etc.)
your saved wife doesn't change  the following
scriptures ----
MKJV MALACHI 2: 14 �Yet you say, Why? Because the
LORD has been witness between you and the wife of
your youth, against whom you have dealt
treacherously; yet she [is] your companion and your
covenant wife. 15 And did He not make [you] one? Yet
the vestige of the Spirit [is in] him. And what [of] the
one? He was seeking a godly seed. Then guard your
spirit, and do not act treacherously with the wife of
your youth. 16 The LORD, the God of Israel, says He
hates sending away; and to cover [with] violence on
his garment, says the LORD of hosts. Then guard your
spirit, and do not act treacherously�
MJJV LUKE 16: 15 �And He said to them, You are those
who justify yourselves before men, but God knows
your hearts. For that which is highly esteemed among
men is abomination in the sight of God. . . .18
Everyone putting away his wife and marrying another
commits adultery; and everyone marrying her who is
put away from [her] husband commits adultery.�
DBY MARK 10: 6 but from [the] beginning of [the]
creation God made them male and female.  7 For this
cause a man shall leave his father and mother and
shall be united to his wife,  8 and the two shall be one
flesh: so that they are no longer two but one flesh.  9
What therefore God has joined together, let not man
separate. . . . 11 And he says to them, Whosoever shall
put away his wife and shall marry another, commits
adultery against her.  12 And if a woman put away
her husband and shall marry another, she commits
adultery.�
DBY ROMANS 7:1 � �Are ye ignorant, brethren, (for I
speak to those knowing law,) that law rules over a
man as long as he lives?  2* For the married woman is
bound by law to her husband so long as he is alive;
but if the husband should die, she is clear from the
law of the husband:  3* so then, the husband being
alive, she shall be called an adulteress if she be to
another
man; but if the husband should die, she is free from
the law, so as not to be an
adulteress, though she be to another man.�
DBY 1 CORINTH. 7: 4 �The wife has not authority over
her own body, but the husband: in like manner also
the husband has not authority over his own body, but
the wife.  5 Defraud not one another, unless, it may
be, by consent for a time, that ye may devote
yourselves to prayer, and again be together, that
Satan tempt you not because of your incontinency. . . .
10* � But to the married I enjoin, not *I*, but the
Lord, Let not wife be separated from husband; 11*
(but if also she shall have been separated, let her
remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband;)
and let not husband leave wife. . . . 39* � A wife is
bound for whatever time her husband lives; but if the
husband be fallen asleep, she is free to be married to
whom she will, only in [the] Lord.�

These plainly state that you are bound to born-again
mate as long as you both live.  When God forgives us
he washes us and accepts us while at the same time
condemning and denouncing the wrong that we did.
The confession with forgiveness doesn't undo the
sinful deed, but rights the sinner and frees him from
the eternal consequences of his sin.  In like manner
we are told to submit to judgment the sinning saint in
his sin >166 and when he renounces and forsakes the
sin we forgive and reconcile with him>167 .
[Footnontes: >166 (1 Cor. 5:1-11).     >167  (2 Cor.2)]

2 Cor 7 makes it plain that worldly sorrow which
results in no or inadequate repentance brings
judgment while godly sorrow that works genuine
repentance from  the  wrong and sinful act/deed/
thought results in deliverance.  We are to  diligently,
zealously, angrily, earnestly vindicate
ourselves by clearing ourselves of the wrong and/or
sinful matter (adulterous repudiation-with-
remarriage).  We are to clear ourselves of the
repudiation-with-remarriage that is the adultery.
There is no way we can run to the God of the
following passages and expect Him to favor and bless
the one who breaks his engagement and/or wedding
vows, covenants, oaths and promises.
MKJV PSALM 15: 1 � �A Psalm of David. LORD, who
shall dwell in Your
tabernacle? . . .2 He who walks uprightly, and works
righteousness, and speaks the truth in his heart; . . .
[he] has sworn to his hurt, and does not change it; 5 . .
He who does these [things] shall not be moved
forever.�
MKJV ECCLES. 5:4 � �When you vow a vow to God, do
not wait to pay it. For He has no pleasure in fools. Pay
that which you have vowed. 5 [it is] better that you
should not vow, than that you should vow and not
pay. 6 Do not allow your mouth to cause your flesh to
sin; do not say before the angel that it [was] an error.
Why should God be angry at your voice and destroy
the work of your hands?�
DBY MALACHI 2:14 �Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because
Jehovah hath been a
witness between thee and the wife of thy youth,
against whom thou hast dealt unfaithfully: yet is she
thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.  15 And
did not one make [them]? and the remnant of the
Spirit was his. And
wherefore the one? He sought a seed of God. Take
heed then to your spirit, and let none deal
unfaithfully against the wife of his youth, 16 (for I
hate putting away, saith Jehovah the God of Israel;)
and he covereth with violence his garment, saith
Jehovah of hosts: take heed then to your spirit, that
ye deal not unfaithfully.�
MKJV ROMANS 1:28 �And even as they did not think
fit to have God in [their] knowledge, God gave them
over to a reprobate mind, to do the things not right,
29  . . .[becoming] . . ., haters of God, insolent,
covenant-breakers, . . . 32 who, knowing the righteous
order of God, that those practicing such things are
worthy of death, not only do them, but have pleasure
in those practicing [them].�

You can�t run to this God of integrity and honor and
say, "OOPS! I'm so sorry I repudiated (or etc.) my
wife, Carlita, for Sonia and went on and married Sonia.
I know you'll forgive me for divorcing my Carlita and
breaking  my vows and promises to her so I can be
blessed  by You with my Sonia!"   Romans 13:7-14
and l Cor.11:27-33 shows that God holds us
responsible to do His right things with those with
whom we have to do, and woe to us if we don't.

The fouth century's St. Augustine states the
seriousness of this situation powerfully in the
following:
�To such a degree is that marriage compact entered
upon a matter of a certain sacrament, that it is not
made void even by separation itself, since, so long as
her husband lives, even by whom she hath been left,
she commits adultery, in case she be married to
another: and he who hath left her, is the cause of this
evil. . . Seeing that the compact of marriage is not
done away by divorce intervening; so that they
continue wedded persons one to another, even after
separation; and commit adultery with those, with
whom they shall be joined, even after their own
divorce, either the woman with a man, or the man
with a woman. . . But a marriage once for all entered
upon in the City of our God, where, even from the first
union of the two, the man and the woman, marriage
bears a certain sacramental character, can no way be
dissolved but by the death of one of them.  For the
bond of marriage remains, although a family [i.e.
children], for the sake of which it was entered upon,
do not follow through manifest barrenness; so that,
when now married persons know that they shall not
have children, yet it is not lawful for them to separate
even for the very sake of children, and to join
themselves unto others.  And if they shall so do, they
commit adultery with those unto whom they join
themselves, but themselves remain husbands and
wives [to each other] . . Therefore the good of
marriage throughout all nations and all men stands in
the occasion of begetting, and faith of chastity: but, so
far as pertains unto the People of God, also in the
sanctity of the sacrament, by reason of which it is
unlawful for one who leaves her husband, even when
she has been put away, to be married to another, so
long as her husband lives, no not even for the sake of
bearing children:  . . . not even where that very thing,
wherefore it takes place, follows not, is the marriage
bond loosed, save by the death of the husband or
wife.�
[Footnote: >. n102 St. Augustin: On The Trinity;  pp.
402, 406, 412]

The aim of repentance is reconciliation with people
and with God.  St. Jerome (340-420 A.D.)  stated that
"a wife who has been put away, may not, so long as
her husband lives, be married to another, or at all
events that her duty is to be reconciled to her
husband.">103 God is Love and forgiveness, and most
people aren�t.  Matt. 5:23,24 and 18:15-18 tell about
repentance�s reconciliation and how to do it, but when
dealing with so-called sinning �brothers/sister�>168 and the
snared/dead/blind/foolish/ manipulated unsaved>169
reconciliation may not be possible just like fellowship,
communion, accord, and agreement>170 are not
usually possible or sometimes not even desired with
such folks.  You repent and right the wrong if possible
for your sake and the name of God whether or not
reconciliation ever takes place. Your repentance does
not depend on the cooperation, or lack of it, of the
victim/witness. If they wont cooperate, then you are
responsible to do the right you know to do, and you
are not responsible to do the right you are unable to
do if it requires the cooperation of someone who is
unwilling to cooperate.
[Footnotes:>.n103 A Select Library of the Nicene and
Post-Nicene Fathers of
The Christian Church,Vol. VIII; p.353.     >168  (1 Cor.
5:9-12; 2 Thess. 3:6-14).
>169  (2 Tim. 2:25,26; Ephes. 2:1,2; Psalm 1 and 14).
>170 (2Cor. 6:14,15).]

Before God you must render that which is due >171
by covenant with your rejected wife.  If a Christian brother
remarried in adultery, it seems that any vows/ covenants he
made with his new wife of adultery, if she were indeed
free to marry him, would still be as binding as those he
made with any creditor, employer or neighbor.  Remarried to
his rejected wife in godly sorrow and repentance, any lawful
and right covenants he made with the wife of his  adultery
(and his children by her) that don�t involve the adultery
would still be binding on him and in honor he would
be bound by his nonadulterous covenants with her
and theirs.  Situations like these demand of our
leaders the wisdom of Solomon and bold and
authoritative teaching from the Word of God about
these issues.
[Footnote: >171  (Rom. 13:7-10; 1 Cor. 7:1-5)]

What about conflicting vows and/or covenants?  We
are not our own and we are bought with a price >172 so we
have no authority to vow or covenant to do something
contrary to the will of God.  Even in the Old Testament the
husband could void any vow made by his wife that was
unacceptable to him as her husband, and the father of
a daughter could void any vow made by his
daughte>173  .  As a member of the Bride of Christ, as
His bond slave, as His child, He can and surely does void any
vow or covenant that we might make that is contrary to His
will.
[Footnotes:>172  (1 Cor. 6).     >173  Numbers 30:1-16]

What if the vows or covenants do not involve sin, but
they contradict each other?  Wouldn't the vow or covenant
made first take priority over any contradictory vow or
covenant made later---all other things being equal?
What if a person made a set of vows/covenants and
later  found that some of that set of vows/covenants were
sinful, contrary to the will of God or voided by another
vow/covenant made earlier?  Wouldn't only those few vows/
covenants that were wrong be voided by God, leaving
standing the rest of the vows/covenants made? When
it comes to vows and covenants we need to be very
careful to obey James 5:12A>.Ap#7   If we do stick
our necks out in a vow/covenant not according to
James 4:15, then we need to know that God has no
pleasure in fools so we need to keep our word>174
[Footnotes: >.Ap#7 See Appendix #7.p#7 and James
4:13-17A.       >174
(Eccles. 5:2-7; Psalm 116:14;; 66:13,14; 15:4; Ezek
17:15-20; Rom. 1:31)]

But Gorki may say, "What about my new mate, Lara,
and the children we have had since I repudiated (or
etc.) Slavania and married Lara?" God's grace and love
is big enough for the whole world, as well as his legal
but new mate-in-sin Lara and his new children-in-
adultery.  Gorki is still under God's command of Eph. 6
(etc.) to parent, love and provide for them. But what
about Lara?" You know this happens with professing
Christians  divorcing and remarrying professing
Christians in America today! Well, what about Lara?
If she is bound by God for life to Stanislavski, then
just like King David's Michal (who was "legally"
divorced and remarried), she has to return to her
Christian husband, Stanislavski, to whom she is bound
for life.  Gorki may still love Lara and he may have to
parent his own children, but Lara is bound to
Stanislavski as long as they both live>175 .  See the
discussion "Can you go home again".
[Footnote: >175 (1 Cor. 7; Rom 7)]

Ezekiel 16:59 �For thus says the Lord Jehovah: I will
even deal with you as
you have done, WHO HAVE DESPISED THE OATH, AND
BROKEN THE COVENANT. . . .  17: 15 But he rebelled
against him  . . .  Shall he prosper? shall he escape
that does such things? SHALL HE BREAK THE
COVENANT, AND YET ESCAPE? .  .  . 16 [As] I live, says
the Lord Jehovah, verily in the place of the king that
made him king, WHOSE OATH HE DESPISED, AND
WHOSE COVENANT HE BROKE, even with him, in the
midst of Babylon, shall he die. . . .18 HE DESPISED THE
OATH, AND BROKE THE COVENANT; and behold, he had
given his hand, yet has he done all these things: he
shall not escape.  19 Therefore thus says the Lord
Jehovah: [As] I live, verily, MINE OATH WHICH HE
HAS DESPISED, AND MY COVENANT WHICH HE HAS
BROKEN, EVEN IT WILL I RECOMPENSE UPON HIS
HEAD.  20 AND I WILL SPREAD MY NET UPON HIM,
AND HE SHALL BE TAKEN IN MY SNARE; . . �.

XI. CAN YOU COME BACK TOGETHER AND REMARRY
AFTER ADULTEROUS  REMARRIAGES?

Ezekiel 16: 3  . . .  �Thus says the Lord Jehovah unto
Jerusalem: Your birth and Your nativity is of the land
of the Canaanite: your father was an Amorite, and
your mother a Hittite.  8 And I passed by you, and
looked upon you, and behold, your time was the time
of love; and I spread my skirt over you, and covered
your nakedness; and I SWORE UNTO YOU, AND
ENTERED INTO A COVENANT WITH YOU says the Lord
Jehovah, and you became mine.  . . . 15 � But you did
confide in your beauty, and played the harlot because
of your renown, and poured out your whoredoms on
every one that passed by: his it was. . . . . 32 O
adulterous wife, that takes strangers instead of her
husband.  59 For thus says the Lord Jehovah: I will
even deal with you as you have done, WHO HAVE
DESPISED THE OATH, AND BROKEN THE COVENANT.
60 � Nevertheless I will remember MY  COVENANT
with you in the days of your youth, and I will
establish unto you an everlasting covenant.  61 And
you shall remember your ways, and be confounded,  .
.  I will give them unto you for daughters, but not by
virtue of YOUR COVENANT.   62 And I will establish
MY COVENANT WITH YOU, and you shall  know that I
[am] Jehovah;  63 that you may remember, and be
ashamed, and no more open your mouth because of
your confusion, when I forgive you all that  you have
done, says the Lord Jehovah.�

Should I go back to my godly mate from whom I, a
born again believer, was divorced while we were both in the
Lord? What does the Word say?  Consider God's example, the
model he sets for us.
       Hosea 9: 1 � �Rejoice not, Israel, exultingly, as
the peoples; for you have gone a whoring from your
God, you have loved harlot's hire upon every corn-
floor.  11: 7 Yea, my people are bent upon backsliding
from me: though they call them to the Most High,
none at all exalts [him].  8 � How shall I give you
over, Ephraim? [how] shall I deliver you up, Israel?
how shall I make you as Admah? [how] shall I set you
as Zeboim? My heart is turned within me, my
repentings are kindled together.  9 I will not execute
the fierceness of mine anger . . .  14:1 � O Israel,
return unto Jehovah your God; for you have fallen by
your iniquity.  2 Take with you words, and turn to
Jehovah; say unto him, Forgive all iniquity, and
receive [us] graciously; so will we render the calves of
our lips. . . . neither will we say any more to the work
of our hands, [You are] our God; because in you the
fatherless finds mercy.  4 � I will heal their
backsliding, I will love them freely; for mine anger is
turned away from him.  5 I will be as the dew unto
Israel: he shall blossom as the lily, and cast forth his
roots as Lebanon. . . .  7 They shall return and sit
under his shadow; they shall revive [as] corn, and
blossom as the vine: .  . . 9 Who is wise, and he shall
understand these things? intelligent, and he shall
know them? For the ways of Jehovah are right, and
the just shall walk in them; but the transgressors shall
fall therein.�

       Gen. 2:24 �Therefore shall a man leave his
father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife;
and they shall be one flesh.>104.  For the permanence
of the relationship the focus is on the word "cleave"
which in the Hebrew means "cling or adhere;  . . .
abide fast, cleave (fast together), follow close (hard
after), be joined (together), keep (fast), overtake,
pursue hard, stick, take.">105.  Thayer says it means
"to glue upon, glue to">106. If God commands the
husband to conduct himself in this manner towards
his wife, then he had better do it if he wants a good
future with God, because to disobey would be
death>176  . Being under this command would
certainly bind a man to his wife as long as both lived.
[Footnotes>104. King James Version. The Holy
Scriptures According to the Masoretic Text agrees with the
meaning.     >105.  Strong''s Exhaustive Concordance.   >106.
Greek English Lexicon of the New
Testament; Joseph
Henry Thayer, D.D.; American Book Co., New York,
1889 .     >176  Rom. 1:28-32; 1 Cor. 5:5-11;
11:30,31,32.]

The Jewish Septuagint (third century B.C.) for Gen.
2:24 uses the same word for "cleave" that Jesus uses in Matt.
19:5.  The word used for cleave in the LXX's Gen. 2:24 and
Jesus' Matt. 19:5 means the following: 1. According to
Thayer --- "to join one's self to closely, cleave to, stick
to"; and 2. According to Arndt & Gingrich ---"adhere closely
to, be faithfully devoted to, join �tini�  someone">107 .   The
Greek tense in both is future indicative passive which
means that this is what they shall have themselves
doing in the future on a regular basis.  You say that it is not a
command?  Jesus seems to differ with you both in Malachi 2,
where He says the husband who breaks his marital
agreement with his wife is under His wrath, and in
Matt 19:6 where Jesus says "So then, they are no longer two
but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, man
must not separate." Based on the truth of Ephes. 1:11  (He
"works all things according to the counsel of His own will")
and Rom. 13:1-3 ("For there is no power but of God; the
authorities that be are ordained by God"), every legal and
moral marriage is ordained or allowed by God and takes
place under His control, so indeed God has joined
them.  That's why we can trust God with 1 Cor. 7:17-
28, that we are to remain married to the person we
are married to when we are saved. So in this case,
even 1 Cor. 7 speaks of the binding nature of
marriage.  So Jesus makes binding >177 the
cleaving>178 and the one flesh experience that we
know as marriage.
[Footnotes:{>.{n107 A GREEK-ENGLISH LEXICON OF THE
NEW TESTAMENT and Other Early Christian Literature
; By W.F.Arndt & F. W. Gingric.       >177 (Mt. 19:6).
>178  (Mt. 19:5).]

What do the experts say? There is no controversy that
marriages, divorces, and remarriages that happened before
one was saved are not binding on the new convert to Christ.
The case of the one who is saved while married to an
unsaved  person has some controversy>179 .  But what is the
Word for those Christians who have married, divorced and
remarried all since they were genuinely and fruitfully saved
and walking in loving obedience to the Savior?  Consider
the following:
[Footnote: >179 1 Corinth. 7:12,13,14,15]

�In the present modern tangle of marriage, divorce,
and remarriage the Christian Church, in dealing with
converts and repentant members, is often
compelled to accept the situation as it is.�>108
[Footnote: >..n108  The New Bible Dictionary, J.D.
Douglas Ph.D. p..790.]

�In the NT divorce seems to be forbidden absolutely. .
Our Lord teaches that the OT permission was a
concession to a low moral standard, and was opposed
to the ideal of marriage as an inseparable union of
body and soul. . . But remarriage also closes the door
to reconciliation, which on Christian principles ought
always to be possible; cf. the teaching of Hosea and
Jer. 3; Hermas [2nd Cent. AD] (Mand. iv.1) allows no
re-marriage, and lays great stress on the taking back
of a repentant wife.�>109
[Footnote: >..n109  HASTINGS DICTIONARY OF THE
BIBLE;  p. 586.]

�To such a degree is that marriage compact entered
upon a matter of a certain sacrament, that it is not
made void even by separation itself, since, so long as
her husband lives, even by whom she hath been left,
she commits adultery, in case she be married to
another: and he who hath left her, is the cause of this
evil. . . Seeing that the compact of marriage is not
done away by divorce intervening; so that they
continue wedded persons one to another, even after
separation; and commit adultery with those, with
whom they shall be joined, even after their own
divorce, either the woman with a man, or the man
with a woman. . . But a marriage once for all entered
upon in the City of our god, where, even from the first
union of the two, the man and the woman, marriage
bears a certain sacramental character, can no way be
dissolved but by the death of one of them. . .
Therefore the good of marriage throughout all nations
and all men stands in the occasion of begetting, and
faith of chastity: but, so far as pertains unto the
People of God, also in the sanctity of the sacrament,
by reason of which it is unlawful for one who leaves
here husband, even when she has been put away, to
be married to another, so long as her husband lives,
no not even for the sake of bearing children:  . . . not
even where that very thing, wherefore it takes place,
follows not, is the marriage bond loosed, save by the
death of the husband or wife.�>75
[Footnote:  >. 75 St. Augustin: On The Trinity;  pp. 402,
406, 412. ]

Since the only terms of divorce are given in Deut
24:1-4 which was superseded by Matt. 19:1-15 and 1 Cor.
7:10-15,39, it is clear that marriage is a life long relationship
based on the covenants of the couple and on God's
command not to be put asunder or put asunder the
relationship.  What about Deut. 24:1-5?  Does it set some
kind of precedent or establish some kind of
principle that would loose a godly couple from the
binding nature of their relationship before God?
       Deut. 23:13  =  �and you shall have a trowel on
your girdle; and it shall come to pass when you would
relieve yourself abroad, that you shall dig with it, and shall
bring  back the earth and cover your {nuisance}.  14 Because
the Lord your God walks in your camp to deliver you . . . and
your camp shall be holy, and there shall not appear in
you A {DISGRACEFUL THING}>111. , and so  he  shall
turn away from you. . . �
[Footnote: >111. {caps mine}; same Hebrew words in
both Dt. 23:14 as in Dt 24:3 in LXX.]
       Deut. 24:3= �And if any one should take a wife,
and should dwell with her, then it shall come to pass
if she should not have found favour before him,
because he has found some {UNBECOMING THING}
>111. in her, that he shall write for her a bill of
divorcement and give it into her hands, and he shall
send her away out of his house.   4. And if she should
go away and be married to another man;  5. and the
last husband should hate her, and write for her a bill
of divorcement; and should give it into her hands, and
send her away out of his house, and the last husband
should die, who took here to himself for a wife; 6. the
former husband who sent her away shall not be able
to return and take her to himself for a wife, after she
has been defiled; because it is an abomination before
the Lord your God, and you shall not defile the land
which the Lord thy God gives you to inherit.�>112.
[Old English updated]
[Footnote: *>111. ditto: caps mine; same Hebrew words
in both Dt. 23:14 as in Dt 24:3 in LXX.      >112. Please
see The Septuagint Version; 1972; Zondervan
Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Mich.]

Deut. 23:15.  . . � that He see no {UNSEEMLY
THING}>113. in thee, and turn away from thee.�  Deut.
24:1-4 . . . �because he hath found some
{UNSEEMLY>114.   THING}>115. in her,  . . .�>116.
[Footnote: (>113.  caps mine; same Hebrew word in
Deut 23:15 as in Deut 24:1.       >114. "unseemly thing"
= American Standard Version; Thomas Nelson; 1901.
>115.  {caps mine}; same Hebrew word in Deut 23:15
as in Deut 24:1.         >116.  The Holy Scriptures
According to the Masoretic Text]

Deut. 23:14  . .  .  �He must not see anything
{INDECENT}>117. among you lest  He turn away from
you. . .� Deut. 24:1-4 . . . �he has found some
{INDECENCY}>118. in her. . �>119.
[Footnote: >117. {caps} mine; same Hebrew word in
Deut 23:14 as in Deut 24:1.      >118. ditto:{caps} mine;
same Hebrew word in Deut 23:14 as in Deut
24:1.     . . >119.  Holy Bible New American Standard;
1977.]

       Thank God for the originals so that we can see
that the Hebrew word used in Deut 23 is the same as
used in Deut. 24, and that it apparently means
anything deemed or decreed by God to be unholy, a
sin or an abomination.  In Deut 23 that includes
human feces and excrement which God made know by
law to His people that it was unclean and defiling in
His eyes.  Using the Word the way the Spirit used the
Word would enable us to understand that whatever
the husband found in the wife that was "unseemly" or
"indecent", was something expressly and explicitly
declared by God  to be unholy and defiling in His
Word.  This included any of the bodily ailments that
resulted in an unnatural excretion or flow of bodily
fluids, things like leprosy, running
sores, and figurative things that made you unholy like
idolatry and breaking the commandments of God through
Moses.

The word rendered "indecency" in the phrase "he has
found some indecency"  means something expressly and
explicitly declared by God  to be unholy and defiling in His
Word, including any of the bodily ailments that resulted in
an unnatural excretion or flow of bodily fluids, things
like leprosy, running sores, and figurative things that made
you unholy like idolatry and breaking the commandments of
God through Moses.  The word rendered "defiled" in the
phrase " not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since
she has been defiled" is used by God of sexual
defilement>180 , spiritual defilement >181 defilement by
death or bodily emissions>182 .
[Footnote: >180  (Gen. 34:5,13; Lev. 18:24; Num. 5:13-
29).     >181 (Lev. 19:31; Ezek. 22:4; 23:7).      >182
(Lev. 15:32; 21:1-3).]

This means that the "indecency" or "unseemliness"
that led Benhadad to divorce Lohana could be the same
"defilement" that makes the situation so that he cannot
remarry her.  Specifically, Lohana could either have been an
unbelieving Jewess or a Jewess with an abnormal
external flow of bodily fluids, both of which were unseemly,
unholy and indecent according to the Sinai Law of Moses.   If
Lohana was divorced by Benhadad for this unholy
indecency, remarried Abdullah while still unholy and
indecent and then divorced again or widowed by Abdullah--
---still all the while an unbelieving Jewess or a Jewess with
the  abnormal external flow of bodily fluids.  The
problem that led Benhadad to divorce Lohana is still
her problem after the remarriage and the divorce, a problem
that makes her and marriage to her unholy, unseemly
and/or indecent according to the Law of Moses.

For him to remarry her would be the fulfillment of
Prov. 26:11 and 2 Pt. 2:22 where " . . . 'A dog returns to his
own vomit',  and,  'a sow, having washed, to her wallowing in
the mire.'".  This is not and would not be acceptable to God.
This fits well with the after-Moses OT precedents found in
Ezra and Nehemiah  where God commanded that the
people divorce those whom they disobeyed Him to
marry, who were idolaters and lived in disobedience
to His Word, people with whom God had forbidden
marriage.  For a Jew to have remarried  one of these
wives would have been the unholiness of flagrant
disobedience.  That the disqualifying thing in these
wives was their spiritual heritage rather than their
race is obvious by the fact that God did not forbid
marriage to believing Egyptians (Joseph), Philistines
(Samson), Syrians, Assyrians or Ethiopian Cushites
(Moses), etc.

The same principles work in the Church of today.  We
know that it is unholy and therefore unacceptable to marry a
"saint" living in sin>183 , or to marry an unbeliever>184 .
Now if I married someone who called herself a believer, but
because of problems that surfaced after the wedding we had
to do Matt. 18:15-17-20 and she turned out to be a
"heathen", I would have had grounds to divorce her in OT
times according to Deut 24, but now under the Law of Christ
in 1 Cor. 7: 12-15 I am not free to divorce her unless
she is unwilling to live with me or has left me.  If she
became unwilling to live with me and then left me, I
would be free from her maritally and free to remarry.
For me to remarry her still in her "heathen"
unholiness/defilement would be a sin in violation of
the Scriptures120 , and an abomination to God.
[Footnote: >183 1 Cor. 5; 2 Thess. 3:6-14; 2 Tim. 3:5; 1
Tim.6:5.     >184  (2 Cor. 6:14-7:1).      >.n120  Please
see Appendix Five.]

If you can accept the preceding understanding of
Deut. 23 & 24, a woman divorced for unholiness is not to be
taken back by her husband in her unholiness,  then there is
no problem from these passages for a godly brother
to remarry his godly wife who,  in ignorance or in a
snare by the enemy >185, divorced him or was divorced by
him and had gone on and married someone else.
[Footnote: >185 2 Tim. 2:24-26; Gal. 6:1; 1 Cor. 5:5-11 +
2 Cor 2).]

If you understand the unholy indecency of the
woman in Deut. 24 to be some specific violation of God's  Law
of Moses, an unholy indecency which caused her to be
divorced and forbids her former husband from remarrying
her because such a remarriage would violate some
specific Law of Moses ----- then there is no application of
this passage to two born again and godly saints today who, in
ignorance or in a snare by the enemy>186 , were divorced
and had gone on and remarried others, but now,
acknowledging the Word of God that they are bound
as husband and wife for life (1 Cor. 7 & Rm. 7), want
to remarry in repentance.
[Footnote: >186 2 Tim. 2:24-26; Gal. 6:1; 1 Cor. 5:5-11 +
2 Cor 2)]

Some Christians say you �cannot go back, once you�ve
remarried�>187 .   They cite Deuteronomy 24:1-4 as
their proof text.  First of all, we know that we are not
under that command according to Ephesians
2:14,15,16; Colossians 2:13-17 and Acts 15.  Secondly,
it cannot be argued that it is a "higher-than-the-law-
of-Moses" principle of defilement and uncleanness.
Yes God did keep the king from defiling Abraham's
Sarah.  But the same God blessed the marriage of the
very defiled harlot Rahab so that she became a direct
ancestor of both King David and Jesus.  His Word in
Deut. 24:1-4 is followed by his Word in Deut. 25:5-10
that the defiled-by-former-husbands widows were to
be married to their brother-in-laws etc>.   Ruth, a
defiled-by-former-husband widow, was blessed in
her marriage with Boaz so that she also became a
direct ancestor of King David and Jesus.  Jesus
commands the church defiled-by-former-husband
widows to remarry in the Lord in 1 Timothy 5.
[Footnote: >187  Deut. 24:1-4; Matt. 5:17-20; Luke
16:17.

No where in the Word of God does it say that your
remarriage in adultery looses you from God�s binding
Christian-you to your Christian mate for life>188.  Jesus
plainly states that Deut. 24:1-4 was given because of the
hardness of their hearts>189 not because it was the
best thing to do.  Christians have been given �new hearts�
and were released from Deut. 24:1-4 by the Lord in Ephes.
2:14,15 and Colos.2:13,14.  So what do Christian-you
do about the Christian mate that Christian-you
divorced and you married another in adultery>190 ,
or about your Christian mate who divorced Christian-
you and then married another in adultery>191 ?
[Footnote: >188.  Romans 7:1-5; 1 Corinth. 7:3-11,39.
>189  (Matt. 19:8).      >190  Mark 10:11,12; Luke
16:18; 1 Cor. 7:10,11.       >191  Mark 10:11,12; Luke
16:18; 1 Cor. 7:10,11.]

While still being bound to your Christian mate, you
may have to separate from, or perhaps even divorce, your
Christian mate as part of the Church�s discipline of your
�Christian� mate who is living in sin>192   Since the
purpose of Church discipline is to result in repentance
and reconcilia-tion>193 , the separation/divorce
should be seen as a temporary measure, unless  the
Lord puts the sinning saint to �sleep� in death>194 ,
or turns out to be an unbeliever>195    If there is
repentance by your adulterous and remarried
Christian mate, should you be reconciled to your
repentant mate?  Since you two are bound maritally
for life by the Lord, I would hope so.  What does God
say?  Because of John 8 and Eph. 2 and Colos. 2 we
don�t stone to death adulterers and adulteresses.
Because of 1 Corinth 7:10-15,39; and Romans 7:1-5
we don�t just walk away and disown our mates.  In
the Church's Ecumenical Council, the African Code of
A.D. 419 stated that "It seemed good that according to
evangelical and apostolical discipline a man who had
been put away from his wife, and a woman put away
from her husband should not be married to another,
but so should remain, or else be reconciled the one to
the other. . .">121
[Footnote: >192 Romans 16:17;1 Corint. 5:9-11; Eph.
5:11; 2 Thess. 3:6-14;1Tim. 6:3-5; 2 Tim. 3:1-5; Matt.
18:15-20.     >193  (2 Corinth 2 and 7).     >194 1
Corinth. 5:4-8; 11:28-32.      >195   Matthew 18:15-18.
>.n121  A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene
Fathers of The Christian Church,Vol. XIV; p. 493.]

King David took his wife Michal back after she had
been given in marriage to another, with God�s
blessing>.196.  Some might say that he took her back
but wasn't intimate with her, as he did with the
wives/concubines that his son raped>197.  That
doesn't seem to be the case with Michal because the
Holy Spirit made a point of the fact that He caused her
to be barren AFTER she had returned to David from
her other husband-in-adultery>.198  If he brought
Michal back but was not intimate with her there
would have been no point to God making her barren.
So apparently David was being intimate with Michal
after her adultery but God made sure she was barren
after her sin.
[Footnote: ~>.~196.  1 Sam. 25:44; 2 Sam. 3:13-16.
>197.  2 Sam 16:21,22; 19:5; 20:3.      #>.#198.   1 Sam
25; 2 Sam 6:16-23.]

Hosea the prophet was told by God to marry an
unfaithful woman and then to take her back as wife
after she had been unfaithful to him.  In Ezekiel 16
and 23 God presents Himself as a husband who takes
back his unfaithful wife.  So there is a place for
reconciliation and reunion of two obedient believers
who are bound for life but who sinned by divorcing
and remarrying.  There are grounds for leaving an
adulterous marriage and going  back to the Christian
mate to whom you are bound for life.

So why the Word in Deut. 24:1-4 about not taking
back your ex-wife after she has remarried? Jesus tells
us that Deut. 24:1-4 was given because of the
hardness>199.  of their hearts, not because it was
God's best for them.  Jesus
overruled Deut. 24 and restored His Law that made
divorce itself just as much an abomination>200.  as
the "abomination" of taking back your ex-wife after
she had been married to somebody else.  Perhaps
Deut. 24 and it hardness-of-heart rule was a
temporary attempt by God to discourage divorce, at
least frivolous divorce.  Whatever the reason, it
wasn't just a defilement issue, because the Deut. 25:5-
10; Rahab & Ruth 4; David & Michal, Hosea passages
make it clear that there is and was no sin or
defilement in marrying a woman who had been
"defiled" by her former husband (David and Abigail,
Ruth and Boaz) or some other man (Rahab the harlot)
before the current marriage.
[Footnote: >199.  Matthew 19:1-19.     ^>.^200.  Malachi
2.]

The Holy Spirit did not restate or reinstate the
hardness-of-heart rule in the cases of 1 Tim. 5:10-14, or 1
Cor. 7:15, 39 or Romans 7:1-5.  The only restrictions on
remarriage  were that they be "in the Lord", which at least
means within the Lord's explicit will and marrying
someone who is in the Lord.  Everything in John 8; Gal. 6:1;
Mat. 18:15-18; 2 Cor. ch. 2 and ch. 7; Hosea, Ezekiel etc.  all
call for accepting back the repentant and believing
mate who fell in adultery and has heard Jesus say, "Go
and sin no more!"

XII.  WHAT ABOUT THE HEALTH QUESTIONS
INVOLVED IN     SUCH  REUNIONS?

What if my repentant and returning mate has HIV or
AIDS?  If you have
dependent children to raise, you have some hard
planning and decision making ahead of you.  I can
only offer my untried opinions.  You must seek the
Lord in fasting and prayer in this.  The thought that
comes to my mind is that of St. Francis of Assisi
ministering to the lepers to the risk of himself and his
beloved brethren.  I think again of the beloved saint
in Hawaii who ministered to the lepers in his leper
colony and finally contracted it and died himself as a
leper.  And I think of Christ who fleshed Himself in
this world of leprous sin, lived with we spiritually
leprous sinners, and then voluntarily died, taking all
our leprous sin into His own pure and sinless body.

Isn't He our Master?  Isn't that His way? Aren't we
called to follow in His footsteps>207 ?  Did He dodge and
forego the suffering He was called to for us?  Can we do any
less as His Ambassadors?  Isn't He the same Christ who
indwells us and lives in us, our very life, and would
He shrink from laying down His life in you for your mate
who has AIDS but needs your marital sex according to 1 Cor.
7:2,3,4; and Prov. 5:18,19,20 in order to avoid the deadly
temptations>208 that will come if you don't meet you
mate's needs?  They knew Him by the nail prints in His
hands.  Would it be too much for Him to ask you to be known
by the AIDS of your needy mate in whom He also dwells?  Is
not His grace sufficient in every need and crisis?  Can't
you depend on Him to keep His Word to not let you be
tried in this life more than you are able to bear>209 ?
Read your Bible, Amy Carmichael's Rose from Briar,
Amy's Gold Cord, Corrie Ten Boom's writings!  Our God
is able and we are a people called to take up our cross
daily, laying down our lives for our brethren.  I
believe the same scriptures that compelled Peter
Elliot to risk his life and be martyred in Ecuador -
compel the saved mate to respond according to 1 Cor.
7:2,3,4,5 to the genuine marital sex needs of their
saved, repentant and returning mate.
[Footnote: >207  (1 Peter 2:21,22,23,24).    >208  (1Cor.
7:5).      >209  (1 Cor. 10:13)]

Of course if the infected wife had the gift of
continence, having no need of
marital sex and was free from temptation, and so was
able to deny herself
her right so that her beloved mate need not be
exposed, that would be the way to go for them.
Sometimes something as easy as asking  and
endocrinologist to help a Christian male medically
lower his testosterone level to the lowest safe level
can so lessen the intensity of the aching needs and
appetites that they cease to be a problem.  But he
would need to do it with the doctor monitoring him
since we now know that hormonal imbalances can
result in tumors and cancers. But we each have our
gift>210, and even AIDS doesn't change those marital
gifts which physically and mentally express
themselves  powerfully as aching needs and
compelling appetites, as 1 Cor. 7:9 & 1 Tim. 5:11-14
and the practicers of Prov. 5:18,19,20 can tell you.
[Footnote: >210 (1 Cor. 7)]

XIII. CAN ADULTERY, DIVORCE , VOWS AND
REPENTANCE RESULT IN POLYGYNY OR CONCUBINAGE?

We are called to speak  Truth to each other (Eph.4) by
the God Who is the Truth.We are called to serve the
God who cannot lie.  Our God calls us to be a people
whose mouths reflect His Light and Truth.  The
passages below show us that He expects us to be
honorable and honest in the agrteements,
understanding and contracts we have and make with
each other.  If we want His blessing, we will provide
honest things in the sight of all so as not to give the
adversaries an opportunity to blaspheme God or God's
work  in your life.  Consider the se:
MKJV PSALM 116:13 �I will take the cup of salvation,
and call on the name of the LORD. 14 I will pay my
vows to the LORD now in the presence of all His
people.�
MKJV PSALM 66:13 � �I will go into Your house with
burnt offerings; I will
pay You my vows,14 [those] which my lips have
uttered and my mouth has
spoken in my trouble.�
DBY PSALM 15: �Jehovah, who shall sojourn in your
tent?  . . . 2 He that walks uprightly . . .who, if he have
sworn to his own hurt, changes it not; . . �
YLT ECCLES 5:4 � �When thou vowest a vow to God,
delay not to complete it, for there is no pleasure in
fools; that which thou vowest--complete.  5 Better
that thou do not vow, than that thou dost vow and
dost not complete.   6 Suffer not thy mouth to cause
thy flesh to sin, nor say before the messenger, that `it
[is] an error,' why is God wroth because of thy voice,
and hath destroyed the work of thy hands?�
MKJV EZEKIEL 17:13 �And he has taken of the king's
seed and has made a covenant with him, and has taken an
oath from him. He has also taken the mighty of the land, 14
so that the kingdom might be low, that it might not lift
itself up, [but] that by keeping his covenant it might
stand. 15 But he rebelled against him in sending his
ambassadors into Egypt, to give him horses and
many people. Shall he be blessed? Shall he who does
such [things] escape? Or SHALL HE BREAK THE COVENANT
AND BE DELIVERED? 16 [As] I live, says the Lord Jehovah,
surely in the place of the king who made him king, WHOSE
OATH HE DESPISED AND WHOSE COVENANT HE BROKE, even
with him in the midst of Babylon he shall die. . . . 18
And HE HAS DESPISED THE OATH BY BREAKING THE
COVENANT. And, behold, HE HAD GIVEN HIS HAND,
AND HAS DONE ALL THESE, HE SHALL NOT ESCAPE. 19
Therefore so says the Lord Jehovah: [As] I live, surely
MY OATH THAT HE HAS DESPISED, AND MY
COVENANT THAT HE HAS BROKEN, I WILL EVEN
REPAY IT ON HIS OWN HEAD. . . . I WILL JUDGE HIM
THERE WITH HIS SIN WHICH HE HAS SINNED
AGAINST ME�.
KJV ROMANS 1:28  . . . �God gave them over to a
reprobate mind, to do those things which are not
convenient; . . . covenantbreakers,  . . . 32 Who
knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit
such things are worthy of death, not only do the same,
but have pleasure in them that do them.�

If American and legally married John legally marries
free-to-marry Betty, it is a sin because John is under
command>211 to obey the laws of the
government authorities which forbids official/legal
bigamy and polygyny  and he would have to live with
the legal consequences but I don't believe that
would nullify the covenants he made with Betty. The
covenants that are not covenants-to-sin could still be
binding for the two  in the Lord.  So bigamy is illegal,
Christians divorce Christians who are bound by the
Lord to each other as long as both live, and Christians
go on and marry others while still bound by the Lord
to their ex�s under the banner of forgiveness. This
combination has very complicated outcomes,
consequences  and effects which may include
marriage, separation, polygyny , concubinage,
adultery and/or fornication.  Please read on.
[Footnote: >211   (Romans 13; 1 Peter 2:12-14)]

What about this saved but separated and chaste wife?
It seemed to me to be quite unfair that she could leave him
and live  unmarried, and we have seen that he, knowing he
is still bound to her for life, has to struggle with the
burning temptations predicted in 1 Corinth. 7:1-5, 9
with no legitimate sexual outlet.  The double standard
of male polygyny  seems to favor the male, while the
double standard of the wife�s ability to separate
(remaining chaste while the male may not separate)
seems to favor the female.

St. Augustine (4th Cent AD) had a powerful way of
stating the permanent nature of the marriage of two who
married after being born again, lovingly obedient to Jesus
and fruitful in the Spirit---
       �To such a degree is that marriage compact
entered upon a matter of a certain sacrament, that it
is not made void even by separation itself, since,
so long as her husband lives, even by whom she hath
been left, she commits adultery, in case she be married to
another: and he who hath left her, is the cause of this evil. . .
Seeing that the compact of marriage is not done away by
divorce intervening; so that they continue wedded
persons one to another, even after separation; and commit
adultery with those, with whom they shall be joined, even
after their own divorce, either the woman with a man, or
the man with a woman. . . But a marriage once for all
entered upon in the City of our god>122,  where, even
from the first union of the two, the man and the
woman, marriage bears a certain sacramental
character, can no way be dissolved but by the death
of one of them. . . Therefore the good of marriage
throughout all nations and all men stands in the
occasion of begetting, and faith of chastity: but, so far
as pertains unto the People of God, also in the sanctity
of the sacrament, by reason of which it is unlawful for
one who leaves here husband, even when she has
been put away, to be married to another, so long as
her husband lives, no not even for the sake of bearing
children:  . . . not even where that very thing,
wherefore it takes place, follows not, is the marriage
bond loosed, save by the death of the husband or
wife.�>123
[Footnotes:>122 This footnote mark etc. is not St.
Augustine's or Arthur Haddan's.  I insert it just in case the
reader is not aware of the fact that all marriages between
real saints take place "in the City of our god" not
according to St. Augustine, but according the the Holy
Spirit in Hebrews
11:10,13-19, where they are already seated with
Christ in the Heavenlies according to Eph. 1 & 2.        >123  St.
Augustin: On The Trinity;  pp. 402, 406,
412.]

If she divorces him so she can live alone>212 , and he
remarries a �sister� without rejecting/repudiating/denying/
forsaking her who divorced him (so there is no adultery, see
Mark 10:9-11),  then yes it is legal in America and both she
who wants to be alone and she who married him are both
bound to him as long as he lives.  She who divorces him to be
alone is bound by Law as long as he lives, and she who
married this rejected and abandoned man is
bound both God�s Law and the law of man to him>.
Under  God�s Law the two are bound to him as long as
he lives.  There is nothing in scripture that
contradicts this.  We have seen that polygyny is not a
sin and an evil.  It is against the law and tradition of
America and a saint must obey the laws of
America>213 as long as they don�t require us to
disobey God.  That is man�s tradition, not God�s.
[Footnote: >212  (1 Cor. 7:11).      >213  (Rom. 13).]

In the Old Testament and New Testament times (4000
B.C. to 100 AD) polygyny  and concubinage were practiced by
Israel, Egypt, Babylon, Greece and Rome according to Jewish
historians like Josephus.  Yes, officially being
married to two women in America is illegal by man's
laws and those laws have to be obeyed if possible,  but an
informal/private covenant relationship between a married
man and another woman besides his wife is concubinage, a
practice as old as Jacob, Lea and Rachel in Genesis 22 (Lea's
and Rachel's handmaidens/ concubines with whom Jacob
fathered the heads of the 12 tribes) and is not illegal in
America and is practiced on every continent on earth. A
"mistress" is not a concubine in Biblical terms because a
concubine is maritally bound to her husband by covenants
and by the same scriptures as bind a wife to her husband,
while a mistress is what the Bible calls a harlot in Ezekiel 16
and 23. Please see the full polygyny discussion enclosed.

Keeping one's marital vows/covenants can indeed
result in polygyny, especially if done in repentance to a
sinful divorce or an adulterous remarriage on the  part of
one or both of the saved marital partners who abide by God's
Word, that they are bound by God maritally as long as both
of them live.  The foundation for believing that you or your
mate is saved would be the following fruits of the
Spirit, produced in the believer by the empowering of
Christ: (1) They were legally and honorably married,
before the divorce etc.;  (2) They both had consistent
public testimony of their salvation; (3) Their lives
were consistent with the Word at home and away
from home; (4) They both were compassionately and
effectively involved in nurturing and shepherding
Christian fellowship; (5) They were both characterized
by the fruits of the Spirit instead of the works of the
flesh; (6) They were faithfully in the Word in a life
changing way; and (7) They were faithfully in prayer
on a regular basis.  If any of the above are missing,
you have good cause to question the salvation of the
person in question, which should move you to
intercessory prayer and Matt. 18: 15-18.  One of the
best ways to resolve the question of a persons
salvation is to exercise the Mat. 18:15-18 procedure
in the manner of 2 Tim. 2:24-26.  It would clarify the
situation by showing you if your case was that of 1
Cor. 7:10,11,39 or that of 1 Cor. 7:12-15.

How can vows result in polygyny for a genuinely
saved brother?  His vows
could lead to his polygyny.  He marries Sophia, both
genuinely saved and free to marry in the Lord, and
they vowed/covenanted to have each other to be
husband and wife to each other, pledging their troth
in all honor, love, duty, service, faith and tenderness,
to cherish and live with each other according to the
ordinance of God,  honoring and keeping each other in
the holy bond of marriage.  Before God and other
witnesses they promised and covenanted to be each
others comforting, loving and faithful mate; in plenty
and in lack, in joy and grief; in infirmity and health;
as long as they both live.

Then Sophia decides to exercise the sin/repentance
option of leaving him and living chastely separated
from him>214 as long as he lives.  He comes under the
tormenting temptation predicted in 1 Cor. 7:5 & 9, and
so finding himself burning and or failing to control
himself, he obeys God's command to marry and
marries genuinely  saved Serena.   Serena accepts him
even though he and Serena both know that he is still
bound before the Lord to Sophia as husband.  For him
to reject, repudiate and forsake his marital bond to
Sophia in order to marry Serena would make him an
adulterer and his marriage to Serena, adultery>215 .
Acknowledging his marital bond with both Sophia and
Serena he becomes a polygynist, not an adulterer.
Sophia has a change of heart and wants to be married
to him again, but in the USA he can legally be married
to only one wife, so he has to accept her back as his
concubine, fully honoring his vows both Serena and
Sophia.  If Serena doesn't want to be married to an
active polygynist, she can sin by leaving him and
repent by remaining chastely single as long as he
lives.  In thought, word and deed he must love each
according to his vows, since separation or polygyny do
not release him from his vows>124 .
[Footnote: >214  1 Cor. 7:11,39.       >215 (Mark
10:11,12; Luke 16:18).     >124 See Appendices 4 and
7;  (see the pages and scriptures just before the
Bibliography).]

What if Sophia disobeyed God, left her husband, Eli,
and married Raj?  Since she is bound to Eli as long as he
lives, she has committed adultery>216 .  She makes the same
vows to Raj as to Eli, in her adultery.  After experiencing
God's promised chastening>217 she repents, forsaking
her adulterous relations with Raj and either returns to
marital relations with Eli or chastely lives alone.  Raj and
Serena would have to do the sin of adultery to keep their
vow to have and live with each other as husband and wife,
so that vow is nullified (Numbers 30; we are the purchased
bride of Christ = 1 Cor. 6:19,20 --so He nullifies our sinful
vows, our vows to sin.).    Their vows to cherish each
other in all honor, love, duty, service, faith and
tenderness are not sinful and therefore are not
nullified but would have to be exercised chastely and
free of any adulterous elements, at least in fervent
intercessory prayer for each other. The same would
hold true for Eli if he married Poona, Sukkur's lawful
wife, in adultery and then repented of it, forsaking
the adultery of his marital relations with Poona. Their
vows to cherish each other in all honor, love, duty,
service, faith and tenderness are not sinful and
therefore are not nullified but would have to be
exercised chastely and free of any adulterous
elements, at least expressed in fervent intercessory
prayer.
[Footnote: >216  (Mark 10:11,12; Luke 16:18; Rom.7:1-
5).      >217  (1 Cor. 11; Heb. 12).]

What if Kure  and Toegu  Ohtani, a genuinely saved
couple, had made the wedding vow that they would forsake
all others, to keep themselves only to each other as long as
both live?  Dear little Toegu is overwhelmed by the
strains of married life, sins by separating herself from
Kure but repents by living chastely and unmarried>218 .
Kure comes under the tormenting temptation predicted in 1
Cor. 7:5 & 9, and so finding himself burning and or
failing to control himself, he obeys God's command to
marry>125  and marries genuinely saved Kasai, who
accepts Kure even though he, Kasai and Toegu know
that he is still bound before the Lord to Toegu as  her
husband.
[Footnote: >218  (1 Cor. 7:10, 11).      >.n125  See
Appendix #6.]

But what about his vow to forsake all others, keeping
himself only to Toegu?  He finds himself under God's
command to keep his word>219 , and he also finds himself
under God's command to marry>220 .  Toegu refuses to be
wife to him so he could beat the predicted temptations
caused by her not obeying 1 Cor. 7:2-5 with him.  He's bound
by their vow but, as predicted, he is being taken advantage
of by the Enemy, burning and sometimes failing to control
himself.  I believe that Kure, who is not his own but
the purchased bond slave and member of the Bride of Christ,
is released by his Spiritual Lord and Husband from his
"forsaking all others" vow and released>221 to obey God's
Word>222 to let the loving comfort of marital intimacy
drown his burning.
[Footnote: >219  (Eccles. 5:1-5; Psa. 15).      >220  (1
Cor. 7:5,9,36).     >221  (Numbers 30).      >222  (1 Cor.
7:4,5,9.])

Any vow to sin is nullified for the believer according
to Numbers 30 and 1 Cor. 6:19,20.  You are not your own so
you have no authority to promise yourself to anything
except your Master's will. You would not allow your five
year old son to keep his foolish promise to rob a bank.  Your
boss, hopefully, would not let you use his luxury car to rob
the bank you promised to rob  using his car. It would be sin
on sin to keep sinful vows (Rom.6:1-5).  It would not be
sin to keep a vow that is in agreement with the Word
of God.   You have no authority to yield your self to
keeping a vow to sin even if your good intention is to
keep your word, especially when keeping your word
in and of itself would be sin, because what you vowed
to do is sin.

The best plan is to obey Jesus in Deut. 23:22; Eccles.
5:2,5; Matt. 5:33-37 and James 5:12A>#7 .  Instead of
vows/promises/covenants/ swearings/oaths, we should obey
Jesus in James 4:13-17 and Matt. 5:33-37, making solemn
declarations and affirmations of marital intentions,
aspirations and hopes instead of making presumptuously
arrogant and boastful marital vows about what we are going
to do and not do in the future, which belongs to God and not
to us.  Please see the appendices 6 & 7 for a sample of
such marital declarations and affirmations.
[Footnote: >7  See the file on oaths]

For Kure to reject, repudiate and forsake his marital
bond to Toegu in order to marry Kasai would make
him an adulterer and his marriage to Kasai,
adultery>223 .  Acknowledging his marital bond with
both Toegu and Kasai he becomes a polygynist, not an
adulterer, even if Toeguy can only be his
informal and unofficial contracted concubine because
of the laws of the land.
He keeps all righteous vows to both.
[Footnote: >223  (Mark 10:11,12; Luke 16:18).]

If the saved husband, Ndola, has divorced his saved
wife, Lusaka, and married another saved wife,
Serowe, his repentance for the adultery of both
divorcing his wife Lusaka and marrying Serowe --
should at least result in his seriously trying be to
reconciled to the Lusaka he left>224 .   Then he would
have to deal with the question of his
vows/covenants>225 he made with his new saved
wife, Serowe.   He would have  to decide whether or
not his covenants, if any, were binding and whether
or not that results in him being a polygynist with two
wives before the Lord (two wives, or a wife and a
concubine before his community).
[Footnote: >224 (Prov. 28:13; 1 Cor. 7:11,39).      >225
(Psa. 15:4; Prov. 20:25;Ezek. 17:15; Malachi 2:13-17;
Rom. 1:31).]

The situation could come to pass another way. If
Lusaka has gone through a divorce from her saved husband
Ndola, and she has married Ankora, her repentance should at
least result in her leaving Ankora to either be reconciled to
Ndola or live in celibate separation from him>226 .  If Lusaka
exercised her second best option and gets a divorce
separating herself from Ndola in celibacy>227, subjecting Ndola
to the temptations of 1 Cor. 7:5 so that his burnings and
failures to control himself>228 bring Ndola under God's
command to marry>126 and so he marries Serowe and is now
bound before God to two saved wives as long as they both
live>229.  If Lusaka divorced and separated herself and later
chooses to be reconciled to Ndola, to whom she is
bound by the Lord but who has already remarried
Serowe, then they have to decide if they resume their
marital relationship with Lusaka being an unofficially
contracted concubine in Western monogamous
societies, or as either a concubine or a second wife in
non-Western polygynous societies.  So indeed,
adultery, divorce and repentance can result in
polygyny and/or concubinage.
[Footnote: >226 (1 Cor.7:10,11,39).      >227 (1 Cor.
7:11).      >228  of 1 Cor. 7:9,36 (1 Th. 4:3,4,5).
>.n126 See Appendix 6.      >229  (1 Cor. 7:39; Rom.
7:1-3).]



The aim of my Web page is to submit for your consideration, controversial
and thought provoking files by a social activist and reformer on current
subjects and issues from an Anthropological and Judeo-Christian perspective.
If you are happy with our world's status quo then please read no further.

These cross cultural  files by a cultural anthropologist are an attempt to deal
with real and contemporary life-issues within a Judeo-Christian context, no
matter what the reader's marital status, culture, status, race or nationality
might be.   The only "culture" advocated and endorsed is the Judeo-Christian
culture, no love here for the status quo.  The ultimate authority accepted
here is the God-breathed Word of God as found in the Old and New
Testaments of the Holy Bible.  These are the subjects/titles available:

�       Abortion, Malicious Bias,  & Genocide (abortion.txt)
�       Angels, Demons & Spirits (AngelsDemonsSpirits.txt; YouAndAngels)
�       Biblical Insights on Sex, Morality &Pornography
(BiblcaLSexPornMorality)
�       Black Families' Crisis (PlightOfBlkFem-Fam.txt; BlackFamResrcs+.txt;
Black.Family.Resrcs)
�       Camelot, a Tale of Tragic Love ( A_Camelot_Dedication.txt)
�       Cherishing Your Women (CherishYourWomen1.txt)
�       Christian Divorce (Divorce_Remarriage.txt;
Divorce_&_Polygamy.html;
Christian_Divorce.txt; Christian_Divorce)
�       Christians and the Tithe ( ChristianTithe.txt )
�       Common Law &Informal Marriages  (ComnlawInfrmlMarriage.txt)
�       Crisis Resolution in the Unity of the Spirit (CrisisResolution.txt)
�       Disciples and Their Suffering (Why_Disciples_Suffer.txt;
       WhyBelieversSuffer.html)
�       Divorce & Remarriage (Divorce_Remarriage.txt;
Divorce_&_Polygamy.html;    Christian_Divorce.txt; Christian_Divorce)
�       Easter Insights (Easter_Insights.txt; Easter_Insights)
�       How and When to Marry (WhenHowMarry.txt)
�       How to Survive Divorce (HowSurvive_Divorce.txt)
�       Husband Wife Relations (HusbandWifeRelatnsMngny.txt;
Husband.Wife.Relatns)
�       Husbands Rule Wives? (HusbandRuleWife.txt)
�       Interracial/Interethnic Marriage (InterracialEthncMarrg.txt;
RacelessMarriage)
�       Is Jesus Jehovah God? (IsJesusJehovahGod.txt)
�       Keeping One's Word (KeepingOne'sWord.txt )
�       Keys to Loving Unity in Families and Fellowships
(KeysMLovingUnity.txt;
Keys4LovingUnity.txt)
�       The "Let" command of 1 Corinthians 7:9 (Let_Command.txt )
�       Man's Need Of Woman (Man'sNeedOfWoman.txt; MenNeedWomen)
�       The Marriage of the Godly Lasts Until Death Separates
(Divorce_&_Polygamy.html)
�       Marital Intimacy Manual for Contributors (MrtlIntmcyMn4Cntrs.txt)
�       Matchmaker Resources (MatchmakerResrcsInt)
�       Me In Christ, What Does It All Mean Really? (WhatIAmInChrist1.txt)
�       Me In This World, Why? (Why_Me_&_This_World.txt;
Why_Me_Now.txt;     Why_Me_In_World.html)
�       No Wedding Vows (NoWeddingVows.txt )
�       Oaths, Swearings, Promises (OathsSwrngsPrmss.txt; MarriageOaths)
�       Plight Of the Black Family (PlightOfBlkFem-Fam.txt)
�       Plight Of the Black Female (PlightOfBlkFem-Fam.txt)
�       Power Of Female Beauty (PowrOfFemBeauty.txt)
�       Prayers for Loved Ones (Prayers4LuvdOnes.txt)
�       Prisoner Abuse (PrisonerAbuse.txt)
�       Quotes On Polygyny (QuotesOnPolygyny.txt )
�       Racism, Nationalism and Bigotry (racsm.natnlsm.bigtry.txt)
�       Safe sex, Fact or Myth? (safe_sex.txt)
�       Seniors & Polygamy (senior_polygamy.txt)
�       Sex and Dependent Singles ( Youths_Singles_Sex.txt;
UnderageSexBurning.txt)
�       Song Of Solomon Part1 (SongOfSolomonPt1.txt)
�       Spiritual Warfare (Spiritual_Warfare.txt)
�       The Suffering of the Innocent, (Why_Disciples_Suffer.txt;
WhyBelieversSuffer.html)
�       The Tithe & Christians (Tithe&Christians.txt)
�       Truth vs Falsehoods (truth_vs_lies.txt)
�       Underage Sexual Burning and 1 Corinth. 10:13 ( Youths_Singles_Sex.txt;
UnderageSexBurning.txt)
�       Unequal Yokes, Interfaith Marriages (UnequalYokes.txt)
�       Unplanned Polygyny, a Trail of Tears (UnplannedPolygyny2.Txt)
�       Wedding Covenants (WeddingCovenants.txt)
�       Who is Tyler? (WhoLTyler.txt)
�       Why Only One Husband? (WhyOnly1Husbnd.txt)
�       Why Do "Good" People Suffer? (Why_Disciples_Suffer.txt;
WhyBelieversSuffer.html)
�       Why Would a Wife Share Her Husband? (WhyWifeShreHsbnd.txt)
�       Polygamy Resources ( PolyResources2.txt)
�       Polygamy, Divorce & Remarriage (Divorce_&_Polygamy.html;
Divorce_and_PolygamyPt1.html;  Divorce_and_PolygamyPt2.html;
    Divorce+PolygamyPt1.txt; Divorce+PolygamyPt2.txt)
�       Polygamy and Christians Today (ChristianPolyToday.txt )
�       Polygamy and Concubines in the Bible (PolygamyConcubines.txt)
�       Polygamy and the Law (Legal_Polygamy.txt)
�       Polygamy and the Reformation (reformationpoly.txt)
�       Polygamy in a Nutshell (minipoly.txt, Polygyny_core.txt;
polyamory_unknown.html )
�       Polygamy, Traditional Criticisms (objections2poly.txt)
�       Polygamy's Transition from Old Testament to New Testament times
(Ot2NtDivRemPoly.txt)
�       Polygamy, Morality and Pornography (PolyMoralityPorn76.txt;
polyandry)
�       Polygamy's/Polygyny's  Scriptures and Contexts (PolyScripsQuotes.txt;
PolygynyInScrips; Biblical_polygamy.html)
�       Polygynous Families: Keys to Loving Unity in Polygyny (
KeysLovingUnity;
Keys2LovingUnity.html)

These files are available at:
Tyler,  at [email protected]   or [email protected]
or [email protected]
http://www.etext.org/Religious.Texts/Polyamory
http://www.etext.org/Religious.texts/Polyamory
ftp: www.etext.org; User: Anonymous; Password: Your email add
http://www.mindspring.com/users/~oldservant
http://www.mindspring.com/~oldservant/
ftp.mindspring.com; User: Anonymous; Password: your email address;
Directory: /users/oldservant
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Troy/6916/


PLEASE DON'T BUY PRODUCTS MADE IN CHINA BECAUSE  (1) THEY
SYSTEMATICALLY TORTURE AND KILL  BORN-AGAIN BELIEVERS IN
CHRIST FOR THEIR FAITH, (2) THEY SYSTEMATICALLY EXECUTE
PRISONERS FOR NON CAPTIAL CRIMES TO HARVEST THEIR BODY
ORGANS FOR SALE ABROAD,  (3) THEY FORCE MOTHERS/FAMILIES TO
ABORT ALL OF THEIR UNBORN INFANTS EXCEPT FOR ONE PER FAMILY,
AND FEMALE UNBORN INFANTS ARE THE MOST COMMON VICTIMS.

PLEASE DON'T BUY PRODUCTS MADE IN SUDAN, ESPECIALLY BY NOT
BUYING SOFT DRINKS AND JUICE DRINKS THAT CONTAIN ESTER GUM
ROSIN OR ESTER OF WOOD ROSIN, BECAUSE THEY ARE
SYSTEMATICALLY TORTURING, RAPING, ENSLAVING AND KILLING
SUDANESE BELIEVERS IN CHRIST SOLELY BECAUSE OF THEIR FAITH. Want to help?
go to www.fitw.com.

PLEASE DON'T BUY DISNEY AND DISNEYLAND PRODUCTS AND
FACILITIES BECAUSE OF THE ANTICHRISTIAN AND ANTIGOD
PRODUCTS, SHOWS AND MOVIES THEY ARE PUTTING OUT NOW.

BIBLIOGRAPHY

>1. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene
Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. IV; edited by Philip Schaff (D.d., LL.D.);
W.B. Eerdmans
Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>2. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene
Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. V; edited by Philip Schaff (D.d., LL.D.); ;
W.B. Eerdmans
Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956; p. 267
>3. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene
Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. VIII; edited by Philip Schaff (D.d., LL.D.)
and Henry Wace (D.D.) ;  W.B.   Eerdmans
Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>4. A Select Library of the Nicene and Post-Nicene
Fathers of The Christian
Church, Vol. XIV; edited by Philip Schaff (D.D., LL.D.)
and Henry Wace (D.D.) ; W.B.    Eerdmans
Publishing Co., Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>5. Amplified Bible, The; 1965, Zondervan Publishing
House
>6. ANALYTICAL GREEK LEXICON, THE: Harper &
Brothers, New York
>7. Arndt & Gingrich: A GREEK-ENGLISH LEXICON OF
THE NEW TESTAMENT and Other Early Christian
Literature  ; By W.F.Arndt & F. W. Gingrich; The Univ.
of Chicago Press, Chicago, Ill.; Cambridge at the Univ.
Press.; 1957
>8. ASV: The Holy Bible, American Standard Version
1901 & 1929; Thomas
Nelson & Sons, New York
>9. Gold Cord, by Amy Carmichael, Christian Literature
Crusade, Fort Worthington, Penna.; London's Society
for the Promotion of Christian Knowledge, Holy Trinity
Church, Marylebone Rd., N.W. (N.Y. The Macmillan
Company).
>10.  CUSTOMS AND CULTURES, Anthropology for
Christian Missions, by Eugene A. Nida1954, Harper &
Brothers, New York
>11. Darby's 1890 translation: Most of the scriptures
quoted in this work, if
not otherwise indicated, are from the a modernized
version of J. N. Darby's
translation, the  OnLine Bible computer program of
"Online Bible f ", Ken
Hammil  1-908-741-4298; [E-Mail: [email protected]].
>12. DIVORCE, John Murray, Presbyterian and
Reformed Publishing Co.  \
>13. G. Duty's book on divorce and remarriage ,
Downers Grove, Ill.
>14. HASTING'S DICTIONARY OF THE BIBLE; 1989,
Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., Peabody, Mass;, Editor
James Hastings, DD.,
>15. I LOVED A GIRL;  Walter Trobisch,  Inter-Varsity
Press, Downers Grove, Ill.
>16. INTERNATIONAL BIBLE COMMENTARY, THE;
Editor, F.F.Bruce; 1979; Zondervan      Publishing
House, Grand Rapids Michigan.
>17.    Jay Adam's� book on divorce and remarriage
>18. JEWISH: The Holy Scriptures according to the
Masoretic Text,  1955, The Jewish       Publication
Society.
>19. KINSHIP & MARRIAGE, Robin Fox, 1967,  Penguin
Books, Inc., USA & England
>20. LAMSA: The Holy Bible from Ancient Eastern
Manuscripts, 1940, Holman Co., by G.            Lamsa.
>21. MARRIAGE EAST AND WEST; David & Vera Mace,
1960, Dolphin Books, Double Day & Co., Inc. Garden
City, NY
>22.MARRYING AGAIN; David Hocking, 1977, Fleming
H. Revell Co.
>23. MKJV: MODERN KING JAMES VERSION, 1993, by
Jay P. Green Sr., in Online Bible 2.5.1; the  OnLine
Bible computer program of  "Online Bible f ", Ken
Hammil  1-      908-741-4298; [E-Mail:
[email protected]].
>24. MY WIFE MADE ME A POLYGAMIST; Walter
Trobisch, 1971, Inter-Varsity Press,
>25. NASB: Holy Bible New American Standard;
Broadman & Holman Publishers, Nashville Tenn.; The
Lockman Foundation, 1977
>26. NEB: NEW ENGLISH BIBLE, 1970;
Oxford/Cambridge University Press
>27.  NEW BIBLE DICTIONARY, THE; Editor J.D.Douglas
Ph.D; 1962; W. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., Grand
Rapids, Mich.
>28.  NEW TESTAMENT GREEK FOR BEGINNERS, By, J.
Gresham Machen, D.D, Litt. D.,1959
>29. NIV:  "Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW
INTERNATIONAL VERSION. Copyright @ 1973, 1978,
1984 International Bible Society." Used as required by
Zondervan Bible Publishers.
>30. NKJV:  New King James Version, 1984, Thomas
Nelson, Inc.
>31. OnLine Bible computer program of  "Online Bible f
", Ken Hammil  1-908-741-4298; [E-Mail:
[email protected]].
>32.  PLEASE HELP ME! PLEASE LOVE ME!; Walter
Trobisch,  Inter-Varsity Press,
>33. St. Augustin: On The Trinity; translated by Arthur
West Haddan, B.D.; W.B. Eerdmans Publishing Co.,
Grand Rapids Mich; 1956
>34. Strong�s Lexicon, Open Bible "Online Bible f", Ken
Hammil  1-908-741-
4298.  Also Baker Book House, Grand Rapids, Mich.
>35. Thayer: Greek English Lexicon of the New
Testament; Joseph Henry Thayer, D.D.; American Book
Co., New York, 1889
>36.  The Septuagint of the Old Testament and
Apocrypha With an English
Translation; Zondervan Publishing House, Grand
Rapids, Michigan; 1972;
Samuel Bagster & Sons, Ltd. London
>37. WOMEN'S LIVES IN MEDIEVAL EUROPE  - A
SOURCEBOOK;  Edited by Emile Amt;       Routledge,
Chapman, Hall; NY, NY; 1993
>38. Wuest's THE NEW TESTAMENT, An Expanded
Translation, Kenneth S. Wuest, 1961
>39. YLT; Young's Literal Translation, 1898: OnLine
Bible computer program of  "Online Bible f ", Ken
Hammil  1-908-741-4298; [E-Mail: [email protected]].

        I am not trying to meddle or cause trouble.  I
just want to know if there are any mistakes in the
ideas above in terms of scripture alone, not in  terms
of the  condemned traditions and doctrines of people
(Mark 7).I really want to know what the Bible says
about the subjects discussed above.  I want to live by
every Word of God, not by the commandments and
traditions of man (Mat. 15, Mark 7 and Colos 2).

PLEASE ADVISE ME OF ANY AND ALL ERRORS (TYPOS,
DOCTRINAL, ETC.) THAT YOU FIND.  PLEASE GIVE ME
CLEAR AND EXPLICIT SCRIPTURES  DEALING WITH
THE  ERROR WHEN YOU WRITE.  I WANT THE WORD,
NOT OPINIONS AND PARADIGMS.

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