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        (U)                                                        (U)

                                 MAIL FRAUD

                               by  L.E. Pirate

                     >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<<
                       -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-
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    Mail Fraud.  The best thing since sugar free Jello (right Psyche?).
  It is probably the most illegal thing you can get involved in, even worse
  than (gulp) credit card scams.  If you watch the news much, they nab alot
  of mafia dudes and drug guys for mail fraud, so I really do not recomend
  this as something you should do; I don't do it, so you know how much
  trouble you can get in.

    In order to do this, you have to card an advertisement in a magazine for
  a cruise, like a 6-10 day cruise in the Bahamas and 2 days in DisneyWorld.
  Make the ad colorful, something that would "jump out" at the person.  I
  suggest you advertise in National Inquirer, Weekly World News, or something
  like that (the bullshit papers, "I had a UFO Monkey for a baby, etc.") Those
  kinds of papers will carry any ads.  Either get a voice mail system, or a
  voice line (which is so stupid since the feds will catch you faster than
  you can say "jail sentence").  Make the voice mail system message say
  something like this.

  (PLAY SOME MUSIC, NOT ROCK OR ANYTHING, LIKE MUZAK SHIT)
  "Hello there, you have reached Star*Dust International Cruise Line
   Reservations.  At the moment, no one is currently available in the
   office.  Please leave your name, and voice number where you can be reached,
   daytime or home numbers are accepted.  Please leave it at the sound of the
   tone.  Thank you, and have a nice day!" BEEP.

      Next.  Call them and say, "Star*Dust International calling" or whatever.
   Ask them if they would like a FREE cruise line listing.  Write down their
   address.  Before anything, you should call a real place and ask for some
   cruise line booklets delivered to YOUR house (YOUR address).  Make an
   official looking cruise line sheet to go inside the booklet, rip the ones
   out that are in there.  Ask shit like drivers license number, 2 forms of
   identification, visa/mc/amex card (you know), references, etc.  Tell them
   to mail it to a P.O. box (get one registered under an alias, not your
   handle, dipshit, but like, 'TOM DICKFACE' or something.  If they need I.D.
   read the file coming out soon, 'PAPER FRAUD' or 'CHANGING YOUR I.D.', it
   will appear in the first issue of Beyond TAP Magazine in March, 1988).
   Then tell them their tickets will be mailed to them.  You might want to
   call a place and ACTUALLY get them the tickets, or just forget about it.
   If you send the tickets, they will totally forget about it.  If not, I'm
   sure a full investigation will kick in.  Best to do it.

       Please be careful...I would not actually try this.  I have not tried
   it, and I do not plan on trying it.  I take no responsibility for what
   you do (right there, I said it).  If you try anything in ANY of my files,
   you are totally 100 percent liable for everything you do.  I did not make
   you do anything, and I assume you are not a 'tard and can understand that
   mail fraud is one of the grandmaster biggies of all time.  So stay cool.

       I'd like to thank ME, Swamp Rat, The Blade, Professor Falken, Ice Pic,
   Brain Tumor, The Traxster, Dr. Rom, Grass Lunatic, Bronze Rider, The Disk
   Jockey, The Perplexer, Dial Tone, Scourge, Fry Guy, The Snowman, and
   anyone that I forgot.  Big FUCK YOU's go out to Dead Lord who thinks Blade
   won't get his book sold.  Thanks again.

       Support these K00L Systems...

 Dragonfire Private.....Pr]OPEN SESAME Nu]DEAD..BBS for BTAP..609/424-2606
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(c)1987  cDc communications  by L.E. Pirate                          0/0/87-44
All Rights Worth Shit

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