============ THIS IS THE JARGON FILE, VERSION 2.9.6, 16 AUG 1991 ============

This document (the Jargon File) is in the public domain, to be freely
used, shared, and modified.  There are (by intention) no legal
restraints on what you can do with it, but there are traditions about
its proper use to which many hackers are quite strongly attached.
Please extend the courtesy of proper citation when you quote the File,
ideally with a version number, as it will change and grow over time.
(Examples of appropropriate citation form: "Jargon File 2.9.4" or
"The on-line hacker Jargon File, version 2.9.4, July 1991".)

The Jargon File is a common heritage of the hacker culture.
Over the years a number of individuals have volunteered considerable
time to maintaining the File and been recognized by the net at large
as editors of it.  Editorial responsibilities include: to collate
contributions and suggestions from others; to seek out corroborating
information; to cross-reference related entries; to keep the file in a
consistent format; and to announce and distribute updated versions
periodically.  Current volunteer editors include:

       Eric Raymond    [email protected]          (215)-296-5718

Although there is no requirement that you do so, it is considered good
form to check with an editor before quoting the File in a published work
or commercial product.  We may have additional information that would be
helpful to you and can assist you in framing your quote to reflect
not only the letter of the File but its spirit as well.

All contributions and suggestions about this file sent to a volunteer
editor are gratefully received and will be regarded, unless otherwise
labelled, as freely given donations for possible use as part of this
public-domain file.

From time to time a snapshot of this file has been polished, edited,
and formatted for commercial publication with the cooperation of the
volunteer editors and the hacker community at large.  If you wish to
have a bound paper copy of this file, you may find it convenient to
purchase one of these.  They often contain additional material not
found in on-line versions.  The two `authorized' editions so far are
described in the Revision History section; there may be more in the
future.

Introduction
************

About This Book
===============

This document is a collection of slang terms used by various subcultures
of computer hackers.  Though some technical material is included for
background and flavor, it is not a technical dictionary; what we
describe here is the language hackers use among themselves for fun,
social communication, and technical debate.

The `hacker culture' is actually a loosely networked collection of
subcultures that is nevertheless conscious of some important shared
experiences, shared roots, and shared values.  It has its own myths,
heroes, villains, folk epics, in-jokes, taboos, and dreams.  Because
hackers as a group are particularly creative people who define
themselves partly by rejection of `normal' values and working habits, it
has unusually rich and conscious traditions for an intentional culture
less than 35 years old.

As usual with slang, the special vocabulary of hackers helps hold their
culture together --- it helps hackers recognize each other's places in
the community and expresses shared values and experiences.  Also as
usual, *not* knowing the slang (or using it inappropriately) defines one
as an outsider, a mundane, or (worst of all in hackish vocabulary)
possibly even a {suit}.  All human cultures use slang in this threefold
way --- as a tool of communication, and of inclusion, and of exclusion.

Among hackers, though, slang has a subtler aspect, paralleled perhaps in
the slang of jazz musicians and some kinds of fine artists but hard to
detect in most technical or scientific cultures; parts of it are code
for shared states of *consciousness*.  There is a whole range of altered
states and problem-solving mental stances basic to high-level hacking
which don't fit into conventional linguistic reality any better than a
Coltrane solo or one of Maurits Escher's `trompe l'oeil' compositions
(Escher is a favorite of hackers), and hacker slang encodes these
subtleties in many unobvious ways.  As a simple example, take the
distinction between a {kluge} and an {elegant} solution, and the
differing connotations attached to each.  The distinction is not only of
engineering significance; it reaches right back into the nature of the
generative processes in program design and asserts something important
about two different kinds of relationship between the hacker and the
hack.  Hacker slang is unusually rich in implications of this kind, of
overtones and undertones that illuminate the hackish psyche.

But there is more.  Hackers, as a rule, love wordplay and are very
conscious and inventive in their use of language.  These traits seem to
be common in young children, but the conformity-enforcing machine we are
pleased to call an educational system bludgeons them out of most of us
before adolescence.  Thus, linguistic invention in most subcultures of
the modern West is a halting and largely unconscious process.  Hackers,
by contrast, regard slang formation and use as a game to be played for
conscious pleasure.  Their inventions thus display an almost unique
combination of the neotenous enjoyment of language-play with the
discrimination of educated and powerful intelligence.  Further, the
electronic media which knit them together are fluid, `hot' connections,
well adapted to both the dissemination of new slang and the ruthless
culling of weak and superannuated specimens.  The results of this
process give us perhaps a uniquely intense and accelerated view of
linguistic evolution in action.

The intensity and consciousness of hackish invention make a compilation
of hacker slang a particularly effective window into the surrounding
culture --- and, in fact, this one is the latest version of an evolving
compilation called the `Jargon File', maintained by hackers themselves
for over 15 years.  This one (like its ancestors) is primarily a
lexicon, but also includes `topic entries' which collect background or
sidelight information on hacker culture that would be awkward to try to
subsume under individual entries.

Though the format is that of a reference volume, it is intended that the
material be enjoyable to browse.  Even a complete outsider should find
at least a chuckle on nearly every page, and much that is amusingly
thought-provoking.  But it is also true that hackers use humorous
wordplay to make strong, sometimes combative statements about what they
feel.  Some of these entries reflect the views of opposing sides in
disputes that have been genuinely passionate; this is deliberate.  We
have not tried to moderate or pretty up these disputes; rather we have
attempted to ensure that *everyone's* sacred cows get gored,
impartially.  Compromise is not particularly a hackish virtue, but the
honest presentation of divergent viewpoints is.

The reader with minimal computer background who finds some references
incomprehensibly technical can safely ignore them.  We have not felt it
either necessary or desirable to eliminate all such; they, too,
contribute flavor, and one of this document's major intended audiences
--- fledgling hackers already partway inside the culture --- will
benefit from them.

A selection of longer items of hacker folklore and humor is included in
appendix A.  The `outside' reader's attention is particularly directed
to appendix B, "A Portrait of J. Random Hacker".  Appendix C is a
bibliography of non-technical works which have either influenced or
described the hacker culture.

Because hackerdom is an intentional culture (one each individual must
choose by action to join), one should not be surprised that the line
between description and influence can become more than a little blurred.
Earlier versions of the Jargon File have played a central role in
spreading hacker language and the culture that goes with it to
successively larger populations, and we hope and expect that this one
will do likewise.

Of Slang, Jargon, and Techspeak
===============================

Linguists usually refer to informal language as `slang' and reserve the
term `jargon' for the technical vocabularies of various occupations.
However, the ancestor of this collection was called the `Jargon File',
and hackish slang is traditionally `the jargon'.  When talking about the
jargon there is therefore no convenient way to distinguish what a
*linguist* would call hackers' jargon --- the formal vocabulary they
learn from textbooks, technical papers, and manuals.

To make a confused situation worse, the line between hackish slang and
the vocabulary of technical programming and computer science is fuzzy,
and shifts over time.  Further, this vocabulary is shared with a wider
technical culture of programmers, many of whom are not hackers and do
not speak or recognize hackish slang.

Accordingly, this lexicon will try to be as precise as the facts of
usage permit about the distinctions among three categories:

  * `slang': informal language from mainstream English or non-technical
    subcultures (bikers, rock fans, surfers, etc.)
  * `jargon': without qualifier, denotes informal `slangy' language
    peculiar to hackers --- the subject of this lexicon
  * `techspeak': the formal technical vocabulary of programming,
    computer science, electronics, and other fields connected to hacking

This terminology will be consistently used throughout the remainder of
this lexicon.

The jargon/techspeak distinction is the delicate one.  A lot of
techspeak originated as jargon, and there is a steady continuing uptake
of jargon into techspeak.  On the other hand, a lot of jargon arises
from overgeneralization of techspeak terms (there is more about this in
the "Jargon Construction" section below).

In general, we have considered techspeak any term that communicates
primarily by a denotation well established in textbooks, technical
dictionaries, or standards documents.

A few obviously techspeak terms (names of operating systems, languages,
or documents) are listed when they are tied to hacker folklore that
isn't covered in formal sources, or sometimes to convey critical
historical background necessary to understand other entries to which
they are cross-referenced.  Some other techspeak senses of jargon words
are listed in order to make the jargon senses clear; where the text does
not specify that a straight technical sense is under discussion, these
are marked with `[techspeak]' as an etymology.  Some entries have a
primary sense marked this way, with subsequent jargon meanings explained
in terms of it.

We have also tried to indicate (where known) the apparent origins of
terms.  The results are probably the least reliable information in the
lexicon, for several reasons.  For one thing, it is well known that many
hackish usages have been independently reinvented multiple times, even
among the more obscure and intricate neologisms.  It often seems that
the generative processes underlying hackish jargon formation have an
internal logic so powerful as to create substantial parallelism across
separate cultures and even in different languages!  For another, the
networks tend to propagate innovations so quickly that `first use' is
often impossible to pin down.  And, finally, compendia like this one
alter what they observe by implicitly stamping cultural approval on
terms and widening their use.

Revision History
================

The original Jargon File was a collection of hacker jargon from
technical cultures including the MIT AI Lab, the Stanford AI lab (SAIL),
and others of the old ARPANET AI/LISP/PDP-10 communities including Bolt,
Beranek and Newman (BBN), Carnegie-Mellon University (CMU), and
Worcester Polytechnic Institute (WPI).

The Jargon File (hereafter referred to as `jargon-1' or `the File') was
begun by Raphael Finkel at Stanford in 1975.  From this time until the
plug was finally pulled on the SAIL computer in 1991, the File was named
AIWORD.RF[UP,DOC] there.  Some terms in it date back considerably
earlier ({frob} and some senses of {moby}, for instance, go back to the
Tech Model Railroad Club at MIT and are believed to date at least back
to the early 1960s).  The revisions of jargon-1 were all unnumbered and
may be collectively considered `Version 1'.

In 1976, Mark Crispin, having seen an announcement about the File on the
SAIL computer, {FTP}ed a copy of the File to MIT.  He noticed that it
was hardly restricted to `AI words' and so stored the file on his
directory as AI:MRC;SAIL JARGON.

The file was quickly renamed JARGON > (the `>' means numbered with a
version number) as a flurry of enhancements were made by Mark Crispin
and Guy L. Steele Jr.  Unfortunately, amidst all this activity, nobody
thought of correcting the term `jargon' to `slang' until the compendium
had already become widely known as the Jargon File.

Raphael Finkel dropped out of active participation shortly thereafter
and Don Woods became the SAIL contact for the File (which was
subsequently kept in duplicate at SAIL and MIT, with periodic
resynchronizations).

The File expanded by fits and starts until about 1983; Richard Stallman
was prominent among the contributors, adding many MIT and ITS-related
coinages.

A late version of jargon-1, expanded with commentary for the mass
market, was edited by Guy Steele into a book published in 1983 as `The
Hacker's Dictionary' (Harper & Row CN 1082, ISBN 0-06-091082-8).  The
other jargon-1 editors (Raphael Finkel, Don Woods, and Mark Crispin)
contributed to the revision, as did Richard M. Stallman and Geoff
Goodfellow.  This book (now out of print) is hereafter referred to as
`Steele-1983' and those six as the Steele-1983 coauthors.

Shortly after the publication of Steele-1983, the File effectively
stopped growing and changing.  Originally, this was due to a desire to
freeze the file temporarily to facilitate the production of Steele-1983,
but external conditions caused the `temporary' freeze to become
permanent.

The AI Lab culture had been hit hard in the late 1970s by funding cuts
and the resulting administrative decision to use vendor-supported
hardware and software instead of homebrew whenever possible.  At MIT,
most AI work had turned to dedicated LISP Machines.  At the same time,
the commercialization of AI technology lured some of the AI Lab's best
and brightest away to startups along the Route 128 strip in
Massachusetts and out West in Silicon Valley.  The startups built LISP
machines for MIT; the central MIT-AI computer became a {TWENEX} system
rather than a host for the AI hackers' beloved {ITS}.

The Stanford AI Lab had effectively ceased to exist by 1980, although
the SAIL computer continued as a Computer Science Department resource
until 1991.  Stanford became a major {TWENEX} site, at one point
operating more than a dozen TOPS-20 systems; but by the mid-1980s most
of the interesting software work was being done on the emerging BSD UNIX
standard.

In April 1983, the PDP-10-centered cultures that had nourished the File
were dealt a death-blow by the cancellation of the Jupiter project at
Digital Equipment Corporation.  The File's compilers, already dispersed,
moved on to other things.  Steele-1983 was partly a monument to what its
authors thought was a dying tradition; no one involved realized at the
time just how wide its influence was to be.

By the mid-1980s the File's content was dated, but the legend that had
grown up around it never quite died out.  The book, and softcopies
obtained off the ARPANET, circulated even in cultures far removed from
MIT and Stanford; the content exerted a strong and continuing influence
on hackish language and humor.  Even as the advent of the microcomputer
and other trends fueled a tremendous expansion of hackerdom, the File
(and related materials such as the AI Koans in Appendix A) came to be
seen as a sort of sacred epic, a hacker-culture Matter of Britain
chronicling the heroic exploits of the Knights of the Lab.  The pace of
change in hackerdom at large accelerated tremendously --- but the Jargon
File, having passed from living document to icon, remained essentially
untouched for seven years.

This revision contains nearly the entire text of a late version of
jargon-1 (a few obsolete PDP-10-related entries were dropped after
careful consultation with the editors of Steele-1983).  It merges in
about 80% of the Steele-1983 text, omitting some framing material and a
very few entries introduced in Steele-1983 that are now also obsolete.

This new version casts a wider net than the old Jargon File; its aim is
to cover not just AI or PDP-10 hacker culture but all the technical
computing cultures wherein the true hacker-nature is manifested.  More
than half of the entries now derive from {USENET} and represent jargon
now current in the C and UNIX communities, but special efforts have been
made to collect jargon from other cultures including IBM PC programmers,
Amiga fans, Mac enthusiasts, and even the IBM mainframe world.

Eric S. Raymond ([email protected]) maintains the new File with
assistance from Guy L. Steele Jr. ([email protected]); these are the persons
primarily reflected in the File's editorial `we', though we take
pleasure in acknowledging the special contribution of the other
coauthors of Steele-1983.  Please email all additions, corrections, and
correspondence relating to the Jargon File to [email protected]
(UUCP-only sites without connections to an autorouting smart site can
use ...!uunet!snark!jargon).

(Warning: other email addresses appear in this file *but are not
guaranteed to be correct* later than the revision date on the first
line.  *Don't* email us if an attempt to reach your idol bounces --- we
have no magic way of checking addresses or looking up people.)

Some snapshot of this on-line version will become the main text of a
`New Hacker's Dictionary', to be published by MIT Press possibly as
early as Summer 1991.  The maintainers are committed to updating the
on-line version of the Jargon File through and beyond paper publication,
and will continue to make it available to archives and public-access
sites as a trust of the hacker community.

Here is a chronology of the recent on-line revisions:

Version 2.1.1, Jun 12 1990: the Jargon File comes alive again after a
seven-year hiatus.  Reorganization and massive additions were by Eric S.
Raymond, approved by Guy Steele.  Many items of UNIX, C, USENET, and
microcomputer-based jargon were added at that time (as well as The
Untimely Demise of Mabel The Monkey).  Some obsolete usages (mostly
PDP-10 derived) were moved to Appendix B.

Version 2.1.5, Nov 28 1990: changes and additions by ESR in response to
numerous USENET submissions and comment from the First Edition
co-authors.  The bibliography (Appendix C) was also appended.  This
version had 6028 lines, 46946 words, 307510 characters, and 866 entries

Version 2.2.1, Dec 15 1990: most of the contents of the 1983 paper
edition edited by Guy Steele was merged in.  Many more USENET
submissions added, including the International Style and the material on
Commonwealth Hackish.  This version had 9394 lines, 75954 words, 490501
characters, and 1046 entries.

Version 2.3.1, Jan 03 1991: the great format change --- case is no
longer smashed in lexicon keys and cross-references.  A very few entries
from jargon-1 which were basically straight techspeak were deleted; this
enabled the rest of Appendix B to be merged back into main text and the
appendix replaced with the Portrait of J. Random Hacker.  More USENET
submissions were added.  This version had 10728 lines, 85070 words,
558261 characters, and 1138 entries.

Version 2.4.1, Jan 14 1991: the Story of Mel and many more USENET
submissions merged in.  More material on hackish writing habits added.
Numerous typo fixes.  This version had 12362 lines, 97819 words, 642899
characters, and 1239 entries.

Version 2.5.1, Jan 29 1991: many new entries merged in.  Discussion of
inclusion styles added.  This version had 14145 lines, 111904 words,
734285 characters, and 1425 entries.

Version 2.6.1, Feb 13 1991: second great format change; no more <>
around headwords or references.  Merged in results of serious
copy-editing passes by Guy Steele, Mark Brader.  Still more entries
added.  This version had 15011 lines, 118277 words, 774942 characters,
and 1485 entries.

Version 2.7.1, Mar 01 1991: new section on slang/jargon/techspeak added.
Results of Guy's second edit pass merged in.  This version had 16087
lines, 126885 words, 831872 characters, and 1533 entries.

Version 2.8.1, Mar 22 1991: material from the TMRC Dictionary and MRC's
editing pass merged in.  This version had 17154 lines, 135647 words,
888333 characters, and 1602 entries.

Version 2.9.1, Jun 05 1991: last network release before book.  This
version had 18610 lines, 146262 words, 957178 characters, and 1670
entries.

Version 2.9.2, Jun 21 1991: corresponds to reproduction copy for book.
This version had 18911 lines, 1478291 words, 973269 characters, and 1697
entries.

Version numbering: Version numbers should be read as
major.minor.revision.  Major version 1 is reserved for the `old' (ITS)
Jargon File, jargon-1.  Major version 2 encompasses revisions by ESR
(Eric S. Raymond) with assistance from GLS (Guy L.  Steele, Jr.).
Someday, the next maintainer will take over and spawn `version 3'.
Usually later versions will either completely supersede or incorporate
earlier versions, so there is generally no point in keeping old versions
around.

Our thanks to the coauthors of Steele-1983 for oversight and assistance,
and to the hundreds of USENETters (too many to name here) who
contributed entries and encouragement.  More thanks go to several of the
old-timers on the USENET group alt.folklore.computers, who contributed
much useful commentary and many corrections and valuable historical
perspective: Joseph M. Newcomer <[email protected]>, Bernie Cosell
<[email protected]>, Earl Boebert <[email protected]>, and Joe Morris
<[email protected]>.

We were fortunate enough to have the aid of some accomplished linguists.
David Stampe <[email protected]> and Charles Hoequist
<[email protected]> contributed valuable criticism; Joe Keane
<[email protected]> helped us improve the pronunciation guides.

A few bits of this text quote previous works.  We are indebted to Brian
A. LaMacchia <[email protected]> for obtaining permission for us to
use material from the `TMRC Dictionary'; also, Don Libes contributed
some appropriate material from his excellent book `Life With UNIX'.

We thank Per Lindberg <[email protected]>, author of the remarkable
Swedish-language 'zine `Hackerbladet', for bringing `FOO!'  comics to
our attention and smuggling one of the IBM hacker underground's own baby
jargon files out to us.  Thanks also to Maarten Litmaath for generously
allowing the inclusion of the ASCII pronunciation guide he formerly
maintained. Finally, Mark Brader <[email protected]> and George V.  Reilly
<[email protected]> submitted many thoughtful comments and did yeoman
service in catching typos and minor usage bobbles, and Eric Tiedemann
<[email protected]> contributed sage advice on rhetoric, amphigory, and
philosophunculism.

How Jargon Works
****************

Jargon Construction
===================

There are some standard methods of jargonification that became
established quite early (i.e., before 1970), spreading from such sources
as the Tech Model Railroad Club, the PDP-1 SPACEWAR hackers, and John
McCarthy's original crew of LISPers.  These include the following:


Verb doubling ------------- A standard construction in English is to
double a verb and use it as an exclamation, such as "Bang, bang!" or
"Quack, quack!".  Most of these are names for noises.  Hackers also
double verbs as a concise, sometimes sarcastic comment on what the
implied subject does.  Also, a doubled verb is often used to terminate a
conversation, in the process remarking on the current state of affairs
or what the speaker intends to do next.  Typical examples involve {win},
{lose}, {hack}, {flame}, {barf}, {chomp}:

    "The disk heads just crashed."  "Lose, lose."
    "Mostly he talked about his latest crock.  Flame, flame."
    "Boy, what a bagbiter!  Chomp, chomp!"

Some verb-doubled constructions have special meanings not immediately
obvious from the verb.  These have their own listings in the lexicon.


Soundalike slang ---------------- Hackers will often make rhymes or puns
in order to convert an ordinary word or phrase into something more
interesting.  It is considered particularly {flavorful} if the phrase is
bent so as to include some other jargon word; thus the computer hobbyist
magazine `Dr. Dobb's Journal' is almost always referred to among hackers
as `Dr. Frob's Journal' or simply `Dr. Frob's'.  Terms of this kind that
have been in fairly wide use include names for newspapers:

    Boston Herald => Horrid (or Harried)
    Boston Globe => Boston Glob
    Houston (or San Francisco) Chronicle
           => the Crocknicle (or the Comical)
    New York Times => New York Slime

However, terms like these are often made up on the spur of the moment.
Standard examples include:

    Data General => Dirty Genitals
    IBM 360 => IBM Three-Sickly
    Government Property --- Do Not Duplicate (on keys)
           => Government Duplicity --- Do Not Propagate
    for historical reasons => for hysterical raisins
    Margaret Jacks Hall (the CS building at Stanford)
           => Marginal Hacks Hall

This is not really similar to the Cockney rhyming slang it has been
compared to in the past, because Cockney substitutions are opaque
whereas hacker punning jargon is intentionally transparent.


The `-P' convention ------------------- Turning a word into a question
by appending the syllable `P'; from the LISP convention of appending the
letter `P' to denote a predicate (a boolean-valued function).  The
question should expect a yes/no answer, though it needn't.  (See {T} and
{NIL}.)

    At dinnertime:
          Q: "Foodp?"
          A: "Yeah, I'm pretty hungry." or "T!"

    At any time:
          Q: "State-of-the-world-P?"
          A: (Straight) "I'm about to go home."
          A: (Humorous) "Yes, the world has a state."

    On the phone to Florida:
          Q: "State-p Florida?"
          A: "Been reading JARGON.TXT again, eh?"

[One of the best of these is a {Gosperism}.  Once, when we were at a
Chinese restaurant, Bill Gosper wanted to know whether someone would
like to share with him a two-person-sized bowl of soup.  His inquiry
was: "Split-p soup?" --- GLS]


Overgeneralization ------------------ A very conspicuous feature of
jargon is the frequency with which techspeak items such as names of
program tools, command language primitives, and even assembler opcodes
are applied to contexts outside of computing wherever hackers find
amusing analogies to them.  Thus (to cite one of the best-known
examples) UNIX hackers often {grep} for things rather than searching for
them.  Many of the lexicon entries are generalizations of exactly this
kind.

Hackers enjoy overgeneralization on the grammatical level as well.  Many
hackers love to take various words and add the wrong endings to them to
make nouns and verbs, often by extending a standard rule to nonuniform
cases (or vice versa).  For example, because

    porous => porosity
    generous => generosity

hackers happily generalize:

    mysterious => mysteriosity
    ferrous => ferrosity
    obvious => obviosity
    dubious => dubiosity

Also, note that all nouns can be verbed.  E.g.: "All nouns can be
verbed", "I'll mouse it up", "Hang on while I clipboard it over", "I'm
grepping the files".  English as a whole is already heading in this
direction (towards pure-positional grammar like Chinese); hackers are
simply a bit ahead of the curve.

However, note that hackers avoid the unimaginative verb-making
techniques characteristic of marketroids, bean-counters, and the
Pentagon; a hacker would never, for example, `productize', `prioritize',
or `securitize' things.  Hackers have a strong aversion to bureaucratic
bafflegab and regard those who use it with contempt.

Similarly, all verbs can be nouned.  This is only a slight
overgeneralization in modern English; in hackish, however, it is good
form to mark them in some standard nonstandard way.  Thus:

    win => winnitude, winnage
    disgust => disgustitude
    hack => hackification

Further, note the prevalence of certain kinds of nonstandard plural
forms.  Some of these go back quite a ways; the TMRC Dictionary noted
that the defined plural of `caboose' is `cabeese', and includes an entry
which implies that the plural of `mouse' is {meeces}.  On a similarly
Anglo-Saxon note, almost anything ending in `x' may form plurals in
`-xen' (see {VAXen} and {boxen} in the main text).  Even words ending in
phonetic /k/ alone are sometimes treated this way; e.g., `soxen' for a
bunch of socks.  Other funny plurals are `frobbotzim' for the plural of
`frobbozz' (see {frobnitz}) and `Unices' and `Tenices' (rather than
`Unixes' and `Tenexes'; see {UNIX}, {TENEX} in main text).  But note
that `Unixen' and `Tenexen' are never used; it has been suggested that
this is because `-ix' and `-ex' are Latin singular endings that attract
a Latinate plural.  Finally, it has been suggested to general approval
that the plural of `mongoose' ought to be `polygoose'.

The pattern here, as with other hackish grammatical quirks, is
generalization of an inflectional rule that in English is either an
import or a fossil (such as the Hebrew plural ending `-im', or the
Anglo-Saxon plural suffix `-en') to cases where it isn't normally
considered to apply.

This is not `poor grammar', as hackers are generally quite well aware of
what they are doing when they distort the language.  It is grammatical
creativity, a form of playfulness.  It is done not to impress but to
amuse, and never at the expense of clarity.


Spoken inarticulations ---------------------- Words such as `mumble',
`sigh', and `groan' are spoken in places where their referent might more
naturally be used.  It has been suggested that this usage derives from
the impossibility of representing such noises on a comm link or in email
(interestingly, the same sorts of constructions have been showing up
with increasing frequency in comic strips).  Another expression
sometimes heard is "Complain!", meaning "I have a complaint!"


Of the five listed constructions, verb doubling, peculiar noun
formations, and (especially) spoken inarticulations have become quite
general; but punning jargon is still largely confined to MIT and other
large universities, and the `-P' convention is found only where LISPers
flourish.

Semantically, one rich source of jargon constructions is the hackish
tendency to anthropomorphize hardware and software.  This isn't done in
a naive way; hackers don't personalize their stuff in the sense of
feeling empathy with it, nor do they mystically believe that the things
they work on every day are `alive'.  What *is* common is to hear
hardware or software talked about as though it has homunculi talking to
each other inside it, with intentions and desires.  Thus, one hears "The
protocol handler got confused", or that programs "are trying" to do
things, or one may say of a routine that "its goal in life is to X".
One even hears explanations like "...  and its poor little brain
couldn't understand X, and it died."  Sometimes modelling things this
way actually seems to make them easier to understand, perhaps because
it's instinctively natural to think of anything with a really complex
behavioral repertoire as `like a person' rather than `like a thing'.

Finally, note that many words in hacker jargon have to be understood as
members of sets of comparatives.  This is especially true of the
adjectives and nouns used to describe the beauty and functional quality
of code.  Here is an approximately correct spectrum:

    monstrosity  brain-damage  screw  bug  lose  misfeature
    crock  kluge  hack  win  feature  elegance  perfection

The last is spoken of as a mythical absolute, approximated but never
actually attained.  Another similar scale is used for describing the
reliability of software:

    broken  flaky  dodgy  fragile  brittle
    solid  robust  bulletproof  armor-plated

Note, however, that `dodgy' is primarily Commonwealth hackish (it is
rare in the U.S.) and may change places with `flaky' for some speakers.

Coinages for describing {lossage} seem to call forth the very finest in
hackish linguistic inventiveness; it has been truly said that hackers
have even more words for equipment failures than Yiddish has for
obnoxious people.

Hacker Writing Style
====================

We've already seen that hackers often coin jargon by overgeneralizing
grammatical rules.  This is one aspect of a more general fondness for
form-versus-content language jokes that shows up particularly in hackish
writing.  One correspondent reports that he consistently misspells
`wrong' as `worng'.  Others have been known to criticize glitches in
Jargon File drafts by observing (in the mode of Douglas Hofstadter)
"This sentence no verb", or "Bad speling", or "Incorrectspa cing."
Similarly, intentional spoonerisms are often made of phrases relating to
confusion or things that are confusing; `dain bramage' for `brain
damage' is perhaps the most common (similarly, a hacker would be likely
to write "Excuse me, I'm cixelsyd today", rather than "I'm dyslexic
today").  This sort of thing is quite common and is enjoyed by all
concerned.

Hackers tend to use quotes as balanced delimiters like parentheses, much
to the dismay of American editors.  Thus, if "Jim is going" is a phrase,
and so are "Bill runs" and "Spock groks", then hackers generally prefer
to write: "Jim is going", "Bill runs", and "Spock groks".  This is
incorrect according to standard American usage (which would put the
continuation commas and the final period inside the string quotes);
however, it is counter-intuitive to hackers to mutilate literal strings
with characters that don't belong in them.  Given the sorts of examples
that can come up in discussions of programming, American-style quoting
can even be grossly misleading.  When communicating command lines or
small pieces of code, extra characters can be a real pain in the neck.

Consider, for example, a sentence in a {vi} tutorial that looks like this:

    Then delete a line from the file by typing "dd".

Standard usage would make this

    Then delete a line from the file by typing "dd."

but that would be very bad -- because the reader would be prone to type
the string d-d-dot, and it happens that in `vi(1)' dot repeats the last
command accepted.  The net result would be to delete *two* lines!

The Jargon File follows hackish usage throughout.

Interestingly, a similar style is now preferred practice in Great
Britain, though the older style (which became established for
typographical reasons having to do with the aesthetics of comma and
quotes in typeset text) is still accepted there.  `Hart's Rules' and the
`Oxford Dictionary for Writers and Editors' call the hacker-like style
`new' or `logical' quoting.

Another hacker quirk is a tendency to distinguish between `scare' quotes
and `speech' quotes; that is, to use British-style single quotes for
marking and reserve American-style double quotes for actual reports of
speech or text included from elsewhere.  Interestingly, some authorities
describe this as correct general usage, but mainstream American English
has gone to using double-quotes indiscriminately enough that hacker
usage appears marked [and, in fact, I thought this was a personal quirk
of mine until I checked with USENET --- ESR].  One further permutation
that is definitely *not* standard is a hackish tendency to do marking
quotes by using apostrophes in pairs; that is, 'like this'.  This is
modelled on string and character literal syntax in some programming
languages (reinforced by the fact that many character-only terminals
display the apostrophe in typewriter style, as a vertical single quote).

One quirk that shows up frequently in the {email} style of UNIX hackers
in particular is a tendency for some things that are normally
all-lowercase (including usernames and the names of commands and C
routines) to remain uncapitalized even when they occur at the beginning
of sentences.  It is clear that, for many hackers, the case of such
identifiers becomes a part of their internal representation (the
`spelling') and cannot be overridden without mental effort (an
appropriate reflex because UNIX and C both distinguish cases and
confusing them can lead to {lossage}).  A way of escaping this dilemma
is simply to avoid using these constructions at the beginning of
sentences.

There seems to be a meta-rule behind these nonstandard hackerisms to the
effect that precision of expression is more important than conformance
to traditional rules; where the latter create ambiguity or lose
information they can be discarded without a second thought.  It is
notable in this respect that other hackish inventions (for example, in
vocabulary) also tend to carry very precise shades of meaning even when
constructed to appear slangy and loose.  In fact, to a hacker, the
contrast between `loose' form and `tight' content in jargon is a
substantial part of its humor!

Hackers have also developed a number of punctuation and emphasis
conventions adapted to single-font all-ASCII communications links, and
these are occasionally carried over into written documents even when
normal means of font changes, underlining, and the like are available.

One of these is that TEXT IN ALL CAPS IS INTERPRETED AS `LOUD', and this
becomes such an ingrained synesthetic reflex that a person who goes to
caps-lock while in {talk mode} may be asked to "stop shouting, please,
you're hurting my ears!".

Also, it is common to use bracketing with unusual characters to signify
emphasis.  The asterisk is most common, as in "What the *hell*?" even
though this interferes with the common use of the asterisk suffix as a
footnote mark.  The underscore is also common, suggesting underlining
(this is particularly common with book titles; for example, "It is often
alleged that Joe Haldeman wrote _The_Forever_War_ as a rebuttal to
Robert Heinlein's earlier novel of the future military,
_Starship_Troopers_.").  Other forms exemplified by "=hell=", "\hell/",
or "/hell/" are occasionally seen (it's claimed that in the last example
the first slash pushes the letters over to the right to keep them from
falling down, and the second keeps them from falling over).  Finally,
words may also be emphasized line of the text.

There is a semantic difference between *emphasis like this* (which
emphasizes the phrase as a whole), and *emphasis* *like* *this* (which
suggests the writer speaking very slowly and distinctly, as if to a
very young child or a mentally impaired person).  Bracketing a word with
the `*' character may also indicate that the writer wishes readers to
consider that an action is taking place or that a sound is being made.
Examples: *bang*, *hic*, *ring*, *grin*, *kick*, *stomp*, *mumble*.

There is also an accepted convention for `writing under erasure'; the
text

    Be nice to this fool^H^H^H^Hgentleman, he's in from corporate HQ.

would be read as "Be nice to this fool, I mean this gentleman...".  This
comes from the fact that the digraph ^H is often used as a print
representation for a backspace.  It parallels (and may have been
influenced by) the ironic use of `slashouts' in science-fiction
fanzines.

In a formula, `*' signifies multiplication but two asterisks in a row
are a shorthand for exponentiation (this derives from FORTRAN).  Thus,
one might write 2 ** 8 = 256.

Another notation for exponentiation one sees more frequently uses the
caret (^, ASCII 1011110); one might write instead `2^8 = 256'.  This
goes all the way back to Algol-60, which used the archaic ASCII
`up-arrow' that later became the caret; this was picked up by Kemeny and
Kurtz's original BASIC, which in turn influenced the design of the
`bc(1)' and `dc(1)' UNIX tools, which have probably done most to
reinforce the convention on USENET.  The notation is mildly confusing to
C programmers, because `^' means logical {XOR} in C.  Despite this, it
was favored 3:1 over ** in a late-1990 snapshot of USENET.  It is used
consistently in this text.

In on-line exchanges, hackers tend to use decimal forms or improper
fractions (`3.5' or `7/2') rather than `typewriter style' mixed
fractions (`3-1/2').  The major motive here is probably that the former
are more readable in a monospaced font, together with a desire to avoid
the risk that the latter might be read as `three minus one-half'.  The
decimal form is definitely preferred for fractions with a terminating
decimal representation; there may be some cultural influence here from
the high status of scientific notation.

Another on-line convention, used especially for very large or very small
numbers, is taken from C (which derived it from FORTRAN).  This is a
form of `scientific notation' using `e' to replace `*10^'; for example,
one year is about 3e7 seconds long.

The tilde (~) is commonly used in a quantifying sense of
`approximately'; that is, `~50' means `about fifty'.

On USENET and in the {MUD} world, common C boolean, logical, and
relational operators such as `|', `&', `||', `&&', `!', `==', `!=', `>',
and `<', `>=', and `=<' are often combined with English.  The Pascal
not-equals, `<>', is also recognized, and occasionally one sees `/=' for
not-equals (from Ada, Common Lisp, and Fortran 90).  The use of prefix
`!' as a loose synonym for `not-' or `no-' is particularly common; thus,
`!clue' is read `no-clue' or `clueless'.

Another habit is that of using angle-bracket enclosure to genericize a
term; this derives from conventions used in {BNF}.  Uses like the
following are common:

    So this <ethnic> walks into a bar one day, and...

Hackers also mix letters and numbers more freely than in mainstream
usage.  In particular, it is good hackish style to write a digit
sequence where you intend the reader to understand the text string that
names that number in English.  So, hackers prefer to write `1970s'
rather than `nineteen-seventies' or `1970's' (the latter looks like a
possessive).

It should also be noted that hackers exhibit much less reluctance to use
multiply nested parentheses than is normal in English.  Part of this is
almost certainly due to influence from LISP (which uses deeply nested
parentheses (like this (see?)) in its syntax a lot), but it has also
been suggested that a more basic hacker trait of enjoying playing with
complexity and pushing systems to their limits is in operation.

One area where hackish conventions for on-line writing are still in some
flux is the marking of included material from earlier messages --- what
would be called `block quotations' in ordinary English.  From the usual
typographic convention employed for these (smaller font at an extra
indent), there derived the notation of included text being indented by
one ASCII TAB (0001001) character, which under UNIX and many other
environments gives the appearance of an 8-space indent.

Early mail and netnews readers had no facility for including messages
this way, so people had to paste in copy manually.  BSD `Mail(1)' was
the first message agent to support inclusion, and early USENETters
emulated its style.  But the TAB character tended to push included text
too far to the right (especially in multiply nested inclusions), leading
to ugly wraparounds.  After a brief period of confusion (during which an
inclusion leader consisting of three or four spaces became established
in EMACS and a few mailers), the use of leading `>' or `> ' became
standard, perhaps owing to its use in `ed(1)' to display tabs
(alternatively, it may derive from the `>' that some early UNIX mailers
used to quote lines starting with "From" in text, so they wouldn't look
like the beginnings of new message headers).  Inclusions within
inclusions keep their `>' leaders, so the `nesting level' of a quotation
is visually apparent.

A few other idiosyncratic quoting styles survive because they are
automatically generated.  One particularly ugly one looks like this:

    /* Written hh:mm pm  Mmm dd, yyyy by user@site in <group> */
    /* ---------- "Article subject, chopped to 35 ch" ---------- */
       <quoted text>
    /* End of text from local:group */

It is generated by an elderly, variant news-reading system called
`notesfiles'.  The overall trend, however, is definitely away from such
verbosity.

The practice of including text from the parent article when posting a
followup helped solve what had been a major nuisance on USENET: the fact
that articles do not arrive at different sites in the same order.
Careless posters used to post articles that would begin with, or even
consist entirely of, "No, that's wrong" or "I agree" or the like.  It
was hard to see who was responding to what.  Consequently, around 1984,
new news-posting software evolved a facility to automatically include
the text of a previous article, marked with "> " or whatever the poster
chose.  The poster was expected to delete all but the relevant lines.
The result has been that, now, careless posters post articles containing
the *entire* text of a preceding article, *followed* only by "No, that's
wrong" or "I agree".

Many people feel that this cure is worse than the original disease, and
there soon appeared newsreader software designed to let the reader skip
over included text if desired.  Today, some posting software rejects
articles containing too high a proportion of lines beginning with `>' --
but this too has led to undesirable workarounds, such as the deliberate
inclusion of zero-content filler lines which aren't quoted and thus pull
the message below the rejection threshold.

Because the default mailers supplied with UNIX and other operating
systems haven't evolved as quickly as human usage, the older conventions
using a leading TAB or three or four spaces are still alive; however,
>-inclusion is now clearly the prevalent form in both netnews and mail.

In 1991 practice is still evolving, and disputes over the `correct'
inclusion style occasionally lead to {holy wars}.  One variant style
reported uses the citation character `|' in place of `>' for extended
quotations where original variations in indentation are being retained.
One also sees different styles of quoting a number of authors in the
same message: one (deprecated because it loses information) uses a
leader of `> ' for everyone, another (the most common) is `> > > > ', `>
> > ', etc. (or `>>>> ', `>>> ', etc., depending on line length and
nesting depth) reflecting the original order of messages, and yet
another is to use a different citation leader for each author, say `> ',
`: ', `| ', `} ' (preserving nesting so that the inclusion order of
messages is still apparent, or tagging the inclusions with authors'
names).  Yet *another* style is to use each poster's initials (or login
name) as a citation leader for that poster.  Occasionally one sees a `#
' leader used for quotations from authoritative sources such as
standards documents; the intended allusion is to the root prompt (the
special UNIX command prompt issued when one is running as the privileged
super-user).

Finally, it is worth mentioning that many studies of on-line
communication have shown that electronic links have a de-inhibiting
effect on people.  Deprived of the body-language cues through which
emotional state is expressed, people tend to forget everything about
other parties except what is presented over that ASCII link.  This has
both good and bad effects.  The good one is that it encourages honesty
and tends to break down hierarchical authority relationships; the bad is
that it may encourage depersonalization and gratuitous rudeness.
Perhaps in response to this, experienced netters often display a sort of
conscious formal politesse in their writing that has passed out of
fashion in other spoken and written media (for example, the phrase "Well
said, sir!" is not uncommon).

Many introverted hackers who are next to inarticulate in person
communicate with considerable fluency over the net, perhaps precisely
because they can forget on an unconscious level that they are dealing
with people and thus don't feel stressed and anxious as they would face
to face.

Though it is considered gauche to publicly criticize posters for poor
spelling or grammar, the network places a premium on literacy and
clarity of expression.  It may well be that future historians of
literature will see in it a revival of the great tradition of personal
letters as art.

Hacker Speech Style
===================

Hackish speech generally features extremely precise diction, careful
word choice, a relatively large working vocabulary, and relatively
little use of contractions or street slang.  Dry humor, irony, puns, and
a mildly flippant attitude are highly valued --- but an underlying
seriousness and intelligence are essential.  One should use just enough
jargon to communicate precisely and identify oneself as a member of the
culture; overuse of jargon or a breathless, excessively gung-ho attitude
is considered tacky and the mark of a loser.

This speech style is a variety of the precisionist English normally
spoken by scientists, design engineers, and academics in technical
fields.  In contrast with the methods of jargon construction, it is
fairly constant throughout hackerdom.

It has been observed that many hackers are confused by negative
questions --- or, at least, that the people to whom they are talking are
often confused by the sense of their answers.  The problem is that they
have done so much programming that distinguishes between

    if (going) {

and

    if (!going) {

that when they parse the question "Aren't you going?" it seems to be
asking the opposite question from "Are you going?", and so merits an
answer in the opposite sense.  This confuses English-speaking
non-hackers because they were taught to answer as though the negative
part weren't there.  In some other languages (including Russian,
Chinese, and Japanese) the hackish interpretation is standard and the
problem wouldn't arise.  Hackers often find themselves wishing for a
word like French `si' or German `doch' with which one could
unambiguously answer `yes' to a negative question.

For similar reasons, English-speaking hackers almost never use double
negatives, even if they live in a region where colloquial usage allows
them.  The thought of uttering something that logically ought to be an
affirmative knowing it will be misparsed as a negative tends to disturb
them.

International Style
===================

Although the Jargon File remains primarily a lexicon of hacker usage in
American English, we have made some effort to get input from abroad.
Though the hacker-speak of other languages often uses translations of
jargon from English (often as transmitted to them by earlier Jargon File
versions!), the local variations are interesting, and knowledge of them
may be of some use to travelling hackers.

There are some references herein to `Commonwealth English'.  These are
intended to describe some variations in hacker usage as reported in the
English spoken in Great Britain and the Commonwealth (Canada, Australia,
India, etc. --- though Canada is heavily influenced by American usage).
There is also an entry on {{Commonwealth Hackish}} reporting some
general phonetic and vocabulary differences from U.S. hackish.

Hackers in Western Europe and (especially) Scandinavia are reported to
often use a mixture of English and their native languages for technical
conversation.  Occasionally they develop idioms in their English usage
that are influenced by their native-language styles.  Some of these are
reported here.

A few notes on hackish usages in Russian have been added where they are
parallel with English idioms and thus comprehensible to
English-speakers.

How to Use the Lexicon
**********************

Pronunciation Guide
===================

Pronunciation keys are provided in the jargon listings for all entries
that are neither dictionary words pronounced as in standard English nor
obvious compounds thereof.  Slashes bracket phonetic pronunciations,
which are to be interpreted using the following conventions:

 1. Syllables are hyphen-separated, except that an accent or back-accent
    follows each accented syllable (the back-accent marks a secondary
    accent in some words of four or more syllables).

 2. Consonants are pronounced as in American English.  The letter `g' is
    always hard (as in "got" rather than "giant"); `ch' is soft
    ("church" rather than "chemist").  The letter `j' is the sound
    that occurs twice in "judge".  The letter `s' is always as in
    "pass", never a z sound.  The digraph `kh' is the guttural of
    "loch" or "l'chaim".

 3. Uppercase letters are pronounced as their English letter names; thus
    (for example) /H-L-L/ is equivalent to /aitch el el/.  /Z/ may
    be pronounced /zee/ or /zed/ depending on your local dialect.

 4. Vowels are represented as follows:

    a
           back, that
    ar
           far, mark
    aw
           flaw, caught
    ay
           bake, rain
    e
           less, men
    ee
           easy, ski
    eir
           their, software
    i
           trip, hit
    i:
           life, sky
    o
           father, palm
    oh
           flow, sew
    oo
           loot, through
    or
           more, door
    ow
           out, how
    oy
           boy, coin
    uh
           but, some
    u
           put, foot
    y
           yet, young
    yoo
           few, chew
    [y]oo
           /oo/ with optional fronting as in `news' (/nooz/ or /nyooz/)

A /*/ is used for the `schwa' sound of unstressed or occluded vowels
(the one that is often written with an upside-down `e').  The schwa
vowel is omitted in syllables containing vocalic r, l, m or n; that is,
`kitten' and `color' would be rendered /kit'n/ and /kuhl'r/, not
/kit'*n/ and /kuhl'*r/.

Entries with a pronunciation of `//' are written-only usages.  (No, UNIX
weenies, this does *not* mean `pronounce like previous pronunciation'!)

Other Lexicon Conventions
=========================

Entries are sorted in case-blind ASCII collation order (rather than the
letter-by-letter order ignoring interword spacing common in mainstream
dictionaries), except that all entries beginning with nonalphabetic
characters are sorted after Z.  The case-blindness is a feature, not a
bug.

In pure ASCII renderings of the Jargon File, you will see {} used to
bracket words which themselves have entries in the File.  This isn't
done all the time for every such word, but it is done everywhere that a
reminder seems useful that the term has a jargon meaning and one might
wish to refer to its entry.

In this all-ASCII version, headwords for topic entries are distinguished
from those for ordinary entries by being followed by "::" rather than
":"; similarly, references are surrounded by "{{" and "}}" rather than
"{" and "}".

Defining instances of terms and phrases appear in `slanted type'.  A
defining instance is one which occurs near to or as part of an
explanation of it.
Prefix * is used as linguists do; to mark examples of incorrect usage.

We follow the `logical' quoting convention described in the Writing
Style section above.  In addition, we reserve double quotes for actual
excerpts of text or (sometimes invented) speech.  Scare quotes (which
mark a word being used in a nonstandard way), and philosopher's quotes
(which turn an utterance into the string of letters or words that name
it) are both rendered with single quotes.

References such as `malloc(3)' and `patch(1)' are to UNIX facilities
(some of which, such as `patch(1)', are actually freeware distributed
over USENET).  The UNIX manuals use `foo(n)' to refer to item foo in
section (n) of the manual, where n=1 is utilities, n=2 is system calls,
n=3 is C library routines, n=6 is games, and n=8 (where present) is
system administration utilities.  Sections 4, 5, and 7 of the manuals
have changed roles frequently and in any case are not referred to in any
of the entries.

Various abbreviations used frequently in the lexicon are summarized here:

abbrev.
    abbreviation
adj.
    adjective
adv.
    adverb
alt.
    alternate
cav.
    caveat
esp.
    especially
excl.
    exclamation
imp.
    imperative
interj.
    interjection
n.
    noun
obs.
    obsolete
pl.
    plural
poss.
    possibly
pref.
    prefix
prob.
    probably
prov.
    proverbial
quant.
    quantifier
suff.
    suffix
syn.
    synonym (or synonymous with)
v.
    verb (may be transitive or intransitive)
var.
    variant
vi.
    intransitive verb
vt.
    transitive verb

Where alternate spellings or pronunciations are given, alt.
separates two possibilities with nearly equal distribution, while
var. prefixes one that is markedly less common than the primary.

Where a term can be attributed to a particular subculture or is known
to have originated there, we have tried to so indicate.  Here is a
list of abbreviations used in etymologies:

Berkeley
    University of California at Berkeley
Cambridge
    the university in England (*not* the city in Massachusetts where
    MIT happens to be located!)
BBN
    Bolt, Beranek & Newman
CMU
    Carnegie-Mellon University
Commodore
    Commodore Business Machines
DEC
    The Digital Equipment Corporation
Fairchild
    The Fairchild Instruments Palo Alto development group
Fidonet
    See the {Fidonet} entry
IBM
    International Business Machines
MIT
    Massachusetts Institute of Technology; esp. the legendary MIT AI Lab
    culture of roughly 1971 to 1983 and its feeder groups, including the
    Tech Model Railroad Club
NYU
    New York University
OED
    The Oxford English Dictionary
Purdue
    Purdue University
SAIL
    Stanford Artificial Intelligence Laboratory (at Stan-ford University)
SI
    >From Syst`eme International, the name for the standard conventions
    of metric nomenclature used in the sciences
Stanford
    Stanford University
Sun
    Sun Microsystems
TMRC
    Some MITisms go back as far as the Tech Model Railroad Club (TMRC) at
    MIT c. 1960.  Material marked TMRC is from `An Abridged Dictionary
    of the TMRC Language', originally compiled by Pete Samson in 1959
UCLA
    University of California at Los Angeles
UK
    the United Kingdom (England, Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland)
USENET
    See the {USENET} entry
WPI
    Worcester Polytechnic Institute, site of a very active community of
    PDP-10 hackers during the 1970s
XEROX PARC
    XEROX's Palo Alto Research Center, site of much pioneering research in
    user interface design and networking
Yale
    Yale University


Some other etymology abbreviations such as {UNIX} and {PDP-10}
refer to technical cultures surrounding specific operating systems,
processors, or other environments.  The fact that a term is labelled
with any one of these abbreviations does not necessarily mean its use
is confined to that culture.  In particular, many terms labelled `MIT'
and `Stanford' are in quite general use.  We have tried to give some
indication of the distribution of speakers in the usage notes;
however, a number of factors mentioned in the introduction conspire to
make these indications less definite than might be desirable.

A few new definitions attached to entries are marked [proposed].
These are usually generalizations suggested by editors or USENET
respondents in the process of commenting on previous definitions of
those entries.  These are *not* represented as established
jargon.
Format For New Entries
======================

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The Jargon Lexicon
******************

= A =
=====

abbrev: /*-breev'/, /*-brev'/ n. Common abbreviation for
  `abbreviation'.

ABEND: [ABnormal END] /ah'bend/, /*-bend'/ n. Abnormal
  termination (of software); {crash}; {lossage}.  Derives from an
  error message on the IBM 360; used jokingly by hackers but
  seriously mainly by {code grinder}s.  Usually capitalized, but may
  appear as `abend'.  Hackers will try to persuade you that ABEND is
  called `abend' because it is what system operators do to the
  machine late on Friday when they want to call it a day, and hence
  is from the German `Abend' = `Evening'.

accumulator: n. 1. Archaic term for a register.  On-line use of it
  as a synonym for `register' is a fairly reliable indication that
  the user has been around for quite a while and/or that the
  architecture under discussion is quite old.  The term in full is
  almost never used of microprocessor registers, for example, though
  symbolic names for arithmetic registers beginning in `A' derive
  from historical use of the term `accumulator' (and not, actually,
  from `arithmetic').  Confusingly, though, an `A' register name
  prefix may also stand for `address', as for example on the
  Motorola 680x0 family.  2. A register being used for arithmetic or
  logic (as opposed to addressing or a loop index), especially one
  being used to accumulate a sum or count of many items.  This use is
  in context of a particular routine or stretch of code.  "The
  FOOBAZ routine uses A3 as an accumulator."  3. One's in-basket
  (esp. among old-timers who might use sense 1).  "You want this
  reviewed?  Sure, just put it in the accumulator."  (See {stack}.)

ACK: /ak/ interj. 1. [from the ASCII mnemonic for 0000110]
  Acknowledge.  Used to register one's presence (compare mainstream
  *Yo!*).  An appropriate response to {ping} or {ENQ}.
  2. [from the comic strip "Bloom County"] An exclamation of
  surprised disgust, esp. in "Ack pffft!"  Semi-humorous.
  Generally this sense is not spelled in caps (ACK) and is
  distinguished by a following exclamation point.  3. Used to
  politely interrupt someone to tell them you understand their point
  (see {NAK}).  Thus, for example, you might cut off an overly
  long explanation with "Ack.  Ack.  Ack.  I get it now".

  There is also a usage "ACK?" (from sense 1) meaning "Are you
  there?", often used in email when earlier mail has produced no
  reply, or during a lull in {talk mode} to see if the person has
  gone away (the standard humorous response is of course {NAK}
  (sense 2), i.e., "I'm not here").

ad-hockery: /ad-hok'*r-ee/ [Purdue] n. 1. Gratuitous assumptions
  made inside certain programs, esp. expert systems, which lead to
  the appearance of semi-intelligent behavior but are in fact
  entirely arbitrary.  For example, fuzzy-matching input tokens that
  might be typing errors against a symbol table can make it look as
  though a program knows how to spell.  2. Special-case code to cope
  with some awkward input that would otherwise cause a program to
  {choke}, presuming normal inputs are dealt with in some cleaner
  and more regular way.  Also called `ad-hackery', `ad-hocity'
  (/ad-hos'*-tee/).  See also {ELIZA effect}.

Ada:: n. A {{Pascal}}-descended language that has been made
  mandatory for Department of Defense software projects by the
  Pentagon.  Hackers are nearly unanimous in observing that,
  technically, it is precisely what one might expect given that kind
  of endorsement by fiat; designed by committee, crockish, difficult
  to use, and overall a disastrous, multi-billion-dollar boondoggle
  (one common description is "The PL/I of the 1980s").  Hackers
  find Ada's exception-handling and inter-process communication
  features particularly hilarious.  Ada Lovelace (the daughter of
  Lord Byron who became the world's first programmer while
  cooperating with Charles Babbage on the design of his mechanical
  computing engines in the mid-1800s) would almost certainly blanch
  at the use to which her name has latterly been put; the kindest
  thing that has been said about it is that there is probably a good
  small language screaming to get out from inside its vast,
  {elephantine} bulk.

adger: /aj'r/ [UCLA] vt. To make a bonehead move with consequences
  that could have been foreseen with a slight amount of mental
  effort.  E.g., "He started removing files and promptly adgered the
  whole project".  Compare {dumbass attack}.

admin: /ad-min'/ n. Short for `administrator'; very commonly
  used in speech or on-line to refer to the systems person in charge
  on a computer.  Common constructions on this include `sysadmin'
  and `site admin' (emphasizing the administrator's role as a site
  contact for email and news) or `newsadmin' (focusing specifically
  on news).  Compare {postmaster}, {sysop}, {system
  mangler}.

ADVENT: /ad'vent/ n. The prototypical computer adventure game, first
  implemented on the {PDP-10} by Will Crowther as an attempt at
  computer-refereed fantasy gaming, and expanded into a
  puzzle-oriented game by Don Woods.  Now better known as Adventure,
  but the {{TOPS-10}} operating system permitted only 6-letter
  filenames.  See also {vadding}.

  This game defined the terse, dryly humorous style now expected in
  text adventure games, and popularized several tag lines that have
  become fixtures of hacker-speak:  "A huge green fierce snake bars
  the way!"  "I see no X here" (for some noun X).  "You are in a
  maze of twisty little passages, all alike."  "You are in a little
  maze of twisty passages, all different."  The `magic words'
  {xyzzy} and {plugh} also derive from this game.

  Crowther, by the way, participated in the exploration of the
  Mammoth & Flint Ridge cave system; it actually *has* a
  `Colossal Cave' and a `Bedquilt' as in the game, and the `Y2' that
  also turns up is cavers' jargon for a map reference to a secondary
  entrance.

AI-complete: /A-I k*m-pleet'/ [MIT, Stanford: by analogy with
  `NP-complete' (see {NP-})] adj. Used to describe problems or
  subproblems in AI, to indicate that the solution presupposes a
  solution to the `strong AI problem' (that is, the synthesis of a
  human-level intelligence).  A problem that is AI-complete is, in
  other words, just too hard.

  Examples of AI-complete problems are `The Vision Problem'
  (building a system that can see as well as a human) and `The
  Natural Language Problem' (building a system that can understand
  and speak a natural language as well as a human).  These may appear
  to be modular, but all attempts so far (1991) to solve them have
  foundered on the amount of context information and `intelligence'
  they seem to require. See also {gedanken}.

AI koans: /A-I koh'anz/ pl.n. A series of pastiches of Zen
  teaching riddles created by Danny Hillis at the MIT AI Lab around
  various major figures of the Lab's culture (several are included in
  appendix A).  See also {ha ha only serious}, {mu}, and
  {{Humor, Hacker}}.

AIDS: /aydz/ n. Short for A* Infected Disk Syndrome (`A*' is a
  {glob} pattern that matches, but is not limited to, Apple),
  this condition is quite often the result of practicing unsafe
  {SEX}.  See {virus}, {worm}, {Trojan horse},
  {virgin}.

airplane rule: n. "Complexity increases the possibility of
  failure; a twin-engine airplane has twice as many engine problems
  as a single-engine airplane."  By analogy, in both software and
  electronics, the rule that simplicity increases robustness (see
  also {KISS Principle}).  It is correspondingly argued that the
  right way to build reliable systems is to put all your eggs in one
  basket, after making sure that you've built a really *good*
  basket.

aliasing bug: n. A class of subtle programming errors that can
  arise in code that does dynamic allocation, esp. via
  `malloc(3)' or equivalent.  If more than one pointer addresses
  (`aliases for') a given hunk of storage, it may happen that the
  storage is freed through one alias and then referenced through
  another, which may lead to subtle (and possibly intermittent) lossage
  depending on the state and the allocation history of the malloc
  {arena}.  Avoidable by use of allocation strategies that never
  alias allocated core.  Also avoidable by use of higher-level
  languages, such as {LISP}, which employ a garbage collector
  (see {GC}).  Also called a {stale pointer bug}.  See also
  {precedence lossage}, {smash the stack}, {fandango on core},
  {memory leak}, {overrun screw}, {spam}.

  Historical note: Though this term is nowadays associated with
  C programming, it was already in use in a very similar sense in the
  Algol-60 and FORTRAN communities in the 1960s.

all-elbows: adj. Of a TSR (terminate-and-stay-resident) IBM PC
  program, such as the N pop-up calendar and calculator utilities
  that circulate on {BBS} systems: unsociable.  Used to describe a
  program that rudely steals the resources that it needs without
  considering that other TSRs may also be resident.  One particularly
  common form of rudeness is lock-up due to programs fighting over
  the keyboard interrupt.  See also {mess-dos}.

alpha particles: n. See {bit rot}.

ALT: /awlt/ 1. n. The ALT shift key on an IBM PC or {clone}.
  2. [possibly lowercased] n. The `clover' or `Command' key on a
  Macintosh; use of this term usually reveals that the speaker hacked
  PCs before coming to the Mac (see also {command key}).  Some Mac
  hackers, confusingly, reserve `ALT' for the Option key.  3. n.obs.
  [PDP-10] Alternate name for the ASCII ESC character (ASCII
  0011011), after the keycap labeling on some older terminals.  Also
  `ALTMODE' (/awlt'mohd/).  This character was almost never
  pronounced `escape' on an ITS system, in {TECO}, or under
  TOPS-10 --- always ALT, as in "Type ALT ALT to end a TECO
  command" or "ALT U onto the system" (for "log onto the [ITS]
  system").  This was probably because ALT is more convenient to say
  than `escape', especially when followed by another ALT or a
  character (or another ALT *and* a character, for that matter).

alt bit: /awlt bit/ [from alternate] adj. See {meta bit}.

Aluminum Book: [MIT] n. `Common LISP: The Language', by
  Guy L.  Steele Jr. (Digital Press, first edition 1984, second
  edition 1990).  Note that due to a technical screwup some printings
  of the second edition are actually of a color the author describes
  succinctly as "yucky green".  See also {{book titles}}.

amoeba: n. Humorous term for the Commodore Amiga personal computer.

amp off: [Purdue] vt. To run in {background}.  From the UNIX shell `&'
  operator.

amper: n. Common abbreviation for the name of the ampersand (`&',
  ASCII 0100110) character.  See {ASCII} for other synonyms.

angle brackets: n. Either of the characters `<' (ASCII
  0111100) and `>' (ASCII 0111110) (ASCII less-than or
  greater-than signs).  The {Real World} angle brackets used by
  typographers are actually taller than a less-than or greater-than
  sign.
  See {broket}, {{ASCII}}.

angry fruit salad: n. A bad visual-interface design that uses too
  many colors.  This derives, of course, from the bizarre day-glo
  colors found in canned fruit salad.  Too often one sees similar
  affects from interface designers using color window systems such as
  {X}; there is a tendency to create displays that are flashy and
  attention-getting but uncomfortable for long-term use.

AOS: 1. /aws/ (East Coast), /ay-os/ (West Coast) [based on a
  PDP-10 increment instruction] vt.,obs. To increase the amount of
  something.  "AOS the campfire."  Usage: considered silly, and now
  obsolete.  Now largely supplanted by {bump}.  See {SOS}.  2. A
  {{Multics}}-derived OS supported at one time by Data General.  This
  was pronounced /A-O-S/ or /A-os/.  A spoof of the standard
  AOS system administrator's manual (`How to load and generate
  your AOS system') was created, issued a part number, and circulated
  as photocopy folklore.  It was called `How to goad and
  levitate your chaos system'.  3. Algebraic Operating System, in
  reference to those calculators which use infix instead of postfix
  (reverse Polish) notation.

  Historical note: AOS in sense 1 was the name of a {PDP-10}
  instruction that took any memory location in the computer and added
  1 to it; AOS meant `Add One and do not Skip'.  Why, you may ask,
  does the `S' stand for `do not Skip' rather than for `Skip'?  Ah,
  here was a beloved piece of PDP-10 folklore.  There were eight such
  instructions: AOSE added 1 and then skipped the next instruction
  if the result was Equal to zero; AOSG added 1 and then skipped if
  the result was Greater than 0; AOSN added 1 and then skipped
  if the result was Not 0; AOSA added 1 and then skipped Always;
  and so on.  Just plain AOS didn't say when to skip, so it never
  skipped.

  For similar reasons, AOJ meant `Add One and do not Jump'.  Even
  more bizarre, SKIP meant `do not SKIP'!  If you wanted to skip the
  next instruction, you had to say `SKIPA'.  Likewise, JUMP meant
  `do not JUMP'; the unconditional form was JUMPA.  However, hackers
  never did this.  By some quirk of the 10's design, the {JRST}
  (Jump and ReSTore flag with no flag specified) was actually faster
  and so was invariably used.  Such were the perverse mysteries of
  assembler programming.

app: /ap/ n. Short for `application program', as opposed to a
  systems program.  What systems vendors are forever chasing
  developers to create for their environments so they can sell more
  boxes.  Hackers tend not to think of the things they themselves run
  as apps; thus, in hacker parlance the term excludes compilers,
  program editors, games, and messaging systems, though a user would
  consider all those to be apps.  Oppose {tool}, {operating
  system}.

arc: [primarily MSDOS] vt. To create a compressed {archive} from a
  group of files using SEA ARC, PKWare PKARC, or a compatible
  program.  Rapidly becoming obsolete as the ARC compression method
  is falling into disuse, having been replaced by newer compression
  techniques.  See {tar and feather}, {zip}.

arc wars: [primarily MSDOS] n. {holy wars} over which archiving
  program one should use.  The first arc war was sparked when System
  Enhancement Associates (SEA) sued PKWare for copyright and
  trademark infringement on its ARC program.  PKWare's PKARC
  outperformed ARC on both compression and speed while largely
  retaining compatibility (it introduced a new compression type that
  could be disabled for backward-compatibility).  PKWare settled out
  of court to avoid enormous legal costs (both SEA and PKWare are
  small companies); as part of the settlement, the name of PKARC was
  changed to PKPAK.  The public backlash against SEA for bringing
  suit helped to hasten the demise of ARC as a standard when PKWare
  and others introduced new, incompatible archivers with better
  compression algorithms.

archive: n. 1. A collection of several files bundled into one file
  by a program such as `ar(1)', `tar(1)', `cpio(1)',
  or {arc} for shipment or archiving (sense 2).  See also {tar
  and feather}.  2. A collection of files or archives (sense 1) made
  available from an `archive site' via {FTP} or an email server.

arena: [UNIX] n. The area of memory attached to a process by
  `brk(2)' and `sbrk(2)' and used by `malloc(3)' as
  dynamic storage.  So named from a semi-mythical `malloc:
  corrupt arena' message supposedly emitted when some early versions
  became terminally confused.  See {overrun screw}, {aliasing
  bug}, {memory leak}, {smash the stack}.

arg: /arg/ n. Abbreviation for `argument' (to a function),
  used so often as to have become a new word (like `piano' from
  `pianoforte').  "The sine function takes 1 arg, but the
  arc-tangent function can take either 1 or 2 args."  Compare
  {param}, {parm}, {var}.

armor-plated: n. Syn. for {bulletproof}.

asbestos: adj. Used as a modifier to anything intended to protect
  one from {flame}s.  Important cases of this include {asbestos
  longjohns} and {asbestos cork award}, but it is used more
  generally.

asbestos cork award: n. Once, long ago at MIT, there was a {flamer}
  so consistently obnoxious that another hacker designed, had made,
  and distributed posters announcing that said flamer had been
  nominated for the `asbestos cork award'.  Persons in any doubt as
  to the intended application of the cork should consult the
  etymology under {flame}.  Since then, it is agreed that only a
  select few have risen to the heights of bombast required to earn
  this dubious dignity --- but there is no agreement on *which*
  few.

asbestos longjohns: n. Notional garments often donned by {USENET}
  posters just before emitting a remark they expect will elicit
  {flamage}.  This is the most common of the {asbestos} coinages.
  Also `asbestos underwear', `asbestos overcoat', etc.

ASCII:: [American Standard Code for Information Interchange]
  /as'kee/ n. The predominant character set encoding of present-day
  computers.  Uses 7 bits for each character, whereas most earlier
  codes (including an early version of ASCII) used fewer.  This
  change allowed the inclusion of lowercase letters --- a major
  {win} --- but it did not provide for accented letters or any
  other letterforms not used in English (such as the German sharp-S
  and the ae-ligature
  which is a letter in, for example, Norwegian).  It could be worse,
  though.  It could be much worse.  See {{EBCDIC}} to understand how.

  Computers are much pickier and less flexible about spelling than
  humans; thus, hackers need to be very precise when talking about
  characters, and have developed a considerable amount of verbal
  shorthand for them.  Every character has one or more names --- some
  formal, some concise, some silly.  Common jargon names for ASCII
  characters are collected here.  See also individual entries for
  {bang}, {excl}, {open}, {ques}, {semi}, {shriek},
  {splat}, {twiddle}, and {Yu-Shiang Whole Fish}.

  This list derives from revision 2.3 of the USENET ASCII
  pronunciation guide.  Single characters are listed in ASCII order;
  character pairs are sorted in by first member.  For each character,
  common names are given in rough order of popularity, followed by
  names that are reported but rarely seen; official ANSI/CCITT names
  are surrounded by brokets: <>.  Square brackets mark the
  particularly silly names introduced by {INTERCAL}.  Ordinary
  parentheticals provide some usage information.

    !
         Common: {bang}; pling; excl; shriek; <exclamation mark>.
         Rare: factorial; exclam; smash; cuss; boing; yell; wow; hey;
         wham; [spark-spot]; soldier.

    "
         Common: double quote; quote.  Rare: literal mark;
         double-glitch; <quotation marks>; <dieresis>; dirk;
         [rabbit-ears]; double prime.

    #
         Common: <number sign>; pound; pound sign; hash; sharp;
         {crunch}; hex; [mesh]; octothorpe.  Rare: flash; crosshatch;
         grid; pig-pen; tictactoe; scratchmark; thud; thump; {splat}.

    $
         Common: dollar; <dollar sign>.  Rare: currency symbol; buck;
         cash; string (from BASIC); escape (when used as the echo of
         ASCII ESC); ding; cache; [big money].

    %
         Common: percent; <percent sign>; mod; grapes.  Rare:
         [double-oh-seven].

    &
         Common: <ampersand>; amper; and.  Rare: address (from C);
         reference (from C++); andpersand; bitand; background (from
         `sh(1)'); pretzel; amp.  [INTERCAL called this `ampersand';
         what could be sillier?]

    '
         Common: single quote; quote; <apostrophe>.  Rare: prime;
         glitch; tick; irk; pop; [spark]; <closing single quotation
         mark>; <acute accent>.

    ()
         Common: left/right paren; left/right parenthesis; left/right; paren/thesis;
         open/close paren; open/close; open/close parenthesis; left/right banana.
         Rare: so/al-ready; lparen/rparen; <opening/closing parenthesis>;
         open/close round bracket, parenthisey/unparenthisey; [wax/wane];
         left/right ear.

    *
         Common: star; [{splat}]; <asterisk>.  Rare: wildcard; gear;
         dingle; mult; spider; aster; times; twinkle; glob (see
         {glob}); {Nathan Hale}.

    +
         Common: <plus>; add.  Rare: cross; [intersection].

    ,
         Common: <comma>.  Rare: <cedilla>; [tail].

    -
         Common: dash; <hyphen>; <minus>.  Rare: [worm]; option; dak;
         bithorpe.

    .
         Common: dot; point; <period>; <decimal point>.  Rare: radix
         point; full stop; [spot].

    /
         Common: slash; stroke; <slant>; forward slash.  Rare:
         diagonal; solidus; over; slak; virgule; [slat].

    :
         Common: <colon>.  Rare: dots; [two-spot].

    ;
         Common: <semicolon>; semi.  Rare: weenie; [hybrid],
         pit-thwong.

    <>
         Common: <less/greater than>; left/right angle bracket;
         bra/ket; left/right broket.  Rare: from/{into, towards}; read
         from/write to; suck/blow; comes-from/gozinta; in/out;
         crunch/zap (all from UNIX); [angle/right angle].

    =
         Common: <equals>; gets; takes.  Rare: quadrathorpe;
         [half-mesh].

    ?
         Common: query; <question mark>; {ques}.  Rare: whatmark;
         [what]; wildchar; huh; hook; buttonhook; hunchback.

    @
         Common: at sign; at; strudel.  Rare: each; vortex; whorl;
         [whirlpool]; cyclone; snail; ape; cat; rose; cabbage;
         <commercial at>.

    V
         Rare: [book].

    []
         Common: left/right square bracket; <opening/closing bracket>;
         bracket/unbracket; left/right bracket.  Rare: square/unsquare;
         [U turn/U turn back].

    \
         Common: backslash; escape (from C/UNIX); reverse slash; slosh;
         backslant; backwhack.  Rare: bash; <reverse slant>; reversed
         virgule; [backslat].

    ^
         Common: hat; control; uparrow; caret; <circumflex>.  Rare:
         chevron; [shark (or shark-fin)]; to the (`to the power of');
         fang; pointer (in Pascal).

    _
         Common: <underline>; underscore; underbar; under.  Rare:
         score; backarrow; [flatworm].

    `
         Common: backquote; left quote; left single quote; open quote;
         <grave accent>; grave.  Rare: backprime; [backspark];
         unapostrophe; birk; blugle; back tick; back glitch; push;
         <opening single quotation mark>; quasiquote.

    {}
         Common: open/close brace; left/right brace; left/right
         squiggly; left/right squiggly bracket/brace; left/right curly
         bracket/brace; <opening/closing brace>.  Rare: brace/unbrace;
         curly/uncurly; leftit/rytit; left/right squirrelly;
         [embrace/bracelet].

    |
         Common: bar; or; or-bar; v-bar; pipe; vertical bar.  Rare:
         <vertical line>; gozinta; thru; pipesinta (last three from
         UNIX); [spike].

    ~
         Common: <tilde>; squiggle; {twiddle}; not.  Rare: approx;
         wiggle; swung dash; enyay; [sqiggle (sic)].

  The pronunciation of `#' as `pound' is common in the U.S. but
  a bad idea; {{Commonwealth Hackish}} has its own, rather more apposite
  use of `pound sign' (confusingly, on British keyboards the pound
  graphic
  happens to replace `#'; thus Britishers sometimes call `#'
  on a U.S.-ASCII keyboard `pound', compounding the American error).
  The U.S. usage derives from an old-fashioned commercial practice of
  using a `#' suffix to tag pound weights on bills of lading.
  The character is usually pronounced `hash' outside the U.S.

  The `uparrow' name for circumflex and `leftarrow' name for
  underline are historical relics from archaic ASCII (the 1963
  version), which had these graphics in those character positions
  rather than the modern punctuation characters.

  The `swung dash' or `approximation' sign is not quite the same
  as tilde in typeset material
  but the ASCII tilde serves for both (compare {angle
  brackets}).

  Some other common usages cause odd overlaps.  The `#',
  `$', `>', and `&' characters, for example, are all
  pronounced "hex" in different communities because various
  assemblers use them as a prefix tag for hexadecimal constants (in
  particular, `#' in many assembler-programming cultures,
  `$' in the 6502 world, `>' at Texas Instruments, and
  `&' on the BBC Micro, Sinclair, and some Z80 machines).  See
  also {splat}.

  The inability of ASCII text to correctly represent any of the
  world's other major languages makes the designers' choice of 7 bits
  look more and more like a serious {misfeature} as the use of
  international networks continues to increase (see {software
  rot}).  Hardware and software from the U.S. still tends to embody
  the assumption that ASCII is the universal character set; this is a
  a major irritant to people who want to use a character set suited
  to their own languages.  Perversely, though, efforts to solve this
  problem by proliferating `national' character sets produce an
  evolutionary pressure to use a *smaller* subset common to all
  those in use.


ASCII art: n. The fine art of drawing diagrams using the ASCII
  character set (mainly `|', `-', `/', `\', and
  `+').  Also known as `character graphics' or `ASCII
  graphics'; see also {boxology}.  Here is a serious example:


        o----)||(--+--|<----+   +---------o + D O
          L  )||(  |        |   |             C U
        A I  )||(  +-->|-+  |   +-\/\/-+--o -   T
        C N  )||(        |  |   |      |        P
          E  )||(  +-->|-+--)---+--)|--+-o      U
             )||(  |        |          | GND    T
        o----)||(--+--|<----+----------+

           A power supply consisting of a full
           wave rectifier circuit feeding a
           capacitor input filter circuit

                              Figure 1.

  And here are some very silly examples:


      |\/\/\/|     ____/|              ___    |\_/|    ___
      |      |     \ o.O|   ACK!      /   \_  |` '|  _/   \
      |      |      =(_)=  THPHTH!   /      \/     \/      \
      | (o)(o)        U             /                       \
      C      _)  (__)                \/\/\/\  _____  /\/\/\/
      | ,___|    (oo)                       \/     \/
      |   /       \/-------\         U                  (__)
     /____\        ||     | \    /---V  `v'-            oo )
    /      \       ||---W||  *  * |--|   || |`.         |_/\

                              Figure 2.

  There is an important subgenre of humorous ASCII art that takes
  advantage of the names of the various characters to tell a
  pun-based joke.

    +--------------------------------------------------------+
    |      ^^^^^^^^^^^^                                      |
    | ^^^^^^^^^^^            ^^^^^^^^^                       |
    |                 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^            ^^^^^^^^^^^^^ |
    |        ^^^^^^^         B       ^^^^^^^^^               |
    |  ^^^^^^^^^          ^^^            ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^      |
    +--------------------------------------------------------+
                 " A Bee in the Carrot Patch "

                              Figure 3.

  Within humorous ASCII art, there is for some reason an entire
  flourishing subgenre of pictures of silly cows.  Four of these are
  reproduced in Figure 2; here are three more:


             (__)              (__)              (__)
             (\/)              ($$)              (**)
      /-------\/        /-------\/        /-------\/
     / | 666 ||        / |=====||        / |     ||
    *  ||----||       *  ||----||       *  ||----||
       ~~    ~~          ~~    ~~          ~~    ~~
    Satanic cow    This cow is a Yuppie   Cow in love

                              Figure 4.

attoparsec: n. `atto-' is the standard SI prefix for
  multiplication by 10^{-18}.  A parsec (parallax-second) is
  3.26 light-years; an attoparsec is thus 3.26 * 10^{-18} light
  years, or about 3.1 cm (thus, 1 attoparsec/{microfortnight}
  equals about 1 inch/sec).  This unit is reported to be in use
  (though probably not very seriously) among hackers in the U.K.  See
  {micro-}.

autobogotiphobia: /aw'to-boh-got`*-foh'bee-*/ n. See {bogotify}.

automagically: /aw-toh-maj'i-klee/ or /aw-toh-maj'i-k*l-ee/ adv.
  Automatically, but in a way that, for some reason (typically
  because it is too complicated, or too ugly, or perhaps even too
  trivial), the speaker doesn't feel like explaining to you.  See
  {magic}.  "The C-INTERCAL compiler generates C, then automagically
  invokes `cc(1)' to produce an executable."

avatar: [CMU, Tektronix] n. Syn. {root}, {superuser}.  There
  are quite a few UNIX machines on which the name of the superuser
  account is `avatar' rather than `root'.  This quirk was
  originated by a CMU hacker who disliked the term `superuser',
  and was propagated through an ex-CMU hacker at Tektronix.

awk: 1. n. [UNIX techspeak] An interpreted language for massaging
  text data developed by Alfred Aho, Peter Weinberger, and Brian
  Kernighan (the name is from their initials).  It is characterized
  by C-like syntax, a declaration-free approach to variable typing
  and declarations, associative arrays, and field-oriented text
  processing.  See also {Perl}.  2. n.  Editing term for an
  expression awkward to manipulate through normal {regexp}
  facilities (for example, one containing a {newline}).  3. vt. To
  process data using `awk(1)'.

= B =
=====

back door: n. A hole in the security of a system deliberately left
  in place by designers or maintainers.  The motivation for this is
  not always sinister; some operating systems, for example, come out
  of the box with privileged accounts intended for use by field
  service technicians or the vendor's maintenance programmers.

  Historically, back doors have often lurked in systems longer than
  anyone expected or planned, and a few have become widely known.
  The infamous {RTM} worm of late 1988, for example, used a back door
  in the {BSD} UNIX `sendmail(8)' utility.

  Ken Thompson's 1983 Turing Award lecture to the ACM revealed the
  existence of a back door in early UNIX versions that may have
  qualified as the most fiendishly clever security hack of all time.
  The C compiler contained code that would recognize when the
  `login' command was being recompiled and insert some code
  recognizing a password chosen by Thompson, giving him entry to the
  system whether or not an account had been created for him.

  Normally such a back door could be removed by removing it from the
  source code for the compiler and recompiling the compiler.  But to
  recompile the compiler, you have to *use* the compiler --- so
  Thompson also arranged that the compiler would *recognize when
  it was compiling a version of itself*, and insert into the
  recompiled compiler the code to insert into the recompiled `login'
  the code to allow Thompson entry --- and, of course, the code to
  recognize itself and do the whole thing again the next time around!
  And having done this once, he was then able to recompile the
  compiler from the original sources, leaving his back door in place
  and active but with no trace in the sources.

  The talk that revealed this truly moby hack was published as
  "Reflections on Trusting Trust", `Communications of the
  ACM 27', 8 (August 1984), pp. 761--763.

  Syn. {trap door}; may also be called a `wormhole'.  See also
  {iron box}, {cracker}, {worm}, {logic bomb}.

backbone cabal: n. A group of large-site administrators who pushed
  through the {Great Renaming} and reined in the chaos of {USENET}
  during most of the 1980s.  The cabal {mailing list} disbanded in
  late 1988 after a bitter internal catfight, but the net hardly
noticed.

backbone site: n. A key USENET and email site; one that processes
  a large amount of third-party traffic, especially if it is the home
  site of any of the regional coordinators for the USENET maps.
  Notable backbone sites as of early 1991 include uunet and the
  mail machines at Rutgers University, UC Berkeley, DEC's Western
  Research Laboratories, Ohio State University, and the University of
  Texas.  Compare {rib site}, {leaf site}.

backgammon:: See {bignum}, {moby}, and {pseudoprime}.

background: n.,adj.,vt.  To do a task `in background' is to do
  it whenever {foreground} matters are not claiming your undivided
  attention, and `to background' something means to relegate it to
  a lower priority.  "For now, we'll just print a list of nodes and
  links; I'm working on the graph-printing problem in background."
  Note that this implies ongoing activity but at a reduced level or
  in spare time, in contrast to mainstream `back burner' (which
  connotes benign neglect until some future resumption of activity).
  Some people prefer to use the term for processing that they have
  queued up for their unconscious minds (a tack that one can often
  fruitfully take upon encountering an obstacle in creative work).
  Compare {amp off}, {slopsucker}.

  Technically, a task running in background is detached from the
  terminal where it was started (and often running at a lower
  priority); oppose {foreground}.  Nowadays this term is primarily
  associated with {{UNIX}}, but it appears to have been first used
  in this sense on OS/360.

backspace and overstrike: interj. Whoa!  Back up.  Used to suggest
  that someone just said or did something wrong.  Common among
  APL programmers.

backward combatability: /bak'w*rd k*m-bat'*-bil'*-tee/ [from
  `backward compatibility'] n. A property of hardware or software
  revisions in which previous protocols, formats, and layouts are
  discarded in favor of `new and improved' protocols, formats, and
  layouts.  Occurs usually when making the transition between major
  releases.  When the change is so drastic that the old formats are
  not retained in the new version, it is said to be `backward
  combatable'.  See {flag day}.

BAD: /B-A-D/ [IBM: acronym, `Broken As Designed'] adj.  Said
  of a program that is {bogus} because of bad design and misfeatures
  rather than because of bugginess.  See {working as designed}.

Bad Thing: [from the 1930 Sellar & Yeatman parody `1066 And
  All That'] n. Something that can't possibly result in improvement
  of the subject.  This term is always capitalized, as in "Replacing
  all of the 9600-baud modems with bicycle couriers would be a Bad
  Thing".  Oppose {Good Thing}.  British correspondents confirm
  that {Bad Thing} and {Good Thing} (and prob. therefore {Right
  Thing} and {Wrong Thing}) come from the book referenced in the
  etymology, which discusses rulers who were Good Kings but Bad
  Things.  This has apparently created a mainstream idiom on the
  British side of the pond.

bag on the side: n. An extension to an established hack that is
  supposed to add some functionality to the original.  Usually
  derogatory, implying that the original was being overextended and
  should have been thrown away, and the new product is ugly,
  inelegant, or bloated.  Also v. phrase, `to hang a bag on the side
  [of]'.  "C++?  That's just a bag on the side of C ...." "They
  want me to hang a bag on the side of the accounting system."

bagbiter: /bag'bi:t-*r/ n. 1. Something, such as a program or a
  computer, that fails to work, or works in a remarkably clumsy
  manner.  "This text editor won't let me make a file with a line
  longer than 80 characters!  What a bagbiter!"  2. A person who has
  caused you some trouble, inadvertently or otherwise, typically by
  failing to program the computer properly.  Synonyms: {loser},
  {cretin}, {chomper}.  3. adj. `bagbiting' Having the
  quality of a bagbiter.  "This bagbiting system won't let me
  compute the factorial of a negative number."  Compare {losing},
  {cretinous}, {bletcherous}, `barfucious' (under
  {barfulous}) and `chomping' (under {chomp}).  4. `bite
  the bag' vi. To fail in some manner.  "The computer keeps crashing
  every 5 minutes."  "Yes, the disk controller is really biting the
  bag."  The original loading of these terms was almost undoubtedly
  obscene, possibly referring to the scrotum, but in their current
  usage they have become almost completely sanitized.

  A program called Lexiphage on the old MIT AI PDP-10 would draw on
  a selected victim's bitmapped terminal the words "THE BAG" in
  ornate letters, and then a pair of jaws biting pieces of it off.
  This is the first and to date only known example of a program
  *intended* to be a bagbiter.

bamf: /bamf/ 1. [from old X-Men comics] interj. Notional sound made
  by a person or object teleporting in or out of the hearer's
  vicinity.  Often used in {virtual reality} (esp. {MUD})
  electronic {fora} when a character wishes to make a dramatic entrance
  or exit.  2. The sound of magical transformation, used in virtual
  reality {fora} like sense 1.  3. [from `Don Washington's
  Survival Guide'] n. Acronym for `Bad-Ass Mother Fucker', used to
  refer to one of the handful of nastiest monsters on an LPMUD or
  other similar MUD.

banana label: n. The labels often used on the sides of {macrotape}
  reels, so called because they are shaped roughly like blunt-ended
  bananas.  This term, like macrotapes themselves, is still current
  but visibly headed for obsolescence.

banana problem: n. [from the story of the little girl who said "I
  know how to spell `banana', but I don't know when to stop"].  Not
  knowing where or when to bring a production to a close (compare
  {fencepost error}).  One may say `there is a banana problem' of an
  algorithm with poorly defined or incorrect termination conditions,
  or in discussing the evolution of a design that may be succumbing
  to featuritis (see also {creeping elegance}, {creeping
  featuritis}).  See item 176 under {HAKMEM}, which describes a
  banana problem in a {Dissociated Press} implementation.

bandwidth: n. 1. Used by hackers in a generalization of its
  technical meaning as the volume of information per unit time that a
  computer, person, or transmission medium can handle.  "Those are
  amazing graphics, but I missed some of the detail --- not enough
  bandwidth, I guess."  Compare {low-bandwidth}.  2. Attention
  span.  3. On {USENET}, a measure of network capacity that is
  often wasted by people complaining about how items posted by others
  are a waste of bandwidth.

bang: 1. n. Common spoken name for `!' (ASCII 0100001),
  especially when used in pronouncing a {bang path} in spoken
  hackish.  In {elder days} this was considered a CMUish usage,
  with MIT and Stanford hackers preferring {excl} or {shriek};
  but the spread of UNIX has carried `bang' with it (esp. via the
  term {bang path}) and it is now certainly the most common spoken
  name for `!'.  Note that it is used exclusively for
  non-emphatic written `!'; one would not say "Congratulations
  bang" (except possibly for humorous purposes), but if one wanted
  to specify the exact characters `foo!' one would speak "Eff oh oh
  bang".  See {shriek}, {{ASCII}}.  2. interj. An exclamation
  signifying roughly "I have achieved enlightenment!", or "The
  dynamite has cleared out my brain!"  Often used to acknowledge
  that one has perpetrated a {thinko} immediately after one has
  been called on it.

bang on: vt. To stress-test a piece of hardware or software: "I
  banged on the new version of the simulator all day yesterday and it
  didn't crash once.  I guess it is ready to release."  The term
  {pound on} is synonymous.

bang path: n. An old-style UUCP electronic-mail address specifying
  hops to get from some assumed-reachable location to the addressee,
  so called because each {hop} is signified by a {bang} sign.
  Thus, for example, the path ...!bigsite!foovax!barbox!me
  directs people to route their mail to machine bigsite (presumably
  a well-known location accessible to everybody) and from there
  through the machine foovax to the account of user me on
  barbox.

  In the bad old days of not so long ago, before autorouting mailers
  became commonplace, people often published compound bang addresses
  using the { } convention (see {glob}) to give paths from
  *several* big machines, in the hopes that one's correspondent
  might be able to get mail to one of them reliably (example:
  ...!{seismo, ut-sally, ihnp4}!rice!beta!gamma!me).  Bang paths
  of 8 to 10 hops were not uncommon in 1981.  Late-night dial-up
  UUCP links would cause week-long transmission times.  Bang paths
  were often selected by both transmission time and reliability, as
  messages would often get lost.  See {{Internet address}},
  {network, the}, and {sitename}.

banner: n. 1. The title page added to printouts by most print
  spoolers (see {spool}).  Typically includes user or account ID
  information in very large character-graphics capitals.  Also called
  a `burst page', because it indicates where to burst (tear apart)
  fanfold paper to separate one user's printout from the next.  2. A
  similar printout generated (typically on multiple pages of fan-fold
  paper) from user-specified text, e.g., by a program such as UNIX's
  `banner({1,6})'.  3. On interactive software, a first screen
  containing a logo and/or author credits and/or a copyright notice.

bar: /bar/ n. 1. The second metasyntactic variable, after {foo}
  and before {baz}.  "Suppose we have two functions: FOO and BAR.
  FOO calls BAR...."  2. Often appended to {foo} to produce
  {foobar}.

bare metal: n. 1. New computer hardware, unadorned with such
  snares and delusions as an {operating system}, an {HLL}, or
  even assembler.  Commonly used in the phrase `programming on the
  bare metal', which refers to the arduous work of {bit bashing}
  needed to create these basic tools for a new machine.  Real
  bare-metal programming involves things like building boot proms and
  BIOS chips, implementing basic monitors used to test device
  drivers, and writing the assemblers that will be used to write the
  compiler back ends that will give the new machine a real
  development environment.  2. `Programming on the bare metal' is
  also used to describe a style of {hand-hacking} that relies on
  bit-level peculiarities of a particular hardware design, esp.
  tricks for speed and space optimization that rely on crocks such as
  overlapping instructions (or, as in the famous case described in
  appendix A, interleaving of opcodes on a magnetic drum to minimize
  fetch delays due to the device's rotational latency).  This sort of
  thing has become less common as the relative costs of programming
  time and machine resources have changed, but is still found in
  heavily constrained environments such as industrial embedded systems.
  See {real programmer}.

  In the world of personal computing, bare metal programming (especially
  in sense 1 but sometimes also in sense 2) is often considered a
  {Good Thing}, or at least a necessary thing (because these
  machines have often been sufficiently slow and poorly designed
  to make it necessary; see {ill-behaved}).  There, the term
  usually refers to bypassing the BIOS or OS interface and writing
  the application to directly access device registers and machine
  addresses.  "To get 19.2 kilobaud on the serial port, you need to
  get down to the bare metal."  People who can do this sort of thing
  are held in high regard.

barf: /barf/ [from mainstream slang meaning `vomit']
  1. interj.  Term of disgust.  This is the closest hackish
  equivalent of the Val\-speak "gag me with a spoon". (Like, euwww!)
  See {bletch}.  2. vi. To say "Barf!" or emit some similar
  expression of disgust.  "I showed him my latest hack and he
  barfed" means only that he complained about it, not that he
  literally vomited.  3. vi. To fail to work because of unacceptable
  input.  May mean to give an error message.  Examples: "The
  division operation barfs if you try to divide by 0."  (That is,
  the division operation checks for an attempt to divide by zero, and
  if one is encountered it causes the operation to fail in some
  unspecified, but generally obvious, manner.) "The text editor
  barfs if you try to read in a new file before writing out the old
  one."  See {choke}, {gag}.  In Commonwealth hackish,
  `barf' is generally replaced by `puke' or `vom'.  {barf}
  is sometimes also used as a metasyntactic variable, like {foo} or
  {bar}.

barfulation: /bar`fyoo-lay'sh*n/ interj. Variation of {barf}
  used around the Stanford area.  An exclamation, expressing disgust.
  On seeing some particularly bad code one might exclaim,
  "Barfulation!  Who wrote this, Quux?"

barfulous: /bar'fyoo-l*s/ adj. (alt. `barfucious',
  /bar-fyoo-sh*s/) Said of something that would make anyone barf,
  if only for esthetic reasons.

baroque: adj. Feature-encrusted; complex; gaudy; verging on
  excessive.  Said of hardware or (esp.) software designs, this has
  many of the connotations of {elephantine} or {monstrosity} but is
  less extreme and not pejorative in itself.  "Metafont even has
  features to introduce random variations to its letterform output.
  Now *that* is baroque!"  See also {rococo}.

BartleMUD: /bar'tl-muhd/ n. Any of the MUDs derived from the
  original MUD game by Richard Bartle (see {MUD}).  BartleMUDs are
  noted for their (usually slightly offbeat) humor, dry but friendly
  syntax, and lack of adjectives in object descriptions, so a player
  is likely to come across `brand172', for instance (see {brand
  brand brand}).  Some MUDders intensely dislike Bartle and this
  term, and prefer to speak of `MUD-1'.

BASIC: n. A programming language, originally designed for
  Dartmouth's experimental timesharing system in the
  early 1960s, which has since become the leading cause of
  brain-damage in proto-hackers.  This is another case (like
  {Pascal}) of the bad things that happen when a language
  deliberately designed as an educational toy gets taken too
  seriously.  A novice can write short BASIC programs (on the order of
  10--20 lines) very easily; writing anything longer is (a) very
  painful, and (b) encourages bad habits that will bite him/her later
  if he/she tries to hack in a real language.  This wouldn't be so
  bad if historical accidents hadn't made BASIC so common on low-end
  micros.  As it is, it ruins thousands of potential wizards a year.

batch: adj. 1. Non-interactive.  Hackers use this somewhat more
  loosely than the traditional technical definitions justify; in
  particular, switches on a normally interactive program that prepare
  it to receive non-interactive command input are often referred to
  as `batch mode' switches.  A `batch file' is a series of
  instructions written to be handed to an interactive program running
  in batch mode.  2. Performance of dreary tasks all at one sitting.
  "I finally sat down in batch mode and wrote out checks for all
  those bills; I guess they'll turn the electricity back on next
  week..." 3. Accumulation of a number of small tasks that can be
  lumped together for greater efficiency.  "I'm batching up those
  letters to send sometime" "I'm batching up bottles to take to the
  recycling center."

bathtub curve: n. Common term for the curve (resembling an
  end-to-end section of one of those claw-footed antique bathtubs)
  that describes the expected failure rate of electronics with time:
  initially high, dropping to near 0 for most of the system's
  lifetime, then rising again as it `tires out'.  See also {burn-in
  period}, {infant mortality}.

baud: /bawd/ [simplified from its technical meaning] n. Bits per
  second.  Hence kilobaud or Kbaud, thousands of bits per second.
  The technical meaning is `level transitions per second'; this
  coincides with bps only for two-level modulation with no framing or
  stop bits.  Most hackers are aware of these nuances but blithely
  ignore them.

baud barf: /bawd barf/ n. The garbage one gets on the monitor
  when using a modem connection with some protocol setting (esp.
  line speed) incorrect, or when someone picks up a voice extension
  on the same line, or when really bad line noise disrupts the
  connection.  Baud barf is not completely {random}, by the way;
  hackers with a lot of serial-line experience can usually tell
  whether the device at the other end is expecting a higher or lower
  speed than the terminal is set to.  *Really* experienced ones
  can identify particular speeds.

baz: /baz/ [Stanford: corruption of {bar}] n. 1. The third
  metasyntactic variable, after {foo} and {bar} and before
  {quux} (or, occasionally, `qux'; or local idiosyncracies like
  `rag', `zowie', etc.).  "Suppose we have three functions: FOO,
  BAR, and BAZ.  FOO calls BAR, which calls BAZ...."
  2. interj. A term of mild annoyance.  In this usage the term is
  often drawn out for 2 or 3 seconds, producing an effect not unlike
  the bleating of a sheep; /baaaaaaz/.  3. Occasionally appended to
  {foo} to produce `foobaz'.

bboard: /bee'bord/ [contraction of `bulletin board'] n.
  1. Any electronic bulletin board; esp. used of {BBS} systems
  running on personal micros, less frequently of a USENET
  {newsgroup} (in fact, use of the term for a newsgroup generally
  marks one either as a {newbie} fresh in from the BBS world or as
  a real old-timer predating USENET).  2. At CMU and other colleges
  with similar facilities, refers to campus-wide electronic bulletin
  boards.  3. The term `physical bboard' is sometimes used to
  refer to a old-fashioned, non-electronic cork memo board.  At CMU,
  it refers to a particular one outside the CS Lounge.

  In either of senses 1 or 2, the term is usually prefixed by the
  name of the intended board (`the Moonlight Casino bboard' or
  `market bboard'); however, if the context is clear, the better-read
  bboards may be referred to by name alone, as in (at CMU) "Don't
  post for-sale ads on general".

BBS: /B-B-S/ [acronym, `Bulletin Board System'] n. An electronic
  bulletin board system; that is, a message database where people can
  log in and leave broadcast messages for others grouped (typically)
  into {topic group}s.  Thousands of local BBS systems are in
  operation throughout the U.S., typically run by amateurs for fun
  out of their homes on MS-DOS boxes with a single modem line each.
  Fans of USENET and Internet or the big commercial timesharing
  bboards such as CompuServe and GEnie tend to consider local BBSes
  the low-rent district of the hacker culture, but they serve a
  valuable function by knitting together lots of hackers and users in
  the personal-micro world who would otherwise be unable to exchange
  code at all.

beam: [from Star Trek Classic's "Beam me up, Scotty!"] vt. To
  transfer {softcopy} of a file electronically; most often in
  combining forms such as `beam me a copy' or `beam that over to
  his site'.  Compare {blast}, {snarf}, {BLT}.

beanie key: [Mac users] n. See {command key}.

beep: n.,v. Syn. {feep}.  This term seems to be preferred among micro
  hobbyists.

beige toaster: n. A Macintosh. See {toaster}; compare
  {Macintrash}, {maggotbox}.

bells and whistles: [by analogy with the toyboxes on theater
  organs] n. Features added to a program or system to make it more
  {flavorful} from a hacker's point of view, without necessarily
  adding to its utility for its primary function.  Distinguished from
  {chrome}, which is intended to attract users.  "Now that we've
  got the basic program working, let's go back and add some bells and
  whistles."  No one seems to know what distinguishes a bell from a
  whistle.

bells, whistles, and gongs: n. A standard elaborated form of
  {bells and whistles}; typically said with a pronounced and ironic
  accent on the `gongs'.

benchmark: [techspeak] n. An inaccurate measure of computer
  performance.  "In the computer industry, there are three kinds of
  lies: lies, damn lies, and benchmarks."  Well-known ones include
  Whetstone, Dhrystone, Rhealstone (see {h}), the Gabriel LISP
  benchmarks (see {gabriel}), the SPECmark suite, and LINPACK.  See
  also {machoflops}, {MIPS}.

Berkeley Quality Software: adj. (often abbreviated `BQS') Term used
  in a pejorative sense to refer to software that was apparently
  created by rather spaced-out hackers late at night to solve some
  unique problem.  It usually has nonexistent, incomplete, or
  incorrect documentation, has been tested on at least two examples,
  and core dumps when anyone else attempts to use it.  This term was
  frequently applied to early versions of the `dbx(1)' debugger.
  See also {Berzerkeley}.

berklix: /berk'liks/ n.,adj. [contraction of `Berkeley UNIX'] See
  {BSD}.  Not used at Berkeley itself.  May be more common among
  {suit}s attempting to sound like cognoscenti than among hackers,
  who usually just say `BSD'.

berserking: vi. A {MUD} term meaning to gain points *only*
  by killing other players and mobiles (non-player characters).
  Hence, a Berserker-Wizard is a player character that has achieved
  enough points to become a wizard, but only by killing other
  characters.  Berserking is sometimes frowned upon because of its
  inherently antisocial nature, but some MUDs have a `berserker
  mode' in which a player becomes *permanently* berserk, can
  never flee from a fight, cannot use magic, gets no score for
  treasure, but does get double kill points.  "Berserker
  wizards can seriously damage your elf!"

Berzerkeley: /b*r-zer'klee/ [from `berserk', via the name of a
  now-deceased record label] n. Humorous distortion of `Berkeley'
  used esp. to refer to the practices or products of the
  {BSD} UNIX hackers.  See {software bloat}, {Missed'em-five},
  {Berkeley Quality Software}.

  Mainstream use of this term in reference to the cultural and
  political peculiarities of UC Berkeley as a whole has been reported
  from as far back as the 1960s.

beta: /bay't*/, /be't*/ or (Commonwealth) /bee't*/ n. 1. In
  the {Real World}, software often goes through two stages of
  testing: Alpha (in-house) and Beta (out-house?).  Software is said
  to be `in beta'.  2. Anything that is new and experimental is in
  beta. "His girlfriend is in beta" means that he is still testing
  for compatibility and reserving judgment.  3. Beta software is
  notoriously buggy, so `in beta' connotes flakiness.

  Historical note: More formally, to beta-test is to test a
  pre-release (potentially unreliable) version of a piece of software
  by making it available to selected customers and users.  This term
  derives from early 1960s terminology for product cycle checkpoints,
  first used at IBM but later standard throughout the industry.
  `Alpha Test' was the unit, module, or component test phase; `Beta
  Test' was initial system test.  These themselves came from earlier
  A- and B-tests for hardware.  The A-test was a feasibility and
  manufacturability evaluation done before any commitment to design
  and development.  The B-test was a demonstration that the
  engineering model functioned as specified.  The C-test
  (corresponding to today's beta) was the B-test performed on early
  samples of the production design.

BFI: /B-F-I/ n. See {brute force and ignorance}.  Also
  encountered in the variant `BFMI', `brute force and
  *massive* ignorance'.

bible: n. 1. One of a small number of fundamental source books
  such as {Knuth} and {K&R}.  2. The most detailed and
  authoritative reference for a particular language, operating
  system, or other complex software system.

BiCapitalization: n. The act said to have been performed on
  trademarks (such as NeXT, {NeWS}, VisiCalc, FrameMaker,
  TK!solver, EasyWriter) that have been raised above the ruck of
  common coinage by nonstandard capitalization.  Too many
  {marketroid} types think this sort of thing is really cute, even
  the 2,317th time they do it.  Compare {studlycaps}.

BIFF: /bif/ [USENET] n. The most famous {pseudo}, and the
  prototypical {newbie}.  Articles from BIFF are characterized by
  all uppercase letters sprinkled liberally with bangs, typos,
  `cute' misspellings (EVRY BUDY LUVS GOOD OLD BIFF CUZ HE"S A K00L
  DOOD AN HE RITES REEL AWESUM THINGZ IN CAPITULL LETTRS LIKE
  THIS!!!), use (and often misuse) of fragments of {talk mode}
  abbreviations, a long {sig block} (sometimes even a {doubled
  sig}), and unbounded na"ivet'e.  BIFF posts articles using his elder
  brother's VIC-20.  BIFF's location is a mystery, as his articles
  appear to come from a variety of sites.  However, {BITNET} seems to
  be the most frequent origin.  The theory that BIFF is a denizen of
  BITNET is supported by BIFF's (unfortunately invalid) electronic
  mail address: [email protected].

biff: /bif/ vt. To notify someone of incoming mail.  From the
  BSD utility `biff(1)', which was in turn named after the
  implementor's dog (it barked whenever the mailman came).  No
  relation to {BIFF}.

Big Gray Wall: n. What faces a {VMS} user searching for
  documentation.  A full VMS kit comes on a pallet, the documentation
  taking up around 15 feet of shelf space before the addition of layered
  products such as compilers, databases, multivendor networking,
  and programming tools.  Recent (since VMS version 5) DEC
  documentation comes with gray binders; under VMS version 4 the
  binders were orange (`big orange wall'), and under version 3
  they were blue.  See {VMS}.

big iron: n. Large, expensive, ultra-fast computers.  Used generally
  of {number-crunching} supercomputers such as Crays, but can include
  more conventional big commercial IBMish mainframes.  Term of
  approval; compare {heavy metal}, oppose {dinosaur}.

Big Red Switch: [IBM] n. The power switch on a computer, esp. the
  `Emergency Pull' switch on an IBM {mainframe} or the power switch
  on an IBM PC where it really is large and red.  "This !@%$%
  {bitty box} is hung again; time to hit the Big Red Switch."
  Sources at IBM report that, in tune with the company's passion for
  {TLA}s, this is often acronymized as `BRS' (this has also
  become established on FidoNet and in the PC {clone} world).  It
  is alleged that the emergency pull switch on an IBM 360/91 actually
  fired a non-conducting bolt into the main power feed; the BRSes on
  more recent machines physically drop a block into place so that
  they can't be pushed back in.  People get fired for pulling them,
  especially inappropriately (see also {molly-guard}).  Compare
  {power cycle}, {three-finger salute}, {120 reset}.

Big Room, the: n. The extremely large room with the blue ceiling
  and intensely bright light (during the day) or black ceiling with
  lots of tiny night-lights (during the night) found outside all
  computer installations.  "He can't come to the phone right now,
  he's somewhere out in the Big Room."

big win: n. Serendipity.  "Yes, those two physicists discovered
  high-temperature superconductivity in a batch of ceramic that had
  been prepared incorrectly according to their experimental schedule.
  Small mistake; big win!" See {win big}.

big-endian: [From Swift's `Gulliver's Travels' via the famous
  paper `On Holy Wars and a Plea for Peace' by Danny Cohen,
  USC/ISI IEN 137, dated April 1, 1980] adj. 1. Describes a computer
  architecture in which, within a given multi-byte numeric
  representation, the most significant byte has the lowest address
  (the word is stored `big-end-first').  Most processors, including
  the IBM 370 family, the {PDP-10}, the Motorola microprocessor
  families, and most of the various RISC designs current in mid-1991,
  are big-endian.  See {little-endian}, {middle-endian}, {NUXI
  problem}.  2. An {{Internet address}} the wrong way round.  Most
  of the world follows the Internet standard and writes email
  addresses starting with the name of the computer and ending up with
  the name of the country.  In the U.K. the Joint Networking Team had
  decided to do it the other way round before the Internet domain
  standard was established; e.g., [email protected].  Most gateway
  sites have {ad-hockery} in their mailers to handle this, but can
  still be confused.  In particular, the address above could be in the
  U.K. (domain uk) or Czechoslovakia (domain cs).

bignum: /big'nuhm/ [orig. from MIT MacLISP] n. 1. [techspeak] A
  multiple-precision computer representation for very large integers.
  More generally, any very large number.  "Have you ever looked at
  the United States Budget?  There's bignums for you!"
  2. [Stanford] In backgammon, large numbers on the dice are called
  `bignums', especially a roll of double fives or double sixes
  (compare {moby}, sense 4).  See also {El Camino Bignum}.

  Sense 1 may require some explanation.  Most computer languages
  provide a kind of data called `integer', but such computer
  integers are usually very limited in size; usually they must be
  smaller than than 2^{31} (2,147,483,648) or (on a losing
  {bitty box}) 2^{15} (32,768).  If you want to work with
  numbers larger than that, you have to use floating-point numbers,
  which are usually accurate to only six or seven decimal places.
  Computer languages that provide bignums can perform exact
  calculations on very large numbers, such as 1000!  (the factorial
  of 1000, which is 1000 times 999 times 998 times ... times 2
  times 1).  For example, this value for 1000!  was computed by the
  MacLISP system using bignums:

    40238726007709377354370243392300398571937486421071
    46325437999104299385123986290205920442084869694048
    00479988610197196058631666872994808558901323829669
    94459099742450408707375991882362772718873251977950
    59509952761208749754624970436014182780946464962910
    56393887437886487337119181045825783647849977012476
    63288983595573543251318532395846307555740911426241
    74743493475534286465766116677973966688202912073791
    43853719588249808126867838374559731746136085379534
    52422158659320192809087829730843139284440328123155
    86110369768013573042161687476096758713483120254785
    89320767169132448426236131412508780208000261683151
    02734182797770478463586817016436502415369139828126
    48102130927612448963599287051149649754199093422215
    66832572080821333186116811553615836546984046708975
    60290095053761647584772842188967964624494516076535
    34081989013854424879849599533191017233555566021394
    50399736280750137837615307127761926849034352625200
    01588853514733161170210396817592151090778801939317
    81141945452572238655414610628921879602238389714760
    88506276862967146674697562911234082439208160153780
    88989396451826324367161676217916890977991190375403
    12746222899880051954444142820121873617459926429565
    81746628302955570299024324153181617210465832036786
    90611726015878352075151628422554026517048330422614
    39742869330616908979684825901254583271682264580665
    26769958652682272807075781391858178889652208164348
    34482599326604336766017699961283186078838615027946
    59551311565520360939881806121385586003014356945272
    24206344631797460594682573103790084024432438465657
    24501440282188525247093519062092902313649327349756
    55139587205596542287497740114133469627154228458623
    77387538230483865688976461927383814900140767310446
    64025989949022222176590433990188601856652648506179
    97023561938970178600408118897299183110211712298459
    01641921068884387121855646124960798722908519296819
    37238864261483965738229112312502418664935314397013
    74285319266498753372189406942814341185201580141233
    44828015051399694290153483077644569099073152433278
    28826986460278986432113908350621709500259738986355
    42771967428222487575867657523442202075736305694988
    25087968928162753848863396909959826280956121450994
    87170124451646126037902930912088908694202851064018
    21543994571568059418727489980942547421735824010636
    77404595741785160829230135358081840096996372524230
    56085590370062427124341690900415369010593398383577
    79394109700277534720000000000000000000000000000000
    00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
    00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
    00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
    00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
    000000000000000000.

bigot: n. A person who is religiously attached to a particular
  computer, language, operating system, editor, or other tool (see
  {religious issues}).  Usually found with a specifier; thus,
  `cray bigot', {ITS bigot}, `APL bigot', `VMS bigot',
  {Berkeley bigot}.  True bigots can be distinguished from mere
  partisans or zealots by the fact that they refuse to learn
  alternatives even when the march of time and/or technology is
  threatening to obsolete the favored tool.  It is said "You can
  tell a bigot, but you can't tell him much."  Compare
  {weenie}.

bit: [from the mainstream meaning and `Binary digIT'] n.
  1. [techspeak] The unit of information; the amount of information
  obtained by asking a yes-or-no question for which the two outcomes
  are equally probable.  2. [techspeak] A computational quantity that
  can take on one of two values, such as true and false or 0 and 1.
  3. A mental flag: a reminder that something should be done
  eventually.  "I have a bit set for you."  (I haven't seen you for
  a while, and I'm supposed to tell or ask you something.)  4. More
  generally, a (possibly incorrect) mental state of belief.  "I have
  a bit set that says that you were the last guy to hack on EMACS."
  (Meaning "I think you were the last guy to hack on EMACS, and what
  I am about to say is predicated on this, so please stop me if this
  isn't true.")

  "I just need one bit from you" is a polite way of indicating that
  you intend only a short interruption for a question that can
  presumably be answered yes or no.

  A bit is said to be `set' if its value is true or 1, and
  `reset' or `clear' if its value is false or 0.  One
  speaks of setting and clearing bits.  To {toggle} or
  `invert' a bit is to change it, either from 0 to 1 or from
  1 to 0.  See also {flag}, {trit}, {mode bit}.

bit bang: n. Transmission of data on a serial line, when
  accomplished by rapidly tweaking a single output bit at the
  appropriate times.  The technique is a simple
  loop with eight OUT and SHIFT instruction pairs for each byte.
  Input is more interesting.  And full duplex (doing input and output
  at the same time) is one way to separate the real hackers from the
  {wannabee}s.

  Bit bang was used on certain early models of Prime computers,
  presumably when UARTs were too expensive, and on archaic Z80 micros
  with a Zilog PIO but no SIO.  In an interesting instance of the
  {cycle of reincarnation}, this technique is now (1991) coming
  back into use on some RISC architectures because it consumes such
  an infinitesimal part of the processor that it actually makes sense
  not to have a UART.

bit bashing: n. (alt. `bit diddling' or {bit twiddling}) Term
  used to describe any of several kinds of low-level programming
  characterized by manipulation of {bit}, {flag}, {nybble},
  and other smaller-than-character-sized pieces of data; these
  include low-level device control, encryption algorithms, checksum
  and error-correcting codes, hash functions, some flavors of
  graphics programming (see {bitblt}), and assembler/compiler code
  generation.  May connote either tedium or a real technical
  challenge (more usually the former).  "The command decoding for
  the new tape driver looks pretty solid but the bit-bashing for the
  control registers still has bugs."  See also {bit bang},
  {mode bit}.

bit bucket: n. 1. The universal data sink (originally, the
  mythical receptacle used to catch bits when they fall off the end
  of a register during a shift instruction).  Discarded, lost, or
  destroyed data is said to have `gone to the bit bucket'.  On {{UNIX}},
  often used for {/dev/null}.  Sometimes amplified as `the Great
  Bit Bucket in the Sky'.  2. The place where all lost mail and news
  messages eventually go.  The selection is performed according to
  {Finagle's Law}; important mail is much more likely to end up in
  the bit bucket than junk mail, which has an almost 100% probability
  of getting delivered.  Routing to the bit bucket is automatically
  performed by mail-transfer agents, news systems, and the lower
  layers of the network.  3. The ideal location for all unwanted mail
  responses: "Flames about this article to the bit bucket."
  Such a request is guaranteed to overflow one's mailbox with flames.
  4. Excuse for all mail that has not been sent.  "I mailed you
  those figures last week; they must have ended in the bit bucket."
  Compare {black hole}.

  This term is used purely in jest.  It is based on the fanciful
  notion that bits are objects that are not destroyed but only
  misplaced.  This appears to have been a mutation of an earlier term
  `bit box', about which the same legend was current; old-time
  hackers also report that trainees used to be told that when the CPU
  stored bits into memory it was actually pulling them `out of the
  bit box'.  See also {chad box}.

  Another variant of this legend has it that, as a consequence of the
  `parity preservation law', the number of 1 bits that go to the bit
  bucket must equal the number of 0 bits.  Any imbalance results in
  bits filling up the bit bucket.  A qualified computer technician
  can empty a full bit bucket as part of scheduled maintenance.

bit decay: n. See {bit rot}.  People with a physics background
  tend to prefer this one for the analogy with particle decay.  See
  also {computron}, {quantum bogodynamics}.

bit rot: n. Also {bit decay}.  Hypothetical disease the existence
  of which has been deduced from the observation that unused programs
  or features will often stop working after sufficient time has
  passed, even if `nothing has changed'.  The theory explains that
  bits decay as if they were radioactive.  As time passes, the
  contents of a file or the code in a program will become
  increasingly garbled.

  There actually are physical processes that produce such effects
  (alpha particles generated by trace radionuclides in ceramic chip
  packages, for example, can change the contents of a computer memory
  unpredictably, and various kinds of subtle media failures can
  corrupt files in mass storage), but they are quite rare (and
  computers are built with error-detecting circuitry to compensate
  for them).  The notion long favored among hackers that cosmic
  rays are among the causes of such events turns out to be a myth;
  see the {cosmic rays} entry for details.

  The term {software rot} is almost synonymous.  Software rot is
  the effect, bit rot the notional cause.

bit twiddling: n. 1. (pejorative) An exercise in {tuning} in
  which incredible amounts of time and effort go to produce little
  noticeable improvement, often with the result that the code has
  become incomprehensible.  2. Aimless small modification to a
  program, esp. for some pointless goal.  3. Approx. syn. for {bit
  bashing}; esp. used for the act of frobbing the device control
  register of a peripheral in an attempt to get it back to a known
  state.

bit-paired keyboard: n. obs. (alt. `bit-shift keyboard') A
  non-standard keyboard layout that seems to have originated with
  the Teletype ASR-33 and remained common for several years on early
  computer equipment.  The ASR-33 was a mechanical device (see
  {EOU}), so the only way to generate the character codes from
  keystrokes was by some physical linkage.  The design of the ASR-33
  assigned each character key a basic pattern that could be modified
  by flipping bits if the SHIFT or the CTRL key was pressed.  In order
  to avoid making the thing more of a Rube Goldberg kluge than it
  already was, the design had to group characters that shared the
  same basic bit pattern on one key.

  Looking at the ASCII chart, we find:

    high  low bits
    bits  0000 0001 0010 0011 0100 0101 0110 0111 1000 1001
     010        !    "    #    $    %    &    '    (    )
     011   0    1    2    3    4    5    6    7    8    9

  This is why the characters !"#$%&'() appear where they do on a
  Teletype (thankfully, they didn't use shift-0 for space).  This was
  *not* the weirdest variant of the {QWERTY} layout widely
  seen, by the way; that prize should probably go to one of several
  (differing) arrangements on IBM's even clunkier 026 and 029 card
  punches.

  When electronic terminals became popular, in the early 1970s, there
  was no agreement in the industry over how the keyboards should be
  laid out.  Some vendors opted to emulate the Teletype keyboard,
  while others used the flexibility of electronic circuitry to make
  their product look like an office typewriter.  These alternatives
  became known as `bit-paired' and `typewriter-paired' keyboards.  To
  a hacker, the bit-paired keyboard seemed far more logical --- and
  because most hackers in those days had never learned to touch-type,
  there was little pressure from the pioneering users to adapt
  keyboards to the typewriter standard.

  The doom of the bit-paired keyboard was the large-scale
  introduction of the computer terminal into the normal office
  environment, where out-and-out technophobes were expected to use
  the equipment.  The `typewriter-paired' standard became universal,
  `bit-paired' hardware was quickly junked or relegated to dusty
  corners, and both terms passed into disuse.

bitblt: /bit'blit/ n. [from {BLT}, q.v.] 1. Any of a family
  of closely related algorithms for moving and copying rectangles of
  bits between main and display memory on a bit-mapped device, or
  between two areas of either main or display memory (the requirement
  to do the {Right Thing} in the case of overlapping source and
  destination rectangles is what makes BitBlt tricky).  2. Synonym
  for {blit} or {BLT}.  Both uses are borderline techspeak.

BITNET: /bit'net/ [acronym: Because It's Time NETwork] n.
  Everybody's least favorite piece of the network (see {network,
  the}).  The BITNET hosts are a collection of IBM dinosaurs and
  VAXen (the latter with lobotomized comm hardware) that communicate
  using 80-character {{EBCDIC}} card images (see {eighty-column
  mind}); thus, they tend to mangle the headers and text of
  third-party traffic from the rest of the ASCII/RFC-822 world with
  annoying regularity.  BITNET is also notorious as the apparent home
  of {BIFF}.

bits: n.pl. 1. Information.  Examples: "I need some bits about file
  formats."  ("I need to know about file formats.")  Compare {core
  dump}, sense 4.  2. Machine-readable representation of a document,
  specifically as contrasted with paper:  "I have only a photocopy
  of the Jargon File; does anyone know where I can get the bits?".
  See {softcopy}, {source of all good bits} See also {bit}.

bitty box: /bit'ee boks/ n. 1. A computer sufficiently small,
  primitive, or incapable as to cause a hacker acute claustrophobia
  at the thought of developing software for it.  Especially used of
  small, obsolescent, single-tasking-only personal machines such as
  the Atari 800, Osborne, Sinclair, VIC-20, TRS-80, or IBM PC.
  2. [Pejorative]  More generally, the opposite of `real computer'
  (see {Get a real computer!}).  See also {mess-dos},
  {toaster}, and {toy}.

bixie: /bik'see/ n. Variant {emoticon}s used on BIX (the Byte
  Information eXchange).  The {smiley} bixie is <@_@>, apparently
  intending to represent two cartoon eyes and a mouth.  A few others
  have been reported.

black art: n. A collection of arcane, unpublished, and (by
  implication) mostly ad-hoc techniques developed for a particular
  application or systems area (compare {black magic}).  VLSI design
  and compiler code optimization were (in their beginnings)
  considered classic examples of black art; as theory developed they
  became {deep magic}, and once standard textbooks had been written,
  became merely {heavy wizardry}.  The huge proliferation of formal
  and informal channels for spreading around new computer-related
  technologies during the last twenty years has made both the term
  `black art' and what it describes less common than formerly.  See
  also {voodoo programming}.

black hole: n. When a piece of email or netnews disappears
  mysteriously between its origin and destination sites (that is,
  without returning a {bounce message}) it is commonly said to have
  `fallen into a black hole'.  "I think there's a black hole at
  foovax!" conveys suspicion that site foovax has been dropping
  a lot of stuff on the floor lately (see {drop on the floor}).
  The implied metaphor of email as interstellar travel is interesting
  in itself.  Compare {bit bucket}.

black magic: n. A technique that works, though nobody really
  understands why.  More obscure than {voodoo programming}, which
  may be done by cookbook.  Compare also {black art}, {deep
  magic}, and {magic number} (sense 2).

blast: 1. vt.,n. Synonym for {BLT}, used esp. for large data
  sends over a network or comm line.  Opposite of {snarf}.  Usage:
  uncommon.  The variant `blat' has been reported.  2. vt.
  [HP/Apollo] Synonymous with {nuke} (sense 3).  Sometimes the
  message `Unable to kill all processes.  Blast them (y/n)?' would
  appear in the command window upon logout.

blat: n. 1. Syn. {blast}, sense 1.  2. See {thud}.

bletch: /blech/ [from Yiddish/German `brechen', to vomit, poss.
  via comic-strip exclamation `blech'] interj.  Term of disgust.
  Often used in "Ugh, bletch".  Compare {barf}.

bletcherous: /blech'*-r*s/ adj. Disgusting in design or function;
  esthetically unappealing.  This word is seldom used of people.
  "This keyboard is bletcherous!" (Perhaps the keys don't work very
  well, or are misplaced.)  See {losing}, {cretinous},
  {bagbiter}, {bogus}, and {random}.  The term {bletcherous}
  applies to the esthetics of the thing so described; similarly for
  {cretinous}.  By contrast, something that is `losing' or
  `bagbiting' may be failing to meet objective criteria.  See also
  {bogus} and {random}, which have richer and wider shades of
  meaning than any of the above.

blinkenlights: /blink'*n-li:tz/ n. Front-panel diagnostic lights
  on a computer, esp. a {dinosaur}.  Derives from the last word of
  the famous
  blackletter-Gothic
  sign in mangled pseudo-German that once graced about half the
  computer rooms in the English-speaking world.  One version ran in
  its entirety as follows:

                  ACHTUNG!  ALLES LOOKENSPEEPERS!
       Das computermachine ist nicht fuer gefingerpoken und mittengrabben.
       Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken
       mit spitzensparken.  Ist nicht fuer gewerken bei das dumpkopfen.
       Das rubbernecken sichtseeren keepen das cotten-pickenen hans in das
       pockets muss; relaxen und watchen das blinkenlichten.


  This silliness dates back at least as far as 1959 at Stanford
  University and had already gone international by the early 1960s,
  when it was reported at London University's ATLAS computing site.
  There are several variants of it in circulation, some of which
  actually do end with the word `blinkenlights'.

  In an amusing example of turnabout-is-fair-play, German hackers
  have developed their own versions of the blinkenlights poster in
  fractured English, one of which is reproduced here:

                              ATTENTION
       This room is fullfilled mit special electronische equippment.
       Fingergrabbing and pressing the cnoeppkes from the computers is
       allowed for die experts only!  So all the "lefthanders" stay away
       and do not disturben the brainstorming von here working
       intelligencies.  Otherwise you will be out thrown and kicked
       anderswhere!  Also: please keep still and only watchen astaunished
       the blinkenlights.

  See also {geef}.

blit: /blit/ vt. 1. To copy a large array of bits from one part
  of a computer's memory to another part, particularly when the
  memory is being used to determine what is shown on a display
  screen.  "The storage allocator picks through the table and copies
  the good parts up into high memory, and then blits it all back
  down again."  See {bitblt}, {BLT}, {dd}, {cat},
  {blast}, {snarf}.  More generally, to perform some operation
  (such as toggling) on a large array of bits while moving them.
  2. All-capitalized as `BLIT': an early experimental bit-mapped
  terminal designed by Rob Pike at Bell Labs, later commercialized as
  the AT&T 5620.  (The folk etymology from `Bell Labs Intelligent
  Terminal' is incorrect.)

blitter: /blit'r/ n. A special-purpose chip or hardware system
  built to perform {blit} operations, esp. used for fast
  implementation of bit-mapped graphics.  The Commodore Amiga and a
  few other micros have these, but in 1991 the trend is away from
  them (however, see {cycle of reincarnation}).  Syn. {raster
  blaster}.

blivet: /bliv'*t/ [allegedly from a World War II military term
  meaning "ten pounds of manure in a five-pound bag"] n. 1. An
  intractable problem.  2. A crucial piece of hardware that can't be
  fixed or replaced if it breaks.  3. A tool that has been hacked
  over by so many incompetent programmers that it has become an
  unmaintainable tissue of hacks.  4. An out-of-control but
  unkillable development effort.  5. An embarrassing bug that pops up
  during a customer demo.

  This term has other meanings in other technical cultures; among
  experimental physicists and hardware engineers of various kinds it
  seems to mean any random object of unknown purpose (similar to
  hackish use of {frob}).  It has also been used to describe an
  amusing trick-the-eye drawing resembling a three-pronged fork that
  appears to depict a three-dimensional object until one realizes that
  the parts fit together in an impossible way.

block: [from process scheduling terminology in OS theory] 1. vi.
  To delay or sit idle while waiting for something.  "We're blocking
  until everyone gets here."  Compare {busy-wait}.  2. `block
  on' vt. To block, waiting for (something).  "Lunch is blocked on
  Phil's arrival."

block transfer computations: n. From the television series
  "Dr. Who", in which it referred to computations so fiendishly
  subtle and complex that they could not be performed by machines.
  Used to refer to any task that should be expressible as an
  algorithm in theory, but isn't.

blow an EPROM: /bloh *n ee'prom/ v. (alt. `blast an EPROM',
  `burn an EPROM') To program a read-only memory, e.g. for use
  with an embedded system.  This term arises because the programming
  process for the Programmable Read-Only Memories (PROMs) that
  preceded present-day Erasable Programmable Read-Only Memories
  (EPROMs) involved intentionally blowing tiny electrical fuses on
  the chip.  Thus, one was said to `blow' (or `blast') a PROM, and
  the terminology carried over even though the write process on
  EPROMs is nondestructive.

blow away: vt. To remove (files and directories) from permanent
  storage, generally by accident.  "He reformatted the wrong
  partition and blew away last night's netnews."  Oppose {nuke}.

blow out: vi. Of software, to fail spectacularly; almost as serious
  as {crash and burn}.  See {blow past}, {blow up}.

blow past: vt. To {blow out} despite a safeguard.  "The server blew
  past the 5K reserve buffer."

blow up: vi. 1. [scientific computation] To become unstable.  Suggests
  that the computation is diverging so rapidly that it will soon
  overflow or at least go {nonlinear}.  2.  Syn. {blow out}.

BLT: /B-L-T/, /bl*t/ or (rarely) /belt/ n.,vt. Synonym for
  {blit}.  This is the original form of {blit} and the ancestor
  of {bitblt}.  It referred to any large bit-field copy or move
  operation (one resource-intensive memory-shuffling operation done
  on pre-paged versions of ITS, WAITS, and TOPS-10 was sardonically
  referred to as `The Big BLT').  The jargon usage has outlasted the
  {PDP-10} BLock Transfer instruction from which {BLT} derives;
  nowadays, the assembler mnemonic {BLT} almost always means
  `Branch if Less Than zero'.

Blue Book: n. 1. Informal name for one of the three standard
  references on the page-layout and graphics-control language
  PostScript (`PostScript Language Tutorial and Cookbook', Adobe
  Systems, Addison-Wesley 1985, QA76.73.P67P68, ISBN 0-201-10179-3);
  the other two official guides are known as the {Green Book} and
  {Red Book}.  2. Informal name for one of the three standard
  references on Smalltalk: `Smalltalk-80: The Language and its
  Implementation', David Robson, Addison-Wesley 1983, QA76.8.S635G64,
  ISBN 0-201-11371-63 (this is also associated with green and red
  books).  3. Any of the 1988 standards issued by the CCITT's
  ninth plenary assembly.  Until now, they have changed color each review
  cycle (1984 was {Red Book}, 1992 would be {Green Book}); however,
  it is rumored that this convention is going to be dropped before 1992.
  These include, among other things, the X.400 email spec and
  the Group 1 through 4 fax standards.  See also {{book titles}}.

Blue Glue: [IBM] n. IBM's SNA (Systems Network Architecture), an
  incredibly {losing} and {bletcherous} communications protocol
  widely favored at commercial shops that don't know any better.  The
  official IBM definition is "that which binds blue boxes
  together."  See {fear and loathing}.  It may not be irrelevant
  that {Blue Glue} is the trade name of a 3M product that is
  commonly used to hold down the carpet squares to the removable
  panel floors common in {dinosaur pens}.  A correspondent at
  U. Minn. reports that the CS department there has about 80 bottles
  of the stuff hanging about, so they often refer to any messy work
  to be done as `using the blue glue'.

blue goo: n. Term for `police' {nanobot}s intended to prevent
  {gray goo}, denature hazardous waste, destroy pollution, put
  ozone back into the stratosphere, prevent halitosis, and promote
  truth, justice, and the American way, etc.  See
  {{nanotechnology}}.

BNF: /B-N-F/ n. 1. [techspeak] Acronym for `Backus-Naur Form', a
  metasyntactic notation used to specify the syntax of programming
  languages, command sets, and the like.  Widely used for language
  descriptions but seldom documented anywhere, so that it must
  usually be learned by osmosis from other hackers.  Consider this
  BNF for a U.S. postal address:

     <postal-address> ::= <name-part> <street-address> <zip-part>

     <personal-part> ::= <name> | <initial> "."

     <name-part> ::= <personal-part> <last-name> [<jr-part>] <EOL>
                   | <personal-part> <name-part>

     <street-address> ::= [<apt>] <house-num> <street-name> <EOL>

     <zip-part> ::= <town-name> "," <state-code> <ZIP-code> <EOL>

  This translates into English as: "A postal-address consists of a
  name-part, followed by a street-address part, followed by a
  zip-code part.  A personal-part consists of either a first name or
  an initial followed by a dot.  A name-part consists of either: a
  personal-part followed by a last name followed by an optional
  `jr-part' (Jr., Sr., or dynastic number) and end-of-line, or a
  personal part followed by a name part (this rule illustrates the
  use of recursion in BNFs, covering the case of people who use
  multiple first and middle names and/or initials).  A street address
  consists of an optional apartment specifier, followed by a street
  number, followed by a street name.  A zip-part consists of a
  town-name, followed by a comma, followed by a state code, followed
  by a ZIP-code followed by an end-of-line."  Note that many things
  (such as the format of a personal-part, apartment specifier, or
  ZIP-code) are left unspecified.  These are presumed to be obvious
  from context or detailed somewhere nearby.  See also {parse}.
  2. The term is also used loosely for any number of variants and
  extensions, possibly containing some or all of the {regexp}
  wildcards such as `*' or `+'.  In fact the example above
  isn't the pure form invented for the Algol-60 report; it uses
  `[]', which was introduced a few years later in IBM's PL/I
  definition but is now universally recognized.  3. In
  {{science-fiction fandom}}, BNF means `Big-Name Fan'
  (someone famous or notorious).  Years ago a fan started handing out
  black-on-green BNF buttons at SF conventions; this confused the
  hacker contingent terribly.

boa: [IBM] n. Any one of the fat cables that lurk under the floor
  in a {dinosaur pen}.  Possibly so called because they display a
  ferocious life of their own when you try to lay them straight and
  flat after they have been coiled for some time.  It is rumored
  within IBM that channel cables for the 370 are limited to 200 feet
  because beyond that length the boas get dangerous --- and it is
  worth noting that one of the major cable makers uses the trademark
  `Anaconda'.

board: n. 1. In-context synonym for {bboard}; sometimes used
  even for USENET newsgroups.  2. An electronic circuit board
  (compare {card}).

boat anchor: n. 1. Like {doorstop} but more severe; implies that
  the offending hardware is irreversibly dead or useless.  "That was
  a working motherboard once.  One lightning strike later, instant
  boat anchor!"  2. A person who just takes up space.

bogo-sort: /boh`goh-sort'/ n. (var. `stupid-sort') The
  archetypical perversely awful algorithm (as opposed to {bubble
  sort}, which is merely the generic *bad* algorithm).
  Bogo-sort is equivalent to repeatedly throwing a deck of cards in
  the air, picking them up at random, and then testing whether they
  are in order.  It serves as a sort of canonical example of
  awfulness.  Looking at a program and seeing a dumb algorithm, one
  might say "Oh, I see, this program uses bogo-sort."  Compare
  {bogus}, {brute force}.

bogometer: /boh-gom'-*t-er/ n. See {bogosity}.  Compare the
  `wankometer' described in the {wank} entry; see also
  {bogus}.

bogon: /boh'gon/ [by analogy with proton/electron/neutron, but
  doubtless reinforced after 1980 by the similarity to Douglas
  Adams's `Vogons'; see the Bibliography] n. 1. The elementary particle of
  bogosity (see {quantum bogodynamics}).  For instance, "the
  Ethernet is emitting bogons again" means that it is broken or
  acting in an erratic or bogus fashion.  2. A query packet sent from
  a TCP/IP domain resolver to a root server, having the reply bit set
  instead of the query bit.  3. Any bogus or incorrectly formed
  packet sent on a network.  4. By synecdoche, used to refer to any
  bogus thing, as in "I'd like to go to lunch with you but I've got
  to go to the weekly staff bogon".  5. A person who is bogus or who
  says bogus things.  This was historically the original usage, but
  has been overtaken by its derivative senses 1--4.  See
  also {bogosity}, {bogus}; compare {psyton}.

bogon filter: /boh'gon fil'tr/ n. Any device, software or hardware,
  that limits or suppresses the flow and/or emission of bogons.
  "Engineering hacked a bogon filter between the Cray and
  the VAXen, and now we're getting fewer dropped packets."  See
  also {bogosity}, {bogus}.

bogon flux: /boh'gon fluhks/ n. A measure of a supposed field of
  {bogosity} emitted by a speaker, measured by a {bogometer};
  as a speaker starts to wander into increasing bogosity a listener
  might say "Warning, warning, bogon flux is rising".  See
  {quantum bogodynamics}.

bogosity: /boh-go's*-tee/ n. 1. The degree to which something is
  {bogus}.  At CMU, bogosity is measured with a {bogometer}; in
  a seminar, when a speaker says something bogus, a listener might
  raise his hand and say "My bogometer just triggered".  More
  extremely, "You just pinned my bogometer"  means you just said
  or did something so outrageously bogus that it is off the scale,
  pinning the bogometer needle at the highest possible reading (one
  might also say "You just redlined my bogometer").  The
  agreed-upon unit of bogosity is the microLenat /mi:k`roh-len'*t/
  (uL).
  The consensus is that this is the largest unit practical
  for everyday use.  2. The potential field generated by a {bogon
  flux}; see {quantum bogodynamics}.  See also {bogon flux},
  {bogon filter}, {bogus}.

  Historical note: The microLenat was invented as a attack against
  noted computer scientist Doug Lenat by a {tenured graduate
  student}.  Doug had failed the student on an important exam for
  giving only "AI is bogus" as his answer to the questions.  The
  slur is generally considered unmerited, but it has become a running
  gag nevertheless.  Some of Doug's friends argue that *of
  course* a microLenat is bogus, since it is only one millionth of a
  Lenat.  Others have suggested that the unit should be redesignated
  after the grad student, as the microReid.

bogotify: /boh-go't*-fi:/ vt. To make or become bogus.  A
  program that has been changed so many times as to become completely
  disorganized has become bogotified.  If you tighten a nut too hard
  and strip the threads on the bolt, the bolt has become bogotified
  and you had better not use it any more.  This coinage led to the
  notional `autobogotiphobia' defined as `the fear of becoming
  bogotified'; but is not clear that the latter has ever been
  `live' jargon rather than a self-conscious joke in jargon about
  jargon.  See also {bogosity}, {bogus}.

bogue out: /bohg owt/ vi. To become bogus, suddenly and
  unexpectedly.  "His talk was relatively sane until somebody asked
  him a trick question; then he bogued out and did nothing but
  {flame} afterwards."  See also {bogosity}, {bogus}.

bogus: adj. 1. Non-functional.  "Your patches are bogus."
  2. Useless.  "OPCON is a bogus program."  3. False.  "Your
  arguments are bogus."  4. Incorrect.  "That algorithm is bogus."
  5. Unbelievable.  "You claim to have solved the halting problem
  for Turing Machines?  That's totally bogus."  6. Silly.  "Stop
  writing those bogus sagas."

  Astrology is bogus.  So is a bolt that is obviously about to break.
  So is someone who makes blatantly false claims to have solved a
  scientific problem.  (This word seems to have some, but not all, of
  the connotations of {random} --- mostly the negative ones.)

  It is claimed that `bogus' was originally used in the hackish sense
  at Princeton in the late 1960s.  It was spread to CMU and Yale by
  Michael Shamos, a migratory Princeton alumnus.  A glossary of bogus
  words was compiled at Yale when the word was first popularized (see
  {autobogotiphobia} under {bogotify}). The word spread into
  hackerdom from CMU and MIT.  By the early 1980s it was also
  current in something like the hackish sense in West Coast teen
  slang, and it had gone mainstream by 1985.  A correspondent from
  Cambridge reports, by contrast, that these uses of `bogus' grate on
  British nerves; in Britain the word means, rather specifically,
  `counterfeit', as in "a bogus 10-pound note".

Bohr bug: /bohr buhg/ [from quantum physics] n. A repeatable
  {bug}; one that manifests reliably under a possibly unknown but
  well-defined set of conditions.  Antonym of {heisenbug}; see also
  {mandelbug}.

boink: /boynk/ [USENET: ascribed there to the TV series
  "Cheers" and "Moonlighting"] 1. To have sex with;
  compare {bounce}, sense 3. (This is mainstream slang.) In
  Commonwealth hackish the variant `bonk' is more common.  2. After
  the original Peter Korn `Boinkon' {USENET} parties, used for
  almost any net social gathering, e.g., Miniboink, a small boink
  held by Nancy Gillett in 1988; Minniboink, a Boinkcon in Minnesota
  in 1989; Humpdayboinks, Wednesday get-togethers held in the San
  Francisco Bay Area.  Compare {@-party}.  3. Var of `bonk';
  see {bonk/oif}.

bomb: 1. v. General synonym for {crash} (sense 1) except that it
  is not used as a noun; esp. used of software or OS failures.
  "Don't run Empire with less than 32K stack, it'll bomb."
  2. n.,v. Atari ST and Macintosh equivalents of a UNIX `panic' or
  Amiga {guru} (sense 2), where icons of little black-powder bombs
  or mushroom clouds are displayed, indicating that the system has died.
  On the Mac, this may be accompanied by a decimal (or occasionally
  hexadecimal) number indicating what went wrong, similar to the
  Amiga GURU MEDITATION number (see {guru}).  {{MS-DOS}} machines
  tend to get {locked up} in this situation.

bondage-and-discipline language: A language (such as Pascal, Ada,
  APL, or Prolog) that, though ostensibly general-purpose, is designed
  so as to enforce an author's theory of `right programming' even
  though said theory is demonstrably inadequate for systems hacking
  or even vanilla general-purpose programming.  Often abbreviated
  `B&D'; thus, one may speak of things "having the B&D nature".
  See {{Pascal}}; oppose {languages of choice}.

bonk/oif: /bonk/, /oyf/ interj. In the {MUD} community, it has
  become traditional to express pique or censure by `bonking' the
  offending person.  There is a convention that one should
  acknowledge a bonk by saying `oif!' and a myth to the effect that
  failing to do so upsets the cosmic bonk/oif balance, causing much
  trouble in the universe.  Some MUDs have implemented special
  commands for bonking and oifing.  See also {talk mode},
  {posing}.

book titles:: There is a tradition in hackerdom of informally
  tagging important textbooks and standards documents with the
  dominant color of their covers or with some other conspicuous
  feature of the cover.  Many of these are described in this lexicon
  under their own entries. See {Aluminum Book}, {Blue Book},
  {Cinderella Book}, {Devil Book}, {Dragon Book}, {Green
  Book}, {Orange Book}, {Pink-Shirt Book}, {Purple Book},
  {Red Book}, {Silver Book}, {White Book}, {Wizard Book},
  {Yellow Book}, and {bible}.

boot: [techspeak; from `by one's bootstraps'] v.,n. To load and
  initialize the operating system on a machine.  This usage is no
  longer jargon (having passed into techspeak) but has given rise to
  some derivatives that are still jargon.

  The derivative `reboot' implies that the machine hasn't been
  down for long, or that the boot is a {bounce} intended to clear
  some state of {wedgitude}.  This is sometimes used of human
  thought processes, as in the following exchange: "You've lost
  me." "OK, reboot.  Here's the theory...."

  This term is also found in the variants `cold boot' (from
  power-off condition) and `warm boot' (with the CPU and all
  devices already powered up, as after a hardware reset or software
  crash).

  Another variant: `soft boot', reinitialization of only part of a
  system, under control of other software still running: "If
  you're running the {mess-dos} emulator, control-alt-insert will
  cause a soft-boot of the emulator, while leaving the rest of the
  system running."

  Opposed to this there is `hard boot', which connotes hostility
  towards or frustration with the machine being booted:  "I'll have
  to hard-boot this losing Sun." "I recommend booting it hard."

  Historical note: this term derives from `bootstrap loader', a short
  program that was read in from cards or paper tape, or toggled in
  from the front panel switches.  This program was always very short
  (great efforts were expended on making it short in order to
  minimize the labor and chance of error involved in toggling it in),
  but was just smart enough to read in a slightly more complex
  program (usually from a card or paper tape reader), to which it
  handed control; this program in turn was smart enough to read the
  application or operating system from a magnetic tape drive or disk
  drive.  Thus, in successive steps, the computer `pulled itself up
  by its bootstraps' to a useful operating state.  Nowadays the
  bootstrap is usually found in ROM or EPROM, and reads the first
  stage in from a fixed location on the disk, called the `boot
  block'.  When this program gains control, it is powerful enough to
  load the actual OS and hand control over to it.

bottom-up implementation: n. Hackish opposite of the techspeak term
  `top-down design'.  It is now received wisdom in most
  programming cultures that it is best to design from higher levels
  of abstraction down to lower, specifying sequences of action in
  increasing detail until you get to actual code.  Hackers often find
  (especially in exploratory designs that cannot be closely
  specified in advance) that it works best to *build* things in
  the opposite order, by writing and testing a clean set of primitive
  operations and then knitting them together.

bounce: v. 1. [perhaps from the image of a thrown ball bouncing
  off a wall] An electronic mail message that is undeliverable and
  returns an error notification to the sender is said to `bounce'.
  See also {bounce message}.  2. [Stanford] To play volleyball.
  At the now-demolished {D. C. Power Lab} building used by the
  Stanford AI Lab in the 1970s, there was a volleyball court on the
  front lawn.  From 5 P.M. to 7 P.M. was the scheduled
  maintenance time for the computer, so every afternoon at 5 the
  computer would become unavailable, and over the intercom a voice
  would cry, "Now hear this: bounce, bounce!" followed by Brian
  McCune loudly bouncing a volleyball on the floor outside the
  offices of known volleyballers.  3. To engage in sexual
  intercourse; prob. from the expression `bouncing the mattress',
  but influenced by Piglet's psychosexually loaded "Bounce on me
  too, Tigger!" from the "Winnie-the-Pooh" books.  Compare
  {boink}.  4. To casually reboot a system in order to clear up a
  transient problem.  Reported primarily among {VMS} users.
  5. [IBM] To {power cycle} a peripheral in order to reset it.

bounce message: [UNIX] n. Notification message returned to sender by
  a site unable to relay {email} to the intended {{Internet address}}
  recipient or the next link in a {bang path} (see {bounce}).
  Reasons might include a nonexistent or misspelled username or a
  {down} relay site.  Bounce messages can themselves fail, with
  occasionally ugly results; see {sorcerer's apprentice mode}.
  The term `bounce mail' is also common.

box: n. 1. A computer; esp. in the construction `foo box'
  where foo is some functional qualifier, like `graphics', or
  the name of an OS (thus, `UNIX box', `MS-DOS box', etc.)  "We
  preprocess the data on UNIX boxes before handing it up to the
  mainframe."  2. [within IBM] Without qualification but within an
  SNA-using site, this refers specifically to an IBM front-end
  processor or FEP /F-E-P/.  An FEP is a small computer necessary
  to enable an IBM {mainframe} to communicate beyond the limits of
  the {dinosaur pen}.  Typically used in expressions like the cry
  that goes up when an SNA network goes down: "Looks like the
  {box} has fallen over." (See {fall over}.) See also
  {IBM}, {fear and loathing}, {fepped out}, {Blue
  Glue}.

boxed comments: n. Comments (explanatory notes attached to program
  instructions) that occupy several lines by themselves; so called
  because in assembler and C code they are often surrounded by a box
  in a style something like this:

    /*************************************************
     *
     * This is a boxed comment in C style
     *
     *************************************************/

  Common variants of this style omit the asterisks in column 2 or add
  a matching row of asterisks closing the right side of the box.  The
  sparest variant omits all but the comment delimiters themselves;
  the `box' is implied.  Oppose {winged comments}.

boxen: /bok'sn/ [by analogy with {VAXen}] pl.n. Fanciful
  plural of {box} often encountered in the phrase `UNIX boxen',
  used to describe commodity {{UNIX}} hardware.  The connotation is
  that any two UNIX boxen are interchangeable.

boxology: /bok-sol'*-jee/ n. Syn. {ASCII art}.  This term
  implies a more restricted domain, that of box-and-arrow drawings.
  "His report has a lot of boxology in it."  Compare
  {macrology}.

bozotic: /boh-zoh'tik/ or /boh-zo'tik/ [from the name of a TV
  clown even more losing than Ronald McDonald] adj. Resembling or
  having the quality of a bozo; that is, clownish, ludicrously wrong,
  unintentionally humorous.  Compare {wonky}, {demented}.  Note
  that the noun `bozo' occurs in slang, but the mainstream
  adjectival form would be `bozo-like' or (in New England)
  `bozoish'.

BQS: /B-Q-S/ adj. Syn. {Berkeley Quality Software}.

brain dump: n. The act of telling someone everything one knows
  about a particular topic or project.  Typically used when someone
  is going to let a new party maintain a piece of code.  Conceptually
  analogous to an operating system {core dump} in that it saves a
  lot of useful {state} before an exit.  "You'll have to
  give me a brain dump on FOOBAR before you start your new job at
  HackerCorp."  See {core dump} (sense 4).  At Sun, this is also
  known as `TOI' (transfer of information).

brain-damaged: 1. [generalization of `Honeywell Brain Damage'
  (HBD), a theoretical disease invented to explain certain utter
  cretinisms in Honeywell {{Multics}}] adj. Obviously wrong;
  {cretinous}; {demented}.  There is an implication that the
  person responsible must have suffered brain damage, because he
  should have known better.  Calling something brain-damaged is
  really bad; it also implies it is unusable, and that its failure to
  work is due to poor design rather than some accident.  "Only six
  monocase characters per file name?  Now *that's*
  brain-damaged!"  2. [esp. in the Mac world] May refer to free
  demonstration software that has been deliberately crippled in some
  way so as not to compete with the commercial product it is
  intended to sell.  Syn.  {crippleware}.

brain-dead: adj. Brain-damaged in the extreme.  It tends to imply
  terminal design failure rather than malfunction or simple
  stupidity.  "This comm program doesn't know how to send a break
  --- how brain-dead!"

braino: /bray'no/ n. Syn. for {thinko}.

branch to Fishkill: [IBM: from the location of one of the
  corporation's facilities] n. Any unexpected jump in a program that
  produces catastrophic or just plain weird results.  See {jump
  off into never-never land}, {hyperspace}.

brand brand brand: n. Humorous catch-phrase from {BartleMUD}s, in
  which players were described carrying a list of objects, the most
  common of which would usually be a brand.  Often used as a joke in
  {talk mode} as in "Fred the wizard is here, carrying brand ruby
  brand brand brand kettle broadsword flamethrower".  A brand is a
  torch, of course; one burns up a lot of those exploring dungeons.
  Prob. influenced by the famous Monty Python "Spam" skit.

break: 1. vt. To cause to be broken (in any sense).  "Your latest
  patch to the editor broke the paragraph commands."  2. v.  (of a
  program) To stop temporarily, so that it may debugged.  The place
  where it stops is a `breakpoint'.  3. [techspeak] vi. To send an
  RS-232 break (125 msec of line high) over a serial comm line.
  4. [UNIX] vi. To strike whatever key currently causes the tty
  driver to send SIGINT to the current process.  Normally, break
  (sense 3) or delete does this.  5. `break break' may be said to
  interrupt a conversation (this is an example of verb doubling).

breath-of-life packet: [XEROX PARC] n. An Ethernet packet that
  contained bootstrap (see {boot}) code, periodically sent out
  from a working computer to infuse the `breath of life' into any
  computer on the network that had happened to crash.  The machines
  had hardware or firmware that would wait for such a packet after a
  catastrophic error.

breedle: n. See {feep}.

bring X to its knees: v. To present a machine, operating system,
  piece of software, or algorithm with a load so extreme or
  {pathological} that it grinds to a halt.  "To bring a MicroVAX
  to its knees, try twenty users running {vi} --- or four running
  {EMACS}."  Compare {hog}.

brittle: adj. Said of software that is functional but easily broken
  by changes in operating environment or configuration, or by any
  minor tweak to the software itself.  Also, any system that
  responds inappropriately and disastrously to expected external
  stimuli; e.g., a file system that is usually totally scrambled by a
  power failure is said to be brittle.  This term is often used to
  describe the results of a research effort that were never intended
  to be robust, but it can be applied to commercially developed
  software, which displays the quality far more often than it ought
  to.  Oppose {robust}.

broadcast storm: n. An incorrect packet broadcast on a network that
  causes most hosts to respond all at once, typically with wrong
  answers that start the process over again.  See {network
  meltdown}.

broken: adj. 1. Not working properly (of programs).  2. Behaving
  strangely; especially (when used of people) exhibiting extreme
  depression.

broken arrow: [IBM] n. The error code displayed on line 25 of a
  3270 terminal (or a PC emulating a 3270) for various kinds of
  protocol violations and "unexpected" error conditions (including
  connection to a {down} computer).  On a PC, simulated with
  `->/_', with the two center characters overstruck. In true
  {luser} fashion, the original documentation of these codes
  (visible on every 3270 terminal, and necessary for debugging
  network problems) was confined to an IBM customer engineering
  manual.

  Note: to appreciate this term fully, it helps to know that `broken
  arrow' is also military jargon for an accident involving nuclear
  weapons....

broket: /broh'k*t/ or /broh'ket`/ [by analogy with `bracket': a
  `broken bracket'] n. Either of the characters `<' and `>',
  when used as paired enclosing delimiters.  This word
  originated as a contraction of the phrase `broken bracket', that
  is, a bracket that is bent in the middle.  (At MIT, and apparently
  in the {Real World} as well, these are usually called {angle
  brackets}.)

Brooks's Law: prov. "Adding manpower to a late software project
  makes it later" --- a result of the fact that the advantage from
  splitting work among N programmers is O(N) (that is,
  proportional to N), but the complexity and communications
  cost associated with coordinating and then merging their work
  is O(N^2) (that is, proportional to the square of N).
  The quote is from Fred Brooks, a manager of IBM's OS/360 project
  and author of `The Mythical Man-Month' (Addison-Wesley, 1975,
  ISBN 0-201-00650-2), an excellent early book on software
  engineering.  The myth in question has been most tersely expressed
  as "Programmer time is fungible" and Brooks established
  conclusively that it is not.  Hackers have never forgotten his
  advice; too often, {management} does.  See also
  {creationism}, {second-system effect}.

BRS: /B-R-S/ n. Syn. {Big Red Switch}.  This abbreviation is
  fairly common on-line.

brute force: adj. Describes a primitive programming style, one in
  which the programmer relies on the computer's processing power
  instead of using his or her own intelligence to simplify the problem,
  often ignoring problems of scale and applying na"ive methods suited
  to small problems directly to large ones.

  The {canonical} example of a brute-force algorithm is associated
  with the `traveling salesman problem' (TSP), a classical NP-hard
  problem: Suppose a person is in, say, Boston, and wishes to drive
  to N other cities.  In what order should he or she visit
  them in order to minimize the distance travelled?  The brute-force
  method is to simply generate all possible routes and compare the
  distances; while guaranteed to work and simple to implement, this
  algorithm is clearly very stupid in that it considers even
  obviously absurd routes (like going from Boston to Houston via San
  Francisco and New York, in that order).  For very small N it
  works well, but it rapidly becomes absurdly inefficient when
  N increases (for N = 15, there are already
  1,307,674,368,000 possible routes to consider, and for
  N = 1000 --- well, see {bignum}).  See
  also {NP-}.

  A more simple-minded example of brute-force programming is finding
  the smallest number in a large list by first using an existing
  program to sort the list in ascending order, and then picking the
  first number off the front.

  Whether brute-force programming should be considered stupid or not
  depends on the context; if the problem isn't too big, the extra CPU
  time spent on a brute-force solution may cost less than the
  programmer time it would take to develop a more `intelligent'
  algorithm.  Alternatively, a more intelligent algorithm may imply
  more long-term complexity cost and bug-chasing than are justified
  by the speed improvement.

  Ken Thompson, co-inventor of UNIX, is reported to have uttered the
  epigram "When in doubt, use brute force".  He probably intended
  this as a {ha ha only serious}, but the original UNIX kernel's
  preference for simple, robust, and portable algorithms over
  {brittle} `smart' ones does seem to have been a significant
  factor in the success of that OS.  Like so many other tradeoffs in
  software design, the choice between brute force and complex,
  finely-tuned cleverness is often a difficult one that requires both
  engineering savvy and delicate esthetic judgment.

brute force and ignorance: n. A popular design technique at many
  software houses --- {brute force} coding unrelieved by any
  knowledge of how problems have been previously solved in elegant
  ways.  Dogmatic adherence to design methodologies tends to
  encourage it.  Characteristic of early {larval stage}
  programming; unfortunately, many never outgrow it.  Often
  abbreviated BFI: "Gak, they used a bubble sort!  That's strictly
  from BFI."  Compare {bogosity}.

BSD: /B-S-D/ n. [acronym for `Berkeley System Distribution'] a
  family of {{UNIX}} versions for the DEC {VAX} and PDP-11
  developed by Bill Joy and others at {Berzerkeley} starting around
  1980, incorporating paged virtual memory, TCP/IP networking
  enhancements, and many other features.  The BSD versions (4.1, 4.2,
  and 4.3) and the commercial versions derived from them (SunOS, ULTRIX,
  and Mt. Xinu) held the technical lead in the UNIX world until
  AT&T's successful standardization efforts after about 1986, and are
  still widely popular.  See {{UNIX}}, {USG UNIX}.

bubble sort: n. Techspeak for a particular sorting technique in
  which pairs of adjacent values in the list to be sorted are
  compared and interchanged if they are out of order; thus, list
  entries `bubble upward' in the list until they bump into one with a
  lower sort value.  Because it is not very good relative to other
  methods and is the one typically stumbled on by {na"ive} and
  untutored programmers, hackers consider it the {canonical}
  example of a na"ive algorithm.  The canonical example of a really
  *bad* algorithm is {bogo-sort}.  A bubble sort might be used
  out of ignorance, but any use of bogo-sort could issue only from
  brain damage or willful perversity.

bucky bits: /buh'kee bits/ n. 1. obs. The bits produced by the
  CONTROL and META shift keys on a SAIL keyboard, resulting in a
  9-bit keyboard character set.  The MIT AI TV (Knight) keyboards
  extended this with TOP and separate left and right CONTROL and META
  keys, resulting in a 12-bit character set; later, LISP Machines
  added such keys as SUPER, HYPER, and GREEK (see {space-cadet
  keyboard}).  2. By extension, bits associated with `extra' shift
  keys on any keyboard, e.g., the ALT on an IBM PC or command and
  option keys on a Macintosh.

  It is rumored that `bucky bits' were named for Buckminster Fuller
  during a period when he was consulting at Stanford.  Actually,
  `Bucky' was Niklaus Wirth's nickname when *he* was at
  Stanford; he first suggested the idea of an EDIT key to set the
  8th bit of an otherwise 7-bit ASCII character.  This was used in a
  number of editors written at Stanford or in its environs (TV-EDIT
  and NLS being the best-known).  The term spread to MIT and CMU
  early and is now in general use.  See {double bucky},
  {quadruple bucky}.

buffer overflow: n. What happens when you try to stuff more data
  into a buffer (holding area) than it can handle.  This may be due
  to a mismatch in the processing rates of the producing and
  consuming processes (see {overrun}), or because the buffer is
  simply too small to hold all the data that must accumulate before a
  piece of it can be processed. For example, in a text-processing
  tool that {crunch}es a line at a time, a short line buffer can
  result in {lossage} as input from a long line overflows the
  buffer and trashes data beyond it.  Good defensive programming
  would check for overflow on each character and stop accepting data
  when the buffer is full up.  The term is used of and by humans in a
  metaphorical sense. "What time did I agree to meet you?  My buffer
  must have overflowed."  Or "If I answer that phone my buffer is
  going to overflow."  See also {spam}, {overrun screw}.

bug: n. An unwanted and unintended property of a program or hardware,
  esp. one that causes it to malfunction.  Antonym of {feature}.
  Examples: "There's a bug in the editor: it writes things out
  backwards."  "The system crashed because of a hardware bug."
  "Fred is a winner, but he has a few bugs"  (i.e., Fred is a good
  guy, but he has a few personality problems).

  Historical note: Some have said this term came from telephone
  company usage, in which "bugs in a telephone cable" were blamed
  for noisy lines, but this appears to be an incorrect folk
  etymology.  Admiral Grace Hopper (an early computing pioneer better
  known for inventing {COBOL}) liked to tell a story in which a
  technician solved a persistent {glitch} in the Harvard Mark II
  machine by pulling an actual insect out from between the
  contacts of one of its relays, and she subsequently promulgated
  {bug} in its hackish sense as a joke about the incident (though,
  as she was careful to admit, she was not there when it happened).
  For many years the logbook associated with the incident and the
  actual bug in question (a moth) sat in a display case at the Naval
  Surface Warfare Center.  The entire story, with a picture of the
  logbook and the moth taped into it, is recorded in the `Annals of
  the History of Computing', Vol. 3, No. 3 (July 1981), pp. 285--286.

  The text of the log entry (from September 9, 1945), reads "1545
  Relay #70 Panel F (moth) in relay.  First actual case of bug being
  found".  This wording seems to establish that the term was already in use
  at the time in its current specific sense.  Indeed, the use of
  `bug' to mean an industrial defect was already established in
  Thomas Edison's time, and `bug' in the sense of an disruptive event
  goes back to Shakespeare!  In the first edition of Samuel Johnson's
  dictionary one meaning of `bug' is "A frightful object; a walking
  spectre"; this is traced to `bugbear', a Welsh term for a variety
  of mythological monster which (to complete the circle) has recently
  been reintroduced into the popular lexicon through fantasy
  role-playing games.

  In any case, in jargon the word almost never refers to insects.
  Here is a plausible conversation that never actually happened:

  "There is a bug in this ant farm!"

  "What do you mean?  I don't see any ants in it."

  "That's the bug."

  [There has been a widespread myth that the original bug was moved
  to the Smithsonian, and an earlier version of this entry so
  asserted.  A correspondent who thought to check discovered that the
  bug was not there.  While investigating this, your editor
  discovered that the NSWC still had the bug, but had unsuccessfully
  tried to get the Smithsonian to accept it --- and that the present
  curator of the History of American Technology Museum didn't
  know this and agreed that it would make a worthwhile exhibit.
  Thus, the process of investigating the original-computer-bug bug
  may have fixed it in an entirely unexpected way, by making the myth
  true!  --- ESR]

bug-compatible: adj. Said of a design or revision that has been
  badly compromised by a requirement to be compatible with
  {fossil}s or {misfeature}s in other programs or (esp.)
  previous releases of itself. "MS-DOS 2.0 used \ as a path
  separator to be bug-compatible with some cretin's choice of / as an
  option character in 1.0."

bug-for-bug compatible: n. Same as {bug-compatible}, with the
  additional implication that much tedious effort went into ensuring
  that each (known) bug was replicated.

buglix: /buhg'liks/ n. Pejorative term referring to DEC's ULTRIX
  operating system in its earlier *severely* buggy versions.
  Still used to describe ULTRIX, but without venom.  Compare
  {HP-SUX}.

bulletproof: adj. Used of an algorithm or implementation considered
  extremely {robust}; lossage-resistant; capable of correctly
  recovering from any imaginable exception condition.  This is a rare
  and valued quality.  Syn. {armor-plated}.

bum: 1. vt. To make highly efficient, either in time or space,
  often at the expense of clarity.  "I managed to bum three more
  instructions out of that code."  "I spent half the night bumming
  the interrupt code."  2. To squeeze out excess; to remove
  something in order to improve whatever it was removed from (without
  changing function; this distinguishes the process from a
  {featurectomy}).  3. n. A small change to an algorithm, program,
  or hardware device to make it more efficient.  "This hardware bum
  makes the jump instruction faster."  Usage: now uncommon, largely
  superseded by v. {tune} (and n. {tweak}, {hack}), though
  none of these exactly capture sense 2.  All these uses are rare in
  Commonwealth hackish, because in the parent dialects of English
  `bum' is a rude synonym for `buttocks'.

bump: vt. Synonym for increment.  Has the same meaning as
  C's ++ operator.  Used esp. of counter variables, pointers, and index
  dummies in `for', `while', and `do-while' loops.

burble: [from Lewis Carroll's "Jabberwocky"] v. Like {flame},
  but connotes that the source is truly clueless and ineffectual
  (mere flamers can be competent).  A term of deep contempt.
  "There's some guy on the phone burbling about how he got a DISK
  FULL error and it's all our comm software's fault."

buried treasure: n. A surprising piece of code found in some
  program.  While usually not wrong, it tends to vary from {crufty}
  to {bletcherous}, and has lain undiscovered only because it was
  functionally correct, however horrible it is.  Used sarcastically,
  because what is found is anything *but* treasure.  Buried
  treasure almost always needs to be dug up and removed.  "I just
  found that the scheduler sorts its queue using {bubble sort}!
  Buried treasure!"

burn-in period: n. 1. A factory test designed to catch systems
  with {marginal} components before they get out the door; the
  theory is that burn-in will protect customers by outwaiting the
  steepest part of the {bathtub curve} (see {infant
  mortality}).  2. A period of indeterminate length in which a person
  using a computer is so intensely involved in his project that he
  forgets basic needs such as food, drink, sleep, etc.  Warning:
  Excessive burn-in can lead to burn-out.  See {hack mode},
  {larval stage}.

burst page: n. Syn. {banner}, sense 1.

busy-wait: vi. Used of human behavior, conveys that the subject is
  busy waiting for someone or something, intends to move instantly as
  soon as it shows up, and thus cannot do anything else at the
  moment.  "Can't talk now, I'm busy-waiting till Bill gets off the
  phone."

  Technically, `busy-wait' means to wait on an event by
  {spin}ning through a tight or timed-delay loop that polls for
  the event on each pass, as opposed to setting up an interrupt
  handler and continuing execution on another part of the task.  This
  is a wasteful technique, best avoided on time-sharing systems where
  a busy-waiting program may {hog} the processor.

buzz: vi. 1. Of a program, to run with no indication of progress
  and perhaps without guarantee of ever finishing; esp. said of
  programs thought to be executing tight loops of code.  A program
  that is buzzing appears to be {catatonic}, but you never get out
  of catatonia, while a buzzing loop may eventually end of its own
  accord.  "The program buzzes for about 10 seconds trying to sort
  all the names into order."  See {spin}; see also {grovel}.
  2. [ETA Systems] To test a wire or printed circuit trace for
  continuity by applying an AC rather than DC signal.  Some wire
  faults will pass DC tests but fail a buzz test.  3. To process an
  array or list in sequence, doing the same thing to each element.
  "This loop buzzes through the tz array looking for a terminator
  type."

BWQ: /B-W-Q/ [IBM: acronym, `Buzz Word Quotient'] The
  percentage of buzzwords in a speech or documents.  Usually roughly
  proportional to {bogosity}.  See {TLA}.

by hand: adv. Said of an operation (especially a repetitive,
  trivial, and/or tedious one) that ought to be performed
  automatically by the computer, but which a hacker instead has to
  step tediously through.  "My mailer doesn't have a command to
  include the text of the message I'm replying to, so I have to do it
  by hand."  This does not necessarily mean the speaker has to
  retype a copy of the message; it might refer to, say, dropping into
  a {subshell} from the mailer, making a copy of one's mailbox file,
  reading that into an editor, locating the top and bottom of the
  message in question, deleting the rest of the file, inserting `>'
  characters on each line, writing the file, leaving the editor,
  returning to the mailer, reading the file in, and later remembering
  to delete the file.  Compare {eyeball search}.

byte:: /bi:t/ [techspeak] n. A unit of memory or data equal to
  the amount used to represent one character; on modern architectures
  this is usually 8 bits, but may be 9 on 36-bit machines.  Some
  older architectures used `byte' for quantities of 6 or 7 bits, and
  the PDP-10 supported `bytes' that were actually bitfields of
  1 to 36 bits!  These usages are now obsolete, and even 9-bit bytes
  have become rare in the general trend toward power-of-2 word sizes.

  Historical note: The term originated in 1956 during the early
  design phase for the IBM Stretch computer; originally it was
  described as 1 to 6 bits (typical I/O equipment of the period
  used 6-bit chunks of information).  The move to an 8-bit byte
  happened in late 1956, and this size was later adopted and
  promulgated as a standard by the System/360.  The term `byte' was
  coined by mutating the word `bite' so it would not be accidentally
  misspelled as {bit}.  See also {nybble}.

bytesexual: /bi:t`sek'shu-*l/ adj. Said of hardware, denotes
  willingness to compute or pass data in either {big-endian} or
  {little-endian} format (depending, presumably, on a {mode bit}
  somewhere).  See also {NUXI problem}.

= C =
=====

C: n. 1. The third letter of the English alphabet.  2. ASCII
  1000011.  3. The name of a programming language designed by
  Dennis Ritchie during the early 1970s and immediately used to
  reimplement {{UNIX}}.  So called because many features derived
  from an earlier compiler named `B' in commemoration of
  *its* parent, BCPL; before Bjarne Stroustrup settled the
  question by designing C++, there was a humorous debate over whether
  C's successor should be named `D' or `P'.  C became immensely
  popular outside Bell Labs after about 1980 and is now the dominant
  language in systems and microcomputer applications programming.
  See also {languages of choice}, {indent style}.

  C is often described, with a mixture of fondness and disdain
  varying according to the speaker, as "a language that combines
  all the elegance and power of assembly language with all the
  readability and maintainability of assembly language".

calculator: [Cambridge] n. Syn. for {bitty box}.

can: vt. To abort a job on a time-sharing system.  Used esp. when the
  person doing the deed is an operator, as in "canned from the
  {{console}}".  Frequently used in an imperative sense, as in "Can
  that print job, the LPT just popped a sprocket!"  Synonymous with
  {gun}.  It is said that the ASCII character with mnemonic CAN
  (0011000) was used as a kill-job character on some early OSes.

canonical: [historically, `according to religious law'] adj. The
  usual or standard state or manner of something.  This word has a
  somewhat more technical meaning in mathematics.  Two formulas such
  as 9 + x and x + 9 are said to be equivalent because
  they mean the same thing, but the second one is in `canonical
  form' because it is written in the usual way, with the highest
  power of x first.  Usually there are fixed rules you can use
  to decide whether something is in canonical form.  The jargon
  meaning, a relaxation of the technical meaning, acquired its
  present loading in computer-science culture largely through its
  prominence in Alonzo Church's work in computation theory and
  mathematical logic (see {Knights of the Lambda Calculus}).
  Compare {vanilla}.

  This word has an interesting history.  Non-technical academics do
  not use the adjective `canonical' in any of the senses defined
  above with any regularity; they do however use the nouns `canon' and
  `canonicity' (not *canonicalness or *canonicality). The `canon' of
  a given author is the complete body of authentic works by that
  author (this usage is familiar to Sherlock Holmes fans as well as
  to literary scholars).  `*The* canon' is the body of works in
  a given field (e.g., works of literature, or of art, or of music)
  deemed worthwhile for students to study and for scholars to
  investigate.

  These non-techspeak academic usages derive ultimately from the
  historical meaning, specifically the classification of the books of
  the Bible into two groups by Christian theologians.  The
  `canonical' books were the ones widely accepted as Holy
  Scripture and held to be of primary authority.  The
  `deuterocanonical' books (literally `secondarily canonical';
  also known as the `Apochrypha') were held to be of lesser
  authority --- indeed they have been held in such low esteem that to
  this day they are omitted from most Protestant bibles.

  Hackers invest this term with a playfulness that makes an ironic
  contrast with its historical meaning.  A true story: One Bob
  Sjoberg, new at the MIT AI Lab, expressed some annoyance at the use
  of jargon.  Over his loud objections, GLS and RMS made a point of
  using it as much as possible in his presence, and eventually it
  began to sink in.  Finally, in one conversation, he used the word
  `canonical' in jargon-like fashion without thinking.  Steele:
  "Aha!  We've finally got you talking jargon too!"  Stallman:
  "What did he say?"  Steele: "Bob just used `canonical' in the
  canonical way."

  Of course, canonicality depends on context, but it is implicitly
  defined as the way *hackers* normally expect things to be.
  Thus, a hacker may claim with a straight face that `according to
  religious law' is *not* the canonical meaning of `canonical'.

card: n. 1. An electronic printed-circuit board (see also {tall
  card}, {short card}.  2. obs. Syn. {{punched card}}.

card walloper: n. An EDP programmer who grinds out batch programs
  that do stupid things like print people's paychecks.  Compare
  {code grinder}.  See also {{punched card}}, {eighty-column
  mind}.

careware: /keir'weir/ n. {Shareware} for which either the
  author suggests that some payment be made to a nominated charity
  or a levy directed to charity is included on top of the
  distribution charge.  Syn. {charityware}; compare
  {crippleware}, sense 2.

cargo cult programming: n. A style of (incompetent) programming
  dominated by ritual inclusion of code or program structures that
  serve no real purpose.  A cargo cult programmer will usually
  explain the extra code as a way of working around some bug
  encountered in the past, but usually neither the bug nor the reason
  the code apparently avoided the bug was ever fully understood
  (compare {shotgun debugging}, {voodoo programming}).

  The term `cargo cult' is a reference to aboriginal religions that
  grew up in the South Pacific after World War II.  The practices of
  these cults center on building elaborate mockups of airplanes and
  military style landing strips in the hope of bringing the return of
  the god-like airplanes that brought such marvelous cargo during the
  war.  Hackish usage probably derives from Richard Feynman's
  characterization of certain practices as "cargo cult science" in
  his book `Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman' (W. W. Norton
  & Co, New York 1985, ISBN 0-393-01921-7).

case and paste: [from `cut and paste'] n. 1. The addition of a new
  {feature} to an existing system by selecting the code from an
  existing feature and pasting it in with minor changes.  Common in
  telephony circles because most operations in a telephone switch are
  selected using `case' statements.  Leads to {software bloat}.

  In some circles of EMACS users this is called `programming by
  Meta-W', because Meta-W is the EMACS command for copying a block of
  text to a kill buffer in preparation to pasting it in elsewhere.
  The term is condescending, implying that the programmer is acting
  mindlessly rather than thinking carefully about what is required to
  integrate the code for two similar cases.

casters-up mode: [IBM] n. Yet another synonym for `broken' or
  `down'.

casting the runes: n. What a {guru} does when you ask him or her
  to run a particular program and type at it because it never works
  for anyone else; esp. used when nobody can ever see what the guru
  is doing different from what J. Random Luser does.  Compare
  {incantation}, {runes}, {examining the entrails}; also see
  the AI koan about Tom Knight in appendix A.

cat: [from `catenate' via {{UNIX}} `cat(1)'] vt.
  1. [techspeak] To spew an entire file to the screen or some other
  output sink without pause.  2. By extension, to dump large amounts
  of data at an unprepared target or with no intention of browsing it
  carefully.  Usage: considered silly.  Rare outside UNIX sites.  See
  also {dd}, {BLT}.

  Among UNIX fans, `cat(1)' is considered an excellent example
  of user-interface design, because it outputs the file contents
  without such verbosity as spacing or headers between the files, and
  because it does not require the files to consist of lines of text,
  but works with any sort of data.

  Among UNIX-haters, `cat(1)' is considered the {canonical}
  example of *bad* user-interface design.  This because it is more
  often used to {blast} a file to standard output than to
  concatenate two files.  The name `cat' for the former
  operation is just as unintuitive as, say, LISP's {cdr}.

  Of such oppositions are {holy wars} made....

catatonic: adj. Describes a condition of suspended animation in
  which something is so {wedged} or {hung} that it makes no
  response.  If you are typing on a terminal and suddenly the
  computer doesn't even echo the letters back to the screen as you
  type, let alone do what you're asking it to do, then the computer
  is suffering from catatonia (possibly because it has crashed).
  "There I was in the middle of a winning game of {nethack} and it
  went catatonic on me!  Aaargh!" Compare {buzz}.

cdr: /ku'dr/ or /kuh'dr/ [from LISP] vt. To skip past the
  first item from a list of things (generalized from the LISP
  operation on binary tree structures, which returns a list
  consisting of all but the first element of its argument).  In the
  form `cdr down', to trace down a list of elements:  "Shall we
  cdr down the agenda?"  Usage: silly.  See also {loop through}.

  Historical note: The instruction format of the IBM 7090 that hosted
  the original LISP implementation featured two 15-bit fields called
  the `address' and `decrement' parts.  The term `cdr' was originally
  `Contents of Decrement part of Register'.  Similarly, `car' stood
  for `Contents of Address part of Register'.

  The cdr and car operations have since become bases for
  formation of compound metaphors in non-LISP contexts.  GLS recalls,
  for example, a programming project in which strings were
  represented as linked lists; the get-character and skip-character
  operations were of course called CHAR and CHDR.

chad: /chad/ n. 1. The perforated edge strips on printer paper, after
  they have been separated from the printed portion.  Also called
  {selvage} and {perf}.  2. obs. The confetti-like paper bits punched
  out of cards or paper tape; this was also called `chaff', `computer
  confetti', and `keypunch droppings'.

  Historical note: One correspondent believes `chad' (sense 2)
  derives from the Chadless keypunch (named for its inventor), which
  cut little u-shaped tabs in the card to make a hole when the tab
  folded back, rather than punching out a circle/rectangle; it was
  clear that if the Chadless keypunch didn't make them, then the
  stuff that other keypunches made had to be `chad'.

chad box: n. {Iron Age} card punches contained boxes inside them,
  about the size of a lunchbox (or in some models a large
  wastebasket), that held the {chad} (sense 2).  You had to open
  the covers of the card punch periodically and empty the chad box.
  The {bit bucket} was notionally the equivalent device in the CPU
  enclosure, which was typically across the room in another great
  gray-and-blue box.

chain: [orig. from BASIC's `CHAIN' statement] vi. To hand off
  execution to a child or successor without going through the
  {OS} command interpreter that invoked it.  The state of the
  parent program is lost and there is no returning to it.  Though
  this facility used to be common on memory-limited micros and is
  still widely supported for backward compatibility, the jargon usage
  is semi-obsolescent; in particular, most UNIX programmers will
  think of this as an {exec}.  Oppose the more modern {subshell}.

char: /keir/ or /char/; rarely, /kar/ n. Shorthand for
  `character'.  Esp. used by C programmers, as `char' is
  C's typename for character data.

charityware: /char'it-ee-weir`/ n. Syn. {careware}.

chase pointers: 1. vi. To go through multiple levels of
  indirection, as in traversing a linked list or graph structure.
  Used esp. by programmers in C, where explicit pointers are a very
  common data type.  This is techspeak, but it remains jargon when
  used of human networks.  "I'm chasing pointers.  Bob said you
  could tell me who to talk to about...." See {dangling
  pointer} and {snap}.  2. [Cambridge] `pointer chase' or
  `pointer hunt': The process of going through a dump
  (interactively or on a large piece of paper printed with hex
  {runes}) following dynamic data-structures.  Used only in a
  debugging context.

chemist: [Cambridge] n. Someone who wastes computer time on
  {number-crunching} when you'd far rather the machine were doing
  something more productive, such as working out anagrams of your
  name or printing Snoopy calendars or running {life} patterns.
  May or may not refer to someone who actually studies chemistry.

Chernobyl chicken: n. See {laser chicken}.

Chernobyl packet: /cher-noh'b*l pak'*t/ n. A network packet that
  induces {network meltdown} (the result of a {broadcast storm}),
  in memory of the 1987 nuclear accident at Chernobyl in the Ukraine.
  The typical case of this is an IP Ethernet datagram that passes
  through a gateway with both source and destination Ether and IP
  address set as the respective broadcast addresses for the
  subnetworks being gated between.  Compare {Christmas tree
  packet}.

chicken head: [Commodore] n. The Commodore Business Machines logo,
  which strongly resembles a poultry part.  Rendered in ASCII as
  `C='.  With the arguable exception of the Amiga (see {amoeba}),
  Commodore's machines are notoriously crocky little {bitty box}es
  (see also {PETSCII}).  Thus, this usage may owe something to
  Philip K.  Dick's novel `Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?'
  (the basis for the movie `Blade Runner'), in which a
  `chickenhead' is a mutant with below-average intelligence.

chiclet keyboard: n. A keyboard with small rectangular or
  lozenge-shaped rubber or plastic keys that look like pieces of
  chewing gum.  (Chiclets is the brand name of a variety of chewing
  gum that does in fact resemble the keys of chiclet keyboards.)
  Used esp. to describe the original IBM PCjr keyboard.  Vendors
  unanimously liked these because they were cheap, and a lot of early
  portable and laptop products got launched using them.  Customers
  rejected the idea with almost equal unanimity, and chiclets are not
  often seen on anything larger than a digital watch any more.

chine nual: /sheen'yu-*l/ [MIT] n.,obs. The Lisp Machine Manual, so
  called because the title was wrapped around the cover so only those
  letters showed on the front.

Chinese Army technique: n. Syn. {Mongolian Hordes technique}.

choke: v. To reject input, often ungracefully.  "Nuls make System
  V's `lpr(1)' choke."  "I tried building an {EMACS} binary to
  use {X}, but `cpp(1)' choked on all those `#define's."
  See {barf}, {gag}, {vi}.

chomp: vi. To {lose}; specifically, to chew on something of
  which more was bitten off than one can.  Probably related to
  gnashing of teeth.  See {bagbiter}.  A hand gesture commonly
  accompanies this.  To perform it, hold the four fingers
  together and place the thumb against their tips.  Now open and
  close your hand rapidly to suggest a biting action (much like what
  Pac-Man does in the classic video game, though this pantomime seems
  to predate that).  The gesture alone means `chomp chomp' (see
  Verb Doubling in the "Jargon Construction" section of the
  Prependices).  The hand may be pointed at the object of complaint,
  and for real emphasis you can use both hands at once.  Doing this
  to a person is equivalent to saying "You chomper!"  If you point
  the gesture at yourself, it is a humble but humorous admission of
  some failure.  You might do this if someone told you that a program
  you had written had failed in some surprising way and you felt dumb
  for not having anticipated it.

chomper: n. Someone or something that is chomping; a loser.  See
  {loser}, {bagbiter}, {chomp}.

Christmas tree: n. A kind of RS-232 line tester or breakout box
  featuring rows of blinking red and green LEDs suggestive of
  Christmas lights.

Christmas tree packet: n. A packet with every single option set for
  whatever protocol is in use.  See {kamikaze packet}, {Chernobyl
  packet}.  (The term doubtless derives from a fanciful image of each
  little option bit being represented by a different-colored light
  bulb, all turned on.)

chrome: [from automotive slang via wargaming] n. Showy features
  added to attract users but contributing little or nothing to
  the power of a system.  "The 3D icons in Motif are just chrome,
  but they certainly are *pretty* chrome!"  Distinguished from
  {bells and whistles} by the fact that the latter are usually
  added to gratify developers' own desires for featurefulness.
  Often used as a term of contempt.

chug: vi. To run slowly; to {grind} or {grovel}.  "The disk is
  chugging like crazy."

Church of the SubGenius: n. A mutant offshoot of
  {Discordianism} launched in 1981 as a spoof of fundamentalist
  Christianity by the `Reverend' Ivan Stang, a brilliant satirist
  with a gift for promotion.  Popular among hackers as a rich source
  of bizarre imagery and references such as "Bob" the divine
  drilling-equipment salesman, the Benevolent Space Xists, and the
  Stark Fist of Removal.  Much SubGenius theory is concerned with the
  acquisition of the mystical substance or quality of
  `slack'.

Cinderella Book: [CMU] n. `Introduction to Automata Theory,
  Languages, and Computation', by John Hopcroft and Jeffrey Ullman,
  (Addison-Wesley, 1979).  So called because the cover depicts a girl
  (putatively Cinderella) sitting in front of a Rube Goldberg device
  and holding a rope coming out of it.  The back cover depicts the
  girl with the device in shambles after she has pulled on the rope.
  See also {{book titles}}.

CI$: // n. Hackerism for `CIS', CompuServe Information Service.
  The dollar sign refers to CompuServe's rather steep line charges.  Often
  used in {sig block}s just before a CompuServe address.  Syn.
  {Compu$erve}.

Classic C: /klas'ik C/ [a play on `Coke Classic'] n. The
  C programming language as defined in the first edition of {K&R},
  with some small additions.  It is also known as `K&R C'.  The name
  came into use while C was being standardized by the ANSI X3J11
  committee.  Also `C Classic'.  This is sometimes applied
  elsewhere: thus, `X Classic', where X = Star Trek (referring to the
  original TV series) or X = PC (referring to IBM's ISA-bus machines
  as opposed to the PS/2 series).  This construction is especially
  used of product series in which the newer versions are considered
  serious losers relative to the older ones.

clean: 1. adj. Used of hardware or software designs, implies
  `elegance in the small', that is, a design or implementation that
  may not hold any surprises but does things in a way that is
  reasonably intuitive and relatively easy to comprehend from the
  outside.  The antonym is `grungy' or {crufty}.  2. v. To remove
  unneeded or undesired files in a effort to reduce clutter:  "I'm
  cleaning up my account." "I cleaned up the garbage and now have
  100 Meg free on that partition."

CLM: /C-L-M/ [Sun: `Career Limiting Move'] 1. n. An action
  endangering one's future prospects of getting plum projects and
  raises, and possibly one's job:  "His Halloween costume was a
  parody of his manager.  He won the prize for `best CLM'."
  2. adj.  Denotes extreme severity of a bug, discovered by a
  customer and obviously missed earlier because of poor testing:
  "That's a CLM bug!"

clobber: vt. To overwrite, usually unintentionally: "I walked off
  the end of the array and clobbered the stack."  Compare {mung},
  {scribble}, {trash}, and {smash the stack}.

clocks: n. Processor logic cycles, so called because each
  generally corresponds to one clock pulse in the processor's timing.
  The relative execution times of instructions on a machine are
  usually discussed in clocks rather than absolute fractions of a
  second; one good reason for this is that clock speeds for various
  models of the machine may increase as technology improves, and it
  is usually the relative times one is interested in when discussing
  the instruction set.  Compare {cycle}.

clone: n. 1. An exact duplicate: "Our product is a clone of
  their product."  Implies a legal reimplementation from
  documentation or by reverse-engineering.  Also connotes lower
  price.  2. A shoddy, spurious copy: "Their product is a
  clone of our product."  3. A blatant ripoff, most likely violating
  copyright, patent, or trade secret protections: "Your
  product is a clone of my product."  This use implies legal
  action is pending.  4. A `PC clone'; a PC-BUS/ISA or
  EISA-compatible 80x86-based microcomputer (this use is sometimes
  spelled `klone' or `PClone').  These invariably have much
  more bang for the buck than the IBM archetypes they resemble.
  5. In the construction `UNIX clone': An OS designed to deliver
  a UNIX-lookalike environment without UNIX license fees, or with
  additional `mission-critical' features such as support for
  real-time programming.  6. v. To make an exact copy of something.
  "Let me clone that" might mean "I want to borrow that paper so I
  can make a photocopy" or "Let me get a copy of that file before
  you {mung} it".

clover key: [Mac users] n. See {command key}.

clustergeeking: /kluh'st*r-gee`king/ [CMU] n.  Spending more time
  at a computer cluster doing CS homework than most people spend
  breathing.

COBOL: /koh'bol/ [COmmon Business-Oriented Language] n.
  (Synonymous with {evil}.)  A weak, verbose, and flabby language
  used by {card walloper}s to do boring mindless things on
  {dinosaur} mainframes.  Hackers believe all COBOL programmers
  are {suit}s or {code grinder}s, and no self-respecting hacker
  will ever admit to having learned the language.  Its very name is
  seldom uttered without ritual expressions of disgust or horror.
  See also {fear and loathing}, {software rot}.

COBOL fingers: /koh'bol fing'grz/ n. Reported from Sweden, a
  (hypothetical) disease one might get from coding in COBOL.  The
  language requires code verbose beyond all reason; thus it is
  alleged that programming too much in COBOL causes one's fingers to
  wear down to stubs by the endless typing.  "I refuse to type in
  all that source code again; it would give me COBOL fingers!"

code grinder: n. 1. A {suit}-wearing minion of the sort hired in
  legion strength by banks and insurance companies to implement
  payroll packages in RPG and other such unspeakable horrors.  In his
  native habitat, the code grinder often removes the suit jacket to
  reveal an underplumage consisting of button-down shirt (starch
  optional) and a tie.  In times of dire stress, the sleeves (if
  long) may be rolled up and the tie loosened about half an inch.  It
  seldom helps.  The {code grinder}'s milieu is about as far from
  hackerdom as you can get and still touch a computer; the term
  connotes pity.  See {Real World}, {suit}.  2. Used of or to a
  hacker, a really serious slur on the person's creative ability;
  connotes a design style characterized by primitive technique,
  rule-boundedness, {brute force}, and utter lack of imagination.
  Compare {card walloper}; contrast {hacker}, {real
  programmer}.

code police: [by analogy with George Orwell's `thought police'] n.
  A mythical team of Gestapo-like storm troopers that might burst
  into one's office and arrest one for violating programming style
  rules.  May be used either seriously, to underline a claim that a
  particular style violation is dangerous, or ironically, to suggest
  that the practice under discussion is condemned mainly by
  anal-retentive {weenie}s.  "Dike out that goto or the code
  police will get you!"  The ironic usage is perhaps more common.

codewalker: n. A program component that traverses other programs for
  a living.  Compilers have codewalkers in their front ends; so do
  cross-reference generators and some database front ends.  Other
  utility programs that try to do too much with source code may turn
  into codewalkers.  As in "This new `vgrind' feature would require a
  codewalker to implement."

coefficient of X: n. Hackish speech makes rather heavy use of
  pseudo-mathematical metaphors.  Four particularly important ones
  involve the terms `coefficient', `factor', `index', and
  `quotient'.  They are often loosely applied to things you
  cannot really be quantitative about, but there are subtle
  distinctions among them that convey information about the way the
  speaker mentally models whatever he or she is describing.

  `Foo factor' and `foo quotient' tend to describe something for
  which the issue is one of presence or absence.  The canonical
  example is {fudge factor}.  It's not important how much you're
  fudging; the term simply acknowledges that some fudging is needed.
  You might talk of liking a movie for its silliness factor.
  Quotient tends to imply that the property is a ratio of two opposing
  factors: "I would have won except for my luck quotient."  This
  could also be "I would have won except for the luck factor", but
  using *quotient* emphasizes that it was bad luck overpowering
  good luck (or someone else's good luck overpowering your own).

  `Foo index' and `coefficient of foo' both tend to imply
  that foo is, if not strictly measurable, at least something that
  can be larger or smaller.  Thus, you might refer to a paper or
  person as having a `high bogosity index', whereas you would be less
  likely to speak of a `high bogosity factor'.  `Foo index' suggests
  that foo is a condensation of many quantities, as in the mundane
  cost-of-living index; `coefficient of foo' suggests that foo is a
  fundamental quantity, as in a coefficient of friction.  The choice
  between these terms is often one of personal preference; e.g., some
  people might feel that bogosity is a fundamental attribute and thus
  say `coefficient of bogosity', whereas others might feel it is a
  combination of factors and thus say `bogosity index'.

cokebottle: /kohk'bot-l/ n. Any very unusual character,
  particularly one you can't type because it it isn't on your
  keyboard.  MIT people used to complain about the
  `control-meta-cokebottle' commands at SAIL, and SAIL people
  complained right back about the `altmode-altmode-cokebottle'
  commands at MIT.  After the demise of the {space-cadet
  keyboard}, `cokebottle' faded away as serious usage, but was
  often invoked humorously to describe an (unspecified) weird or
  non-intuitive keystroke command.  It may be due for a second
  inning, however.  The OSF/Motif window manager, `mwm(1)', has
  a reserved keystroke for switching to the default set of
  keybindings and behavior.  This keystroke is (believe it or not)
  `control-meta-bang' (see {bang}).  Since the exclamation point
  looks a lot like an upside down Coke bottle, Motif hackers have
  begun referring to this keystroke as `cokebottle'.  See also
  {quadruple bucky}.

cold boot: n. See {boot}.

COME FROM: n. A semi-mythical language construct dual to the `go
  to'; `COME FROM' <label> would cause the referenced label to act as a
  sort of trapdoor, so that if the program ever reached it control
  would quietly and {automagically} be transferred to the statement
  following the `COME FROM'.  `COME FROM' was first proposed in a
  {Datamation} article of December 1973 (reprinted in the April 1984
  issue of `Communications of the ACM') that parodied the
  then-raging `structured programming' {holy wars} (see
  {considered harmful}).  Mythically, some variants are the
  `assigned COME FROM' and the `computed COME FROM'
  (parodying some nasty control constructs in FORTRAN and some
  extended BASICs).  Of course, multi-tasking (or non-determinism)
  could be implemented by having more than one `COME FROM' statement
  coming from the same label.

  In some ways the FORTRAN `DO' looks like a `COME FROM'
  statement.  After the terminating statement number/`CONTINUE'
  is reached, control continues at the statement following the DO.
  Some generous FORTRANs would allow arbitrary statements (other than
  `CONTINUE') for the statement, leading to examples like:

          DO 10 I=1,LIMIT
    C imagine many lines of code here, leaving the
    C original DO statement lost in the spaghetti...
          WRITE(6,10) I,FROB(I)
     10   FORMAT(1X,I5,G10.4)

  in which the trapdoor is just after the statement labeled 10.
  (This is particularly surprising because the label doesn't appear
  to have anything to do with the flow of control at all!)

  While sufficiently astonishing to the unsuspecting reader, this
  form of `COME FROM' statement isn't completely general.  After all,
  control will eventually pass to the following statement.  The
  implementation of the general form was left to Univac FORTRAN,
  ca. 1975.  The statement `AT 100' would perform a `COME
  FROM 100'.  It was intended strictly as a debugging aid, with dire
  consequences promised to anyone so deranged as to use it in
  production code.  More horrible things had already been perpetrated
  in production languages, however; doubters need only contemplate
  the `ALTER' verb in {COBOL}.

  `COME FROM' was supported under its own name for the first
  time 15 years later, in C-INTERCAL (see {INTERCAL},
  {retrocomputing}); knowledgeable observers are still reeling
  from the shock.

comm mode: /kom mohd/ [ITS: from the feature supporting on-line
  chat; the term may spelled with one or two m's] Syn. for {talk
  mode}.

command key: [Mac users] n. The Macintosh key with the cloverleaf
  graphic on its keytop; sometimes referred to as `flower',
  `pretzel', `clover', `propeller', `beanie' (an apparent
  reference to the major feature of a propeller beanie), or
  {splat}.  The Mac's equivalent of an {ALT} key.  The
  proliferation of terms for this creature may illustrate one subtle
  peril of iconic interfaces.

comment out: vt. To surround a section of code with comment
  delimiters or to prefix every line in the section with a comment
  marker; this prevents it from being compiled or interpreted.  Often
  done when the code is redundant or obsolete, but you want to leave
  it in the source to make the intent of the active code clearer;
  also when the code in that section is broken and you want to bypass
  it in order to debug some other part of the code.  Compare
  {condition out}, usually the preferred technique in languages
  (such as {C}) that make it possible.

Commonwealth Hackish:: n. Hacker jargon as spoken outside
  the U.S., esp. in the British Commonwealth.  It is reported that
  Commonwealth speakers are more likely to pronounce truncations like
  `char' and `soc', etc., as spelled (/char/, /sok/), as
  opposed to American /keir/ and /sohsh/.  Dots in {newsgroup}
  names tend to be pronounced more often (so soc.wibble is /sok dot
  wib'l/ rather than /sohsh wib'l/).  The prefix {meta} may be
  pronounced /mee't*/; similarly, Greek letter beta is often
  /bee't*/, zeta is often /zee't*/, and so forth.  Preferred
  metasyntactic variables include `eek', `ook',
  `frodo', and `bilbo'; `wibble', `wobble', and
  in emergencies `wubble'; `banana', `wombat',
  `frog', {fish}, and so on and on (see {foo}, sense 4).

  Alternatives to verb doubling include suffixes `-o-rama',
  `frenzy' (as in feeding frenzy), and `city' (examples: "barf
  city!" "hack-o-rama!" "core dump frenzy!").  Finally, note
  that the American terms `parens', `brackets', and `braces' for (),
  [], and {} are uncommon; Commonwealth hackish prefers
  `brackets', `square brackets', and `curly brackets'.  Also, the
  use of `pling' for {bang} is common outside the United States.

  See also {attoparsec}, {calculator}, {chemist}, {console
  jockey}, {fish}, {go-faster stripes}, {grunge}, {hakspek},
  {heavy metal}, {leaky heap}, {lord high fixer}, {noddy},
  {psychedelicware}, {plingnet}, {raster blaster}, {seggie},
  {terminal junkie}, {tick-list features}, {weeble},
  {weasel}, {YABA}, and notes or definitions under {Bad Thing},
  {barf}, {bogus}, {bum}, {chase pointers}, {cosmic rays},
  {crippleware}, {crunch}, {dodgy}, {gonk}, {hamster},
  {hardwarily}, {mess-dos}, {nybble}, {proglet}, {root},
  {SEX}, {tweak}, and {xyzzy}.

compact: adj. Of a design, describes the valuable property that it
  can all be apprehended at once in one's head.  This generally means
  the thing created from the design can be used with greater facility
  and fewer errors than an equivalent tool that is not compact.
  Compactness does not imply triviality or lack of power; for
  example, C is compact and FORTRAN is not, but C is more powerful
  than FORTRAN.  Designs become non-compact through accreting
  {feature}s and {cruft} that don't merge cleanly into the
  overall design scheme (thus, some fans of {Classic C} maintain
  that ANSI C is no longer compact).

compiler jock: n. See {jock} (sense 2).

compress: [UNIX] vt. When used without a qualifier, generally
  refers to {crunch}ing of a file using a particular
  C implementation of Lempel-Ziv compression by James A. Woods et al. and
  widely circulated via {USENET}.  Use of {crunch} itself in this
  sense is rare among UNIX hackers.

Compu$erve: n. See {CI$}.

computer confetti: n. Syn. {chad}.  Though this term is common,
  this use of the punched-card chad is not a good idea, as the pieces
  are stiff and have sharp corners that could injure the eyes.  GLS
  reports that he once attended a wedding at MIT during which he and
  a few other guests enthusiastically threw chad instead of rice. The
  groom later grumbled that he and his bride had spent most of the
  evening trying to get the stuff out of their hair.

computer geek: n. One who eats (computer) bugs for a living.  One
  who fulfills all the dreariest negative stereotypes about hackers:
  an asocial, malodorous, pasty-faced monomaniac with all the
  personality of a cheese grater.  Cannot be used by outsiders
  without implied insult to all hackers; compare black-on-black usage
  of `nigger'.  A computer geek may be either a fundamentally
  clueless individual or a proto-hacker in {larval stage}.  Also
  called `turbo nerd', `turbo geek'.  See also
  {clustergeeking}, {geek out}, {wannabee}, {terminal
  junkie}.

computron: /kom'pyoo-tron`/ n. 1. A notional unit of computing
  power combining instruction speed and storage capacity, dimensioned
  roughly in instructions-per-second times megabytes-of-main-store
  times megabytes-of-mass-storage.  "That machine can't run GNU
  EMACS, it doesn't have enough computrons!"  This usage is usually
  found in metaphors that treat computing power as a fungible
  commodity good, like a crop yield or diesel horsepower.  See
  {bitty box}, {Get a real computer!}, {toy}, {crank}.
  2. A mythical subatomic particle that bears the unit quantity of
  computation or information, in much the same way that an electron
  bears one unit of electric charge (see also {bogon}).  An
  elaborate pseudo-scientific theory of computrons has been developed
  based on the physical fact that the molecules in a solid object
  move more rapidly as it is heated.  It is argued that an object
  melts because the molecules have lost their information about where
  they are supposed to be (that is, they have emitted computrons).
  This explains why computers get so hot and require air
  conditioning; they use up computrons.  Conversely, it should be
  possible to cool down an object by placing it in the path of a
  computron beam.  It is believed that this may also explain why
  machines that work at the factory fail in the computer room: the
  computrons there have been all used up by the other hardware.
  (This theory probably owes something to the "Warlock" stories
  by Larry Niven, the best known being "What Good is a Glass
  Dagger?", in which magic is fueled by an exhaustible natural
  resource called `mana'.)

condition out: vt. To prevent a section of code from being compiled
  by surrounding it with a conditional-compilation directive whose
  condition is always false.  The {canonical} examples are `#if
  0' (or `#ifdef notdef', though some find this {bletcherous})
  and `#endif' in C.  Compare {comment out}.

condom: n. 1. The protective plastic bag that accompanies 3.5-inch
  microfloppy diskettes.  Rarely, also used of (paper) disk envelopes.
  Unlike the write protect tab, the condom (when left on) not only
  impedes the practice of {SEX} but has also been shown to have a high
  failure rate as drive mechanisms attempt to access the disk --- and
  can even fatally frustrate insertion.  2. The protective cladding
  on a {light pipe}.

connector conspiracy: [probably came into prominence with the
  appearance of the KL-10 (one model of the {PDP-10}), none of
  whose connectors matched anything else] n. The tendency of
  manufacturers (or, by extension, programmers or purveyors of
  anything) to come up with new products that don't fit together
  with the old stuff, thereby making you buy either all new stuff or
  expensive interface devices.  The KL-10 Massbus connector was
  actually *patented* by DEC, which reputedly refused to license
  the design and thus effectively locked third parties out of
  competition for the lucrative Massbus peripherals market.  This is
  a source of never-ending frustration for the diehards who maintain
  older PDP-10 or VAX systems.  Their CPUs work fine, but they are
  stuck with dying, obsolescent disk and tape drives with low
  capacity and high power requirements.

  In these latter days of open-systems computing this term has fallen
  somewhat into disuse, to be replaced by the observation that
  "Standards are great!  There are so *many* of them to choose
  from!"  Compare {backward combatability}.

cons: /konz/ or /kons/ [from LISP] 1. vt. To add a new element
  to a specified list, esp. at the top.  "OK, cons picking a
  replacement for the console TTY onto the agenda."  2. `cons up':
  vt. To synthesize from smaller pieces: "to cons up an example".

  In LISP itself, `cons' is the most fundamental operation for
  building structures.  It takes any two objects and returns a
  `dot-pair' or two-branched tree with one object hanging from each
  branch.  Because the result of a cons is an object, it can be used
  to build binary trees of any shape and complexity.  Hackers think
  of it as a sort of universal constructor, and that is where the
  jargon meanings spring from.

considered harmful: adj. Edsger W. Dijkstra's note in the
  March 1968 `Communications of the ACM', "Goto Statement
  Considered Harmful", fired the first salvo in the structured
  programming wars.  Amusingly, the ACM considered the resulting
  acrimony sufficiently harmful that it will (by policy) no longer
  print an article taking so assertive a position against a coding
  practice.  In the ensuing decades, a large number of both serious
  papers and parodies have borne titles of the form "X
  considered Y".  The structured-programming wars eventually blew
  over with the realization that both sides were wrong, but use of
  such titles has remained as a persistent minor in-joke (the
  `considered silly' found at various places in this lexicon is
  related).

console:: n. 1. The operator's station of a {mainframe}.  In
  times past, this was a privileged location that conveyed godlike
  powers to anyone with fingers on its keys.  Under UNIX and other
  modern timesharing OSes, such privileges are guarded by passwords
  instead, and the console is just the {tty} the system was booted
  from.  Some of the mystique remains, however, and it is traditional
  for sysadmins to post urgent messages to all users from the console
  (on UNIX, /dev/console).  2. On microcomputer UNIX boxes, the main
  screen and keyboard (as opposed to character-only terminals talking
  to a serial port).  Typically only the console can do real graphics
  or run {X}.  See also {CTY}.

console jockey: n. See {terminal junkie}.

content-free: [by analogy with techspeak `context-free'] adj.
  Used of a message that adds nothing to the recipient's knowledge.
  Though this adjective is sometimes applied to {flamage}, it more
  usually connotes derision for communication styles that exalt form
  over substance or are centered on concerns irrelevant to the
  subject ostensibly at hand.  Perhaps most used with reference to
  speeches by company presidents and other professional manipulators.
  "Content-free?  Uh...that's anything printed on glossy
  paper."  See also {four-color glossies}.  "He gave a talk on
  the implications of electronic networks for postmodernism and the
  fin-de-siecle aesthetic.  It was content-free."

control-C: vi. 1. "Stop whatever you are doing."  From the
  interrupt character used on many operating systems to abort a
  running program.  Considered silly.  2. interj. Among BSD UNIX
  hackers, the canonical humorous response to "Give me a break!"

control-O: vi. "Stop talking."  From the character used on some
  operating systems to abort output but allow the program to keep on
  running.  Generally means that you are not interested in hearing
  anything more from that person, at least on that topic; a standard
  response to someone who is flaming.  Considered silly.

control-Q: vi. "Resume."  From the ASCII XON character used to
  undo a previous control-S (in fact it is also pronounced
  XON /X-on/).

control-S: vi. "Stop talking for a second."  From the ASCII XOFF
  character (this is also pronounced XOFF /X-of/).  Control-S
  differs from {control-O} in that the person is asked to stop
  talking (perhaps because you are on the phone) but will be allowed
  to continue when you're ready to listen to him --- as opposed to
  control-O, which has more of the meaning of "Shut up."  Considered
  silly.

Conway's Law: prov. The rule that the organization of the software and
  the organization of the software team will be congruent; originally
  stated as "If you have four groups working on a compiler, you'll
  get a 4-pass compiler".

  This was originally promulgated by Melvin Conway, an early
  proto-hacker who wrote an assembler for the Burroughs 220 called
  SAVE.  The name `SAVE' didn't stand for anything; it was just that
  you lost fewer card decks and listings because they all had SAVE
  written on them.

cookbook: [from amateur electronics and radio] n. A book of small
  code segments that the reader can use to do various {magic}
  things in programs.  One current example is the `PostScript
  Language Tutorial and Cookbook' by Adobe Systems, Inc
  (Addison-Wesley, ISBN 0-201-10179-3) which has recipes for things
  like wrapping text around arbitrary curves and making 3D fonts.
  Cookbooks, slavishly followed, can lead one into {voodoo
  programming}, but are useful for hackers trying to {monkey up}
  small programs in unknown languages.  This is analogous to the role
  of phrasebooks in human languages.

cookie: n. A handle, transaction ID, or other token of agreement
  between cooperating programs.  "I give him a packet, he gives me
  back a cookie."  The claim check you get from a dry-cleaning shop
  is a perfect mundane example of a cookie; the only thing it's
  useful for is to relate a later transaction to this one (so you get
  the same clothes back).  Compare {magic cookie}; see also
  {fortune cookie}.

cookie bear: n. Syn. {cookie monster}.

cookie file: n. A collection of {fortune cookie}s in a format
  that facilitates retrieval by a fortune program.  There are several
  different ones in public distribution, and site admins often
  assemble their own from various sources including this lexicon.

cookie monster: [from "Sesame Street"] n. Any of a family of
  early (1970s) hacks reported on {{TOPS-10}}, {{ITS}}, {{Multics}},
  and elsewhere that would lock up either the victim's terminal (on a
  time-sharing machine) or the {{console}} (on a batch
  {mainframe}), repeatedly demanding "I WANT A COOKIE".  The
  required responses ranged in complexity from "COOKIE" through
  "HAVE A COOKIE" and upward.  See also {wabbit}.

copper: n. Conventional electron-carrying network cable with a
  core conductor of copper --- or aluminum!  Opposed to {light
  pipe} or, say, a short-range microwave link.

copy protection: n. A class of clever methods for preventing
  incompetent pirates from stealing software and legitimate customers
  from using it.  Considered silly.

copybroke: /ko'pee-brohk/ adj. [play on `copyright'] Used to
  describe an instance of a copy-protected program that has been
  `broken'; that is, a copy with the copy-protection scheme disabled.
  Syn.  {copywronged}.

copyleft: /kop'ee-left/ [play on `copyright'] n. 1. The
  copyright notice (`General Public License') carried by {GNU}
  {EMACS} and other Free Software Foundation software, granting reuse
  and reproduction rights to all comers (but see also {General
  Public Virus}).  2. By extension, any copyright notice intended to
  achieve similar aims.

copywronged: /ko'pee-rongd/ [play on `copyright'] adj. Syn. for
  {copybroke}.

core: n. Main storage or RAM.  Dates from the days of ferrite-core
  memory; now archaic as techspeak most places outside IBM, but also
  still used in the UNIX community and by old-time hackers or those
  who would sound like them.  Some derived idioms are quite current;
  `in core', for example, means `in memory' (as opposed to `on
  disk'), and both {core dump} and the `core image' or `core
  file' produced by one are terms in favor.  Commonwealth hackish
  prefers {store}.

core dump: n. [common {Iron Age} jargon, preserved by UNIX]
  1. [techspeak] A copy of the contents of {core}, produced when a
  process is aborted by certain kinds of internal error.  2. By
  extension, used for humans passing out, vomiting, or registering
  extreme shock.  "He dumped core.  All over the floor.  What a
  mess."  "He heard about X and dumped core."  3. Occasionally
  used for a human rambling on pointlessly at great length; esp. in
  apology: "Sorry, I dumped core on you".  4. A recapitulation of
  knowledge (compare {bits}, sense 1).  Hence, spewing all one
  knows about a topic, esp. in a lecture or answer to an exam
  question.  "Short, concise answers are better than core dumps"
  (from the instructions to an exam at Columbia; syn.  {brain
  dump}).  See {core}.

core leak: n. Syn. {memory leak}.

Core Wars: n. A game between `assembler' programs in a
  simulated machine, where the objective is to kill your opponent's
  program by overwriting it.  Popularized by A. K. Dewdney's column
  in `Scientific American' magazine, this was actually
  devised by Victor Vyssotsky, Robert Morris, and Dennis Ritchie in
  the early 1960s (their original game was called `Darwin' and ran on
  a PDP-1 at Bell Labs).  See {core}.

corge: /korj/ [originally, the name of a cat] n. Yet another
  meta-syntactic variable, invented by Mike Gallaher and propagated
  by the {GOSMACS} documentation.  See {grault}.

cosmic rays: n. Notionally, the cause of {bit rot}.  However, this is
  a semi-independent usage that may be invoked as a humorous way to
  {handwave} away any minor {randomness} that doesn't seem worth the
  bother of investigating.  "Hey, Eric --- I just got a burst of
  garbage on my {tube}, where did that come from?"  "Cosmic rays, I
  guess."  Compare {sunspots}, {phase of the moon}.  The British seem
  to prefer the usage `cosmic showers'; `alpha particles' is also
  heard, because stray alpha particles passing through a memory chip
  can cause single-bit errors (this becomes increasingly more likely
  as memory sizes and densities increase).

  Factual note: Alpha particles cause bit rot, cosmic rays do not
  (except occasionally in spaceborne computers).  Intel could not
  explain random bit drops in their early chips, and one hypothesis
  was cosmic rays.  So they created the World's Largest Lead Safe,
  using 25 tons of the stuff, and used two identical boards for
  testing.  One was placed in the safe, one outside.  The hypothesis
  was that if cosmic rays were causing the bit drops, they should see
  a statistically significant difference between the error rates on
  the two boards.  They did not observe such a difference.  Further
  investigation demonstrated conclusively that the bit drops were due
  to alpha particle emissions from thorium (and to a much lesser
  degree uranium) in the encapsulation material.  Since it is
  impossible to eliminate these radioactives (they are uniformly
  distributed through the earth's crust, with the statistically
  insignificant exception of uranium lodes) it became obvious that
  you have to design memories to withstand these hits.

cough and die: v. Syn. {barf}.  Connotes that the program is
  throwing its hands up by design rather than because of a bug or
  oversight.  "The parser saw a control-A in its input where it was
  looking for a printable, so it coughed and died."

cowboy: [Sun, from William Gibson's {cyberpunk} SF] n. Synonym
  for {hacker}.  It is reported that at Sun this word is often
  said with reverence.

CP/M:: /C-P-M/ n. [Control Program for Microcomputers] An
  early microcomputer {OS} written by hacker Gary Kildall for
  8080- and Z80-based machines, very popular in the late 1970s but
  virtually wiped out by MS-DOS after the release of the IBM PC
  in 1981.  Legend has it that Kildall's company blew its chance to
  write the OS for the IBM PC because Kildall decided to spend a day
  IBM's reps wanted to meet with him enjoying the perfect flying
  weather in his private plane.  Many of CP/M's features and conventions
  strongly resemble those of early DEC operating systems such as
  {{TOPS-10}}, OS/8, RSTS, and RSX-11.  See {{MS-DOS}},
  {operating system}.

CPU Wars: /C-P-U worz/ n. A 1979 large-format comic by Chas
  Andres chronicling the attempts of the brainwashed androids of IPM
  (Impossible to Program Machines) to conquer and destroy the
  peaceful denizens of HEC (Human Engineered Computers).  This rather
  transparent allegory featured many references to {ADVENT} and
  the immortal line "Eat flaming death, minicomputer mongrels!"
  (uttered, of course, by an IPM stormtrooper).  It is alleged that
  the author subsequently received a letter of appreciation on IBM
  company stationery from the head of IBM's Thomas J. Watson Research
  Laboratories (then, as now, one of the few islands of true
  hackerdom in the IBM archipelago).  The lower loop of the B in the
  IBM logo, it is said, had been carefully whited out.  See {eat
  flaming death}.

cracker: n. One who breaks security on a system.  Coined ca. 1985
  by hackers in defense against journalistic misuse of {hacker}
  (q.v., sense 8).  An earlier attempt to establish `worm' in this
  sense around 1981--82 on USENET was largely a failure.

crank: [from automotive slang] vt. Verb used to describe the
  performance of a machine, especially sustained performance.  "This
  box cranks (or, cranks at) about 6 {megaflops}, with a burst mode
  of twice that on vectorized operations."

crash: 1. n. A sudden, usually drastic failure.  Most often said
  of the {system} (q.v., sense 1), sometimes of magnetic disk
  drives.  "Three {luser}s lost their files in last night's disk
  crash."  A disk crash that involves the read/write heads dropping
  onto the surface of the disks and scraping off the oxide may also
  be referred to as a `head crash', whereas the term `system
  crash' usually, though not always, implies that the operating
  system or other software was at fault.  2. v. To fail suddenly.
  "Has the system just crashed?"  "Something crashed the OS!" See
  {down}.  Also used transitively to indicate the cause of the
  crash (usually a person or a program, or both).  "Those idiots
  playing {SPACEWAR} crashed the system." 3. vi. Sometimes said
  of people hitting the sack after a long {hacking run}; see
  {gronk out}.

crash and burn: vi.,n. A spectacular crash, in the mode of the
  conclusion of the car-chase scene in the movie "Bullitt" and
  many subsequent imitators.  Sun-3 monitors losing the flyback
  transformer and lightning strikes on VAX-11/780 backplanes are
  notable crash and burn generators.  The construction
  `crash-and-burn machine' is reported for a computer used
  exclusively for alpha or {beta} testing, or reproducing bugs
  (i.e., not for development).  The implication is that it wouldn't
  be such a disaster if that machine crashed, since only the testers
  would be inconvenienced.

crawling horror: n. Ancient crufty hardware or software that is
  kept obstinately alive by forces beyond the control of the hackers
  at a site.  Like {dusty deck} or {gonkulator}, but connotes
  that the thing described is not just an irritation but an active
  menace to health and sanity.  "Mostly we code new stuff in C, but
  they pay us to maintain one big FORTRAN II application from
  nineteen-sixty-X that's a real crawling horror...."  Compare
  {WOMBAT}.

cray: /kray/ n. 1. (properly, capitalized) One of the line of
  supercomputers designed by Cray Research.  2. Any supercomputer at
  all.  3. The {canonical} {number-crunching} machine.

  The term is actually the lowercased last name of Seymour Cray, a
  noted computer architect and co-founder of the company.  Numerous
  vivid legends surround him, some true and some admittedly invented
  by Cray Research brass to shape their corporate culture and image.

cray instability: n. A shortcoming of a program or algorithm that
  manifests itself only when a large problem is being run on a powerful
  machine (see {cray}).  Generally more subtle than bugs that can
  be detected in smaller problems running on a workstation or mini.

crayola: /kray-oh'l*/ n. A super-mini or -micro computer that
  provides some reasonable percentage of supercomputer performance
  for an unreasonably low price.  Might also be a {killer micro}.

crayon: n. 1. Someone who works on Cray supercomputers.  More
  specifically, it implies a programmer, probably of the CDC ilk,
  probably male, and almost certainly wearing a tie (irrespective of
  gender).  Systems types who have a UNIX background tend not to be
  described as crayons.  2. A {computron} (sense 2) that
  participates only in {number-crunching}.  3. A unit of
  computational power equal to that of a single Cray-1.  There is a
  standard joke about this that derives from an old Crayola crayon
  promotional gimmick: When you buy 64 crayons you get a free
  sharpener.

creationism: n. The (false) belief that large, innovative designs
  can be completely specified in advance and then painlessly magicked
  out of the void by the normal efforts of a team of normally
  talented programmers.  In fact, experience has shown repeatedly
  that good designs arise only from evolutionary, exploratory
  interaction between one (or at most a small handful of)
  exceptionally able designer(s) and an active user population ---
  and that the first try at a big new idea is always wrong.
  Unfortunately, because these truths don't fit the planning models
  beloved of {management}, they are generally ignored.

creeping elegance: n. Describes a tendency for parts of a design to
  become {elegant} past the point of diminishing return.  This
  often happens at the expense of the less interesting parts of the
  design, the schedule, and other things deemed important in the
  {Real World}.  See also {creeping featurism}, {second-system
  effect}, {tense}.

creeping featurism: /kree'ping fee'chr-izm/ n. 1. Describes a
  systematic tendency to load more {chrome} and {feature}s onto
  systems at the expense of whatever elegance they may have possessed
  when originally designed.  See also {feeping creaturism}.  "You
  know, the main problem with {BSD} UNIX has always been creeping
  featurism."  2. More generally, the tendency for anything
  complicated to become even more complicated because people keep
  saying "Gee, it would be even better if it had this feature
  too".  (See {feature}.)  The result is usually a patchwork
  because it grew one ad-hoc step at a time, rather than being
  planned.  Planning is a lot of work, but it's easy to add just one
  extra little feature to help someone ... and then another ...
  and another....  When creeping featurism gets out of hand, it's
  like a cancer.  Usually this term is used to describe computer
  programs, but it could also be said of the federal government, the
  IRS 1040 form, and new cars.  A similar phenomenon sometimes
  afflicts conscious redesigns; see {second-system effect}.  See
  also {creeping elegance}.

creeping featuritis: /kree'ping fee'-chr-i:`t*s/ n. Variant of
  {creeping featurism}, with its own spoonerization: `feeping
  creaturitis'.  Some people like to reserve this form for the
  disease as it actually manifests in software or hardware, as
  opposed to the lurking general tendency in designers' minds.  (After
  all, -ism means `condition' or `pursuit of', whereas -itis usually
  means `inflammation of'.)

cretin: /kret'n/ or /kree'tn/ n. Congenital {loser}; an obnoxious
  person; someone who can't do anything right.  It has been observed
  that many American hackers tend to favor the British pronunciation
  /kre'tn/ over standard American /kree'tn/; it is thought this may
  be due to the insidious phonetic influence of Monty Python's Flying
  Circus.

cretinous: /kret'n-*s/ or /kreet'n-*s/ adj. Wrong; stupid;
  non-functional; very poorly designed.  Also used pejoratively of
  people.  See {dread high-bit disease} for an example.
  Approximate synonyms: {bletcherous}, `bagbiting' (see
  {bagbiter}), {losing}, {brain-damaged}.

crippleware: n. 1. Software that has some important functionality
  deliberately removed, so as to entice potential users to pay for a
  working version.  2. [Cambridge] {Guiltware} that exhorts you to
  donate to some charity (compare {careware}).  3. Hardware
  deliberately crippled, which can be upgraded to a more expensive
  model by a trivial change (e.g., cutting a jumper).

critical mass: n. In physics, the minimum amount of fissionable
  material required to sustain a chain reaction.  Of a software
  product, describes a condition of the software such that fixing one
  bug introduces one plus {epsilon} bugs.  When software achieves
  critical mass, it can only be discarded and rewritten.

crlf: /ker'l*f/, sometimes /kru'l*f/ or /C-R-L-F/ n. (often
  capitalized as `CRLF') A carriage return (CR) followed by a line
  feed (LF).  More loosely, whatever it takes to get you from the
  end of one line of text to the beginning of the next line.  See
  {newline}, {terpri}.  Under {{UNIX}} influence this usage
  has become less common (UNIX uses a bare line feed as its `CRLF').

crock: [from the obvious mainstream scatologism] n. 1. An awkward
  feature or programming technique that ought to be made cleaner.
  Using small integers to represent error codes without the
  program interpreting them to the user (as in, for example, UNIX
  `make(1)', which returns code 139 for a process that dies due
  to {segfault}).  2. A technique that works acceptably, but which
  is quite prone to failure if disturbed in the least, for example
  depending on the machine opcodes having particular bit patterns so
  that you can use instructions as data words too; a tightly woven,
  almost completely unmodifiable structure.  See {kluge},
  {brittle}.  Also in the adjectives `crockish' and
  `crocky', and the nouns `crockishness' and `crockitude'.

cross-post: [USENET] vi. To post a single article simultaneously to
  several newsgroups.  Distinguished from posting the article
  repeatedly, once to each newsgroup, which causes people to see it
  multiple times (this is very bad form).  Gratuitous cross-posting
  without a Followup-To line directing responses to a single followup
  group is frowned upon, as it tends to cause {followup} articles
  to go to inappropriate newsgroups when people respond to only one
  part of the original posting.

crudware: /kruhd'weir/ n. Pejorative term for the hundreds of
  megabytes of low-quality {freeware} circulated by user's groups
  and BBS systems in the micro-hobbyist world.  "Yet *another*
  set of disk catalog utilities for {{MS-DOS}}?  What crudware!"

cruft: /kruhft/ [back-formation from {crufty}] 1. n. An
  unpleasant substance.  The dust that gathers under your bed is
  cruft; the TMRC Dictionary correctly noted that attacking it with a
  broom only produces more.  2. n. The results of shoddy
  construction.  3. vt. [from `hand cruft', pun on `hand craft'] To
  write assembler code for something normally (and better) done by a
  compiler (see {hand-hacking}).  4. n. Excess; superfluous junk.
  Esp. used of redundant or superseded code.

cruft together: vt. (also `cruft up') To throw together
  something ugly but temporarily workable.  Like vt. {kluge up},
  but more pejorative.  "There isn't any program now to reverse all
  the lines of a file, but I can probably cruft one together in about
  10 minutes."  See {hack together}, {hack up}, {kluge up},
  {crufty}.

cruftsmanship: /kruhfts'm*n-ship / n. [from {cruft}] The
  antithesis of craftsmanship.

crufty: /kruhf'tee/ [origin unknown; poss. from `crusty' or
  `cruddy'] adj. 1. Poorly built, possibly over-complex.  The
  {canonical} example is "This is standard old crufty DEC
  software".  In fact, one fanciful theory of the origin of `crufty'
  holds that was originally a mutation of `crusty' applied to DEC
  software so old that the `s' characters were tall and skinny, looking
  more like `f' characters.  2. Unpleasant, especially to the touch,
  often with encrusted junk.  Like spilled coffee smeared with peanut
  butter and catsup.  3. Generally unpleasant.  4. (sometimes spelled
  `cruftie') n. A small crufty object (see {frob}); often one
  that doesn't fit well into the scheme of things.  "A LISP property
  list is a good place to store crufties (or, collectively,
  {random} cruft)."

crumb: n. Two binary digits; a {quad}.  Larger than a {bit},
  smaller than a {nybble}.  Considered silly.  Syn. {tayste}.

crunch: 1. vi. To process, usually in a time-consuming or
  complicated way.  Connotes an essentially trivial operation that is
  nonetheless painful to perform.  The pain may be due to the
  triviality's being embedded in a loop from 1 to 1,000,000,000.
  "FORTRAN programs do mostly {number-crunching}."  2. vt. To
  reduce the size of a file by a complicated scheme that produces bit
  configurations completely unrelated to the original data, such as
  by a Huffman code.  (The file ends up looking like a paper document
  would if somebody crunched the paper into a wad.)  Since such
  compression usually takes more computations than simpler methods
  such as run-length encoding, the term is doubly appropriate.  (This
  meaning is usually used in the construction `file crunch(ing)' to
  distinguish it from {number-crunching}.)  See {compress}.
  3. n. The character `#'.  Used at XEROX and CMU, among other
  places.  See {{ASCII}}.  4. vt. To squeeze program source into a
  minimum-size representation that will still compile or execute.
  The term came into being specifically for a famous program on the
  BBC micro that crunched BASIC source in order to make it run more
  quickly (it was a wholly interpretive BASIC, so the number of
  characters mattered).  {Obfuscated C Contest} entries are often
  crunched; see the first example under that entry.

cruncha cruncha cruncha: /kruhn'ch* kruhn'ch* kruhn'ch*/ interj.
  An encouragement sometimes muttered to a machine bogged down in a
  serious {grovel}.  Also describes a notional sound made by
  groveling hardware.  See {wugga wugga}, {grind} (sense 3).

cryppie: /krip'ee/ n. A cryptographer.  One who hacks or implements
  cryptographic software or hardware.

CTSS: /C-T-S-S/ n. Compatible Time-Sharing System.  An early
  (1963) experiment in the design of interactive time-sharing
  operating systems, ancestral to {{Multics}}, {{UNIX}}, and
  {{ITS}}.  The name {{ITS}} (Incompatible Time-sharing System)
  was a hack on CTSS, meant both as a joke and to express some basic
  differences in philosophy about the way I/O services should be
  presented to user programs.

CTY: /sit'ee/ or /C-T-Y/ n. [MIT] The terminal physically
  associated with a computer's system {{console}}.  The term is a
  contraction of `Console {tty}', that is, `Console TeleTYpe'.
  This {{ITS}}- and {{TOPS-10}}-associated term has become less
  common, as most UNIX hackers simply refer to the CTY as `the
  console'.

cube: n. 1. [short for `cubicle'] A module in the open-plan
  offices used at many programming shops.  "I've got the manuals in
  my cube."  2. A NeXT machine (which resembles a matte-black cube).

cubing: [parallel with `tubing'] vi. 1. Hacking on an IPSC (Intel
  Personal SuperComputer) hypercube.  "Louella's gone cubing
  *again*!!"  2. Hacking Rubik's Cube or related puzzles,
  either physically or mathematically.  3. An indescribable form of
  self-torture (see sense 1 or #2).

cursor dipped in X: n. There are a couple of metaphors in English
  of the form `pen dipped in X' (perhaps the most common values of X
  are `acid', `bile', and `vitriol').  These map over neatly to this
  hackish usage (the cursor being what moves, leaving letters behind,
  when one is composing on-line).  "Talk about a {nastygram}!  He
  must've had his cursor dipped in acid when he wrote that one!"

cuspy: /kuhs'pee/ [WPI: from the DEC acronym CUSP, for `Commonly
  Used System Program', i.e., a utility program used by many people]
  adj. 1. (of a program) Well-written.  2. Functionally excellent.  A
  program that performs well and interfaces well to users is cuspy.
  See {rude}.  3. [NYU] Said of an attractive woman, especially one
  regarded as available.  Implies a certain curvaceousness.

cut a tape: [poss. fr. mainstream `cut a check' or from the
  recording industry's `cut a record'] vi. To write a software or
  document distribution on magnetic tape for shipment.  Has nothing
  to do with physically cutting the medium!  Though this usage is
  quite widespread, one never speaks of analogously `cutting a disk'
  or anything else in this sense.

cybercrud: /si:'ber-kruhd/ [coined by Ted Nelson] n. Obfuscatory
  tech-talk.  Verbiage with a high {MEGO} factor.  The computer
  equivalent of bureaucratese.

cyberpunk: /si:'ber-puhnk/ [orig. by SF writer Bruce Bethke and/or
  editor Gardner Dozois] n.,adj. A subgenre of SF launched in 1982
  by William Gibson's epoch-making novel `Neuromancer' (though
  its roots go back through Vernor Vinge's `True Names' (see
  the Bibliography) to John Brunner's 1975 novel `The Shockwave
  Rider').  Gibson's near-total ignorance of computers and the
  present-day hacker culture enabled him to speculate about the role
  of computers and hackers in the future in ways hackers have since
  found both irritatingly na"ive and tremendously stimulating.
  Gibson's work was widely imitated, in particular by the short-lived
  but innovative "Max Headroom" TV series.  See {cyberspace},
  {ice}, {go flatline}.

cyberspace: /si:'ber-spays/ n. 1. Notional `information-space'
  loaded with visual cues and navigable with brain-computer
  interfaces called `cyberspace decks'; a characteristic prop of
  {cyberpunk} SF.  At the time of this writing (mid-1991),
  serious efforts to construct {virtual reality} interfaces
  modeled explicitly on Gibsonian cyberspace are already under way,
  using more conventional devices such as glove sensors and binocular
  TV headsets.  Few hackers are prepared to deny outright the
  possibility of a cyberspace someday evolving out of the network
  (see {network, the}).  2. Occasionally, the metaphoric location
  of the mind of a person in {hack mode}.  Some hackers report
  experiencing strong eidetic imagery when in hack mode;
  interestingly, independent reports from multiple sources suggest
  that there are common features to the experience.  In particular,
  the dominant colors of this subjective `cyberspace' are often
  gray and silver, and the imagery often involves constellations of
  marching dots, elaborate shifting patterns of lines and angles, or
  moire patterns.

cycle: 1. n. The basic unit of computation.  What every hacker
  wants more of (noted hacker Bill Gosper describes himself as a
  "cycle junkie"). One can describe an instruction as taking so
  many `clock cycles'.  Often the computer can access its
  memory once on every clock cycle, and so one speaks also of
  `memory cycles'.  These are technical meanings of {cycle}.  The
  jargon meaning comes from the observation that there are only so
  many cycles per second, and when you are sharing a computer the
  cycles get divided up among the users.  The more cycles the
  computer spends working on your program rather than someone else's,
  the faster your program will run.  That's why every hacker wants
  more cycles: so he can spend less time waiting for the computer to
  respond.  2. By extension, a notional unit of *human* thought
  power, emphasizing that lots of things compete for the typical
  hacker's think time.  "I refused to get involved with the Rubik's
  Cube back when it was big.  Knew I'd burn too many cycles on it if
  I let myself."  3. vt. Syn. {bounce}, {120 reset}; from the
  phrase `cycle power'. "Cycle the machine again, that serial port's
  still hung."

cycle crunch: n. A situation where the number of people trying to
  use the computer simultaneously has reached the point where no one
  can get enough cycles because they are spread too thin and the
  system has probably begun to {thrash}.  This is an inevitable
  result of Parkinson's Law applied to timesharing.  Usually the only
  solution is to buy more computer.  Happily, this has rapidly become
  easier in recent years, so much so that the very term `cycle
  crunch' now has a faintly archaic flavor; most hackers now use
  workstations or personal computers as opposed to traditional
  timesharing systems.

cycle drought: n. A scarcity of cycles.  It may be due to a {cycle
  crunch}, but it could also occur because part of the computer is
  temporarily not working, leaving fewer cycles to go around.
  "The {high moby} is {down}, so we're running with only
  half the usual amount of memory.  There will be a cycle drought
  until it's fixed."

cycle of reincarnation: [coined by Ivan Sutherland ca. 1970] n.
  Term used to refer to a well-known effect whereby function in a
  computing system family is migrated out to special-purpose
  peripheral hardware for speed, then the peripheral evolves toward
  more computing power as it does its job, then somebody notices that
  it is inefficient to support two asymmetrical processors in the
  architecture and folds the function back into the main CPU, at
  which point the cycle begins again.  Several iterations of this
  cycle have been observed in graphics-processor design, and at least
  one or two in communications and floating-point processors.  Also
  known as `the Wheel of Life', `the Wheel of Samsara', and other
  variations of the basic Hindu/Buddhist theological idea.

cycle server: n. A powerful machine that exists primarily for
  running large {batch} jobs.  Implies that interactive tasks such as
  editing are done on other machines on the network, such as
  workstations.

= D =
=====

D. C. Power Lab: n. The former site of {{SAIL}}.  Hackers thought
  this was very funny because the obvious connection to electrical
  engineering was nonexistent --- the lab was named for a Donald C.
  Power.  Compare {Marginal Hacks}.

daemon: /day'mn/ or /dee'mn/ [from the mythological meaning,
  later rationalized as the acronym `Disk And Execution MONitor'] n.
  A program that is not invoked explicitly, but lies dormant waiting
  for some condition(s) to occur.  The idea is that the perpetrator
  of the condition need not be aware that a daemon is lurking (though
  often a program will commit an action only because it knows that it
  will implicitly invoke a daemon).  For example, under {{ITS}}
  writing a file on the {LPT} spooler's directory would invoke the
  spooling daemon, which would then print the file.  The advantage is
  that programs wanting (in this example) files printed need not
  compete for access to the {LPT}.  They simply enter their
  implicit requests and let the daemon decide what to do with them.
  Daemons are usually spawned automatically by the system, and may
  either live forever or be regenerated at intervals.  Daemon and
  {demon} are often used interchangeably, but seem to have
  distinct connotations.  The term `daemon' was introduced to
  computing by {CTSS} people (who pronounced it /dee'mon/) and
  used it to refer to what ITS called a {dragon}.  Although the
  meaning and the pronunciation have drifted, we think this glossary
  reflects current (1991) usage.

dangling pointer: n. A reference that doesn't actually lead
  anywhere (in C and some other languages, a pointer that doesn't
  actually point at anything valid).  Usually this is because it
  formerly pointed to something that has moved or disappeared.  Used
  as jargon in a generalization of its techspeak meaning; for
  example, a local phone number for a person who has since moved to the
  other coast is a dangling pointer.

Datamation: /day`t*-may'sh*n/ n. A magazine that many hackers
  assume all {suit}s read.  Used to question an unbelieved quote,
  as in "Did you read that in `Datamation?'" It used to
  publish something hackishly funny every once in a while, like the
  original paper on {COME FROM} in 1973, but it has since become much
  more exclusively {suit}-oriented and boring.

day mode: n. See {phase} (sense 1).  Used of people only.

dd: /dee-dee/ [UNIX: from IBM {JCL}] vt. Equivalent to {cat}
  or {BLT}.  This was originally the name of a UNIX copy command
  with special options suitable for block-oriented devices.  Often
  used in heavy-handed system maintenance, as in "Let's dd the root
  partition onto a tape, then use the boot PROM to load it back on to
  a new disk".  The UNIX `dd(1)' was designed with a weird,
  distinctly non-UNIXy keyword option syntax reminiscent of IBM
  System/360 JCL (which had a similar DD command); though the command
  filled a need, the interface design was clearly a prank.  The
  jargon usage is now very rare outside UNIX sites and now nearly
  obsolete even there, as `dd(1)' has been {deprecated} for a
  long time (though it has no exact replacement).  Replaced by
  {BLT} or simple English `copy'.

DDT: /D-D-T/ n. 1. Generic term for a program that assists in
  debugging other programs by showing individual machine instructions
  in a readable symbolic form and letting the user change them.  In
  this sense the term DDT is now archaic, having been widely
  displaced by `debugger' or names of individual programs like
  `dbx', `adb', `gdb', or `sdb'.  2. [ITS] Under
  MIT's fabled {{ITS}} operating system, DDT (running under the alias
  HACTRN) was also used as the {shell} or top level command
  language used to execute other programs.  3. Any one of several
  specific DDTs (sense 1) supported on early DEC hardware.  The DEC
  PDP-10 Reference Handbook (1969) contained a footnote on the first
  page of the documentation for DDT which illuminates the origin of
  the term:

    Historical footnote: DDT was developed at MIT for the PDP-1
    computer in 1961.  At that time DDT stood for "DEC Debugging Tape".
    Since then, the idea of an on-line debugging program has propagated
    throughout the computer industry.  DDT programs are now available
    for all DEC computers.  Since media other than tape are now
    frequently used, the more descriptive name "Dynamic Debugging
    Technique" has been adopted, retaining the DDT acronym.  Confusion
    between DDT-10 and another well known pesticide,
    dichloro-diphenyl-trichloroethane (C14-H9-Cl5) should be minimal
    since each attacks a different, and apparently mutually exclusive,
    class of bugs.

  Sadly, this quotation was removed from later editions of the
  handbook after the {suit}s took over and DEC became much more
  `businesslike'.

de-rezz: /dee-rez'/ [from `de-resolve' via the movie "Tron"]
  (also `derez') 1. vi. To disappear or dissolve; the image that goes
  with it is of an object breaking up into raster lines and static
  and then dissolving.  Occasionally used of a person who seems to
  have suddenly `fuzzed out' mentally rather than physically.
  Usage: extremely silly, also rare.  This verb was actually invented
  as *fictional* hacker jargon, and adopted in a spirit of irony
  by real hackers years after the fact.  2. vt. On a Macintosh, many
  program structures (including the code itself) are managed in small
  segments of the program file known as `resources'. The standard
  resource compiler is Rez.  The standard resource decompiler is
  DeRez.  Thus, decompiling a resource is `derezzing'.  Usage: very
  common.

dead code: n. Routines that can never be accessed because all calls
  to them have been removed, or code that cannot be reached because
  it is guarded by a control structure that provably must always
  transfer control somewhere else.  The presence of dead code may
  reveal either logical errors due to alterations in the program or
  significant changes in the assumptions and environment of the
  program (see also {software rot}); a good compiler should report
  dead code so a maintainer can think about what it means.  Syn.
  {grunge}.

DEADBEEF: /ded-beef/ n. The hexadecimal word-fill pattern for
  freshly allocated memory (decimal -21524111) under a number of
  IBM environments, including the RS/6000.  As in "Your program is
  DEADBEEF" (meaning gone, aborted, flushed from memory); if you
  start from an odd half-word boundary, of course, you have
  BEEFDEAD.

deadlock: n. 1. [techspeak] A situation wherein two or more
  processes are unable to proceed because each is waiting for one of
  the others to do something.  A common example is a program
  communicating to a server, which may find itself waiting for output
  from the server before sending anything more to it, while the
  server is similarly waiting for more input from the controlling
  program before outputting anything.  (It is reported that this
  particular flavor of deadlock is sometimes called a `starvation
  deadlock', though the term `starvation' is more properly used for
  situations where a program can never run simply because it never
  gets high enough priority.  Another common flavor is
  `constipation', where each process is trying to send stuff to
  the other but all buffers are full because nobody is reading
  anything.)  See {deadly embrace}.  2. Also used of
  deadlock-like interactions between humans, as when two people meet
  in a narrow corridor, and each tries to be polite by moving aside
  to let the other pass, but they end up swaying from side to side
  without making any progress because they always both move the same
  way at the same time.

deadly embrace: n. Same as {deadlock}, though usually used only when
  exactly 2 processes are involved.  This is the more popular term in
  Europe, while {deadlock} predominates in the United States.

Death Star: [from the movie "Star Wars"] 1. The AT&T corporate
  logo, which appears on computers sold by AT&T and bears an uncanny
  resemblance to the `Death Star' in the movie.  This usage is
  particularly common among partisans of {BSD} UNIX, who tend to
  regard the AT&T versions as inferior and AT&T as a bad guy.  Copies
  still circulate of a poster printed by Mt. Xinu showing a starscape
  with a space fighter labeled 4.2 BSD streaking away from a broken
  AT&T logo wreathed in flames.  2. AT&T's internal magazine,
  `Focus', uses `death star' for an incorrectly done AT&T logo
  in which the inner circle in the top left is dark instead of light
  --- a frequent result of dark-on-light logo images.

DEC Wars: n. A 1983 {USENET} posting by Alan Hastings and Steve Tarr
  spoofing the "Star Wars" movies in hackish terms.  Some years
  later, ESR (disappointed by Hastings and Tarr's failure to exploit a
  great premise more thoroughly) posted a 3-times-longer complete
  rewrite called "UNIX WARS"; the two are often confused.

DEChead: /dek'hed/ n. 1. A DEC {field servoid}.  Not flattering.
  2. [from `deadhead'] A Grateful Dead fan working at DEC.

deckle: /dek'l/ [from dec- and {nickle}] n. Two {nickle}s;
  10 bits.  Reported among developers for Mattel's GI 1600 (the
  Intellivision games processor), a chip with 16-bit-wide RAM but
  10-bit-wide ROM.

deep hack mode: n. See {hack mode}.

deep magic: [poss. from C. S. Lewis's "Narnia" books] n. An
  awesomely arcane technique central to a program or system, esp. one
  not generally published and available to hackers at large (compare
  {black art}); one that could only have been composed by a true
  {wizard}.  Compiler optimization techniques and many aspects of
  {OS} design used to be {deep magic}; many techniques in
  cryptography, signal processing, graphics, and AI still are.
  Compare {heavy wizardry}.  Esp. found in comments of the form
  "Deep magic begins here...".  Compare {voodoo programming}.

deep space: n. 1. Describes the notional location of any program
  that has gone {off the trolley}.  Esp. used of programs that
  just sit there silently grinding long after either failure or some
  output is expected.  "Uh oh.  I should have gotten a prompt ten
  seconds ago.  The program's in deep space somewhere." Compare
  {buzz}, {catatonic}, {hyperspace}.  2. The metaphorical
  location of a human so dazed and/or confused or caught up in some
  esoteric form of {bogosity} that he or she no longer responds
  coherently to normal communication.  Compare {page out}.

defenestration: [from the traditional Czechoslovak method of
  assassinating prime ministers, via SF fandom] n. 1. Proper karmic
  retribution for an incorrigible punster.  "Oh, ghod, that was
  *awful*!"  "Quick! Defenestrate him!"  2. The act of
  exiting a window system in order to get better response time from a
  full-screen program.  This comes from the dictionary meaning of
  `defenestrate', which is to throw something out a window.  3. The
  act of discarding something under the assumption that it will
  improve matters.  "I don't have any disk space left."  "Well,
  why don't you defenestrate that 100 megs worth of old core dumps?"
  4. [proposed] The requirement to support a command-line interface.
  "It has to run on a VT100."  "Curses!  I've been
  defenestrated!"

defined as: adj. In the role of, usually in an organization-chart
  sense.  "Pete is currently defined as bug prioritizer."  Compare
  {logical}.

dehose: /dee-hohz/ vt. To clear a {hosed} condition.

delint: /dee-lint/ v. To modify code to remove problems detected
  when {lint}ing.

delta: n. 1. [techspeak] A quantitative change, especially a small
  or incremental one (this use is general in physics and
  engineering).  "I just doubled the speed of my program!"  "What
  was the delta on program size?"  "About 30 percent."  (He
  doubled the speed of his program, but increased its size by only 30
  percent.)  2. [UNIX] A {diff}, especially a {diff} stored
  under the set of version-control tools called SCCS (Source Code
  Control System) or RCS (Revision Control System).  3. n. A small
  quantity, but not as small as {epsilon}.  The jargon usage of
  {delta} and {epsilon} stems from the traditional use of these
  letters in mathematics for very small numerical quantities,
  particularly in `epsilon-delta' proofs in limit theory (as in the
  differential calculus).  The term {delta} is often used, once
  {epsilon} has been mentioned, to mean a quantity that is
  slightly bigger than {epsilon} but still very small.  "The cost
  isn't epsilon, but it's delta" means that the cost isn't totally
  negligible, but it is nevertheless very small.  Common
  constructions include `within delta of ---', `within epsilon of
  ---': that is, close to and even closer to.

demented: adj. Yet another term of disgust used to describe a
  program.  The connotation in this case is that the program works as
  designed, but the design is bad.  Said, for example, of a program
  that generates large numbers of meaningless error messages,
  implying that it is on the brink of imminent collapse.  Compare
  {wonky}, {bozotic}.

demigod: n. A hacker with years of experience, a national reputation,
  and a major role in the development of at least one design, tool,
  or game used by or known to more than half of the hacker community.
  To qualify as a genuine demigod, the person must recognizably
  identify with the hacker community and have helped shape it.  Major
  demigods include Ken Thompson and Dennis Ritchie (co-inventors of
  {{UNIX}} and {C}) and Richard M. Stallman (inventor of
  {EMACS}).  In their hearts of hearts, most hackers dream of
  someday becoming demigods themselves, and more than one major
  software project has been driven to completion by the author's
  veiled hopes of apotheosis.  See also {net.god}, {true-hacker}.

demo: /de'moh/ [short for `demonstration'] 1. v. To demonstrate a
  product or prototype.  A far more effective way of inducing bugs to
  manifest than any number of {test} runs, especially when
  important people are watching.  2. n. The act of demoing.

demo mode: [Sun] n. 1. The state of being {heads down} in order
  to finish code in time for a {demo}, usually due yesterday.
  2. A mode in which video games sit there by themselves running
  through a portion of the game, also known as `attract mode'.
  Some serious {app}s have a demo mode they use as a screen saver,
  or may go through a demo mode on startup (for example, the
  Microsoft Windows opening screen --- which lets you impress your
  neighbors without actually having to put up with {Microsloth
  Windows}).

demon: n. 1. [MIT] A portion of a program that is not invoked
  explicitly, but that lies dormant waiting for some condition(s) to
  occur.  See {daemon}.  The distinction is that demons are
  usually processes within a program, while daemons are usually
  programs running on an operating system.  Demons are particularly
  common in AI programs.  For example, a knowledge-manipulation
  program might implement inference rules as demons.  Whenever a new
  piece of knowledge was added, various demons would activate (which
  demons depends on the particular piece of data) and would create
  additional pieces of knowledge by applying their respective
  inference rules to the original piece.  These new pieces could in
  turn activate more demons as the inferences filtered down through
  chains of logic.  Meanwhile, the main program could continue with
  whatever its primary task was.  2. [outside MIT] Often used
  equivalently to {daemon} --- especially in the {{UNIX}} world,
  where the latter spelling and pronunciation is considered mildly
  archaic.

depeditate: /dee-ped'*-tayt/ [by (faulty) analogy with
  `decapitate'] vt.  Humorously, to cut off the feet of.  When one is
  using some computer-aided typesetting tools, careless placement of
  text blocks within a page or above a rule can result in chopped-off
  letter descenders.  Such letters are said to have been depeditated.

deprecated: adj. Said of a program or feature that is considered
  obsolescent and in the process of being phased out, usually in
  favor of a specified replacement.  Deprecated features can,
  unfortunately, linger on for many years.

deserves to lose: adj. Said of someone who willfully does the
  {Wrong Thing}; humorously, if one uses a feature known to be
  {marginal}.  What is meant is that one deserves the consequences
  of one's {losing} actions.  "Boy, anyone who tries to use
  {mess-dos} deserves to {lose}!" ({{ITS}} fans used to say this
  of {{UNIX}}; many still do.)  See also {screw}, {chomp},
  {bagbiter}.

desk check: n.,v. To {grovel} over hardcopy of source code,
  mentally simulating the control flow; a method of catching bugs.
  No longer common practice in this age of on-screen editing, fast
  compiles, and sophisticated debuggers --- though some maintain
  stoutly that it ought to be.  Compare {eyeball search},
  {vdiff}, {vgrep}.

Devil Book: n. `The Design and Implementation of the 4.3BSD
  UNIX Operating System', by Samuel J. Leffler, Marshall Kirk
  McKusick, Michael J. Karels, and John S. Quarterman (Addison-Wesley
  Publishers, 1989) --- the standard reference book on the internals
  of {BSD} UNIX.  So called because the cover has a picture
  depicting a little devil (a visual play on {daemon}) in
  sneakers, holding a pitchfork (referring to one of the
  characteristic features of UNIX, the {fork(2)} system call).

devo: /dee'voh/ [orig. in-house jargon at Symbolics] n. A person in a
  development group.  See also {doco} and {mango}.

dickless workstation: n. Extremely pejorative hackerism for
  `diskless workstation', a class of botches including the Sun 3/50
  and other machines designed exclusively to network with an
  expensive central disk server.  These combine all the disadvantages
  of time-sharing with all the disadvantages of distributed personal
  computers.

dictionary flame: [USENET] n. An attempt to sidetrack a debate
  away from issues by insisting on meanings for key terms that
  presuppose a desired conclusion or smuggle in an implicit premise.
  A common tactic of people who prefer argument over definitions to
  disputes about reality.

diddle: 1. vt. To work with or modify in a not particularly
  serious manner.  "I diddled a copy of {ADVENT} so it didn't
  double-space all the time."  "Let's diddle this piece of code and
  see if the problem goes away."  See {tweak} and {twiddle}.
  2. n. The action or result of diddling.  See also {tweak},
  {twiddle}, {frob}.

diff: /dif/ n. 1. A change listing, especially giving differences
  between (and additions to) source code or documents (the term is
  often used in the plural `diffs').  "Send me your diffs for the
  Jargon File!"  Compare {vdiff}.  2. Specifically, such a listing
  produced by the `diff(1)' command, esp. when used as
  specification input to the `patch(1)' utility (which can
  actually perform the modifications; see {patch}).  This is a
  common method of distributing patches and source updates in the
  UNIX/C world.  See also {vdiff}, {mod}.

digit: n. An employee of Digital Equipment Corporation.  See also
  {VAX}, {VMS}, {PDP-10}, {{TOPS-10}}, {DEChead}, {double
  DECkers}, {field circus}.

dike: vt. To remove or disable a portion of something, as a wire
  from a computer or a subroutine from a program.  A standard slogan
  is "When in doubt, dike it out".  (The implication is that it is
  usually more effective to attack software problems by reducing
  complexity than by increasing it.)  The word `dikes' is widely
  used among mechanics and engineers to mean `diagonal cutters',
  esp.  a heavy-duty metal-cutting device, but may also refer to a
  kind of wire-cutters used by electronics techs.  To `dike
  something out' means to use such cutters to remove something.
  Indeed, the TMRC Dictionary defined dike as "to attack with
  dikes".  Among hackers this term has been metaphorically extended
  to informational objects such as sections of code.

ding: n.,vi. 1. Synonym for {feep}.  Usage: rare among hackers,
  but commoner in the {Real World}.  2. `dinged': What happens
  when someone in authority gives you a minor bitching about
  something, esp. something trivial.  "I was dinged for having a
  messy desk."

dink: /dink/ n. Said of a machine that has the {bitty box}
  nature; a machine too small to be worth bothering with --- sometimes
  the system you're currently forced to work on.  First heard from an
  MIT hacker (BADOB) working on a CP/M system with 64K, in reference
  to any 6502 system, then from fans of 32-bit architectures about
  16-bit machines.  "GNUMACS will never work on that dink machine."
  Probably derived from mainstream `dinky', which isn't sufficiently
  pejorative.

dinosaur: n. 1. Any hardware requiring raised flooring and special
  power.  Used especially of old minis and mainframes, in contrast
  with newer microprocessor-based machines.  In a famous quote from
  the 1988 UNIX EXPO, Bill Joy compared the mainframe in the massive
  IBM display with a grazing dinosaur "with a truck outside pumping
  its bodily fluids through it".  IBM was not amused.  Compare
  {big iron}; see also {mainframe}.  2. [IBM] A very conservative
  user; a {zipperhead}.

dinosaur pen: n. A traditional {mainframe} computer room complete with
  raised flooring, special power, its own ultra-heavy-duty air
  conditioning, and a side order of Halon fire extinguishers.  See
  {boa}.

dinosaurs mating: n. Said to occur when yet another {big iron}
  merger or buyout occurs; reflects a perception by hackers that
  these signal another stage in the long, slow dying of the
  {mainframe} industry.  In its glory days of the 1960s, it was
  `IBM and the Seven Dwarves': Burroughs, Control Data, General
  Electric, Honeywell, NCR, RCA, and Univac.  RCA and GE sold out
  early, and it was `IBM and the Bunch' (Burroughs, Univac, NCR,
  Control Data, and Honeywell) for a while.  Honeywell was bought out
  by Bull; Burroughs merged with Univac to form Unisys (in 1984 --- this
  was when the phrase `dinosaurs mating' was coined); and as this is
  written AT&T is attempting to recover from a disastrously bad first
  6 years in the hardware industry by absorbing NCR.  More such
  earth-shaking unions of doomed giants seem inevitable.

dirty power: n. Electrical mains voltage that is unfriendly to
  the delicate innards of computers.  Spikes, {drop-outs}, average
  voltage significantly higher or lower than nominal, or just plain
  noise can all cause problems of varying subtlety and severity.

Discordianism: /dis-kor'di-*n-ism/ n. The veneration of
  {Eris}, a.k.a. Discordia; widely popular among hackers.
  Discordianism was popularized by Robert Anton Wilson's
  `Illuminatus!' trilogy as a sort of self-subverting Dada-Zen
  for Westerners --- it should on no account be taken seriously but
  is far more serious than most jokes.  Consider, for example, the
  Fifth Commandment of the Pentabarf, from `Principia
  Discordia': "A Discordian is Prohibited of Believing What he
  Reads."  Discordianism is usually connected with an elaborate
  conspiracy theory/joke involving millennia-long warfare between the
  anarcho-surrealist partisans of Eris and a malevolent,
  authoritarian secret society called the Illuminati.  See
  appendix B, {Church of the SubGenius}, and {ha ha only
  serious}.

disk farm: n. (also {laundromat}) A large room or rooms filled
  with disk drives (esp. {washing machine}s).

display hack: n. A program with the same approximate purpose as a
  kaleidoscope: to make pretty pictures.  Famous display hacks
  include {munching squares}, {smoking clover}, the BSD UNIX
  `rain(6)' program, `worms(6)' on miscellaneous UNIXes,
  and the {X} `kaleid(1)' program.  Display hacks can also be
  implemented without programming by creating text files containing
  numerous escape sequences for interpretation by a video terminal;
  one notable example displayed, on any VT100, a Christmas tree with
  twinkling lights and a toy train circling its base.  The {hack
  value} of a display hack is proportional to the esthetic value of
  the images times the cleverness of the algorithm divided by the
  size of the code.  Syn. {psychedelicware}.

Dissociated Press: [play on `Associated Press'; perhaps inspired
  by a reference in the 1949 Bugs Bunny cartoon "What's Up,
  Doc?"] n.  An algorithm for transforming any text into potentially
  humorous garbage even more efficiently than by passing it through a
  {marketroid}.  You start by printing any N consecutive
  words (or letters) in the text.  Then at every step you search for
  any random occurrence in the original text of the last N
  words (or letters) already printed and then print the next word or
  letter.  {EMACS} has a handy command for this.  Here is a short
  example of word-based Dissociated Press applied to an earlier
  version of this Jargon File:

    wart: n. A small, crocky {feature} that sticks out of
    an array (C has no checks for this).  This is relatively
    benign and easy to spot if the phrase is bent so as to be
    not worth paying attention to the medium in question.

  Here is a short example of letter-based Dissociated Press applied
  to the same source:

    window sysIWYG: n. A bit was named aften /bee't*/ prefer
    to use the other guy's re, especially in every cast a
    chuckle on neithout getting into useful informash speech
    makes removing a featuring a move or usage actual
    abstractionsidered interj. Indeed spectace logic or problem!

  A hackish idle pastime is to apply letter-based Dissociated Press
  to a random body of text and {vgrep} the output in hopes of finding
  an interesting new word.  (In the preceding example, `window
  sysIWYG' and `informash' show some promise.)  Iterated applications
  of Dissociated Press usually yield better results.  Similar
  techniques called `travesty generators' have been employed with
  considerable satirical effect to the utterances of USENET flamers;
  see {pseudo}.

distribution: n. 1. A software source tree packaged for
  distribution; but see {kit}.  2. A vague term encompassing
  mailing lists and USENET newsgroups (but not {BBS} {fora}); any
  topic-oriented message channel with multiple recipients.  3. An
  information-space domain (usually loosely correlated with
  geography) to which propagation of a USENET message is restricted;
  a much-underutilized feature.

do protocol: [from network protocol programming] vi. To perform an
  interaction with somebody or something that follows a clearly
  defined procedure.  For example, "Let's do protocol with the
  check" at a restaurant means to ask for the check, calculate the
  tip and everybody's share, collect money from everybody, generate
  change as necessary, and pay the bill.  See {protocol}.

doc: /dok/ n. Common spoken and written shorthand for
  `documentation'.  Often used in the plural `docs' and in the
  construction `doc file' (documentation available on-line).

doco: /do'koh/ [orig. in-house jargon at Symbolics] n. A
  documentation writer.  See also {devo} and {mango}.

documentation:: n. The multiple kilograms of macerated, pounded,
  steamed, bleached, and pressed trees that accompany most modern
  software or hardware products (see also {tree-killer}).  Hackers
  seldom read paper documentation and (too) often resist writing it;
  they prefer theirs to be terse and on-line.  A common comment on
  this is "You can't {grep} dead trees".  See {drool-proof
  paper}, {verbiage}.

dodgy: adj. Syn. with {flaky}.  Preferred outside the U.S.

dogcow: /dog'kow/ n. See {Moof}.

dogwash: /dog'wosh/ [From a quip in the `urgency' field of a very
  optional software change request, ca. 1982.  It was something like
  "Urgency: Wash your dog first".] 1. n. A project of minimal
  priority, undertaken as an escape from more serious work.  2. v.
  To engage in such a project.  Many games and much {freeware} get
  written this way.

domainist: /doh-mayn'ist/ adj. 1. Said of an {{Internet
  address}} (as opposed to a {bang path}) because the part to the
  right of the `@' specifies a nested series of `domains';
  for example, [email protected] specifies the machine
  called snark in the subdomain called thyrsus within the
  top-level domain called com.  See also {big-endian}, sense 2.
  2. Said of a site, mailer, or routing program which knows how to
  handle domainist addresses.  3. Said of a person (esp. a site
  admin) who prefers domain addressing, supports a domainist mailer,
  or prosyletizes for domainist addressing and disdains {bang
  path}s.  This is now (1991) semi-obsolete, as most sites have
  converted.

Don't do that, then!: [from an old doctor's office joke about a
  patient with a trivial complaint] Stock response to a user
  complaint.  "When I type control-S, the whole system comes to a
  halt for thirty seconds."  "Don't do that, then!" (or "So don't
  do that!").  Compare {RTFM}.

dongle: /dong'gl/ n. 1. A security or {copy-protection} device
  for commercial microcomputer programs consisting of a serialized
  EPROM and some drivers in a D-25 connector shell, which must be
  connected to an I/O port of the computer while the program is run.
  Programs that use a dongle query the port at startup and at
  programmed intervals thereafter, and terminate if it does not
  respond with the dongle's programmed validation code.  Thus, users
  can make as many copies of the program as they want but must pay
  for each dongle.  The idea was clever, but it was initially a failure, as
  users disliked tying up a serial port this way.  Most dongles on
  the market today (1991) will pass data through the port and monitor
  for {magic} codes (and combinations of status lines) with minimal
  if any interference with devices further down the line --- this
  innovation was necessary to allow daisy-chained dongles for
  multiple pieces of software.  The devices are still not widely
  used, as the industry has moved away from copy-protection schemes
  in general.  2. By extension, any physical electronic key or
  transferrable ID required for a program to function.  See
  {dongle-disk}.

dongle-disk: /don'gl disk/ n. See {dongle}; a `dongle-disk'
  is a floppy disk with some coding that allows an application to
  identify it uniquely.  It can therefore be used as a {dongle}.
  Also called a `key disk'.

donuts: n.obs. A collective noun for any set of memory bits.  This is
  extremely archaic and may no longer be live jargon; it dates from the
  days of ferrite-{core} memories in which each bit was implemented by
  a doughnut-shaped magnetic flip-flop.

doorstop: n. Used to describe equipment that is non-functional and
  halfway expected to remain so, especially obsolete equipment kept
  around for political reasons or ostensibly as a backup.  "When we
  get another Wyse-50 in here, that ADM 3 will turn into a doorstop."
  Compare {boat anchor}.

dot file: [UNIX] n. A file which is not visible to normal
  directory-browsing tools (on UNIX, files named with a leading dot
  are, by convention, not normally presented in directory listings).
  Many programs define one or more dot files in which startup or
  configuration information may be optionally recorded; a user can
  customize the program's behavior by creating the appropriate file in
  the current or home directory.  See also {rc file}.

double bucky: adj. Using both the CTRL and META keys.  "The
  command to burn all LEDs is double bucky F."

  This term originated on the Stanford extended-ASCII keyboard, and
  was later taken up by users of the {space-cadet keyboard} at
  MIT.  A typical MIT comment was that the Stanford {bucky bits}
  (control and meta shifting keys) were nice, but there weren't
  enough of them; you could type only 512 different characters on a
  Stanford keyboard.  An obvious way to address this was simply to
  add more shifting keys, and this was eventually done; but a
  keyboard with that many shifting keys is hard on touch-typists, who
  don't like to move their hands away from the home position on the
  keyboard.  It was half-seriously suggested that the extra shifting
  keys be implemented as pedals; typing on such a keyboard would be
  very much like playing a full pipe organ.  This idea is mentioned
  in a parody of a very fine song by Jeffrey Moss called
  "Rubber Duckie", which was published in `The Sesame
  Street Songbook' (Simon and Schuster 1971, ISBN 671-21036-X).
  These lyrics were written on May 27, 1978, in celebration of the
  Stanford keyboard:

                       Double Bucky

       Double bucky, you're the one!
       You make my keyboard lots of fun.
           Double bucky, an additional bit or two:
       (Vo-vo-de-o!)
       Control and meta, side by side,
       Augmented ASCII, nine bits wide!
           Double bucky!  Half a thousand glyphs, plus a few!
               Oh,
               I sure wish that I
               Had a couple of
                   Bits more!
               Perhaps a
               Set of pedals to
               Make the number of
                   Bits four:
               Double double bucky!
       Double bucky, left and right
       OR'd together, outta sight!
           Double bucky, I'd like a whole word of
           Double bucky, I'm happy I heard of
           Double bucky, I'd like a whole word of you!

       --- The Great Quux (with apologies to Jeffrey Moss)

  [This, by the way, is an excellent example of computer {filk} --- ESR]

  See also {meta bit}, {cokebottle}, and {quadruple bucky}.

double DECkers: n. Used to describe married couples in which both
  partners work for Digital Equipment Corporation.

doubled sig: [USENET] n. A {sig block} that has been included
  twice in a {USENET} article or, less commonly, in an electronic
  mail message.  An article or message with a doubled sig can be
  caused by improperly configured software.  More often, however, it
  reveals the author's lack of experience in electronic
  communication.  See {BIFF}, {pseudo}.

down: 1. adj. Not operating.  "The up escalator is down" is
  considered a humorous thing to say, and "The elevator is down"
  always means "The elevator isn't working" and never refers to
  what floor the elevator is on.  With respect to computers, this
  usage has passed into the mainstream; the extension to other kinds
  of machine is still hackish.  2. `go down' vi. To stop
  functioning; usually said of the {system}.  The message from the
  {console} that every hacker hates to hear from the operator is
  "The system will go down in 5 minutes".  3. `take down',
  `bring down' vt. To deactivate purposely, usually for repair work
  or {PM}.  "I'm taking the system down to work on that bug in the
  tape drive."  Occasionally one hears the word `down' by itself
  used as a verb in this vt. sense.  See {crash}; oppose {up}.

download: vt. To transfer data or (esp.) code from a larger `host'
  system (esp. a {mainframe}) over a digital comm link to a smaller
  `client' system, esp. a microcomputer or specialized peripheral.
  Oppose {upload}.

  However, note that ground-to-space communications has its own usage
  rule for this term.  Space-to-earth transmission is always download
  and the reverse upload regardless of the relative size of the
  computers involved.  So far the in-space machines have invariably
  been smaller; thus the upload/download distinction has been
  reversed from its usual sense.

DP: /D-P/ n. 1. Data Processing.  Listed here because,
  according to hackers, use of the term marks one immediately as a
  {suit}.  See {DPer}.  2. Common abbrev for {Dissociated
  Press}.

DPB: /d*-pib'/ [from the PDP-10 instruction set] vt. To plop
  something down in the middle.  Usage: silly.  "DPB
  yourself into that couch there."  The connotation would be that
  the couch is full except for one slot just big enough for you to
  sit in.  DPB means `DePosit Byte', and was the name of a PDP-10
  instruction that inserts some bits into the middle of some other
  bits.  This usage has been kept alive by the Common LISP function
  of the same name.

DPer: /dee-pee-er/ n. Data Processor.  Hackers are absolutely
  amazed that {suit}s use this term self-referentially.
  "*Computers* process data, not people!"  See {DP}.

dragon: n. [MIT] A program similar to a {daemon}, except that it
  is not invoked at all, but is instead used by the system to perform
  various secondary tasks.  A typical example would be an accounting
  program, which keeps track of who is logged in, accumulates
  load-average statistics, etc.  Under ITS, many terminals displayed
  a list of people logged in, where they were, what they were
  running, etc., along with some random picture (such as a unicorn,
  Snoopy, or the Enterprise), which was generated by the `name
  dragon'.  Usage: rare outside MIT --- under UNIX and most other OSes
  this would be called a `background demon' or {daemon}.  The
  best-known UNIX example of a dragon is `cron(1)'.  At SAIL,
  they called this sort of thing a `phantom'.

Dragon Book: n. The classic text `Compilers: Principles,
  Techniques and Tools', by Alfred V. Aho, Ravi Sethi, and Jeffrey D.
  Ullman (Addison-Wesley 1986; ISBN 0-201-10088-6), so called because
  of the cover design featuring a dragon labeled `complexity of
  compiler design' and a knight bearing the lance `LALR parser
  generator' among his other trappings.  This one is more
  specifically known as the `Red Dragon Book' (1986); an earlier
  edition, sans Sethi and titled `Principles Of Compiler Design'
  (Alfred V. Aho and Jeffrey D. Ullman; Addison-Wesley, 1977; ISBN
  0-201-00022-9), was the `Green Dragon Book' (1977).  (Also `New
  Dragon Book', `Old Dragon Book'.)  The horsed knight and the
  Green Dragon were warily eying each other at a distance; now the
  knight is typing (wearing gauntlets!) at a terminal showing a
  video-game representation of the Red Dragon's head while the rest
  of the beast extends back in normal space.  See also {{book
  titles}}.

drain: [IBM] v. Syn. for {flush} (sense 2).  Has a connotation
  of finality about it; one speaks of draining a device before taking
  it offline.

dread high-bit disease: n. A condition endemic to PRIME (a.k.a.
  PR1ME) minicomputers that results in all the characters having
  their high (0x80) bit ON rather than OFF.  This of course makes
  transporting files to other systems much more difficult, not to
  mention talking to true 8-bit devices.  It is reported that
  PRIME adopted the reversed-8-bit convention in order to save
  25 cents per serial line per machine.  This probably qualifies as one
  of the most {cretinous} design tradeoffs ever made.  See {meta
  bit}.   A few other machines (including the Atari 800) have exhibited
  similar brain damage.

DRECNET: /drek'net/ [from Yiddish/German `dreck', meaning
  dirt] n. Deliberate distortion of DECNET, a networking protocol
  used in the {VMS} community.  So called because DEC helped write
  the Ethernet specification and then (either stupidly or as a
  malignant customer-control tactic) violated that spec in the design
  of DRECNET in a way that made it incompatible.  See also
  {connector conspiracy}.

driver: n. 1. The {main loop} of an event-processing program;
  the code that gets commands and dispatches them for execution.
  2. [techspeak] In `device driver', code designed to handle a
  particular peripheral device such as a magnetic disk or tape unit.
  3. In the TeX   general, `driver' also means a program that translates some
  device-independent or other common format to something a real
  device can actually understand.

droid: n. A person (esp. a low-level bureaucrat or
  service-business employee) exhibiting most of the following
  characteristics: (a) na"ive trust in the wisdom of the parent
  organization or `the system'; (b) a propensity to believe
  obvious nonsense emitted by authority figures (or computers!);
  blind faith; (c) a rule-governed mentality, one unwilling or unable
  to look beyond the `letter of the law' in exceptional
  situations; and (d) no interest in fixing that which is broken; an
  "It's not my job, man" attitude.

  Typical droid positions include supermarket checkout assistant and
  bank clerk; the syndrome is also endemic in low-level government
  employees.  The implication is that the rules and official
  procedures constitute software that the droid is executing.  This
  becomes a problem when the software has not been properly debugged.
  The term `droid mentality' is also used to describe the mindset
  behind this behavior. Compare {suit}, {marketroid}; see
  {-oid}.

drool-proof paper: n. Documentation that has been obsessively {dumbed
  down}, to the point where only a {cretin} could bear to read it, is
  said to have succumbed to the `drool-proof paper syndrome' or to
  have been `written on drool-proof paper'.  For example, this is
  an actual quote from Apple's LaserWriter manual: "Do not expose
  your LaserWriter to open fire or flame."

drop on the floor: vt. To react to an error condition by silently
  discarding messages or other valuable data.  "The gateway
  ran out of memory, so it just started dropping packets on the
  floor."  Also frequently used of faulty mail and netnews relay
  sites that lose messages.  See also {black hole}, {bit bucket}.

drop-ins: [prob. by analogy with {drop-outs}] n. Spurious
  characters appearing on a terminal or console as a result of line noise or
  a system malfunction of some sort.  Esp. used when these are
  interspersed with one's own typed input.  Compare {drop-outs}.

drop-outs: n. 1. A variety of `power glitch' (see {glitch});
  momentary 0 voltage on the electrical mains.  2. Missing characters
  in typed input due to software malfunction or system saturation
  (this can happen under UNIX when a bad connection to a modem swamps
  the processor with spurious character interrupts).  3. Mental
  glitches; used as a way of describing those occasions when the mind
  just seems to shut down for a couple of beats.  See {glitch},
  {fried}.

drugged: adj. (also `on drugs') 1. Conspicuously stupid,
  heading toward {brain-damaged}.  Often accompanied by a
  pantomime of toking a joint (but see appendix B).  2. Of hardware,
  very slow relative to normal performance.

drunk mouse syndrome: n. A malady exhibited by the mouse pointing
  device of some computers.  The typical symptom is for the mouse
  cursor on the screen to move in random directions and not in sync
  with the motion of the actual mouse.  Can usually be corrected by
  unplugging the mouse and plugging it back again.  Another
  recommended fix for optical mice is to rotate your mouse pad
  90 degrees.

  At Xerox PARC in the 1970s, most people kept a can of copier
  cleaner (isopropyl alcohol) at their desks.  When the steel ball on
  the mouse had picked up enough {cruft} to be unreliable, the mouse
  was doused in cleaner, which restored it for a while.  However,
  this operation left a fine residue that accelerated the accumulation
  of cruft, so the dousings became more and more frequent.  Finally,
  the mouse was declared `alcoholic' and sent to the clinic to be
  dried out in a CFC ultrasonic bath.

dumbass attack: /duhm'as *-tak'/ [Purdue] n. Notional cause of a
  novice's mistake made by the experienced, especially one made while
  running as root under UNIX, e.g., typing `rm -r *' or
  `mkfs' on a mounted file system.  Compare {adger}.

dumbed down: adj. Simplified, with a strong connotation of
  *over*simplified.  Often, a {marketroid} will insist that the
  interfaces and documentation of software be dumbed down after the
  designer has burned untold gallons of midnight oil making it
  smart.  This creates friction.  See {user-friendly}.

dump: n. 1. An undigested and voluminous mass of information about a
  problem or the state of a system, especially one routed to the
  slowest available output device (compare {core dump}), and most
  especially one consisting of hex or octal {runes} describing the
  byte-by-byte state of memory, mass storage, or some file.  In {elder
  days}, debugging was generally done by `groveling over' a dump
  (see {grovel}); increasing use of high-level languages and
  interactive debuggers has made this uncommon, and the term `dump'
  now has a faintly archaic flavor.  2. A backup.  This usage is
  typical only at large timesharing installations.

dup killer: /d[y]oop kill'r/ [FidoNet] n. Software that is
  supposed to detect and delete duplicates of a message that may
  have reached the FidoNet system via different routes.

dup loop: /d[y]oop loop/ (also `dupe loop') [FidoNet] n. An
  incorrectly configured system or network gateway may propagate
  duplicate messages on one or more {echo}es, with different
  identification information that renders {dup killer}s
  ineffective.  If such a duplicate message eventually reaches a
  system through which it has already passed (with the original
  identification information), all systems passed on the way back to
  that system are said to be involved in a {dup loop}.

dusty deck: n. Old software (especially applications) which one is
  obliged to remain compatible with (or to maintain).  The term
  implies that the software in question is a holdover from card-punch
  days.  Used esp. when referring to old scientific and
  {number-crunching} software, much of which was written in FORTRAN
  and very poorly documented but is believed to be too expensive to
  replace.  See {fossil}.

DWIM: /dwim/ [acronym, `Do What I Mean'] 1. adj. Able to guess, sometimes
  even correctly, the result intended when bogus input was provided.
  2. n.,obs. The BBNLISP/INTERLISP function that attempted to
  accomplish this feat by correcting many of the more common errors.
  See {hairy}.  3. Occasionally, an interjection hurled at a
  balky computer, esp. when one senses one might be tripping over
  legalisms (see {legalese}).

  Warren Teitelman originally wrote DWIM to fix his typos and
  spelling errors, so it was somewhat idiosyncratic to his style, and
  would often make hash of anyone else's typos if they were
  stylistically different.  This led a number of victims of DWIM to
  claim the acronym stood for `Damn Warren's Infernal Machine!'.

  In one notorious incident, Warren added a DWIM feature to the
  command interpreter used at Xerox PARC.  One day another hacker
  there typed `delete *$' to free up some disk space.  (The editor
  there named backup files by appending `$' to the original file
  name, so he was trying to delete any backup files left over from
  old editing sessions.)  It happened that there weren't any editor
  backup files, so DWIM helpfully reported `*$ not found, assuming
  you meant 'delete *'.'  It then started to delete all the files on
  the disk!  The hacker managed to stop it with a {Vulcan nerve
  pinch} after only a half dozen or so files were lost.

  The hacker later said he had been sorely tempted to go to Warren's
  office, tie Warren down in his chair in front of his workstation,
  and then type `delete *$' twice.

  DWIM is often suggested in jest as a desired feature for a complex
  program; it is also occasionally described as the single
  instruction the ideal computer would have.  Back when proofs of
  program correctness were in vogue, there were also jokes about
  `DWIMC' (Do What I Mean, Correctly).  A related term, more often
  seen as a verb, is DTRT (Do The Right Thing); see {Right Thing}.

dynner: /din'r/ 32 bits, by analogy with {nybble} and
  {{byte}}.  Usage: rare and extremely silly.  See also {playte},
  {tayste}, {crumb}.

= E =
=====

earthquake: [IBM] n. The ultimate real-world shock test for
  computer hardware.  Hackish sources at IBM deny the rumor that the
  Bay Area quake of 1989 was initiated by the company to test
  quality-assurance procedures at its California plants.

Easter egg: n. 1. A message hidden in the object code of a program
  as a joke, intended to be found by persons disassembling or
  browsing the code.  2. A message, graphic, or sound effect emitted
  by a program (or, on a PC, the BIOS ROM) in response to some
  undocumented set of commands or keystrokes, intended as a joke or
  to display program credits.  One well-known early Easter egg found
  in a couple of OSes caused them to respond to the command
  `make love' with `not war?'.  Many personal computers
  have much more elaborate eggs hidden in ROM, including lists of the
  developers' names, political exhortations, snatches of music, and
  (in one case) graphics images of the entire development team.

Easter egging: [IBM] n. The act of replacing unrelated parts more or
  less at random in hopes that a malfunction will go away.  Hackers
  consider this the normal operating mode of {field circus} techs and
  do not love them for it.  Compare {shotgun debugging}.

eat flaming death: imp. A construction popularized among hackers by
  the infamous {CPU Wars} comic; supposed to derive from a famously
  turgid line in a WWII-era anti-Nazi propaganda comic that ran
  "Eat flaming death, non-Aryan mongrels!" or something of the sort
  (however, it is also reported that the Firesign Theater's
  1975 album "In The Next World, You're On Your Own" included the
  phrase "Eat flaming death, fascist media pigs"; this may have been
  an influence).  Used in humorously overblown expressions of
  hostility. "Eat flaming death, {{EBCDIC}} users!"

EBCDIC:: /eb's*-dik/, /eb'see`dik/, or /eb'k*-dik/ [acronym,
  Extended Binary Coded Decimal Interchange Code] n. An alleged
  character set used on IBM {dinosaur}s.  It exists in at least six
  mutually incompatible versions, all featuring such delights as
  non-contiguous letter sequences and the absence of several ASCII
  punctuation characters fairly important for modern computer
  languages (exactly which characters are absent varies according to
  which version of EBCDIC you're looking at).  IBM adapted EBCDIC
  from {{punched card}} code in the early 1960s and promulgated it
  as a customer-control tactic (see {connector conspiracy}),
  spurning the already established ASCII standard.  Today, IBM claims
  to be an open-systems company, but IBM's own description of the
  EBCDIC variants and how to convert between them is still internally
  classified top-secret, burn-before-reading.  Hackers blanch at the
  very *name* of EBCDIC and consider it a manifestation of
  purest {evil}.  See also {fear and loathing}.

echo: [FidoNet] n. A {topic group} on {FidoNet}'s echomail
  system.  Compare {newsgroup}.

eighty-column mind: [IBM] n. The sort said to be possessed by
  persons for whom the transition from {punched card} to tape was
  traumatic (nobody has dared tell them about disks yet).  It is said
  that these people, including (according to an old joke) the founder
  of IBM, will be buried `face down, 9-edge first' (the 9-edge being
  the bottom of the card).  This directive is inscribed on IBM's
  1422 and 1602 card readers and is referenced in a famous bit of
  doggerel called "The Last Bug", the climactic lines of which
  are as follows:

       He died at the console
       Of hunger and thirst.
       Next day he was buried,
       Face down, 9-edge first.

  The eighty-column mind is thought by most hackers to dominate IBM's
  customer base and its thinking.  See {IBM}, {fear and
  loathing}, {card walloper}.

El Camino Bignum: /el' k*-mee'noh big'nuhm/ n. The road
  mundanely called El Camino Real, a road through the San Francisco
  peninsula that originally extended all the way down to Mexico City
  and many portions of which are still intact.  Navigation on the San
  Francisco peninsula is usually done relative to El Camino Real,
  which defines {logical} north and south even though it isn't
  really north-south many places.  El Camino Real runs right past
  Stanford University and so is familiar to hackers.

  The Spanish word `real' (which has two syllables: /ray-ahl'/)
  means `royal'; El Camino Real is `the royal road'.  In the FORTRAN
  language, a `real' quantity is a number typically precise to 7
  significant digits, and a `double precision' quantity is a larger
  floating-point number, precise to perhaps fourteen significant
  digits (other languages have similar `real' types).

  When a hacker from MIT visited Stanford in 1976, he remarked what a
  long road El Camino Real was.  Making a pun on `real', he started
  calling it `El Camino Double Precision' --- but when the hacker
  was told that the road was hundreds of miles long, he renamed it
  `El Camino Bignum', and that name has stuck.  (See {bignum}.)

elder days: n. The heroic age of hackerdom (roughly, pre-1980); the
  era of the {PDP-10}, {TECO}, {{ITS}}, and the ARPANET.  This
  term has been rather consciously adopted from J. R. R. Tolkien's
  fantasy epic `The Lord of the Rings'.  Compare {Iron Age};
  see also {elvish}.

elegant: [from mathematical usage] adj. Combining simplicity, power,
  and a certain ineffable grace of design.  Higher praise than
  `clever', `winning', or even {cuspy}.

elephantine: adj. Used of programs or systems that are both
  conspicuous {hog}s (owing perhaps to poor design founded on
  {brute force and ignorance}) and exceedingly {hairy} in source
  form.  An elephantine program may be functional and even friendly,
  but (as in the old joke about being in bed with an elephant) it's
  tough to have around all the same (and, like a pachyderm, difficult
  to maintain).  In extreme cases, hackers have been known to make
  trumpeting sounds or perform expressive proboscatory mime at the
  mention of the offending program.  Usage: semi-humorous.  Compare
  `has the elephant nature' and the somewhat more pejorative
  {monstrosity}.  See also {second-system effect} and
  {baroque}.

elevator controller: n. Another archetypal dumb embedded-systems
  application, like {toaster} (which superseded it).  During one
  period (1983--84) in the deliberations of ANSI X3J11 (the
  C standardization committee) this was the canonical example of a
  really stupid, memory-limited computation environment.  "You can't
  require `printf(3)' to be part of the default runtime library
  --- what if you're targeting an elevator controller?"  Elevator
  controllers became important rhetorical weapons on both sides of
  several {holy wars}.

ELIZA effect: /*-li:'z* *-fekt'/ [AI community] n. The tendency of
  humans to attach associations to terms from prior experience.
  For example, there is nothing magic about the symbol `+' that
  makes it well-suited to indicate addition; it's just that people
  associate it with addition.  Using `+' or `plus' to mean addition
  in a computer language is taking advantage of the ELIZA effect.

  This term comes from the famous ELIZA program, which simulated a
  Rogerian psychoanalyst by rephrasing many of the patient's
  statements as questions and posing them to the patient.  It worked
  by simple pattern recognition and substitution of key words into
  canned phrases.  It was so convincing, however, that there are many
  anecdotes about people becoming very emotionally caught up in
  dealing with ELIZA.  All this was due to people's tendency to
  attach to words meanings which the computer never put there.  The
  ELIZA effect is a {Good Thing} when writing a programming
  language, but it can blind you to serious shortcomings when
  analyzing an Artificial Intelligence system.  Compare
  {ad-hockery}; see also {AI-complete}.

elvish: n. 1. The Tengwar of Feanor, a table of letterforms
  resembling the beautiful Celtic half-uncial hand of the `Book
  of Kells'.  Invented and described by J. R. R. Tolkien
  in `The Lord of The Rings' as an orthography for his fictional
  `elvish' languages, this system (which is both visually and
  phonetically elegant) has long fascinated hackers (who tend to be
  interested by artificial languages in general).  It is traditional
  for graphics printers, plotters, window systems, and the like to
  support a Feanorian typeface as one of their demo items.  See also
  {elder days}.  2. By extension, any odd or unreadable typeface
  produced by a graphics device.  3. The typeface mundanely called
  `B"ocklin', an art-decoish display font.

EMACS: /ee'maks/ [from Editing MACroS] n. The ne plus ultra of
  hacker editors, a program editor with an entire LISP system inside
  it.  It was originally written by Richard Stallman in {TECO}
  under {{ITS}} at the MIT AI lab, but the most widely used versions
  now run under UNIX.  It includes facilities to run compilation
  subprocesses and send and receive mail; many hackers spend up to
  80% of their {tube time} inside it.

  Some versions running under window managers iconify as an
  overflowing kitchen sink, perhaps to suggest the one feature the
  editor does not (yet) include.  Indeed, some hackers find EMACS too
  heavyweight and {baroque} for their taste, and expand the name as
  `Escape Meta Alt Control Shift' to spoof its heavy reliance on
  keystrokes decorated with {bucky bits}.  Other spoof expansions
  include `Eight Megabytes And Constantly Swapping', `Eventually
  `malloc()'s All Computer Storage', and `EMACS Makes A Computer
  Slow' (see {{recursive acronym}}).  See also {vi}.

email: /ee'mayl/ 1. n. Electronic mail automatically passed
  through computer networks and/or via modems over common-carrier
  lines.  Contrast {snail-mail}, {paper-net}, {voice-net}.  See
  {network address}.  2. vt. To send electronic mail.

  Oddly enough, the word `emailed' is actually listed in the OED; it
  means "embossed (with a raised pattern) or arranged in a net work".
  A use from 1480 is given. The word is derived from French
  `emmailleure', network.

emoticon: /ee-moh'ti-kon/ n. An ASCII glyph used to indicate an
  emotional state in email or news.  Hundreds have been proposed, but
  only a few are in common use.  These include:

    :-)
         `smiley face' (for humor, laughter, friendliness,
         occasionally sarcasm)

    :-(
         `frowney face' (for sadness, anger, or upset)

    ;-)
         `half-smiley' ({ha ha only serious});
         also known as `semi-smiley' or `winkey face'.

    :-/
         `wry face'

  (These may become more comprehensible if you tilt your head
  sideways, to the left.)

  The first 2 listed are by far the most frequently encountered.
  Hyphenless forms of them are common on CompuServe, GEnie, and BIX;
  see also {bixie}.  On {USENET}, `smiley' is often used as a
  generic term synonymous with {emoticon}, as well as specifically
  for the happy-face emoticon.

  It appears that the emoticon was invented by one Scott Fahlman on
  the CMU {bboard} systems around 1980.  He later wrote: "I wish I
  had saved the original post, or at least recorded the date for
  posterity, but I had no idea that I was starting something that
  would soon pollute all the world's communication channels."  [GLS
  confirms that he remembers this original posting].

  Note for the {newbie}: Overuse of the smiley is a mark of
  loserhood!  More than one per paragraph is a fairly sure sign that
  you've gone over the line.

empire: n. Any of a family of military simulations derived from a
  game written by Peter Langston many years ago.  There are five or six
  multi-player variants of varying degrees of sophistication, and one
  single-player version implemented for both UNIX and VMS; the latter is
  even available as MS-DOS freeware.  All are notoriously addictive.

engine: n. 1. A piece of hardware that encapsulates some function
  but can't be used without some kind of {front end}.  Today we
  have, especially, `print engine': the guts of a laser printer.
  2. An analogous piece of software; notionally, one that does a lot
  of noisy crunching, such as a `database engine'.

  The hackish senses of `engine' are actually close to its original,
  pre-Industrial-Revolution sense of a skill, clever device, or
  instrument (the word is cognate to `ingenuity').  This sense had
  not been completely eclipsed by the modern connotation of
  power-transducing machinery in Charles Babbage's time, which
  explains why he named the stored-program computer that
  he designed in 1844 the `Analytical Engine'.

English: 1. n.,obs. The source code for a program, which may be in
  any language, as opposed to the linkable or executable binary
  produced from it by a compiler.  The idea behind the term is that
  to a real hacker, a program written in his favorite programming
  language is at least as readable as English.  Usage: used mostly by
  old-time hackers, though recognizable in context.  2. The official
  name of the database language used by the Pick Operating System,
  actually a sort of crufty interpreted BASIC with delusions of
  grandeur.  The name permits {marketroid}s to say "Yes, and you
  can program our computers in English!" to ignorant {suit}s
  without quite running afoul of the truth-in-advertising laws.

enhancement: n. {Marketroid}-speak for a bug {fix}.  This abuse
  of language is a popular and time-tested way to turn incompetence
  into increased revenue.  A hacker being ironic would instead call
  the fix a {feature} --- or perhaps save some effort by declaring
  the bug itself to be a feature.

ENQ: /enkw/ or /enk/ [from the ASCII mnemonic ENQuire for
  0000101] An on-line convention for querying someone's availability.
  After opening a {talk mode} connection to someone apparently in
  heavy hack mode, one might type `SYN SYN ENQ?' (the SYNs
  representing notional synchronization bytes), and expect a return
  of {ACK} or {NAK} depending on whether or not the person felt
  interruptible.  Compare {ping}, {finger}, and the usage of
  `FOO?' listed under {talk mode}.

EOF: /E-O-F/ [acronym, `End Of File'] n. 1. [techspeak] Refers
  esp. to whatever {out-of-band} value is returned by
  C's sequential character-input functions (and their equivalents in
  other environments) when end of file has been reached.  This value
  is -1 under C libraries postdating V6 UNIX, but was
  originally 0.  2. Used by extension in non-computer contexts when a
  human is doing something that can be modeled as a sequential read
  and can't go further.  "Yeah, I looked for a list of 360 mnemonics
  to post as a joke, but I hit EOF pretty fast; all the library had
  was a {JCL} manual."  See also {EOL}.

EOL: /E-O-L/ [End Of Line] n. Syn. for {newline}, derived
  perhaps from the original CDC6600 Pascal.  Now rare, but widely
  recognized and occasionally used for brevity.  Used in the
  example entry under {BNF}.  See also {EOF}.

EOU: /E-O-U/ n. The mnemonic of a mythical ASCII control
  character (End Of User) that could make an ASR-33 Teletype explode
  on receipt.  This parodied the numerous obscure delimiter and
  control characters left in ASCII from the days when it was
  associated more with wire-service teletypes than computers (e.g.,
  FS, GS, RS, US, EM, SUB, ETX, and esp. EOT).  It is worth
  remembering that ASR-33s were big, noisy mechanical beasts with a
  lot of clattering parts; the notion that one might explode was
  nowhere near as ridiculous as it might seem to someone sitting in
  front of a {tube} or flatscreen today.

epoch: [UNIX: prob. from astronomical timekeeping] n. The time and
  date corresponding to 0 in an operating system's clock and
  timestamp values.  Under most UNIX versions the epoch is 00:00:00
  GMT, January 1, 1970.  System time is measured in seconds or
  {tick}s past the epoch.  Weird problems may ensue when the clock
  wraps around (see {wrap around}), which is not necessarily a
  rare event; on systems counting 10 ticks per second, a signed
  32-bit count of ticks is good only for 6.8 years.  The
  1-tick-per-second clock of UNIX is good only until January 18,
  2038, assuming word lengths don't increase by then.  See also
  {wall time}.

epsilon: [see {delta}] 1. n. A small quantity of anything.  "The
  cost is epsilon."  2. adj. Very small, negligible; less than
  {marginal}.  "We can get this feature for epsilon cost."
  3. `within epsilon of': close enough to be indistinguishable for
  all practical purposes.  This is even closer than being `within
  delta of'.  "That's not what I asked for, but it's within
  epsilon of what I wanted."  Alternatively, it may mean not close
  enough, but very little is required to get it there: "My program
  is within epsilon of working."

epsilon squared: n. A quantity even smaller than {epsilon}, as
  small in comparison to epsilon as epsilon is to something normal;
  completely negligible.  If you buy a supercomputer for a million
  dollars, the cost of the thousand-dollar terminal to go with it is
  {epsilon}, and the cost of the ten-dollar cable to connect them
  is epsilon squared.  Compare {lost in the underflow}, {lost
  in the noise}.

era, the: Syn. {epoch}.  Webster's Unabridged makes these words
  almost synonymous, but `era' usually connotes a span of time rather
  than a point in time.  The {epoch} usage is recommended.

Eric Conspiracy: n. A shadowy group of mustachioed hackers named
  Eric first pinpointed as a sinister conspiracy by an infamous
  talk.bizarre posting ca. 1986; this was doubtless influenced by the
  numerous `Eric' jokes in the Monty Python oeuvre.  There do indeed
  seem to be considerably more mustachioed Erics in hackerdom than
  the frequency of these three traits can account for unless they are
  correlated in some arcane way.  Well-known examples include Eric
  Allman (he of the `Allman style' described under {indent style})
  and Erik Fair (co-author of NNTP); your editor has heard from about
  fourteen others by email, and the organization line `Eric
  Conspiracy Secret Laboratories' now emanates regularly from more
  than one site.

Eris: /e'ris/ n. The Greek goddess of Chaos, Discord, Confusion,
  and Things You Know Not Of; her name was latinized to Discordia and
  she was worshiped by that name in Rome.  Not a very friendly deity
  in the Classical original, she was reinvented as a more benign
  personification of creative anarchy starting in 1959 by the
  adherents of {Discordianism} and has since been a semi-serious
  subject of veneration in several `fringe' cultures, including
  hackerdom.  See {Discordianism}, {Church of the SubGenius}.

erotics: /ee-ro'tiks/ n. [Helsinki University of Technology,
  Finland] n. English-language university slang for electronics.
  Often used by hackers in Helsinki, maybe because good electronics
  excites them and makes them warm.

essentials: n. Things necessary to maintain a productive and secure
  hacking environment.  "A jug of wine, a loaf of bread, a
  20-megahertz 80386 box with 8 meg of core and a 300-megabyte disk
  supporting full UNIX with source and X windows and EMACS and UUCP
  via a 'blazer to a friendly Internet site, and thou."

evil: adj. As used by hackers, implies that some system, program,
  person, or institution is sufficiently maldesigned as to be not
  worth the bother of dealing with.  Unlike the adjectives in the
  {cretinous}/{losing}/{brain-damaged} series, `evil' does not
  imply incompetence or bad design, but rather a set of goals or
  design criteria fatally incompatible with the speaker's.  This is
  more an esthetic and engineering judgment than a moral one in the
  mainstream sense.  "We thought about adding a {Blue Glue}
  interface but decided it was too evil to deal with."  "{TECO}
  is neat, but it can be pretty evil if you're prone to typos."
  Often pronounced with the first syllable lengthened, as /eeee'vil/.

exa-: /ek's*/ [SI] pref. See {{quantifiers}}.

examining the entrails: n. The process of {grovel}ling through a
  core dump or hex image in the attempt to discover the bug that
  brought a program or system down.  Compare {runes},
  {incantation}, {black art}, {desk check}.

EXCH: /eks'ch*/ or /eksch/ vt. To exchange two things, each for the
  other; to swap places.  If you point to two people sitting down and
  say "Exch!", you are asking them to trade places.  EXCH,
  meaning EXCHange, was originally the name of a PDP-10 instruction
  that exchanged the contents of a register and a memory location.
  Many newer hackers tend to be thinking instead of the PostScript
  exchange operator (which is usually written in lowercase).

excl: /eks'kl/ n. Abbreviation for `exclamation point'.  See
  {bang}, {shriek}, {{ASCII}}.

EXE: /eks'ee/ or /eek'see/ or /E-X-E/ n. An executable
  binary file.  Some operating systems (notably MS-DOS, VMS, and
  TWENEX) use the extension .EXE to mark such files.  This usage is
  also occasionally found among UNIX programmers even though UNIX
  executables don't have any required suffix.

exec: /eg-zek'/ vt.,n.  1. [UNIX: from `execute'] Synonym for
  {chain}, derives from the `exec(2)' call.  2. [from
  `executive'] obs. The command interpreter for an {OS} (see
  {shell}); term esp. used around mainframes, and prob. derived from
  UNIVAC's archaic EXEC 2 and EXEC 8 operating systems.  3. At IBM,
  the equivalent of a shell command file (among VM/CMS users).

  The mainstream `exec' as an abbreviation for (human) executive is
  *not* used.  To a hacker, an `exec' is a always a program,
  never a person.

exercise, left as an: [from technical books] Used to complete a
  proof when one doesn't mind a {handwave}, or to avoid one
  entirely.  The complete phrase is: "The proof (or the rest) is left as
  an exercise for the reader."  This comment *has* occasionally
  been attached to unsolved research problems by authors possessed of
  either an evil sense of humor or a vast faith in the capabilities
  of their audiences.

eyeball search: n. To look for something in a mass of code or data
  with one's own native optical sensors, as opposed to using some
  sort of pattern matching software like {grep} or any other
  automated search tool.  Also called a {vgrep}; compare
  {vdiff}, {desk check}.

= F =
=====

fab: /fab/ [from `fabricate'] v. 1. To produce chips from a
  design that may have been created by someone at another company.
  Fabbing chips based on the designs of others is the activity of a
  {silicon foundry}.  To a hacker, `fab' is practically never short
  for `fabulous'.  2. `fab line': the production system
  (lithography, diffusion, etching, etc.) for chips at a chip
  manufacturer.  Different `fab lines' are run with different
  process parameters, die sizes, or technologies, or simply to
  provide more manufacturing volume.

face time: n. Time spent interacting with somebody face-to-face (as
  opposed to via electronic links).  "Oh, yeah, I spent some face
  time with him at the last Usenix."

factor: n. See {coefficient}.

fall over: [IBM] vi. Yet another synonym for {crash} or {lose}.
  `Fall over hard' equates to {crash and burn}.

fall through: v. (n. `fallthrough', var. `fall-through') 1. To
  exit a loop by exhaustion, i.e., by having fulfilled its exit
  condition rather than via a break or exception condition that exits
  from the middle of it.  This usage appears to be *really* old,
  dating from the 1940s and 1950s.  2. To fail a test that would have
  passed control to a subroutine or some other distant portion of code.
  3. In C, `fall-through' occurs when the flow of execution in a
  switch statement reaches a `case' label other than by jumping
  there from the switch header, passing a point where one would
  normally expect to find a `break'.  A trivial example:

    switch (color)
    {
    case GREEN:
       do_green();
       break;
    case PINK:
       do_pink();
       /* FALL THROUGH */
    case RED:
       do_red();
       break;
    default:
       do_blue();
       break;
    }

  The variant spelling `/* FALL THRU */' is also common.

  The effect of this code is to `do_green()' when color is
  `GREEN', `do_red()' when color is `RED',
  `do_blue()' on any other color other than `PINK', and
  (and this is the important part) `do_pink()' *and then*
  `do_red()' when color is `PINK'.  Fall-through is
  {considered harmful} by some, though there are contexts (such as
  the coding of state machines) in which it is natural; it is
  generally considered good practice to include a comment
  highlighting the fall-through where one would normally expect a
  break.

fandango on core: [UNIX/C hackers, from the Mexican dance] n.
  In C, a wild pointer that runs out of bounds, causing a {core
  dump}, or corrupts the `malloc(3)' {arena} in such a way as
  to cause mysterious failures later on, is sometimes said to have
  `done a fandango on core'.  On low-end personal machines without an
  MMU, this can corrupt the OS itself, causing massive lossage.
  Other frenetic dances such as the rhumba, cha-cha, or watusi, may
  be substituted.  See {aliasing bug}, {precedence lossage},
  {smash the stack}, {memory leak}, {overrun screw},
  {core}.

FAQ list: /F-A-Q list/ [USENET] n. A compendium of accumulated
  lore, posted periodically to high-volume newsgroups in an attempt
  to forestall Frequently Asked Questions.  This lexicon itself
  serves as a good example of a collection of one kind of lore,
  although it is far too big for a regular posting.  Examples: "What
  is the proper type of NULL?"  and "What's that funny name for
  the `#' character?" are both Frequently Asked Questions.
  Several extant FAQ lists do (or should) make reference to the
  Jargon File (the on-line version of this lexicon).

FAQL: /fa'kl/ n. Syn. {FAQ list}.

farming: [Adelaide University, Australia] n. What the heads of a
  disk drive are said to do when they plow little furrows in the
  magnetic media.  Associated with a {crash}.  Typically used as
  follows: "Oh no, the machine has just crashed; I hope the hard
  drive hasn't gone {farming} again."

fascist: adj. 1. Said of a computer system with excessive or
  annoying security barriers, usage limits, or access policies.  The
  implication is that said policies are preventing hackers from
  getting interesting work done.  The variant `fascistic' seems
  to have been preferred at MIT, poss. by analogy with
  `touristic' (see {tourist}).  2. In the design of languages
  and other software tools, `the fascist alternative' is the most
  restrictive and structured way of capturing a particular function;
  the implication is that this may be desirable in order to simplify
  the implementation or provide tighter error checking.  Compare
  {bondage-and-discipline language}, but that term is global rather
  than local.

faulty: adj. Non-functional; buggy.  Same denotation as
  {bletcherous}, {losing}, q.v., but the connotation is much
  milder.

fd leak: /ef dee leek/ n. A kind of programming bug analogous to a
  {core leak}, in which a program fails to close file descriptors
  (`fd's) after file operations are completed, and thus eventually
  runs out of them.  See {leak}.

fear and loathing: [from Hunter Thompson] n. A state inspired by the
  prospect of dealing with certain real-world systems and standards
  that are totally {brain-damaged} but ubiquitous --- Intel 8086s,
  or {COBOL}, or {{EBCDIC}}, or any {IBM} machine except the
  Rios (a.k.a.  the RS/6000).  "Ack!  They want PCs to be able to
  talk to the AI machine.  Fear and loathing time!"

feature: n. 1. A good property or behavior (as of a program).
  Whether it was intended or not is immaterial.  2. An intended
  property or behavior (as of a program).  Whether it is good or not
  is immaterial (but if bad, it is also a {misfeature}).  3. A
  surprising property or behavior; in particular, one that is
  purposely inconsistent because it works better that way --- such an
  inconsistency is therefore a {feature} and not a {bug}.  This
  kind of feature is sometimes called a {miswart}; see that entry
  for a classic example.  4. A property or behavior that is
  gratuitous or unnecessary, though perhaps also impressive or cute.
  For example, one feature of Common LISP's `format' function is
  the ability to print numbers in two different Roman-numeral formats
  (see {bells, whistles, and gongs}).  5. A property or behavior
  that was put in to help someone else but that happens to be in your
  way.  6. A bug that has been documented.  To call something a
  feature sometimes means the author of the program did not consider
  the particular case, and that the program responded in a way that was
  unexpected but not strictly incorrect.  A standard joke is that a
  bug can be turned into a {feature} simply by documenting it
  (then theoretically no one can complain about it because it's in
  the manual), or even by simply declaring it to be good.  "That's
  not a bug, that's a feature!" is a common catchphrase.  See also
  {feetch feetch}, {creeping featurism}, {wart}, {green
  lightning}.

  The relationship among bugs, features, misfeatures, warts, and
  miswarts might be clarified by the following hypothetical exchange
  between two hackers on an airliner:

  A: "This seat doesn't recline."

  B: "That's not a bug, that's a feature.  There is an emergency
  exit door built around the window behind you, and the route has to
  be kept clear."

  A: "Oh.  Then it's a misfeature; they should have increased the
  spacing between rows here."

  B: "Yes.  But if they'd increased spacing in only one section it
  would have been a wart --- they would've had to make
  nonstandard-length ceiling panels to fit over the displaced
  seats."

  A: "A miswart, actually.  If they increased spacing throughout
  they'd lose several rows and a chunk out of the profit margin.  So
  unequal spacing would actually be the Right Thing."

  B: "Indeed."

  {Undocumented feature} is a common, allegedly humorous euphemism
  for a {bug}.

feature creature: [poss. fr. slang `creature feature' for a horror
  movie] n. One who loves to add features to designs or programs,
  perhaps at the expense of coherence, concision, or {taste}.  See
  also {feeping creaturism}, {creeping featurism}.

feature shock: [from Alvin Toffler's book title `Future
  Shock'] n.  A user's (or programmer's!) confusion when confronted
  with a package that has too many features and poor introductory
  material.

featurectomy: /fee`ch*r-ek't*-mee/ n. The act of removing a
  feature from a program.  Featurectomies come in two flavors, the
  `righteous' and the `reluctant'.  Righteous featurectomies are
  performed because the remover believes the program would be more
  elegant without the feature, or there is already an equivalent and
  better way to achieve the same end.  (This is not quite the same
  thing as removing a {misfeature}.)  Reluctant featurectomies are
  performed to satisfy some external constraint such as code size or
  execution speed.

feep: /feep/ 1. n. The soft electronic `bell' sound of a
  display terminal (except for a VT-52); a beep (in fact, the
  microcomputer world seems to prefer {beep}).  2. vi. To cause
  the display to make a feep sound.  ASR-33s (the original TTYs) do
  not feep; they have mechanical bells that ring.  Alternate forms:
  {beep}, `bleep', or just about anything suitably
  onomatopoeic.  (Jeff MacNelly, in his comic strip "Shoe", uses
  the word `eep' for sounds made by computer terminals and video
  games; this is perhaps the closest written approximation yet.)  The
  term `breedle' was sometimes heard at SAIL, where the terminal
  bleepers are not particularly soft (they sound more like the
  musical equivalent of a raspberry or Bronx cheer; for a close
  approximation, imagine the sound of a Star Trek communicator's beep
  lasting for 5 seconds).  The `feeper' on a VT-52 has been
  compared to the sound of a '52 Chevy stripping its gears.  See also
  {ding}.

feeper: /fee'pr/ n. The device in a terminal or workstation (usually
  a loudspeaker of some kind) that makes the {feep} sound.

feeping creature: [from {feeping creaturism}] n. An unnecessary
  feature; a bit of {chrome} that, in the speaker's judgment, is
  the camel's nose for a whole horde of new features.

feeping creaturism: /fee'ping kree`ch*r-izm/ n. A deliberate
  spoonerism for {creeping featurism}, meant to imply that the
  system or program in question has become a misshapen creature of
  hacks.  This term isn't really well defined, but it sounds so neat
  that most hackers have said or heard it.  It is probably reinforced
  by an image of terminals prowling about in the dark making their
  customary noises.

feetch feetch: /feech feech/ interj. If someone tells you about
  some new improvement to a program, you might respond: "Feetch,
  feetch!"  The meaning of this depends critically on vocal
  inflection.  With enthusiasm, it means something like "Boy, that's
  great!  What a great hack!"  Grudgingly or with obvious doubt, it
  means "I don't know; it sounds like just one more unnecessary and
  complicated thing".  With a tone of resignation, it means, "Well,
  I'd rather keep it simple, but I suppose it has to be done".

fence: n. 1. A sequence of one or more distinguished
  ({out-of-band}) characters (or other data items), used to
  delimit a piece of data intended to be treated as a unit (the
  computer-science literature calls this a `sentinel').  The NUL
  (ASCII 0000000) character that terminates strings in C is a fence.
  Hex FF is probably the most common fence character after NUL.  See
  {zigamorph}.  2. [among users of optimizing compilers] Any
  technique, usually exploiting knowledge about the compiler, that
  blocks certain optimizations.  Used when explicit mechanisms are
  not available or are overkill.  Typically a hack: "I call a dummy
  procedure there to force a flush of the optimizer's
  register-coloring info" can be expressed by the shorter "That's a
  fence procedure".

fencepost error: n. 1. A problem with the discrete equivalent of a
  boundary condition.  Often exhibited in programs by iterative
  loops.  From the following problem: "If you build a fence 100 feet
  long with posts 10 feet apart, how many posts do you need?"
  Either 9 or 11 is a better answer than the obvious 10.  For
  example, suppose you have a long list or array of items, and want
  to process items m through n; how many items are there?  The
  obvious answer is n - m, but that is off by one; the right
  answer is n - m + 1.  A program that used the `obvious'
  formula would have a fencepost error in it.  See also {zeroth}
  and {off-by-one error}, and note that not all off-by-one errors
  are fencepost errors.  The game of Musical Chairs involves a
  catastrophic off-by-one error where N people try to sit in
  N - 1 chairs, but it's not a fencepost error.  Fencepost
  errors come from counting things rather than the spaces between
  them, or vice versa, or by neglecting to consider whether one
  should count one or both ends of a row.  2. Occasionally, an error
  induced by unexpectedly regular spacing of inputs, which can (for
  instance) screw up your hash table.

fepped out: /fept owt/ adj. The Symbolics 3600 Lisp Machine has a
  Front-End Processor called a `FEP' (compare sense 2 of {box}).
  When the main processor gets {wedged}, the FEP takes control of
  the keyboard and screen.  Such a machine is said to have
  `fepped out'.

FidoNet: n. A worldwide hobbyist network of personal computers
  which exchange mail, discussion groups, and files.  Founded in 1984
  and originally consisting only of IBM PCs and compatibles, FidoNet
  now includes such diverse machines as Apple ][s, Ataris, Amigas,
  and UNIX systems.  Though it is much younger than {USENET},
  FidoNet is already (in early 1991) a significant fraction of
  USENET's size at some 8000 systems.

field circus: [a derogatory pun on `field service'] n. The field
  service organization of any hardware manufacturer, but especially
  DEC.  There is an entire genre of jokes about DEC field circus
  engineers:

    Q: How can you recognize a DEC field circus engineer
       with a flat tire?
    A: He's changing each tire to see which one is flat.

    Q: How can you recognize a DEC field circus engineer
       who is out of gas?
    A: He's changing each tire to see which one is flat.

  There is also the `Field Circus Cheer' (from the {plan file} for
  DEC on MIT-AI):

    Maynard! Maynard!
    Don't mess with us!
    We're mean and we're tough!
    If you get us confused
    We'll screw up your stuff.

  (DEC's service HQ is located in Maynard, Massachusetts.)

field servoid: [play on `android'] /fee'ld ser'voyd/ n.
  Representative of a field service organization (see {field
  circus}).  This has many of the implications of {droid}.

Fight-o-net: [FidoNet] n. Deliberate distortion of {FidoNet},
  often applied after a flurry of {flamage} in a particular
  {echo}, especially the SYSOP echo or Fidonews (see {'Snooze}).

File Attach: [FidoNet] 1. n. A file sent along with a mail message
  from one BBS to another.  2. vt. Sending someone a file by using
  the File Attach option in a BBS mailer.

File Request: [FidoNet] 1. n. The {FidoNet} equivalent of
  {FTP}, in which one BBS system automatically dials another and
  {snarf}s one or more files.  Files are often announced as being
  "available for {FReq}" in the same way that files are announced
  as being "available for/by anonymous FTP" on the Internet.
  2. vt. The act of getting a copy of a file by using the File
  Request option of the BBS mailer.

filk: /filk/ [from SF fandom, where a typo for `folk' was
  adopted as a new word] n.,v. A `filk' is a popular or folk song
  with lyrics revised or completely new lyrics, intended for humorous
  effect when read and/or to be sung late at night at SF conventions.
  There is a flourishing subgenre of these called `computer filks',
  written by hackers and often containing rather sophisticated
  technical humor.  See {double bucky} for an example.

film at 11: [MIT: in parody of TV newscasters] Used in conversation
  to announce ordinary events, with a sarcastic implication that
  these events are earth-shattering.  "{{ITS}} crashes; film at 11."
  "Bug found in scheduler; film at 11."

filter: [orig. {{UNIX}}, now also in {{MS-DOS}}] n. A program that
  processes an input data stream into an output data stream in some
  well-defined way, and does no I/O to anywhere else except possibly
  on error conditions; one designed to be used as a stage in a
  `pipeline' (see {plumbing}).

Finagle's Law: n. The generalized or `folk' version of
  {Murphy's Law}, fully named "Finagle's Law of Dynamic
  Negatives" and usually rendered "Anything that can go wrong,
  will".  One variant favored among hackers is "The perversity of
  the Universe tends towards a maximum" (but see also {Hanlon's
  Razor}).  The label `Finagle's Law' was popularized by SF author
  Larry Niven in several stories depicting a frontier culture of
  asteroid miners; this `Belter' culture professed a religion
  and/or running joke involving the worship of the dread god Finagle
  and his mad prophet Murphy.

fine: [WPI] adj. Good, but not good enough to be {cuspy}.  The word
  `fine' is used elsewhere, of course, but without the implicit
  comparison to the higher level implied by {cuspy}.

finger: [WAITS, via BSD UNIX] 1. n. A program that displays a
  particular user or all users logged on the system or a remote
  system.  Typically shows full name, last login time, idle time,
  terminal line, and terminal location (where applicable).  May also
  display a {plan file} left by the user.  2. vt. To apply finger
  to a username.  3. vt. By extension, to check a human's current
  state by any means.  "Foodp?"  "T!"  "OK, finger Lisa and see
  if she's idle."  4. Any picture (composed of ASCII characters)
  depicting `the finger'.  Originally a humorous component of one's
  plan file to deter the curious fingerer (sense 2), it has entered
  the arsenal of some {flamer}s.

finger-pointing syndrome: n. All-too-frequent result of bugs, esp.
  in new or experimental configurations.  The hardware vendor points
  a finger at the software.  The software vendor points a finger
  at the hardware.  All the poor users get is the finger.

firebottle: n. A large, primitive, power-hungry active electrical
  device, similar in function to a FET but constructed out of glass,
  metal, and vacuum.  Characterized by high cost, low density, low
  reliability, high-temperature operation, and high power
  dissipation.  Sometimes mistakenly called a `tube' in the U.S.
  or a `valve' in England; another hackish term is {glassfet}.

firefighting: n. 1. What sysadmins have to do to correct sudden
  operational problems.  An opposite of hacking.  "Been hacking your
  new newsreader?"  "No, a power glitch hosed the network and I spent
  the whole afternoon fighting fires."  2. The act of throwing lots
  of manpower and late nights at a project, esp. to get it out
  before deadline.  See also {gang bang}, {Mongolian Hordes
  technique}; however, the term `firefighting' connotes that the
  effort is going into chasing bugs rather than adding features.

firewall code: n. The code you put in a system (say, a telephone
  switch) to make sure that the users can't do any damage. Since
  users always want to be able to do everything but never want to
  suffer for any mistakes, the construction of a firewall is a
  question not only of defensive coding but also of interface
  presentation, so that users don't even get curious about those
  corners of a system where they can burn themselves.

firewall machine: n. A dedicated gateway machine with special
  security precautions on it, used to service outside network
  connections and dial-in lines.  The idea is to protect a cluster of
  more loosely administered machines hidden behind it from
  {cracker}s.  The typical firewall is an inexpensive micro-based
  UNIX box kept clean of critical data, with a bunch of modems and
  public network ports on it but just one carefully watched
  connection back to the rest of the cluster.  The special
  precautions may include threat monitoring, callback, and even a
  complete {iron box} keyable to particular incoming IDs or
  activity patterns.  Syn. {flytrap}, {Venus flytrap}.

fireworks mode: n. The mode a machine is sometimes said to be in when
  it is performing a {crash and burn} operation.

firmy: /fer'mee/ Syn. {stiffy} (a 3.5-inch floppy disk).

fish: [Adelaide University, Australia] n. 1. Another metasyntactic
  variable.  See {foo}.  Derived originally from the Monty Python
  skit in the middle of "The Meaning of Life" entitled "Find the
  Fish".  2. A pun for `microfiche'.  A microfiche file cabinet may be
  referred to as a `fish tank'.

FISH queue: [acronym, by analogy with FIFO (First In, First Out)]
  n. `First In, Still Here'.  A joking way of pointing out that
  processing of a particular sequence of events or requests has
  stopped dead.  Also `FISH mode' and `FISHnet'; the latter
  may be applied to any network that is running really slowly or
  exhibiting extreme flakiness.

fix: n.,v. What one does when a problem has been reported too many
  times to be ignored.

flag: n. A variable or quantity that can take on one of two
  values; a bit, particularly one that is used to indicate one of two
  outcomes or is used to control which of two things is to be done.
  "This flag controls whether to clear the screen before printing
  the message."  "The program status word contains several flag
  bits."  Used of humans analogously to {bit}.  See also
  {hidden flag}, {mode bit}.

flag day: n. A software change that is neither forward- nor
  backward-compatible, and which is costly to make and costly to
  reverse.  "Can we install that without causing a flag day for all
  users?"  This term has nothing to do with the use of the word
  {flag} to mean a variable that has two values.  It came into use
  when a massive change was made to the {{Multics}} timesharing
  system to convert from the old ASCII code to the new one; this was
  scheduled for Flag Day (a U.S. holiday), June 14, 1966.  See also
  {backward combatability}.

flaky: adj. (var sp. `flakey') Subject to frequent {lossage}.
  This use is of course related to the common slang use of the word
  to describe a person as eccentric, crazy, or just unreliable.  A
  system that is flaky is working, sort of --- enough that you are
  tempted to try to use it --- but fails frequently enough that the
  odds in favor of finishing what you start are low.  Commonwealth
  hackish prefers {dodgy} or {wonky}.

flamage: /flay'm*j/ n. Flaming verbiage, esp. high-noise,
  low-signal postings to {USENET} or other electronic {fora}.
  Often in the phrase `the usual flamage'.  `Flaming' is the act
  itself; `flamage' the content; a `flame' is a single flaming
  message.  See {flame}.

flame: 1. vi. To post an email message intended to insult and
  provoke.  2. vi. To speak incessantly and/or rabidly on some
  relatively uninteresting subject or with a patently ridiculous
  attitude.  3. vt. Either of senses 1 or 2, directed with
  hostility at a particular person or people.  4. n. An instance of
  flaming.  When a discussion degenerates into useless controversy,
  one might tell the participants "Now you're just flaming" or
  "Stop all that flamage!" to try to get them to cool down (so to
  speak).

  USENETter Marc Ramsey, who was at WPI from 1972 to 1976, adds: "I
  am 99% certain that the use of `flame' originated at WPI.  Those
  who made a nuisance of themselves insisting that they needed to use
  a TTY for `real work' came to be known as `flaming asshole lusers'.
  Other particularly annoying people became `flaming asshole ravers',
  which shortened to `flaming ravers', and ultimately `flamers'.  I
  remember someone picking up on the Human Torch pun, but I don't
  think `flame on/off' was ever much used at WPI."  See also
  {asbestos}.

  The term may have been independently invented at several different
  places; it is also reported that `flaming' was in use to mean
  something like `interminably drawn-out semi-serious discussions'
  (late-night bull sessions) at Carleton College during 1968--1971.

flame bait: n. A posting intended to trigger a {flame war}, or one
  that invites flames in reply.

flame on: vi.,interj.  1. To begin to {flame}.  The punning
  reference to Marvel Comics's Human Torch is no longer widely
  recognized.  2. To continue to flame.  See {rave}, {burble}.

flame war: n. (var. `flamewar') An acrimonious dispute,
  especially when conducted on a public electronic forum such as
  {USENET}.

flamer: n. One who habitually {flame}s.  Said esp. of obnoxious
  {USENET} personalities.

flap: vt. 1. To unload a DECtape (so it goes flap, flap,
  flap...).  Old-time hackers at MIT tell of the days when the
  disk was device 0 and {microtape}s were 1, 2,... and
  attempting to flap device 0 would instead start a motor banging
  inside a cabinet near the disk.  2. By extension, to unload any
  magnetic tape.  See also {macrotape}.  Modern cartridge tapes no
  longer actually flap, but the usage has remained.

flarp: /flarp/ [Rutgers University] n. Yet another metasyntactic
  variable (see {foo}).  Among those who use it, it is associated
  with a legend that any program not containing the word `flarp'
  somewhere will not work.  The legend is discreetly silent on the
  reliability of programs which *do* contain the magic word.

flat: adj. 1. Lacking any complex internal structure.  "That
  {bitty box} has only a flat filesystem, not a hierarchical
  one."  The verb form is {flatten}.  2. Said of a memory
  architecture (like that of the VAX or 680x0) that is one big linear
  address space (typically with each possible value of a processor
  register corresponding to a unique core address), as opposed to a
  `segmented' architecture (like that of the 80x86) in which
  addresses are composed from a base-register/offset pair (segmented
  designs are generally considered {cretinous}).

flat-ASCII: adj. Said of a text file that contains only 7-bit ASCII
  characters and uses only ASCII-standard control characters (that
  is, has no embedded codes specific to a particular text formatter
  or markup language, and no {meta}-characters).  Syn.
  {plain-ASCII}.  Compare {flat-file}.

flat-file: adj. A {flatten}ed representation of some database or
  tree or network structure as a single file from which the
  structure could implicitly be rebuilt, esp. one in {flat-ASCII}
  form.

flatten: vt. To remove structural information, esp. to filter
  something with an implicit tree structure into a simple sequence of
  leaves; also tends to imply mapping to {flat-ASCII}.  "This code
  flattens an expression with parentheses into an equivalent
  {canonical} form."

flavor: n. 1. Variety, type, kind.  "DDT commands come in two
  flavors."  "These lights come in two flavors, big red ones and
  small green ones."  See {vanilla}.  2. The attribute that causes
  something to be {flavorful}.  Usually used in the phrase "yields
  additional flavor".  "This convention yields additional flavor by
  allowing one to print text either right-side-up or upside-down."
  See {vanilla}.  This usage was certainly reinforced by the
  terminology of quantum chromodynamics, in which quarks (the
  constituents of, e.g., protons) come in six flavors (up, down,
  strange, charm, top, bottom) and three colors (red, blue, green)
  --- however, hackish use of `flavor' at MIT predated QCD.  3. The
  term for `class' (in the object-oriented sense) in the LISP Machine
  Flavors system.  Though the Flavors design has been superseded
  (notably by the Common LISP CLOS facility), the term `flavor' is
  still used as a general synonym for `class' by some LISP hackers.

flavorful: adj. Full of {flavor}; esthetically pleasing.  See
  {random} and {losing} for antonyms.  See also the entries for
  {taste} and {elegant}.

flippy: /flip'ee/ n. A single-sided floppy disk altered for
  double-sided use by addition of a second write-notch, so called
  because it must be flipped over for the second side to be
  accessible.  No longer common.

flowchart:: [techspeak] n. An archaic form of visual control-flow
  specification employing arrows and `speech balloons' of various
  shapes.  Hackers never use flowcharts, consider them extremely
  silly, and associate them with {COBOL} programmers, {card
  walloper}s, and other lower forms of life.  This is because (from a
  hacker's point of view) they are no easier to read than code, are
  less precise, and tend to fall out of sync with the code (so that
  they either obfuscate it rather than explaining it or require
  extra maintenance effort that doesn't improve the code).  See also
  {pdl}, sense 3.

flower key: [Mac users] n. See {command key}.

flush: v. 1. To delete something, usually superfluous, or to abort
  an operation.  "All that nonsense has been flushed."  2. [UNIX/C]
  To force buffered I/O to disk, as with an `fflush(3)' call.
  This is *not* an abort or deletion as in sense 1, but a
  demand for early completion!  3. To leave at the end of a day's
  work (as opposed to leaving for a meal).  "I'm going to flush
  now."  "Time to flush."  4. To exclude someone from an activity,
  or to ignore a person.

  `Flush' was standard ITS terminology for aborting an output
  operation; one spoke of the text that would have been printed, but
  was not, as having been flushed.  It is speculated that this term
  arose from a vivid image of flushing unwanted characters by hosing
  down the internal output buffer, washing the characters away before
  they can be printed.  The UNIX/C usage, on the other hand, was
  propagated by the `fflush(3)' call in C's standard I/O library
  (though it is reported to have been in use among BLISS programmers
  at DEC and on Honeywell and IBM machines as far back as 1965).
  UNIX/C hackers find the ITS usage confusing, and vice versa.

Flyspeck 3: n. Standard name for any font that is so tiny as to be
  unreadable (by analogy with such names as `Helvetica 10' for
  10-point Helvetica).  Legal boilerplate is usually printed in
  Flyspeck 3.

flytrap: n. See {firewall machine}.

FOAF: // [USENET] n. Acronym for `Friend Of A Friend'.  The
  source of an unverified, possibly untrue story.  This was not
  originated by hackers (it is used in Jan Brunvand's books on urban
  folklore), but is much better recognized on USENET and elsewhere
  than in mainstream English.

FOD: /fod/ v. [Abbreviation for `Finger of Death', originally a
  spell-name from fantasy gaming] To terminate with extreme prejudice
  and with no regard for other people.  From {MUD}s where the
  wizard command `FOD <player>' results in the immediate and total
  death of <player>, usually as punishment for obnoxious behavior.
  This migrated to other circumstances, such as "I'm going to fod
  the process that is burning all the cycles."  Compare {gun}.

  In aviation, FOD means Foreign Object Damage, e.g., what happens
  when a jet engine sucks up a rock on the runway or a bird in
  flight.  Finger of Death is a distressingly apt description of
  what this does to the engine.

fold case: v. See {smash case}.  This term tends to be used
  more by people who don't mind that their tools smash case.  It also
  connotes that case is ignored but case distinctions in data
  processed by the tool in question aren't destroyed.

followup: n. On USENET, a {posting} generated in response to
  another posting (as opposed to a {reply}, which goes by email
  rather than being broadcast).  Followups include the ID of the
  {parent message} in their headers; smart news-readers can use
  this information to present USENET news in `conversation' sequence
  rather than order-of-arrival.  See {thread}.

foo: /foo/ 1. interj. Term of disgust.  2. Used very generally
  as a sample name for absolutely anything, esp. programs and files
  (esp. scratch files).  3. First on the standard list of
  metasyntactic variables used in syntax examples.  See also
  {bar}, {baz}, {qux}, {quux}, {corge}, {grault},
  {garply}, {waldo}, {fred}, {plugh}, {xyzzy},
  {thud}.

  {foo} is the {canonical} example of a `metasyntactic
  variable' --- a name used in examples and understood to stand for
  whatever thing is under discussion, or any random member of a class
  of things under discussion.  To avoid confusion, hackers never use
  `foo' or other words like it as permanent names for anything.  In
  filenames, a common convention is that any filename beginning
  `foo' is a scratch file that may be deleted at any time.

  The etymology of hackish `foo' is obscure.  When used in
  connection with `bar' it is generally traced to the WWII-era Army
  slang acronym FUBAR (`Fucked Up Beyond All Recognition'), later
  bowdlerized to {foobar}.  (See also {FUBAR}).

  However, the use of the word `foo' itself has more complicated
  antecedents, including a long history in comic strips and cartoons.
  The old "Smokey Stover" comic strips by Bill Holman often
  included the word `FOO', in particular on license plates of cars;
  allegedly, `FOO' and `BAR' also occurred in Walt Kelly's
  "Pogo" strips.  In the 1938 cartoon "Daffy Doc", a very
  early version of Daffy Duck holds up a sign saying "SILENCE IS
  FOO!"; oddly, this seems to refer to some approving or positive
  affirmative use of foo.  It is even possible that hacker usage
  actually springs from `FOO, Lampoons and Parody', the title of
  a comic book first issued in September 1958; the byline read
  `C. Crumb' but this may well have been a sort-of pseudonym for
  noted weird-comix artist Robert Crumb.  The title FOO was featured
  in large letters on the front cover.

  An old-time member reports that in the 1959 `Dictionary of the
  TMRC Language', compiled at {TMRC} there was an entry that went
  something like this:

       FOO: The first syllable of the sacred chant phrase "FOO MANE PADME
       HUM."  Our first obligation is to keep the foo counters turning.

  For more about the legendary foo counters, see {TMRC}.  Almost
  the entire AI staff was involved with TMRC, so it is not clear
  which group introduced the other to the word FOO.

  Very probably, hackish `foo' had no single origin and derives
  through all these channels from Yiddish `feh' and/or English
  `fooey'.

foobar: n. Another common metasyntactic variable; see {foo}.
  Hackers do *not* generally use this to mean {FUBAR} in
  either the slang or jargon sense.

fool: n. As used by hackers, specifically describes a person who
  habitually reasons from obviously or demonstrably incorrect
  premises and cannot be persuaded by evidence to do otherwise; it is
  not generally used in its other senses, i.e., to describe a person
  with a native incapacity to reason correctly, or a clown.  Indeed,
  in hackish experience many fools are capable of reasoning all too
  effectively in executing their errors.  See also {cretin},
  {loser}, {fool file, the}.

fool file, the: [USENET] n. A notional repository of all the most
  dramatically and abysmally stupid utterances ever.  There is a
  subgenre of {sig block}s that consists of the header "From the
  fool file:" followed by some quote the poster wishes to represent
  as an immortal gem of dimwittery; for this to be really effective,
  the quote has to be so obviously wrong as to be laughable.  More
  than one USENETter has achieved an unwanted notoriety by being
  quoted in this way.

Foonly: n. 1. The {PDP-10} successor that was to have been built by
  the Super Foonly project at the Stanford Artificial Intelligence
  Laboratory along with a new operating system.  The intention was to
  leapfrog from the old DEC timesharing system SAIL was running to a
  new generation, bypassing TENEX which at that time was the ARPANET
  standard.  ARPA funding for both the Super Foonly and the new
  operating system was cut in 1974.  Most of the design team went to
  DEC and contributed greatly to the design of the PDP-10 model KL10.
  2. The name of the company formed by Dave Poole, one of the
  principal Super Foonly designers, and one of hackerdom's more
  colorful personalities.  Many people remember the parrot which sat
  on Poole's shoulder and was a regular companion.  3. Any of the
  machines built by Poole's company.  The first was the F-1 (a.k.a.
  Super Foonly), which was the computational engine used to create
  the graphics in the movie "TRON".  The F-1 was the fastest
  PDP-10 ever built, but only one was ever made.  The effort drained
  Foonly of its financial resources, and they turned towards building
  smaller, slower, and much less expensive machines.  Unfortunately,
  these ran not the popular {TOPS-20} but a TENEX varient called
  Foonex; this seriously limited their market.  Also, the machines
  shipped were actually wire-wrapped engineering prototypes requiring
  individual attention from more than usually competent site
  personnel, and thus had significant reliability problems.  Poole's
  legendary temper and unwillingness to suffer fools gladly did not
  help matters.  By the time of the Jupiter project cancellation in
  1983 Foonly's proposal to build another F-1 was eclipsed by the
  {Mars}, and the company never quite recovered.  See the
  {Mars} entry for the continuation and moral of this story.

footprint: n. 1. The floor or desk area taken up by a piece of
  hardware.  2. [IBM] The audit trail (if any) left by a crashed
  program (often in plural, `footprints').  See also
  {toeprint}.

for free: adj. Said of a capability of a programming language or
  hardware equipment that is available by its design without needing
  cleverness to implement: "In APL, we get the matrix operations for
  free."  "And owing to the way revisions are stored in this
  system, you get revision trees for free."  Usually it refers to a
  serendipitous feature of doing things a certain way (compare
  {big win}), but it may refer to an intentional but secondary
  feature.

for the rest of us: [from the Mac slogan "The computer for the
  rest of us"] adj. 1. Used to describe a {spiffy} product whose
  affordability shames other comparable products, or (more often)
  used sarcastically to describe {spiffy} but very overpriced
  products.  2. Describes a program with a limited interface,
  deliberately limited capabilities, non-orthogonality, inability to
  compose primitives, or any other limitation designed to not
  `confuse' a na"ive user.  This places an upper bound on how far that
  user can go before the program begins to get in the way of the task
  instead of helping accomplish it.  Used in reference to Macintosh
  software which doesn't provide obvious capabilities because it is
  thought that the poor lusers might not be able to handle them.
  Becomes `the rest of *them*' when used in third-party
  reference; thus, "Yes, it is an attractive program, but it's
  designed for The Rest Of Them" means a program that superficially
  looks neat but has no depth beyond the surface flash.  See also
  {WIMP environment}, {Macintrash}, {user-friendly}.

fora: pl.n. Plural of {forum}.

foreground: [UNIX] vt. To foreground a task is to bring it to
  the top of one's {stack} for immediate processing, and hackers
  often use it in this sense for non-computer tasks. "If your
  presentation is due next week, I guess I'd better foreground
  writing up the design document."

  Technically, on a time-sharing system, a task executing in
  foreground is one able to accept input from and return output to
  the user; oppose {background}.  Nowadays this term is primarily
  associated with {{UNIX}}, but it appears first to have been used
  in this sense on OS/360.  Normally, there is only one foreground
  task per terminal (or terminal window); having multiple processes
  simultaneously reading the keyboard is a good way to {lose}.

forked: [UNIX; prob. influenced by a mainstream expletive] adj.
  Terminally slow, or dead.  Originated when one system slowed to
  incredibly bad speeds because of a process recursively spawning copies
  of itself (using the UNIX system call `fork(2)') and taking up
  all the process table entries.

Fortrash: /for'trash/ n. Hackerism for the FORTRAN language,
  referring to its primitive design, gross and irregular syntax,
  limited control constructs, and slippery, exception-filled
  semantics.

fortune cookie: [UNIX] n. A random quote, item of trivia, joke, or
  maxim printed to the user's tty at login time or (less commonly) at
  logout time.  Items from this lexicon have often been used as
  fortune cookies.  See {cookie file}.

forum: n. [USENET, GEnie CI$; pl. `fora' or `forums'] Any
  discussion group accessible through a dial-in {BBS}, a
  {mailing list}, or a {newsgroup} (see {network, the}).  A
  forum functions much like a bulletin board; users submit
  {posting}s for all to read and discussion ensues.  Contrast
  real-time chat via {talk mode} or point-to-point personal
  {email}.

fossil: n. 1. In software, a misfeature that becomes understandable
  only in historical context, as a remnant of times past retained so
  as not to break compatibility.  Example: the retention of octal as
  default base for string escapes in {C}, in spite of the better
  match of hexadecimal to ASCII and modern byte-addressable
  architectures.  See {dusty deck}.  2. More restrictively, a
  feature with past but no present utility.  Example: the
  force-all-caps (LCASE) bits in the V7 and {BSD} UNIX tty driver,
  designed for use with monocase terminals.  In a perversion of the
  usual backward-compatibility goal, this functionality has actually
  been expanded and renamed in some later {USG UNIX} releases as
  the IUCLC and OLCUC bits.  3. The FOSSIL (Fido/Opus/Seadog
  Standard Interface Level) driver specification for serial-port
  access to replace the {brain-dead} routines in the IBM PC ROMs.
  Fossils are used by most MS-DOS {BBS} software in lieu of
  programming the {bare metal} of the serial ports, as the ROM
  routines do not support interrupt-driven operation or setting
  speeds above 9600.  Since the FOSSIL specification allows
  additional functionality to be hooked in, drivers that use the
  {hook} but do not provide serial-port access themselves are named
  with a modifier, as in `video fossil'.

four-color glossies: 1. Literature created by {marketroid}s
  that allegedly containing technical specs but which is in fact as
  superficial as possible without being totally {content-free}.
  "Forget the four-color glossies, give me the tech ref manuals."
  Often applied as an indication of superficiality even when the
  material is printed on ordinary paper in black and white.
  Four-color-glossy manuals are *never* useful for finding a
  problem.  2. [rare] Applied by extension to manual pages that don't
  contain enough information to diagnose why the program doesn't
  produce the expected or desired output.

fragile: adj. Syn {brittle}.

fred: n. 1. The personal name most frequently used as a
  metasyntactic variable (see {foo}).  Allegedly popular because
  it's easy for a non-touch-typist to type on a standard QWERTY
  keyboard.  Unlike {J. Random Hacker} or `J. Random Loser',
  this name has no positive or negative loading (but see {Mbogo,
  Dr. Fred}).  2. An acronym for `Flipping Ridiculous Electronic
  Device'; other F-verbs may be substituted for `flipping'.

frednet: /fred'net/ n. Used to refer to some {random} and
  uncommon protocol encountered on a network.  "We're implementing
  bridging in our router to solve the frednet problem."

freeware: n. Free software, often written by enthusiasts and
  distributed by users' groups, or via electronic mail, local
  bulletin boards, {USENET}, or other electronic media.  At one
  time, `freeware' was a trademark of Andrew Fluegelman, the author
  of the well-known MS-DOS comm program PC-TALK III.  It wasn't
  enforced after his mysterious disappearance and presumed death
  in 1984.  See {shareware}.

freeze: v. To lock an evolving software distribution or document
  against changes so it can be released with some hope of stability.
  Carries the strong implication that the item in question will
  `unfreeze' at some future date.  "OK, fix that bug and we'll
  freeze for release."

  There are more specific constructions on this.  A `feature freeze',
  for example, locks out modifications intended to introduce new
  features; a `code freeze' connotes no more changes at all.
  At Sun Microsystems and elsewhere, one may also hear references to
  `code slush' --- that is, an almost-but-not-quite frozen state.

fried: adj. 1. Non-working due to hardware failure; burnt out.
  Especially used of hardware brought down by a `power glitch' (see
  {glitch}), {drop-outs}, a short, or some other electrical
  event.  (Sometimes this literally happens to electronic circuits!
  In particular, resistors can burn out and transformers can melt
  down, emitting noxious smoke.  However, this term is also used
  metaphorically.)  Compare {frotzed}.  2. Of people, exhausted.
  Said particularly of those who continue to work in such a state.
  Often used as an explanation or excuse.  "Yeah, I know that fix
  destroyed the file system, but I was fried when I put it in."
  Esp. common in conjunction with `brain': "My brain is fried
  today, I'm very short on sleep."

friode: /fri:'ohd/ [TMRC] n. A reversible (that is, fused or
  blown) diode.  Compare {fried}.

fritterware: n. An excess of capability that serves no productive
  end.  The canonical example is font-diddling software on the Mac
  (see {macdink}); the term describes anything that eats huge
  amounts of time for quite marginal gains in function but seduces
  people into using it anyway.


frob: /frob/ 1. n. [MIT] The {TMRC} definition was "FROB = a
  protruding arm or trunnion"; by metaphoric extension, a `frob' is
  any random small thing; an object that you can comfortably hold in
  one hand; something you can frob.  See {frobnitz}.  2. vt.
  Abbreviated form of {frobnicate}.  3. [from the {MUD} world]
  A command on some MUDs that changes a player's experience level
  (this can be used to make wizards); also, to request {wizard}
  privileges on the `professional courtesy' grounds that one is a
  wizard elsewhere.

frobnicate: /frob'ni-kayt/ vt. [Poss. derived from {frobnitz}, and
  usually abbreviated to {frob}, but `frobnicate' is recognized
  as the official full form.] To manipulate or adjust, to tweak.
  One frequently frobs bits or other 2-state devices.  Thus:
  "Please frob the light switch" (that is, flip it), but also
  "Stop frobbing that clasp; you'll break it".  One also sees the
  construction `to frob a frob'.  See {tweak} and {twiddle}.
  Usage: frob, twiddle, and tweak sometimes connote
  points along a continuum.  `Frob' connotes aimless manipulation;
  `twiddle' connotes gross manipulation, often a coarse search for
  a proper setting; `tweak' connotes fine-tuning.  If someone is
  turning a knob on an oscilloscope, then if he's carefully adjusting
  it, he is probably tweaking it; if he is just turning it but looking
  at the screen, he is probably twiddling it; but if he's just doing
  it because turning a knob is fun, he's frobbing it.  The variant
  `frobnosticate' has been recently reported.

frobnitz: /frob'nits/, pl. `frobnitzem' /frob'nit-zm/ or
  `frobni' /frob'ni:/ n. An unspecified physical object, a
  widget.  Also refers to electronic black boxes.  This rare form is
  usually abbreviated to `frotz', or more commonly to {frob}.
  Also used are `frobnule' (/frob'n[y]ool/) and `frobule'
  (/frob'yool/).  Starting perhaps in 1979, `frobozz'
  /fruh-boz'/ (plural: `frobbotzim' /fruh-bot'zm/) has also
  become very popular, largely through its exposure as a name via
  {Zork}.  These can also be applied to nonphysical objects, such
  as data structures.

frog: alt. `phrog' 1. interj. Term of disgust (we seem to have
  a lot of them).  2. Used as a name for just about anything.  See
  {foo}.  3. n. Of things, a crock.  4. n. Of people, somewhere
  in between a turkey and a toad.  5. `froggy': adj. Similar to
  `bagbiting' (see {bagbiter}), but milder.  "This froggy
  program is taking forever to run!"

front end: n. 1. An intermediary computer that does set-up and
  filtering for another (usually more powerful but less friendly)
  machine (a `back end').  2. What you're talking to when you
  have a conversation with someone who is making replies without
  paying attention.  "Look at the dancing elephants!"  "Uh-huh."
  "Do you know what I just said?"  "Sorry, you were talking to the
  front end."  See also {fepped out}.  3. Software that provides
  an interface to another program `behind' it, which may not be as
  user-friendly.  Probably from analogy with hardware front-ends (see
  sense 1) that interfaced with mainframes.

frotz: /frots/ 1. n. See {frobnitz}.  2. `mumble frotz': An
  interjection of very mild disgust.

frotzed: /frotst/ adj. {down} because of hardware problems.  Compare
  {fried}.  A machine that is merely frotzed may be fixable
  without replacing parts, but a fried machine is more seriously
  damaged.

frowney: n. (alt. `frowney face')  See {emoticon}.

fry: 1. vi. To fail.  Said especially of smoke-producing hardware
  failures.  More generally, to become non-working.  Usage: never
  said of software, only of hardware and humans.  See {fried},
  {magic smoke}.  2. vt. To cause to fail; to {roach}, {toast},
  or {hose} a piece of hardware.  Never used of software or humans,
  but compare {fried}.

FTP: /F-T-P/, *not* /fit'ip/ 1. [techspeak] n. The File
  Transfer Protocol for transmitting files between systems on the
  Internet.  2. vt. To {beam} a file using the File Transfer
  Protocol.  3. Sometimes used as a generic even for file transfers
  not using {FTP}.  "Lemme get a copy of `Wuthering
  Heights' ftp'd from uunet."

FUBAR: n. The Failed UniBus Address Register in a VAX.  A good
  example of how jargon can occasionally be snuck past the {suit}s;
  see {foobar}.

fuck me harder: excl. Sometimes uttered in response to egregious
  misbehavior, esp. in software, and esp. of misbehaviors which
  seem unfairly persistent (as though designed in by the imp of the
  perverse).  Often theatrically elaborated: "Aiighhh! Fuck me with
  a piledriver and 16 feet of curare-tipped wrought-iron fence
  *and no lubricants*!" The phrase is sometimes heard
  abbreviated `FMH' in polite company.

  [This entry is an extreme example of the hackish habit of coining
  elaborate and evocative terms for lossage. Here we see a quite
  self-conscious parody of mainstream expletives that has become a
  running gag in part of the hacker culture; it illustrates the
  hackish tendency to turn any situation, even one of extreme
  frustration, into an intellectual game (the point being, in this
  case, to creatively produce a long-winded description of the
  most anatomically absurd mental image possible --- the short forms
  implicitly allude to all the ridiculous long forms ever spoken).
  Scatological language is actually relatively uncommon among
  hackers, and there was some controversy over whether this entry
  ought to be included at all.  As it reflects a live usage
  recognizably peculiar to the hacker culture, we feel it is
  in the hackish spirit of truthfulness and opposition to all
  forms of censorship to record it here. --ESR & GLS]

FUD: /fuhd/ n. Defined by Gene Amdahl after he left IBM to found
  his own company: "FUD is the fear, uncertainty, and doubt that IBM
  sales people instill in the minds of potential customers who might
  be considering [Amdahl] products."  The idea, of course, was to
  persuade them to go with safe IBM gear rather than with
  competitors' equipment.  This was traditionally done by promising
  that Good Things would happen to people who stuck with IBM, but
  Dark Shadows loomed over the future of competitors' equipment or
  software.  See {IBM}.

FUD wars: /fuhd worz/ n. [from {FUD}] Political posturing engaged in
  by hardware and software vendors ostensibly committed to
  standardization but actually willing to fragment the market to
  protect their own shares.  The UNIX International vs. OSF conflict
  is but one outstanding example.

fudge: 1. vt. To perform in an incomplete but marginally acceptable
  way, particularly with respect to the writing of a program.  "I
  didn't feel like going through that pain and suffering, so I fudged
  it --- I'll fix it later."  2. n. The resulting code.

fudge factor: n. A value or parameter that is varied in an ad hoc way
  to produce the desired result.  The terms `tolerance' and
  {slop} are also used, though these usually indicate a one-sided
  leeway, such as a buffer that is made larger than necessary
  because one isn't sure exactly how large it needs to be, and it is
  better to waste a little space than to lose completely for not
  having enough.  A fudge factor, on the other hand, can often be
  tweaked in more than one direction.  A good example is the `fuzz'
  typically allowed in floating-point calculations: two numbers being
  compared for equality must be allowed to differ by a small amount;
  if that amount is too small, a computation may never terminate,
  while if it is too large, results will be needlessly inaccurate.
  Fudge factors are frequently adjusted incorrectly by programmers
  who don't fully understand their import.  See also {coefficient
  of X}.

fuel up: vi. To eat or drink hurriedly in order to get back to
  hacking.  "Food-p?"  "Yeah, let's fuel up."  "Time for a
  {great-wall}!"  See also {{oriental food}}.

fuggly: /fuhg'lee/ adj. Emphatic form of {funky}; funky +
  ugly).  Unusually for hacker jargon, this may actually derive from
  black street-jive.  To say it properly, the first syllable should
  be growled rather than spoken.  Usage: humorous.  "Man, the
  {{ASCII}}-to-{{EBCDIC}} code in that printer driver is
  *fuggly*."  See also {wonky}.

funky: adj. Said of something that functions, but in a slightly
  strange, klugey way.  It does the job and would be difficult to
  change, so its obvious non-optimality is left alone.  Often used to
  describe interfaces.  The more bugs something has that nobody has
  bothered to fix because workarounds are easier, the funkier it is.
  {TECO} and UUCP are funky.  The Intel i860's exception handling is
  extraordinarily funky.  Most standards acquire funkiness as they
  age.  "The new mailer is installed, but is still somewhat funky;
  if it bounces your mail for no reason, try resubmitting it."
  "This UART is pretty funky.  The data ready line is active-high in
  interrupt mode and active-low in DMA mode."  See {fuggly}.

funny money: n. 1. Notional `dollar' units of computing time and/or
  storage handed to students at the beginning of a computer course;
  also called `play money' or `purple money' (in implicit
  opposition to real or `green' money).  When your funny money
  ran out, your account froze and you needed to go to a professor to
  get more.  Fortunately, the plunging cost of timesharing cycles has
  made this less common.  The amounts allocated were almost
  invariably too small, even for the non-hackers who wanted to slide
  by with minimum work.  In extreme cases, the practice led to
  small-scale black markets in bootlegged computer accounts.  2. By
  extension, phantom money or quantity tickets of any kind used as a
  resource-allocation hack within a system.  Antonym: `real
  money'.

fuzzball: [TCP/IP hackers] n. A DEC LSI-11 running a particular
  suite of homebrewed software written by Dave Mills and assorted
  co-conspirators, used in the early 1980s for Internet protocol
  testbedding and experimentation.  These were used as NSFnet
  backbone sites in its early 56KB-line days; a few are still active
  on the Internet as of early 1991, doing odd jobs such as network
  time service.

= G =
=====

G: [SI] pref.,suff. See {{quantifiers}}.

gabriel: /gay'bree-*l/ [for Dick Gabriel, SAIL LISP hacker and
  volleyball fanatic] n. An unnecessary (in the opinion of the
  opponent) stalling tactic, e.g., tying one's shoelaces or combing one's hair
  repeatedly, asking the time, etc.  Also used to refer to the
  perpetrator of such tactics.  Also, `pulling a Gabriel',
  `Gabriel mode'.

gag: vi. Equivalent to {choke}, but connotes more disgust. "Hey,
  this is FORTRAN code.  No wonder the C compiler gagged."  See also
  {barf}.

gang bang: n. The use of large numbers of loosely coupled
  programmers in an attempt to wedge a great many features into a
  product in a short time.  Though there have been memorable gang
  bangs (e.g., that over-the-weekend assembler port mentioned in
  Steven Levy's `Hackers'), most are perpetrated by large
  companies trying to meet deadlines and produce enormous buggy
  masses of code entirely lacking in {orthogonal}ity.  When
  market-driven managers make a list of all the features the
  competition has and assign one programmer to implement each, they
  often miss the importance of maintaining a coherent design.  See
  also {firefighting}, {Mongolian Hordes technique},
  {Conway's Law}.

garbage collect: vi. (also `garbage collection', n.) See {GC}.

garply: /gar'plee/ [Stanford] n. Another meta-syntactic variable (see
  {foo}); once popular among SAIL hackers.

gas: [as in `gas chamber'] 1. interj. A term of disgust and
  hatred, implying that gas should be dispensed in generous
  quantities, thereby exterminating the source of irritation.  "Some
  loser just reloaded the system for no reason!  Gas!"  2. interj. A
  suggestion that someone or something ought to be flushed out of
  mercy.  "The system's getting {wedged} every few minutes.
  Gas!"  3. vt.  To {flush} (sense 1).  "You should gas that old
  crufty software."  4. [IBM] n. Dead space in nonsequentially
  organized files that was occupied by data that has been deleted;
  the compression operation that removes it is called `degassing' (by
  analogy, perhaps, with the use of the same term in vacuum
  technology). 5. [IBM] n.  Empty space on a disk that has been
  clandestinely allocated against future need.

gaseous: adj. Deserving of being {gas}sed.  Disseminated by
  Geoff Goodfellow while at SRI; became particularly popular after
  the Moscone-Milk killings in San Francisco, when it was learned
  that the defendant Dan White (a politician who had supported
  Proposition 7) would get the gas chamber under Proposition 7 if
  convicted of first-degree murder (he was eventually convicted of
  manslaughter).

GC: /G-C/ [from LISP terminology; `Garbage Collect']
  1. vt. To clean up and throw away useless things.  "I think I'll
  GC the top of my desk today."  When said of files, this is
  equivalent to {GFR}.  2. vt. To recycle, reclaim, or put to
  another use.  3. n. An instantiation of the garbage collector
  process.

  `Garbage collection' is computer-science jargon for a particular
  class of strategies for dynamically reallocating computer memory.
  One such strategy involves periodically scanning all the data in
  memory and determining what is no longer accessible; useless data
  items are then discarded so that the memory they occupy can be
  recycled and used for another purpose.  Implementations of the LISP
  language usually use garbage collection.

  In jargon, the full phrase is sometimes heard but the {abbrev} is
  more frequently used because it is shorter.  Note that there is an
  ambiguity in usage that has to be resolved by context: "I'm going
  to garbage-collect my desk" usually means to clean out the
  drawers, but it could also mean to throw away or recycle the desk
  itself.

GCOS:: /jee'kohs/ n. A {quick-and-dirty} {clone} of
  System/360 DOS that emerged from GE around 1970; originally called
  GECOS (the General Electric Comprehensive Operating System).  Later
  kluged to support primitive timesharing and transaction processing.
  After the buyout of GE's computer division by Honeywell, the name
  was changed to General Comprehensive Operating System (GCOS).
  Other OS groups at Honeywell began referring to it as `God's Chosen
  Operating System', allegedly in reaction to the GCOS crowd's
  uninformed and snotty attitude about the superiority of their
  product.  All this might be of zero interest, except for two facts:
  (1) The GCOS people won the political war, and this led in the
  orphaning and eventual death of Honeywell {{Multics}}, and
  (2) GECOS/GCOS left one permanent mark on UNIX.  Some early UNIX
  systems at Bell Labs were GCOS machines for print spooling and
  various other services; the field added to `/etc/passwd' to
  carry GCOS ID information was called the `GECOS field' and
  survives today as the `pw_gecos' member used for the user's
  full name and other human-ID information.  GCOS later played a
  major role in keeping Honeywell a dismal also-ran in the mainframe
  market, and was itself ditched for UNIX in the late 1980s when
  Honeywell retired its aging {big iron} designs.

GECOS:: /jee'kohs/ n. See {{GCOS}}.

gedanken: /g*-don'kn/ adj. Ungrounded; impractical; not
  well-thought-out; untried; untested.  `Gedanken' is a German word
  for `thought'.  A thought experiment is one you carry out in your
  head.  In physics, the term `gedanken experiment' is used to
  refer to an experiment that is impractical to carry out, but useful
  to consider because you can reason about it theoretically.  (A
  classic gedanken experiment of relativity theory involves thinking
  about a man in an elevator accelerating through space.)  Gedanken
  experiments are very useful in physics, but you have to be careful.
  It's too easy to idealize away some important aspect of the real world
  in contructing your `apparatus'.

  Among hackers, accordingly, the word has a pejorative connotation.
  It is said of a project, especially one in artificial intelligence
  research, that is written up in grand detail (typically as a Ph.D.
  thesis) without ever being implemented to any great extent.  Such a
  project is usually perpetrated by people who aren't very good
  hackers or find programming distasteful or are just in a hurry.  A
  `gedanken thesis' is usually marked by an obvious lack of intuition
  about what is programmable and what is not, and about what does and
  does not constitute a clear specification of an algorithm.  See
  also {AI-complete}, {DWIM}.

geef: v. [ostensibly from `gefingerpoken'] vt. Syn. {mung}.  See
  also {blinkenlights}.

geek out: vi. To temporarily enter techno-nerd mode while in a
  non-hackish context, for example at parties held near computer
  equipment.  Especially used when you need to do something highly
  technical and don't have time to explain: "Pardon me while I geek
  out for a moment."  See {computer geek}.

gen: /jen/ n.,v. Short for {generate}, used frequently in both spoken
  and written contexts.

gender mender: n. A cable connector shell with either two male or two
  female connectors on it, used to correct the mismatches that result
  when some {loser} didn't understand the RS232C specification and
  the distinction between DTE and DCE.  Used esp. for RS-232C
  parts in either the original D-25 or the IBM PC's bogus D-9 format.
  Also called `gender bender', `gender blender', `sex
  changer', and even `homosexual adapter'; however, there appears
  to be some confusion as to whether a `male homosexual adapter' has
  pins on both sides (is male) or sockets on both sides (connects two
  males).

General Public Virus: n. Pejorative name for some versions of the
  {GNU} project {copyleft} or General Public License (GPL), which
  requires that any tools or {app}s incorporating copylefted code
  must be source-distributed on the same counter-commercial terms as
  GNU stuff.  Thus it is alleged that the copyleft `infects' software
  generated with GNU tools, which may in turn infect other software
  that reuses any of its code.  The Free Software Foundation's
  official position as of January 1991 is that copyright law limits
  the scope of the GPL to "programs textually incorporating
  significant amounts of GNU code", and that the `infection' is not
  passed on to third parties unless actual GNU source is transmitted
  (as in, for example, use of the Bison parser skeleton).
  Nevertheless, widespread suspicion that the {copyleft} language
  is `boobytrapped' has caused many developers to avoid using GNU
  tools and the GPL.  Recent (July 1991) changes in the language of
  the version 2.00 language may eliminate this problem.

generate: vt. To produce something according to an algorithm or
  program or set of rules, or as a (possibly unintended) side effect
  of the execution of an algorithm or program.  The opposite of
  {parse}.  This term retains its mechanistic connotations (though
  often humorously) when used of human behavior.  "The guy is
  rational most of the time, but mention nuclear energy around him
  and he'll generate {infinite} flamage."

gensym: /jen'sim/ [from MacLISP for `generated symbol'] 1. v.
  To invent a new name for something temporary, in such a way that
  the name is almost certainly not in conflict with one already in
  use.  2. n.  The resulting name.  The canonical form of a gensym is
  `Gnnnn' where nnnn represents a number; any LISP hacker would
  recognize G0093 (for example) as a gensym.  3. A freshly generated
  data structure with a gensymmed name.  These are useful for storing
  or uniquely identifying crufties (see {cruft}).

Get a life!: imp. Hacker-standard way of suggesting that the person
  to whom you are speaking has succumbed to terminal geekdom (see
  {computer geek}).  Often heard on {USENET}, esp. as a way of
  suggesting that the target is taking some obscure issue of
  {theology} too seriously.  This exhortation was popularized by
  William Shatner on a "Saturday Night Live" episode in a speech that
  ended "Get a *life*!", but some respondents believe it to
  have been in use before then.

Get a real computer!: imp. Typical hacker response to news that
  somebody is having trouble getting work done on a system that
  (a) is single-tasking, (b) has no hard disk, or (c) has an address
  space smaller than 4 megabytes.  This is as of mid-1991; note that
  the threshold for `real computer' rises with time, and it may well
  be (for example) that machines with character-only displays will be
  generally considered `unreal' in a few years (GLS points out that
  they already are in some circles).  See {essentials}, {bitty
  box}, and {toy}.

GFR: /G-F-R/ vt. [ITS] From `Grim File Reaper', an ITS and Lisp
  Machine utility.  To remove a file or files according to some
  program-automated or semi-automatic manual procedure, especially
  one designed to reclaim mass storage space or reduce name-space
  clutter (the original GFR actually moved files to tape).  Often
  generalized to pieces of data below file level.  "I used to have
  his phone number, but I guess I {GFR}ed it."  See also
  {prowler}, {reaper}.  Compare {GC}, which discards only
  provably worthless stuff.

gig: /jig/ or /gig/ [SI] n. See {{quantifiers}}.

giga-: /ji'ga/ or /gi'ga/ [SI] pref. See {{quantifiers}}.

GIGO: /gi:'goh/ [acronym] 1. `Garbage In, Garbage Out' ---
  usually said in response to {luser}s who complain that a program
  didn't complain about faulty data.  Also commonly used to describe
  failures in human decision making due to faulty, incomplete, or
  imprecise data.  2. `Garbage In, Gospel Out': this more recent
  expansion is a sardonic comment on the tendency human beings have
  to put excessive trust in `computerized' data.

gillion: /gil'y*n/ or /jil'y*n/ [formed from {giga-} by analogy
  with mega/million and tera/trillion] n. 10^9. Same as an
  American billion or a British `milliard'.  How one pronounces
  this depends on whether one speaks {giga-} with a hard or
  soft `g'.

GIPS: /gips/ or /jips/ [analogy with {MIPS}] n.
  Giga-Instructions per Second (also possibly `Gillions of
  Instructions per Second'; see {gillion}).  In 1991, this is used
  of only a handful of highly parallel machines, but this is expected
  to change.  Compare {KIPS}.

glark: /glark/ vt. To figure something out from context.  "The
  System III manuals are pretty poor, but you can generally glark the
  meaning from context."  Interestingly, the word was originally
  `glork'; the context was "This gubblick contains many nonsklarkish
  English flutzpahs, but the overall pluggandisp can be glorked [sic]
  from context" (David Moser, quoted by Douglas Hofstadter in his
  "Metamagical Themas" column in the January 1981 `Scientific
  American').  It is conjectured that hackish usage mutated the verb to
  `glark' because {glork} was already an established jargon
  term.  Compare {grok}, {zen}.

glass: [IBM] n. Synonym for {silicon}.

glass tty: /glas T-T-Y/ or /glas ti'tee/ n. A terminal that
  has a display screen but which, because of hardware or software
  limitations, behaves like a teletype or some other printing
  terminal, thereby combining the disadvantages of both: like a
  printing terminal, it can't do fancy display hacks, and like a
  display terminal, it doesn't produce hard copy.  An example is the
  early `dumb' version of Lear-Siegler ADM 3 (without cursor
  control).  See {tube}, {tty}.  See appendix A for an
  interesting true story about a glass tty.

glassfet: /glas'fet/ [by analogy with MOSFET, the acronym for
  `Metal-Oxide-Semiconductor Field-Effect Transistor'] n. Syn.
  {firebottle}, a humorous way to refer to a vacuum tube.

glitch: /glich/ [from German `glitschen' to slip, via Yiddish
  `glitshen', to slide or skid] 1. n. A sudden interruption in
  electric service, sanity, continuity, or program function.
  Sometimes recoverable.  An interruption in electric service is
  specifically called a `power glitch'.  This is of grave concern
  because it usually crashes all the computers.  In jargon, though, a
  hacker who got to the middle of a sentence and then forgot how he
  or she intended to complete it might say, "Sorry, I just
  glitched".  2. vi. To commit a glitch.  See {gritch}.  3. vt.
  [Stanford] To scroll a display screen, esp. several lines at a
  time.  {{WAITS}} terminals used to do this in order to avoid
  continuous scrolling, which is distracting to the eye.  4. obs.
  Same as {magic cookie}, sense 2.

  All these uses of `glitch' derive from the specific technical
  meaning the term has to hardware people.  If the inputs of a
  circuit change, and the outputs change to some {random} value for
  some very brief time before they settle down to the correct value,
  then that is called a glitch.  This may or may not be harmful,
  depending on what the circuit is connected to.  This term is
  techspeak, found in electronics texts.

glob: /glob/, *not* /glohb/ [UNIX] vt.,n. To expand special
  characters in a wildcarded name, or the act of so doing (the action
  is also called `globbing').  The UNIX conventions for filename
  wildcarding have become sufficiently pervasive that many hackers
  use some of them in written English, especially in email or news on
  technical topics.  Those commonly encountered include the following:

    *
         wildcard for any string (see also {UN*X})

    ?
         wildcard for any character (generally read this way only at the
         beginning or in the middle of a word)

    []
         delimits a wildcard matching any of the enclosed characters

    {}
         alternation of comma-separated alternatives; thus, `foo{baz,qux}'
         would be read as `foobaz' or `fooqux'

  Some examples: "He said his name was [KC]arl" (expresses
  ambiguity).  "I don't read talk.politics.*" (any of the
  talk.politics subgroups on {USENET}).  Other examples are given
  under the entry for {X}.  Compare {regexp}.

  Historical note: The jargon usage derives from `glob', the
  name of a subprogram that expanded wildcards in archaic pre-Bourne
  versions of the UNIX shell.

glork: /glork/ 1. interj. Term of mild surprise, usually tinged with
  outrage, as when one attempts to save the results of 2 hours of
  editing and finds that the system has just crashed.  2. Used as a
  name for just about anything.  See {foo}.  3. vt. Similar to
  {glitch}, but usually used reflexively.  "My program just glorked
  itself."  See also {glark}.

glue: n. Generic term for any interface logic or protocol that
  connects two component blocks.  For example,  {Blue
  Glue} is IBM's SNA protocol, and hardware designers call anything
  used to connect large VLSI's or circuit blocks `glue logic'.

gnarly: /nar'lee/ adj. Both {obscure} and {hairy} in the
  sense of complex.  "{Yow}! --- the tuned assembler
  implementation of BitBlt is really gnarly!"  From a similar but
  less specific usage in surfer slang.

GNU: /gnoo/, *not* /noo/ 1. [acronym: `GNU's Not UNIX!',
  see {{recursive acronym}}] A UNIX-workalike development effort of
  the Free Software Foundation headed by Richard Stallman
  ([email protected]).  GNU EMACS and the GNU C compiler, two tools
  designed for this project, have become very popular in hackerdom
  and elsewhere.  The GNU project was designed partly to proselytize
  for RMS's position that information is community property and all
  software source should be shared.  One of its slogans is "Help
  stamp out software hoarding!"  Though this remains controversial
  (because it implicitly denies any right of designers to own,
  assign, and sell the results of their labors), many hackers who
  disagree with RMS have nevertheless cooperated to produce large
  amounts of high-quality software for free redistribution under the
  Free Software Foundation's imprimatur.  See {EMACS},
  {copyleft}, {General Public Virus}.  2. Noted UNIX hacker
  John Gilmore ([email protected]), founder of USENET's anarchic alt.*
  hierarchy.

GNUMACS: /gnoo'maks/ [contraction of `GNU EMACS'] Often-heard
  abbreviated name for the {GNU} project's flagship tool, {EMACS}.
  Used esp. in contrast with {GOSMACS}.

go flatline: [from cyberpunk SF, refers to flattening of EEG traces
  upon brain-death] vi., also adjectival `flatlined'. 1. To die,
  terminate, or fail, esp. irreversibly.  In hacker parlance, this is
  used of machines only, human death being considered somewhat too
  serious a matter to employ jargon-jokes.  2. To go completely
  quiescent; said of machines undergoing controlled shutdown.  "You
  can suffer file damage if you shut down UNIX but power off before
  the system has gone flatline."  3. Of a video tube, to fail by
  losing vertical scan, so all one sees is a bright horizontal line
  bisecting the screen.

go root: [UNIX] vi. To temporarily enter {root mode} in order
  to perform a privileged operation.  This use is deprecated in
  Australia, where v. `root' refers to animal sex.

go-faster stripes: [UK] Syn. {chrome}.

gobble: vt. To consume or to obtain.  The phrase `gobble up' tends to
  imply `consume', while `gobble down' tends to imply `obtain'.
  "The output spy gobbles characters out of a {tty} output buffer."
  "I guess I'll gobble down a copy of the documentation tomorrow."
  See also {snarf}.

Godzillagram: /god-zil'*-gram/ n. [from Japan's national hero]
  1. A network packet that in theory is a broadcast to every machine
  in the universe.  The typical case of this is an IP datagram whose
  destination IP address is [255.255.255.255].  Fortunately, few
  gateways are foolish enough to attempt to implement this!  2. A
  network packet of maximum size.  An IP Godzillagram has
  65,536 octets.

golden: adj. [prob. from folklore's `golden egg'] When used to
  describe a magnetic medium (e.g., `golden disk', `golden tape'),
  describes one containing a tested, up-to-spec, ready-to-ship
  software version.  Compare {platinum-iridium}.

golf-ball printer: n. The IBM 2741, a slow but letter-quality
  printing device and terminal based on the IBM Selectric typewriter.
  The `golf ball' was a round object bearing reversed embossed
  images of 88 different characters arranged on four meridians of
  latitude; one could change the font by swapping in a different golf
  ball.  This was the technology that enabled APL to use a
  non-EBCDIC, non-ASCII, and in fact completely non-standard
  character set.  This put it 10 years ahead of its time --- where it
  stayed, firmly rooted, for the next 20, until character displays
  gave way to programmable bit-mapped devices with the flexibility to
  support other character sets.

gonk: /gonk/ vt.,n. 1. To prevaricate or to embellish the truth
  beyond any reasonable recognition.  It is alleged that in German
  the term is (mythically) `gonken'; in Spanish the verb becomes
  `gonkar'.  "You're gonking me.  That story you just told me is a
  bunch of gonk."  In German, for example, "Du gonkst mir" (You're
  pulling my leg).  See also {gonkulator}.  2. [British] To grab some
  sleep at an odd time; compare {gronk out}.

gonkulator: /gon'kyoo-lay-tr/ [from the old "Hogan's Heroes" TV
  series] n. A pretentious piece of equipment that actually serves no
  useful purpose.  Usually used to describe one's least favorite
  piece of computer hardware.  See {gonk}.

gonzo: /gon'zoh/ [from Hunter S. Thompson] adj. Overwhelming;
  outrageous; over the top; very large, esp. used of collections of
  source code, source files, or individual functions.  Has some of the
  connotations of {moby} and {hairy}, but without the
  implication of obscurity or complexity.

Good Thing: n.,adj. Often capitalized; always pronounced as if
  capitalized.  1. Self-evidently wonderful to anyone in a position
  to notice: "The Trailblazer's 19.2Kbaud PEP mode with on-the-fly
  Lempel-Ziv compression is a Good Thing for sites relaying
  netnews."  2. Something that can't possibly have any ill
  side-effects and may save considerable grief later: "Removing the
  self-modifying code from that shared library would be a Good
  Thing."  3. When said of software tools or libraries, as in "YACC
  is a Good Thing", specifically connotes that the thing has
  drastically reduced a programmer's work load.  Oppose {Bad
  Thing}.

gorilla arm: n. The side-effect that destroyed touch-screens as a
  mainstream input technology despite a promising start in the early
  1980s.  It seems the designers of all those {spiffy} touch-menu
  systems failed to notice that humans aren't designed to hold their
  arms in front of their faces making small motions.  After more than
  a very few selections, the arm begins to feel sore, cramped, and
  oversized; hence `gorilla arm'.  This is now considered a classic
  cautionary tale to human-factors designers; "Remember the gorilla
  arm!" is shorthand for "How is this going to fly in *real*
  use?".

gorp: /gorp/ [CMU: perhaps from the canonical hiker's food, Good
  Old Raisins and Peanuts] Another metasyntactic variable, like
  {foo} and {bar}.

GOSMACS: /goz'maks/ [contraction of `Gosling EMACS'] n. The first
  {EMACS}-in-C implementation, predating but now largely eclipsed by
  {GNUMACS}.  Originally freeware; a commercial version is now
  modestly popular as `UniPress EMACS'.  The author (James Gosling)
  went on to invent {NeWS}.

Gosperism: /gos'p*r-izm/ A hack, invention, or saying by
  arch-hacker R. William (Bill) Gosper.  This notion merits its own
  term because there are so many of them.  Many of the entries in
  {HAKMEM} are Gosperisms; see also {life}.

gotcha: n. A {misfeature} of a system, especially a programming
  language or environment, that tends to breed bugs or mistakes because
  it behaves in an unexpected way.  For example, a classic gotcha in {C}
  is the fact that `if (a=b) {code;}' is syntactically valid
  and sometimes even correct.  It puts the value of `b' into `a'
  and then executes `code' if `a' is non-zero.  What the
  programmer probably meant was `if (a==b) {code;}',
  which executes `code' if `a' and `b' are equal.

GPL: /G-P-L/ n. Abbrev. for `General Public License' in
  widespread use; see {copyleft}.

GPV: /G-P-V/ n. Abbrev. for {General Public Virus} in
  widespread use.

grault: /grawlt/ n. Yet another meta-syntactic variable, invented by
  Mike Gallaher and propagated by the {GOSMACS} documentation.  See
  {corge}.

gray goo: n. A hypothetical substance composed of {sagan}s of
  sub-micron-sized self-replicating robots programmed to make copies
  of themselves out of whatever is available.  The image that goes
  with the term is one of the entire biosphere of Earth being
  eventually converted to robot goo.  This is the simplest of the
  {{nanotechnology}} disaster scenarios, easily refuted by arguments
  from energy requirements and elemental abundances.  Compare {blue
  goo}.

Great Renaming: n. The {flag day} on which all of the non-local
  groups on the {USENET} had their names changed from the net.-
  format to the current multiple-hierarchies scheme.

Great Runes: n. Uppercase-only text or display messages.  Some
  archaic operating systems still emit these.  See also {runes},
  {smash case}, {fold case}.

  Decades ago, back in the days when it was the sole supplier of
  long-distance hardcopy transmittal devices, the Teletype
  Corporation was faced with a major design choice.  To shorten code
  lengths and cut complexity in the printing mechanism, it had been
  decided that teletypes would use a monocase font, either ALL UPPER
  or all lower.  The question was, which one to choose.  A study was
  conducted on readability under various conditions of bad ribbon,
  worn print hammers, etc.  Lowercase won; it is less dense and has
  more distinctive letterforms, and is thus much easier to read both
  under ideal conditions and when the letters are mangled or partly
  obscured.  The results were filtered up through {management}.
  The chairman of Teletype killed the proposal because it failed one
  incredibly important criterion:

    "It would be impossible to spell the name of the Deity correctly."

  In this way (or so, at least, hacker folklore has it) superstition
  triumphed over utility.  Teletypes were the major input devices on
  most early computers, and terminal manufacturers looking for
  corners to cut naturally followed suit until well into the 1970s.
  Thus, that one bad call stuck us with Great Runes for thirty years.

great-wall: [from SF fandom] vi.,n. A mass expedition to an
  oriental restaurant, esp. one where food is served family-style
  and shared.  There is a common heuristic about the amount of food
  to order, expressed as "Get N - 1 entrees"; the value of N,
  which is the number of people in the group, can be inferred from
  context (see {N}).  See {{oriental food}}, {ravs},
  {stir-fried random}.

Green Book: n. 1. One of the three standard PostScript references:
  `PostScript Language Program Design', bylined `Adobe Systems'
  (Addison-Wesley, 1988; QA76.73.P67P66 ISBN; 0-201-14396-8); see
  also {Red Book}, {Blue Book}).  2. Informal name for one of
  the three standard references on SmallTalk: `Smalltalk-80:
  Bits of History, Words of Advice', by Glenn Krasner
  (Addison-Wesley, 1983; QA76.8.S635S58; ISBN 0-201-11669-3) (this,
  too, is associated with blue and red books).  3. The `X/Open
  Compatibility Guide'.  Defines an international standard {{UNIX}}
  environment that is a proper superset of POSIX/SVID; also includes
  descriptions of a standard utility toolkit, systems administrations
  features, and the like.  This grimoire is taken with particular
  seriousness in Europe.  See {Purple Book}.  4. The IEEE 1003.1
  POSIX Operating Systems Interface standard has been dubbed "The
  Ugly Green Book".  5. Any of the 1992 standards which will be
  issued by the CCITT's tenth plenary assembly.  Until now, these
  have changed color each review cycle (1984 was {Red Book}, 1988
  {Blue Book}); however, it is rumored that this convention is
  going to be dropped before 1992.  These include, among other
  things, the X.400 email standard and the Group 1 through 4 fax
  standards.  See also {{book titles}}.

green bytes: n. 1. Meta-information embedded in a file, such as
  the length of the file or its name; as opposed to keeping such
  information in a separate description file or record.  The term
  comes from an IBM user's group meeting (ca. 1962) at which these
  two approaches were being debated and the diagram of the file on
  the blackboard had the `green bytes' drawn in green.  2. By
  extension, the non-data bits in any self-describing format.  "A
  GIF file contains, among other things, green bytes describing the
  packing method for the image." Compare {out-of-band},
  {zigamorph}, {fence} (sense 1).

green card: n. [after the `IBM System/360 Reference Data'
  card] This is used for any summary of an assembly language, even if
  the color is not green.  Less frequently used now because of the
  decrease in the use of assembly language.  "I'll go get my green
  card so I can check the addressing mode for that instruction."
  Some green cards are actually booklets.

  The original green card became a yellow card when the System/370
  was introduced, and later a yellow booklet.  An anecdote from IBM
  refers to a scene that took place in a programmers' terminal room
  at Yorktown in 1978.  A luser overheard one of the programmers ask
  another "Do you have a green card?"  The other grunted and
  passed the first a thick yellow booklet.  At this point the luser
  turned a delicate shade of olive and rapidly left the room, never
  to return.  See also {card}.

green lightning: [IBM] n. 1. Apparently random flashing streaks on
  the face of 3278-9 terminals while a new symbol set is being
  downloaded.  This hardware bug was left deliberately unfixed, as
  some genius within IBM suggested it would let the user know that
  `something is happening'.  That, it certainly does.  Later
  microprocessor-driven IBM color graphics displays were actually
  *programmed* to produce green lightning!  2. [proposed] Any
  bug perverted into an alleged feature by adroit rationalization or
  marketing.  "Motorola calls the CISC cruft in the 88000
  architecture `compatibility logic', but I call it green
  lightning".  See also {feature}.

green machine: n. A computer or peripheral device that has been
  designed and built to military specifications for field equipment
  (that is, to withstand mechanical shock, extremes of temperature
  and humidity, and so forth).  Comes from the olive-drab `uniform'
  paint used for military equipment.

Green's Theorem: [TMRC] prov. For any story, in any group of people
  there will be at least one person who has not heard the story.
  [The name of this theorem is a play on a fundamental theorem in
  calculus. --- ESR]

grep: /grep/ [from the qed/ed editor idiom g/re/p , where
  re stands for a regular expression, to Globally search for the
  Regular Expression and Print the lines containing matches to it,
  via {{UNIX}} `grep(1)'] vt. To rapidly scan a file or file set
  looking for a particular string or pattern.  By extension, to look
  for something by pattern.  "Grep the bulletin board for the system
  backup schedule, would you?"  See also {vgrep}.

grind: vt. 1. [MIT and Berkeley] To format code, especially LISP
  code, by indenting lines so that it looks pretty.  This usage was
  associated with the MacLISP community and is now rare;
  {prettyprint} was and is the generic term for such
  operations.  2. [UNIX] To generate the formatted version of a
  document from the nroff, troff, TeX, or Scribe source.  The BSD
  program `vgrind(1)' grinds code for printing on a Versatec
  bitmapped printer.  3. To run seemingly interminably, esp. (but
  not necessarily) if performing some tedious and inherently useless
  task.  Similar to {crunch} or {grovel}.  Grinding has a
  connotation of using a lot of CPU time, but it is possible to grind
  a disk, network, etc.  See also {hog}.  4. To make the whole
  system slow.  "Troff really grinds a PDP-11."  5. `grind grind'
  excl. Roughly, "Isn't the machine slow today!"

grind crank: n. A mythical accessory to a terminal.  A crank on the
  side of a monitor, which when operated makes a zizzing noise and
  causes the computer to run faster.  Usually one does not refer to a
  grind crank out loud, but merely makes the appropriate gesture and
  noise.  See {grind} and {wugga wugga}.

  Historical note: At least one real machine actually had a grind
  crank --- the R1, a research machine built toward the end of the
  days of the great vacuum tube computers, in 1959.  R1 (also known as
  `The Rice Institute Computer' (TRIC) and later as `The Rice
  University Computer' (TRUC)) had a single-step/free-run switch for
  use when debugging programs.  Since single-stepping through a large
  program was rather tedious, there was also a crank with a cam and
  gear arrangement that repeatedly pushed the single-step button.
  This allowed one to `crank' through a lot of code, then slow down
  to single-step for a bit when you got near the code of interest, poke
  at some registers using the console typewriter, and then keep on
  cranking.

gritch: /grich/ 1. n. A complaint (often caused by a {glitch}).
  2. vi. To complain.  Often verb-doubled: "Gritch gritch".  3. A
  synonym for {glitch} (as verb or noun).

grok: /grok/, var. /grohk/ [from the novel `Stranger in
  a Strange Land', by Robert A. Heinlein, where it is a Martian word
  meaning literally `to drink' and metaphorically `to be one
  with'] vt. 1. To understand, usually in a global sense.  Connotes
  intimate and exhaustive knowledge.  Contrast {zen}, similar
  supernal understanding as a single brief flash.  See also
  {glark}.  2. Used of programs, may connote merely sufficient
  understanding.  "Almost all C compilers grok the `void' type
  these days."

gronk: /gronk/ [popularized by Johnny Hart's comic strip
  "B.C." but the word apparently predates that] vt. 1. To
  clear the state of a wedged device and restart it.  More severe
  than `to {frob}'.  2. [TMRC] To cut, sever, smash, or
  similarly disable.  3. The sound made by many 3.5-inch diskette
  drives.  In particular, the microfloppies on a Commodore Amiga go
  "grink, gronk".

gronk out: vi. To cease functioning.  Of people, to go home and go
  to sleep.  "I guess I'll gronk out now; see you all tomorrow."

gronked: adj. 1. Broken.  "The teletype scanner was gronked, so
  we took the system down."  2. Of people, the condition of feeling
  very tired or (less commonly) sick.  "I've been chasing that bug
  for 17 hours now and I am thoroughly gronked!"  Compare
  {broken}, which means about the same as {gronk} used of
  hardware, but connotes depression or mental/emotional problems in
  people.

grovel: vi. 1. To work interminably and without apparent progress.
  Often used transitively with `over' or `through'.  "The file
  scavenger has been groveling through the file directories for 10
  minutes now."  Compare {grind} and {crunch}.  Emphatic form:
  `grovel obscenely'.  2. To examine minutely or in complete detail.
  "The compiler grovels over the entire source program before
  beginning to translate it."  "I grovelled through all the
  documentation, but I still couldn't find the command I wanted."

grunge: /gruhnj/ n. 1. That which is grungy, or that which makes
  it so.  2. [Cambridge] Code which is inaccessible due to changes in
  other parts of the program.  The preferred term in North America is
  {dead code}.

gubbish: /guhb'*sh/ [a portmanteau of `garbage' and `rubbish'?]
  n. Garbage; crap; nonsense.  "What is all this gubbish?"  The
  opposite portmanteau `rubbage' is also reported.

guiltware: /gilt'weir/ n. 1. A piece of {freeware} decorated
  with a message telling one how long and hard the author worked on
  it and intimating that one is a no-good freeloader if one does not
  immediately send the poor suffering martyr gobs of money.
  2. {Shareware} that works.

gumby: /guhm'bee/ [from a class of Monty Python characters, poss.
  themselves named after the 1960s claymation character] n. An act of
  minor but conspicuous stupidity, often in `gumby maneuver' or
  `pull a gumby'.

gun: [ITS: from the `:GUN' command] vt. To forcibly
  terminate a program or job (computer, not career).  "Some idiot
  left a background process running soaking up half the cycles, so I
  gunned it."  Compare {can}.

gunch: /guhnch/ [TMRC] vt. To push, prod, or poke at a device
  that has almost produced the desired result.  Implies a threat to
  {mung}.

gurfle: /ger'fl/ interj. An expression of shocked disbelief.  "He
  said we have to recode this thing in FORTRAN by next week.
  Gurfle!"  Compare {weeble}.

guru: n. 1. [UNIX] An expert.  Implies not only {wizard} skill
  but also a history of being a knowledge resource for others.  Less
  often, used (with a qualifier) for other experts on other systems,
  as in `VMS guru'.  See {source of all good bits}.  2. Amiga
  equivalent of `panic' in UNIX.  When the system crashes, a
  cryptic message "GURU MEDITATION #XXXXXXXX.YYYYYYYY" appears,
  indicating what the problem was.  An Amiga guru can figure things
  out from the numbers.  Generally a {guru} event must be followed
  by a {Vulcan nerve pinch}.

= H =
=====

h: [from SF fandom] infix. A method of `marking' common words,
  i.e., calling attention to the fact that they are being used in a
  nonstandard, ironic, or humorous way.  Originated in the fannish
  catchphrase "Bheer is the One True Ghod!" from decades ago.
  H-infix marking of `Ghod' and other words spread into the 1960s
  counterculture via underground comix, and into early hackerdom
  either from the counterculture or from SF fandom (the three overlapped
  heavily at the time).  More recently, the h infix has become an
  expected feature of benchmark names (Dhrystone, Rhealstone,
  etc.); this is prob. patterning on the original Whetstone (the name
  of a laboratory) but influenced by the fannish/counterculture
  h infix.

ha ha only serious: [from SF fandom, orig. as mutation of HHOK,
  `Ha Ha Only Kidding'] A phrase (often seen abbreviated as HHOS)
  that aptly captures the flavor of much hacker discourse.  Applied
  especially to parodies, absurdities, and ironic jokes that are both
  intended and perceived to contain a possibly disquieting amount of
  truth, or truths that are constructed on in-joke and self-parody.
  This lexicon contains many examples of ha-ha-only-serious in both
  form and content.  Indeed, the entirety of hacker culture is often
  perceived as ha-ha-only-serious by hackers themselves; to take it
  either too lightly or too seriously marks a person as an outsider,
  a {wannabee}, or in {larval stage}.  For further
  enlightenment on this subject, consult any Zen master.  See also
  {{Humor, Hacker}}, and {AI koans}.

hack: 1. n. Originally, a quick job that produces what is needed,
  but not well.  2. n. An incredibly good, and perhaps very
  time-consuming, piece of work that produces exactly what is needed.
  3. vt. To bear emotionally or physically.  "I can't hack this
  heat!"  4. vt. To work on something (typically a program).  In an
  immediate sense: "What are you doing?"  "I'm hacking TECO."
  In a general (time-extended) sense: "What do you do around here?"
  "I hack TECO."  More generally, "I hack `foo'" is roughly
  equivalent to "`foo' is my major interest (or project)".  "I
  hack solid-state physics."  5. vt. To pull a prank on.  See
  sense 2 and {hacker} (sense 5).  6. vi. To interact with a
  computer in a playful and exploratory rather than goal-directed
  way.  "Whatcha up to?"  "Oh, just hacking."  7. n. Short for
  {hacker}.  8. See {nethack}.

  Constructions on this term abound.  They include `happy
  hacking' (a farewell), `how's hacking?' (a friendly greeting
  among hackers) and `hack, hack' (a fairly content-free but
  friendly comment, often used as a temporary farewell).  For more on
  the meaning of hack see appendix A.  See also {neat hack},
  {real hack}.

hack attack: [poss. by analogy with `Big Mac Attack' from ads
  for the McDonald's fast-food chain; the variant `big hack attack'
  is reported] n. Nearly synonymous with {hacking run}, though the
  latter more strongly implies an all-nighter.

hack mode: n. 1. What one is in when hacking, of course.  2. More
  specifically, a Zen-like state of total focus on The Problem that
  may be achieved when one is hacking (this is why every good hacker
  is part mystic).  Ability to enter such concentration at will
  correlates strongly with wizardliness; it is one of the most
  important skills learned during {larval stage}.  Sometimes
  amplified as `deep hack mode'.

  Being yanked out of hack mode (see {priority interrupt}) may be
  experienced as a physical shock, and the sensation of being in it
  is more than a little habituating.  The intensity of this
  experience is probably by itself sufficient explanation for the
  existence of hackers, and explains why many resist being promoted
  out of positions where they can code.  See also {cyberspace}
  (sense 2).

  Some aspects of hackish etiquette will appear quite odd to an
  observer unaware of the high value placed on hack mode.  For
  example, if someone appears at your door, it is perfectly okay to
  hold up a hand (without turning one's eyes away from the screen) to
  avoid being interrupted.  One may read, type, and interact with the
  computer for quite some time before further acknowledging the
  other's presence (of course, he or she is reciprocally free to
  leave without a word).  The understanding is that you might be in
  {hack mode} with a lot of delicate {state} (sense 2) in your
  head, and you dare not {swap} that context out until you have
  reached a good point to pause. See also {juggling eggs}.

hack on: vt. To {hack}; implies that the subject is some
  pre-existing hunk of code that one is evolving, as opposed to
  something one might {hack up}.

hack together: vt. To throw something together so it will work.
  Unlike `kluge together' or {cruft together}, this does not
  necessarily have negative connotations.

hack up: vt. To {hack}, but generally implies that the result is
  a hack in sense 1 (a quick hack).  Contrast this with {hack on}.
  To `hack up on' implies a {quick-and-dirty} modification to an
  existing system.  Contrast {hacked up}; compare {kluge up},
  {monkey up}, {cruft together}.

hack value: n. Often adduced as the reason or motivation for
  expending effort toward a seemingly useless goal, the point being
  that the accomplished goal is a hack.  For example, MacLISP had
  features for reading and printing Roman numerals, which were
  installed purely for hack value.  See {display hack} for one
  method of computing hack value, but this cannot really be
  explained.  As a great artist once said of jazz: "If you hafta ask,
  you ain't never goin' to find out."

hack-and-slay: v. (also `hack-and-slash') 1. To play a {MUD}
  or go mudding, especially with the intention of {berserking} for
  pleasure.  2. To undertake an all-night programming/hacking
  session, interspersed with stints of mudding as a change of pace.
  This term arose on the British academic network amongst students
  who worked nights and logged onto Essex University's MUDs during
  public-access hours (2 A.M. to 7 A.M.).  Usually more
  mudding than work was done in these sessions.

hacked off: [analogous to `pissed off'] adj. Said of system
  administrators who have become annoyed, upset, or touchy owing to
  suspicions that their sites have been or are going to be victimized
  by crackers, or used for inappropriate, technically illegal, or
  even overtly criminal activities.  For example, having unreadable
  files in your home directory called `worm', `lockpick', or `goroot'
  would probably be an effective (as well as impressively obvious and
  stupid) way to get your sysadmin hacked off at you.

hacked up: adj. Sufficiently patched, kluged, and tweaked that the
  surgical scars are beginning to crowd out normal tissue (compare
  {critical mass}).  Not all programs that are hacked become
  `hacked up'; if modifications are done with some eye to coherence
  and continued maintainability, the software may emerge better for
  the experience.  Contrast {hack up}.

hacker: [originally, someone who makes furniture with an axe] n.
  1. A person who enjoys exploring the details of programmable
  systems and how to stretch their capabilities, as opposed to most
  users, who prefer to learn only the minimum necessary.  2. One who
  programs enthusiastically (even obsessively) or who enjoys
  programming rather than just theorizing about programming.  3. A
  person capable of appreciating {hack value}.  4. A person who is
  good at programming quickly.  5. An expert at a particular program,
  or one who frequently does work using it or on it; as in `a UNIX
  hacker'.  (Definitions 1 through 5 are correlated, and people who fit
  them congregate.)  6. An expert or enthusiast of any kind.  One
  might be an astronomy hacker, for example.  7. One who enjoys the
  intellectual challenge of creatively overcoming or circumventing
  limitations.  8. [deprecated] A malicious meddler who tries to
  discover sensitive information by poking around.  Hence `password
  hacker', `network hacker'.  See {cracker}.

  It is better to be described as a hacker by others than to describe
  oneself that way.  Hackers consider themselves something of an
  elite (a meritocracy based on ability), though one to which new
  members are gladly welcome.  There is thus a certain ego
  satisfaction to be had in identifying yourself as a hacker (but if
  you claim to be one and are not, you'll quickly be labeled
  {bogus}).

hacking run: [analogy with `bombing run' or `speed run'] n. A
  hack session extended long outside normal working times, especially
  one longer than 12 hours.  May cause you to `change phase the hard
  way' (see {phase}).

Hacking X for Y: [ITS] n. The information ITS made publicly
  available about each user (the INQUIR record) was a sort of form in
  which the user could fill out fields.  On display, two of these
  fields were combined into a project description of the form
  "Hacking X for Y" (e.g., `"Hacking perceptrons for
  Minsky"').  This form of description became traditional and has
  since been carried over to other systems with more general
  facilities for self-advertisement (such as UNIX {plan file}s).

Hackintosh: n. 1. An Apple Lisa that has been hacked into emulating a
  Macintosh (also called a `Mac XL').  2. A Macintosh assembled
  from parts theoretically belonging to different models in the line.

hackish: /hak'ish/ adj. (also {hackishness} n.) 1. Said of
  something that is or involves a hack.  2. Of or pertaining to
  hackers or the hacker subculture.  See also {true-hacker}.

hackishness: n. The quality of being or involving a hack.  This
  term is considered mildly silly.  Syn.  {hackitude}.

hackitude: n. Syn. {hackishness}; this word is considered sillier.

hair: [back-formation from {hairy}] n. The complications that
  make something hairy.  "Decoding {TECO} commands requires a
  certain amount of hair."  Often seen in the phrase `infinite
  hair', which connotes extreme complexity.  Also in `hairiferous'
  (tending to promote hair growth): "GNUMACS Elisp encourages lusers
  to write complex editing modes."  "Yeah, it's pretty hairiferous
  all right." (or just: "Hair squared!")

hairy: adj. 1. Annoyingly complicated.  "{DWIM} is incredibly
  hairy."  2. Incomprehensible.  "{DWIM} is incredibly hairy."
  3. Of people, high-powered, authoritative, rare, expert, and/or
  incomprehensible.  Hard to explain except in context: "He knows
  this hairy lawyer who says there's nothing to worry about."  See
  also {hirsute}.

HAKMEM: /hak'mem/ n. MIT AI Memo 239 (February 1972).  A
  legendary collection of neat mathematical and programming hacks
  contributed by many people at MIT and elsewhere.  (The title of the
  memo really is "HAKMEM", which is a 6-letterism for `hacks
  memo'.)  Some of them are very useful techniques, powerful
  theorems, or interesting unsolved problems, but most fall into the
  category of mathematical and computer trivia.  Here is a sampling
  of the entries (with authors), slightly paraphrased:

  Item 41 (Gene Salamin): There are exactly 23,000 prime numbers less
  than 2^18.

  Item 46 (Rich Schroeppel): The most *probable* suit
  distribution in bridge hands is 4-4-3-2, as compared to 4-3-3-3,
  which is the most *evenly* distributed.  This is because the
  world likes to have unequal numbers: a thermodynamic effect saying
  things will not be in the state of lowest energy, but in the state
  of lowest disordered energy.

  Item 81 (Rich Schroeppel): Count the magic squares of order 5
  (that is, all the 5-by-5 arrangements of the numbers from 1 to 25
  such that all rows, columns, and diagonals add up to the same
  number).  There are about 320 million, not counting those that
  differ only by rotation and reflection.

  Item 154 (Bill Gosper): The myth that any given programming language is
  machine independent is easily exploded by computing the sum of
  powers of 2.  If the result loops with period = 1 with
  sign +, you are on a sign-magnitude machine.  If the result
  loops with period = 1 at -1, you are on a
  twos-complement machine.  If the result loops with period greater
  than 1, including the beginning, you are on a ones-complement
  machine.  If the result loops with period greater than 1, not
  including the beginning, your machine isn't binary --- the pattern
  should tell you the base.  If you run out of memory, you are on a
  string or bignum system.  If arithmetic overflow is a fatal error,
  some fascist pig with a read-only mind is trying to enforce machine
  independence.  But the very ability to trap overflow is machine
  dependent.  By this strategy, consider the universe, or, more
  precisely, algebra: Let X = the sum of many powers of 2 =
  ...111111.  Now add X to itself:
  X + X = ...111110 Thus, 2X = X - 1, so
  X = -1.  Therefore algebra is run on a machine (the
  universe) that is two's-complement.

  Item 174 (Bill Gosper and Stuart Nelson): 21963283741 is the only
  number such that if you represent it on the {PDP-10} as both an
  integer and a floating-point number, the bit patterns of the two
  representations are identical.

  Item 176 (Gosper): The "banana phenomenon" was encountered when
  processing a character string by taking the last 3 letters typed
  out, searching for a random occurrence of that sequence in the
  text, taking the letter following that occurrence, typing it out,
  and iterating.  This ensures that every 4-letter string output
  occurs in the original.  The program typed BANANANANANANANA....  We
  note an ambiguity in the phrase, "the Nth occurrence of."  In one
  sense, there are five 00's in 0000000000; in another, there are
  nine.  The editing program TECO finds five.  Thus it finds only the
  first ANA in BANANA, and is thus obligated to type N next.  By
  Murphy's Law, there is but one NAN, thus forcing A, and thus a
  loop.  An option to find overlapped instances would be useful,
  although it would require backing up N - 1 characters before
  seeking the next N-character string.

  Note: This last item refers to a {Dissociated Press}
  implementation.  See also {banana problem}.

  HAKMEM also contains some rather more complicated mathematical and
  technical items, but these examples show some of its fun flavor.

hakspek: /hak'speek/ n. A shorthand method of spelling found on
  many British academic bulletin boards and {talker system}s.
  Syllables and whole words in a sentence are replaced by single
  ASCII characters the names of which are phonetically similar or
  equivalent, while multiple letters are usually dropped.  Hence,
  `for' becomes `4'; `two', `too', and `to' become `2'; `ck'
  becomes `k'.  "Before I see you tomorrow" becomes "b4 i c u
  2moro".  First appeared in London about 1986, and was probably
  caused by the slowness of available talker systems, which
  operated on archaic machines with outdated operating systems and
  no standard methods of communication.  Has become rarer since.
  See also {talk mode}.

hamster: n. 1. [Fairchild] A particularly slick little piece of code
  that does one thing well; a small, self-contained hack.  The image
  is of a hamster happily spinning its exercise wheel.  2. [UK] Any item
  of hardware made by Amstrad, a company famous for its cheap
  plastic PC-almost-compatibles.

hand-hacking: n. 1. The practice of translating {hot spot}s from
  an {HLL} into hand-tuned assembler, as opposed to trying to
  coerce the compiler into generating better code.  Both the term and
  the practice are becoming uncommon.  See {tune}, {bum}, {by
  hand}; syn.  with v. {cruft}.  2. More generally, manual
  construction or patching of data sets that would normally be
  generated by a translation utility and interpreted by another
  program, and aren't really designed to be read or modified by
  humans.

handshaking: n. Hardware or software activity designed to start or
  keep two machines or programs in synchronization as they {do
  protocol}.  Often applied to human activity; thus, a hacker might
  watch two people in conversation nodding their heads to indicate
  that they have heard each others' points and say "Oh, they're
  handshaking!".  See also {protocol}.

handwave: [poss. from gestures characteristic of stage magicians]
  1. v. To gloss over a complex point; to distract a listener; to
  support a (possibly actually valid) point with blatantly faulty
  logic.  2. n. The act of handwaving.  "Boy, what a handwave!"

  If someone starts a sentence with "Clearly..." or
  "Obviously..." or "It is self-evident that...", it is
  a good bet he is about to handwave (alternatively, use of these
  constructions in a sarcastic tone before a paraphrase of someone
  else's argument suggests that it is a handwave).  The theory behind
  this term is that if you wave your hands at the right moment, the
  listener may be sufficiently distracted to not notice that what you
  have said is {bogus}.  Failing that, if a listener does object,
  you might try to dismiss the objection with a wave of your hand.

  The use of this word is often accompanied by gestures: both hands
  up, palms forward, swinging the hands in a vertical plane pivoting
  at the elbows and/or shoulders (depending on the magnitude of the
  handwave); alternatively, holding the forearms in one position
  while rotating the hands at the wrist to make them flutter.  In
  context, the gestures alone can suffice as a remark; if a speaker
  makes an outrageously unsupported assumption, you might simply wave
  your hands in this way, as an accusation, far more eloquent than
  words could express, that his logic is faulty.

hang: v. 1. To wait for an event that will never occur.  "The
  system is hanging because it can't read from the crashed drive".
  See {wedged}, {hung}.  2. To wait for some event to occur; to
  hang around until something happens.  "The program displays a menu
  and then hangs until you type a character."  Compare {block}.
  3. To attach a peripheral device, esp. in the construction `hang
  off':  "We're going to hang another tape drive off the file
  server."  Implies a device attached with cables, rather than
  something that is strictly inside the machine's chassis.

Hanlon's Razor: prov. A corollary of {Finagle's Law}, similar to
  Occam's Razor, that reads "Never attribute to malice that which can
  be adequately explained by stupidity."  The derivation of the
  common title Hanlon's Razor is unknown; a similar epigram has been
  attributed to William James.  Quoted here because it seems to be a
  particular favorite of hackers, often showing up in {fortune
  cookie} files and the login banners of BBS systems and commercial
  networks.  This probably reflects the hacker's daily experience of
  environments created by well-intentioned but short-sighted people.

happily: adv.  Of software, used to emphasize that a program is
  unaware of some important fact about its environment, either
  because it has been fooled into believing a lie, or because it
  doesn't care.  The sense of `happy' here is not that of elation,
  but rather that of blissful ignorance.  "The program continues to
  run, happily unaware that its output is going to /dev/null."

hard boot: n. See {boot}.

hardcoded: adj. 1. Said of data inserted directly into a program,
  where it cannot be easily modified, as opposed to data in some
  {profile}, resource (see {de-rezz} sense 2), or environment
  variable that a {user} or hacker can easily modify.  2. In C,
  this is esp. applied to use of a literal instead of a
  `#define' macro (see {magic number}).

hardwarily: /hard-weir'*-lee/ adv. In a way pertaining to
  hardware.  "The system is hardwarily unreliable."  The adjective
  `hardwary' is *not* traditionally used, though it has recently
  been reported from the U.K.  See {softwarily}.

hardwired: adj. 1. In software, syn. for {hardcoded}.  2. By
  extension, anything that is not modifiable, especially in the sense
  of customizable to one's particular needs or tastes.

has the X nature: [seems to derive from Zen Buddhist koans of the
  form "Does an X have the Buddha-nature?"] adj. Common hacker
  construction for `is an X', used for humorous emphasis.  "Anyone
  who can't even use a program with on-screen help embedded in it
  truly has the {loser} nature!"  See also {the X that can be Y
  is not the true X}.

hash bucket: n. A notional receptacle into which more than one
  thing accessed by the same key or short code might be dropped.
  When you look up a name in the phone book (for example), you
  typically hash it by extracting its first letter; the hash buckets
  are the alphabetically ordered letter sections.  This is used as
  techspeak with respect to code that uses actual hash functions; in
  jargon, it is used for human associative memory as well.  Thus, two
  things `in the same hash bucket' may be confused with each other.
  "If you hash English words only by length, you get too many common
  grammar words in the first couple of hash buckets." Compare {hash
  collision}.

hash collision: [from the technical usage] n. (var. `hash
  clash') When used of people, signifies a confusion in associative
  memory or imagination, especially a persistent one (see
  {thinko}).  True story: One of us [ESR] was once on the phone
  with a friend about to move out to Berkeley.  When asked what he
  expected Berkeley to be like, the friend replied: "Well, I have
  this mental picture of naked women throwing Molotov cocktails, but
  I think that's just a collision in my hash tables."  Compare
  {hash bucket}.

hat: n. Common (spoken) name for the circumflex (`^', ASCII
  1011110) character.  See {ASCII} for other synonyms.

HCF: /H-C-F/ n. Mnemonic for `Halt and Catch Fire', any of
  several undocumented and semi-mythical machine instructions with
  destructive side-effects, supposedly included for test purposes on
  several well-known architectures going as far back as the IBM 360.
  The MC6800 microprocessor was the first for which the HCF opcode
  became widely known.  This instruction caused the processor to
  {toggle} a subset of the bus lines as rapidly as it could; in
  some configurations this can actually cause lines to burn
  up.

heads down: [Sun] adj. Concentrating, usually so heavily and for so
  long that everything outside the focus area is missed.  See also
  {hack mode} and {larval stage}, although it is not confined to
  fledgling hackers.

heartbeat: n. 1. The signal emitted by a Level 2 Ethernet
  transceiver at the end of every packet to show that the
  collision-detection circuit is still connected.  2. A periodic
  synchronization signal used by software or hardware, such as a bus
  clock or a periodic interrupt.  3. The `natural' oscillation
  frequency of a computer's clock crystal, before frequency division
  down to the machine's clock rate.  4. A signal emitted at regular
  intervals by software to demonstrate that it is still alive.
  Sometimes hardware is designed to reboot the machine if it stops
  hearing a heartbeat.  See also {breath-of-life packet}.

heavy metal: [Cambridge] n. Syn. {big iron}.

heavy wizardry: n. Code or designs that trade on a particularly
  intimate knowledge or experience of a particular operating system
  or language or complex application interface.  Distinguished from
  {deep magic}, which trades more on arcane *theoretical*
  knowledge.  Writing device drivers is heavy wizardry; so is
  interfacing to {X} (sense 2) without a toolkit.  Esp. found in
  comments similar to "Heavy wizardry begins here ...".  Compare
  {voodoo programming}.

heavyweight: adj. High-overhead; {baroque}; code-intensive;
  featureful, but costly.  Esp. used of communication protocols,
  language designs, and any sort of implementation in which maximum
  generality and/or ease of implementation has been pushed at the
  expense of mundane considerations such as speed, memory utilization,
  and startup time.  {EMACS} is a heavyweight editor; {X} is an
  *extremely* heavyweight window system.  This term isn't
  pejorative, but one man's heavyweight is another's {elephantine}
  and a third's {monstrosity}.  Oppose `lightweight'.

heisenbug: /hi:'zen-buhg/ [from Heisenberg's Uncertainty
  Principle in quantum physics] n. A bug that disappears or alters
  its behavior when one attempts to probe or isolate it.  Antonym of
  {Bohr bug}; see also {mandelbug}.  In C, nine out of ten heisenbugs
  result from either {fandango on core} phenomena (esp. lossage
  related to corruption of the malloc {arena}) or errors that
  {smash the stack}.

Helen Keller mode: n. State of a hardware or software system that
  is deaf, dumb, and blind, i.e., accepting no input and generating no
  output, usually due to an infinite loop or some other excursion
  into {deep space}.  (Unfair to the real Helen Keller, whose
  success at learning speech was triumphant.)  See also
  {go flatline}, {catatonic}.

hello, sailor!: interj. Occasional West Coast equivalent of
  {hello, world}; seems to have originated at SAIL, later
  associated with the game {Zork} (which also included "hello,
  aviator" and "hello, implementor").  Originally from the
  traditional hooker's greeting to a swabbie fresh off the boat, of
  course.

hello, wall!: excl. See {wall}.

hello, world: interj. 1. The canonical minimal test message in the
  C/UNIX universe.  2. Any of the minimal programs that emit this
  message.  Traditionally, the first program a C coder is supposed to
  write in a new environment is one that just prints "hello, world"
  to standard output (and indeed it is the first example program
  in {K&R}).  Environments that generate an unreasonably large
  executable for this trivial test or which require a {hairy}
  compiler-linker invocation to generate it are considered to
  {lose} (see {X}).  3. Greeting uttered by a hacker making an
  entrance or requesting information from anyone present.  "Hello,
  world!  Is the {VAX} back up yet?"

hex: n. 1. Short for {{hexadecimal}}, base 16.  2. A 6-pack
  of anything (compare {quad}, sense 2).  Neither usage has
  anything to do with {magic} or {black art}, though the pun is
  appreciated and occasionally used by hackers.  True story: As a
  joke, some hackers once offered some surplus ICs for sale to be
  worn as protective amulets against hostile magic.  The chips were,
  of course, hex inverters.

hexadecimal:: n. Base 16.  Coined in the early 1960s to replace
  earlier `sexadecimal', which was too racy and amusing for stuffy
  IBM, and later adopted by the rest of the industry.

  Actually, neither term is etymologically pure.  If we take `binary'
  to be paradigmatic, the most etymologically correct term for
  base 10, for example, is `denary', which
  comes from `deni' (ten at a time, ten each), a Latin `distributive'
  number; the corresponding term for base-16 would be something like
  `sendenary'.  `Decimal' is from an ordinal number; the
  corresponding prefix for 6 would imply something like
  `sextidecimal'.  The `sexa-' prefix is Latin but incorrect in this
  context, and `hexa-' is Greek.  The word `octal' is similarly
  incorrect; a correct form would be `octaval' (to go with decimal),
  or `octonary' (to go with binary).  If anyone ever implements a
  base-3 computer, computer scientists will be faced with the
  unprecedented dilemma of a choice between two *correct* forms;
  both `ternary' and `trinary' have a claim to this throne.

hexit: /hek'sit/ n. A hexadecimal digit (0--9, and A--F or a--f).
  Used by people who claim that there are only *ten* digits,
  dammit; sixteen-fingered human beings are rather rare, despite what
  some keyboard designs might seem to imply (see {space-cadet
  keyboard}).

hidden flag: [scientific computation] n. An extra option added to a
  routine without changing the calling sequence.  For example,
  instead of adding an explicit input variable to instruct a routine
  to give extra diagnostic output, the programmer might just add a
  test for some otherwise meaningless feature of the existing inputs,
  such as a negative mass.  Liberal use of hidden flags can make a
  program very hard to debug and understand.

high bit: [from `high-order bit'] n. 1. The most significant
  bit in a byte.  2. By extension, the most significant part of
  something other than a data byte: "Spare me the whole {saga},
  just give me the high bit."  See also {meta bit}, {hobbit},
  {dread high-bit disease}, and compare the mainstream slang
  `bottom line'.

high moby: /hi:' mohb'ee/ n. The high half of a 512K {PDP-10}'s
  physical address space; the other half was of course the low moby.  This
  usage has been generalized in a way that has outlasted the
  {PDP-10}; for example, at the 1990 Washington D.C. Area Science
  Fiction Conclave (Disclave), when a miscommunication resulted in two
  separate wakes being held in commemoration of the shutdown of MIT's
  last {{ITS}} machines, the one on the upper floor was dubbed the
  `high moby' and the other the `low moby'.  All parties involved
  {grok}ked this instantly.  See {moby}.

highly: [scientific computation] adv. The preferred modifier for
  overstating an understatement.  As in: `highly nonoptimal', the
  worst possible way to do something; `highly nontrivial', either
  impossible or requiring a major research project; `highly
  nonlinear', completely erratic and unpredictable; `highly
  nontechnical', drivel written for {luser}s, oversimplified to the
  point of being misleading or incorrect (compare {drool-proof
  paper}).  In other computing cultures, postfixing of {in the
  extreme} might be preferred.

hirsute: adj. Occasionally used humorously as a synonym for {hairy}.

HLL: /H-L-L/ n. [High-Level Language (as opposed to assembler)]
  Found primarily in email and news rather than speech.  Rarely, the
  variants `VHLL' and `MLL' are found.  VHLL stands for `Very-High-Level
  Language' and is used to describe a {bondage-and-discipline
  language} that the speaker happens to like; Prolog and Backus's FP
  are often called VHLLs.  `MLL' stands for `Medium-Level Language' and is
  sometimes used half-jokingly to describe {C}, alluding to its
  `structured-assembler' image.  See also {languages of choice}.

hobbit: n. 1. The High Order Bit of a byte; same as the {meta
  bit} or {high bit}.  2. The non-ITS name of [email protected]
  (*Hobbit*), master of lasers.

hog: n.,vt. 1. Favored term to describe programs or hardware that
  seem to eat far more than their share of a system's resources,
  esp. those which noticeably degrade interactive response.
  *Not* used of programs that are simply extremely large or
  complex or that are merely painfully slow themselves (see {pig,
  run like a}).  More often than not encountered in qualified forms,
  e.g., `memory hog', `core hog', `hog the processor', `hog
  the disk'.  "A controller that never gives up the I/O bus
  gets killed after the bus-hog timer expires."   2. Also said
  of *people* who use more than their fair share of resources
  (particularly disk, where it seems that 10% of the people use 90%
  of the disk, no matter how big the disk is or how many people use
  it).  Of course, once disk hogs fill up one filesystem, they
  typically find some other new one to infect, claiming to the
  sysadmin that they have an important new project to complete.

holy wars: [from {USENET}, but may predate it] n. {flame
  war}s over {religious issues}.  The paper by Danny Cohen that
  popularized the terms {big-endian} and {little-endian} in
  connection with the LSB-first/MSB-first controversy was entitled
  "On Holy Wars and a Plea for Peace".  Other perennial Holy
  Wars have included {EMACS} vs. {vi}, my personal computer vs.
  everyone else's personal computer, {{ITS}} vs. {{UNIX}},
  {{UNIX}} vs. {VMS}, {BSD} UNIX vs. {USG UNIX}, {C} vs.
  {{Pascal}}, {C} vs. {LISP}, etc., ad nauseam.  The
  characteristic that distinguishes {holy wars} from normal
  technical disputes is that in a holy wars most of the participants
  spend their time trying to pass off personal value choices and
  cultural attachments as objective technical evaluations. See also
  {theology}.

home box: n. A hacker's personal machine, especially one he or she
  owns.  "Yeah?  Well, *my* home box runs a full 4.2 BSD, so
  there!"

hook: n. A software or hardware feature included in order to
  simplify later additions or changes by a user.  For example,
  a simple program that prints numbers might always print them in
  base 10, but a more flexible version would let a variable
  determine what base to use; setting the variable to 5 would make
  the program print numbers in base 5.  The variable is a simple
  hook.  An even more flexible program might examine the variable
  and treat a value of 16 or less as the base to use, but treat any
  other number as the address of a user-supplied routine for printing
  a number.  This is a {hairy} but powerful hook; one can then write a
  routine to print numbers as Roman numerals, say, or as Hebrew
  characters, and plug it into the program through the hook.  Often
  the difference between a good program and a superb one is that the
  latter has useful hooks in judiciously chosen places.  Both may do
  the original job about equally well, but the one with the hooks is
  much more flexible for future expansion of capabilities ({EMACS},
  for example, is *all* hooks).  The term `user exit' is
  synonymous but much more formal and less hackish.

hop: n. One file transmission in a series required to get a file
  from point A to point B on a store-and-forward network.  On such
  networks (including {UUCPNET} and {FidoNet}), the important
  inter-machine metric is the number of hops in the shortest path
  between them, rather than their geographical separation.  See
  {bang path}.

hose: 1. vt. To make non-functional or greatly degraded in
  performance.  "That big ray-tracing program really hoses the
  system."  See {hosed}.  2. n. A narrow channel through which
  data flows under pressure.  Generally denotes data paths that
  represent performance bottlenecks.  3. n. Cabling, especially
  thick Ethernet cable.  This is sometimes called `bit hose' or
  `hosery' (play on `hosiery') or `etherhose'.  See also
  {washing machine}.

hosed: adj. Same as {down}.  Used primarily by UNIX hackers.
  Humorous: also implies a condition thought to be relatively easy to
  reverse.  Probably derived from the Canadian slang `hoser'
  popularized by the Bob and Doug Mackenzie skits on SCTV.  See
  {hose}.  It is also widely used of people in the mainstream sense
  of `in an extremely unfortunate situation'.

  Once upon a time, a Cray that had been experiencing periodic
  difficulties crashed, and it was announced to have been hosed.
  It was discovered that the crash was due to the disconnection of
  some coolant hoses.  The problem was corrected, and users were then
  assured that everything was OK because the system had been rehosed.
  See also {dehose}.

hot spot: n. 1. [primarily used by C/UNIX programmers, but
  spreading] It is received wisdom that in most programs, less than
  10% of the code eats 90% of the execution time; if one were to
  graph instruction visits versus code addresses, one would typically
  see a few huge spikes amidst a lot of low-level noise.  Such spikes
  are called `hot spots' and are good candidates for heavy
  optimization or {hand-hacking}.  The term is especially used of
  tight loops and recursions in the code's central algorithm, as
  opposed to (say) initial set-up costs or large but infrequent I/O
  operations.  See {tune}, {bum}, {hand-hacking}.  2. The
  active location of a cursor on a bit-map display.  "Put the
  mouse's hot spot on the `ON' widget and click the left button."
  3. In a massively parallel computer with shared memory, the one
  location that all 10,000 processors are trying to read or
  write at once (perhaps because they are all doing a {busy-wait}
  on the same lock).

house wizard: [prob. from ad-agency lingo, `house freak'] n. A
  hacker occupying a technical-specialist, R&D, or systems position
  at a commercial shop.  A really effective house wizard can have
  influence out of all proportion to his/her ostensible rank and
  still not have to wear a suit.  Used esp. of UNIX wizards.  The
  term `house guru' is equivalent.

HP-SUX: /H-P suhks/ n. Unflattering hackerism for HP-UX,
  Hewlett-Packard's UNIX port.  Features some truly unique bogosities
  in the filesystem internals and elsewhere which occasionally create
  portability problems.  HP-UX is often referred to as `hockey-pux'
  inside HP, and one respondent claims that the proper pronunciation
  is /H-P ukkkhhhh/ as though one were about to spit.  Another such
  alternate spelling and pronunciation is "H-PUX" /H-puhks/.
  Hackers at HP/Apollo (the former Apollo Computers which was swallowed
  by HP in 1989) have been heard to complain that Mr. Packard should
  have pushed to have his name first, if for no other reason than the
  greater eloquence of the resulting acronym.  Compare {buglix}.
  See also {Telerat}, {sun-stools}, {terminak}.

huff: v. To compress data using a Huffman code.  Various programs
  that use such methods have been called `HUFF' or some variant
  thereof.  Oppose {puff}.  Compare {crunch}, {compress}.

humma: // excl. A filler word used on various `chat' and
  `talk' programs when you had nothing to say but felt that it was
  important to say something.  The word apparently originated (at
  least with this definition) on the MECC Timeshare System (MTS, a
  now-defunct educational time-sharing system running in Minnesota
  during the 1970s and the early 1980s) but was later sighted on
  early UNIX systems.

Humor, Hacker:: n. A distinctive style of shared intellectual humor
  found among hackers, having the following distinctive
  characteristics:

  1. Fascination with form-vs.-content jokes, paradoxes, and humor
  having to do with confusion of metalevels (see {meta}).  One way
  to make a hacker laugh: hold a red index card in front of him/her
  with "GREEN" written on it, or vice-versa (note, however, that
  this is funny only the first time).

  2. Elaborate deadpan parodies of large intellectual constructs, such
  as specifications (see {write-only memory}), standards documents,
  language descriptions (see {INTERCAL}), and even entire scientific
  theories (see {quantum bogodynamics}, {computron}).

  3. Jokes that involve screwily precise reasoning from bizarre,
  ludicrous, or just grossly counter-intuitive premises.

  4. Fascination with puns and wordplay.

  5. A fondness for apparently mindless humor with subversive
  currents of intelligence in it --- for example, old Warner Brothers
  and Rocky & Bullwinkle cartoons, the Marx brothers, the early
  B-52s, and Monty Python's Flying Circus.  Humor that combines this
  trait with elements of high camp and slapstick is especially
  favored.

  6. References to the symbol-object antinomies and associated ideas
  in Zen Buddhism and (less often) Taoism.  See {has the X nature},
  {Discordianism}, {zen}, {ha ha only serious}, {AI koans}.

  See also {filk}, {retrocomputing}, and appendix B.  If you have an
  itchy feeling that all 6 of these traits are really aspects of
  one thing that is incredibly difficult to talk about exactly, you
  are (a) correct and (b) responding like a hacker.  These traits are
  also recognizable (though in a less marked form) throughout
  {{science-fiction fandom}}.

hung: [from `hung up'] adj. Equivalent to {wedged}, but more
  common at UNIX/C sites.  Not generally used of people.  Syn. with
  {locked up}, {wedged}; compare {hosed}.  See also {hang}.
  A hung state is distinguished from {crash}ed or {down}, where the
  program or system is also unusable but because it is not running
  rather than because it is waiting for something.  However, the
  recovery from both situations is often the same.

hungry puppy: n. Syn. {slopsucker}.

hungus: /huhng'g*s/ [perhaps related to slang `humongous'] adj.
  Large, unwieldy, usually unmanageable.  "TCP is a hungus piece of
  code."  "This is a hungus set of modifications."

hyperspace: /hi:'per-spays/ n. A memory location that is *far*
  away from where the program counter should be pointing, often
  inaccessible because it is not even mapped in.  "Another core
  dump --- looks like the program jumped off to hyperspace
  somehow."  (Compare {jump off into never-never land}.)  This
  usage is from the SF notion of a spaceship jumping `into
  hyperspace', that is, taking a shortcut through higher-dimensional
  space --- in other words, bypassing this universe.  The variant
  `east hyperspace' is recorded among CMU and Bliss hackers.

= I =
=====

I didn't change anything!: interj. An aggrieved cry often heard as
  bugs manifest during a regression test.  The {canonical} reply to
  this assertion is "Then it works just the same as it did before,
  doesn't it?"  See also {one-line fix}.  This is also heard from
  applications programmers trying to blame an obvious applications
  problem on an unrelated systems software change, for example a
  divide-by-0 fault after terminals were added to a network.
  Usually, their statement is found to be false.  Upon close
  questioning, they will admit some major restructuring of the
  program that shouldn't have broken anything, in their opinion,
  but which actually {hosed} the code completely.

I see no X here.: Hackers (and the interactive computer games they
  write) traditionally favor this slightly marked usage over other
  possible equivalents such as "There's no X here!" or "X is
  missing."  or "Where's the X?".  This goes back to the original
  PDP-10 {ADVENT}, which would respond in this wise if you asked
  it to do something involving an object not present at your location
  in the game.

i14y: // n. Abbrev. for `interoperability', with the `14'
  replacing fourteen letters.  Used in the {X} (windows)
  community.  Refers to portability and compatibility of data formats
  (even binary ones) between different programs or implementations of
  the same program on different machines.

i18n: // n. Abbrev. for `internationali{z,s}ation', with the 18
  replacing 18 letters.  Used in the {X} (windows) community.

IBM: /I-B-M/ Inferior But Marketable; It's Better Manually;
  Insidious Black Magic; It's Been Malfunctioning; Incontinent Bowel
  Movement; and a near-{infinite} number of even less complimentary
  expansions, including `International Business Machines'.  See
  {TLA}.  These abbreviations illustrate the considerable
  antipathy most hackers have long felt toward the `industry leader'
  (see {fear and loathing}).

  What galls hackers about most IBM machines above the PC level isn't
  so much that they are underpowered and overpriced (though that does
  count against them), but that the designs are incredibly archaic,
  {crufty}, and {elephantine} ... and you can't *fix* them
  --- source code is locked up tight, and programming tools are
  expensive, hard to find, and bletcherous to use once you've found
  them.  With the release of the UNIX-based RIOS family this may have
  begun to change --- but then, we thought that when the PC-RT came
  out, too.

  In the spirit of universal peace and brotherhood, this lexicon now
  includes a number of entries attributed to `IBM'; these derive from some
  rampantly unofficial jargon lists circulated within IBM's own
  beleaguered hacker underground.

IBM discount: n. A price increase.  Outside IBM, this derives from
  the common perception that IBM products are generally overpriced
  (see {clone}); inside, it is said to spring from a belief that
  large numbers of IBM employees living in an area cause prices to
  rise.

ice: [coined by USENETter Tom Maddox, popularized by William
  Gibson's cyberpunk SF novels: acronym for `Intrusion
  Countermeasure Electronics'] Security software (in Gibson's novels,
  software that responds to intrusion by attempting to literally kill
  the intruder).  Also, `icebreaker': a program designed for
  cracking security on a system.  Neither term is in serious use yet
  as of mid-1991, but many hackers find the metaphor attractive, and
  each may develop a denotation in the future.

ifdef out: /if'def owt/ v. Syn. for {condition out}, specific
  to {C}.

ill-behaved: adj. 1. [numerical analysis] Said of an algorithm or
  computational method that tends to blow up because of accumulated
  roundoff error or poor convergence properties.  2. Software that
  bypasses the defined {OS} interfaces to do things (like screen,
  keyboard, and disk I/O) itself, often in a way that depends on the
  hardware of the machine it is running on or which is nonportable or
  incompatible with other pieces of software.  In the IBM PC/MS-DOS
  world, there is a folk theorem (nearly true) to the effect that
  (owing to gross inadequacies and performance penalties in the OS
  interface) all interesting applications are ill-behaved.  See also
  {bare metal}. Oppose {well-behaved}, compare {PC-ism}.  See
  {mess-dos}.

IMHO: // [from SF fandom via USENET; acronym for `In My Humble
  Opinion']  "IMHO, mixed-case C names should be avoided, as
  mistyping something in the wrong case can cause hard-to-detect
  errors --- and they look too Pascalish anyhow."  Also seen in
  variant forms such as IMNSHO (In My Not-So-Humble Opinion) and IMAO
  (In My Arrogant Opinion).

in the extreme: adj. A preferred superlative suffix for many hackish
  terms.  See, for example, `obscure in the extreme' under {obscure},
  and compare {highly}.

incantation: n. Any particularly arbitrary or obscure command that
  one must mutter at a system to attain a desired result.  Not used
  of passwords or other explicit security features.  Especially used
  of tricks that are so poorly documented they must be learned from a
  {wizard}.  "This compiler normally locates initialized data
  in the data segment, but if you {mutter} the right incantation they
  will be forced into text space."

include: vt. [USENET] 1. To duplicate a portion (or whole) of
  another's message (typically with attribution to the source) in a
  reply or followup, for clarifying the context of one's response.
  See the the discussion of inclusion styles under "Hacker
  Writing Style".  2. [from {C}] `#include <disclaimer.h>'
  has appeared in {sig block}s to refer to a notional `standard
  disclaimer file'.

include war: n. Excessive multi-leveled including within a
  discussion {thread}, a practice that tends to annoy readers.  In
  a forum with high-traffic newsgroups, such as USENET, this can lead
  to {flame}s and the urge to start a {kill file}.

indent style: [C programmers] n. The rules one uses to indent code
  in a readable fashion; a subject of {holy wars}.  There are four
  major C indent styles, described below; all have the aim of
  making it easier for the reader to visually track the scope of
  control constructs.  The significant variable is the placement of
  `{' and `}' with respect to the statement(s) they
  enclose and the guard or controlling statement (`if',
  `else', `for', `while', or `do') on the block,
  if any.

  `K&R style' --- Named after Kernighan & Ritchie, because the
  examples in {K&R} are formatted this way.  Also called `kernel
  style' because the UNIX kernel is written in it, and the `One True
  Brace Style' (abbrev. 1TBS) by its partisans.  The basic indent
  shown here is eight spaces (or one tab) per level; four or are
  occasionally seen, but are much less common.

    if (cond) {
            <body>
    }

  `Allman style' --- Named for Eric Allman, a Berkeley hacker who
  wrote a lot of the BSD utilities in it (it is sometimes called
  `BSD style').  Resembles normal indent style in Pascal and Algol.
  Basic indent per level shown here is eight spaces, but four is just
  as common (esp. in C++ code).

    if (cond)
    {
            <body>
    }

  `Whitesmiths style' --- popularized by the examples that came
  with Whitesmiths C, an early commercial C compiler.  Basic indent
  per level shown here is eight spaces, but four is occasionally seen.

    if (cond)
            {
            <body>
            }

  `GNU style' --- Used throughout GNU EMACS and the Free Software
  Foundation code, and just about nowhere else.  Indents are always
  four spaces per level, with `{' and `}' halfway between the
  outer and inner indent levels.

    if (cond)
      {
        <body>
      }

  Surveys have shown the Allman and Whitesmiths styles to be the most
  common, with about equal mind shares.  K&R/1TBS used to be nearly
  universal, but is now much less common (the opening brace tends to
  get lost against the right paren of the guard part in an `if'
  or `while', which is a {Bad Thing}).  Defenders of 1TBS
  argue that any putative gain in readability is less important than
  their style's relative economy with vertical space, which enables
  one to see more code on one's screen at once.  Doubtless these
  issues will continue to be the subject of {holy wars}.

index: n. See {coefficient}.

infant mortality: n. It is common lore among hackers that the
  chances of sudden hardware failure drop off exponentially with a
  machine's time since power-up (that is, until the relatively
  distant time at which enough mechanical wear in I/O devices and
  thermal-cycling stress in components has accumulated for the
  machine to start going senile).  Up to half of all chip and wire
  failures happen within a new system's first few weeks; such
  failures are often referred to as `infant mortality' problems
  (or, occasionally, as `sudden infant death syndrome').  See
  {bathtub curve}, {burn-in period}.

infinite: adj. Consisting of a large number of objects; extreme.
  Used very loosely as in: "This program produces infinite
  garbage."  "He is an infinite loser."  The word most likely to
  follow `infinite', though, is {hair} (it has been pointed out
  that fractals are an excellent example of infinite hair).  These
  uses are abuses of the word's mathematical meaning.  The term
  `semi-infinite', denoting an immoderately large amount of some
  resource, is also heard.  "This compiler is taking a semi-infinite
  amount of time to optimize my program."  See also {semi}.

infinite loop: n. One that never terminates (that is, the machine
  {spin}s or {buzz}es forever; the usual symptom is
  {catatonia}).  There is a standard joke that has been made about
  each generation's exemplar of the ultra-fast machine: "The Cray-3
  is so fast it can execute an infinite loop in under 2 seconds!"

infinity: n. 1. The largest value that can be represented in a
  particular type of variable (register, memory location, data type,
  whatever).  2. `minus infinity': The smallest such value, not
  necessarily or even usually the simple negation of plus infinity.
  In N-bit twos-complement arithmetic, infinity is
  2^{N-1} - 1 but minus infinity is - (2^{N-1}),
  not -(2^{N-1} - 1).  Note also that this is different from
  "time T equals minus infinity", which is closer to a
  mathematician's usage of infinity.

insanely great: adj. [Mac community, from Steve Jobs; also BSD UNIX
  people via Bill Joy] Something so incredibly {elegant} that it is
  imaginable only to someone possessing the most puissant of
  {hacker}-natures.

INTERCAL: /in't*r-kal/ [said by the authors to stand for
  `Compiler Language With No Pronounceable Acronym'] n. A
  computer language designed by Don Woods and James Lyon in 1972.
  INTERCAL is purposely different from all other computer
  languages in all ways but one; it is purely a written language,
  being totally unspeakable.  An excerpt from the INTERCAL Reference
  Manual will make the style of the language clear:

       It is a well-known and oft-demonstrated fact that a person whose
       work is incomprehensible is held in high esteem.  For example, if
       one were to state that the simplest way to store a value of 65536
       in a 32-bit INTERCAL variable is:

         DO :1 <- #0$#256

       any sensible programmer would say that that was absurd.  Since this
       is indeed the simplest method, the programmer would be made to look
       foolish in front of his boss, who would of course have happened to
       turn up, as bosses are wont to do.  The effect would be no less
       devastating for the programmer having been correct.

  INTERCAL has many other peculiar features designed to make it even
  more unspeakable.  The Woods-Lyons implementation was actually used
  by many (well, at least several) people at Princeton.  The language
  has been recently reimplemented as C-INTERCAL and is consequently
  enjoying an unprecedented level of unpopularity; there is even an
  alt.lang.intercal newsgroup devoted to the study and ...
  appreciation of the language on USENET.

interesting: adj. In hacker parlance, this word has strong
  connotations of `annoying', or `difficult', or both.  Hackers
  relish a challenge, and enjoy wringing all the irony possible out
  of the ancient Chinese curse "May you live in interesting times".
  Oppose {trivial}, {uninteresting}.

Internet address:: n. 1. [techspeak] An absolute network address of
  the form [email protected], where foo is a user name, bar is a
  {sitename}, and baz is a `domain' name, possibly including
  periods itself.  Contrast with {bang path}; see also {network,
  the} and {network address}.  All Internet machines and most UUCP
  sites can now resolve these addresses, thanks to a large amount of
  behind-the-scenes magic and PD software written since 1980 or so.
  See also {bang path}, {domainist}.  2. More loosely, any
  network address reachable through Internet; this includes {bang
  path} addresses and some internal corporate and government
  networks.

  Reading Internet addresses is something of an art.  Here are the
  four most important top-level functional Internet domains followed
  by a selection of geographical domains:

    com
         commercial organizations
    edu
         educational institutions
    gov
         U.S. government civilian sites
    mil
         U.S. military sites

  Note that most of the sites in the com and edu domains are in
  the U.S. or Canada.

    us
         sites in the U.S. outside the functional domains
    su
         sites in the Soviet Union (see {kremvax}).
    uk
         sites in the United Kingdom

  Within the us domain, there are subdomains for the fifty
  states, each generally with a name identical to the state's postal
  abbreviation.  Within the uk domain, there is an ac subdomain for
  academic sites and a co domain for commercial ones.  Other
  top-level domains may be divided up in similar ways.

interrupt: 1. [techspeak] n. On a computer, an event that
  interrupts normal processing and temporarily diverts
  flow-of-control through an "interrupt handler" routine.  See also
  {trap}.  2. interj. A request for attention from a hacker.
  Often explicitly spoken.  "Interrupt --- have you seen Joe
  recently?"  See {priority interrupt}.  3. Under MS-DOS, the
  term `interrupt' is nearly synonymous with `system call', because
  the OS and BIOS routines are both called using the INT instruction
  (see {{interrupt list, the}}) and because programmers so often have
  to bypass the OS (going directly to a BIOS interrupt) to get
  reasonable performance.

interrupt list, the:: [MS-DOS] n. The list of all known software
  interrupt calls (both documented and undocumented) for IBM PCs and
  compatibles, maintained and made available for free redistribution
  by Ralf Brown ([email protected]).  As of early 1991, it had grown to
  approximately a megabyte in length.

interrupts locked out: When someone is ignoring you.  In a
  restaurant, after several fruitless attempts to get the waitress's
  attention, a hacker might well observe "She must have interrupts
  locked out".  The synonym `interrupts disabled' is also common.
  Variations of this abound; "to have one's interrupt mask bit set"
  or "interrupts masked out" is also heard.  See also {spl}.

iron: n. Hardware, especially older and larger hardware of
  {mainframe} class with big metal cabinets housing relatively
  low-density electronics (but the term is also used of modern
  supercomputers).  Often in the phrase {big iron}.  Oppose
  {silicon}.  See also {dinosaur}.

Iron Age: n. In the history of computing, 1961--1971 --- the
  formative era of commercial {mainframe} technology, when {big
  iron} {dinosaur}s ruled the earth.  These began with the delivery
  of the first PDP-1, coincided with the dominance of ferrite
  {core}, and ended with the introduction of the first commercial
  microprocessor (the Intel 4004) in 1971.  See also {Stone Age};
  compare {elder days}.

iron box: [UNIX/Internet] n. A special environment set up to trap
  a {cracker} logging in over remote connections long enough to be
  traced.  May include a modified {shell} restricting the hacker's
  movements in unobvious ways, and `bait' files designed to keep him
  interested and logged on.  See also {back door}, {firewall
  machine}, {Venus flytrap}, and Clifford Stoll's account in
  `The Cuckoo's Egg' of how he made and used one (see
  the Bibliography).  Compare {padded cell}.

ironmonger: [IBM] n. Derogatory.  A hardware specialist.  Compare
  {sandbender}, {polygon pusher}.

ITS:: /I-T-S/ n. 1. Incompatible Time-sharing System, an
  influential but highly idiosyncratic operating system written for
  PDP-6s and PDP-10s at MIT and long used at the MIT AI Lab.  Much
  AI-hacker jargon derives from ITS folklore, and to have been `an
  ITS hacker' qualifies one instantly as an old-timer of the most
  venerable sort.  ITS pioneered many important innovations,
  including transparent file sharing between machines and
  terminal-independent I/O.  After about 1982, most actual work was
  shifted to newer machines, with the remaining ITS boxes run
  essentially as a hobby and service to the hacker community.  The
  shutdown of the lab's last ITS machine in May 1990 marked the end
  of an era and sent old-time hackers into mourning nationwide (see
  {high moby}).  The Royal Institute of Technology in Sweden is
  maintaining one `live' ITS site at its computer museum (right next
  to the only TOPS-10 system still on the Internet), so ITS is still
  alleged to hold the record for OS in longest continuous use
  (however, {{WAITS}} is a credible rival for this palm).  See
  appendix A.  2. A mythical image of operating-system perfection
  worshiped by a bizarre, fervent retro-cult of old-time hackers and
  ex-users (see {troglodyte}, sense 2).  ITS worshipers manage
  somehow to continue believing that an OS maintained by
  assembly-language hand-hacking that supported only monocase
  6-character filenames in one directory per account remains superior
  to today's state of commercial art (their venom against UNIX is
  particularly intense).  See also {holy wars},
  {Weenix}.

IWBNI: // [acronym] `It Would Be Nice If'.  Compare {WIBNI}.

IYFEG: // [USENET] Abbreviation for `Insert Your Favorite Ethnic
  Group'.  Used as a meta-name when telling racist jokes on the net to
  avoid offending anyone.  See {JEDR}.

= J =
=====

J. Random: /J rand'm/ n. [generalized from {J. Random Hacker}]
  Arbitrary; ordinary; any one; any old.  `J. Random' is often
  prefixed to a noun to make a name out of it.  It means roughly
  `some particular' or `any specific one'.  "Would you let
  J. Random Loser marry your daughter?"  The most common uses are
  `J. Random Hacker', `J. Random Loser', and `J. Random Nerd'
  ("Should J. Random Loser be allowed to {gun} down other
  people?"), but it can be used simply as an elaborate version of
  {random} in any sense.

J. Random Hacker: [MIT] /J rand'm hak'r/ n. A mythical figure
  like the Unknown Soldier; the archetypal hacker nerd.  See
  {random}, {Suzie COBOL}.  This may originally have been
  inspired or influenced by `J. Fred Muggs', a show-biz chimpanzee
  whose name was a household word back in the early days of {TMRC}.

jaggies: /jag'eez/ n. The `stairstep' effect observable when an
  edge (esp. a linear edge of very shallow or steep slope) is
  rendered on a pixel device (as opposed to a vector display).

JCL: /J-C-L/ n. 1. IBM's supremely {rude} Job Control
  Language.  JCL is the script language used to control the execution
  of programs in IBM's batch systems.  JCL has a very {fascist}
  syntax, and some versions will, for example, {barf} if two
  spaces appear where it expects one.  Most programmers confronted
  with JCL simply copy a working file (or card deck), changing the
  file names.  Someone who actually understands and generates unique
  JCL is regarded with the mixed respect one gives to someone who
  memorizes the phone book.  It is reported that hackers at IBM
  itself sometimes sing "Who's the breeder of the crud that mangles
  you and me?  I-B-M, J-C-L, M-o-u-s-e" to the tune of the
  "Mickey Mouse Club" theme to express their opinion of the
  beast.  2. A comparative for any very {rude} software that a
  hacker is expected to use.  "That's as bad as JCL."  As with
  {COBOL}, JCL is often used as an archetype of ugliness even by
  those who haven't experienced it.  See also {IBM}, {fear and
  loathing}.

JEDR: // n. Synonymous with {IYFEG}.  At one time, people in
  the USENET newsgroup rec.humor.funny tended to use `JEDR'
  instead of {IYFEG} or `<ethnic>'; this stemmed from a public
  attempt to suppress the group once made by a loser with initials
  JEDR after he was offended by an ethnic joke posted there.  (The
  practice was {retcon}ned by the expanding these initials as
  `Joke Ethnic/Denomination/Race'.)  After much sound and fury JEDR
  faded away; this term appears to be doing likewise.  JEDR's only
  permanent effect on the net.culture was to discredit
  `sensitivity' arguments for censorship so thoroughly that more
  recent attempts to raise them have met with immediate and
  near-universal rejection.

JFCL: /jif'kl/, /jaf'kl/, /j*-fi'kl/ vt., obs. (alt.
  `jfcl') To cancel or annul something.  "Why don't you jfcl that
  out?"  The fastest do-nothing instruction on older models of the
  PDP-10 happened to be JFCL, which stands for "Jump if Flag set and
  then CLear the flag"; this does something useful, but is a very
  fast no-operation if no flag is specified.  Geoff Goodfellow, one
  of the jargon-1 co-authors, has long had JFCL on the license plate
  of his BMW.  Usage: rare except among old-time PDP-10 hackers.

jiffy: n. 1. The duration of one tick of the system clock on the
  computer (see {tick}).  Often one AC cycle time (1/60 second in
  the U.S. and Canada, 1/50 most other places), but more recently
  1/100 sec has become common.  "The swapper runs every 6 jiffies" means
  that the virtual memory management routine is executed once for
  every 6 ticks of the clock, or about ten times a second.
  2. Confusingly, the term is sometimes also used for a 1-millisecond
  {wall time} interval.  3. Indeterminate time from a few seconds
  to forever.  "I'll do it in a jiffy" means certainly not now and
  possibly never.  This is a bit contrary to the more widespread use
  of the word.  Oppose {nano}. See also {Real Soon Now}.

job security: n. When some piece of code is written in a
  particularly {obscure} fashion, and no good reason (such as time
  or space optimization) can be discovered, it is often said that the
  programmer was attempting to increase his job security (i.e., by
  making himself indispensable for maintenance).  This sour joke
  seldom has to be said in full; if two hackers are looking over some
  code together and one points at a section and says "job security",
  the other one may just nod.

jock: n. 1. A programmer who is characterized by large and somewhat
  brute-force programs.  See {brute force}.  2. When modified by
  another noun, describes a specialist in some particular computing
  area.  The compounds `compiler jock' and `systems jock' seem to be
  the best-established examples of this.

joe code: /joh' kohd`/ n. 1. Code that is overly {tense} and
  unmaintainable.  "{Perl} may be a handy program, but if you look
  at the source, it's complete joe code."  2. Badly written,
  possibly buggy code.

  Correspondents wishing to remain anonymous have fingered a
  particular Joe at the Lawrence Berkeley Laboratory and observed
  that usage has drifted slightly; the original sobriquet `Joe code'
  was intended in sense 1.

JR[LN]: /J-R-L/, /J-R-N/ n. The names JRL and JRN
  were sometimes used as example names when discussing a kind of user
  ID used under {{TOPS-10}}; they were understood to be the initials
  of (fictitious) programmers named `J. Random Loser' and `J. Random
  Nerd' (see {J. Random}).  For example, if one said "To log
  in, type log one comma jay are en" (that is, "log 1,JRN"), the
  listener would have understood that he should use his own computer
  ID in place of `JRN'.

JRST: /jerst/ [based on the PDP-10 jump instruction] v.,obs. To
  suddenly change subjects, with no intention of returning to the
  previous topic.  Usage: rather rare except among PDP-10 diehards, and
  considered silly.  See also {AOS}.

juggling eggs: vi. Keeping a lot of {state} in your head while
  modifying a program.  "Don't bother me now, I'm juggling eggs",
  means that an interrupt is likely to result in the program's being
  scrambled.  In the classic first-contact SF novel `The Mote in
  God's Eye', by Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle, an alien describes a
  very difficult task by saying "We juggle priceless eggs in
  variable gravity."  That is a very hackish use of language.  See
  also {hack mode}.

jump off into never-never land: [from J. M. Barrie's `Peter
  Pan'] v. Same as {branch to Fishkill}, but more common in
  technical cultures associated with non-IBM computers that use the
  term `jump' rather than `branch'.  Compare {hyperspace}.

= K =
=====

K: /K/ [from {kilo-}] n. A kilobyte.  This is used both as a
  spoken word and a written suffix (like {meg} and {gig} for
  megabyte and gigabyte).  See {{quantifiers}}.

K&R: [Kernighan and Ritchie] n. Brian Kernighan and Dennis Ritchie's
  book `The C Programming Language', esp. the classic and influential
  first edition (Prentice-Hall 1978; ISBN 0-113-110163-3).  Syn.
  {White Book}, {Old Testament}.  See also {New Testament}.

kahuna: /k*-hoo'nuh/ [IBM: from the Hawaiian title for a shaman] n.
  Synonym for {wizard}, {guru}.

kamikaze packet: n. The `official' jargon for what is more commonly
  called a {Christmas tree packet}. RFC-1025, `TCP and IP Bake Off'
  says:

    10 points for correctly being able to process a "Kamikaze"
    packet (AKA nastygram, christmas tree packet, lamp test
    segment, et al.).  That is, correctly handle a segment with the
    maximum combination of features at once (e.g., a SYN URG PUSH
    FIN segment with options and data).

  See also {Chernobyl packet}.

kangaroo code: n. Syn. {spaghetti code}.

ken: /ken/ n. 1. [UNIX] Ken Thompson, principal inventor of
  UNIX.  In the early days he used to hand-cut distribution tapes,
  often with a note that read "Love, ken".  Old-timers still use
  his first name (sometimes uncapitalized, because it's a login name
  and mail address) in third-person reference; it is widely
  understood (on USENET, in particular) that without a last name
  `Ken' refers only to Ken Thompson.  Similarly, Dennis without last
  name means Dennis Ritchie (and he is often known as dmr).  See
  also {demigod}, {{UNIX}}.  2. A flaming user.  This was
  originated by the Software Support group at Symbolics because the
  two greatest flamers in the user community were both named Ken.

kgbvax: /K-G-B'vaks/ n. See {kremvax}.

kill file: [USENET] n. (alt. `KILL file') Per-user file(s) used
  by some {USENET} reading programs (originally Larry Wall's
  `rn(1)') to discard summarily (without presenting for reading)
  articles matching some particularly uninteresting (or unwanted)
  patterns of subject, author, or other header lines.  Thus to add
  a person (or subject) to one's kill file is to arrange for that
  person to be ignored by one's newsreader in future.  By extension,
  it may be used for a decision to ignore the person or subject in
  other media.  See also {plonk}.

killer micro: [popularized by Eugene Brooks] n. A
  microprocessor-based machine that infringes on mini, mainframe, or
  supercomputer performance turf.  Often heard in "No one will
  survive the attack of the killer micros!", the battle cry of the
  downsizers.  Used esp. of RISC architectures.

  The popularity of the phrase `attack of the killer micros' is
  doubtless reinforced by the movie title "Attack Of The Killer
  Tomatoes" (one of the {canonical} examples of
  so-bad-it's-wonderful among hackers).  This has even more flavor
  now that killer micros have gone on the offensive not just
  individually (in workstations) but in hordes (within massively
  parallel computers).

killer poke: n. A recipe for inducing hardware damage on a machine
  via insertion of invalid values (see {poke}) in a memory-mapped
  control register; used esp. of various fairly well-known tricks
  on {bitty box}es without hardware memory management (such as the
  IBM PC and Commodore PET) that can overload and trash analog
  electronics in the monitor.  See also {HCF}.

kilo-: [SI] pref. See {{quantifiers}}.

KIPS: /kips/ [acronym, by analogy with {MIPS} using {K}] n.
  Thousands (*not* 1024s) of Instructions Per Second.  Usage:
  rare.

KISS Principle: /kis' prin'si-pl/ n. "Keep It Simple, Stupid".
  A maxim often invoked when discussing design to fend off
  {creeping featurism} and control development complexity.
  Possibly related to the {marketroid} maxim on sales
  presentations, "Keep It Short and Simple".

kit: [USENET] n. A source software distribution that has been
  packaged in such a way that it can (theoretically) be unpacked and
  installed according to a series of steps using only standard UNIX
  tools, and entirely documented by some reasonable chain of
  references from the top-level {README file}.  The more general
  term {distribution} may imply that special tools or more
  stringent conditions on the host environment are required.

klone: /klohn/ n. See {clone}, sense 4.

kludge: /kluhj/ n. Common (but incorrect) variant of {kluge}, q.v.

kluge: /klooj/ [from the German `klug', clever] 1. n.  A Rube
  Goldberg (or Heath Robinson) device, whether in hardware or
  software.  (A long-ago `Datamation' article by Jackson Granholme
  said: "An ill-assorted collection of poorly matching parts,
  forming a distressing whole.")  2. n. A clever programming trick
  intended to solve a particular nasty case in an expedient, if not
  clear, manner.  Often used to repair bugs.  Often involves
  {ad-hockery} and verges on being a {crock}.  In fact, the
  TMRC Dictionary defined `kludge' as "a crock that works".  3. n.
  Something that works for the wrong reason.  4. vt. To insert a
  kluge into a program.  "I've kluged this routine to get around
  that weird bug, but there's probably a better way."  5. [WPI] n. A
  feature that is implemented in a {rude} manner.

  Nowadays this term is often encountered in the variant spelling
  `kludge'.  Reports from {old fart}s are consistent that `kluge'
  was the original spelling, and that `kludge' arose by mutation
  sometime in the early 1970s.  Some people who encountered the word
  first in print or on-line jumped to the reasonable but incorrect
  conclusion that the word should be pronounced /kluhj/ (rhyming
  with `sludge').  The result of this tangled history is a mess; in
  1991, many (perhaps even most) hackers pronounce the word correctly
  as /klooj/ but spell it incorrectly as `kludge' (compare the
  pronunciation drift of {mung}).  Some observers consider this
  appropriate in view of its meaning.

kluge around: vt. To avoid a bug or difficult condition by
  inserting a {kluge}.  Compare {workaround}.

kluge up: vt. To lash together a quick hack to perform a task; this
  is milder than {cruft together} and has some of the connotations
  of {hack up} (note, however, that the construction `kluge on'
  corresponding to {hack on} is never used).  "I've kluged up this
  routine to dump the buffer contents to a safe place."

Knights of the Lambda Calculus: n. A semi-mythical organization of
  wizardly LISP and Scheme hackers.  The name refers to a
  mathematical formalism invented by Alonzo Church, with which LISP is
  intimately connected.  There is no enrollment list and the criteria
  for induction are unclear, but one well-known LISPer has been known
  to give out buttons and, in general, the *members* know who
  they are....

Knuth: [Donald E. Knuth's `The Art of Computer Programming']
  n. Mythically, the reference that answers all questions about data
  structures or algorithms.  A safe answer when you do not know:
  "I think you can find that in Knuth."  Contrast {literature,
  the}.  See also {bible}.

kremvax: /krem-vaks/ [from the then large number of {USENET}
  {VAXen} with names of the form foovax] n. Originally, a
  fictitious USENET site at the Kremlin, announced on April 1, 1984
  in a posting ostensibly originated there by Soviet leader
  Konstantin Chernenko.  The posting was actually forged by Piet
  Beertema as an April Fool's joke.  Other fictitious sites mentioned in the
  hoax were moskvax and {kgbvax}, which now seems to be the one by
  which it is remembered.  This was probably the funniest of the many
  April Fool's forgeries perpetrated on USENET (which has negligible
  security against them), because the notion that USENET might ever
  penetrate the Iron Curtain seemed so totally absurd at the time.

  In fact, it was only six years later that the first genuine site in
  Moscow, demos.su, joined USENET.  Some readers needed
  convincing that the postings from it weren't just another prank.
  Vadim Antonov ([email protected]), the major poster from there
  up to at least the end of 1990, was quite aware of all this,
  referred to it frequently in his own postings, and at one point
  twitted some credulous readers by blandly asserting that he
  *was* a hoax!

  Eventually he even arranged to have the domain's gateway site
  *named* kremvax, thus neatly turning fiction into truth
  and demonstrating that the hackish sense of humor transcends
  cultural barriers.  [Mr. Antonov also contributed the
  Russian-language material for this lexicon. --- ESR]

= L =
=====

lace card: n. obs. A {{punched card}} with all holes punched (also
  called a `whoopee card').  Card readers jammed when they got to
  one of these, as the resulting card had too little structural
  strength to avoid buckling inside the mechanism.  Card punches
  could also jam trying to produce these things owing to power-supply
  problems.  When some practical joker fed a lace card through the
  reader, you needed to clear the jam with a `card knife' ---
  which you used on the joker first.

language lawyer: n. A person, usually an experienced or senior
  software engineer, who is intimately familiar with many or most of
  the numerous restrictions and features (both useful and esoteric)
  applicable to one or more computer programming languages.  A
  language lawyer is distinguished by the ability to show you the
  five sentences scattered through a 200-plus-page manual that
  together imply the answer to your question "if only you had
  thought to look there".  Compare {wizard}, {legal},
  {legalese}.

languages of choice: n. {C} and {LISP}.  Nearly every hacker
  knows one of these, and most good ones are fluent in both.  Smalltalk
  and Prolog are also popular in small but influential communities.

  There is also a rapidly dwindling category of older hackers with
  FORTRAN, or even assembler, as their language of choice.  They
  often prefer to be known as {real programmer}s, and other hackers
  consider them a bit odd (see "The Story of Mel, a Real Programmer"
  in appendix A).  Assembler is generally no longer considered
  interesting or appropriate for anything but {HLL} implementation,
  {glue}, and a few time-critical and hardware-specific uses in systems
  programs.  FORTRAN occupies a shrinking niche in scientific
  programming.

  Most hackers tend to frown on languages like {{Pascal}} and
  {{Ada}}, which don't give them the near-total freedom considered
  necessary for hacking (see {bondage-and-discipline language}), and
  to regard everything that's even remotely connected with {COBOL}
  or other traditional {card walloper} languages as a total
  and unmitigated {loss}.

larval stage: n. Describes a period of monomaniacal concentration
  on coding apparently passed through by all fledgling hackers.
  Common symptoms include the perpetration of more than one 36-hour
  {hacking run} in a given week; neglect of all other activities
  including usual basics like food, sleep, and personal hygiene; and
  a chronic case of advanced bleary-eye.  Can last from 6 months to 2
  years, the apparent median being around 18 months.  A few so
  afflicted never resume a more `normal' life, but the ordeal
  seems to be necessary to produce really wizardly (as opposed to
  merely competent) programmers.  See also {wannabee}.  A less
  protracted and intense version of larval stage (typically lasting
  about a month) may recur when one is learning a new {OS} or
  programming language.

lase: /layz/ vt. To print a given document via a laser printer.
  "OK, let's lase that sucker and see if all those graphics-macro
  calls did the right things."

laser chicken: n. Kung Pao Chicken, a standard Chinese dish
  containing chicken, peanuts, and hot red peppers in a spicy
  pepper-oil sauce.  Many hackers call it `laser chicken' for
  two reasons: It can {zap} you just like a laser, and the
  sauce has a red color reminiscent of some laser beams.

  In a variation on this theme, it is reported that some Australian
  hackers have redesignated the common dish `lemon chicken' as
  `Chernobyl Chicken'.  The name is derived from the color of the
  sauce, which is considered bright enough to glow in the dark (as,
  mythically, do some of the inhabitants of Chernobyl).

laundromat: n. Syn. {disk farm}; see {washing machine}.

LDB: /l*'d*b/ [from the PDP-10 instruction set] vt. To extract
  from the middle.  "LDB me a slice of cake, please." This usage
  has been kept alive by Common LISP's function of the same name.
  Considered silly.  See also {DPB}.

leaf site: n. A machine that merely originates and reads USENET
  news or mail, and does not relay any third-party traffic.  Often
  uttered in a critical tone; when the ratio of leaf sites to
  backbone, rib, and other relay sites gets too high, the network
  tends to develop bottlenecks.  Compare {backbone site}, {rib
  site}.

leak: n. With qualifier, one of a class of resource-management bugs
  that occur when resources are not freed properly after operations
  on them are finished, so they effectively disappear (leak out).
  This leads to eventual exhaustion as new allocation requests come
  in.  {memory leak} and {fd leak} have their own entries; one
  might also refer, to, say, a `window handle leak' in a window
  system.

leaky heap: [Cambridge] n. An {arena} with a {memory leak}.

legal: adj. Loosely used to mean `in accordance with all the
  relevant rules', esp. in connection with some set of constraints
  defined by software.  "The older =+ alternate for += is no longer
  legal syntax in ANSI C."  "This parser processes each line of
  legal input the moment it sees the trailing linefeed."  Hackers
  often model their work as a sort of game played with the
  environment in which the objective is to maneuver through the
  thicket of `natural laws' to achieve a desired objective.  Their
  use of `legal' is flavored as much by this game-playing sense as by
  the more conventional one having to do with courts and lawyers.
  Compare {language lawyer}, {legalese}.

legalese: n. Dense, pedantic verbiage in a language description,
  product specification, or interface standard; text that seems
  designed to obfuscate and requires a {language lawyer} to
  {parse} it.  Though hackers are not afraid of high information
  density and complexity in language (indeed, they rather enjoy
  both), they share a deep and abiding loathing for legalese; they
  associate it with deception, {suit}s, and situations in which
  hackers generally get the short end of the stick.

LER: /L-E-R/ [TMRC, from `Light-Emitting Diode] n. A
  light-emitting resistor (that is, one in the process of burning
  up).  Ohm's law was broken.  See {SED}.

LERP: /lerp/ vi.,n. Quasi-acronym for Linear Interpolation, used as a
  verb or noun for the operation.  E.g., Bresenham's algorithm lerps
  incrementally between the two endpoints of the line.

let the smoke out: v. To fry hardware (see {fried}).  See
  {magic smoke} for the mythology behind this.

letterbomb: n. A piece of {email} containing {live data}
  intended to do nefarious things to the recipient's machine or
  terminal.  It is possible, for example, to send letterbombs that
  will lock up some specific kinds of terminals when they are viewed,
  so thoroughly that the user must {cycle power} to unwedge them.
  Under UNIX, a letterbomb can also try to get part of its contents
  interpreted as a shell command to the mailer.  The results of this
  could range from silly to tragic.  See also {Trojan horse};
  compare {nastygram}.

lexer: /lek'sr/ n. Common hacker shorthand for `lexical
  analyzer', the input-tokenizing stage in the parser for a language
  (the part that breaks it into word-like pieces).  "Some C lexers
  get confused by the old-style compound ops like `=-'."

lexiphage: /lek'si-fayj`/ n. A notorious word {chomper} on
  ITS.  See {bagbiter}.

life: n. 1. A cellular-automata game invented by John Horton
  Conway and first introduced publicly by Martin Gardner (`Scientific
  American', October 1970).  Many hackers pass through a stage of
  fascination with it, and hackers at various places contributed
  heavily to the mathematical analysis of this game (most notably
  Bill Gosper at MIT, who even implemented life in {TECO}!; see
  {Gosperism}).  When a hacker mentions `life', he is much more
  likely to mean this game than the magazine, the breakfast cereal,
  or the human state of existence.  2. The opposite of {USENET}.
  As in {Get a life!}

light pipe: n. Fiber optic cable.  Oppose {copper}.

like kicking dead whales down the beach: adj. Describes a slow,
  difficult, and disgusting process.  First popularized by a famous
  quote about the difficulty of getting work done under one of IBM's
  mainframe OSes.  "Well, you *could* write a C compiler in
  COBOL, but it would be like kicking dead whales down the beach."
  See also {fear and loathing}

like nailing jelly to a tree: adj. Used to describe a task thought
  to be impossible, esp. one in which the difficulty arises from
  poor specification or inherent slipperiness in the problem domain.
  "Trying to display the `prettiest' arrangement of nodes and arcs
  that diagrams a given graph is like nailing jelly to a tree,
  because nobody's sure what `prettiest' means algorithmically."

line eater, the: [USENET] n. 1. A bug in some now-obsolete
  versions of the netnews software that used to eat up to BUFSIZ
  bytes of the article text.  The bug was triggered by having the
  text of the article start with a space or tab.  This bug was
  quickly personified as a mythical creature called the `line
  eater', and postings often included a dummy line of `line eater
  food'.  Ironically, line eater `food' not beginning with a space or
  tab wasn't actually eaten, since the bug was avoided; but if there
  *was* a space or tab before it, then the line eater would eat
  the food *and* the beginning of the text it was supposed to be
  protecting.  The practice of `sacrificing to the line eater'
  continued for some time after the bug had been {nailed to the
  wall}, and is still humorously referred to.  The bug itself is
  still (in mid-1991) occasionally reported to be lurking in some
  mail-to-netnews gateways.  2. See {NSA line eater}.

line starve: [MIT] 1. vi. To feed paper through a printer the wrong
  way by one line (most printers can't do this).  On a display
  terminal, to move the cursor up to the previous line of the screen.
  "To print `X squared', you just output `X', line starve,
  `2', line feed."  (The line starve causes the `2' to appear on the
  line above the `X', and the line feed gets back to the original
  line.)  2. n. A character (or character sequence) that causes a
  terminal to perform this action.  Unlike `line feed', `line starve'
  is *not* standard {{ASCII}} terminology.  Even among hackers
  it is considered a bit silly.  3. [proposed] A sequence such as \c
  (used in System V echo, as well as nroff/troff) that suppresses a
  {newline} or other character(s) that would normally be emitted.

link farm: [UNIX] n. A directory tree that contains many links to
  files in a master directory tree of files.  Link farms save space
  when (for example) one is maintaining several nearly identical
  copies of the same source tree, e.g., when the only difference is
  architecture-dependent object files.  "Let's freeze the source and
  then rebuild the FROBOZZ-3 and FROBOZZ-4 link farms."  Link farms
  may also be used to get around restrictions on the number of
  `-I' (include-file directory) arguments on older
  C preprocessors.

link-dead: [MUD] adj. Said of a {MUD} character who has frozen in
  place because of a dropped Internet connection.

lint: [from UNIX's `lint(1)', named perhaps for the bits of
  fluff it picks from programs] 1. vt. To examine a program closely
  for style, language usage, and portability problems, esp. if
  in C, esp. if via use of automated analysis tools, most esp. if
  the UNIX utility `lint(1)' is used.  This term used to be
  restricted to use of `lint(1)' itself, but (judging by
  references on USENET) it has become a shorthand for {desk check}
  at some non-UNIX shops, even in languages other than C.  Also as
  v.  {delint}.  2. n. Excess verbiage in a document, as in "this
  draft has too much lint".

lion food: [IBM] n. Middle management or HQ staff (by extension,
  administrative drones in general).  From an old joke about two
  lions who, escaping from the zoo, split up to increase their
  chances but agreed to meet after 2 months.  When they finally
  meet, one is skinny and the other overweight.  The thin one says:
  "How did you manage?  I ate a human just once and they turned out
  a small army to chase me --- guns, nets, it was terrible.  Since
  then I've been reduced to eating mice, insects, even grass."  The
  fat one replies: "Well, *I* hid near an IBM office and ate a
  manager a day.  And nobody even noticed!"

Lions Book: n. `Source Code and Commentary on UNIX level 6',
  by John Lions.  The two parts of this book contained (1) the entire
  source listing of the UNIX Version 6 kernel, and (2) a commentary
  on the source discussing the algorithms.  These were circulated
  internally at the University of New South Wales beginning 1976--77,
  and were for years after the *only* detailed kernel
  documentation available to anyone outside Bell Labs.  Because
  Western Electric wished to maintain trade secret status on the
  kernel, the Lions book was never formally published and was only
  supposed to be distributed to affiliates of source licensees.  In
  spite of this, it soon spread by samizdat to a good many of the
  early UNIX hackers.

LISP: [from `LISt Processing language', but mythically from
  `Lots of Irritating Superfluous Parentheses'] n. The name of AI's
  mother tongue, a language based on the ideas of (a) variable-length
  lists and trees as fundamental data types, and (b) the
  interpretation of code as data and vice-versa.  Invented by John
  McCarthy at MIT in the late 1950s, it is actually older than any
  other {HLL} still in use except FORTRAN.  Accordingly, it has
  undergone considerable adaptive radiation over the years; modern
  variants are quite different in detail from the original LISP 1.5.
  The dominant HLL among hackers until the early 1980s, LISP now
  shares the throne with {C}.  See {languages of choice}.

  All LISP functions and programs are expressions that return
  values; this, together with the high memory utilization of LISPs,
  gave rise to Alan Perlis's famous quip (itself a take on an Oscar
  Wilde quote) that "LISP programmers know the value of everything
  and the cost of nothing".

  One significant application for LISP has been as a proof by example
  that most newer languages, such as {COBOL} and {Ada}, are full
  of unnecessary {crock}s.  When the {Right Thing} has already
  been done once, there is no justification for {bogosity} in newer
  languages.

literature, the: n. Computer-science journals and other
  publications, vaguely gestured at to answer a question that the
  speaker believes is {trivial}.  Thus, one might answer an
  annoying question by saying "It's in the literature."  Oppose
  {Knuth}, which has no connotation of triviality.

little-endian: adj. Describes a computer architecture in which,
  within a given 16- or 32-bit word, bytes at lower addresses have
  lower significance (the word is stored `little-end-first').  The
  PDP-11 and VAX families of computers and Intel microprocessors and
  a lot of communications and networking hardware are little-endian.
  See {big-endian}, {middle-endian}, {NUXI problem}.  The term
  is sometimes used to describe the ordering of units other than
  bytes; most often these are bits within a byte.

live data: n. 1. Data that is written to be interpreted and takes
  over program flow when triggered by some un-obvious operation, such
  as viewing it.  One use of such hacks is to break security.  For
  example, some smart terminals have commands that allow one to
  download strings to program keys; this can be used to write live
  data that, when listed to the terminal, infects it with a
  security-breaking {virus} that is triggered the next time a
  hapless user strikes that key.  For another, there are some
  well-known bugs in {vi} that allow certain texts to send
  arbitrary commands back to the machine when they are simply viewed.
  2. In C code, data that includes pointers to function {hook}s
  (executable code).  3. An object, such as a {trampoline}, that is
  constructed on the fly by a program and intended to be executed as
  code. 4. Actual real-world data, as opposed to `test data'.
  For example, "I think I have the record deletion module
  finished."  "Have you tried it out on live data?"  It usually
  carries the connotation that live data is more fragile and must not
  be corrupted, else bad things will happen.  So a possible alternate
  response to the above claim might be: "Well, make sure it works
  perfectly before we throw live data at it."  The implication here
  is that record deletion is something pretty significant, and a
  haywire record-deletion module running amok on live data would
  cause great harm and probably require restoring from backups.

Live Free Or Die!: imp. 1. The state motto of New Hampshire, which
  appears on that state's automobile license plates.  2. A slogan
  associated with UNIX in the romantic days when UNIX aficionados saw
  themselves as a tiny, beleaguered underground tilting against the
  windmills of industry.  The "free" referred specifically to
  freedom from the {fascist} design philosophies and crufty
  misfeatures common on commercial operating systems.  Armando
  Stettner, one of the early UNIX developers, used to give out fake
  license plates bearing this motto under a large UNIX, all in New
  Hampshire colors of green and white.  These are now valued
  collector's items.

livelock: /li:v'lok/ n. A situation in which some critical stage
  of a task is unable to finish because its clients perpetually
  create more work for it to do after they have been serviced but
  before it can clear its queue.  Differs from {deadlock} in that
  the process is not blocked or waiting for anything, but has a
  virtually infinite amount of work to do and can never catch up.

liveware: /li:v'weir/ n. 1. Synonym for {wetware}.  Less
  common.  2. [Cambridge] Vermin. "Waiter, there's some liveware in my
  salad..."

lobotomy: n. 1. What a hacker subjected to formal management
  training is said to have undergone.  At IBM and elsewhere this term
  is used by both hackers and low-level management; the latter
  doubtless intend it as a joke.  2. The act of removing the
  processor from a microcomputer in order to replace or upgrade it.
  Some very cheap {clone} systems are sold in `lobotomized' form
  --- everything but the brain.

locked and loaded: [from military slang for an M-16 rifle with
  magazine inserted and prepared for firing] adj. Said of a removable
  disk volume properly prepared for use --- that is, locked into the
  drive and with the heads loaded.  Ironically, because their heads
  are `loaded' whenever the power is up, this description is never
  used of {{Winchester}} drives (which are named after a rifle).

locked up: adj. Syn. for {hung}, {wedged}.

logic bomb: n. Code surreptitiously inserted in an application or
  OS that causes it to perform some destructive or
  security-compromising activity whenever specified conditions are
  met.  Compare {back door}.

logical: [from the technical term `logical device', wherein a
  physical device is referred to by an arbitrary `logical' name]
  adj.  Having the role of.  If a person (say, Les Earnest at SAIL)
  who had long held a certain post left and were replaced, the
  replacement would for a while be known as the `logical' Les
  Earnest.  (This does not imply any judgment on the replacement.)
  Compare {virtual}.

  At Stanford, `logical' compass directions denote a coordinate
  system in which `logical north' is toward San Francisco,
  `logical west' is toward the ocean, etc., even though logical
  north varies between physical (true) north near San Francisco and
  physical west near San Jose.  (The best rule of thumb here is that,
  by definition, El Camino Real always runs logical north-and-south.)
  In giving directions, one might say: "To get to Rincon Tarasco
  restaurant, get onto {El Camino Bignum} going logical north."
  Using the word `logical' helps to prevent the recipient from
  worrying about that the fact that the sun is setting almost
  directly in front of him.  The concept is reinforced by North
  American highways which are almost, but not quite, consistently
  labeled with logical rather than physical directions.  A similar
  situation exists at MIT.  Route 128 (famous for the electronics
  industry that has grown up along it) is a 3-quarters circle
  surrounding Boston at a radius of 10 miles, terminating near the
  coastline at each end.  It would be most precise to describe the
  two directions along this highway as `clockwise' and
  `counterclockwise', but the road signs all say "north" and
  "south", respectively.  A hacker might describe these directions
  as `logical north' and `logical south', to indicate that they
  are conventional directions not corresponding to the usual
  denotation for those words.  (If you went logical south along the
  entire length of route 128, you would start out going northwest,
  curve around to the south, and finish headed due east!)

loop through: vt. To process each element of a list of things.
  "Hold on, I've got to loop through my paper mail."  Derives from
  the computer-language notion of an iterative loop; compare `cdr
  down' (under {cdr}), which is less common among C and UNIX
  programmers.  ITS hackers used to say `IRP over' after an
  obscure pseudo-op in the MIDAS PDP-10 assembler.

lord high fixer: [primarily British, from Gilbert & Sullivan's
  `lord high executioner'] n. The person in an organization who knows
  the most about some aspect of a system.  See {wizard}.

lose: [MIT] vi. 1. To fail.  A program loses when it encounters
  an exceptional condition or fails to work in the expected manner.
  2. To be exceptionally unesthetic or crocky.  3. Of people, to
  be obnoxious or unusually stupid (as opposed to ignorant).  See
  also {deserves to lose}.  4. n. Refers to something that is
  {losing}, especially in the phrases "That's a lose!" and "What
  a lose!"

lose lose: interj. A reply to or comment on an undesirable
  situation.  "I accidentally deleted all my files!"  "Lose,
  lose."

loser: n. An unexpectedly bad situation, program, programmer, or
  person.  Someone who habitually loses.  (Even winners can lose
  occasionally.)  Someone who knows not and knows not that he knows
  not.  Emphatic forms are `real loser', `total loser', and
  `complete loser' (but not *`moby loser', which would be a
  contradiction in terms).  See {luser}.

losing: adj. Said of anything that is or causes a {lose} or
  {lossage}.

loss: n. Something (not a person) that loses; a situation in which
  something is losing.  Emphatic forms include `moby loss', and
  `total loss', `complete loss'.  Common interjections are
  "What a loss!"  and "What a moby loss!"  Note that `moby loss'
  is OK even though `moby loser' is not used; applied to an abstract
  noun, moby is simply a magnifier, whereas when applied to a person
  it implies substance and has positive connotations.  Compare
  {lossage}.

lossage: /los'*j/ n. The result of a bug or malfunction.  This
  is a mass or collective noun.  "What a loss!" and "What
  lossage!"  are nearly synonymous.  The former is slightly more
  particular to the speaker's present circumstances; the latter
  implies a continuing {lose} of which the speaker is currently
  a victim.  Thus (for example) a temporary hardware failure is a loss,
  but bugs in an important tool (like a compiler) are serious
  lossage.

lost in the noise: adj. Syn. {lost in the underflow}.  This term
  is from signal processing, where signals of very small amplitude
  cannot be separated from low-intensity noise in the system.  Though
  popular among hackers, it is not confined to hackerdom; physicists,
  engineers, astronomers, and statisticians all use it.

lost in the underflow: adj. Too small to be worth considering;
  more specifically, small beyond the limits of accuracy or
  measurement.  This is a reference to `floating underflow', a
  condition that can occur when a floating-point arithmetic processor
  tries to handle quantities smaller than its limit of magnitude.  It
  is also a pun on `undertow' (a kind of fast, cold current that
  sometimes runs just offshore and can be dangerous to swimmers).
  "Well, sure, photon pressure from the stadium lights alters the
  path of a thrown baseball, but that effect gets lost in the
  underflow."  See also {overflow bit}.

lots of MIPS but no I/O: adj. Used to describe a person who is
  technically brilliant but can't seem to communicate with human
  beings effectively.  Technically it describes a machine that has
  lots of processing power but is bottlenecked on input-output (in
  1991, the IBM Rios, a.k.a. RS/6000, is a notorious recent
  example).

low-bandwidth: [from communication theory] adj. Used to indicate a
  talk that, although not {content-free}, was not terribly
  informative.  "That was a low-bandwidth talk, but what can you
  expect for an audience of {suit}s!"  Compare {zero-content},
  {bandwidth}, {math-out}.

LPT: /L-P-T/ or /lip'it/ or /lip-it'/ [MIT, via DEC] n.  Line
  printer, of course.  Rare under UNIX, commoner in hackers with
  MS-DOS or CP/M background.  The printer device is called
  `LPT:' on those systems that, like ITS, were strongly
  influenced by early DEC conventions.

lunatic fringe: [IBM] n. Customers who can be relied upon to accept
  release 1 versions of software.

lurker: n. One of the `silent majority' in a electronic forum;
  one who posts occasionally or not at all but is known to read the
  group's postings regularly.  This term is not pejorative and indeed
  is casually used reflexively: "Oh, I'm just lurking."  Often used
  in `the lurkers', the hypothetical audience for the group's
  {flamage}-emitting regulars.

luser: /loo'zr/ n. A {user}; esp. one who is also a {loser}.
  ({luser} and {loser} are pronounced identically.)  This word
  was coined around 1975 at MIT.  Under ITS, when you first walked up
  to a terminal at MIT and typed Control-Z to get the computer's
  attention, it printed out some status information, including how
  many people were already using the computer; it might print
  "14 users", for example.  Someone thought it would be a great joke to
  patch the system to print "14 losers" instead.  There ensued a
  great controversy, as some of the users didn't particularly want to
  be called losers to their faces every time they used the computer.
  For a while several hackers struggled covertly, each changing the
  message behind the back of the others; any time you logged into the
  computer it was even money whether it would say "users" or
  "losers".  Finally, someone tried the compromise "lusers", and it
  stuck.  Later one of the ITS machines supported `luser' as a
  request-for-help command.  ITS died the death in mid-1990, except
  as a museum piece; the usage lives on, however, and the term
  `luser' is often seen in program comments.

= M =
=====

M: [SI] pref. (on units) suff. (on numbers) See {{quantifiers}}.

macdink: /mak'dink/ [from the Apple Macintosh, which is said to
  encourage such behavior] vt. To make many incremental and
  unnecessary cosmetic changes to a program or file.  Often the
  subject of the macdinking would be better off without them.
  "When I left at 11 P.M. last night, he was still macdinking the
  slides for his presentation."  See also {fritterware}.

machinable: adj. Machine-readable.  Having the {softcopy} nature.

machoflops: /mach'oh-flops/ [pun on `megaflops', a coinage for
  `millions of FLoating-point Operations Per Second'] n. Refers to
  artificially inflated performance figures often quoted by computer
  manufacturers.  Real applications are lucky to get half the quoted
  speed. See {Your mileage may vary}, {benchmark}.

Macintoy: /mak'in-toy/ n. The Apple Macintosh, considered as a
  {toy}.  Less pejorative than {Macintrash}.

Macintrash: /mak'in-trash`/ n. The Apple Macintosh, as described
  by a hacker who doesn't appreciate being kept away from the
  *real computer* by the interface.  The term {maggotbox} has
  been reported in regular use in the Research Triangle area of North
  Carolina.  Compare {Macintoy}. See also {beige toaster},
  {WIMP environment}, {drool-proof paper}, {user-friendly}.

macro: /mak'roh/ [techspeak] n. A name (possibly followed by a
  formal {arg} list) that is equated to a text or symbolic
  expression to which it is to be expanded (possibly with the
  substitution of actual arguments) by a macro expander.  This
  definition can be found in any technical dictionary; what those
  won't tell you is how the hackish connotations of the term have
  changed over time.

  The term `macro' originated in early assemblers, which encouraged
  the use of macros as a structuring and information-hiding device.
  During the early 1970s, macro assemblers became ubiquitous, and
  sometimes quite as powerful and expensive as {HLL}s, only to fall
  from favor as improving compiler technology marginalized assembler
  programming (see {languages of choice}).  Nowadays the term is
  most often used in connection with the C preprocessor, LISP, or one
  of several special-purpose languages built around a macro-expansion
  facility (such as TeX or UNIX's [nt]roff suite).

  Indeed, the meaning has drifted enough that the collective
  `macros' is now sometimes used for code in any special-purpose
  application control language (whether or not the language is
  actually translated by text expansion), and for macro-like entities
  such as the `keyboard macros' supported in some text editors
  (and PC TSR or Macintosh INIT/CDEV keyboard enhancers).

macro-: pref. Large.  Opposite of {micro-}.  In the mainstream
  and among other technical cultures (for example, medical people)
  this competes with the prefix {mega-}, but hackers tend to
  restrict the latter to quantification.

macrology: /mak-rol'*-jee/ n. 1. Set of usually complex or crufty
  macros, e.g., as part of a large system written in {LISP},
  {TECO}, or (less commonly) assembler.  2. The art and science
  involved in comprehending a macrology in sense 1.  Sometimes
  studying the macrology of a system is not unlike archeology,
  ecology, or {theology}, hence the sound-alike construction.  See
  also {boxology}.

macrotape: /ma'kroh-tayp/ n. An industry-standard reel of tape, as
  opposed to a {microtape}.

maggotbox: /mag'*t-boks/ n. See {Macintrash}.  This is even
  more derogatory.

magic: adj. 1. As yet unexplained, or too complicated to explain;
  compare {automagically} and (Arthur C.) Clarke's Third Law:
  "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from
  magic."  "TTY echoing is controlled by a large number of magic
  bits."  "This routine magically computes the parity of an 8-bit
  byte in three instructions."  2. Characteristic of something that
  works although no one really understands why (this is especially called
  {black magic}).  3. [Stanford] A feature not generally
  publicized that allows something otherwise impossible, or a feature
  formerly in that category but now unveiled.  Compare {black
  magic}, {wizardly}, {deep magic}, {heavy wizardry}.

  For more about hackish `magic', see appendix A.

magic cookie: [UNIX] n. 1. Something passed between routines or
  programs that enables the receiver to perform some operation; a
  capability ticket or opaque identifier.  Especially used of small
  data objects that contain data encoded in a strange or
  intrinsically machine-dependent way.  E.g., on non-UNIX OSes with a
  non-byte-stream model of files, the result of `ftell(3)' may
  be a magic cookie rather than a byte offset; it can be passed to
  `fseek(3)', but not operated on in any meaningful way.  The
  phrase `it hands you a magic cookie' means it returns a result
  whose contents are not defined but which can be passed back to the
  same or some other program later.  2. An in-band code for
  changing graphic rendition (e.g., inverse video or underlining) or
  performing other control functions.  Some older terminals would
  leave a blank on the screen corresponding to mode-change magic
  cookies; this was also called a {glitch}.  See also {cookie}.

magic number: [UNIX/C] n. 1. In source code, some non-obvious
  constant whose value is significant to the operation of a program
  and that is inserted inconspicuously in-line ({hardcoded}),
  rather than expanded in by a symbol set by a commented
  `#define'.  Magic numbers in this sense are bad style.  2. A
  number that encodes critical information used in an algorithm in
  some opaque way.  The classic examples of these are the numbers
  used in hash or CRC functions, or the coefficients in a linear
  congruential generator for pseudo-random numbers.  This sense
  actually predates and was ancestral to the more common sense 1.
  3. Special data located at the beginning of a binary data file to
  indicate its type to a utility.  Under UNIX, the system and various
  applications programs (especially the linker) distinguish between
  types of executable file by looking for a magic number.  Once upon
  a time, these magic numbers were PDP-11 branch instructions that
  skipped over header data to the start of executable code; the 0407,
  for example, was octal for `branch 16 bytes relative'.  Nowadays
  only a {wizard} knows the spells to create magic numbers.  How do
  you choose a fresh magic number of your own?  Simple --- you pick
  one at random.  See?  It's magic!

magic smoke: n. A substance trapped inside IC packages that enables
  them to function (also called `blue smoke'; this is similar to
  the archaic `phlogiston' hypothesis about combustion).  Its
  existence is demonstrated by what happens when a chip burns up ---
  the magic smoke gets let out, so it doesn't work any more.  See
  {smoke test}, {let the smoke out}.

  USENETter Jay Maynard tells the following story: "Once, while
  hacking on a dedicated Z80 system, I was testing code by blowing
  EPROMs and plugging them in the system, then seeing what happened.
  One time, I plugged one in backwards.  I only discovered that
  *after* I realized that Intel didn't put power-on lights under
  the quartz windows on the tops of their EPROMs --- the die was
  glowing white-hot.  Amazingly, the EPROM worked fine after I erased
  it, filled it full of zeros, then erased it again.  For all I know,
  it's still in service.  Of course, this is because the magic smoke
  didn't get let out."  Compare the original phrasing of {Murphy's
  Law}.

mailing list: n. (often shortened in context to `list') 1. An
  {email} address that is an alias (or {macro}, though that word
  is never used in this connection) for many other email addresses.
  Some mailing lists are simple `reflectors', redirecting mail sent
  to them to the list of recipients.  Others are filtered by humans
  or programs of varying degrees of sophistication; lists filtered by
  humans are said to be `moderated'.  2. The people who receive
  your email when you send it to such an address.

  Mailing lists are one of the primary forms of hacker interaction,
  along with {USENET}.  They predate USENET, having originated
  with the first UUCP and ARPANET connections.  They are often used
  for private information-sharing on topics that would be too
  specialized for or inappropriate to public USENET groups.  Though
  some of these maintain purely technical content (such as the
  Internet Engineering Task Force mailing list), others (like the
  `sf-lovers' list maintained for many years by Saul Jaffe) are
  recreational, and others are purely social.  Perhaps the most
  infamous of the social lists was the eccentric bandykin
  distribution; its latter-day progeny, lectroids and
  tanstaafl, still include a number of the oddest and most
  interesting people in hackerdom.

  Mailing lists are easy to create and (unlike USENET) don't tie up a
  significant amount of machine resources.  Thus, they are often
  created temporarily by working groups, the members of which can
  then collaborate on a project without ever needing to meet
  face-to-face.  Much of the material in this book was criticized and
  polished on just such a mailing list (called `jargon-friends'),
  which included all the co-authors of Steele-1983.

main loop: n. Software tools are often written to perform some
  actions repeatedly on whatever input is handed to them, terminating
  when there is no more input or they are explicitly told to go away.
  In such programs, the loop that gets and processes input is called
  the `main loop'.  See also {driver}.

mainframe: n. This term originally referred to the cabinet
  containing the central processor unit or `main frame' of a
  room-filling {Stone Age} batch machine.  After the emergence of
  smaller `minicomputer' designs in the early 1970s, the
  traditional {big iron} machines were described as `mainframe
  computers' and eventually just as mainframes.  The term carries the
  connotation of a machine designed for batch rather than interactive
  use, though possibly with an interactive timesharing operating
  system retrofitted onto it; it is especially used of machines built
  by IBM, Unisys, and the other great {dinosaur}s surviving from
  computing's {Stone Age}.

  It is common wisdom among hackers that the mainframe architectural
  tradition is essentially dead (outside of the tiny market for
  {number-crunching} supercomputers (see {cray})), having been
  swamped by the recent huge advances in IC technology and low-cost
  personal computing.  As of 1991, corporate America hasn't quite
  figured this out yet, though the wave of failures, takeovers, and
  mergers among traditional mainframe makers are certainly straws in
  the wind (see {dinosaurs mating}).

management: n. 1. Corporate power elites distinguished primarily by
  their distance from actual productive work and their chronic
  failure to manage (see also {suit}).  Spoken derisively, as in
  "*Management* decided that ...".  2. Mythically, a vast
  bureaucracy responsible for all the world's minor irritations.
  Hackers' satirical public notices are often signed `The Mgt'; this
  derives from the `Illuminatus' novels (see the Bibliography).

mandelbug: /mon'del-buhg/ [from the Mandelbrot set] n. A bug
  whose underlying causes are so complex and obscure as to make its
  behavior appear chaotic or even non-deterministic.  This term
  implies that the speaker thinks it is a {Bohr bug}, rather than a
  {heisenbug}.

manged: /monjd/ [probably from the French `manger' or Italian
  `mangiare', to eat; perhaps influenced by English n. `mange',
  `mangy'] adj. Refers to anything that is mangled or damaged,
  usually beyond repair.  "The disk was manged after the electrical
  storm."  Compare {mung}.

mangle: vt. Used similarly to {mung} or {scribble}, but more violent
  in its connotations; something that is mangled has been
  irreversibly and totally trashed.

mangler: [DEC] n. A manager.  Compare {mango}; see also
  {management}.  Note that {system mangler} is somewhat different
  in connotation.

mango: /mang'go/ [orig. in-house jargon at Symbolics] n. A manager.
  Compare {mangler}.  See also {devo} and {doco}.

marbles: [from mainstream "lost all his/her marbles"] pl.n. The
  minimum needed to build your way further up some hierarchy of tools
  or abstractions.  After a bad system crash, you need to determine
  if the machine has enough marbles to come up on its own, or enough
  marbles to allow a rebuild from backups, or if you need to rebuild
  from scratch.  "This compiler doesn't even have enough marbles to
  compile `Hello World'."

marginal: adj. 1. Extremely small.  "A marginal increase in
  {core} can decrease {GC} time drastically."  In everyday
  terms, this means that it is a lot easier to clean off your desk if
  you have a spare place to put some of the junk while you sort
  through it.  2. Of extremely small merit.  "This proposed new
  feature seems rather marginal to me."  3. Of extremely small
  probability of {win}ning.  "The power supply was rather marginal
  anyway; no wonder it fried."

Marginal Hacks: n. Margaret Jacks Hall, a building into which the
  Stanford AI Lab was moved near the beginning of the 1980s (from the
  {D. C. Power Lab}).

marginally: adv. Slightly.  "The ravs here are only marginally
  better than at Small Eating Place."  See {epsilon}.

marketroid: /mar'k*-troyd/ alt. `marketing slime',
  `marketing droid', `marketeer' n. A member of a company's
  marketing department, esp. one who promises users that the next
  version of a product will have features that are not actually
  scheduled for inclusion, are extremely difficult to implement,
  and/or are in violation of the laws of physics; and/or one who
  describes existing features (and misfeatures) in ebullient,
  buzzword-laden adspeak.  Derogatory.  Compare {droid}.

Mars: n. A legendary tragic failure, the archetypal Hacker Dream
  Gone Wrong.  Mars was the code name for a family of PDP-10
  compatible computers built by Systems Concepts (now, The SC Group);
  the multi-processor SC-30M, the small uniprocessor SC-25M, and the
  never-built superprocessor SC-40M.  These machines were marvels of
  engineering design; although not much slower than the unique
  {Foonly} F-1, they were physically smaller and consumed less
  power than the much slower DEC KS10 or Foonly F-2, F-3, or F-4
  machines.  They were slso completely compatible with the DEC KL10,
  and ran all KL10 binaries, including the operating system, with no
  modifications at about 2--3 times faster than a KL10.

  When DEC cancelled the Jupiter project in 1983, Systems Concepts
  should have made a bundle selling their machine into shops with a
  lot of software investment in PDP-10s, and in fact their spring
  1984 announcement generated a great deal of excitement in the
  PDP-10 world.  TOPS-10 was running on the Mars by the summer of
  1984, and TOPS-20 by early fall.  Unfortunately, the hackers
  running Systems Concepts were much better at designing machines
  than in mass producing or selling them; the company allowed itself
  to be sidetracked by a bout of perfectionism into continually
  improving the design, and lost credibility as delivery dates
  continued to slip.  They also overpriced the product ridiculously;
  they believed they were competing with the KL10 and VAX 8600 and
  failed to reckon with the likes of Sun Microsystems and other
  hungry startups building workstations with power comparable to the
  KL10 at a fraction of the price.  By the time SC shipped the first
  SC-30M to Stanford in late 1985, most customers had already made
  the traumatic decision to abandon the PDP-10, usually for VMS or
  UNIX boxes.  Most of the Mars computers built ended up being
  purchased by CompuServe.

  This tale and the related saga of Foonly hold a lesson for hackers:
  if you want to play in the Real World, you need to learn Real World
  moves.

martian: n. A packet sent on a TCP/IP network with a source
  address of the test loopback interface [127.0.0.1].  This means
  that it will come back at you labeled with a source address that
  is clearly not of this earth.  "The domain server is getting lots
  of packets from Mars.  Does that gateway have a martian filter?"

massage: vt. Vague term used to describe `smooth' transformations of
  a data set into a different form, esp. transformations that do
  not lose information.  Connotes less pain than {munch} or {crunch}.
  "He wrote a program that massages X bitmap files into GIF
  format."  Compare {slurp}.

math-out: [poss. from `white-out' (the blizzard variety)] n. A
  paper or presentation so encrusted with mathematical or other
  formal notation as to be incomprehensible.  This may be a device
  for concealing the fact that it is actually {content-free}.  See
  also {numbers}, {social science number}.

Matrix: [FidoNet] n. 1. What the Opus BBS software and sysops call
  {FidoNet}.  2. Fanciful term for a {cyberspace} expected to
  emerge from current networking experiments (see {network, the}).
  Some people refer to the totality of present networks this way.

Mbogo, Dr. Fred: /*m-boh'goh, dok'tr fred/ [Stanford] n. The
  archetypal man you don't want to see about a problem, esp. an
  incompetent professional; a shyster.  "Do you know a good eye
  doctor?"  "Sure, try Mbogo Eye Care and Professional Dry
  Cleaning."  The name comes from synergy between {bogus} and the
  original Dr. Mbogo, a witch doctor who was Gomez Addams' physician
  on the old "Addams Family" TV show.  See also
  {fred}.

meatware: n. Synonym for {wetware}.  Less common.

meeces: /mees'*z/ [TMRC] n. Occasional furry visitors who are not
  {urchin}s.  [That is, mice. This may no longer be in live use; it
  clearly derives from the refrain of the early-1960s cartoon character
  Mr. Jinx: "I hate meeces to *pieces*!" --- ESR]

meg: /meg/ n. See {{quantifiers}}.

mega-: /me'g*/ [SI] pref. See {{quantifiers}}.

megapenny: /meg'*-pen`ee/ n. $10,000 (1 cent * 10^6).
  Used semi-humorously as a unit in comparing computer cost and
  performance figures.

MEGO: /me'goh/ or /mee'goh/ [`My Eyes Glaze Over', often `Mine Eyes
  Glazeth (sic) Over', attributed to the futurologist Herman Kahn]
  Also `MEGO factor'.  1. n. A {handwave} intended to confuse the
  listener and hopefully induce agreement because the listener does
  not want to admit to not understanding what is going on.  MEGO is
  usually directed at senior management by engineers and contains a
  high proportion of {TLA}s.  2. excl. An appropriate response to
  MEGO tactics.  3. Among non-hackers this term often refers not to
  behavior that causes the eyes to glaze, but to the eye-glazing
  reaction itself, which may be triggered by the mere threat of
  technical detail as effectively as by an actual excess of it.

meltdown, network: n.  See {network meltdown}.

meme: /meem/ [coined on analogy with `gene' by Richard
  Dawkins] n. An idea considered as a {replicator}, esp. with
  the connotation that memes parasitize people into propagating them
  much as viruses do.  Used esp. in the phrase `meme complex'
  denoting a group of mutually supporting memes that form an
  organized belief system, such as a religion.  This lexicon is an
  (epidemiological) vector of the `hacker subculture' meme complex;
  each entry might be considered a meme.  However, `meme' is often
  misused to mean `meme complex'.  Use of the term connotes
  acceptance of the idea that in humans (and presumably other tool-
  and language-using sophonts) cultural evolution by selection of
  adaptive ideas has superseded biological evolution by selection of
  hereditary traits.  Hackers find this idea congenial for tolerably
  obvious reasons.

meme plague: n. The spread of a successful but pernicious {meme},
  esp. one that parasitizes the victims into giving their all to
  propagate it.  Astrology, BASIC, and the other guy's religion are
  often considered to be examples.  This usage is given point by the
  historical fact that `joiner' ideologies like Naziism or various
  forms of millennarian Christianity have exhibited plague-like cycles
  of exponential growth followed by collapses to small reservoir
  populations.

memetics: /me-met'iks/ [from {meme}] The study of memes.  As of
  mid-1991, this is still an extremely informal and speculative
  endeavor, though the first steps towards at least statistical rigor
  have been made by H. Keith Henson and others.  Memetics is a
  popular topic for speculation among hackers, who like to see
  themselves as the architects of the new information ecologies in
  which memes live and replicate.

memory leak: n. An error in a program's dynamic-store allocation
  logic that causes it to fail to reclaim discarded memory, leading
  to eventual collapse due to memory exhaustion.  Also (esp. at
  CMU) called {core leak}.  See {aliasing bug}, {fandango on
  core}, {smash the stack}, {precedence lossage}, {overrun
  screw}, {leaky heap}, {leak}.

menuitis: /men`yoo-i:'tis/ n. Notional disease suffered by software
  with an obsessively simple-minded menu interface and no escape.
  Hackers find this intensely irritating and much prefer the
  flexibility of command-line or language-style interfaces,
  especially those customizable via macros or a special-purpose
  language in which one can encode useful hacks.  See
  {user-obsequious}, {drool-proof paper}, {WIMP environment},
  {for the rest of us}.

mess-dos: /mes-dos/ n. Derisory term for MS-DOS.  Often followed
  by the ritual banishing "Just say No!"  See {{MS-DOS}}.  Most
  hackers (even many MS-DOS hackers) loathe MS-DOS for its
  single-tasking nature, its limits on application size, its nasty
  primitive interface, and its ties to IBMness (see {fear and
  loathing}).  Also `mess-loss', `messy-dos', `mess-dog',
  `mess-dross', `mush-dos', and various combinations thereof.  In
  Ireland and the U.K. it is even sometimes called `Domestos' after a
  brand of toilet cleanser.

meta: /me't*/ or /may't*/ or (Commonwealth) /mee't*/ [from
  analytic philosophy] adj.,pref. One level of description up.
  A meta-syntactic variable is a variable in notation used to describe
  syntax, and meta-language is language used to describe language.
  This is difficult to explain briefly, but much hacker humor turns
  on deliberate confusion between meta-levels.  See {{Humor,
  Hacker}}.

meta bit: n. The top bit of an 8-bit character, which is on in
  character values 128--255.  Also called {high bit}, {alt bit},
  or {hobbit}.  Some terminals and consoles (see {space-cadet
  keyboard}) have a META shift key.  Others (including,
  *mirabile dictu*, keyboards on IBM PC-class machines) have an
  ALT key.  See also {bucky bits}.

MFTL: /M-F-T-L/ [acronym: `My Favorite Toy Language'] 1. adj.
  Describes a talk on a programming language design that is heavy on
  the syntax (with lots of BNF), sometimes even talks about semantics
  (e.g., type systems), but rarely, if ever, has any content (see
  {content-free}).  More broadly applied to talks --- even when
  the topic is not a programming language --- in which the subject
  matter is gone into in unnecessary and meticulous detail at the
  sacrifice of any conceptual content.  "Well, it was a typical MFTL
  talk".  2. n. Describes a language about which the developers are
  passionate (often to the point of prosyletic zeal) but no one else
  cares about.  Applied to the language by those outside the
  originating group.  "He cornered me about type resolution in his
  MFTL."

  The first great goal in the mind of the designer of an MFTL is
  usually to write a compiler for it, then bootstrap the design away
  from contamination by lesser languages by writing a compiler for it
  in itself.  Thus, the standard put-down question at an MFTL talk is
  "Has it been used for anything besides its own compiler?".  On
  the other hand, a language that *cannot* be used to write
  its own compiler is beneath contempt...

mickey: n. The resolution unit of mouse movement.  It has been
  suggested that the `disney' will become a benchmark unit for
  animation graphics performance.

mickey mouse program: n. North American equivalent of a {noddy}
  (that is, trivial) program.  Doesn't necessarily have the
  belittling connotations of mainstream slang "Oh, that's just
  mickey mouse stuff!"; sometimes trivial programs can be very
  useful.

micro-: pref. 1. Very small; this is the root of its use as a
  quantifier prefix.  2. A quantifier prefix, calling for
  multiplication by 10^{-6} (see {{quantifiers}}).  Neither
  of these uses is peculiar to hackers, but hackers tend to fling
  them both around rather more freely than is countenanced in
  standard English.  It is recorded, for example, that one
  CS professor used to characterize the standard length of his
  lectures as a microcentury --- that is, about 52.6 minutes (see
  also {attoparsec}, {nanoacre}, and especially
  {microfortnight}).  3. Personal or human-scale --- that is,
  capable of being maintained or comprehended or manipulated by one
  human being.  This sense is generalized from `microcomputer',
  and is esp. used in contrast with `macro-' (the corresponding
  Greek prefix meaning `large').  4. Local as opposed to global (or
  {macro-}).  Thus a hacker might say that buying a smaller car to
  reduce pollution only solves a microproblem; the macroproblem of
  getting to work might be better solved by using mass transit,
  moving to within walking distance, or (best of all) telecommuting.


microfloppies: n. 3.5-inch floppies, as opposed to 5.25-inch
  {vanilla} or mini-floppies and the now-obsolete 8-inch variety.
  This term may be headed for obsolescence as 5.25-inchers pass out
  of use, only to be revived if anybody floats a sub-3-inch floppy
  standard.  See {stiffy}, {minifloppies}.

microfortnight: n. About 1.2 sec. The VMS operating system has a
  lot of tuning parameters that you can set with the SYSGEN utility,
  and one of these is TIMEPROMPTWAIT, the time the system will wait
  for an operator to set the correct date and time at boot if it
  realizes that the current value is bogus.  This time is specified
  in microfortnights!

  Multiple uses of the millifortnight (about 20 minutes) and
  {nanofortnight} have also been reported.

microLenat: /mi:-kroh-len'-*t/ n. See {bogosity}.

microReid: /mi:'kroh-reed/ n. See {bogosity}.

Microsloth Windows: /mi:'kroh-sloth` win'dohz/ n. Hackerism for
  `Microsoft Windows', a windowing system for the IBM-PC which is so
  limited by bug-for-bug compatibility with {mess-dos} that it is
  agonizingly slow on anything less than a fast 386.  Compare {X},
  {sun-stools}.

microtape: /mi:'kroh-tayp/ n. Occasionally used to mean a
  DECtape, as opposed to a {macrotape}.  A DECtape is a small
  reel, about 4 inches in diameter, of magnetic tape about an inch
  wide.  Unlike drivers for today's {macrotape}s, microtape
  drivers allow random access to the data, and therefore could be
  used to support file systems and even for swapping (this was
  generally done purely for {hack value}, as they were far too
  slow for practical use).  In their heyday they were used in pretty
  much the same ways one would now use a floppy disk: as a small,
  portable way to save and transport files and programs.  Apparently
  the term `microtape' was actually the official term used within
  DEC for these tapes until someone coined the word `DECtape',
  which, of course, sounded sexier to the {marketroid}s.

middle-endian: adj. Not {big-endian} or {little-endian}.
  Used of perverse byte orders such as 3-4-1-2 or 2-1-4-3,
  occasionally found in the packed-decimal formats of minicomputer
  manufacturers who shall remain nameless.  See {NUXI problem}.

milliLampson: /mil'*-lamp`sn/ n. A unit of talking speed,
  abbreviated mL.  Most people run about 200 milliLampsons.  Butler
  Lampson (a CS theorist and systems implementor highly regarded
  among hackers) goes at 1000.  A few people speak faster.  This unit
  is sometimes used to compare the (sometimes widely disparate) rates
  at which people can generate ideas and actually emit them in
  speech.  For example, noted computer architect C. Gordon Bell
  (designer of the PDP-11) is said, with some awe, to think at about
  1200 mL but only talk at about 300; he is frequently reduced to
  fragments of sentences as his mouth tries to keep up with his
  speeding brain.

minifloppies: n. 5.25-inch {vanilla} floppy disks, as opposed to
  3.5-inch or {microfloppies} and the now-obsolescent 8-inch
  variety.  At one time, this term was a trademark of Shugart
  Associates for their SA-400 minifloppy drive.  Nobody paid any
  attention.  See {stiffy}.

MIPS: /mips/ [acronym] n. 1. A measure of computing speed;
  formally, `Million Instructions Per Second' (that's 10^6
  per second, not 2^{20}!); often rendered by hackers as
  `Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed' or in other
  unflattering ways.  This joke expresses a nearly universal attitude
  about the value of most {benchmark} claims, said attitude being
  one of the great cultural divides between hackers and
  {marketroid}s.  The singular is sometimes `1 MIP' even though
  this is clearly etymologically wrong.  See also {KIPS} and
  {GIPS}.  2. Computers, especially large computers, considered
  abstractly as sources of {computron}s.  "This is just a
  workstation; the heavy MIPS are hidden in the basement."  3. The
  corporate name of a particular RISC-chip company; among other
  things, they designed the processor chips used in DEC's 3100
  workstation series.  4. Acronym for `Meaningless Information per
  Second' (a joke, prob. from sense 1).

misbug: /mis-buhg/ [MIT] n. An unintended property of a program
  that turns out to be useful; something that should have been a
  {bug} but turns out to be a {feature}.  Usage: rare.  Compare
  {green lightning}. See {miswart}.

misfeature: /mis-fee'chr/ or /mis'fee`chr/ n. A feature that
  eventually causes lossage, possibly because it is not adequate for
  a new situation which has evolved.  It is not the same as a bug,
  because fixing it involves a substantial philosophical change to
  the structure of the system involved.  A misfeature is different
  from a simple unforeseen side effect; the term implies that the
  misfeature was actually carefully planned to be that way, but
  its future consequences or circumstances just weren't predicted
  accurately.  This is different from just not having thought ahead
  about it at all.  Many misfeatures (especially in user-interface
  design) arise because the designers/implementors mistook their
  personal tastes for laws of nature.  Often a former feature becomes
  a misfeature because a tradeoff was made whose parameters
  subsequently changed (possibly only in the judgment of the
  implementors).  "Well, yeah, it is kind of a misfeature that file
  names are limited to 6 characters, but the original implementors
  wanted to save directory space and we're stuck with it for now."

Missed'em-five: n. Pejorative hackerism for AT&T System V UNIX,
  generally used by {BSD} partisans in a bigoted mood.  (The
  synonym `SysVile' is also encountered.)  See {software bloat},
  {Berzerkeley}.

miswart: /mis-wort/ [from {wart} by analogy with {misbug}] n.
  A {feature} that superficially appears to be a {wart} but has been
  determined to be the {Right Thing}.  For example, in some versions
  of the {EMACS} text editor, the `transpose characters' command
  exchanges the two characters on either side of the cursor on the
  screen, *except* when the cursor is at the end of a line, in
  which case the two characters before the cursor are exchanged.
  While this behavior is perhaps surprising, and certainly
  inconsistent, it has been found through extensive experimentation
  to be what most users want.  This feature is a miswart.

moby: /moh'bee/ [MIT: seems to have been in use among model
  railroad fans years ago.  Derived from Melville's `Moby Dick' (some
  say from `Moby Pickle').] 1. adj. Large, immense, complex,
  impressive.  "A Saturn V rocket is a truly moby frob."  "Some
  MIT undergrads pulled off a moby hack at the Harvard-Yale game."
  (See appendix A).  2. n. obs. The maximum address space of a
  machine (see below).  For a 680[234]0 or VAX or most modern 32-bit
  architectures, it is 4,294,967,296 8-bit bytes (4 gigabytes).  3. A
  title of address (never of third-person reference), usually used to
  show admiration, respect, and/or friendliness to a competent
  hacker.  "Greetings, moby Dave.  How's that address-book thing for
  the Mac going?"  4. adj. In backgammon, doubles on the dice, as in
  `moby sixes', `moby ones', etc.  Compare this with
  {bignum} (sense 2): double sixes are both bignums and moby
  sixes, but moby ones are not bignums (the use of `moby' to
  describe double ones is sarcastic).  Standard emphatic forms:
  `Moby foo', `moby win', `moby loss'.  `Foby moo': a
  spoonerism due to Richard Greenblatt.

  This term entered hackerdom with the Fabritek 256K memory added to
  the MIT AI PDP-6 machine, which was considered unimaginably huge
  when it was installed in the 1960s (at a time when a more typical
  memory size for a timesharing system was 72 kilobytes).  Thus, a
  moby is classically 256K 36-bit words, the size of a PDP-6 or
  PDP-10 moby.  Back when address registers were narrow the term was
  more generally useful, because when a computer had virtual memory
  mapping, it might actually have more physical memory attached to it
  than any one program could access directly.  One could then say
  "This computer has 6 mobies" meaning that the ratio of physical
  memory to address space is 6, without having to say specifically
  how much memory there actually is.  That in turn implied that the
  computer could timeshare six `full-sized' programs without having to
  swap programs between memory and disk.

  Nowadays the low cost of processor logic means that address spaces
  are usually larger than the most physical memory you can cram onto
  a machine, so most systems have much *less* than one theoretical
  `native' moby of core.  Also, more modern memory-management
  techniques (esp. paging) make the `moby count' less significant.
  However, there is one series of popular chips for which the term
  could stand to be revived --- the Intel 8088 and 80286 with their
  incredibly {brain-damaged} segmented-memory designs.  On these, a
  `moby' would be the 1-megabyte address span of a segment/offset
  pair (by coincidence, a PDP-10 moby was exactly 1 megabyte of 9-bit
  bytes).

mod: vt.,n. 1. Short for `modify' or `modification'.  Very
  commonly used --- in fact the full terms are considered markers
  that one is being formal.  The plural `mods' is used esp. with
  reference to bug fixes or minor design changes in hardware or
  software, most esp. with respect to {patch} sets or a {diff}.
  2. Short for {modulo} but used *only* for its techspeak sense.

mode: n. A general state, usually used with an adjective
  describing the state.  Use of the word `mode' rather than
  `state' implies that the state is extended over time, and
  probably also that some activity characteristic of that state is
  being carried out. "No time to hack; I'm in thesis mode."  In its
  jargon sense, `mode' is most often attributed to people, though it is
  sometimes applied to programs and inanimate objects. In particular,
  see {hack mode}, {day mode}, {night mode}, {demo mode},
  {fireworks mode}, and {yoyo mode}; also {talk
  mode}.

  One also often hears the verbs `enable' and `disable' used in
  connection with jargon modes.  Thus, for example, a sillier way of
  saying "I'm going to crash" is "I'm going to enable crash mode
  now".  One might also hear a request to "disable flame mode,
  please".

mode bit: n. A {flag}, usually in hardware, that selects between
  two (usually quite different) modes of operation.  The connotations
  are different from {flag} bit in that mode bits are mainly
  written during a boot or set-up phase, are seldom explicitly read,
  and seldom change over the lifetime of an ordinary program.  The
  classic example was the EBCDIC-vs.-ASCII bit (#12) of the Program
  Status Word of the IBM 360.  Another was the bit on a PDP-12 that
  controlled whether it ran the PDP-8 or the LINC instruction set.

modulo: /mo'dyu-loh/ prep. Except for.  From mathematical
  terminology; one can consider saying that 4 = 22 except for
  the 9s (4 = 22 mod 9).  "Well, LISP seems to work okay now,
  modulo that {GC} bug."  "I feel fine today modulo a slight
  headache."

molly-guard: /mol'ee-gard/ [University of Illinois] n. A shield
  to prevent tripping of some {Big Red Switch} by clumsy or
  ignorant hands.  Originally used of some plexiglass covers
  improvised for the BRS on an IBM 4341 after a programmer's toddler
  daughter (named Molly) frobbed it twice in one day.  Later
  generalized to covers over stop/reset switches on disk drives and
  networking equipment.

Mongolian Hordes technique: n. Development by {gang bang}
  (poss. from the Sixties counterculture expression `Mongolian
  clusterfuck' for a public orgy).  Implies that large numbers of
  inexperienced programmers are being put on a job better performed
  by a few skilled ones.  Also called `Chinese Army technique';
  see also {Brooks's Law}.

monkey up: vt. To hack together hardware for a particular task,
  especially a one-shot job.  Connotes an extremely {crufty} and
  consciously temporary solution.  Compare {hack up}, {kluge up},
  {cruft together}, {cruft together}.

monkey, scratch: n.  See {scratch monkey}.

monstrosity: 1. n. A ridiculously {elephantine} program or system,
  esp. one that is buggy or only marginally functional.  2. The
  quality of being monstrous (see `Overgeneralization' in the discussion
  of jargonification).  See also {baroque}.

Moof: /moof/ [MAC users] n. The Moof or `dogcow' is a
  semi-legendary creature that lurks in the depths of the Macintosh
  Technical Notes Hypercard stack V3.1; specifically, the full story
  of the dogcow is told in technical note #31 (the particular Moof
  illustrated is properly named `Clarus').  Option-shift-click will
  cause it to emit a characteristic `Moof!' or `!fooM' sound.
  *Getting* to tech note 31 is the hard part; to discover how
  to do that, one must needs examine the stack script with a hackerly
  eye.  Clue: {rot13} is involved.  A dogcow also appears if you
  choose `Page Setup...' with a LaserWriter selected and click on
  the `Options' button.

Moore's Law: /morz law/ prov. The observation that the logic
  density of silicon integrated circuits has closely followed the
  curve (bits per square inch)  = 2^{(n - 1962)}; that is, the
  amount of information storable in one square inch of silicon has
  roughly doubled yearly every year since the technology was
  invented.  See also {Parkinson's Law of Data}.

moria: /mor'ee-*/ n. Like {nethack} and {rogue}, one of the
  large PD Dungeons-and-Dragons-like simulation games, available for
  a wide range of machines and operating systems.  Extremely
  addictive and a major consumer of time better used for hacking.

MOTAS: /moh-toz/ [USENET: Member Of The Appropriate Sex, after
  {MOTOS} and {MOTSS}] n. A potential or (less often) actual sex
  partner.  See also {SO}.

MOTOS: /moh-tohs/ [acronym from the 1970 U.S. census forms via
  USENET: Member Of The Opposite Sex] n. A potential or (less often)
  actual sex partner.  See {MOTAS}, {MOTSS}, {SO}.  Less
  common than MOTSS or {MOTAS}, which have largely displaced it.

MOTSS: /mots/ or /M-O-T-S-S/ [from the 1970 U.S. census forms
  via USENET, Member Of The Same Sex] n. Esp. one considered as a
  possible sexual partner.  The gay-issues newsgroup on USENET is
  called soc.motss.  See {MOTOS} and {MOTAS}, which derive
  from it.  Also see {SO}.

mouse ahead: vi. Point-and-click analog of `type ahead'.  To
  manipulate a computer's pointing device (almost always a mouse in
  this usage, but not necessarily) and its selection or command
  buttons before a computer program is ready to accept such input, in
  anticipation of the program accepting the input.  Handling this
  properly is rare, but it can help make a {WIMP environment} much
  more usable, assuming the users are familiar with the behavior of the
  user interface.

mouse around: vi. To explore public portions of a large system, esp.
  a network such as Internet via {FTP} or {TELNET}, looking for
  interesting stuff to {snarf}.

mouse belt: n. See {rat belt}.

mouse droppings: [MS-DOS] n. Pixels (usually single) that are not
  properly restored when the mouse pointer moves away from a
  particular location on the screen, producing the appearance that
  the mouse pointer has left droppings behind.  The major causes for
  this problem are programs that write to the screen memory
  corresponding to the mouse pointer's current location without
  hiding the mouse pointer first, and mouse drivers that do not quite
  support the graphics mode in use.

mouse elbow: n. A tennis-elbow-like fatigue syndrome resulting from
  excessive use of a {WIMP environment}.  Similarly, `mouse
  shoulder'; GLS reports that he used to get this a lot before he
  taught himself to be ambimoustrous.

mouso: /mow'soh/ n. [by analogy with `typo'] An error in mouse usage
  resulting in an inappropriate selection or graphic garbage on the
  screen.  Compare {thinko}, {braino}.

MS-DOS:: /M-S-dos/ [MicroSoft Disk Operating System] n. A
  {clone} of {{CP/M}} for the 8088 crufted together in 6 weeks by
  hacker Tim Paterson, who is said to have regretted it ever since.
  Numerous features, including vaguely UNIX-like but rather broken
  support for subdirectories, I/O redirection, and pipelines, were
  hacked into 2.0 and subsequent versions; as a result, there are two
  or more incompatible versions of many system calls, and MS-DOS
  programmers can never agree on basic things like what character to
  use as an option switch or whether to be case-sensitive.  The
  resulting mess is now the highest-unit-volume OS in history.  Often
  known simply as DOS, which annoys people familiar with other
  similarly abbreviated operating systems (the name goes back to the
  mid-1960s, when it was attached to IBM's first disk operating
  system for the 360).  Some people like to pronounce DOS like
  "dose", as in "I don't work on dose, man!", or to compare it
  to a dose of brain-damaging drugs (a slogan button in wide
  circulation among hackers exhorts: "MS-DOS: Just say No!").  See
  {mess-dos}, {ill-behaved}.

mu: /moo/ The correct answer to the classic trick question
  "Have you stopped beating your wife yet?".  Assuming that you
  have no wife or you have never beaten your wife, the answer "yes"
  is wrong because it implies that you used to beat your wife and
  then stopped, but "no" is worse because it suggests that you
  have one and are still beating her.  According to various
  Discordians and Douglas Hofstadter (see the Bibliography), the
  correct answer is usually "mu", a Japanese word alleged to mean
  "Your question cannot be answered because it depends on incorrect
  assumptions".  Hackers tend to be sensitive to logical
  inadequacies in language, and many have adopted this suggestion
  with enthusiasm.  The word `mu' is actually from Chinese, meaning
  `nothing'; it is used in mainstream Japanese in that sense, but
  native speakers do not recognize the Discordian question-denying
  use.  It almost certainly derives from overgeneralization of the
  answer in the following well-known Rinzei Zen teaching riddle:

    A monk asked Joshu, "Does a dog have the Buddha nature?"
    Joshu retorted, "Mu!"

  See also {has the X nature}, {AI Koans}, and Douglas
  Hofstadter's `G"odel, Escher, Bach' (pointer in the
  Bibliography).

MUD: /muhd/ [acronym, Multi-User Dungeon; alt. Multi-User
  Dimension] 1. n.  A class of {virtual reality} experiments
  accessible via the Internet.  These are real-time chat forums with
  structure; they have multiple `locations' like an adventure game,
  and may include combat, traps, puzzles, magic, a simple economic
  system, and the capability for characters to build more structure
  onto the database that represents the existing world.  2. vi. To
  play a MUD (see {hack-and-slay}).  The acronym MUD is often
  lowercased and/or verbed; thus, one may speak of `going
  mudding', etc.

  Historically, MUDs (and their more recent progeny with names of MU-
  form) derive from an AI experiment by Richard Bartle and Roy
  Trubshaw on the University of Essex's DEC-10 in the early 1980s;
  descendants of that game still exist today (see {BartleMUD}).
  The title `MUD' is still trademarked to the commercial MUD run by
  Bartle on British Telecom (the motto: "You haven't *lived*
  'til you've *died* on MUD!"); however, this did not stop
  students on the European academic networks from copying and improving
  on the MUD concept, from which sprung several new MUDs (VAXMUD,
  AberMUD, LPMUD).  Many of these had associated bulletin-board
  systems for social interaction.  Because USENET feeds have been
  spotty and difficult to get in the U.K.  and the British JANET
  network doesn't support {FTP} or remote login via telnet, the
  MUDs became major foci of hackish social interaction there.

  AberMUD and other variants crossed the Atlantic around 1988 and
  quickly gained popularity in the U.S.; they became nuclei for large
  hacker communities with only loose ties to traditional hackerdom
  (some observers see parallels with the growth of USENET in the
  early 1980s).  The second wave of MUDs (TinyMUD and variants)
  tended to emphasize social interaction, puzzles, and cooperative
  world-building as opposed to combat and competition.  In 1991, over
  50% of MUD sites are of a third major variety, LPMUD, which
  synthesizes the combat/puzzle aspects of AberMUD and older systems
  with the extensibility of TinyMud. The trend toward greater
  programmability and flexibility will doubtless continue.

  The state of the art in MUD design is still moving very rapidly,
  with new simulation designs appearing (seemingly) every month.
  There is now (early 1991) a move afoot to deprecate the term
  {MUD} itself, as newer designs exhibit an exploding variety of
  names corresponding to the different simulation styles being
  explored.  See also {BartleMUD}, {berserking}, {bonk/oif},
  {brand brand brand}, {FOD}, {hack-and-slay}, {link-dead},
  {mudhead}, {posing}, {talk mode}, {tinycrud}.

mudhead: n. Commonly used to refer to a {MUD} player who
  sleeps, breathes, and eats MUD.  Mudheads have been known to fail
  their degrees, drop out, etc., with the consolation, however, that
  they made wizard level.  When encountered in person, all a mudhead
  will talk about is two topics: the tactic, character, or wizard
  that is supposedly always unfairly stopping him/her from becoming a
  wizard or beating a favorite MUD, and the MUD he or she is writing
  or going to write because all existing MUDs are so dreadful!  See
  also {wannabee}.

multician: /muhl-ti'shn/ [coined at Honeywell, ca. 1970] n.
  Competent user of {{Multics}}.  Perhaps oddly, no one has ever
  promoted the analogous `Unician'.

Multics:: /muhl'tiks/ n. [from "MULTiplexed Information and
  Computing Service"] An early (late 1960s) timesharing operating
  system co-designed by a consortium including MIT, GE, and Bell
  Laboratories.  Very innovative for its time --- among other things,
  it introduced the idea of treating all devices uniformly as special
  files.  All the members but GE eventually pulled out after
  determining that {second-system effect} had bloated Multics to
  the point of practical unusability (the `lean' predecessor in
  question was {CTSS}).  Honeywell commercialized Multics after
  buying out GE's computer group, but it was never very successful
  (among other things, on some versions one was commonly required to
  enter a password to log out).  One of the developers left in the
  lurch by the project's breakup was Ken Thompson, a circumstance
  which led directly to the birth of {{UNIX}}.  For this and other
  reasons, aspects of the Multics design remain a topic of occasional
  debate among hackers.  See also {brain-damaged} and {GCOS}.

multitask: n. Often used of humans in the same meaning it has for
  computers, to describe a person doing several things at once (but
  see {thrash}).  The term `multiplex', from communications
  technology (meaning to handle more than one channel at the same
  time), is used similarly.

mumblage: /muhm'bl*j/ n. The topic of one's mumbling (see {mumble}).
  "All that mumblage" is used like "all that stuff" when it is
  not quite clear how the subject of discussion works, or like "all that
  crap" when `mumble' is being used as an implicit replacement for
  pejoratives.

mumble: interj. 1. Said when the correct response is too
  complicated to enunciate, or the speaker has not thought it out.
  Often prefaces a longer answer, or indicates a general reluctance
  to get into a long discussion.  "Don't you think that we could
  improve LISP performance by using a hybrid reference-count
  transaction garbage collector, if the cache is big enough and there
  are some extra cache bits for the microcode to use?"  "Well,
  mumble ... I'll have to think about it."  2. Sometimes used as
  an expression of disagreement.  "I think we should buy a
  {VAX}."  "Mumble!"  Common variant: `mumble frotz' (see
  {frotz}; interestingly, one does not say `mumble frobnitz'
  even though `frotz' is short for `frobnitz').  3. Yet another
  metasyntactic variable, like {foo}.  4. When used as a question
  ("Mumble?") means "I didn't understand you".  5. Sometimes used
  in `public' contexts on-line as a placefiller for things one is
  barred from giving details about.  For example, a poster with
  pre-released hardware in his machine might say "Yup, my machine
  now has an extra 16M of memory, thanks to the card I'm testing for
  Mumbleco."

munch: [often confused with {mung}, q.v.] vt. To transform
  information in a serial fashion, often requiring large amounts of
  computation.  To trace down a data structure.  Related to {crunch}
  and nearly synonymous with {grovel}, but connotes less pain.

munching: n. Exploration of security holes of someone else's
  computer for thrills, notoriety, or to annoy the system manager.
  Compare {cracker}.  See also {hacked off}.

munching squares: n. A {display hack} dating back to the PDP-1
  (ca. 1962, reportedly discovered by Jackson Wright), which employs a
  trivial computation (repeatedly plotting the graph Y = X XOR T for
  successive values of T --- see {HAKMEM} items 146--148) to produce
  an impressive display of moving and growing squares that devour the
  screen.  The initial value of T is treated as a parameter, which,
  when well-chosen, can produce amazing effects.  Some of these,
  later (re)discovered on the LISP machine, have been christened
  `munching triangles' (try AND for XOR and toggling points
  instead of plotting them), `munching w's', and `munching
  mazes'.  More generally, suppose a graphics program produces an
  impressive and ever-changing display of some basic form, foo, on a
  display terminal, and does it using a relatively simple program;
  then the program (or the resulting display) is likely to be
  referred to as `munching foos' (this is a good example of the use
  of the word {foo} as a metasyntactic variable).

munchkin: /muhnch'kin/ [from the squeaky-voiced little people in
  L. Frank Baum's `The Wizard of Oz'] n. A teenage-or-younger micro
  enthusiast hacking BASIC or something else equally constricted.  A
  term of mild derision --- munchkins are annoying but some grow up
  to be hackers after passing through a {larval stage}.  The term
  {urchin} is also used.  See also {wannabee}, {bitty box}.

mundane: [from SF fandom] n. 1. A person who is not in science
  fiction fandom.  2. A person who is not in the computer industry.
  In this sense, most often an adjectival modifier as in "in my
  mundane life...." See also {Real World}.

mung: /muhng/ alt. `munge' /muhnj/ [in 1960 at MIT, `Mash
  Until No Good'; sometime after that the derivation from the
  {{recursive acronym}} `Mung Until No Good' became standard] vt.
  1. To make changes to a file, esp. large-scale and irrevocable
  changes.  See {BLT}.  2. To destroy, usually accidentally,
  occasionally maliciously.  The system only mungs things
  maliciously; this is a consequence of {Finagle's Law}.  See
  {scribble}, {mangle}, {trash}, {nuke}.  Reports from
  {USENET} suggest that the pronunciation /muhnj/ is now usual
  in speech, but the spelling `mung' is still common in program
  comments (compare the widespread confusion over the proper spelling
  of {kluge}).  3. The kind of beans of which the sprouts are used
  in Chinese food.  (That's their real name!  Mung beans!  Really!)

Murphy's Law: prov. The correct, *original* Murphy's Law
  reads: "If there are two or more ways to do something, and one of
  those ways can result in a catastrophe, then someone will do it."
  This is a principle of defensive design, cited here because it is
  usually given in mutant forms less descriptive of the challenges of
  design for lusers.  For example, you don't make a two-pin plug
  symmetrical and then label it `THIS WAY UP'; if it matters which
  way it is plugged in, then you make the design asymmetrical (see
  also the anecdote under {magic smoke}).

  Edward A. Murphy, Jr. was one of the engineers on the rocket-sled
  experiments that were done by the U.S. Air Force in 1949 to test
  human acceleration tolerances.  One experiment involved a set of
  16 accelerometers mounted to different parts of the subject's body.
  There were two ways each sensor could be glued to its mount, and
  somebody methodically installed all 16 the wrong way around.
  Murphy then made the original form of his pronouncement, which the
  test subject (Major John Paul Stapp) quoted at a news conference a
  few days later.

  Within months `Murphy's Law' had spread to various technical
  cultures connected to aerospace engineering.  Before too many years
  had gone by variants had passed into the popular imagination,
  changing as they went.  Most of these are variants on "Anything
  that can go wrong, will"; this is sometimes referred to as
  {Finagle's Law}.  The memetic drift apparent in these mutants
  clearly demonstrates Murphy's Law acting on itself!

Music:: n. A common extracurricular interest of hackers (compare
  {{science-fiction fandom}}, {{oriental food}}; see also
  {filk}).  Hackish folklore has long claimed that musical and
  programming abilities are closely related, and there has been at
  least one large-scale statistical study that supports this.
  Hackers, as a rule, like music and often develop musical
  appreciation in unusual and interesting directions.  Folk music is
  very big in hacker circles; so is electronic music, and the sort of
  elaborate instrumental jazz/rock that used to be called
  `progressive' and isn't recorded much any more.  The hacker's
  musical range tends to be wide; many can listen with equal
  appreciation to (say) Talking Heads, Yes, Gentle Giant, Spirogyra,
  Scott Joplin, Tangerine Dream, King Sunny Ade, The Pretenders, or
  Bach's Brandenburg Concerti.  It is also apparently true that
  hackerdom includes a much higher concentration of talented amateur
  musicians than one would expect from a similar-sized control group
  of {mundane} types.

mutter: vt. To quietly enter a command not meant for the ears, eyes,
  or fingers of ordinary mortals.  Often used in `mutter an
  {incantation}'.  See also {wizard}.

= N =
=====

N: /N/ quant. 1. A large and indeterminate number of objects:
  "There were N bugs in that crock!"  Also used in its
  original sense of a variable name: "This crock has N bugs,
  as N goes to infinity."  (The true number of bugs is always
  at least N + 1.)  2. A variable whose value is inherited
  from the current context.  For example, when a meal is being
  ordered at a restaurant, N may be understood to mean however
  many people there are at the table.  From the remark "We'd like to
  order N wonton soups and a family dinner
  for N - 1" you can deduce that one person at the table
  wants to eat only soup, even though you don't know how many people
  there are (see {great-wall}).  3. `Nth': adj. The
  ordinal counterpart of N, senses #1 and #2.  "Now for the
  Nth and last time..." In the specific context
  "Nth-year grad student", N is generally assumed to
  be at least 4, and is usually 5 or more (see {tenured graduate
  student}).  See also {{random numbers}}, {two-to-the-n}.

nailed to the wall: [like a trophy] adj. Said of a bug finally
  eliminated after protracted, and even heroic, effort.

nailing jelly: vi. See {like nailing jelly to a tree}.

na"ive: adj. Untutored in the perversities of some particular
  program or system; one who still tries to do things in an intuitive
  way, rather than the right way (in really good designs these
  coincide, but most designs aren't `really good' in the
  appropriate sense).  This is completely unrelated to general
  maturity or competence, or even competence at any other specific
  program.  It is a sad commentary on the primitive state of
  computing that the natural opposite of this term is often claimed
  to be `experienced user' but is really more like `cynical
  user'.

na"ive user: n. A {luser}.  Tends to imply someone who is
  ignorant mainly owing to inexperience.  When this is applied to
  someone who *has* experience, there is a definite implication
  of stupidity.

NAK: /nak/ [from the ASCII mnemonic for 0010101] interj.
  1. On-line joke answer to {ACK}?: "I'm not here."
  2. On-line answer to a request for chat: "I'm not available."
  3. Used to politely interrupt someone to tell them you don't
  understand their point or that they have suddenly stopped making
  sense.  See {ACK}, sense 3.  "And then, after we recode the
  project in COBOL...."  "Nak, Nak, Nak!  I thought I heard you
  say COBOL!"

nano: /nan'oh/ [CMU: from `nanosecond'] n. A brief period of
  time.  "Be with you in a nano" means you really will be free
  shortly, i.e., implies what mainstream people mean by "in a
  jiffy" (whereas the hackish use of `jiffy' is quite different ---
  see {jiffy}).

nano-: [SI: the next quantifier below {micro-}; meaning *
  10^{-9}] pref. Smaller than {micro-}, and used in the same rather
  loose and connotative way.  Thus, one has {{nanotechnology}}
  (coined by hacker K. Eric Drexler) by analogy with
  `microtechnology'; and a few machine architectures have a
  `nanocode' level below `microcode'.  Tom Duff at Bell Labs has
  also pointed out that "Pi seconds is a nanocentury".
  See also {{quantifiers}}, {pico-}, {nanoacre}, {nanobot},
  {nanocomputer}, {nanofortnight}.

nanoacre: /nan'oh-ay`kr/ n. A unit (about 2 mm square) of real
  estate on a VLSI chip.  The term gets its giggle value from the
  fact that VLSI nanoacres have costs in the same range as real acres
  once one figures in design and fabrication-setup costs.

nanobot: /nan'oh-bot/ n. A robot of microscopic proportions,
  presumably built by means of {{nanotechnology}}.  As yet, only
  used informally (and speculatively!).  Also called a `nanoagent'.

nanocomputer: /nan'oh-k*m-pyoo'tr/ n. A computer whose switching
  elements are molecular in size.  Designs for mechanical
  nanocomputers which use single-molecule sliding rods for their
  logic have been proposed.  The controller for a {nanobot} would be
  a nanocomputer.

nanofortnight: [Adelaide University] n. 1 fortnight * 10^-9,
  or about 1.2 msec.  This unit was used largely by students doing
  undergraduate practicals.  See {microfortnight}, {attoparsec},
  and {micro-}.

nanotechnology:: /nan'-oh-tek-no`l*-jee/ n. A hypothetical
  fabrication technology in which objects are designed and built with
  the individual specification and placement of each separate atom.
  The first unequivocal nanofabrication experiments are taking place
  now (1990), for example with the deposition of individual xenon
  atoms on a nickel substrate to spell the logo of a certain very
  large computer company.  Nanotechnology has been a hot topic in the
  hacker subculture ever since the term was coined by K. Eric Drexler
  in his book `Engines of Creation', where he predicted that
  nanotechnology could give rise to replicating assemblers,
  permitting an exponential growth of productivity and personal
  wealth.  See also {blue goo}, {gray goo}, {nanobot}.

nastygram: /nas'tee-gram/ n. 1. A protocol packet or item of email
  (the latter is also called a {letterbomb}) that takes advantage
  of misfeatures or security holes on the target system to do
  untoward things.  2. Disapproving mail, esp. from a {net.god},
  pursuant to a violation of {netiquette} or a complaint about
  failure to correct some mail- or news-transmission problem.  Compare
  {shitogram}.  3. A status report from an unhappy, and probably
  picky, customer.  "What'd Corporate say in today's nastygram?"
  4. [deprecated] An error reply by mail from a {daemon}; in
  particular, a {bounce message}.

Nathan Hale: n. An asterisk (see also {splat}, {{ASCII}}).  Oh,
  you want an etymology?  Notionally, from "I regret that I have only
  one asterisk for my country!", a misquote of the famous remark
  uttered by Nathan Hale just before he was hanged.  Hale was a
  (failed) spy for the rebels in the American War of Independence.

nature: n. See {has the X nature}.

neat hack: n. 1. A clever technique.  2. A brilliant practical
  joke, where neatness is correlated with cleverness, harmlessness,
  and surprise value.  Example: the Caltech Rose Bowl card display
  switch (see appendix A).  See {hack}.

neep-neep: /neep neep/ [onomatopoeic, from New York SF fandom] n.
  One who is fascinated by computers.  More general than {hacker},
  as it need not imply more skill than is required to boot games on a
  PC.  The derived noun `neep-neeping' applies specifically to
  the long conversations about computers that tend to develop in the
  corners at most SF-convention parties.  Fandom has a related
  proverb to the effect that "Hacking is a conversational black
  hole!".

neophilia: /nee`oh-fil'-ee-*/ n. The trait of being excited and
  pleased by novelty.  Common trait of most hackers, SF fans, and
  members of several other connected leading-edge subcultures,
  including the pro-technology `Whole Earth' wing of the ecology
  movement, space activists, many members of Mensa, and the
  Discordian/neo-pagan underground.  All these groups overlap heavily
  and (where evidence is available) seem to share characteristic
  hacker tropisms for science fiction, {{Music}}, and {{oriental
  food}}.

net.-: /net dot/ pref. [USENET] Prefix used to describe people and
  events related to USENET.  From the time before the {Great
  Renaming}, when most non-local newsgroups had names beginning
  `net.'.  Includes {net.god}s, `net.goddesses' (various
  charismatic net.women with circles of on-line admirers),
  `net.lurkers' (see {lurker}), `net.person',
  `net.parties' (a synonym for {boink}, sense 2), and
  many similar constructs.  See also {net.police}.

net.god: /net god/ n. Used to refer to anyone who satisfies some
  combination of the following conditions: has been visible on USENET
  for more than 5 years, ran one of the original backbone sites,
  moderated an important newsgroup, wrote news software, or knows
  Gene, Mark, Rick, Mel, Henry, Chuq, and Greg personally.  See
  {demigod}.   Net.goddesses such as Rissa or the Slime Sisters have
  (so far) been distinguished more by personality than by authority.

net.personality: /net per`sn-al'-*-tee/ n. Someone who has made a name
  for him or herself on {USENET}, through either longevity or
  attention-getting posts, but doesn't meet the other requirements of
  {net.god}hood.

net.police: /net-p*-lees'/ n. (var. `net.cops') Those USENET
  readers who feel it is their responsibility to pounce on and
  {flame} any posting which they regard as offensive or in
  violation of their understanding of {netiquette}.  Generally
  used sarcastically or pejoratively.  Also spelled `net police'.
  See also {net.-}, {code police}.

nethack: /net'hak/ [UNIX] n. A dungeon game similar to
  {rogue} but more elaborate, distributed in C source over
  {USENET} and very popular at UNIX sites and on PC-class machines
  (nethack is probably the most widely distributed of the freeware
  dungeon games).  The earliest versions, written by Jay Fenlason and later
  considerably enhanced by Andries Brouwer, were simply called
  `hack'.  The name changed when maintenance was taken over by a
  group of hackers originally organized by Mike Stephenson; the
  current contact address (as of mid-1991) is
  [email protected].

netiquette: /net'ee-ket/ or /net'i-ket/ [portmanteau from "network
  etiquette"] n. Conventions of politeness recognized on {USENET},
  such as avoidance of cross-posting to inappropriate groups or
  refraining from commercial pluggery on the net.

netnews: /net'n[y]ooz/ n. 1. The software that makes {USENET}
  run.  2. The content of USENET.  "I read netnews right after my
  mail most mornings."

netrock: /net'rok/ [IBM] n. A {flame}; used esp. on VNET,
  IBM's internal corporate network.

network address: n. (also `net address') As used by hackers,
  means an address on `the' network (see {network, the}; this is
  almost always a {bang path} or {{Internet address}}).  Such an
  address is essential if one wants to be to be taken seriously by
  hackers; in particular, persons or organizations that claim to
  understand, work with, sell to, or recruit from among hackers but
  *don't* display net addresses are quietly presumed to be
  clueless poseurs and mentally flushed (see {flush}, sense 4).
  Hackers often put their net addresses on their business cards and
  wear them prominently in contexts where they expect to meet other
  hackers face-to-face (see also {{science-fiction fandom}}).  This
  is mostly functional, but is also a signal that one identifies with
  hackerdom (like lodge pins among Masons or tie-dyed T-shirts among
  Grateful Dead fans).  Net addresses are often used in email text as
  a more concise substitute for personal names; indeed, hackers may
  come to know each other quite well by network names without ever
  learning each others' `legal' monikers.  See also {sitename},
  {domainist}.

network meltdown: n. A state of complete network overload; the
  network equivalent of {thrash}ing.  This may be induced by a
  {Chernobyl packet}.  See also {broadcast storm}, {kamikaze
  packet}.

network, the: n. 1. The union of all the major noncommercial,
  academic, and hacker-oriented networks, such as Internet, the old
  ARPANET, NSFnet, {BITNET}, and the virtual UUCP and {USENET}
  `networks', plus the corporate in-house networks and commercial
  time-sharing services (such as CompuServe) that gateway to them.  A
  site is generally considered `on the network' if it can be reached
  through some combination of Internet-style (@-sign) and UUCP
  (bang-path) addresses.  See {bang path}, {{Internet address}},
  {network address}.  2. A fictional conspiracy of libertarian
  hacker-subversives and anti-authoritarian monkeywrenchers described
  in Robert Anton Wilson's novel `Schr"odinger's Cat', to which
  many hackers have subsequently decided they belong (this is an
  example of {ha ha only serious}).

  In sense 1, `network' is often abbreviated to `net'.  "Are
  you on the net?" is a frequent question when hackers first meet
  face to face, and "See you on the net!" is a frequent goodbye.

New Jersey: [primarily Stanford/Silicon Valley] adj. Brain-damaged
  or of poor design.  This refers to the allegedly wretched quality
  of such software as C, C++, and UNIX (which originated at Bell Labs
  in Murray Hill, New Jersey).  "This compiler bites the bag, but
  what can you expect from a compiler designed in New Jersey?"
  Compare {Berkeley Quality Software}.  See also {UNIX
  conspiracy}.

New Testament: n. [C programmers] The second edition of K&R's
  `The C Programming Language' (Prentice-Hall, 1988; ISBN
  0-13-110362-8), describing ANSI Standard C.  See {K&R}.

newbie: /n[y]oo'bee/ n. [orig. from British public-school and
  military slang variant of `new boy'] A USENET neophyte.
  This term surfaced in the {newsgroup} talk.bizarre but is
  now in wide use.  Criteria for being considered a newbie vary
  wildly; a person can be called a newbie in one newsgroup while
  remaining a respected regular in another.  The label `newbie'
  is sometimes applied as a serious insult to a person who has been
  around USENET for a long time but who carefully hides all evidence
  of having a clue.  See {BIFF}.

newgroup wars: /n[y]oo'groop wohrz/ [USENET] n. The salvos of dueling
  `newgroup' and `rmgroup' messages sometimes exchanged by
  persons on opposite sides of a dispute over whether a {newsgroup}
  should be created net-wide.  These usually settle out within a week
  or two as it becomes clear whether the group has a natural
  constituency (usually, it doesn't).  At times, especially in the
  completely anarchic alt hierarchy, the names of newsgroups
  themselves become a form of comment or humor; e.g., the spinoff of
  alt.swedish.chef.bork.bork.bork from alt.tv.muppets in
  early 1990, or any number of specialized abuse groups named after
  particularly notorious {flamer}s, e.g., alt.weemba.

newline: /n[y]oo'li:n/ n. 1. [techspeak, primarily UNIX] The
  ASCII LF character (0001010), used under {{UNIX}} as a text line
  terminator.  A Bell-Labs-ism rather than a Berkeleyism;
  interestingly (and unusually for UNIX jargon), it is said to have
  originally been an IBM usage.  (Though the term `newline' appears
  in ASCII standards, it never caught on in the general computing
  world before UNIX).  2. More generally, any magic character,
  character sequence, or operation (like Pascal's writeln procedure)
  required to terminate a text record or separate lines.  See
  {crlf}, {terpri}.

NeWS: /nee'wis/, /n[y]oo'is/ or /n[y]ooz/ [acronym; the
  `Network Window System'] n. The road not taken in window systems, an
  elegant PostScript-based environment that would almost certainly
  have won the standards war with {X} if it hadn't been
  {proprietary} to Sun Microsystems.  There is a lesson here that
  too many software vendors haven't yet heeded.  Many hackers insist
  on the two-syllable pronunciations above as a way of distinguishing
  NeWS from {news} (the {netnews} software).

news: n. See {netnews}.

newsfroup: // [USENET] n. Silly synonym for {newsgroup},
  originally a typo but now in regular use on USENET's talk.bizarre
  and other lunatic-fringe groups.

newsgroup: [USENET] n. One of {USENET}'s huge collection of
  topic groups or {fora}.  Usenet groups can be `unmoderated'
  (anyone can post) or `moderated' (submissions are automatically
  directed to a moderator, who edits or filters and then posts the
  results).  Some newsgroups have parallel {mailing list}s for
  Internet people with no netnews access, with postings to the group
  automatically propagated to the list and vice versa.  Some
  moderated groups (especially those which are actually gatewayed
  Internet mailing lists) are distributed as `digests', with groups
  of postings periodically collected into a single large posting with
  an index.

  Among the best-known are comp.lang.c (the C-language forum),
  comp.arch (on computer architectures), comp.unix.wizards
  (for UNIX wizards), rec.arts.sf-lovers (for science-fiction
  fans), and talk.politics.misc (miscellaneous political
  discussions and {flamage}).

nickle: /ni'kl/ [from `nickel', common name for the U.S.
  5-cent coin] n. A {nybble} + 1; 5 bits.  Reported among
  developers for Mattel's GI 1600 (the Intellivision games
  processor), a chip with 16-bit-wide RAM but 10-bit-wide ROM.  See
  also {deckle}.

night mode: n. See {phase} (of people).

Nightmare File System: n. Pejorative hackerism for Sun's Network
  File System (NFS).  In any nontrivial network of Suns where there
  is a lot of NFS cross-mounting, when one Sun goes down, the others
  often freeze up.  Some machine tries to access the down one, and
  (getting no response) repeats indefinitely.  This causes it to
  appear dead to some messages (what is actually happening is that
  it is locked up in what should have been a brief excursion to a
  higher {spl} level).  Then another machine tries to reach either
  the down machine or the pseudo-down machine, and itself becomes
  pseudo-down.  The first machine to discover the down one is now
  trying both to access the down one and to respond to the pseudo-down
  one, so it is even harder to reach.  This snowballs very fast, and
  soon the entire network of machines is frozen --- the user can't
  even abort the file access that started the problem!  (ITS
  partisans are apt to cite this as proof of UNIX's alleged bogosity;
  ITS had a working NFS-like shared file system with none of these
  problems in the early 1970s.)  See also {broadcast storm}.

NIL: /nil/ [from LISP terminology for `false'] No.  Used
  in reply to a question, particularly one asked using the
  `-P' convention.  See {T}.

NMI: /N-M-I/ n. Non-Maskable Interrupt.  An IRQ 7 on the PDP-11
  or 680[01234]0; the NMI line on an 80{88,[1234]}86.  In contrast
  with a {priority interrupt} (which might be ignored, although
  that is unlikely), an NMI is *never* ignored.

no-op: /noh'op/ alt. NOP /nop/ [no operation] n. 1. (also v.)
  A machine instruction that does nothing (sometimes used in
  assembler-level programming as filler for data or patch areas, or
  to overwrite code to be removed in binaries).  See also {JFCL}.
  2. A person who contributes nothing to a project, or has nothing
  going on upstairs, or both.  As in "He's a no-op." 3. Any
  operation or sequence of operations with no effect, such as
  circling the block without finding a parking space, or putting
  money into a vending machine and having it fall immediately into
  the coin-return box, or asking someone for help and being told to
  go away.  "Oh, well, that was a no-op."  Hot-and-sour soup (see
  {great-wall}) that is insufficiently either is `no-op soup';
  so is wonton soup if everybody else is having hot-and-sour.


noddy: /nod'ee/ [UK: from the children's books] adj.
  1. Small and un-useful, but demonstrating a point.  Noddy programs
  are often written by people learning a new language or system.  The
  archetypal noddy program is {hello, world}.  Noddy code may be
  used to demonstrate a feature or bug of a compiler.  May be used of
  real hardware or software to imply that it isn't worth using.
  "This editor's a bit noddy."  2. A program that is more or less
  instant to produce.  In this use, the term does not necessarily
  connote uselessness, but describes a {hack} sufficiently trivial
  that it can be written and debugged while carrying on (and during
  the space of) a normal conversation.  "I'll just throw together a
  noddy {awk} script to dump all the first fields."  In North
  America this might be called a {mickey mouse program}.  See
  {toy program}.

NOMEX underwear: /noh'meks uhn'-der-weir/ [USENET] n. Syn.
  {asbestos longjohns}, used mostly in auto-related mailing lists
  and newsgroups.  NOMEX underwear is an actual product available on
  the racing equipment market, used as a fire resistance measure and
  required in some racing series.

non-optimal solution: n. (also `sub-optimal solution') An
  astoundingly stupid way to do something.  This term is generally
  used in deadpan sarcasm, as its impact is greatest when the person
  speaking looks completely serious.  Compare {stunning}.  See also
  {Bad Thing}.

nonlinear: adj. [scientific computation] 1. Behaving in an erratic and
  unpredictable fashion.  When used to describe the behavior of a
  machine or program, it suggests that said machine or program is
  being forced to run far outside of design specifications.  This
  behavior may be induced by unreasonable inputs, or may be triggered
  when a more mundane bug sends the computation far off from its
  expected course.  2. When describing the behavior of a person,
  suggests a tantrum or a {flame}.  "When you talk to Bob, don't
  mention the drug problem or he'll go nonlinear for hours."  In
  this context, `go nonlinear' connotes `blow up out of proportion'
  (proportion connotes linearity).

nontrivial: adj. Requiring real thought or significant computing
  power.  Often used as an understated way of saying that a problem
  is quite difficult or impractical, or even entirely unsolvable
  ("Proving P=NP is nontrivial").  The preferred emphatic form is
  `decidedly nontrivial'.  See {trivial}, {uninteresting},
  {interesting}.

notwork: /not'werk/ n. A network, when it is acting {flaky} or is
  {down}.  Compare {nyetwork}.  Said at IBM to have orig.
  referred to a particular period of flakiness on IBM's VNET
  corporate network, ca. 1988; but there are independent reports of
  the term from elsewhere.

NP-: /N-P/ pref. Extremely.  Used to modify adjectives
  describing a level or quality of difficulty; the connotation is
  often `more so than it should be' (NP-complete problems all seem to
  be very hard, but so far no one has found a good a priori reason
  that they should be.)  "Getting this algorithm to perform
  correctly in every case is NP-annoying."  This is generalized from
  the computer-science terms `NP-hard' and `NP-complete'.  NP is
  the set of Nondeterministic-Polynomial algorithms, those that can
  be completed by a nondeterministic Turing machine in an amount of
  time that is a polynomial function of the size of the input; a
  solution for one NP-complete problem would solve all the others.

NSA line eater: n. The National Security Agency trawling
  program sometimes assumed to be reading {USENET} for the
  U.S. Government's spooks.  Most hackers describe it as a mythical
  beast, but some believe it actually exists, more aren't sure, and
  many believe in acting as though it exists just in case.  Some
  netters put loaded phrases like `KGB', `Uzi', `nuclear materials',
  `Palestine', `cocaine', and `assassination' in their {sig block}s
  in a (probably futile) attempt to confuse and overload the
  creature.  The {GNU} version of {EMACS} actually has a command
  that randomly inserts a bunch of insidious anarcho-verbiage into
  your edited text.

  There is a mainstream variant of this myth involving a `Trunk Line
  Monitor', which supposedly used speech recognition to extract words
  from telephone trunks.  This one was making the rounds in the
  late 1970s, spread by people who had no idea of then-current
  technology or the storage, signal-processing, or speech recognition
  needs of such a project.  On the basis of mass-storage costs alone
  it would have been cheaper to hire 50 high-school students and just
  let them listen in.  Speech-recognition technology can't do this
  job even now (1991), and almost certainly won't in this millennium,
  either.  The peak of silliness came with a letter to an alternative
  paper in New Haven, Connecticut, laying out the factoids of this
  Big Brotherly affair.  The letter writer then revealed his actual
  agenda by offering --- at an amazing low price, just this once, we
  take VISA and MasterCard --- a scrambler guaranteed to daunt the
  Trunk Trawler and presumably allowing the would-be Baader-Meinhof
  gangs of the world to get on with their business.

nuke: vt. 1. To intentionally delete the entire contents of a
  given directory or storage volume.  "On UNIX, `rm -r /usr'
  will nuke everything in the usr filesystem."  Never used for
  accidental deletion.  Oppose {blow away}.  2. Syn. for
  {dike}, applied to smaller things such as files, features, or
  code sections.  Often used to express a final verdict.  "What do
  you want me to do with that 80-meg {wallpaper} file?"  "Nuke
  it."  3. Used of processes as well as files; nuke is a frequent
  verbal alias for `kill -9' on UNIX.  4. On IBM PCs, a bug
  that results in {fandango on core} can trash the operating
  system, including the FAT (the in-core copy of the disk block
  chaining information).  This can utterly scramble attached disks,
  which are then said to have been `nuked'.  This term is also
  used of analogous lossages on Macintoshes and other micros without
  memory protection.

number-crunching: n. Computations of a numerical nature, esp.
  those that make extensive use of floating-point numbers.  The only
  thing {Fortrash} is good for.  This term is in widespread
  informal use outside hackerdom and even in mainstream slang, but
  has additional hackish connotations: namely, that the computations
  are mindless and involve massive use of {brute force}.  This is
  not always {evil}, esp. if it involves ray tracing or fractals
  or some other use that makes {pretty pictures}, esp. if such
  pictures can be used as {wallpaper}.  See also {crunch}.

numbers: [scientific computation] n. Output of a computation that
  may not be significant results but at least indicate that the
  program is running.  May be used to placate management, grant
  sponsors, etc.  `Making numbers' means running a program
  because output --- any output, not necessarily meaningful output
  --- is needed as a demonstration of progress.  See {pretty
  pictures}, {math-out}, {social science number}.

NUXI problem: /nuk'see pro'bl*m/ n. This refers to the problem of
  transferring data between machines with differing byte-order.  The
  string `UNIX' might look like `NUXI' on a machine with a
  different `byte sex' (e.g., when transferring data from a
  {little-endian} to a {big-endian}, or vice-versa).  See also
  {middle-endian}, {swab}, and {bytesexual}.

nybble: /nib'l/ (alt. `nibble') [from v. `nibble' by analogy
  with `bite' => `byte'] n. Four bits; one {hex} digit;
  a half-byte.  Though `byte' is now techspeak, this useful relative
  is still jargon.  Compare {{byte}}, {crumb}, {tayste},
  {dynner}; see also {bit}, {nickle}, {deckle}.  Apparently
  this spelling is uncommon in Commonwealth Hackish, as British
  orthography suggests the pronunciation /ni:'bl/.

nyetwork: /nyet'werk/ [from Russian `nyet' = no] n. A network,
  when it is acting {flaky} or is {down}.  Compare {notwork}.

= O =
=====

Ob-: /ob/ pref. Obligatory.  A piece of {netiquette}
  acknowledging that the author has been straying from the newsgroup's
  charter topic.  For example, if a posting in alt.sex is a response
  to a part of someone else's posting that has nothing particularly
  to do with sex, the author may append `ObSex' (or `Obsex') and toss
  off a question or vignette about some unusual erotic act.  It is
  considered a sign of great {winnitude} when your Obs are more
  interesting than other people's whole postings.

Obfuscated C Contest: n. An annual contest run since 1984 over
  USENET by Landon Curt Noll and friends.  The overall winner is
  whoever produces the most unreadable, creative, and bizarre (but
  working) C program; various other prizes are awarded at the judges'
  whim.  C's terse syntax and macro-preprocessor facilities give
  contestants a lot of maneuvering room.  The winning programs often
  manage to be simultaneously (a) funny, (b) breathtaking works of
  art, and (c) horrible examples of how *not* to code in C.

  This relatively short and sweet entry might help convey the flavor
  of obfuscated C:

    /*
     * HELLO WORLD program
     * by Jack Applin and Robert Heckendorn, 1985
     */
    main(v,c)char**c;{for(v[c++]="Hello, world!\n)";
    (!!c)[*c]&&(v--||--c&&execlp(*c,*c,c[!!c]+!!c,!c));
    **c=!c)write(!!*c,*c,!!**c);}

  Here's another good one:

    /*
     * Program to compute an approximation of pi
     *  by Brian Westley, 1988
     */

    #define _ -F<00||--F-OO--;
    int F=00,OO=00;
    main(){F_OO();printf("%1.3f\n",4.*-F/OO/OO);}F_OO()
    {
                _-_-_-_
           _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
        _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
      _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
     _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
     _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
     _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
     _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
      _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
        _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
            _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
                _-_-_-_
    }

  See also {hello, world}.

obi-wan error: /oh'bee-won` er'*r/ [RPI, from `off-by-one' and
  the Obi-Wan Kenobi character in "Star Wars"] n.  A loop of
  some sort in which the index is off by 1.  Common when the index
  should have started from 0 but instead started from 1.  A kind of
  {off-by-one error}.  See also {zeroth}.

Objectionable-C: n. Hackish take on "Objective-C", the name of an
  object-oriented dialect of C in competition with the
  better-known C++ (it is used to write native applications on the NeXT
  machine).  Objectionable-C uses a Smalltalk-like syntax, but lacks
  the flexibility of Smalltalk method calls, and (like many such
  efforts) comes frustratingly close to attaining the {Right Thing}
  without actually doing so.

obscure: adj. Used in an exaggeration of its normal meaning, to
  imply total incomprehensibility.  "The reason for that last crash
  is obscure."  "The `find(1)' command's syntax is obscure!"
  The phrase `moderately obscure' implies that it could be
  figured out but probably isn't worth the trouble.  The construction
  `obscure in the extreme' is the preferred emphatic form.

octal forty: /ok'tl for'tee/ n. Hackish way of saying "I'm
  drawing a blank."  Octal 40 is the {{ASCII}} space character,
  0100000; by an odd coincidence, {hex} 40 (01000000) is the
  {{EBCDIC}} space character.  See {wall}.

off the trolley: adj. Describes the behavior of a program that
  malfunctions and goes catatonic, but doesn't actually {crash} or
  abort.  See {glitch}, {bug}, {deep space}.

off-by-one error: n. Exceedingly common error induced in many
  ways, such as by starting at 0 when you should have started at 1 or
  vice versa, or by writing `< N' instead of `<= N' or
  vice-versa.  Also applied to giving something to the person next to
  the one who should have gotten it.  Often confounded with
  {fencepost error}, which is properly a particular subtype of it.

offline: adv. Not now or not here.  "Let's take this
  discussion offline."  Specifically used on {USENET} to suggest
  that a discussion be taken off a public newsgroup to email.

old fart: n. Tribal elder.  A title self-assumed with remarkable
  frequency by (esp.) USENETters who have been programming for more
  than about 25 years; often appears in {sig block}s attached to
  Jargon File contributions of great archeological significance.
  This is a term of insult in the second or third person but one of
  pride in first person.

Old Testament: n. [C programmers] The first edition of {K&R}, the
  sacred text describing {Classic C}.

one-line fix: n. Used (often sarcastically) of a change to a
  program that is thought to be trivial or insignificant right up to
  the moment it crashes the system.  Usually `cured' by another
  one-line fix.  See also {I didn't change anything!}

one-liner wars: n. A game popular among hackers who code in the
  language APL (see {write-only language}).  The objective is to
  see who can code the most interesting and/or useful routine in one
  line of operators chosen from APL's exceedingly {hairy} primitive
  set.  A similar amusement was practiced among {TECO} hackers.

  Ken Iverson, the inventor of APL, has been credited with a
  one-liner that, given a number N, produces a list of the
  prime numbers from 1 to N inclusive.  It looks like this:

       (2 = 0 +.= T o.| T) / T <- iN

  where `o' is the APL null character, the assignment arrow is a
  single character, and `i' represents the APL iota.

ooblick: /oo'blik/ [from Dr. Seuss's `Bartholomew and the
  Oobleck'] n. A bizarre semi-liquid sludge made from cornstarch and
  water.  Enjoyed among hackers who make batches during playtime at
  parties for its amusing and extremely non-Newtonian behavior; it
  pours and splatters, but resists rapid motion like a solid and will
  even crack when hit by a hammer.  Often found near lasers.

  Here is a field-tested ooblick recipe contributed by GLS:

    1 cup cornstarch

    1 cup baking soda

    3/4 cup water

    N drops of food coloring

  This recipe isn't quite as non-Newtonian as a pure cornstarch
  ooblick, but has an appropriately slimy feel.

  Some, however, insist that the notion of an ooblick *recipe*
  is far too mechanical, and that it is best to add the water in
  small increments so that the various mixed states the cornstarch
  goes through as it *becomes* ooblick can be grokked in
  fullness by many hands.  For optional ingredients of this
  experience, see the "Ceremonial Chemicals" section of
  appendix B.

open: n. Abbreviation for `open (or left) parenthesis' --- used when
  necessary to eliminate oral ambiguity.  To read aloud the LISP form
  (DEFUN FOO (X) (PLUS X 1)) one might say: "Open defun foo, open
  eks close, open, plus eks one, close close."

open switch: [IBM: prob. from railroading] n. An unresolved
  question, issue, or problem.

operating system:: [techspeak] n. (Often abbreviated `OS') The
  foundation software of a machine, of course; that which schedules
  tasks, allocates storage, and presents a default interface to the
  user between applications.  The facilities an operating system
  provides and its general design philosophy exert an extremely
  strong influence on programming style and on the technical cultures
  that grow up around its host machines.  Hacker folklore has been
  shaped primarily by the {{UNIX}}, {{ITS}}, {{TOPS-10}},
  {{TOPS-20}}/{{TWENEX}}, {{WAITS}}, {{CP/M}}, {{MS-DOS}}, and
  {{Multics}} operating systems (most importantly by ITS and
  UNIX).

Orange Book: n. The U.S. Government's standards document
  `Trusted Computer System Evaluation Criteria, DOD standard
  5200.28-STD, December, 1985' which characterize secure computing
  architectures and defines levels A1 (most secure) through D (least).
  Stock UNIXes are roughly C2, and can be upgraded to about C1
  without excessive pain.  See also {{book titles}}.

oriental food:: n. Hackers display an intense tropism towards
  oriental cuisine, especially Chinese, and especially of the spicier
  varieties such as Szechuan and Hunan.  This phenomenon (which has
  also been observed in subcultures that overlap heavily with
  hackerdom, most notably science-fiction fandom) has never been
  satisfactorily explained, but is sufficiently intense that one can
  assume the target of a hackish dinner expedition to be the best
  local Chinese place and be right at least three times out of four.
  See also {ravs}, {great-wall}, {stir-fried random},
  {laser chicken}, {Yu-Shiang Whole Fish}.  Thai, Indian,
  Korean, and Vietnamese cuisines are also quite popular.

orphan: [UNIX] n. A process whose parent has died; one inherited by
  `init(1)'.  Compare {zombie}.

orphaned i-node: /or'f*nd i:'nohd/ [UNIX] n. 1. [techspeak] A
  file that retains storage but no longer appears in the directories
  of a filesystem.  2. By extension, a pejorative for any person
  serving no useful function within some organization, esp.
  {lion food} without subordinates.

orthogonal: [from mathematics] adj. Mutually independent; well
  separated; sometimes, irrelevant to.  Used in a generalization of
  its mathematical meaning to describe sets of primitives or
  capabilities that, like a vector basis in geometry, span the
  entire `capability space' of the system and are in some sense
  non-overlapping or mutually independent.  For example, in
  architectures such as the PDP-11 or VAX where all or nearly all
  registers can be used interchangeably in any role with respect to
  any instruction, the register set is said to be orthogonal.  Or, in
  logic, the set of operators `not' and `or' is orthogonal,
  but the set `nand', `or', and `not' is not (because any
  one of these can be expressed in terms of the others).  Also used
  in comments on human discourse: "This may be orthogonal to the
  discussion, but...."

OS: /O-S/ 1. [Operating System] n. An acronym heavily used in email,
  occasionally in speech. 2. n.,obs. On ITS, an output spy.  See
  appendix A.

OS/2: /O S too/ n. The anointed successor to MS-DOS for Intel
  286- and 386-based micros; proof that IBM/Microsoft couldn't get it
  right the second time, either.  Mentioning it is usually good for a
  cheap laugh among hackers --- the design was so {baroque}, and
  the implementation of 1.x so bad, that 3 years after introduction
  you could still count the major {app}s shipping for it on the
  fingers of two hands --- in unary.  Often called `Half-an-OS'.  On
  January 28, 1991, Microsoft announced that it was dropping its OS/2
  development to concentrate on Windows, leaving the OS entirely in
  the hands of IBM; on January 29 they claimed the media had got the
  story wrong, but were vague about how.  It looks as though OS/2 is
  moribund.  See {vaporware}, {monstrosity}, {cretinous},
  {second-system effect}.

out-of-band: [from telecommunications and network theory] adj.
  1. In software, describes values of a function which are not in its
  `natural' range of return values, but are rather signals that
  some kind of exception has occurred.  Many C functions, for
  example, return either a nonnegative integral value, or indicate
  failure with an out-of-band return value of -1.  Compare
  {hidden flag}, {green bytes}.  2. Also sometimes used to
  describe what communications people call `shift characters',
  like the ESC that leads control sequences for many terminals, or
  the level shift indicators in the old 5-bit Baudot codes.  3. In
  personal communication, using methods other than email, such as
  telephones or {snail-mail}.

overflow bit: n. 1. [techspeak] On some processors, an attempt to
  calculate a result too large for a register to hold causes a
  particular {flag} called an {overflow bit} to be set.
  2. Hackers use the term of human thought too.  "Well, the {{Ada}}
  description was {baroque} all right, but I could hack it OK until
  they got to the exception handling ... that set my overflow bit."
  3. The hypothetical bit that will be set if a hacker doesn't get to
  make a trip to the Room of Porcelain Fixtures: "I'd better process
  an internal interrupt before the overflow bit gets set".

overrun: n. 1. [techspeak] Term for a frequent consequence of data
  arriving faster than it can be consumed, esp. in serial line
  communications.  For example, at 9600 baud there is almost exactly
  one character per millisecond, so if your {silo} can hold only
  two characters and the machine takes longer than 2 msec to get to
  service the interrupt, at least one character will be lost.  2. Also
  applied to non-serial-I/O communications. "I forgot to pay my
  electric bill due to mail overrun." "Sorry, I got four phone
  calls in 3 minutes last night and lost your message to
  overrun."  When {thrash}ing at tasks, the next person to make a
  request might be told "Overrun!"  3. More loosely, may refer to a
  {buffer overflow} not necessarily related to processing time (as
  in {overrun screw}).

overrun screw: [C programming] n. A variety of {fandango on core}
  produced by scribbling past the end of an array (C has no checks
  for this).  This is relatively benign and easy to spot if the array
  is static; if it is auto, the result may be to {smash the stack}
  --- often resulting in {heisenbug}s of the most diabolical
  subtlety.  The term `overrun screw' is used esp. of scribbles
  beyond the end of arrays allocated with `malloc(3)'; this
  typically trashes the allocation header for the next block in the
  {arena}, producing massive lossage within malloc and often
  a core dump on the next operation to use `stdio(3)' or
  `malloc(3)' itself.  See {spam}, {overrun}; see also
  {memory leak}, {aliasing bug}, {precedence lossage},
  {fandango on core}, {secondary damage}.

= P =
=====

P.O.D.: /P-O-D/ Acronym for `Piece Of Data' (as opposed to a
  code section). Usage: pedantic and rare.  See also {pod}.

padded cell: n. Where you put {luser}s so they can't hurt
  anything.  A program that limits a luser to a carefully restricted
  subset of the capabilities of the host system (for example, the
  `rsh(1)' utility on USG UNIX).  Note that this is different
  from an {iron box} because it is overt and not aimed at
  enforcing security so much as protecting others (and the luser)
  from the consequences of the luser's boundless na"ivet'e (see
  {na"ive}).  Also `padded cell environment'.

page in: [MIT] vi. 1. To become aware of one's surroundings again after
  having paged out (see {page out}).  Usually confined to the sarcastic
  comment: "Eric pages in.  Film at 11."  See {film at 11}.
  2. Syn. `swap in'; see {swap}.

page out: [MIT] vi. 1. To become unaware of one's surroundings
  temporarily, due to daydreaming or preoccupation.  "Can you repeat
  that?  I paged out for a minute."  See {page in}.  Compare
  {glitch}, {thinko}.  2. Syn. `swap out'; see {swap}.

pain in the net: n. A {flamer}.

paper-net: n. Hackish way of referring to the postal service,
  analogizing it to a very slow, low-reliability network.  USENET
  {sig block}s not uncommonly include a "Paper-Net:" header just
  before the sender's postal address; common variants of this are
  "Papernet" and "P-Net".  Compare {voice-net}, {snail-mail}.

param: /p*-ram'/ n. Shorthand for `parameter'.  See also
  {parm}; Compare {arg}, {var}.

parent message: n. See {followup}.

parity errors: pl.n. Little lapses of attention or (in more severe
  cases) consciousness, usually brought on by having spent all night
  and most of the next day hacking.  "I need to go home and crash;
  I'm starting to get a lot of parity errors."  Derives from a
  relatively common but nearly always correctable transient error in
  RAM hardware.

Parkinson's Law of Data: prov. "Data expands to fill the space
  available for storage"; buying more memory encourages the use of
  more memory-intensive techniques.  It has been observed over the
  last 10 years that the memory usage of evolving systems tends to
  double roughly once every 18 months.  Fortunately, memory density
  available for constant dollars tends to double about once every
  12 months (see {Moore's Law}); unfortunately, the laws of
  physics guarantee that the latter cannot continue indefinitely.

parm: /parm/ n. Further-compressed form of {param}.  This term
  is an IBMism, and written use is almost unknown outside IBM
  shops; spoken /parm/ is more widely distributed, but the synonym
  {arg} is favored among hackers.  Compare {arg}, {var}.

parse: [from linguistic terminology] vt. 1. To determine the
  syntactic structure of a sentence or other utterance (close to the
  standard English meaning).  "That was the one I saw you."  "I
  can't parse that."  2. More generally, to understand or
  comprehend.  "It's very simple; you just kretch the glims and then
  aos the zotz."  "I can't parse that."  3. Of fish, to have to
  remove the bones yourself.  "I object to parsing fish", means "I
  don't want to get a whole fish, but a sliced one is okay".  A
  `parsed fish' has been deboned.  There is some controversy over
  whether `unparsed' should mean `bony', or also mean
  `deboned'.

Pascal:: n. An Algol-descended language designed by Niklaus Wirth
  on the CDC 6600 around 1967--68 as an instructional tool for
  elementary programming.  This language, designed primarily to keep
  students from shooting themselves in the foot and thus extremely
  restrictive from a general-purpose-programming point of view, was
  later promoted as a general-purpose tool and, in fact, became the
  ancestor of a large family of languages including Modula-2 and
  {{Ada}} (see also {bondage-and-discipline language}).  The
  hackish point of view on Pascal was probably best summed up by a
  devastating (and, in its deadpan way, screamingly funny) 1981 paper
  by Brian Kernighan (of {K&R} fame) entitled "Why Pascal is
  Not My Favorite Programming Language", which was never formally
  published but has circulated widely via photocopies.  Part of his
  discussion is worth repeating here, because its criticisms are
  still apposite to Pascal itself after ten years of improvement and
  could also stand as an indictment of many other
  bondage-and-discipline languages.  At the end of a summary of the
  case against Pascal, Kernighan wrote:

    9. There is no escape

    This last point is perhaps the most important.  The language is
    inadequate but circumscribed, because there is no way to escape its
    limitations.  There are no casts to disable the type-checking when
    necessary.  There is no way to replace the defective run-time
    environment with a sensible one, unless one controls the compiler that
    defines the "standard procedures".  The language is closed.

    People who use Pascal for serious programming fall into a fatal trap.
    Because the language is impotent, it must be extended.  But each group
    extends Pascal in its own direction, to make it look like whatever
    language they really want.  Extensions for separate compilation,
    FORTRAN-like COMMON, string data types, internal static variables,
    initialization, octal numbers, bit operators, etc., all add to the
    utility of the language for one group but destroy its portability to
    others.

    I feel that it is a mistake to use Pascal for anything much beyond its
    original target.  In its pure form, Pascal is a toy language, suitable
    for teaching but not for real programming.

  Pascal has since been almost entirely displaced (by {C}) from the
  niches it had acquired in serious applications and systems
  programming, but retains some popularity as a hobbyist language in
  the MS-DOS and Macintosh worlds.

patch: 1. n. A temporary addition to a piece of code, usually as a
  {quick-and-dirty} remedy to an existing bug or misfeature.  A
  patch may or may not work, and may or may not eventually be
  incorporated permanently into the program.  Distinguished from a
  {diff} or {mod} by the fact that a patch is generated by more
  primitive means than the rest of the program; the classical
  examples are instructions modified by using the front panel
  switches, and changes made directly to the binary executable of a
  program originally written in an {HLL}.  Compare {one-line
  fix}.  2. vt. To insert a patch into a piece of code.  3. [in the
  UNIX world] n. A {diff} (sense 2).  4. A set of modifications to
  binaries to be applied by a patching program.  IBM operating
  systems often receive updates to the operating system in the form
  of absolute hexadecimal patches.  If you have modified your OS, you
  have to disassemble these back to the source.  The patches might
  later be corrected by other patches on top of them (patches were
  said to "grow scar tissue").  The result was often a convoluted
  {patch space} and headaches galore.

  There is a classic story of a {tiger team} penetrating a secure
  military computer that illustrates the danger inherent in binary
  patches (or, indeed, any that you can't --- or don't --- inspect
  and examine before installing).  They couldn't find any {trap
  door}s or any way to penetrate security of IBM's OS, so they made a
  site visit to an IBM office (remember, these were official military
  types who were purportedly on official business), swiped some IBM
  stationery, and created a fake patch.  The patch was actually the
  trapdoor they needed.  The patch was distributed at about the right
  time for an IBM patch, had official stationery and all accompanying
  documentation, and was dutifully installed.  The installation
  manager very shortly thereafter learned something about proper
  procedures.

patch space: n. An unused block of bits left in a binary so that
  it can later be modified by insertion of machine-language
  instructions there (typically, the patch space is modified to
  contain new code, and the superseded code is patched to contain a
  jump or call to the patch space).  The widening use of HLLs has
  made this term rare; it is now primarily historical outside IBM
  shops.  See {patch} (sense 4), {zap} (sense 4), {hook}.

path: n. 1. A {bang path} or explicitly routed {{Internet
  address}}; a node-by-node specification of a link between two
  machines.  2. [UNIX] A filename, fully specified relative to the
  root directory (as opposed to relative to the current directory;
  the latter is sometimes called a `relative path'). This is also
  called a `pathname'.  3. [UNIX and MS-DOS] The `search
  path', an environment variable specifying the directories in which
  the {shell} (COMMAND.COM, under MS-DOS) should look for commands.
  Other, similar constructs abound under UNIX (for example, the
  C preprocessor has a `search path' it uses in looking for
  `#include' files).

pathological: adj. 1. [scientific computation] Used of a data set
  that is grossly atypical of normal expected input, esp. one that
  exposes a weakness or bug in whatever algorithm one is using.  An
  algorithm that can be broken by pathological inputs may still be
  useful if such inputs are very unlikely to occur in practice.
  2. When used of test input, implies that it was purposefully
  engineered as a worst case.  The implication in both senses is that
  the data is spectacularly ill-conditioned or that someone had to
  explicitly set out to break the algorithm in order to come up with
  such a crazy example.  3. Also said of an unlikely collection of
  circumstances.  "If the network is down and comes up halfway
  through the execution of that command by root, the system may
  just crash."  "Yes, but that's a pathological case."  Often used
  to dismiss the case from discussion, with the implication that the
  consequences are acceptable since that they will happen so
  infrequently (if at all) that there is no justification for
  going to extra trouble to handle that case (see sense 1).

payware: /pay'weir/ n. Commercial software.  Oppose {shareware}
  or {freeware}.

PBD: /P-B-D/ [abbrev. of `Programmer Brain Damage'] n.  Applied
  to bug reports revealing places where the program was obviously
  broken by an incompetent or short-sighted programmer.  Compare
  {UBD}; see also {brain-damaged}.

PC-ism: /P-C-izm/ n. A piece of code or coding technique that
  takes advantage of the unprotected single-tasking environment in
  IBM PCs and the like, e.g., by busy-waiting on a hardware register,
  direct diddling of screen memory, or using hard timing loops.
  Compare {ill-behaved}, {vaxism}, {unixism}.  Also,
  `PC-ware' n., a program full of PC-isms on a machine with a more
  capable operating system.  Pejorative.

PD: /P-D/ adj. Common abbreviation for `public domain', applied
  to software distributed over {USENET} and from Internet archive
  sites.  Much of this software is not in fact public domain in
  the legal sense but travels under various copyrights granting
  reproduction and use rights to anyone who can {snarf} a copy.  See
  {copyleft}.

pdl: /pid'l/ or /puhd'l/ [acronym for `Push Down List'] 1. In
  ITS days, the preferred MITism for {stack}.  2. Dave Lebling, one
  of the co-authors of {Zork}; (his {network address} on the ITS
  machines was at one time pdl@dms).  3. `Program Design Language'.
  Any of a large class of formal and profoundly useless
  pseudo-languages in which {management} forces one to design
  programs.  {Management} often expects it to be maintained in
  parallel with the code.  See also {{flowchart}}.  4. To design
  using a program design language.  "I've been pdling so long my
  eyes won't focus beyond 2 feet."

PDP-10: [Programmed Data Processor model 10] n. The machine that
  made timesharing real.  It looms large in hacker folklore because
  of its adoption in the mid-1970s by many university computing
  facilities and research labs, including the MIT AI Lab, Stanford,
  and CMU.  Some aspects of the instruction set (most notably the
  bit-field instructions) are still considered unsurpassed.  The 10
  was eventually eclipsed by the VAX machines (descendants of the
  PDP-11) when DEC recognized that the 10 and VAX product lines were
  competing with each other and decided to concentrate its software
  development effort on the more profitable VAX.  The machine was
  finally dropped from DEC's line in 1983, following the failure of
  the Jupiter Project at DEC to build a viable new model. (Some
  attempts by other companies to market clones came to nothing; see
  {Foonly}) This event spelled the doom of {{ITS}} and the
  technical cultures that had spawned the original Jargon File, but
  by mid-1991 it had become something of a badge of honorable
  old-timerhood among hackers to have cut one's teeth on a PDP-10.
  See {{TOPS-10}}, {{ITS}}, {AOS}, {BLT}, {DDT}, {DPB},
  {EXCH}, {HAKMEM}, {JFCL}, {LDB}, {pop}, {push},
  appendix A.

PDP-20: n. The most famous computer that never was.  {PDP-10}
  computers running the {{TOPS-10}} operating system were labeled
  `DECsystem-10' as a way of differentiating them from the PDP-11.
  Later on, those systems running {TOPS-20} were labeled
  `DECSYSTEM-20' (the block capitals being the result of a lawsuit
  brought against DEC by Singer, which once made a computer called
  `system-10'), but contrary to popular lore there was never a
  `PDP-20'; the only difference between a 10 and a 20 was the
  operating system and the color of the paint.  Most (but not all)
  machines sold to run TOPS-10 were painted `Basil Blue', whereas
  most TOPS-20 machines were painted `Chinese Red' (often mistakenly
  called orange).

peek: n.,vt. (and {poke}) The commands in most microcomputer
  BASICs for directly accessing memory contents at an absolute
  address; often extended to mean the corresponding constructs in any
  {HLL} (peek reads memory, poke modifies it).  Much hacking on
  small, non-MMU micros consists of {peek}ing around memory, more
  or less at random, to find the location where the system keeps
  interesting stuff.  Long (and variably accurate) lists of such
  addresses for various computers circulate (see {{interrupt list,
  the}}).  The results of {poke}s at these addresses may be highly
  useful, mildly amusing, useless but neat, or (most likely) total
  {lossage} (see {killer poke}).

pencil and paper: n. An archaic information storage and
  transmission device that works by depositing smears of graphite on
  bleached wood pulp.  More recent developments in paper-based
  technology include improved `write-once' update devices which use
  tiny rolling heads similar to mouse balls to deposit colored
  pigment.  All these devices require an operator skilled at
  so-called `handwriting' technique.  These technologies are
  ubiquitous outside hackerdom, but nearly forgotten inside it.  Most
  hackers had terrible handwriting to begin with, and years of
  keyboarding tend to have encouraged it to degrade further.  Perhaps
  for this reason, hackers deprecate pencil-and-paper technology and
  often resist using it in any but the most trivial contexts.  See
  also appendix B.

peon: n. A person with no special ({root} or {wheel})
  privileges on a computer system.  "I can't create an account on
  *foovax* for you; I'm only a peon there."

percent-S: /per-sent' es'/ [From the code in C's `printf(3)'
  library function used to insert an arbitrary string argument] n. An
  unspecified person or object.  "I was just talking to some
  percent-s in administration."  Compare {random}.

perf: /perf/ n. See {chad} (sense 1).  The term `perfory'
  /per'f*-ree/ is also heard.

perfect programmer syndrome: n. Arrogance; the egotistical
  conviction that one is above normal human error.  Most frequently
  found among programmers of some native ability but relatively
  little experience (especially new graduates; their perceptions may
  be distorted by a history of excellent performance at solving {toy
  problem}s).  "Of course my program is correct, there is no need to
  test it."  "Yes, I can see there may be a problem here, but
  *I'll* never type `rm -r /' while in {root}."

Perl: /perl/ [Practical Extraction and Report Language, a.k.a
  Pathologically Eclectic Rubbish Lister] n. An interpreted language
  developed by Larry Wall ([email protected], author of
  `patch(1)' and `rn(1)') and distributed over USENET.
  Superficially resembles `awk(1)', but is much hairier (see
  {awk}).  UNIX sysadmins, who are almost always incorrigible
  hackers, increasingly consider it one of the {languages of
  choice}.  Perl has been described, in a parody of a famous remark
  about `lex(1)', as the "Swiss-Army chainsaw" of UNIX
  programming.

pessimal: /pes'im-l/ [Latin-based antonym for `optimal'] adj.
  Maximally bad.  "This is a pessimal situation."  Also `pessimize'
  vt. To make as bad as possible.  These words are the obvious
  Latin-based antonyms for `optimal' and `optimize', but for some
  reason they do not appear in most English dictionaries, although
  `pessimize' is listed in the OED.

pessimizing compiler: /pes'*-mi:z`ing k*m-pi:l'r/ [antonym of
  `optimizing compiler'] n. A compiler that produces object code that
  is worse than the straightforward or obvious hand translation.  The
  implication is that the compiler is actually trying to optimize the
  program, but through excessive cleverness is doing the opposite.  A
  few pessimizing compilers have been written on purpose, however, as
  pranks or burlesques.

peta-: /pe't*/ [SI] pref. See {{quantifiers}}.

PETSCII: /pet'skee/ [abbreviation of PET ASCII] n. The variation
  (many would say perversion) of the {{ASCII}} character set used by
  the Commodore Business Machines PET series of personal computers
  and the later Commodore C64, C16, and C128 machines.  The PETSCII
  set used left-arrow and up-arrow (as in old-style ASCII) instead of
  underscore and caret, placed the unshifted alphabet at positions
  65--90, put the shifted alphabet at positions 193--218, and added
  graphics characters.

phase: 1. n. The phase of one's waking-sleeping schedule with
  respect to the standard 24-hour cycle.  This is a useful concept
  among people who often work at night and/or according to no fixed
  schedule.  It is not uncommon to change one's phase by as much as 6
  hours per day on a regular basis.  "What's your phase?"  "I've
  been getting in about 8 P.M. lately, but I'm going to {wrap
  around} to the day schedule by Friday."  A person who is roughly
  12 hours out of phase is sometimes said to be in `night mode'.
  (The term `day mode' is also (but less frequently) used, meaning
  you're working 9 to 5 (or, more likely, 10 to 6).)  The act of
  altering one's cycle is called `changing phase'; `phase
  shifting' has also been recently reported from Caltech.
  2. `change phase the hard way': To stay awake for a very long
  time in order to get into a different phase.  3. `change phase
  the easy way': To stay asleep, etc.  However, some claim that
  either staying awake longer or sleeping longer is easy, and that it
  is *shortening* your day or night that's hard (see {wrap
  around}).  The `jet lag' that afflicts travelers who cross many
  time-zone boundaries may be attributed to two distinct causes: the
  strain of travel per se, and the strain of changing phase.  Hackers
  who suddenly find that they must change phase drastically in a
  short period of time, particularly the hard way, experience
  something very like jet lag without traveling.

phase of the moon: n. Used humorously as a random parameter on which
  something is said to depend.  Sometimes implies unreliability of
  whatever is dependent, or that reliability seems to be dependent on
  conditions nobody has been able to determine.  "This feature
  depends on having the channel open in mumble mode, having the foo
  switch set, and on the phase of the moon."

  True story: Once upon a time there was a bug that really did depend
  on the phase of the moon.  There is a little subroutine that had
  traditionally been used in various programs at MIT to calculate an
  approximation to the moon's true phase.  GLS incorporated this
  routine into a LISP program that, when it wrote out a file, would
  print a timestamp line almost 80 characters long.  Very
  occasionally the first line of the message would be too long and
  would overflow onto the next line, and when the file was later read
  back in the program would {barf}.  The length of the first line
  depended on both the precise date and time and the length of the
  phase specification when the timestamp was printed, and so the bug
  literally depended on the phase of the moon!

  The first paper edition of the Jargon File (Steele-1983) included
  an example of one of the timestamp lines that exhibited this bug, but
  the typesetter `corrected' it.  This has since been described as
  the phase-of-the-moon-bug bug.

phreaking: [from `phone phreak'] n. 1. The art and science of
  cracking the phone network (so as, for example, to make free
  long-distance calls).  2. By extension, security-cracking in any
  other context (especially, but not exclusively, on communications
  networks).

  At one time phreaking was a semi-respectable activity among
  hackers; there was a gentleman's agreement that phreaking as an
  intellectual game and a form of exploration was OK, but serious
  theft of services was taboo.  There was significant crossover
  between the hacker community and the hard-core phone phreaks who
  ran semi-underground networks of their own through such media as
  the legendary `TAP Newsletter'.  This ethos began to break
  down in the mid-1980s as wider dissemination of the techniques put
  them in the hands of less responsible phreaks.  Around the same
  time, changes in the phone network made old-style technical
  ingenuity less effective as a way of hacking it, so phreaking came
  to depend more on overtly criminal acts such as stealing phone-card
  numbers.  The crimes and punishments of gangs like the `414 group'
  turned that game very ugly.  A few old-time hackers still phreak
  casually just to keep their hand in, but most these days have
  hardly even heard of `blue boxes' or any of the other
  paraphernalia of the great phreaks of yore.

pico-: [SI: a quantifier
  meaning * 10^-12]
  pref. Smaller than {nano-}; used in the same rather loose
  connotative way as {nano-} and {micro-}.  This usage is not yet
  common in the way {nano-} and {micro-} are, but should be
  instantly recognizable to any hacker.  See also {{quantifiers}},
  {micro-}.

pig, run like a: v. To run very slowly on given hardware, said of
  software.  Distinct from {hog}.

pilot error: [Sun: from aviation] n. A user's misconfiguration or
  misuse of a piece of software, producing apparently buglike results
  (compare {UBD}).  "Joe Luser reported a bug in sendmail that
  causes it to generate bogus headers."  "That's not a bug, that's
  pilot error.  His `sendmail.cf' is hosed."

ping: [from the TCP/IP acronym `Packet INternet Groper', prob.
  originally contrived to match the submariners' term for a sonar
  pulse] 1. n.  Slang term for a small network message (ICMP ECHO)
  sent by a computer to check for the presence and aliveness of
  another.  Occasionally used as a phone greeting.  See {ACK},
  also {ENQ}.  2. vt. To verify the presence of.  3. vt. To get
  the attention of.  From the UNIX command `ping(1)' that sends
  an ICMP ECHO packet to another host.  4. vt. To send a message to
  all members of a {mailing list} requesting an {ACK} (in order
  to verify that everybody's addresses are reachable).  "We haven't
  heard much of anything from Geoff, but he did respond with an ACK
  both times I pinged jargon-friends."

  The funniest use of `ping' to date was described in January 1991 by
  Steve Hayman on the USENET group comp.sys.next.  He was trying
  to isolate a faulty cable segment on a TCP/IP Ethernet hooked up to
  a NeXT machine, and got tired of having to run back to his console
  after each cabling tweak to see if the ping packets were getting
  through.  So he used the sound-recording feature on the NeXT, then
  wrote a script that repeatedly invoked `ping(8)', listened for
  an echo, and played back the recording on each returned packet.
  Result?  A program that caused the machine to repeat, over and
  over, "Ping ... ping ... ping ..." as long as the
  network was up.  He turned the volume to maximum, ferreted through
  the building with one ear cocked, and found a faulty tee connector
  in no time.

Pink-Shirt Book: `The Peter Norton Programmer's Guide to the IBM
  PC'.  The original cover featured a picture of Peter Norton with a
  silly smirk on his face, wearing a pink shirt.  Perhaps in
  recognition of this usage, the current edition has a different
  picture of Norton wearing a pink shirt.  See also {{book titles}}.

PIP: /pip/ [Peripheral Interchange Program] vt.,obs. To copy; from
  the program PIP on CP/M, RSX-11, RSTS/E, and OS/8 (derived from a
  utility on the PDP-6) that was used for file copying (and in OS/8
  and RT-11 for just about every other file operation you might want
  to do).  It is said that when the program was originated, during the
  development of the PDP-6 in 1963, it was called ATLATL (`Anything,
  Lord, to Anything, Lord').

pistol: [IBM] n. A tool that makes it all too easy for you to
  shoot yourself in the foot.  "UNIX `rm *' makes such a nice
  pistol!"

pizza box: [Sun] n. The largish thin box housing the electronics
  in (especially Sun) desktop workstations, so named because of its
  size and shape and the dimpled pattern that looks like air holes.

  Two meg single-platter removable disk packs used to be called pizzas,
  and the huge drive they were stuck into was referred to as a pizza
  oven.  It's an index of progress that in the old days just the disk
  was pizza-sized, while now the entire computer is.

pizza, ANSI standard: /an'see stan'd*rd peet'z*/ [CMU] Pepperoni
  and mushroom pizza.  Coined allegedly because most pizzas ordered
  by CMU hackers during some period leading up to mid-1990 were of
  that flavor.  See also {rotary debugger}; compare {tea, ISO
  standard cup of}.

plain-ASCII: /playn-as'kee/ Syn. {flat-ASCII}.

plan file: [UNIX] n. On systems that support {finger}, the
  `.plan' file in a user's home directory is displayed when the user
  is fingered.  This feature was originally intended to be used to
  keep potential fingerers apprised of one's location and near-future
  plans, but has been turned almost universally to humorous and
  self-expressive purposes (like a {sig block}).  See {Hacking X
  for Y}.

platinum-iridium: adj. Standard, against which all others of the
  same category are measured.  Usage: silly.  The notion is that one
  of whatever it is has actually been cast in platinum-iridium alloy
  and placed in the vault beside the Standard Kilogram at the
  International Bureau of Weights and Measures near Paris.  (From
  1889 to 1960, the meter was defined to be the distance between two
  scratches in a platinum-iridium bar kept in that vault --- this
  replaced an earlier definition as 10^7 times the distance
  between the North Pole and the Equator along a meridian through
  Paris; unfortunately, this had been based on an inexact value of
  the circumference of the Earth.  From 1960 to 1984 it was defined
  to be 1650763.73 wavelengths of the orange-red line of krypton-86
  propagating in a vacuum.  It is now defined as the length of the
  path traveled by light in a vacuum in the time interval of
  1/299,792,458 of a second.  The kilogram is now the only unit of
  measure officially defined in terms of a unique artifact.)  "This
  garbage-collection algorithm has been tested against the
  platinum-iridium cons cell in Paris."  Compare {golden}.

playpen: [IBM] n. A room where programmers work.  Compare {salt
  mines}.

playte: /playt/ 16 bits, by analogy with {nybble} and {{byte}}.  Usage:
  rare and extremely silly.  See also {dynner} and {crumb}.

plingnet: /pling'net/ n. Syn. {UUCPNET}.  Also see
  {{Commonwealth Hackish}}, which uses `pling' for {bang} (as in
  {bang path}).

plokta: /plok't*/ [Acronym for `Press Lots Of Keys To Abort']
  v.  To press random keys in an attempt to get some response from
  the system.  One might plokta when the abort procedure for a
  program is not known, or when trying to figure out if the system is
  just sluggish or really hung.  Plokta can also be used while trying
  to figure out any unknown key sequence for a particular operation.
  Someone going into `plokta mode' usually places both hands flat
  on the keyboard and presses down, hoping for some useful
  response.

plonk: [USENET: possibly influenced by British slang `plonk' for
  cheap booze] The sound a {newbie} makes as he falls to the bottom
  of a {kill file}.  Used almost exclusively in the {newsgroup}
  talk.bizarre, this term (usually written "*plonk*") is a
  form of public ridicule.

plugh: /ploogh/ [from the {ADVENT} game] v. See {xyzzy}.

plumbing: [UNIX] n. Term used for {shell} code, so called because
  of the prevalence of `pipelines' that feed the output of one
  program to the input of another.  Under UNIX, user utilities can
  often be implemented or at least prototyped by a suitable
  collection of pipelines and temp-file grinding encapsulated in a
  shell script; this is much less effort than writing C every time,
  and the capability is considered one of UNIX's major winning
  features.  Esp. used in the construction `hairy plumbing' (see
  {hairy}).  "You can kluge together a basic spell-checker out of
  `sort(1)', `comm(1)', and `tr(1)' with a little
  plumbing." See also {tee}.

PM: /P-M/ 1. v. (from `preventive maintenance') To bring
  down a machine for inspection or test purposes; see {scratch
  monkey}.  2. n. Abbrev. for `Presentation Manager', an
  {elephantine} OS/2 graphical user interface.  See also
  {provocative maintenance}.

pnambic: /p*-nam'bik/ [Acronym from the scene in the film
  version of `The Wizard of Oz' in which true nature of the
  wizard is first discovered: "Pay no attention to the man behind
  the curtain."]  1. A stage of development of a process or function
  that, owing to incomplete implementation or to the complexity of
  the system, requires human interaction to simulate or replace some
  or all of the actions, inputs, or outputs of the process or
  function.  2. Of or pertaining to a process or function whose
  apparent operations are wholly or partially falsified.  3. Requiring
  {prestidigitization}.

  The ultimate pnambic product was "Dan Bricklin's Demo", a program
  which supported flashy user-interface design prototyping.  There is
  a related maxim among hackers: "Any sufficiently advanced
  technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo."  See
  {magic}, sense 1, for illumination of this point.

pod: [allegedly from acronym POD for `Prince Of Darkness'] n. A
  Diablo 630 (or, latterly, any letter-quality impact printer).  From
  the DEC-10 PODTYPE program used to feed formatted text to it.
  See also {P.O.D.}

poke: n.,vt. See {peek}.

poll: v.,n. 1. [techspeak] The action of checking the status of an
  input line, sensor, or memory location to see if a particular
  external event has been registered.  2. To repeatedly call or check
  with someone: "I keep polling him, but he's not answering his
  phone; he must be swapped out."  3. To ask.  "Lunch?  I poll for
  a takeout order daily."

polygon pusher: n. A chip designer who spends most of his or her time at
  the physical layout level (which requires drawing *lots* of
  multi-colored polygons).  Also `rectangle slinger'.

POM: /P-O-M/ n. Common acronym for {phase of the moon}.  Usage:
  usually in the phrase `POM-dependent', which means {flaky}.

pop: [from the operation that removes the top of a stack, and the
  fact that procedure return addresses are saved on the stack] (also
  capitalized `POP' /pop/) 1. vt. To remove something from a
  {stack} or {pdl}.  If a person says he/she has popped
  something from his stack, that means he/she has finally finished
  working on it and can now remove it from the list of things hanging
  overhead.  2. When a discussion gets to too deep a level of detail
  so that the main point of the discussion is being lost, someone
  will shout "Pop!", meaning "Get back up to a higher level!"
  The shout is frequently accompanied by an upthrust arm with a
  finger pointing to the ceiling.

POPJ: /pop'J/ [from a {PDP-10} return-from-subroutine
  instruction] n.,v. To return from a digression.  By verb doubling,
  "Popj, popj" means roughly "Now let's see, where were we?"
  See {RTI}.

posing: n. On a {MUD}, the use of `:' or an equivalent
  command to announce to other players that one is taking a certain
  physical action that has no effect on the game (it may, however,
  serve as a social signal or propaganda device that induces other
  people to take game actions).  For example, if one's character name
  is Firechild, one might type `: looks delighted at the idea and
  begins hacking on the nearest terminal' to broadcast a message that
  says "Firechild looks delighted at the idea and begins hacking on
  the nearest terminal".  See {RL}.

post: v. To send a message to a {mailing list} or {newsgroup}.
  Distinguished in context from `mail'; one might ask, for
  example: "Are you going to post the patch or mail it to known
  users?"

posting: n. Noun corresp. to v. {post} (but note that
  {post} can be nouned).  Distinguished from a `letter' or ordinary
  {email} message by the fact that it is broadcast rather than
  point-to-point.  It is not clear whether messages sent to a small
  mailing list are postings or email; perhaps the best dividing line
  is that if you don't know the names of all the potential
  recipients, it is a posting.

postmaster: n. The email contact and maintenance person at a site
  connected to the Internet or UUCPNET.  Often, but not always, the
  same as the {admin}.  It is conventional for each machine to have
  a `postmaster' address that is aliased to this person.

pound on: vt.  Syn. {bang on}.

power cycle: vt. (also, `cycle power' or just `cycle') To
  power off a machine and then power it on immediately, with the
  intention of clearing some kind of {hung} or {gronk}ed state.
  Syn. {120 reset}; see also {Big Red Switch}.  Compare
  {Vulcan nerve pinch}, {bounce}, and {boot}, and see the
  AI Koan in appendix A about Tom Knight and the novice.

PPN: /P-P-N/, /pip'n/ [from `Project-Programmer Number'] n. A
  user-ID under {{TOPS-10}} and its various mutant progeny at SAIL,
  BBN, CompuServe, and elsewhere.  Old-time hackers from the PDP-10
  era sometimes use this to refer to user IDs on other systems as
  well.

precedence lossage: /pre's*-dens los'*j/ [C programmers] n. Coding
  error in an expression due to unexpected grouping of arithmetic or
  logical operators by the compiler.  Used esp. of certain common
  coding errors in C due to the nonintuitively low precedence levels
  of `&', `|', `^', `<<', and `>>' (for this
  reason, experienced C programmers deliberately forget the
  language's {baroque} precedence hierarchy and parenthesize
  defensively).  Can always be avoided by suitable use of
  parentheses.  {LISP} fans enjoy pointing out that this can't
  happen in *their* favorite language, which eschews precedence
  entirely, requiring one to use explicit parentheses everywhere.
  See {aliasing bug}, {memory leak}, {smash the stack},
  {fandango on core}, {overrun screw}.

prepend: /pree`pend'/ [by analogy with `append'] vt. To
  prefix.  As with `append' (but not `prefix' or `suffix' as a
  verb), the direct object is always the thing being added and not
  the original word (or character string, or whatever).  "If you
  prepend a semicolon to the line, the translation routine will pass
  it through unaltered."

prestidigitization: /pres`t*-di`j*-ti:-zay'sh*n/ n. 1. The act
  of putting something into digital notation via sleight of hand.
  2. Data entry through legerdemain.

pretty pictures: n. [scientific computation] The next step up from
  {numbers}.  Interesting graphical output from a program that may
  not have any sensible relationship to the system the program is
  intended to model.  Good for showing to {management}.

prettyprint: /prit'ee-print/ (alt. `pretty-print') v. 1. To
  generate `pretty' human-readable output from a {hairy} internal
  representation; esp. used for the process of {grind}ing (sense 2)
  LISP code.  2. To format in some particularly slick and
  nontrivial way.

pretzel key: [Mac users] n. See {command key}.

prime time: [from TV programming] n. Normal high-usage hours on a
  timesharing system; the day shift.  Avoidance of prime time is a
  major reason for {night mode} hacking.

priority interrupt: [from the hardware term] n. Describes any
  stimulus compelling enough to yank one right out of {hack mode}.
  Classically used to describe being dragged away by an {SO} for
  immediate sex, but may also refer to more mundane interruptions
  such as a fire alarm going off in the near vicinity.  Also called
  an {NMI} (non-maskable interrupt), especially in PC-land.

profile: n. 1. A control file for a program, esp. a text file
  automatically read from each user's home directory and intended to
  be easily modified by the user in order to customize the program's
  behavior.  Used to avoid {hardcoded} choices.  2. [techspeak] A
  report on the amounts of time spent in each routine of a program,
  used to find and {tune} away the {hot spot}s in it.  This sense
  is often verbed.  Some profiling modes report units other than time
  (such as call counts) and/or report at granularities other than
  per-routine, but the idea is similar.

proglet: /prog'let/ [UK] n. A short extempore program written
  to meet an immediate, transient need.  Often written in BASIC,
  rarely more than a dozen lines long, and contains no subroutines.
  The largest amount of code that can be written off the top of one's
  head, that does not need any editing, and that runs correctly the
  first time (this amount varies significantly according to the
  language one is using).  Compare {toy program}, {noddy},
  {one-liner wars}.

program: n. 1. A magic spell cast over a computer allowing it to
  turn one's input into error messages.  2. An exercise in
  experimental epistemology.  3. A form of art, ostensibly intended
  for the instruction of computers, which is nevertheless almost
  inevitably a failure if other programmers can't understand it.

Programmer's Cheer: "Shift to the left!  Shift to the right!  Pop
  up, push down!  Byte!  Byte!  Byte!"  A joke so old it has hair on
  it.

programming: n. 1. The art of debugging a blank sheet of paper (or,
  in these days of on-line editing, the art of debugging an empty
  file).  2. n. A pastime similar to banging one's head against a
  wall, but with fewer opportunities for reward.  3. n. The most fun
  you can have with your clothes on (although clothes are not
  mandatory).

propeller head: n. Used by hackers, this is syn. with {computer
  geek}.  Non-hackers sometimes use it to describe all techies.
  Prob. derives from SF fandom's tradition (originally invented by
  old-time fan Ray Faraday Nelson) of propeller beanies as fannish
  insignia (though nobody actually wears them except as a joke).

propeller key: [Mac users] n. See {command key}.

proprietary: adj. 1. In {marketroid}-speak, superior; implies a
  product imbued with exclusive magic by the unmatched brilliance of
  the company's hardware or software designers.  2. In the language
  of hackers and users, inferior; implies a product not conforming to
  open-systems standards, and thus one that puts the customer at the
  mercy of a vendor able to gouge freely on service and upgrade
  charges after the initial sale has locked the customer in (that's
  assuming it wasn't too expensive in the first place).

protocol: n. As used by hackers, this never refers to niceties
  about the proper form for addressing letters to the Papal Nuncio or
  the order in which one should use the forks in a Russian-style
  place setting; hackers don't care about such things.  It is used
  instead to describe any set of rules that allow different machines
  or pieces of software to coordinate with each other without
  ambiguity.  So, for example, it does include niceties about the
  proper form for addressing packets on a network or the order in
  which one should use the forks in the Dining Philosophers Problem.
  It implies that there is some common message format and an accepted set
  of primitives or commands that all parties involved understand, and
  that transactions among them follow predictable logical sequences.
  See also {handshaking}, {do protocol}.

provocative maintenance: [common ironic mutation of `preventive
  maintenance'] n. Actions performed upon a machine at regularly
  scheduled intervals to ensure that the system remains in a usable
  state.  So called because it is all too often performed by a
  {field servoid} who doesn't know what he is doing; this results
  in the machine's remaining in an *un*usable state for an
  indeterminate amount of time.  See also {scratch monkey}.

prowler: [UNIX] n. A {daemon} that is run periodically (typically
  once a week) to seek out and erase {core} files, truncate
  administrative logfiles, nuke `lost+found' directories, and
  otherwise clean up the {cruft} that tends to pile up in the
  corners of a file system.  See also {GFR}, {reaper},
  {skulker}.

pseudo: /soo'doh/ [USENET: truncation of `pseudonym'] n. 1. An
  electronic-mail or {USENET} persona adopted by a human for
  amusement value or as a means of avoiding negative repercussions of
  one's net.behavior; a `nom de USENET', often associated with
  forged postings designed to conceal message origins.  Perhaps the
  best-known and funniest hoax of this type is {BIFF}.
  2. Notionally, a {flamage}-generating AI program simulating a
  USENET user.  Many flamers have been accused of actually being such
  entities, despite the fact that no AI program of the required
  sophistication yet exists.  However, in 1989 there was a famous
  series of forged postings that used a phrase-frequency-based
  travesty generator to simulate the styles of several well-known
  flamers; it was based on large samples of their back postings
  (compare {Dissociated Press}).  A significant number of people
  were fooled by the forgeries, and the debate over their
  authenticity was settled only when the perpetrator came forward to
  publicly admit the hoax.

pseudoprime: n. A backgammon prime (six consecutive occupied
  points) with one point missing.  This term is an esoteric pun
  derived from a mathematical method that, rather than determining
  precisely whether a number is prime (has no divisors), uses a
  statistical technique to decide whether the number is `probably'
  prime.  A number that passes this test is called a pseudoprime.
  The hacker backgammon usage stems from the idea that a pseudoprime
  is almost as good as a prime: it does the job of a prime until
  proven otherwise, and that probably won't happen.

pseudosuit: /soo'doh-s[y]oot`/ n. A {suit} wannabee; a hacker
  who has decided that he wants to be in management or administration
  and begins wearing ties, sport coats, and (shudder!) suits
  voluntarily.  It's his funeral.  See also {lobotomy}.

psychedelicware: /si:`k*-del'-ik-weir/ [UK] n. Syn.
  {display hack}.  See also {smoking clover}.

psyton: /si:'ton/ [TMRC] n. The elementary particle carrying the
  sinister force.  The probability of a process losing is
  proportional to the number of psytons falling on it.  Psytons are
  generated by observers, which is why demos are more likely to fail
  when lots of people are watching.  [This term appears to have been
  largely superseded by {bogon}; see also {quantum bogodynamics}.
  --- ESR]

pubic directory: [NYU] (also `pube directory' /pyoob'
  d*-rek't*-ree/) n. The `pub' (public) directory on a machine that
  allows {FTP} access.  So called because it is the default
  location for {SEX} (sense 1).  "I'll have the source in the
  pube directory by Friday."

puff: vt. To decompress data that has been crunched by Huffman
  coding.  At least one widely distributed Huffman decoder program
  was actually *named* `PUFF', but these days it is usually
  packaged with the encoder.  Oppose {huff}.

punched card:: alt. `punch card' [techspeak] n.obs. The signature
  medium of computing's {Stone Age}, now obsolescent outside of
  some IBM shops.  The punched card actually predated computers
  considerably, originating in 1801 as a control device for
  mechanical looms.  The version patented by Hollerith and used with
  mechanical tabulating machines in the 1890 U.S. Census was a piece
  of cardboard about 90 mm by 215 mm, designed to fit exactly in the
  currency trays used for that era's larger dollar bills.

  IBM (which originated as a tabulating-machine manufacturer) married
  the punched card to computers, encoding binary information as
  patterns of small rectangular holes; one character per column,
  80 columns per card.  Other coding schemes, sizes of card, and
  hole shapes were tried at various times.

  The 80-column width of most character terminals is a legacy of the
  IBM punched card; so is the size of the quick-reference cards
  distributed with many varieties of computers even today.  See
  {chad}, {chad box}, {eighty-column mind}, {green card},
  {dusty deck}, {lace card}, {card walloper}.

punt: [from the punch line of an old joke referring to American
  football: "Drop back 15 yards and punt!"] v. 1. To give up,
  typically without any intention of retrying.  "Let's punt the
  movie tonight."  "I was going to hack all night to get this
  feature in, but I decided to punt" may mean that you've decided
  not to stay up all night, and may also mean you're not ever even
  going to put in the feature.  2. More specifically, to give up on
  figuring out what the {Right Thing} is and resort to an
  inefficient hack.  3. A design decision to defer solving a
  problem, typically because one cannot define what is desirable
  sufficiently well to frame an algorithmic solution.  "No way to
  know what the right form to dump the graph in is --- we'll punt
  that for now."  4. To hand a tricky implementation problem off
  to some other section of the design.  "It's too hard to get the
  compiler to do that; let's punt to the runtime system."

Purple Book: n. The `System V Interface Definition'.  The covers
  of the first editions were an amazingly nauseating shade of
  off-lavender.  See also {{book titles}}.

push: [from the operation that puts the current information on a
  stack, and the fact that procedure return addresses are saved on
  a stack] Also PUSH /push/ or PUSHJ /push'J/ (the latter based
  on the PDP-10 procedure call instruction).  1. To put something
  onto a {stack} or {pdl}.  If one says that something has been
  pushed onto one's stack, it means that the Damoclean list of things
  hanging over ones's head has grown longer and heavier yet.  This may
  also imply that one will deal with it *before* other pending
  items; otherwise one might say that the thing was `added to my queue'.
  2. vi. To enter upon a digression, to save the current discussion
  for later.  Antonym of {pop}; see also {stack}, {pdl}.

= Q =
=====

quad: n. 1. Two bits; syn. for {quarter}, {crumb},
  {tayste}.  2. A four-pack of anything (compare {hex}, sense 2).
  3. The rectangle or box glyph used in the APL language for various
  arcane purposes mostly related to I/O.  Former Ivy-Leaguers and
  Oxbridge types are said to associate it with nostalgic memories of
  dear old University.

quadruple bucky: n., obs. 1. On an MIT {space-cadet keyboard},
  use of all four of the shifting keys (control, meta, hyper, and
  super) while typing a character key.  2. On a Stanford or MIT
  keyboard in {raw mode}, use of four shift keys while typing a
  fifth character, where the four shift keys are the control and meta
  keys on *both* sides of the keyboard.  This was very difficult
  to do!  One accepted technique was to press the left-control and
  left-meta keys with your left hand, the right-control and
  right-meta keys with your right hand, and the fifth key with your
  nose.

  Quadruple-bucky combinations were very seldom used in practice,
  because when one invented a new command one usually assigned it to
  some character that was easier to type.  If you want to imply that
  a program has ridiculously many commands or features, you can say
  something like: "Oh, the command that makes it spin the tapes while
  whistling Beethoven's Fifth Symphony is quadruple-bucky-cokebottle."
  See {double bucky}, {bucky bits}, {cokebottle}.

quantifiers:: In techspeak and jargon, the standard metric
  prefixes used in the SI (Syst`eme International) conventions for
  scientific measurement have dual uses.  With units of time or
  things that come in powers of 10, such as money, they retain their
  usual meanings of multiplication by powers of 1000 = 10^3.
  But when used with bytes or other things that naturally come in
  powers of 2, they usually denote multiplication by powers of
  1024 = 2^{10}.  Here are the magnifying prefixes in jargon
  use:

    prefix  decimal  binary
    kilo-   1000^1   1024^1 = 2^10 = 1,024
    mega-   1000^2   1024^2 = 2^20 = 1,048,576
    giga-   1000^3   1024^3 = 2^30 = 1,073,741,824
    tera-   1000^4   1024^4 = 2^40 = 1,099,511,627,776
    peta-   1000^5   1024^5 = 2^50 = 1,125,899,906,842,624
    exa-    1000^6   1024^6 = 2^60 = 1,152,921,504,606,846,976

  Here are the fractional prefixes:

    *prefix  decimal     jargon usage*
    milli-  1000^-1     (seldom used in jargon)
    micro-  1000^-2     small or human-scale (see {micro-})
    nano-   1000^-3     even smaller (see {nano-})
    pico-   1000^-4     even smaller yet (see {pico-})
    femto-  1000^-5     (not used in jargon---yet)
    atto-   1000^-6     (not used in jargon---yet)

  The binary peta- and exa- loadings are not in common use---yet,
  and the prefix milli-, denoting multiplication by 1000^{-1},
  has always been rare (there is, however, a standard joke about the
  `millihelen' --- notionally, the amount of beauty required to
  launch one ship).  See the entries on {micro-}, {pico-}, and
  {nano-} for more information on connotative jargon use of these
  terms.  `Femto' and `atto' (which, interestingly, derive not
  from Greek but from Danish) have not yet acquired jargon loadings,
  though it is easy to predict what those will be once computing
  technology enters the required realms of magnitude (however, see
  {attoparsec}).

  There are, of course, some standard unit prefixes for powers of
  10.  In the following table, the `prefix' column is the
  international standard suffix for the appropriate power of ten; the
  `binary' column lists jargon abbreviations and words for the
  corresponding power of 2.  The B-suffixed forms are commonly used
  for byte quantities; the words `meg' and `gig' are nouns which may
  (but do not always) pluralize with `s'.

    prefix   decimal   binary       pronunciation
    kilo-       k      K, KB,       /kay/
    mega-       M      M, MB, meg   /meg/
    giga-       G      G, GB, gig   /gig/,/jig/

  Confusingly, hackers often use K as though it were a suffix or
  numeric multiplier rather than a prefix; thus "2K dollars".  This
  is also true (though less commonly) of G and M.

  Note that the formal SI metric prefix for 1000 is `k'; some use
  this strictly, reserving `K' for multiplication by 1024 (KB is
  `kilobytes').

  K, M, and G used alone refer to quantities of bytes; thus, 64G is
  64 gigabytes and `a K' is a kilobyte (compare mainstream use of `a G'
  as short for `a grand', that is, $1000).  Whether one pronounces
  `gig' with hard or soft `g' depends on what one thinks the proper
  pronunciation of `giga-' is.

  Confusing 1000 and 1024 (or other powers of 2 and 10 close in
  magnitude) --- for example, describing a memory in units of
  500K or 524K instead of 512K --- is a sure sign of the
  {marketroid}.

quantum bogodynamics: /kwon'tm boh`goh-di:-nam'iks/ n. A theory
  that characterizes the universe in terms of bogon sources (such as
  politicians, used-car salesmen, TV evangelists, and {suit}s in
  general), bogon sinks (such as taxpayers and computers), and
  bogosity potential fields.  Bogon absorption, of course, causes
  human beings to behave mindlessly and machines to fail (and may
  also cause both to emit secondary bogons); however, the precise
  mechanics of the bogon-computron interaction are not yet understood
  and remain to be elucidated.  Quantum bogodynamics is most often
  invoked to explain the sharp increase in hardware and software
  failures in the presence of suits; the latter emit bogons, which
  the former absorb.  See {bogon}, {computron}, {suit},
  {psyton}.

quarter: n. Two bits.  This in turn comes from the `pieces of
  eight' famed in pirate movies --- Spanish gold pieces that could be
  broken into eight pie-slice-shaped `bits' to make change.  Early
  in American history the Spanish coin was considered equal to a
  dollar, so each of these `bits' was considered worth 12.5 cents.
  Syn.  {tayste}, {crumb}, {quad}.  Usage: rare.  See also
  {nickle}, {nybble}, {{byte}}, {dynner}.

ques: /kwes/ 1. n. The question mark character (`?', ASCII
  0111111).  2. interj.  What?  Also frequently verb-doubled as
  "Ques ques?"  See {wall}.

quick-and-dirty: adj. Describes a {crock} put together under time
  or user pressure.  Used esp. when you want to convey that you think
  the fast way might lead to trouble further down the road.  "I can
  have a quick-and-dirty fix in place tonight, but I'll have to
  rewrite the whole module to solve the underlying design problem."
  See also {kluge}.

quote chapter and verse: [by analogy with the mainstream phrase] v.
  To reproduce a relevant excerpt from an appropriate {bible}.
  "I don't care if `rn' gets it wrong; `Followup-To: poster' is
  explicitly permitted by RFC-1036.  I'll quote chapter and
  verse if you don't believe me."

quotient: n. See {coefficient}.

quux: /kwuhks/ Mythically, from the Latin semi-deponent verb
  quuxo, quuxare, quuxandum iri; noun form variously `quux' (plural
  `quuces', anglicized to `quuxes') and `quuxu' (genitive
  plural is `quuxuum', for four u-letters out of seven in all,
  using up all the `u' letters in Scrabble).]  1. Originally, a
  metasyntactic variable like {foo} and {foobar}.  Invented by
  Guy Steele for precisely this purpose when he was young and na"ive
  and not yet interacting with the real computing community.  Many
  people invent such words; this one seems simply to have been lucky
  enough to have spread a little.  In an eloquent display of poetic
  justice, it has returned to the originator in the form of a
  nickname.  2. interj. See {foo}; however, denotes very little
  disgust, and is uttered mostly for the sake of the sound of it.
  3. Guy Steele in his persona as `The Great Quux', which is somewhat
  infamous for light verse and for the `Crunchly' cartoons.  4. In
  some circles, quux is used as a punning opposite of `crux'.
  "Ah, that's the quux of the matter!"  implies that the point is
  *not* crucial (compare {tip of the ice-cube}).  5. quuxy:
  adj. Of or pertaining to a quux.

qux: /kwuhks/ The fourth of the standard metasyntactic
  variables, after {baz} and before the quu(u...)x series.
  See {foo}, {bar}, {baz}, {quux}.  This appears to be a
  recent mutation from {quux}, and  many versions of the
  standard series just run {foo}, {bar}, {baz}, {quux},
  ....

QWERTY: /kwer'tee/ [from the keycaps at the upper left] adj.
  Pertaining to a standard English-language typewriter keyboard
  (sometimes called the Sholes keyboard after its inventor), as
  opposed to Dvorak or foreign-language layouts or a {space-cadet
  keyboard} or APL keyboard.

  Historical note: The QWERTY layout is a fine example of a {fossil}.
  It is sometimes said that it was designed to slow down the typist,
  but this is wrong; it was designed to allow *faster* typing
  --- under a constraint now long obsolete.  In early typewriters,
  fast typing using nearby type-bars jammed the mechanism.  So Sholes
  fiddled the layout to separate the letters of many common digraphs
  (he did a far from perfect job, though; `th', `tr', `ed', and `er',
  for example, each use two nearby keys).  Also, putting the letters
  of `typewriter' on one line allowed it to be typed with particular
  speed and accuracy for {demo}s.  The jamming problem was
  essentially solved soon afterward by a suitable use of springs, but
  the keyboard layout lives on.

= R =
=====

rain dance: n. 1. Any ceremonial action taken to correct a hardware
  problem, with the expectation that nothing will be accomplished.
  This especially applies to reseating printed circuit boards,
  reconnecting cables, etc.  "I can't boot up the machine.  We'll
  have to wait for Greg to do his rain dance."  2. Any arcane
  sequence of actions performed with computers or software in order
  to achieve some goal; the term is usually restricted to rituals
  that include both an {incantation} or two and physical activity
  or motion.  Compare {magic}, {voodoo programming}, {black
  art}.

random: adj. 1. Unpredictable (closest to mathematical
  definition); weird.  "The system's been behaving pretty
  randomly."  2. Assorted; undistinguished.  "Who was at the
  conference?"  "Just a bunch of random business types."
  3. (pejorative) Frivolous; unproductive; undirected.  "He's just a
  random loser."  4. Incoherent or inelegant; poorly chosen; not
  well organized.  "The program has a random set of misfeatures."
  "That's a random name for that function."  "Well, all the names
  were chosen pretty randomly."  5. In no particular order, though
  deterministic.  "The I/O channels are in a pool, and when a file
  is opened one is chosen randomly."  6. Arbitrary.  "It generates
  a random name for the scratch file."  7. Gratuitously wrong, i.e.,
  poorly done and for no good apparent reason.  For example, a
  program that handles file name defaulting in a particularly useless
  way, or an assembler routine that could easily have been coded
  using only three registers, but redundantly uses seven for values with
  non-overlapping lifetimes, so that no one else can invoke it
  without first saving four extra registers.  What {randomness}!
  8. n. A random hacker; used particularly of high-school students
  who soak up computer time and generally get in the way.  9. n.
  Anyone who is not a hacker (or, sometimes, anyone not known to the
  hacker speaking); the noun form of sense 2.  "I went to the talk,
  but the audience was full of randoms asking bogus questions".
  10. n. (occasional MIT usage) One who lives at Random Hall.  See
  also {J. Random}, {some random X}.

random numbers:: n. When one wishes to specify a large but random
  number of things, and the context is inappropriate for {N}, certain
  numbers are preferred by hacker tradition (that is, easily
  recognized as placeholders).  These include the following:

    17
         Long described at MIT as `the least random number'; see 23.
    23
         Sacred number of Eris, Goddess of Discord (along with 17 and 5).
    42
         The Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and
         Everything. (Note that this answer is completely fortuitous. `:-)')
    69
         From the sexual act.  This one was favored in MIT's ITS culture.
    105
         69 hex = 105 decimal, and 69 decimal = 105 octal.
    666
         The Number of the Beast.

  For further enlightenment, consult the `Principia Discordia',
  `The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy', `The Joy of Sex',
  and the Christian Bible (Revelation 13:8).  See also
  {Discordianism} or consult your pineal gland.

  One common rhetorical maneuver uses any of the canonical random
  numbers as placeholders for variables.  "The max function takes
  42 arguments, for arbitrary values of 42." "There are 69 ways
  to leave your lover, for 69 = 50."  This is especially likely when
  the speaker has uttered a random number and realizes that it was
  not recognized as such, but even `non-random' numbers are
  occasionally used in this fashion.  A related joke is that pi
  equals 3 --- for small values of pi and large values of 3.

randomness: n. An inexplicable misfeature; gratuitous inelegance.
  Also, a {hack} or {crock} that depends on a complex
  combination of coincidences (or, possibly, the combination upon
  which the crock depends for its accidental failure to malfunction).
  "This hack can output characters 40--57 by putting the character
  in the four-bit accumulator field of an XCT and then extracting six bits
  --- the low 2 bits of the XCT opcode are the right thing." "What
  randomness!"

rape: vt. 1. To {screw} someone or something, violently; in
  particular, to destroy a program or information irrecoverably.
  Often used in describing file-system damage.  "So-and-so was
  running a program that did absolute disk I/O and ended up raping
  the master directory."  2. To strip a piece of hardware for parts.

rare mode: [UNIX] adj. CBREAK mode (character-by-character with
  interrupts enabled).  Distinguished from {raw mode} and `cooked
  mode'; the phrase "a sort of half-cooked (rare?) mode" is used
  in the V7/BSD manuals to describe the mode.  Usage: rare.

raster blaster: n. [Cambridge] Specialized hardware for
  {bitblt} operations (a {blitter}).  Allegedly inspired by
  `Rasta Blasta', British slang for the sort of portable stereo
  Americans call a `boom box' or `ghetto blaster'.

raster burn: n. Eyestrain brought on by too many hours of looking at
  low-res, poorly tuned, or glare-ridden monitors, esp. graphics
  monitors.  See {terminal illness}.

rat belt: n. A cable tie, esp. the sawtoothed, self-locking plastic
  kind that you can remove only by cutting (as opposed to a random
  twist of wire or a twist tie or one of those humongous metal clip
  frobs).  Small cable ties are `mouse belts'.

rave: [WPI] vi. 1. To persist in discussing a specific subject.
  2. To speak authoritatively on a subject about which one knows
  very little.  3. To complain to a person who is not in a position
  to correct the difficulty.  4. To purposely annoy another person
  verbally.  5. To evangelize.  See {flame}.  6. Also used to
  describe a less negative form of blather, such as friendly
  bullshitting.  `Rave' differs slightly from {flame} in that
  `rave' implies that it is the persistence or obliviousness of the
  person speaking that is annoying, while {flame} implies somewhat
  more strongly that the tone is offensive as well.

rave on!: imp. Sarcastic invitation to continue a {rave}, often by
  someone who wishes the raver would get a clue but realizes this is
  unlikely.

ravs: /ravz/, also `Chinese ravs' n. Jiao-zi (steamed or
  boiled) or Guo-tie (pan-fried).  A Chinese appetizer, known
  variously in the plural as dumplings, pot stickers (the literal
  translation of guo-tie), and (around Boston) `Peking Ravioli'.  The
  term `rav' is short for `ravioli', which among hackers always
  means the Chinese kind rather than the Italian kind.  Both consist
  of a filling in a pasta shell, but the Chinese kind includes no
  cheese, uses a thinner pasta, has a pork-vegetable filling (good
  ones include Chinese chives), and is cooked differently, either by
  steaming or frying.  A rav or dumpling can be cooked any way, but a
  potsticker is always the fried kind (so called because it sticks to
  the frying pot and has to be scraped off).  "Let's get
  hot-and-sour soup and three orders of ravs."  See also
  {{oriental food}}.

raw mode: n. A mode that allows a program to transfer bits directly
  to or from an I/O device without any processing, abstraction, or
  interpretation by the operating system.  Compare {rare}.  This is
  techspeak under UNIX, jargon elsewhere.

rc file: /R-C fi:l/ [UNIX: from the startup script
  `/etc/rc', but this is commonly believed to have been named
  after older scripts to `run commands'] n. Script file containing
  startup instructions for an application program (or an entire
  operating system), usually a text file containing commands of the
  sort that might have been invoked manually once the system was
  running but are to be executed automatically each time the system
  starts up.  See also {dot file}.

RE: /R-E/ n. Common spoken and written shorthand for {regexp}.

read-only user: n. Describes a {luser} who uses computers almost
  exclusively for reading USENET, bulletin boards, and/or email,
  rather than writing code or purveying useful information.  See
  {twink}, {terminal junkie}, {lurker}.

README file: n. By convention, the top-level directory of a UNIX
  source distribution always contains a file named `README' (or
  READ.ME, or rarely ReadMe or some other variant), which is a
  hacker's-eye introduction containing a pointer to more detailed
  documentation, credits, miscellaneous revision history notes, etc.
  When asked, hackers invariably relate this to the famous scene in
  Lewis Carroll's `Alice's Adventures In Wonderland' in which
  Alice confronts magic munchies labeled "Eat Me" and "Drink
  Me".

real estate: n. May be used for any critical resource measured in
  units of area.  Most frequently used of `chip real estate', the
  area available for logic on the surface of an integrated circuit
  (see also {nanoacre}).  May also be used of floor space in a
  {dinosaur pen}, or even space on a crowded desktop (whether
  physical or electronic).

real hack: n. A {crock}.  This is sometimes used affectionately;
  see {hack}.

real operating system: n. The sort the speaker is used to.  People
  from the academic community are likely to issue comments like
  "System V?  Why don't you use a *real* operating system?",
  people from the commercial/industrial UNIX sector are known to
  complain "BSD?  Why don't you use a *real* operating
  system?", and people from IBM object "UNIX?  Why don't
  you use a *real* operating system?"  See {holy wars},
  {religious issues}, {proprietary}, {Get a real computer!}

real programmer: [indirectly, from the book `Real Men Don't
  Eat Quiche'] n. A particular sub-variety of hacker: one possessed
  of a flippant attitude toward complexity that is arrogant even
  when justified by experience.  The archetypal `real programmer'
  likes to program on the {bare metal} and is very good at same,
  remembers the binary opcodes for every machine he has ever
  programmed, thinks that HLLs are sissy, and uses a debugger to edit
  his code because full-screen editors are for wimps.  Real
  Programmers aren't satisfied with code that hasn't been {bum}med
  into a state of {tense}ness just short of rupture.  Real
  Programmers never use comments or write documentation: "If it was
  hard to write", says the Real Programmer, "it should be hard to
  understand."  Real Programmers can make machines do things that
  were never in their spec sheets; in fact, they are seldom really
  happy unless doing so.  A Real Programmer's code can awe with its
  fiendish brilliance, even as its crockishness appalls.  Real
  Programmers live on junk food and coffee, hang line-printer art on
  their walls, and terrify the crap out of other programmers ---
  because someday, somebody else might have to try to understand
  their code in order to change it.  Their successors generally
  consider it a {Good Thing} that there aren't many Real
  Programmers around any more.  For a famous (and somewhat more
  positive) portrait of a Real Programmer, see "The Story of
  Mel" in appendix A.

Real Soon Now: [orig. from SF's fanzine community, popularized by
  Jerry Pournelle's column in `BYTE'] adv. 1. Supposed to be available
  (or fixed, or cheap, or whatever) real soon now according to
  somebody, but the speaker is quite skeptical.  2. When one's
  gods, fates, or other time commitments permit one to get to it (in other
  words, don't hold your breath).  Often abbreviated RSN.

real time: 1. [techspeak] adj. Describes an application which requires a
  program to respond to stimuli within some small upper limit of
  response time (typically milli- or microseconds).  Process control
  at a chemical plant is the classic example.  Such applications
  often require special operating systems (because everything else
  must take a back seat to response time) and speed-tuned hardware.
  2. adv. In jargon, refers to doing something while people are watching
  or waiting.  "I asked her how to find the calling procedure's
  program counter on the stack and she came up with an algorithm in
  real time."

real user: n. 1. A commercial user.  One who is paying *real*
  money for his computer usage.  2. A non-hacker.  Someone using the
  system for an explicit purpose (a research project, a course, etc.)
  other than pure exploration.  See {user}.  Hackers who are also
  students may also be real users.  "I need this fixed so I can do a
  problem set.  I'm not complaining out of randomness, but as a real
  user."  See also {luser}.

Real World: n. 1. Those institutions at which `programming' may
  be used in the same sentence as `FORTRAN', `{COBOL}',
  `RPG', `{IBM}', `DBASE', etc.  Places where programs do such
  commercially necessary but intellectually uninspiring things as
  generating payroll checks and invoices.  2. The location of
  non-programmers and activities not related to programming.  3. A
  bizarre dimension in which the standard dress is shirt and tie and
  in which a person's working hours are defined as 9 to 5 (see
  {code grinder}).  4. Anywhere outside a university.  "Poor
  fellow, he's left MIT and gone into the Real World."  Used
  pejoratively by those not in residence there.  In conversation,
  talking of someone who has entered the Real World is not unlike
  speaking of a deceased person.  See also {fear and loathing},
  {mundane}, and {uninteresting}.

reality check: n. 1. The simplest kind of test of software or
  hardware; doing the equivalent of asking it what 2 + 2 is
  and seeing if you get 4.  The software equivalent of a
  {smoke test}.  2. The act of letting a {real user} try out
  prototype software.  Compare {sanity check}.

reaper: n. A {prowler} that {GFR}s files.  A file removed in
  this way is said to have been `reaped'.

rectangle slinger: n. See {polygon pusher}.

recursion: n. See {recursion}.  See also {tail recursion}.

recursive acronym:: pl.n. A hackish (and especially MIT) tradition
  is to choose acronyms that refer humorously to themselves or to
  other acronyms.  The classic examples were two MIT editors called
  EINE ("EINE Is Not EMACS") and ZWEI ("ZWEI Was EINE
  Initially").  More recently, there is a Scheme compiler called
  LIAR (Liar Imitates Apply Recursively), and {GNU} (q.v.,
  sense 1) stands for "GNU's Not UNIX!" --- and a company with
  the name CYGNUS, which expands to "Cygnus, Your GNU Support".
  See also {mung}, {EMACS}.

Red Book: n. 1. Informal name for one of the three standard
  references on PostScript (`PostScript Language Reference
  Manual', Adobe Systems (Addison-Wesley, 1985; QA76.73.P67P67; ISBN
  0-201-10174-2); the others are known as the {Green Book} and
  the {Blue Book}.  2. Informal name for one of the 3 standard
  references on Smalltalk (`Smalltalk-80: The Interactive
  Programming Environment' by Adele Goldberg (Addison-Wesley, 1984;
  QA76.8.S635G638; ISBN 0-201-11372-4); this too is associated with
  blue and green books).  3. Any of the 1984 standards issued by the
  CCITT eighth plenary assembly.  Until now, these have changed color
  each review cycle (1988 was {Blue Book}, 1992 will be {Green
  Book}); however, it is rumored that this convention is going to be
  dropped before 1992.  These include, among other things, the
  X.400 email spec and the Group 1 through 4 fax standards.  4. The
  new version of the {Green Book} (sense 4) --- IEEE 1003.1-1990, a.k.a
  ISO 9945-1 --- is (because of the color and the fact that it is
  printed on A4 paper) known in the U.S.A. as "the Ugly Red Book
  That Won't Fit On The Shelf" and in Europe as "the Ugly Red Book
  That's A Sensible Size".  5. The NSA `Trusted Network
  Interpretation' companion to the {Orange Book}.  See also
  {{book titles}}.

regexp: /reg'eksp/ [UNIX] n. (alt. `regex' or `reg-ex')
  1. Common written and spoken abbreviation for `regular
  expression', one of the wildcard patterns used, e.g., by UNIX
  utilities such as `grep(1)', `sed(1)', and `awk(1)'.
  These use conventions similar to but more elaborate than those
  described under {glob}.  For purposes of this lexicon, it is
  sufficient to note that regexps also allow complemented character
  sets using `^'; thus, one can specify `any non-alphabetic
  character' with `[^A-Za-z]'.  2. Name of a well-known PD
  regexp-handling package in portable C, written by revered USENETter
  Henry Spencer ([email protected]).

reincarnation, cycle of: n. See {cycle of reincarnation}.

reinvent the wheel: v. To design or implement a tool equivalent to
  an existing one or part of one, with the implication that doing so
  is silly or a waste of time.  This is often a valid criticism.
  On the other hand, automobiles don't use wooden rollers, and some
  kinds of wheel have to be reinvented many times before you get them
  right.  On the third hand, people reinventing the wheel do tend to
  come up with the moral equivalent of a trapezoid with an offset
  axle.

religious issues: n. Questions which seemingly cannot be raised
  without touching off {holy wars}, such as "What is the best
  operating system (or editor, language, architecture, shell, mail
  reader, news reader)?", "What about that Heinlein guy, eh?",
  "What should we add to the new Jargon File?"  See {holy wars};
  see also {theology}, {bigot}.

  This term is an example of {ha ha only serious}.  People
  actually develop the most amazing and religiously intense
  attachments to their tools, even when the tools are intangible.
  The most constructive thing one can do when one stumbles into the
  crossfire is mumble {Get a life!} and leave --- unless, of course,
  one's *own* unassailably rational and obviously correct
  choices are being slammed.

replicator: n. Any construct that acts to produce copies of itself;
  this could be a living organism, an idea (see {meme}), a program
  (see {worm}, {wabbit}, and {virus}), a pattern in a cellular
  automaton (see {life}, sense 1), or (speculatively) a robot or
  {nanobot}.  It is even claimed by some that {{UNIX}} and {C}
  are the symbiotic halves of an extremely successful replicator; see
  {UNIX conspiracy}.

reply: n. See {followup}.

reset: [the MUD community] v. In AberMUD, to bring all dead mobiles
  to life and move items back to their initial starting places. New
  players who can't find anything shout "Reset! Reset!" quite a bit.
  Higher-level players shout back "No way!" since they know where
  points are to be found.  Used in {RL}, it means to put things back
  to the way they were when you found them.

restriction: n. A {bug} or design error that limits a program's
  capabilities, and which is sufficiently egregious that nobody can
  quite work up enough nerve to describe it as a {feature}.  Often
  used (esp. by {marketroid} types) to make it sound as though
  some crippling bogosity had been intended by the designers all
  along, or was forced upon them by arcane technical constraints of a
  nature no mere user could possibly comprehend (these claims are
  almost invariably false).

  Old-time hacker Joseph M. Newcomer advises that whenever choosing a
  quantifiable but arbitrary restriction, you should make it either a
  power of 2 or a power of 2 minus 1.  If you impose a limit of
  17 items in a list, everyone will know it is a random number --- on
  the other hand, a limit of 15 or 16 suggests some deep reason
  (involving 0- or 1-based indexing in binary) and you will get less
  {flamage} for it.  Limits which are round numbers in base 10 are
  always especially suspect.

retcon: /ret'kon/ [`retroactive continuity', from the USENET
  newsgroup rec.arts.comics] 1. n. The common situation in pulp
  fiction (esp. comics or soap operas) where a new story `reveals'
  things about events in previous stories, usually leaving the
  `facts' the same (thus preserving continuity) while completely
  changing their interpretation.  E.g., revealing that a whole season
  of "Dallas" was a dream was a retcon.  2. vt. To write such a
  story about a character or fictitious object.  "Byrne has
  retconned Superman's cape so that it is no longer unbreakable."
  "Marvelman's old adventures were retconned into synthetic
  dreams."  "Swamp Thing was retconned from a transformed person
  into a sentient vegetable."

  [This is included because it is a good example of hackish linguistic
  innovation in a field completely unrelated to computers.  The word
  `retcon' will probably spread through comics fandom and lose its
  association with hackerdom within a couple of years; for the
  record, it started here. --- ESR]

RETI: v. Syn. {RTI}

retrocomputing: /ret'-roh-k*m-pyoo'ting/ n. Refers to emulations
  of way-behind-the-state-of-the-art hardware or software, or
  implementations of never-was-state-of-the-art; esp. if such
  implementations are elaborate practical jokes and/or parodies of
  more `serious' designs.  Perhaps the most widely distributed
  retrocomputing utility was the `pnch(6)' or `bcd(6)'
  program on V7 and other early UNIX versions, which would accept up
  to 80 characters of text argument and display the corresponding
  pattern in {{punched card}} code.  Other well-known retrocomputing
  hacks have included the programming language {INTERCAL}, a
  {JCL}-emulating shell for UNIX, the card-punch-emulating editor
  named 029, and various elaborate PDP-11 hardware emulators and RT-11
  OS emulators written just to keep an old, sourceless {Zork} binary
  running.

RFC: /R-F-C/ [Request For Comment] n. One of a long-established
  series of numbered Internet standards widely followed by commercial
  and PD software in the Internet and UNIX communities.  Perhaps the
  single most influential one has been RFC-822 (the Internet
  mail-format standard).  The RFCs are unusual in that they are
  floated by technical experts acting on their own initiative and
  reviewed by the Internet at large, rather than formally promulgated
  through an institution such as ANSI.  For this reason, they remain
  known as RFCs even once adopted.

RFE: /R-F-E/ n. 1. [techspeak] Request For Enhancement.  2. [from
  `Radio Free Europe', Bellcore and Sun] Radio Free Ethernet, a system
  (originated by Peter Langston) for broadcasting audio among Sun
  SPARCstations over the ethernet.

rib site: [by analogy with {backbone site}] n. A machine that
  has an on-demand high-speed link to a {backbone site} and serves
  as a regional distribution point for lots of third-party traffic in
  email and USENET news.  Compare {leaf site}, {backbone site}.

rice box: [from ham radio slang] n. Any Asian-made commodity
  computer, esp. an 80x86-based machine built to IBM PC-compatible
  ISA or EISA-bus standards.

Right Thing: n. That which is {compellingly} the correct or
  appropriate thing to use, do, say, etc.  Often capitalized, always
  emphasized in speech as though capitalized.  Use of this term often
  implies that in fact reasonable people may disagree.  "What's the
  right thing for LISP to do when it sees `(mod a 0)'?  Should
  it return `a', or give a divide-by-0 error?"  Oppose
  {Wrong Thing}.

RL: // [MUD community] n. Real Life.  "Firiss laughs in RL"
  means that Firiss's player is laughing.  Oppose {VR}.

roach: [Bell Labs] vt. To destroy, esp. of a data structure.  Hardware
  gets {toast}ed or {fried}, software gets roached.

robust: adj. Said of a system that has demonstrated an ability to
  recover gracefully from the whole range of exceptional inputs and
  situations in a given environment.  One step below {bulletproof}.
  Carries the additional connotation of elegance in addition to just
  careful attention to detail.  Compare {smart}, oppose
  {brittle}.

rococo: adj. {Baroque} in the extreme.  Used to imply that a
  program has become so encrusted with the software equivalent of
  gold leaf and curlicues that they have completely swamped the
  underlying design.  Called after the later and more extreme forms
  of Baroque architecture and decoration prevalent during the
  mid-1700s in Europe.  Fred Brooks (the man who coined
  {second-system effect}) said: "Every program eventually becomes
  rococo, and then rubble."

rogue: [UNIX] n. A Dungeons-and-Dragons-like game using character
  graphics, written under BSD UNIX and subsequently ported to other
  UNIX systems.  The original BSD `curses(3)' screen-handling
  package was hacked together by Ken Arnold to support
  `rogue(6)' and has since become one of UNIX's most important
  and heavily used application libraries.  Nethack, Omega, Larn, and
  an entire subgenre of computer dungeon games all took off from the
  inspiration provided by `rogue(6)'.  See {nethack}.

room-temperature IQ: [IBM] quant. 80 or below.  Used in describing the
  expected intelligence range of the {luser}.  "Well, but
  how's this interface going to play with the room-temperature IQ
  crowd?"  See {drool-proof paper}.  This is a much more insulting
  phrase in countries that use Celsius thermometers.

root: [UNIX] n. 1. The {superuser} account that ignores
  permission bits, user number 0 on a UNIX system.  This account
  has the user name `root'.  The term {avatar} is also used.
  2. The top node of the system directory structure (home directory
  of the root user).  3. By extension, the privileged
  system-maintenance login on any OS.  See {root mode}, {go root}.

root mode: n. Syn. with {wizard mode} or `wheel mode'.  Like
  these, it is often generalized to describe privileged states in
  systems other than OSes.

rot13: /rot ther'teen/ [USENET: from `rotate alphabet
  13 places'] n., v. The simple Caesar-cypher encryption that replaces
  each English letter with the one 13 places forward or back along
  the alphabet, so that "The butler did it!" becomes "Gur ohgyre
  qvq vg!"  Most USENET news reading and posting programs include a
  rot13 feature.  It is used to enclose the text in a sealed wrapper
  that the reader must choose to open --- e.g., for posting things
  that might offend some readers, or answers to puzzles.  A major
  advantage of rot13 over rot(N) for other N is that it
  is self-inverse, so the same code can be used for encoding and
  decoding.

rotary debugger: [Commodore] n. Essential equipment for those
  late-night or early-morning debugging sessions.  Mainly used as
  sustenance for the hacker.  Comes in many decorator colors, such as
  Sausage, Pepperoni, and Garbage.  See {pizza, ANSI standard}.

RSN: // adj. See {Real Soon Now}.

RTFAQ: /R-T-F-A-Q/ [USENET: primarily written, by analogy with
  {RTFM}] imp. Abbrev. for `Read the FAQ!', an exhortation that
  the person addressed ought to read the newsgroup's {FAQ list}
  before posting questions.

RTFM: /R-T-F-M/ [UNIX] imp. Acronym for `Read The Fucking
  Manual'.  1. Used by {guru}s to brush off questions they
  consider trivial or annoying.  Compare {Don't do that, then!}
  2. Used when reporting a problem to indicate that you aren't just
  asking out of {randomness}.  "No, I can't figure out how to
  interface UNIX to my toaster, and yes, I have RTFM."  Unlike
  sense 1, this use is considered polite.  See also
  {RTFAQ}, {RTM}.  The variant RTFS, where S = `Standard',
  has also been reported.  Compare {UTSL}.

RTI: /R-T-I/ interj. The mnemonic for the `return from
  interrupt' instruction on many computers including the 6502 and
  6800.  The variant `RETI' is found among former Z80 hackers (almost
  nobody programs these things in assembler anymore).  Equivalent to
  "Now, where was I?" or used to end a conversational digression.
  See {pop}; see also {POPJ}.

RTM: /R-T-M/ [USENET: acronym for `Read The Manual']
  1. Politer variant of {RTFM}.  2. Robert T. Morris, perpetrator
  of the great Internet worm of 1988; villain to many, na"ive hacker
  gone wrong to a few.  Morris claimed that the worm that brought
  the Internet to its knees was a benign experiment that got out of
  control as the result of a coding error.  After the storm of negative
  publicity that followed this blunder, Morris's name on ITS was
  hacked from RTM to {RTFM}.

rude: [WPI] adj. 1. (of a program) Badly written.  2. Functionally
  poor, e.g., a program that is very difficult to use because of
  gratuitously poor (random?) design decisions.  See {cuspy}.

runes: pl.n. 1. Anything that requires {heavy wizardry} or
  {black art} to {parse}: core dumps, JCL commands, APL, or code
  in a language you haven't a clue how to read.  Compare {casting
  the runes}, {Great Runes}.  2. Special display characters (for
  example, the high-half graphics on an IBM PC).

runic: adj. Syn. {obscure}.  VMS fans sometimes refer to UNIX as
  `Runix'; UNIX fans return the compliment by expanding VMS to `Very
  Messy Syntax' or `Vachement Mauvais Syst`eme' (French; lit.
  "Cowlike Bad System", idiomatically "Bitchy Bad System").

rusty iron: n. Syn. {tired iron}.  It has been claimed that this
  is the inevitable fate of {water MIPS}.

rusty memory: n. Mass-storage that uses iron-oxide-based magnetic
  media (esp. tape and the pre-Winchester removable disk packs used
  in {washing machine}s).  Compare {donuts}.

= S =
=====

S/N ratio: // n. (also `s/n ratio', `s:n ratio').  Syn.
  {signal-to-noise ratio}.  Often abbreviated `SNR'.

sacred: adj. Reserved for the exclusive use of something (an
  extension of the standard meaning).  Often means that anyone may
  look at the sacred object, but clobbering it will screw whatever it
  is sacred to.  The comment "Register 7 is sacred to the interrupt
  handler" appearing in a program would be interpreted by a hacker
  to mean that if any *other* part of the program changes the
  contents of register 7, dire consequences are likely to ensue.

saga: [WPI] n. A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random
  broken people.

  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L. Steele:

       Jon L. White (login name JONL) and I (GLS) were office mates at MIT
       for many years.  One April, we both flew from Boston to California
       for a week on research business, to consult face-to-face with some
       people at Stanford, particularly our mutual friend Richard P.
       Gabriel (RPG; see {Gabriel}).

       RPG picked us up at the San Francisco airport and drove us back to
       Palo Alto (going {logical} south on route 101, parallel to
       {El Camino Bignum}).  Palo Alto is adjacent to Stanford University and
       about 40 miles south of San Francisco.  We ate at The Good
       Earth, a `health food' restaurant, very popular, the sort whose
       milkshakes all contain honey and protein powder.  JONL ordered such
       a shake --- the waitress claimed the flavor of the day was
       "lalaberry".  I still have no idea what that might be, but it
       became a running joke.  It was the color of raspberry, and JONL
       said it tasted rather bitter.  I ate a better tostada there than I
       have ever had in a Mexican restaurant.

       After this we went to the local Uncle Gaylord's Old Fashioned Ice
       Cream Parlor.  They make ice cream fresh daily, in a variety of
       intriguing flavors.  It's a chain, and they have a slogan: "If you
       don't live near an Uncle Gaylord's --- MOVE!"  Also, Uncle
       Gaylord (a real person) wages a constant battle to force big-name
       ice cream makers to print their ingredients on the package (like
       air and plastic and other non-natural garbage).  JONL and I had
       first discovered Uncle Gaylord's the previous August, when we had
       flown to a computer-science conference in Berkeley, California, the
       first time either of us had been on the West Coast.  When not in
       the conference sessions, we had spent our time wandering the length
       of Telegraph Street, which (like Harvard Square in Cambridge) was
       lined with picturesque street vendors and interesting little shops.
       On that street we discovered Uncle Gaylord's Berkeley store.  The
       ice cream there was very good.  During that August visit JONL went
       absolutely bananas (so to speak) over one particular flavor, ginger
       honey.

       Therefore, after eating at The Good Earth --- indeed, after every
       lunch and dinner and before bed during our April visit --- a trip
       to Uncle Gaylord's (the one in Palo Alto) was mandatory.  We had
       arrived on a Wednesday, and by Thursday evening we had been there
       at least four times.  Each time, JONL would get ginger honey ice
       cream, and proclaim to all bystanders that "Ginger was the spice
       that drove the Europeans mad!  That's why they sought a route to
       the East!  They used it to preserve their otherwise off-taste
       meat."  After the third or fourth repetition RPG and I were
       getting a little tired of this spiel, and began to paraphrase him:
       "Wow!  Ginger!  The spice that makes rotten meat taste good!"
       "Say!  Why don't we find some dog that's been run over and sat in
       the sun for a week and put some *ginger* on it for dinner?!"
       "Right!  With a lalaberry shake!"  And so on.  This failed to
       faze JONL; he took it in good humor, as long as we kept returning
       to Uncle Gaylord's.  He loves ginger honey ice cream.

       Now RPG and his then-wife KBT (Kathy Tracy) were putting us up
       (putting up with us?) in their home for our visit, so to thank them
       JONL and I took them out to a nice French restaurant of their
       choosing.  I unadventurously chose the filet mignon, and KBT had
       je ne sais quoi du jour, but RPG and JONL had lapin
       (rabbit).  (Waitress: "Oui, we have fresh rabbit, fresh
       today."  RPG: "Well, JONL, I guess we won't need any
       *ginger*!")

       We finished the meal late, about 11 P.M., which is 2 A.M
       Boston time, so JONL and I were rather droopy.  But it wasn't yet
       midnight.  Off to Uncle Gaylord's!

       Now the French restaurant was in Redwood City, north of Palo Alto.
       In leaving Redwood City, we somehow got onto route 101 going north
       instead of south.  JONL and I wouldn't have known the difference
       had RPG not mentioned it.  We still knew very little of the local
       geography.  I did figure out, however, that we were headed in the
       direction of Berkeley, and half-jokingly suggested that we continue
       north and go to Uncle Gaylord's in Berkeley.

       RPG said "Fine!" and we drove on for a while and talked.  I was
       drowsy, and JONL actually dropped off to sleep for 5 minutes.
       When he awoke, RPG said, "Gee, JONL, you must have slept all the
       way over the bridge!", referring to the one spanning San Francisco
       Bay.  Just then we came to a sign that said "University Avenue".
       I mumbled something about working our way over to Telegraph Street;
       RPG said "Right!" and maneuvered some more.  Eventually we pulled
       up in front of an Uncle Gaylord's.

       Now, I hadn't really been paying attention because I was so sleepy,
       and I didn't really understand what was happening until RPG let me
       in on it a few moments later, but I was just alert enough to notice
       that we had somehow come to the Palo Alto Uncle Gaylord's after
       all.

       JONL noticed the resemblance to the Palo Alto store, but hadn't
       caught on.  (The place is lit with red and yellow lights at night,
       and looks much different from the way it does in daylight.)  He
       said, "This isn't the Uncle Gaylord's I went to in Berkeley!  It
       looked like a barn!  But this place looks *just like* the one
       back in Palo Alto!"

       RPG deadpanned, "Well, this is the one *I* always come to
       when I'm in Berkeley.  They've got two in San Francisco, too.
       Remember, they're a chain."

       JONL accepted this bit of wisdom.  And he was not totally ignorant
       --- he knew perfectly well that University Avenue was in Berkeley,
       not far from Telegraph Street.  What he didn't know was that there
       is a completely different University Avenue in Palo Alto.

       JONL went up to the counter and asked for ginger honey.  The guy at
       the counter asked whether JONL would like to taste it first,
       evidently their standard procedure with that flavor, as not too
       many people like it.

       JONL said, "I'm sure I like it.  Just give me a cone."  The guy
       behind the counter insisted that JONL try just a taste first.
       "Some people think it tastes like soap."  JONL insisted, "Look,
       I *love* ginger.  I eat Chinese food.  I eat raw ginger roots.  I
       already went through this hassle with the guy back in Palo Alto.  I
       *know* I like that flavor!"

       At the words "back in Palo Alto" the guy behind the counter got a
       very strange look on his face, but said nothing.  KBT caught his
       eye and winked.  Through my stupor I still hadn't quite grasped
       what was going on, and thought RPG was rolling on the floor
       laughing and clutching his stomach just because JONL had launched
       into his spiel ("makes rotten meat a dish for princes") for the
       forty-third time.  At this point, RPG clued me in fully.

       RPG, KBT, and I retreated to a table, trying to stifle our
       chuckles.  JONL remained at the counter, talking about ice cream
       with the guy b.t.c., comparing Uncle Gaylord's to other ice cream
       shops and generally having a good old time.

       At length the g.b.t.c. said, "How's the ginger honey?"  JONL
       said, "Fine!  I wonder what exactly is in it?"  Now Uncle Gaylord
       publishes all his recipes and even teaches classes on how to make
       his ice cream at home.  So the g.b.t.c. got out the recipe, and he
       and JONL pored over it for a while.  But the g.b.t.c. could
       contain his curiosity no longer, and asked again, "You really like
       that stuff, huh?"  JONL said, "Yeah, I've been eating it
       constantly back in Palo Alto for the past two days.  In fact, I
       think this batch is about as good as the cones I got back in Palo
       Alto!"

       G.b.t.c. looked him straight in the eye and said, "You're
       *in* Palo Alto!"

       JONL turned slowly around, and saw the three of us collapse in a
       fit of giggles.  He clapped a hand to his forehead and exclaimed,
       "I've been hacked!"

sagan: /say'gn/ [from Carl Sagan's TV series "Cosmos"; think
  "billions and billions"] n. A large quantity of anything.
  "There's a sagan different ways to tweak EMACS."  "The
  U.S. Government spends sagans on bombs and welfare --- hard to say which
  is more destructive."

SAIL:: /sayl/, not /S-A-I-L/ n. 1. Stanford Artificial
  Intelligence Lab.  An important site in the early development of
  LISP; with the MIT AI Lab, BBN, CMU, and the UNIX community, one of
  the major wellsprings of technical innovation and hacker-culture
  traditions (see the {{WAITS}} entry for details).  The SAIL
  machines were officially shut down in late May 1990, scant weeks
  after the MIT AI Lab's ITS cluster was officially decommissioned.
  2. The Stanford Artificial Intelligence Language used at SAIL
  (sense 1).  It was an Algol-60 derivative with a coroutining
  facility and some new data types intended for building search trees
  and association lists.

salescritter: /sayls'kri`tr/ n. Pejorative hackerism for a computer
  salesperson.  Hackers tell the following joke:

    Q. What's the difference between a used-car dealer and a
       computer salesman?
    A. The used-car dealer knows he's lying.

  This reflects the widespread hacker belief that salescritters are
  self-selected for stupidity (after all, if they had brains and the
  inclination to use them, they'd be in programming).  The terms
  `salesthing' and `salesdroid' are also common.  Compare
  {marketroid}, {suit}, {droid}.

salsman: /salz'm*n/ v. To flood a mailing list or newsgroup with
  huge amounts of useless, trivial or redundant information.  From
  the name of a hacker who has frequently done this on some widely
  distributed mailing lists.

salt mines: n. Dense quarters housing large numbers of programmers
  working long hours on grungy projects, with some hope of seeing the
  end of the tunnel in N years.  Noted for their absence of sunshine.
  Compare {playpen}, {sandbox}.

salt substrate: [MIT] n. Collective noun used to refer to potato
  chips, pretzels, saltines, or any other form of snack food
  designed primarily as a carrier for sodium chloride.  From the
  technical term `chip substrate', used to refer to the silicon on the
  top of which the active parts of integrated circuits are deposited.

same-day service: n. Ironic term used to describe long response
  time, particularly with respect to {{MS-DOS}} system calls (which
  ought to require only a tiny fraction of a second to execute).
  Such response time is a major incentive for programmers to write
  programs that are not {well-behaved}.  See also {PC-ism}.

sandbender: [IBM] n. A person involved with silicon lithography and
  the physical design of chips.  Compare {ironmonger}, {polygon
  pusher}.

sandbox: n. (or `sandbox, the') Common term for the
  R&D department at many software and computer companies (where hackers
  in commercial environments are likely to be found).  Half-derisive,
  but reflects the truth that research is a form of creative play.
  Compare {playpen}.

sanity check: n. 1. The act of checking a piece of code (or
  anything else, e.g., a USENET posting) for completely stupid mistakes.
  Implies that the check is to make sure the author was sane when it
  was written; e.g., if a piece of scientific software relied on a
  particular formula and was giving unexpected results, one might
  first look at the nesting of parentheses or the coding of the
  formula, as a {sanity check}, before looking at the more complex
  I/O or data structure manipulation routines, much less the
  algorithm itself.  Compare {reality check}.  2. A run-time test,
  either validating input or ensuring that the program hasn't screwed
  up internally (producing an inconsistent value or state).

Saturday night special: [from police slang for a cheap handgun] n.
  A program or feature kluged together during off hours, under a
  deadline, and in response to pressure from a {salescritter}.
  Such hacks are dangerously unreliable, but all too often sneak into
  a production release after insufficient review.

say: vt. 1. To type to a terminal.  "To list a directory
  verbosely, you have to say `ls -l'."  Tends to imply a
  {newline}-terminated command (a `sentence').  2. A computer
  may also be said to `say' things to you, even if it doesn't have
  a speech synthesizer, by displaying them on a terminal in response
  to your commands.  Hackers find it odd that this usage confuses
  {mundane}s.

science-fiction fandom:: n. Another voluntary subculture having a
  very heavy overlap with hackerdom; most hackers read SF and/or
  fantasy fiction avidly, and many go to `cons' (SF conventions) or
  are involved in fandom-connected activities such as the Society for
  Creative Anachronism.  Some hacker jargon originated in SF fandom;
  see {defenestration}, {great-wall}, {cyberpunk}, {h}, {ha ha
  only serious}, {IMHO}, {mundane}, {neep-neep}, {Real
  Soon Now}.  Additionally, the jargon terms {cowboy},
  {cyberspace}, {de-rezz}, {go flatline}, {ice}, {virus},
  {wetware}, {wirehead}, and {worm} originated in SF
  stories.

scram switch: [from the nuclear power industry] n. An
  emergency-power-off switch (see {Big Red Switch}), esp. one
  positioned to be easily hit by evacuating personnel.  In general,
  this is *not* something you {frob} lightly; these often
  initiate expensive events (such as Halon dumps) and are installed
  in a {dinosaur pen} for use in case of electrical fire or in
  case some luckless {field servoid} should put 120 volts across
  himself while {Easter egging}.

scratch: 1. [from `scratchpad'] adj. Describes a data
  structure or recording medium attached to a machine for testing or
  temporary-use purposes; one that can be {scribble}d on without
  loss.  Usually in the combining forms `scratch memory',
  `scratch register', `scratch disk', `scratch tape',
  `scratch volume'.  See {scratch monkey}.  2. [primarily
  IBM] vt. To delete (as in a file).

scratch monkey: n. As in "Before testing or reconfiguring, always
  mount a {scratch monkey}", a proverb used to advise caution when
  dealing with irreplaceable data or devices.  Used to refer to any
  scratch volume hooked to a computer during any risky operation as a
  replacement for some precious resource or data that might otherwise get
  trashed.

  This term preserves the memory of Mabel, the Swimming Wonder
  Monkey, star of a biological research program at the University of
  Toronto ca. 1986.  Mabel was not (so the legend goes) your ordinary
  monkey; the university had spent years teaching her how to swim,
  breathing through a regulator, in order to study the effects of
  different gas mixtures on her physiology.  Mabel suffered an
  untimely demise one day when DEC {PM}ed the PDP-11 controlling
  her regulator (see also {provocative maintainance}).

  It is recorded that, after calming down an understandably irate
  customer sufficiently to ascertain the facts of the matter, a DEC
  troubleshooter called up the {field circus} manager responsible
  and asked him sweetly, "Can you swim?"

  Not all the consequences to humans were so amusing; the sysop of
  the machine in question was nearly thrown in jail at the behest of
  certain clueless droids at the local `humane' society.  The moral
  is clear: When in doubt, always mount a scratch monkey.

screw: [MIT] n. A {lose}, usually in software.  Especially used for
  user-visible misbehavior caused by a bug or misfeature.  This use
  has become quite widespread outside MIT.

screwage: /skroo'*j/ n. Like {lossage} but connotes that the
  failure is due to a designed-in misfeature rather than a simple
  inadequacy or a mere bug.

scribble: n. To modify a data structure in a random and
  unintentionally destructive way.  "Bletch! Somebody's
  disk-compactor program went berserk and scribbled on the i-node
  table."  "It was working fine until one of the allocation routines
  scribbled on low core."  Synonymous with {trash}; compare {mung},
  which conveys a bit more intention, and {mangle}, which is more
  violent and final.

scrog: /skrog/ [Bell Labs] vt. To damage, trash, or corrupt a
  data structure.  "The list header got scrogged."  Also reported
  as `skrog', and ascribed to the comic strip "The Wizard of
  Id".  Equivalent to {scribble} or {mangle}.

scrool: /skrool/ [from the pioneering Roundtable chat system in
  Houston ca. 1984; prob. originated as a typo for `scroll'] n. The
  log of old messages, available for later perusal or to help one get
  back in synch with the conversation. It was originally called the
  `scrool monster', because an early version of the roundtable
  software had a bug where it would dump all 8K of scrool on a user's
  terminal.

scrozzle: /skroz'l/ vt. Used when a self-modifying code segment runs
  incorrectly and corrupts the running program or vital data.  "The
  damn compiler scrozzled itself again!"

SCSI: [Small Computer System Interface] n. A bus-independent
  standard for system-level interfacing between a computer and
  intelligent devices.  Typically annotated in literature with `sexy'
  (/sek'see/), `sissy' (/sis'ee/), and `scuzzy' (/skuh'zee/) as
  pronunciation guides --- the last being the overwhelmingly
  predominant form, much to the dismay of the designers and their
  marketing people.  One can usually assume that a person who
  pronounces it /S-C-S-I/ is clueless.

search-and-destroy mode: n. Hackerism for the search-and-replace
  facility in an editor, so called because an incautiously chosen
  match pattern can cause {infinite} damage.

second-system effect: n. (sometimes, more euphoniously,
  `second-system syndrome') When one is designing the successor to
  a relatively small, elegant, and successful system, there is a
  tendency to become grandiose in one's success and design an
  {elephantine} feature-laden monstrosity.  The term was first
  used by Fred Brooks in his classic `The Mythical Man-Month:
  Essays on Software Engineering' (Addison-Wesley, 1975; ISBN
  0-201-00650-2).  It described the jump from a set of nice, simple
  operating systems on the IBM 70xx series to OS/360 on the
  360 series.  A similar effect can also happen in an evolving
  system; see {Brooks's Law}, {creeping elegance}, {creeping
  featurism}.  See also {{Multics}}, {OS/2}, {X}, {software
  bloat}.

  This version of the jargon lexicon has been described (with
  altogether too much truth for comfort) as an example of
  second-system effect run amok on jargon-1....

secondary damage: n. When a fatal error occurs (esp. a
  {segfault}) the immediate cause may be that a pointer has been
  trashed due to a previous {fandango on core}.  However, this
  fandango may have been due to an *earlier* fandango, so no
  amount of analysis will reveal (directly) how the damage occurred.
  "The data structure was clobbered, but it was secondary damage."

  By extension, the corruption resulting from N cascaded
  fandangoes on core is `Nth-level damage'.  There is at least
  one case on record in which 17 hours of {grovel}ling with
  `adb' actually dug up the underlying bug behind an instance of
  seventh-level damage!  The hacker who accomplished this
  near-superhuman feat was presented with an award by his fellows.

security through obscurity: n. A name applied by hackers to most OS
  vendors' favorite way of coping with security holes --- namely,
  ignoring them and not documenting them and trusting that nobody
  will find out about them and that people who do find out about them
  won't exploit them.  This never works for long and occasionally
  sets the world up for debacles like the {RTM} worm of 1988, but once
  the brief moments of panic created by such events subside most
  vendors are all too willing to turn over and go back to sleep.
  After all, actually fixing the bugs would siphon off the resources
  needed to implement the next user-interface frill on marketing's
  wish list --- and besides, if they started fixing security bugs
  customers might begin to *expect* it and imagine that their
  warranties of merchantability gave them some sort of *right*
  to a system with fewer holes in it than a shotgunned Swiss cheese,
  and then where would we be?

  Historical note: It is claimed (with dissent from {{ITS}} fans who
  say they used to use `security through obscurity' in a positive
  sense) that this term was first used in the USENET newsgroup in
  comp.sys.apollo during a campaign to get HP/Apollo to fix
  security problems in its UNIX-{clone} Aegis/DomainOS.  They
  didn't change a thing.

SED: [TMRC, from `Light-Emitting Diode'] /S-E-D/ n.
  Smoke-emitting diode.  A {friode} that lost the war. See
  {LER}.

segfault: n.,vi. Syn. {segment}, {seggie}.

seggie: /seg'ee/ [UNIX] n. Shorthand for {segmentation fault}
  reported from Britain.

segment: /seg'ment/ vi. To experience a {segmentation fault}.
  Confusingly, this is often pronounced more like the noun `segment'
  than like mainstream v. segment; this is because it is actually a
  noun shorthand that has been verbed.

segmentation fault: n. [UNIX] 1. An error in which a running program
  attempts to access memory not allocated to it and {core dump}s
  with a segmentation violation error.  2. To lose a train of
  thought or a line of reasoning.  Also uttered as an exclamation at
  the point of befuddlement.

segv: /seg'vee/ n.,vi. Yet another synonym for {segmentation
  fault} (actually, in this case, `segmentation violation').

self-reference: n. See {self-reference}.

selvage: /sel'v*j/ [from sewing] n. See {chad} (sense 1).

semi: /se'mee/ or /se'mi:/ 1. n. Abbreviation for
  `semicolon', when speaking.  "Commands to {grind} are
  prefixed by semi-semi-star" means that the prefix is `;;*',
  not 1/4 of a star.  2. A prefix used with words such as
  `immediately' as a qualifier.  "When is the system coming up?"
  "Semi-immediately." (That is, maybe not for an hour.)  "We did
  consider that possibility semi-seriously."  See also
  {infinite}.

semi-infinite: n. See {infinite}.

senior bit: [IBM] n. Syn. {meta bit}.

server: n. A kind of {daemon} that performs a service for the
  requester and which often runs on a computer other than the one on
  which the server runs.  A particularly common term on the Internet,
  which is rife with `name servers', `domain servers', `news
  servers', `finger servers', and the like.

SEX: /seks/ [Sun Users' Group & elsewhere] n. 1. Software
  EXchange.  A technique invented by the blue-green algae hundreds of
  millions of years ago to speed up their evolution, which had been
  terribly slow up until then.  Today, SEX parties are popular among
  hackers and others (of course, these are no longer limited to
  exchanges of genetic software).  In general, SEX parties are a
  {Good Thing}, but unprotected SEX can propagate a {virus}.
  See also {pubic directory}.  2. The rather Freudian mnemonic
  often used for Sign EXtend, a machine instruction found in the
  PDP-11 and many other architectures.

  DEC's engineers nearly got a PDP-11 assembler that used the
  `SEX' mnemonic out the door at one time, but (for once)
  marketing wasn't asleep and forced a change.  That wasn't the last
  time this happened, either.  The author of `The Intel 8086
  Primer', who was one of the original designers of the 8086, noted
  that there was originally a `SEX' instruction on that
  processor, too.  He says that Intel management got cold feet and
  decreed that it be changed, and thus the instruction was renamed
  `CBW' and `CWD' (depending on what was being extended).
  Amusingly, the Intel 8048 (the microcontroller used in IBM PC
  keyboards) is also missing straight `SEX' but has logical-or
  and logical-and instructions `ORL' and `ANL'.

  The Motorola 6809, used in the U.K.'s `Dragon 32' personal
  computer, actually had an official `SEX' instruction; the 6502
  in the Apple II it competed with did not.  British hackers thought
  this made perfect mythic sense; after all, it was commonly
  observed, you could have sex with a dragon, but you can't have sex
  with an apple.

sex changer: n. Syn. {gender mender}.

shareware: /sheir'weir/ n. {Freeware} (sense 1) for which the
  author requests some payment, usually in the accompanying
  documentation files or in an announcement made by the software
  itself.  Such payment may or may not buy additional support or
  functionality.  See {guiltware}, {crippleware}.

shelfware: /shelfweir/ n. Software purchased on a whim (by an
  individual user) or in accordance with policy (by a corporation or
  government agency), but not actually required for any particular use.
  Therefore, it often ends up on some shelf.

shell: [orig. {{Multics}} techspeak, widely propagated via UNIX] n.
  1. [techspeak] The command interpreter used to pass commands to an
  operating system; so called because it is the part of the operating
  system that interfaces with the outside world.  2. More generally,
  any interface program that mediates access to a special resource
  or {server} for convenience, efficiency, or security reasons; for
  this meaning, the usage is usually `a shell around' whatever.
  This sort of program is also called a `wrapper'.

shell out: [UNIX] n. To spawn an interactive {subshell} from
  within a program (e.g., a mailer or editor).  "Bang foo runs foo in
  a subshell, while bang alone shells out."

shift left (or right) logical: [from any of various machines'
  instruction sets] 1. vi. To move oneself to the left (right).  To
  move out of the way.  2. imper. "Get out of that (my) seat!  You
  can shift to that empty one to the left (right)."  Often
  used without the `logical', or as `left shift' instead of
  `shift left'.  Sometimes heard as LSH /lish/, from the {PDP-10}
  instruction set.  See {Programmer's Cheer}.

shitogram: /shit'oh-gram/ n. A *really* nasty piece of email.
  Compare {nastygram}, {flame}.

short card: n. A half-length IBM PC expansion card or adapter that
  will fit in one of the two short slots located towards the right
  rear of a standard chassis (tucked behind the floppy disk drives).
  See also {tall card}.

shotgun debugging: n. The software equivalent of {Easter egging};
  the making of relatively undirected changes to software in the hope
  that a bug will be perturbed out of existence.  This almost never
  works, and usually introduces more bugs.

showstopper: n. A hardware or (especially) software bug that makes
  an implementation effectively unusable; one that absolutely has to
  be fixed before development can go on.  Opposite in connotation
  from its original theatrical use, which refers to something
  stunningly *good*.

shriek: n. See {excl}.  Occasional CMU usage, also in common use
  among APL fans and mathematicians, especially category theorists.

Shub-Internet: /shuhb in't*r-net/ [MUD: from H. P. Lovecraft's
  evil fictional deity `Shub-Niggurath', the Black Goat with a
  Thousand Young] n.  The harsh personification of the Internet,
  Beast of a Thousand Processes, Eater of Characters, Avatar of Line
  Noise, and Imp of Call Waiting; the hideous multi-tendriled entity
  formed of all the manifold connections of the net.  A sect of
  MUDders worships Shub-Internet, sacrificing objects and praying for
  good connections.  To no avail --- its purpose is malign and evil,
  and is the cause of all network slowdown.  Often heard as in
  "Freela casts a tac nuke at Shub-Internet for slowing her down."
  (A forged response often follows along the lines of: "Shub-Internet
  gulps down the tac nuke and burps happily.")  Also cursed by users
  of {FTP} and {telnet} when the system slows down.  The dread
  name of Shub-Internet is seldom spoken aloud, as it is said that
  repeating it three times will cause the being to wake, deep within its
  lair beneath the Pentagon.

sidecar: n. 1. Syn. {slap on the side}.  Esp. used of add-ons
  for the late and unlamented IBM PCjr.  2. The IBM PC compatibility
  box that could be bolted onto the side of an Amiga.  Designed and
  produced by Commodore, it broke all of the company's own rules.
  If it worked with any other peripherals, it was by {magic}.

sig block: /sig blok/ [UNIX: often written `.sig' there] n.
  Short for `signature', used specifically to refer to the
  electronic signature block that most UNIX mail- and news-posting
  software will {automagically} append to outgoing mail and news.
  The composition of one's sig can be quite an art form, including an
  ASCII logo or one's choice of witty sayings (see {sig quote},
  {fool file}); but many consider large sigs a waste of
  {bandwidth}, and it has been observed that the size of one's sig
  block is usually inversely proportional to one's longevity and
  level of prestige on the net.

sig quote: /sig kwoht/ [USENET] n. A maxim, quote, proverb, joke,
  or slogan embedded in one's {sig block} and intended to convey
  something of one's philosophical stance, pet peeves, or sense of
  humor. "Calm down, it's only ones and zeroes."

signal-to-noise ratio: [from analog electronics] n. Used by hackers
  in a generalization of its technical meaning.  `Signal' refers to
  useful information conveyed by some communications medium, and
  `noise' to anything else on that medium.  Hence a low ratio implies
  that it is not worth paying attention to the medium in question.
  Figures for such metaphorical ratios are never given.  The term is
  most often applied to {USENET} newsgroups during {flame war}s.
  Compare {bandwidth}.  See also {coefficient of X}, {lost in
  the noise}.

silicon: n. Hardware, esp. ICs or microprocessor-based computer
  systems (compare {iron}).  Contrasted with software.  See also
  {sandbender}.

silicon foundry: n. A company that {fab}s chips to the designs of
  others.  As of the late 1980s, the combination of silicon foundries
  and good computer-aided design software made it much easier for
  hardware-designing startup companies to come into being.  The
  downside of using a silicon foundry is that the distance from the
  actual chip-fabrication processes reduces designers' control of detail.
  This is somewhat analogous to the use of {HLL}s versus coding in
  assembler.

silly walk: [from Monty Python's Flying Circus] vi. 1. A ridiculous
  procedure required to accomplish a task.  Like {grovel}, but more
  {random} and humorous.  "I had to silly-walk through half the
  /usr directories to find the maps file."  2. Syn. {fandango on
  core}.

silo: n. The FIFO input-character buffer in an RS-232 line card.  So
  called from DEC terminology used on DH and DZ line cards for the
  VAX and PDP-11, presumably because it was a storage space for
  fungible stuff that you put in the top and took out the bottom.

Silver Book: n. Jensen and Wirth's infamous `Pascal User Manual
  and Report', so called because of the silver cover of the
  widely distributed Springer-Verlag second edition of 1978 (ISBN
  0-387-90144-2).  See {{book titles}}, {Pascal}.

since time T equals minus infinity: adj. A long time ago; for as
  long as anyone can remember; at the time that some particular frob
  was first designed.  Usually the word `time' is omitted.  See also
  {time T}.

sitename: /si:t'naym/ [UNIX/Internet] n. The unique electronic
  name of a computer system, used to identify it in UUCP mail,
  USENET, or other forms of electronic information interchange.  The
  folklore interest of sitenames stems from the creativity and humor
  they often display.  Interpreting a sitename is not unlike
  interpreting a vanity license plate; one has to mentally unpack it,
  allowing for mono-case and length restrictions and the lack of
  whitespace.  Hacker tradition deprecates dull,
  institutional-sounding names in favor of punchy, humorous, and
  clever coinages (except that it is considered appropriate for the
  official public gateway machine of an organization to bear the
  organization's name or acronym).  Mythological references, cartoon
  characters, animal names, and allusions to SF or fantasy literature
  are probably the most popular sources for sitenames (in roughly
  descending order).  The obligatory comment when discussing these is
  Harris's Lament: "All the good ones are taken!"  See also
  {network address}.

skrog: v. Syn. {scrog}.

skulker: n. Syn. {prowler}.

slap on the side: n. (also called a {sidecar}, or abbreviated
  `SOTS'.)  A type of external expansion hardware marketed by
  computer manufacturers (e.g., Commodore for the Amiga 500/1000
  series and IBM for the hideous failure called `PCjr').  Various
  SOTS boxes provided necessities such as memory, hard drive
  controllers, and conventional expansion slots.

slash: n. Common name for the slant (`/', ASCII 0101111)
  character.  See {ASCII} for other synonyms.

sleep: vi. 1. [techspeak] On a timesharing system, a process that
  relinquishes its claim on the scheduler until some given event
  occurs or a specified time delay elapses is said to `go to
  sleep'.  2. In jargon, used very similarly to v. {block}; also
  in `sleep on', syn. with `block on'.  Often used to
  indicate that the speaker has relinquished a demand for resources
  until some (possibly unspecified) external event: "They can't get
  the fix I've been asking for into the next release, so I'm going to
  sleep on it until the release, then start hassling them again."

slim: n. A small, derivative change (e.g., to code).

slop: n. 1. A one-sided {fudge factor}, that is, an allowance for
  error but in only one of two directions.  For example, if you need
  a piece of wire 10 feet long and have to guess when you cut it,
  you make very sure to cut it too long, by a large amount if
  necessary, rather than too short by even a little bit, because you
  can always cut off the slop but you can't paste it back on again.
  When discrete quantities are involved, slop is often introduced to
  avoid the possibility of being on the losing side of a {fencepost
  error}.  2. The percentage of `extra' code generated by a compiler
  over the size of equivalent assembler code produced by
  {hand-hacking}; i.e., the space (or maybe time) you lose because
  you didn't do it yourself.  This number is often used as a measure
  of the goodness of a compiler; slop below 5% is very good, and
  10% is usually acceptable.  With modern compiler technology, esp.
  on RISC machines, the compiler's slop may actually be
  *negative*; that is, humans may be unable to generate code as
  good.  This is one of the reasons assembler programming is no
  longer common.

slopsucker: /slop'suhk-r/ n. A lowest-priority task that must
  wait around until everything else has `had its fill' of machine
  resources.  Only when the machine would otherwise be idle is the
  task allowed to `suck up the slop'.  Also called a {hungry
  puppy}.  One common variety of slopsucker hunts for large prime
  numbers.  Compare {background}.

slurp: vt. To read a large data file entirely into {core} before
  working on it.  This may be contrasted with the strategy of reading
  a small piece at a time, processing it, and then reading the next
  piece.  "This program slurps in a 1K-by-1K matrix and does
  an FFT."  See also {sponge}.

smart: adj. Said of a program that does the {Right Thing} in a
  wide variety of complicated circumstances.  There is a difference
  between calling a program smart and calling it intelligent; in
  particular, there do not exist any intelligent programs (yet ---
  see {AI-complete}).  Compare {robust} (smart programs can be
  {brittle}).

smart terminal: n. A terminal that has enough computing capability
  to render graphics or to offload some kind of front-end processing
  from the computer it talks to.  The development of workstations and
  personal computers has made this term and the product it describes
  semi-obsolescent, but one may still hear variants of the phrase
  `act like a smart terminal' used to describe the behavior of
  workstations or PCs with respect to programs that execute almost
  entirely out of a remote {server}'s storage, using said devices
  as displays.  Compare {glass tty}.

  There is a classic quote from Rob Pike (inventor of the {blit}
  terminal): "A smart terminal is not a smart*ass* terminal,
  but rather a terminal you can educate."  This illustrates a common
  design problem: The attempt to make peripherals (or anything else)
  intelligent sometimes results in finicky, rigid `special
  features' that become just so much dead weight if you try to use
  the device in any way the designer didn't anticipate.  Flexibility
  and programmability, on the other hand, are *really* smart.
  Compare {hook}.

smash case: vi. To lose or obliterate the uppercase/lowercase
  distinction in text input.  "MS-DOS will automatically smash case
  in the names of all the files you create."  Compare {fold case}.

smash the stack: [C programming] n. On many C implementations it is
  possible to corrupt the execution stack by writing past the end of
  an array declared `auto' in a routine.  Code that does this is
  said to `smash the stack', and can cause return from the routine
  to jump to a random address.  This can produce some of the most
  insidious data-dependent bugs known to mankind.  Variants include
  `trash' the stack, {scribble} the stack, {mangle} the stack;
  the term *{mung} the stack is not used, as this is never done
  intentionally.  See {spam}; see also {aliasing bug},
  {fandango on core}, {memory leak}, {precedence lossage},
  {overrun screw}.

smiley: n. See {emoticon}.

smoke test: n. 1. A rudimentary form of testing applied to
  electronic equipment following repair or reconfiguration, in which
  power is applied and the tester checks for sparks, smoke, or other
  dramatic signs of fundamental failure.  See {magic smoke}.  2. By
  extension, the first run of a piece of software after construction
  or a critical change.  See and compare {reality check}.

  There is an interesting semi-parallel to this term among
  typographers and printers: When new typefaces are being punch-cut by
  hand, a `smoke test' (hold the letter in candle smoke, then press
  it onto paper) is used to check out new dies.

smoking clover: [ITS] n. A {display hack} originally due to
  Bill Gosper.  Many convergent lines are drawn on a color monitor in
  {AOS} mode (so that every pixel struck has its color
  incremented).  The lines all have one endpoint in the middle of the
  screen; the other endpoints are spaced one pixel apart around the
  perimeter of a large square.  The color map is then repeatedly
  rotated.  This results in a striking, rainbow-hued, shimmering
  four-leaf clover.  Gosper joked about keeping it hidden from the
  FDA (the U.S.'s Food and Drug Administration) lest its
  hallucinogenic properties cause it to be banned.

SMOP: /S-M-O-P/ [Simple (or Small) Matter of Programming] n.
  1. A piece of code, not yet written, whose anticipated length is
  significantly greater than its complexity.  Used to refer to a
  program that could obviously be written, but is not worth the
  trouble.  Also used ironically to imply that a difficult problem
  can be easily solved because a program can be written to do it; the
  irony is that it is very clear that writing such a program will be
  a great deal of work.  "It's easy to enhance a FORTRAN compiler to
  compile COBOL as well; it's just a SMOP."  2. Often used
  ironically by the intended victim when a suggestion for a program
  is made which seems easy to the suggester, but is obviously (to the
  victim) a lot of work.

SNAFU principle: /sna'foo prin'si-pl/ [from WWII Army acronym
  for `Situation Normal, All Fucked Up'] n. "True communication is
  possible only between equals, because inferiors are more
  consistently rewarded for telling their superiors pleasant lies
  than for telling the truth." --- a central tenet of
  {Discordianism}, often invoked by hackers to explain why
  authoritarian hierarchies screw up so reliably and systematically.
  The effect of the SNAFU principle is a progressive disconnection of
  decision-makers from reality.  This lightly adapted version of a
  fable dating back to the early 1960s illustrates the phenomenon
  perfectly:

    In the beginning was the plan,
           and then the specification;
    And the plan was without form,
           and the specification was void.

    And darkness
           was on the faces of the implementors thereof;
    And they spake unto their leader,
           saying:
    "It is a crock of shit,
           and smells as of a sewer."

    And the leader took pity on them,
           and spoke to the project leader:
    "It is a crock of excrement,
           and none may abide the odor thereof."

    And the project leader
           spake unto his section head, saying:
    "It is a container of excrement,
           and it is very strong, such that none may abide it."

    The section head then hurried to his department manager,
           and informed him thus:
    "It is a vessel of fertilizer,
           and none may abide its strength."

    The department manager carried these words
          to his general manager,
    and spoke unto him
          saying:
    "It containeth that which aideth the growth of plants,
          and it is very strong."

    And so it was that the general manager rejoiced
          and delivered the good news unto the Vice President.
    "It promoteth growth,
          and it is very powerful."

    The Vice President rushed to the President's side,
          and joyously exclaimed:
    "This powerful new software product
          will promote the growth of the company!"

    And the President looked upon the product,
          and saw that it was very good.

  After the subsequent disaster, the {suit}s protect themselves by
  saying "I was misinformed!", and the implementors are demoted or
  fired.

snail: vt. To {snail-mail} something. "Snail me a copy of those
  graphics, will you?"

snail-mail: n. Paper mail, as opposed to electronic.  Sometimes
  written as the single word `SnailMail'.  One's postal address is,
  correspondingly, a `snail address'.  Derives from earlier coinage
  `USnail' (from `U.S. Mail'), for which there have been
  parody posters and stamps made.  Oppose {email}.

snap: v. To replace a pointer to a pointer with a direct pointer;
  to replace an old address with the forwarding address found there.
  If you telephone the main number for an institution and ask for a
  particular person by name, the operator may tell you that person's
  extension before connecting you, in the hopes that you will `snap
  your pointer' and dial direct next time.  The underlying metaphor
  may be that of a rubber band stretched through a number of
  intermediate points; if you remove all the thumbtacks in the
  middle, it snaps into a straight line from first to last.  See
  {chase pointers}.

  Often, the behavior of a {trampoline} is to perform an error
  check once and then snap the pointer that invoked it so as henceforth
  to bypass the trampoline (and its one-shot error check).  In this
  context one also speaks of `snapping links'.  For example, in a
  Lisp implementation, a function interface trampoline might check to
  make sure that the caller is passing the correct number of arguments;
  if it is, and if the caller and the callee are both compiled, then
  snapping the link allows that particular path to use a direct
  procedure-call instruction with no further overhead.

snarf: /snarf/ vt. 1. To grab, esp. to grab a large document
  or file for the purpose of using it with or without the author's
  permission.  See also {BLT}.  2. [in the UNIX community] To
  fetch a file or set of files across a network.  See also
  {blast}.  This term was mainstream in the late 1960s, meaning
  `to eat piggishly'.  It may still have this connotation in context.
  "He's in the snarfing phase of hacking --- {FTP}ing megs of
  stuff a day."  3. To acquire, with little concern for legal forms
  or politesse (but not quite by stealing).  "They were giving
  away samples, so I snarfed a bunch of them."  4. Syn. for
  {slurp}.  "This program starts by snarfing the entire database
  into core, then...."

snarf & barf: /snarf'n-barf`/ n. Under a {WIMP environment},
  the act of grabbing a region of text and then stuffing the contents
  of that region into another region (or the same one) to avoid
  retyping a command line.  In the late 1960s, this was a mainstream
  expression for an `eat now, regret it later' cheap-restaurant
  expedition.

snarf down: v. To {snarf}, with the connotation of absorbing,
  processing, or understanding.  "I'll  snarf down the latest
  version of the {nethack} user's guide --- It's been a while
  since I played last and I don't know what's changed recently."

snark: [Lewis Carroll, via the Michigan Terminal System] n. 1. A
  system failure.  When a user's process bombed, the operator would
  get the message "Help, Help, Snark in MTS!"  2. More generally,
  any kind of unexplained or threatening event on a computer
  (especially if it might be a boojum).  Often used to refer to an
  event or a log file entry that might indicate an attempted security
  violation.  See {snivitz}.  3. UUCP name of
  snark.thyrsus.com, home site of the Jargon File 2.*.* versions
  (i.e., this lexicon).

sneakernet: /snee'ker-net/ n. Term used (generally with ironic
  intent) for transfer of electronic information by physically
  carrying tape, disks, or some other media from one machine to
  another.  "Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon
  filled with magtape, or a 747 filled with CD-ROMs."  Also called
  `Tennis-Net', `Armpit-Net', `Floppy-Net'.

sniff: v.,n. Synonym for {poll}.

snivitz: /sniv'itz/ n. A hiccup in hardware or software; a small,
  transient problem of unknown origin (less serious than a
  {snark}).  Compare {glitch}.

SO: /S-O/ n. 1. (also `S.O.') Abbrev. for Significant
  Other, almost invariably written abbreviated and pronounced
  /S-O/ by hackers.  Used to refer to one's primary
  relationship, esp. a live-in to whom one is not married.  See
  {MOTAS}, {MOTOS}, {MOTSS}.  2. The Shift Out control
  character in ASCII (Control-N, 0001110).

social science number: [IBM] n. A statistic that is
  {content-free}, or nearly so.  A measure derived via methods of
  questionable validity from data of a dubious and vague nature.
  Predictively, having a social science number in hand is seldom much
  better than nothing, and can be considerably worse.  {Management}
  loves them.  See also {numbers}, {math-out}, {pretty
  pictures}.

soft boot: n. See {boot}.

softcopy: /soft'ko-pee/ n. [by analogy with `hardcopy'] A
  machine-readable form of corresponding hardcopy.  See {bits},
  {machinable}.

software bloat: n. The results of {second-system effect} or
  {creeping featuritis}.  Commonly cited examples include
  `ls(1)', {X}, {BSD}, {Missed'em-five}, and {OS/2}.

software rot: n. Term used to describe the tendency of software
  that has not been used in a while to {lose}; such failure may be
  semi-humorously ascribed to {bit rot}.  More commonly,
  `software rot' strikes when a program's assumptions become out
  of date.  If the design was insufficiently {robust}, this may
  cause it to fail in mysterious ways.

  For example, owing to endemic shortsightedness in the design of
  COBOL programs, most will succumb to software rot when their
  2-digit year counters {wrap around} at the beginning of the
  year 2000.  Actually, related lossages often afflict centenarians
  who have to deal with computer software designed by unimaginative
  clods.  One such incident became the focus of a minor public flap
  in 1990, when a gentleman born in 1889 applied for a driver's
  license renewal in Raleigh, North Carolina.  The new system
  refused to issue the card, probably because with 2-digit years the
  ages 101 and 1 cannot be distinguished.

  Historical note: Software rot in an even funnier sense than the
  mythical one was a real problem on early research computers (e.g.,
  the R1; see {grind crank}).  If a program that depended on a
  peculiar instruction hadn't been run in quite a while, the user
  might discover that the opcodes no longer did the same things they
  once did.  ("Hey, so-and-so needs an instruction to do
  such-and-such.  We can {snarf} this opcode, right?  No one uses
  it.")

  Another classic example of this sprang from the time an MIT hacker
  found a simple way to double the speed of the unconditional jump
  instruction on a PDP-6, so he patched the hardware.  Unfortunately,
  this broke some fragile timing software in a music-playing program,
  throwing its output out of tune.  This was fixed by adding a
  defensive initialization routine to compare the speed of a timing
  loop with the real-time clock; in other words, it figured out how
  fast the PDP-6 was that day, and corrected appropriately.

  Compare {bit rot}.

softwarily: /soft-weir'i-lee/ adv. In a way pertaining to software.
  "The system is softwarily unreliable."  The adjective
  `softwary' is *not* used.  See {hardwarily}.

softy: [IBM] n. Hardware hackers' term for a software expert who
  is largely ignorant of the mysteries of hardware.

some random X: adj. Used to indicate a member of class X, with the
  implication that Xs are interchangeable.  "I think some random
  cracker tripped over the guest timeout last night."  See also
  {J. Random}.

sorcerer's apprentice mode: [from the film "Fantasia"] n. A bug in a
  protocol where, under some circumstances, the receipt of a message
  causes multiple messages to be sent, each of which, when
  received, triggers the same bug.  Used esp. of such behavior
  caused by {bounce message} loops in {email} software.  Compare
  {broadcast storm}, {network meltdown}.

SOS: n.,obs. /S-O-S/ 1. An infamously {losing} text editor.
  Once, back in the 1960s, when a text editor was needed for the
  PDP-6, a hacker crufted together a {quick-and-dirty} `stopgap
  editor' to be used until a better one was written.  Unfortunately,
  the old one was never really discarded when new ones (in
  particular, {TECO}) came along.  SOS is a descendant (`Son of
  Stopgap') of that editor, and many PDP-10 users gained the dubious
  pleasure of its acquaintance.  Since then other programs similar in
  style to SOS have been written, notably the early font editor BILOS
  /bye'lohs/, the Brother-In-Law Of Stopgap (the alternate expansion
  `Bastard Issue, Loins of Stopgap' has been proposed).  2. /sos/
  n. To decrease; inverse of {AOS}, from the PDP-10 instruction
  set.

source of all good bits: n. A person from whom (or a place from
  which) useful information may be obtained.  If you need to know
  about a program, a {guru} might be the source of all good bits.
  The title is often applied to a particularly competent secretary.

space-cadet keyboard: n. The Knight keyboard, a now-legendary device
  used on MIT LISP machines, which inspired several still-current
  jargon terms and influenced the design of {EMACS}.  It was inspired
  by the Stanford keyboard and equipped with no fewer than
  *seven* shift keys: four keys for {bucky bits} (`control',
  `meta', `hyper', and `super') and three like regular shift keys,
  called `shift', `top', and `front'.  Many keys had three symbols
  on them: a letter and a symbol on the top, and a Greek letter on
  the front.  For example, the `L' key had an `L' and a two-way
  arrow on the top, and the Greek letter lambda on the front.  If you
  press this key with the right hand while playing an appropriate
  `chord' with the left hand on the shift keys, you can get the
  following results:

    L

         lowercase l

    shift-L

         uppercase L

    front-L

         lowercase lambda

    front-shift-L

         uppercase lambda

    top-L

         two-way arrow
         (front and shift are ignored)

  And of course each of these might also be typed with any
  combination of the control, meta, hyper, and super keys.  On this
  keyboard, you could type over 8000 different characters!  This
  allowed the user to type very complicated mathematical text, and
  also to have thousands of single-character commands at his
  disposal.  Many hackers were actually willing to memorize the
  command meanings of that many characters if it reduced typing time
  (this attitude obviously shaped the interface of EMACS).  Other
  hackers, however, thought having that many bucky bits was overkill,
  and objected that such a keyboard can require three or four hands
  to operate.  See {bucky bits}, {cokebottle}, {double bucky},
  {meta bit}, {quadruple bucky}.

SPACEWAR: n. A space-combat simulation game, inspired by
  E. E. "Doc" Smith's "Lensman" books, in which two spaceships
  duel around a central sun, shooting torpedoes at each other and
  jumping through hyperspace.  This game was first implemented on the
  PDP-1 at MIT in 1960--61.  SPACEWAR aficionados formed the core of
  the early hacker culture at MIT.  Nine years later, a descendant
  of the game motivated Ken Thompson to build, in his spare time on a
  scavenged PDP-7, the operating system that became {{UNIX}}.  Less
  than 9 years after that, SPACEWAR was commercialized as one of
  the first video games; descendants are still {feep}ing in video
  arcades everywhere.

spaghetti code: n. Code with a complex and tangled control
  structure, esp. one using many GOTOs, exceptions, or other
  `unstructured' branching constructs.  Pejorative.  The synonym
  `kangaroo code' has been reported, doubtless because such code
  has many jumps in it.

spaghetti inheritance: n. [encountered among users of object-oriented
  languages that use inheritance, such as Smalltalk] A convoluted
  class-subclass graph, often resulting from carelessly deriving
  subclasses from other classes just for the sake of reusing their
  code.  Coined in a (successful) attempt to discourage such
  practice, through guilt-by-association with {spaghetti code}.

spam: [from the {MUD} community] vt. To crash a program by overrunning
  a fixed-size buffer with excessively large input data.  See also
  {buffer overflow}, {overrun screw}, {smash the stack}.

special-case: vt. To write unique code to handle input to or
  situations arising in program that are somehow distinguished from
  normal processing.  This would be used for processing of mode
  switches or interrupt characters in an interactive interface (as
  opposed, say, to text entry or normal commands), or for processing
  of {hidden flag}s in the input of a batch program or {filter}.

speedometer: n. A pattern of lights displayed on a linear set of
  LEDs (today) or nixie tubes (yesterday, on ancient mainframes).  The
  pattern is shifted left every N times the software goes
  through its main loop.  A swiftly moving pattern indicates that the
  system is mostly idle; the speedometer slows down as the system
  becomes overloaded.  The speedometer on Sun Microsystems hardware
  bounces back and forth like the eyes on one of the Cylons from the
  wretched "Battlestar Galactica" TV series.

  Historical note: One computer, the Honeywell 6000 (later GE 600)
  actually had an *analog* speedometer on the front panel,
  calibrated in instructions executed per second.

spell: n. Syn. {incantation}.

spiffy: /spi'fee/ adj. 1. Said of programs having a pretty,
  clever, or exceptionally well-designed interface. "Have you seen
  the spiffy {X} version of {empire} yet?"  2. Said
  sarcastically of a program that is perceived to have little more
  than a flashy interface going for it.  Which meaning should be
  drawn depends delicately on tone of voice and context.  This word
  was common mainstream slang during the 1940s, in a sense close to #1.

spin: vi. Equivalent to {buzz}.  More common among C and UNIX
  programmers.

spl: /S-P-L/ [abbrev, from Set Priority Level] The way
  traditional UNIX kernels implement mutual exclusion by running code
  at high interrupt levels.  Used in jargon to describe the act of
  tuning in or tuning out ordinary communication.  Classically, spl
  levels run from 1 to 7; "Fred's at spl 6 today." would mean
  that he is very hard to interrupt.  "Wait till I finish this; I'll
  spl down then."  See also {interrupts locked out}.

splat: n. 1. Name used in many places (DEC, IBM, and others) for
  the asterisk (`*') character (ASCII 0101010).  This may derive
  from the `squashed-bug' appearance of the asterisk on many early
  line printers.  2. [MIT] Name used by some people for the
  `#' character (ASCII 0100011).  3. [Rochester Institute of
  Technology] The {command key} on a Mac (same as {ALT},
  sense 2).  4. [Stanford] Name used by some people for the
  Stanford/ITS extended ASCII
  circle-x
  character.  This character is also called `blobby' and `frob',
  among other names; it is sometimes used by mathematicians as a
  notation for `tensor product'.  5. [Stanford] Name for the
  semi-mythical extended ASCII
  circle-plus

  character.  6. Canonical name for an output routine that outputs
  whatever the local interpretation of `splat' is.

  With ITS and WAITS gone, senses 4--6 are now nearly obsolete.  See
  also {{ASCII}}.

sponge: [UNIX] n. A special case of a {filter} that reads its
  entire input before writing any output; the canonical example is a
  sort utility.  Unlike most filters, a sponge can conveniently
  overwrite the input file with the output data stream.  If your file
  system has versioning (as ITS did and VMS does now) the
  sponge/filter distinction loses its usefulness, because directing
  filter output would just write a new version.  See also {slurp}.

spooge: /spooj/ 1. n. Inexplicable or arcane code, or random
  and probably incorrect output from a computer program.  2. vi. To
  generate spooge (sense 1).

spool: [from early IBM `Simultaneous Peripheral Operation Off-Line',
  but this acronym is widely thought to have been contrived for
  effect] vt. To send files to some device or program (a `spooler')
  that queues them up and does something useful with them later.  The
  spooler usually understood is the `print spooler' controlling
  output of jobs to a printer, but the term has been used in
  connection with other peripherals (especially plotters and graphics
  devices).  See also {demon}.

stack: n. A person's stack is the set of things he or she has to do
  in the future.  One speaks of the next project to be attacked as
  having risen to the top of the stack.  "I'm afraid I've got real
  work to do, so this'll have to be pushed way down on my stack."
  "I haven't done it yet because every time I pop my stack something
  new gets pushed."  If you are interrupted several times in the
  middle of a conversation, "My stack overflowed" means "I
  forget what we were talking about."  The implication is that more
  items were pushed onto the stack than could be remembered, so the
  least recent items were lost.  The usual physical example of a
  stack is to be found in a cafeteria: a pile of plates or trays
  sitting on a spring in a well, so that when you put one on the top
  they all sink down, and when you take one off the top the rest
  spring up a bit.  See also {push} and {pop}.

  At MIT, {pdl} used to be a more common synonym for {stack} in
  all these contexts, and this may still be true.  Everywhere else
  {stack} seems to be the preferred term.  {Knuth}
  (`The Art of Computer Programming', second edition, vol. 1,
  p. 236) says:

       Many people who realized the importance of stacks and queues
       independently have given other names to these structures:
       stacks have been called push-down lists, reversion storages,
       cellars, nesting stores, piles, last-in-first-out ("LIFO")
       lists, and even yo-yo lists!

stack puke: n. Some processor architectures are said to `puke their
  guts onto the stack' to save their internal state during exception
  processing.  The Motorola 68020, for example, regurgitates up to
  92 bytes on a bus fault.  On a pipelined machine, this can take a
  while.

stale pointer bug: n. Synonym for {aliasing bug} used esp. among
  microcomputer hackers.

state: n. 1. Condition, situation.  "What's the state of your
  latest hack?"  "It's winning away."  "The system tried to read
  and write the disk simultaneously and got into a totally wedged
  state."  The standard question "What's your state?"  means
  "What are you doing?" or "What are you about to do?"  Typical
  answers are "about to gronk out", or "hungry".  Another
  standard question is "What's the state of the world?", meaning
  "What's new?" or "What's going on?".  The more terse and
  humorous way of asking these questions would be "State-p?".
  Another way of phrasing the first question under sense 1 would be
  "state-p latest hack?".  2. Information being maintained in
  non-permanent memory (electronic or human).

steam-powered: adj. Old-fashioned or underpowered; archaic.  This
  term does not have a strong negative loading and may even be used
  semi-affectionately for something that clanks and wheezes a lot
  but hangs in there doing the job.

stiffy: [University of Lowell,  Massachusetts.] n. 3.5-inch
  {microfloppies}, so called because their jackets are more firm
  than those of the 5.25-inch and the 8-inch floppy.  Elsewhere this might be
  called a `firmy'.

stir-fried random: alt. `stir-fried mumble' n. Term used for the
  best dish of many of those hackers who can cook.  Consists of
  random fresh veggies and meat wokked with random spices.  Tasty and
  economical.  See {random}, {great-wall}, {ravs}, {{laser
  chicken}}, {{oriental food}}; see also {mumble}.

stomp on: vt. To inadvertently overwrite something important, usually
  automatically.  "All the work I did this weekend got
  stomped on last night by the nightly server script."  Compare
  {scribble}, {mangle}, {trash}, {scrog}, {roach}.

Stone Age: n., adj. 1. In computer folklore, an ill-defined period
  from ENIAC (ca. 1943) to the mid-1950s; the great age of
  electromechanical {dinosaur}s.  Sometimes used for the entire
  period up to 1960--61 (see {Iron Age}); however, it is funnier
  and more descriptive to characterize the latter period in terms of
  a `Bronze Age' era of transistor-logic, pre-ferrite-{core}
  machines with drum or CRT mass storage (as opposed to just mercury
  delay lines and/or relays).  See also {Iron Age}.  2. More
  generally, a pejorative for any crufty, ancient piece of hardware
  or software technology.  Note that this is used even by people who
  were there for the {Stone Age} (sense 1).

stoppage: /sto'p*j/ n. Extreme {lossage} that renders
  something (usually something vital) completely unusable.  "The
  recent system stoppage was caused by a {fried} transformer."

store: [prob. from techspeak `main store'] n. Preferred Commonwealth
  synonym for {core}.  Thus, `bringing a program into store' means
  not that one is returning shrink-wrapped software but that a
  program is being {swap}ped in.

stroke: n. Common name for the slant (`/', ASCII 0101111)
  character.  See {ASCII} for other synonyms.

strudel: n. Common (spoken) name for the circumflex (`', ASCII
  1000000) character.  See {ASCII} for other synonyms.

stubroutine: /stuhb'roo-teen/ [contraction of `stub routine']
  n.  Tiny, often vacuous placeholder for a subroutine that is to be
  written or fleshed out later.

studlycaps: /stuhd'lee-kaps/ n. A hackish form of silliness
  similar to {BiCapitalization} for trademarks, but applied
  randomly and to arbitrary text rather than to trademarks.  ThE
  oRigiN and SigNificaNce of thIs pRacTicE iS oBscuRe.

stunning: adj. Mind-bogglingly stupid.  Usually used in sarcasm.
  "You want to code *what* in ADA?  That's ... a stunning
  idea!"

stupid-sort: n. Syn. {bogo-sort}.

subshell: /suhb'shel/ [UNIX, MS-DOS] n. An OS command interpreter
  (see {shell}) spawned from within a program, such that exit from
  the command interpreter returns one to the parent program in a
  state that allows it to continue execution.  Compare {shell out};
  oppose {chain}.

sucking mud: [Applied Data Research] adj. (also `pumping
  mud') Crashed or wedged.  Usually said of a machine that provides
  some service to a network, such as a file server.  This Dallas
  regionalism derives from the East Texas oilfield lament, "Shut
  'er down, Ma, she's a-suckin' mud".  Often used as a query.  "We
  are going to reconfigure the network, are you ready to suck mud?"

sufficiently small: adj. Syn. {suitably small}.

suit: n. 1. Ugly and uncomfortable `business clothing' often worn
  by non-hackers.  Invariably worn with a `tie', a strangulation
  device that partially cuts off the blood supply to the brain.  It
  is thought that this explains much about the behavior of
  suit-wearers.  Compare {droid}.  2. A person who habitually wears
  suits, as distinct from a techie or hacker.  See {loser},
  {burble}, {management}, and {brain-damaged}.  English, by the
  way, is relatively kind; our Soviet correspondent informs us that
  the corresponding idiom in Russian hacker jargon is `sovok', lit.
  a tool for grabbing garbage.

suitable win: n. See {win}.

suitably small: [perverted from mathematical jargon] adj. An
  expression used ironically to characterize unquantifiable
  behavior that differs from expected or required behavior.  For
  example, suppose a newly created program came up with a correct
  full-screen display, and one publicly exclaimed: "It works!"
  Then, if the program dumps core on the first mouse click, one might
  add: "Well, for suitably small values of `works'."  Compare
  the characterization of pi under {{random numbers}}.

sun-stools: n. Unflattering hackerism for SunTools, a pre-X
  windowing environment notorious in its day for size, slowness, and
  misfeatures.  {X}, however, is larger and slower; see
  {second-system effect}.

sunspots: n. 1. Notional cause of an odd error.  "Why did the
  program suddenly turn the screen blue?"  "Sunspots, I guess."
  2. Also the cause of {bit rot} --- from the myth that sunspots
  will increase {cosmic rays}, which can flip single bits in memory.
  See {cosmic rays}, {phase of the moon}.

superprogrammer: n. A prolific programmer; one who can code
  exceedingly well and quickly.  Not all hackers are
  superprogrammers, but many are.  (Productivity can vary from one
  programmer to another by three orders of magnitude.  For example,
  one programmer might be able to write an average of 3 lines of
  working code in one day, while another, with the proper tools,
  might be able to write 3,000.  This range is astonishing; it is
  matched in very few other areas of human endeavor.)  The term
  `superprogrammer' is more commonly used within such places as IBM
  than in the hacker community.  It tends to stress na"ive measures
  of productivity and to underweight creativity, ingenuity, and
  getting the job *done* --- and to sidestep the question of
  whether the 3,000 lines of code do more or less useful work than
  three lines that do the {Right Thing}.  Hackers tend to prefer
  the terms {hacker} and {wizard}.

superuser: [UNIX] n. Syn. {root}, {avatar}.  This usage has
  spread to non-UNIX environments; the superuser is any account with
  all {wheel} bits on.  A more specific term than {wheel}.

support: n. After-sale handholding; something many software
  vendors promise but few deliver.  To hackers, most support people
  are useless --- because by the time a hacker calls support he or
  she will usually know the relevant manuals better than the support
  people (sadly, this is *not* a joke or exaggeration).  A
  hacker's idea of `support' is a t^ete-`a-t^ete with the
  software's designer.

Suzie COBOL: /soo'zee koh'bol/ 1. [IBM: prob. from Frank Zappa's
  `Suzy Creamcheese'] n. A coder straight out of training school who
  knows everything except the value of comments in plain English.
  Also (fashionable among personkind wishing to avoid accusations of
  sexism) `Sammy Cobol' or (in some non-IBM circles) `Cobol Charlie'.
  2. [proposed] Meta-name for any {code grinder}, analogous to
  {J. Random Hacker}.

swab: /swob/ [From the mnemonic for the PDP-11 `SWAp Byte'
  instruction, as immortalized in the `dd(1)' option `conv=swab'
  (see {dd})] 1. vt. To solve the {NUXI problem} by swapping
  bytes in a file.  2. n. The program in V7 UNIX used to perform this
  action, or anything functionally equivalent to it.  See also
  {big-endian}, {little-endian}, {middle-endian},
  {bytesexual}.

swap: vt. 1. [techspeak] To move information from a fast-access
  memory to a slow-access memory (`swap out'), or vice versa
  (`swap in').  Often refers specifically to the use of disks as
  `virtual memory'.  As pieces of data or program are needed, they
  are swapped into {core} for processing; when they are no longer
  needed they may be swapped out again.  2. The jargon use of these
  terms analogizes people's short-term memories with core.  Cramming
  for an exam might be spoken of as swapping in.  If you temporarily
  forget someone's name, but then remember it, your excuse is that it
  was swapped out.  To `keep something swapped in' means to keep it
  fresh in your memory: "I reread the TECO manual every few months
  to keep it swapped in."  If someone interrupts you just as you got
  a good idea, you might say "Wait a moment while I swap this
  out", implying that the piece of paper is your extra-somatic
  memory and if you don't swap the info out by writing it down it
  will get overwritten and lost as you talk.  Compare {page in},
  {page out}.

swap space: n. Storage space, especially temporary storage space
  used during a move or reconfiguration.  "I'm just using that corner
  of the machine room for swap space."

swapped in: n. See {swap}.  See also {page in}.

swapped out: n. See {swap}.  See also {page out}.

swizzle: v. To convert external names, array indices, or references
  within a data structure into address pointers when the data
  structure is brought into main memory from external storage (also
  called `pointer swizzling'); this may be done for speed in
  chasing references or to simplify code (e.g., by turning lots of
  name lookups into pointer dereferences).  The converse operation is
  sometimes termed `unswizzling'.  See also {snap}.

sync: /sink/ (var. `synch') n., vi. 1. To synchronize, to
  bring into synchronization.  2. [techspeak] To force all pending
  I/O to the disk; see {flush}, sense 2.  3. More generally, to
  force a number of competing processes or agents to a state that
  would be `safe' if the system were to crash; thus, to checkpoint
  (in the database-theory sense).

syntactic sugar: [coined by Peter Landin] n. Features added to a
  language or other formalism to make it `sweeter' for humans,
  that do not affect the expressiveness of the formalism (compare
  {chrome}).  Used esp. when there is an obvious and trivial
  translation of the `sugar' feature into other constructs already
  present in the notation.  C's `a[i]' notation is syntactic
  sugar for `*(a + i)'.  "Syntactic sugar causes cancer of the
  semicolon."  --- Alan Perlis

  The variant `syntactic saccharine' is also recorded.  This
  denotes something even more gratuitous, in that syntactic sugar
  serves a purpose (making something more acceptable to humans) but
  syntactic saccharine serves no purpose at all.

sys-frog: /sis'frog/ [the PLATO system] n. Playful variant of
  `sysprog', which is in turn short for `systems programmer'.

sysadmin: /sis'ad-min/ n. Common contraction of `system
  admin'; see {admin}.

sysop: /sis'op/ n. [esp. in the BBS world] The operator (and
  usually the owner) of a bulletin-board system.  A common neophyte
  mistake on {FidoNet} is to address a message to `sysop' in an
  international {echo}, thus sending it to hundreds of sysops
  around the world.

system: n. 1. The supervisor program or OS on a computer.  2. The
  entire computer system, including input/output devices, the
  supervisor program or OS, and possibly other software.  3. Any
  large-scale program.  4. Any method or algorithm.  5. `System
  hacker': one who hacks the system (in senses 1 and 2 only; for
  sense 3 one mentions the particular program: e.g., `LISP
  hacker')

systems jock: n. See {jock}, (sense 2).

SysVile: /sis-vi:l'/ n. See {Missed'em-five}.

system mangler: n. Humorous synonym for `system manager', poss.
  from the fact that one major IBM OS had a {root} account called
  SYSMANGR.  Refers specifically to a systems programmer in charge of
  administration, software maintenance, and updates at some site.
  Unlike {admin}, this term emphasizes the technical end of the
  skills involved.

= T =
=====

T: /T/ 1. [from LISP terminology for `true'] Yes.  Used in
  reply to a question (particularly one asked using the `-P'
  convention).  In LISP, the constant T means `true', among other
  things.  Some hackers use `T' and `NIL' instead of `Yes' and `No'
  almost reflexively.  This sometimes causes misunderstandings.  When
  a waiter or flight attendant asks whether a hacker wants coffee, he
  may well respond `T', meaning that he wants coffee; but of course
  he will be brought a cup of tea instead.  As it happens, most
  hackers (particularly those who frequent Chinese restaurants) like
  tea at least as well as coffee --- so it is not that big a problem.
  2. See {time T} (also {since time T equals minus infinity}).
  3. [techspeak] In transaction-processing circles, an abbreviation
  for the noun `transaction'.  4. [Purdue] Alternate spelling of
  {tee}.

tail recursion: n. If you aren't sick of it already, see {tail
  recursion}.

talk mode: n. A feature supported by UNIX, ITS, and some other
  OSes that allows two or more logged-in users to set up a real-time
  on-line conversation.  It combines the immediacy of talking with
  all the precision (and verbosity) that written language entails.
  It is difficult to communicate inflection, though conventions have
  arisen for some of these (see the section on writing style in the
  Prependices for details).

  Talk mode has a special set of jargon words, used to save typing,
  which are not used orally.  Some of these are identical to (and
  probably derived from) Morse-code jargon used by ham-radio amateurs
  since the 1920s.

    `BCNU'

         be seeing you
    `BTW'
         by the way
    `BYE?'
         are you ready to unlink?  (this is the standard way to end a talk-mode
         conversation; the other person types `BYE' to confirm, or else continues
         the conversation)
    `CUL'

         see you later
    `ENQ?'
         are you busy?  (expects `ACK' or `NAK' in return)
    `FOO?'
         are you there? (often used on unexpected links,
         meaning also "Sorry if I butted in ..." (linker) or "What's
         up?" (linkee))
    `FYI'

         for your information
    `FYA'

         for your amusement
    `GA'
         go ahead  (used when two people have tried to type simultaneously; this
         cedes the right to type to the other)
    `GRMBL'

         grumble (expresses disquiet or disagreement)
    `HELLOP'
         hello? (an instance of the `-P' convention)
    `JAM'
         just a minute (equivalent to `SEC....')
    `MIN'

         same as `JAM'
    `NIL'

         no (see {NIL})
    `O'
         over to you
    `OO'

         over and out
    `/'
         another form of "over to you" (from x/y as "x over y")
    `\'
         lambda (used in discussing LISPy things)
    `OBTW'

         oh, by the way
    `R U THERE?'
         are you there?
    `SEC'

         wait a second (sometimes written `SEC...')
    `T'
         yes (see the main entry for {T})
    `TNX'

         thanks
    `TNX 1.0E6'
         thanks a million (humorous)
    `TNXE6'
         another for of "thanks a million"
    `WRT'

         with regard to, or with respect to.
    `WTF'
         the universal interrogative particle; WTF knows what it means?
    `WTH'

         what the hell?
    `<double newline>'
         When the typing party has finished, he/she types two newlines to
         signal that he/she is done; this leaves a blank line between
         `speeches' in the conversation, making it easier to reread the
         preceding text.
    `<name>:'
         When three or more terminals are linked, it is conventional for each
         typist to {prepend} his/her login name or handle and a colon
         (or a hyphen) to each line to indicate who is typing (some
         conferencing facilities do this automatically).  The login name
         is often shortened to a unique prefix (possibly a single letter)
         during a very long conversation.
    `/\/\/\'
         A giggle or chuckle.  On a MUD, this usually means `earthquake fault'.

  Most of the above sub-jargon is used at both Stanford and MIT.
  Several of these expressions are also common in {email}, esp.
  FYI, FYA, BTW, BCNU, WTF, and CUL.  A few other abbreviations have
  been reported from commercial networks, such as GEnie and CompuServe,
  where on-line `live' chat including more than two people is
  common and usually involves a more `social' context, notably the
  following:

    `<g>'
         grin
    `<gr&d>'
         grinning, running, and ducking
    `BBL'
         be back later
    `BRB'
         be right back
    `HHOJ'
         ha ha only joking
    `HHOK'
         ha ha only kidding
    `HHOS'
         {ha ha only serious}
    `IMHO'
         in my humble opinion (see {IMHO})
    `LOL'
         laughing out loud
    `ROTF'
         rolling on the floor
    `ROTFL'
         rolling on the floor laughing
    `AFK'
         away from keyboard
    `b4'
         before
    `CU l8tr'
         see you later
    `MORF'
         male or female?
    `TTFN'
         ta-ta for now
    `OIC'
         oh, I see
    `rehi'
         hello again

  Most of these are not used at universities or in the UNIX world,
  though ROTF and TTFN have gained some currency there and IMHO is
  common; conversely, most of the people who know these are
  unfamiliar with FOO?, BCNU, HELLOP, {NIL}, and {T}.

  The {MUD} community uses a mixture of USENET/Internet emoticons, a
  few of the more natural of the old-style talk-mode abbrevs, and
  some of the `social' list above; specifically, MUD respondents
  report use of BBL, BRB, LOL, b4, BTW, WTF, TTFN, and WTH.  The use of
  `rehi' is also common; in fact, mudders are fond of re- compounds and
  will frequently `rehug' or `rebonk' (see {bonk/oif}) people.  The
  word `re' by itself is taken as `regreet'.  In general, though,
  MUDders express a preference for typing things out in full rather
  than using abbreviations; this may be due to the relative youth of
  the MUD cultures, which tend to include many touch typists and
  to assume high-speed links.  The following uses specific to MUDs are
  reported:

    `UOK?'
         are you OK?
    `THX'
         thanks (mutant of `TNX'; clearly this comes in batches of 1138 (the
         Lucasian K)).
    `CU l8er'
         see you later (mutant of `CU l8tr')
    `OTT'
         over the top (excessive, uncalled for)

  Some {BIFF}isms (notably the variant spelling `d00d')
  appear to be passing into wider use among some subgroups of
  MUDders.

  One final note on talk mode style: neophytes, when in talk mode,
  often seem to think they must produce letter-perfect prose because
  they are typing rather than speaking.  This is not the best
  approach.  It can be very frustrating to wait while your partner
  pauses to think of a word, or repeatedly makes the same spelling
  error and backs up to fix it.  It is usually best just to leave
  typographical errors behind and plunge forward, unless severe
  confusion may result; in that case it is often fastest just to type
  "xxx" and start over from before the mistake.

  See also {hakspek}, {emoticon}, {bonk/oif}.

talker system: n. British hackerism for software that enables
  real-time chat or {talk mode}.

tall card: n. A PC/AT-size expansion card (these can be larger
  than IBM PC or XT cards because the AT case is bigger).  See also
  {short card}.  When IBM introduced the PS/2 model 30 (its last
  gasp at supporting the ISA) they made the case lower and many
  industry-standard tall cards wouldn't fit; this was felt to be a
  reincarnation of the {connector conspiracy}, done with less
  style.

tanked: adj. Same as {down}, used primarily by UNIX hackers.  See
  also {hosed}.  Popularized as a synonym for `drunk' by Steve
  Dallas in the late lamented "Bloom County" comic strip.

tar and feather: [from UNIX `tar(1)'] vt. To create a
  transportable archive from a group of files by first sticking them
  together with `tar(1)' (the Tape ARchiver) and then
  compressing the result (see {compress}).  The latter action is
  dubbed `feathering' by analogy to what you do with an airplane
  propeller to decrease wind resistance, or with an oar to reduce
  water resistance; smaller files, after all, slip through comm links
  more easily.

taste: [primarily MIT] n. 1. The quality in a program that tends
  to be inversely proportional to the number of features, hacks, and
  kluges programmed into it.  Also `tasty', `tasteful',
  `tastefulness'.  "This feature comes in N tasty flavors."
  Although `tasteful' and `flavorful' are essentially
  synonyms, `taste' and {flavor} are not.  Taste refers to
  sound judgment on the part of the creator; a program or feature
  can *exhibit* taste but cannot {have} taste.  On the other
  hand, a feature can have {flavor}.  Also, {flavor} has the
  additional meaning of `kind' or `variety' not shared by
  `taste'.  {Flavor} is a more popular word than `taste',
  though both are used.  See also {elegant}.  2. Alt. sp. of
  {tayste}.

tayste: /tayst/ n. Two bits; also as {taste}.  Syn. {crumb},
  {quarter}.  Compare {{byte}}, {dynner}, {playte},
  {nybble}, {quad}.

TCB: /T-C-B/ [IBM] n. 1. Trouble Came Back.  An intermittent or
  difficult-to-reproduce problem that has failed to respond to
  neglect.  Compare {heisenbug}.  Not to be confused with:
  2. Trusted Computing Base, an `official' jargon term from the
  {Orange Book}.

tea, ISO standard cup of: [South Africa] n. A cup of tea with milk
  and one teaspoon of sugar, where the milk is poured into the cup
  before the tea.  Variations are ISO 0, with no sugar; ISO 2, with
  two spoons of sugar; and so on.

  Like many ISO standards, this one has a faintly alien ring in North
  America, where hackers generally shun the decadent British practice
  of adulterating perfectly good tea with dairy products and
  prefer instead to add a wedge of lemon, if anything.  If one were
  feeling extremely silly, one might hypothesize an analogous `ANSI
  standard cup of tea' and wind up with a political situation
  distressingly similar to several that arise in much more serious
  technical contexts.  Milk and lemon don't mix very well.

TechRef: /tek'ref/ [MS-DOS] n. The original `IBM PC
  Technical Reference Manual', including the BIOS listing and
  complete schematics for the PC.  The only PC documentation in the
  issue package that's considered serious by real hackers.

TECO: /tee'koh/ obs. 1. vt. Originally, to edit using the TECO
  editor in one of its infinite variations (see below).  2. vt.,obs.
  To edit even when TECO is *not* the editor being used!  This
  usage is rare and now primarily historical.  2. [originally an
  acronym for `[paper] Tape Editor and COrrector'; later, `Text
  Editor and COrrector'] n. A text editor developed at MIT and
  modified by just about everybody.  With all the dialects included,
  TECO might have been the most prolific editor in use before
  {EMACS}, to which it was directly ancestral.  Noted for its
  powerful programming-language-like features and its unspeakably
  hairy syntax.  It is literally the case that every string of
  characters is a valid TECO program (though probably not a useful
  one); one common hacker game used to be mentally working out what
  the TECO commands corresponding to human names did.  As an example
  of TECO's obscurity, here is a TECO program that takes a list of
  names such as:

    Loser, J. Random
    Quux, The Great
    Dick, Moby

  sorts them alphabetically according to surname, and then puts the
  surname last, removing the comma, to produce the following:

    Moby Dick
    J. Random Loser
    The Great Quux

  The program is

    [1 J^P$L$$
    J <.-Z; .,(S,$ -D .)FX1 @F^B $K :L I $ G1 L>$$

  (where ^B means `Control-B' (ASCII 0000010) and $ is actually
  an {ALT} or escape (ASCII 0011011) character).

  In fact, this very program was used to produce the second, sorted
  list from the first list.  The first hack at it had a {bug}: GLS
  (the author) had accidentally omitted the `@' in front
  of `F^B', which as anyone can see is clearly the {Wrong Thing}.  It
  worked fine the second time.  There is no space to describe all the
  features of TECO, but it may be of interest that `^P' means
  `sort' and `J<.-Z; ... L>' is an idiomatic series of commands
  for `do once for every line'.

  In mid-1991, TECO is pretty much one with the dust of history,
  having been replaced in the affections of hackerdom by {EMACS}.
  Descendants of an early (and somewhat lobotomized) version adopted
  by DEC can still be found lurking on VMS and a couple of crufty
  PDP-11 operating systems, however, and ports of the more advanced
  MIT versions remain the focus of some antiquarian interest.  See
  also {retrocomputing}, {write-only language}.

tee: n.,vt. [Purdue] A carbon copy of an electronic transmission.
  "Oh, you're sending him the {bits} to that?  Slap on a tee for
  me."  From the UNIX command `tee(1)', itself named after a
  pipe fitting (see {plumbing}).  Can also mean `save one for me',
  as in "Tee a slice for me!"  Also spelled `T'.

Telerat: /tel'*-rat/ n. Unflattering hackerism for `Teleray', a
  line of extremely losing terminals.  See also {terminak},
  {sun-stools}, {HP-SUX}.

TELNET: /tel'net/ vt. To communicate with another Internet host
  using the {TELNET} program.  TOPS-10 people used the word
  IMPCOM, since that was the program name for them.  Sometimes
  abbreviated to TN /T-N/.  "I usually TN over to SAIL just to
  read the AP News."

ten-finger interface: n. The interface between two networks that
  cannot be directly connected for security reasons; refers to the
  practice of placing two terminals side by side and having an
  operator read from one and type into the other.

tense: adj. Of programs, very clever and efficient.  A tense piece
  of code often got that way because it was highly {bum}med, but
  sometimes it was just based on a great idea.  A comment in a clever
  routine by Mike Kazar, once a grad-student hacker at CMU: "This
  routine is so tense it will bring tears to your eyes."  A tense
  programmer is one who produces tense code.

tenured graduate student: n. One who has been in graduate school
  for 10 years (the usual maximum is 5 or 6): a `ten-yeared'
  student (get it?).  Actually, this term may be used of any grad
  student beginning in his seventh year.  Students don't really get
  tenure, of course, the way professors do, but a tenth-year graduate
  student has probably been around the university longer than any
  untenured professor.

tera-: /te'r*/ [SI] pref. See {{quantifiers}}.

teraflop club: /te'r*-flop kluhb/ [FLOP = Floating Point
  Operation] n. A mythical association of people who consume outrageous
  amounts of computer time in order to produce a few simple pictures
  of glass balls with intricate ray-tracing techniques.  Caltech
  professor James Kajiya is said to have been the founder.

terminak: /ter'mi-nak`/ [Caltech, ca. 1979] n. Any malfunctioning
  computer terminal.  A common failure mode of Lear-Siegler ADM 3a
  terminals caused the `L' key to produce the `K' code instead;
  complaints about this tended to look like "Terminak #3 has a bad
  keyboard.  Pkease fix."  See {sun-stools}, {Telerat},
  {HP-SUX}.

terminal brain death: n. The extreme form of {terminal illness}
  (sense 1).  What someone who has obviously been hacking
  continuously for far too long is said to be suffering from.

terminal illness: n. 1. Syn. {raster burn}.  2. The `burn-in'
  condition your CRT tends to get if you don't have a screen saver.

terminal junkie: [UK] n. A {wannabee} or early
  {larval stage} hacker who spends most of his or her time wandering
  the directory tree and writing {noddy} programs just to get
  a fix of computer time.  Variants include `terminal
  jockey', `console junkie', and {console jockey}.  The term
  `console jockey' seems to imply more expertise than the other
  three (possibly because of the exalted status of the {{console}}
  relative to an ordinary terminal).  See also {twink},
  {read-only user}.

terpri: /ter'pree/ [from LISP 1.5 (and later, MacLISP)] vi. To
  output a {newline}.  Now rare as jargon, though still used as
  techspeak in Common LISP.  It is a contraction of `TERminate PRInt
  line', named for the fact that, on early OSes, no characters would be
  printed until a complete line was formed, so this operation
  terminated the line and emitted the output.

test: n. 1. Real users bashing on a prototype long enough to get
  thoroughly acquainted with it, with careful monitoring and followup
  of the results.  2. Some bored random user trying a couple of the
  simpler features with a developer looking over his or her shoulder,
  ready to pounce on mistakes.  Judging by the quality of most
  software, the second definition is far more prevalent.  See also
  {demo}.

TeX: /tekh/ n. An extremely powerful {macro}-based
  text formatter written by Donald E. Knuth, very popular in the
  computer-science community (it is good enough to have displaced
  UNIX `troff(1)', the other favored formatter, even at many
  UNIX installations).  TeX fans insist on the correct (guttural)
  pronunciation, and the correct spelling (all caps, squished
  together, with the E depressed below the baseline; the
  mixed-case `TeX' is considered an acceptable kluge on ASCII-only
  devices).  Fans like to proliferate names from the word `TeX'
  --- such as TeXnician (TeX user), TeXhacker (TeX
  programmer), TeXmaster (competent TeX programmer), TeXhax,
  and TeXnique.

  Knuth began TeX because he had become annoyed at the declining
  quality of the typesetting in volumes I--III of his monumental
  `Art of Computer Programming' (see {bible}).  In a
  manifestation of the typical hackish urge to solve the problem at
  hand once and for all, he began to design his own typesetting
  language.  He thought he would finish it on his sabbatical in 1978;
  he was wrong by only about 8 years.  The language was finally
  frozen around 1985, but volume IV of `The Art of Computer
  Programming' has yet to appear as of mid-1991.  The impact and
  influence of TeX's design has been such that nobody minds this
  very much.  Many grand hackish projects have started as a bit of
  tool-building on the way to something else; Knuth's diversion was
  simply on a grander scale than most.

text: n. 1. [techspeak] Executable code, esp. a `pure code'
  portion shared between multiple instances of a program running in a
  multitasking OS (compare {English}).  2. Textual material in the
  mainstream sense; data in ordinary {{ASCII}} or {{EBCDIC}}
  representation (see {flat-ASCII}).  "Those are text files;
  you can review them using the editor."  These two contradictory
  senses confuse hackers, too.

thanks in advance: [USENET] Conventional net.politeness ending a
  posted request for information or assistance.  Sometimes written
  `advTHANKSance' or `aTdHvAaNnKcSe' or abbreviated `TIA'.  See
  {net.-}, {netiquette}.

the X that can be Y is not the true X: Yet another instance of
  hackerdom's peculiar attraction to mystical references --- a common
  humorous way of making exclusive statements about a class of
  things.  The template is from the `Tao te Ching': "The
  Tao which can be spoken of is not the true Tao."  The implication
  is often that the X is a mystery accessible only to the
  enlightened.  See the {trampoline} entry for an example, and
  compare {has the X nature}.

theology: n. 1. Ironically or humorously used to refer to
  {religious issues}.  2. Technical fine points of an abstruse
  nature, esp. those where the resolution is of theoretical
  interest but is relatively {marginal} with respect to actual use of
  a design or system.  Used esp. around software issues with a
  heavy AI or language-design component, such as the smart-data vs.
  smart-programs dispute in AI.

theory: n. The consensus, idea, plan, story, or set of rules that
  is currently being used to inform a behavior.  This is a
  generalization and abuse of the technical meaning.  "What's the
  theory on fixing this TECO loss?"  "What's the theory on dinner
  tonight?"  ("Chinatown, I guess.")  "What's the current theory
  on letting lusers on during the day?"  "The theory behind this
  change is to fix the following well-known screw...."

thinko: /thing'koh/ [by analogy with `typo'] n. A momentary,
  correctable glitch in mental processing, especially one involving
  recall of information learned by rote; a bubble in the stream of
  consciousness.  Syn. {braino}.  Compare {mouso}.

This time, for sure!: excl. Ritual affirmation frequently uttered
  during protracted debugging sessions involving numerous small
  obstacles (e.g., attempts to bring up a UUCP connection).  For the
  proper effect, this must be uttered in a fruity imitation of
  Bullwinkle J. Moose.  Also heard: "Hey, Rocky!  Watch me pull a
  rabbit out of my hat!"  The {canonical} response is, of course,
  "But that trick *never* works!"  See {{Humor, Hacker}}.

thrash: vi. To move wildly or violently, without accomplishing
  anything useful.  Paging or swapping systems that are overloaded
  waste most of their time moving data into and out of core (rather
  than performing useful computation) and are therefore said to
  thrash.  Someone who keeps changing his mind (esp. about what to
  work on next) is said to be thrashing.  A person frantically trying
  to execute too many tasks at once (and not spending enough time on
  any single task) may also be described as thrashing.  Compare
  {multitask}.

thread: n. [USENET, GEnie, CompuServe] Common abbreviation of
  `topic thread', a more or less continuous chain of postings on a
  single topic.

three-finger salute: n. Syn. {Vulcan nerve pinch}.

thud: n. 1. Yet another meta-syntactic variable (see {foo}).
  It is reported that at CMU from the mid-1970s the canonical series of
  these was `foo', `bar', `thud', `blat'.  2. Rare term
  for the hash character, `#' (ASCII 0100011).  See {ASCII} for
  other synonyms.

thunk: /thuhnk/ n. 1. "A piece of coding which provides an
  address", according to P. Z. Ingerman, who invented thunks
  in 1961 as a way of binding actual parameters to their formal
  definitions in Algol-60 procedure calls.  If a procedure is called
  with an expression in the place of a formal parameter, the compiler
  generates a {thunk} to compute the expression and leave the
  address of the result in some standard location.  2. Later
  generalized into: an expression, frozen together with its
  environment, for later evaluation if and when needed (similar to
  what in techspeak is called a `closure').  The process of
  unfreezing these thunks is called `forcing'.  3. A
  {stubroutine}, in an overlay programming environment, that loads
  and jumps to the correct overlay.  Compare {trampoline}.
  4. People and activities scheduled in a thunklike manner.  "It
  occurred to me the other day that I am rather accurately modeled by
  a thunk --- I frequently need to be forced to completion." ---
  paraphrased from a {plan file}.

  Historical note: There are a couple of onomatopoeic myths
  circulating about the origin of this term.  The most common is that
  it is the sound made by data hitting the stack; another holds that
  the sound is that of the data hitting an accumulator.  Yet another
  holds that it is the sound of the expression being unfrozen at
  argument-evaluation time.  In fact, according to the inventors, it
  was coined after they realized (in the wee hours after hours of
  discussion) that the type of an argument in Algol-60 could be
  figured out in advance with a little compile-time thought,
  simplifying the evaluation machinery.  In other words, it had
  `already been thought of'; thus it was christened a `thunk',
  which is "the past tense of `think' at two in the morning".

tick: n. 1. A {jiffy} (sense 1).  2. In simulations, the
  discrete unit of time that passes between iterations of the
  simulation mechanism.  In AI applications, this amount of time is
  often left unspecified, since the only constraint of interest is
  the ordering of events.  This sort of AI simulation is often
  pejoratively referred to as `tick-tick-tick' simulation,
  especially when the issue of simultaneity of events with long,
  independent chains of causes is {handwave}d. 3. In the FORTH
  language, a single quote character.

tick-list features: [Acorn Computers] n. Features in software or
  hardware that customers insist on but never use (calculators in
  desktop TSRs and that sort of thing).  The American equivalent
  would be `checklist features', but this jargon sense of the
  phrase has not been reported.

tickle a bug: vt. To cause a normally hidden bug to manifest
  through some known series of inputs or operations.  "You can
  tickle the bug in the Paradise VGA card's highlight handling by
  trying to set bright yellow reverse video."

tiger team: [U.S. military jargon] n. A team whose purpose is to
  penetrate security, and thus test security measures.  These people
  are paid professionals who do hacker-type tricks, e.g., leave
  cardboard signs saying "bomb" in critical defense installations,
  hand-lettered notes saying "Your codebooks have been stolen"
  (they usually haven't been) inside safes, etc.  After a successful
  penetration, some high-ranking security type shows up the next
  morning for a `security review' and finds the sign, note, etc.,
  and all hell breaks loose.  Serious successes of tiger teams
  sometimes lead to early retirement for base commanders and security
  officers (see the {patch} entry for an example).

  A subset of tiger teams are professional {cracker}s, testing the
  security of military computer installations by attempting remote
  attacks via networks or supposedly `secure' comm channels.  Some of
  their escapades, if declassified, would probably rank among the
  greatest hacks of all times.  The term has been adopted in
  commercial computer-security circles in this more specific sense.

time sink: [poss. by analogy with `heat sink' or `current sink'] n.
  A project that consumes unbounded amounts of time.

time T: /ti:m T/ n. 1. An unspecified but usually well-understood
  time, often used in conjunction with a later time T+1.
  "We'll meet on campus at time T or at Louie's at
  time T+1" means, in the context of going out for dinner:
  "We can meet on campus and go to Louie's, or we can meet at Louie's
  itself a bit later."  (Louie's is a Chinese restaurant in Palo Alto
  that is a favorite with hackers.)  Had the number 30 been used instead
  of the number 1, it would have implied that the travel time from
  campus to Louie's is 30 minutes; whatever time T is (and
  that hasn't been decided on yet), you can meet half an hour later at
  Louie's than you could on campus and end up eating at the same time.
  See also {since time T equals minus infinity}.

times-or-divided-by: [by analogy with `plus-or-minus'] quant. Term
  occasionally used when describing the uncertainty associated with a
  scheduling estimate, for either humorous or brutally honest effect.
  For a software project, the factor is usually at least 2.

tinycrud: /ti:'nee-kruhd/ n. A pejorative used by habitues of older
  game-oriented {MUD} versions for TinyMUDs and other
  user-extensible {MUD} variants; esp. common among users of the
  rather violent and competitive AberMUD and MIST systems.  These
  people justify the slur on the basis of how (allegedly)
  inconsistent and lacking in genuine atmosphere the scenarios
  generated in user extensible MUDs can be.  Other common knocks on
  them are that they feature little overall plot, bad game topology,
  little competitive interaction, etc. --- not to mention the alleged
  horrors of the TinyMUD code itself.  This dispute is one of the MUD
  world's hardiest perennial {holy wars}.

tip of the ice-cube: [IBM] n. The visible part of something small and
  insignificant.  Used as an ironic comment in situations where `tip
  of the iceberg' might be appropriate if the subject were actually
  nontrivial.

tired iron: [IBM] n. Hardware that is perfectly functional but
  far enough behind the state of the art to have been superseded by new
  products, presumably with sufficient improvement in bang-per-buck that
  the old stuff is starting to look a bit like a {dinosaur}.

tits on a keyboard: n. Small bumps on certain keycaps to keep
  touch-typists registered (usually on the `5' of a numeric keypad,
  and on the `F' and `J' of a QWERTY keyboard).

TLA: /T-L-A/ [Three-Letter Acronym] n. 1. Self-describing
  acronym for a species with which computing terminology is infested.
  2. Any confusing acronym.  Examples include MCA, FTP, SNA, CPU,
  MMU, SCCS, DMU, FPU, NNTP, TLA.  People who like this looser usage
  argue that not all TLAs have three letters, just as not all four-letter
  words have four letters.  One also hears of `ETLA' (Extended
  Three-Letter Acronym, pronounced /ee tee el ay/) being used to
  describe four-letter acronyms.  The term `SFLA' (Stupid Four-Letter
  Acronym) has also been reported.  See also {YABA}.

  The self-effacing phrase "TDM TLA" (Too Damn Many...) is
  often used to bemoan the plethora of TLAs in use.  In 1989, a
  random of the journalistic persuasion asked hacker Paul Boutin
  "What do you think will be the biggest problem in computing in
  the 90s?"  Paul's straight-faced response: "There are only
  17,000 three-letter acronyms." (To be exact, there are 26^3
  = 17,576.)

TMRC: /tmerk'/ n. The Tech Model Railroad Club at MIT, one of
  the wellsprings of hacker culture.  The 1959 `Dictionary of
  the TMRC Language' compiled by Peter Samson included several terms
  which became basics of the hackish vocabulary (see esp. {foo}
  and {frob}).

  By 1962, TMRC's legendary layout was already a marvel of
  complexity.  The control system alone featured about 1200 relays.
  There were {scram switch}es located at numerous places around
  the room that could be pressed if something undesirable was about
  to occur, such as a train going full-bore at an obstruction.
  Another feature of the system was a digital clock on the dispatch
  board.  Normally it ran at some multiple of real time, but if
  someone hit a scram switch the clock stopped and the display was
  replaced with the word `FOO'.

  Steven Levy, in his book `Hackers' (see the Bibliography), gives a
  stimulating account of those early years.  TMRC's Power and Signals
  group included most of the early PDP-1 hackers and the people who
  later bacame the core of the MIT AI Lab staff.  Thirty years later
  that connection is still very much alive, and this lexicon
  accordingly includes a number of entries from a recent revision of
  the TMRC Dictionary.

to a first approximation: 1. [techspeak] When one is doing certain
  numerical computations, an approximate solution may be computed by
  any of several heuristic methods, then refined to a final value.
  By using the starting point of a first approximation of the answer,
  one can write an algorithm that converges more quickly to the
  correct result.  2. In jargon, a preface to any comment that
  indicates that the comment is only approximately true.  The remark
  "To a first approximation, I feel good" might indicate that
  deeper questioning would reveal that not all is perfect (e.g., a
  nagging cough still remains after an illness).

to a zeroth approximation: [from `to a first approximation'] A
  *really* sloppy approximation; a wild guess.  Compare
  {social science number}.

toast: 1. n. Any completely inoperable system or component, esp.
  one that has just crashed and burned: "Uh, oh ... I think the
  serial board is toast."  2. vt. To cause a system to crash
  accidentally, especially in a manner that requires manual
  rebooting.  "Rick just toasted the {firewall machine} again."

toaster: n. 1. The archetypal really stupid application for an
  embedded microprocessor controller; often used in comments that
  imply that a scheme is inappropriate technology (but see
  {elevator controller}).  "{DWIM} for an assembler?  That'd be
  as silly as running UNIX on your toaster!"  2. A very, very dumb
  computer. "You could run this program on any dumb toaster."  See
  {bitty box}, {Get a real computer!}, {toy}, {beige toaster}.
  3. A Macintosh, esp. the Classic Mac.  Some hold that this is
  implied by sense 2.  4. A peripheral device.  "I bought my box
  without toasters, but since then I've added two boards and a second
  disk drive."

toeprint: n. A {footprint} of especially small size.

toggle: vt. To change a {bit} from whatever state it is in to the
  other state; to change from 1 to 0 or from 0 to 1.  This comes from
  `toggle switches', such as standard light switches, though the
  word `toggle' actually refers to the mechanism that keeps the
  switch in the position to which it is flipped rather than to the
  fact that the switch has two positions.  There are four things you
  can do to a bit: set it (force it to be 1), clear (or zero) it,
  leave it alone, or toggle it.  (Mathematically, one would say that
  there are four distinct boolean-valued functions of one boolean
  argument, but saying that is much less fun than talking about
  toggling bits.)

tool: 1. n. A program used primarily to create, manipulate, modify,
  or analyze other programs, such as a compiler or an editor or a
  cross-referencing program.  Oppose {app}, {operating system}.
  2. [UNIX] An application program with a simple, `transparent'
  (typically text-stream) interface designed specifically to be used
  in programmed combination with other tools (see {filter}).
  3. [MIT: general to students there] vi. To work; to study (connotes
  tedium).  The TMRC Dictionary defined this as "to set one's brain
  to the grindstone".  See {hack}.  4. [MIT] n. A student who
  studies too much and hacks too little.  (MIT's student humor
  magazine rejoices in the name `Tool and Die'.)

toolsmith: n. The software equivalent of a tool-and-die specialist;
  one who specializes in making the {tool}s with which other
  programmers create applications.  See also {uninteresting}.

topic drift: n. Term used on GEnie, USENET and other electronic
  fora to describe the tendency of a {thread} to drift away from
  the original subject of discussion (and thus, from the Subject
  header of the originating message), or the results of that
  tendency.  Often used in gentle reminders that the discussion has
  strayed off any useful track.  "I think we started with a question
  about Niven's last book, but we've ended up discussing the sexual
  habits of the common marmoset.  Now *that's* topic drift!"

topic group: n. Syn. {forum}.

TOPS-10:: /tops-ten/ n. DEC's proprietary OS for the fabled {PDP-10}
  machines, long a favorite of hackers but now effectively extinct.
  A fountain of hacker folklore; see appendix A.  See also {{ITS}},
  {{TOPS-20}}, {{TWENEX}}, {VMS}, {operating system}.  TOPS-10 was
  sometimes called BOTS-10 (from `bottoms-ten') as a comment on the
  inappropriateness of describing it as the top of anything.

TOPS-20:: /tops-twen'tee/ n. See {{TWENEX}}.

toto: /toh'toh/ n. This is reported to be the default scratch
  file name among French-speaking programmers --- in other words, a
  francophone {foo}.

tourist: [ITS] n. A guest on the system, especially one who
  generally logs in over a network from a remote location for {comm
  mode}, email, games, and other trivial purposes.  One step below
  {luser}.  Hackers often spell this {turist}, perhaps by
  some sort of tenuous analogy with {luser} (this also expresses the
  ITS culture's penchant for six-letterisms).  Compare {twink},
  {read-only user}.

tourist information: n. Information in an on-line display that is
  not immediately useful, but contributes to a viewer's gestalt of
  what's going on with the software or hardware behind it.  Whether a
  given piece of info falls in this category depends partly on what
  the user is looking for at any given time.  The `bytes free'
  information at the bottom of an MS-DOS `dir' display is
  tourist information; so (most of the time) is the TIME information
  in a UNIX `ps(1)' display.

touristic: adj. Having the quality of a {tourist}.  Often used
  as a pejorative, as in `losing touristic scum'.  Often spelled
  `turistic' or `turistik', so that phrase might be more properly
  rendered `lusing turistic scum'.

toy: n. A computer system; always used with qualifiers.
  1. `nice toy': One that supports the speaker's hacking style
  adequately.  2. `just a toy': A machine that yields
  insufficient {computron}s for the speaker's preferred uses.  This
  is not condemnatory, as is {bitty box}; toys can at least be fun.
  It is also strongly conditioned by one's expectations; Cray XMP
  users sometimes consider the Cray-1 a `toy', and certainly all RISC
  boxes and mainframes are toys by their standards.  See also {Get
  a real computer!}.

toy language: n. A language useful for instructional purposes or
  as a proof-of-concept for some aspect of computer-science theory,
  but inadequate for general-purpose programming.  {Bad Thing}s
  can result when a toy language is promoted as a general purpose
  solution for programming (see {bondage-and-discipline
  language}); the classic example is {{Pascal}}.  Several moderately
  well-known formalisms for conceptual tasks such as programming Turing
  machines also qualify as toy languages in a less negative sense.
  See also {MFTL}.

toy problem: [AI] n. A deliberately oversimplified case of a
  challenging problem used to investigate, prototype, or test
  algorithms for a real problem.  Sometimes used pejoratively.  See
  also {gedanken}, {toy program}.

toy program: n. 1. One that can be readily comprehended; hence, a
  trivial program (compare {noddy}).  2. One for which the effort
  of initial coding dominates the costs through its life cycle.
  See also {noddy}.

trampoline: n. An incredibly {hairy} technique, found in some
  {HLL} and program-overlay implementations (e.g., on the
  Macintosh), that involves on-the-fly generation of small executable
  (and, likely as not, self-modifying) code objects to do indirection
  between code sections.  These pieces of {live data} are called
  `trampolines'.  Trampolines are notoriously difficult to understand
  in action; in fact, it is said by those who use this term that the
  trampoline that doesn't bend your brain is not the true
  trampoline.  See also {snap}.

trap: 1. n. A program interrupt, usually an interrupt caused by
  some exceptional situation in the user program.  In most cases, the
  OS performs some action, then returns control to the program.
  2. vi. To cause a trap.  "These instructions trap to the
  monitor."  Also used transitively to indicate the cause of the
  trap.  "The monitor traps all input/output instructions."

  This term is associated with assembler programming (`interrupt'
  or `exception' is more common among {HLL} programmers) and
  appears to be fading into history among programmers as the role of
  assembler continues to shrink.  However, it is still important to
  computer architects and systems hackers (see {system},
  sense 1), who use it to distinguish deterministically repeatable
  exceptions from timing-dependent ones (such as I/O interrupts).

trap door: alt. `trapdoor' n. 1. Syn. {back door}.
  2. [techspeak] A `trap-door function' is one which is easy to
  compute but very difficult to compute the inverse of.  Such
  functions have important applications in cryptography, specifically
  in the construction of public-key cryptosystems.

trash: vt. To destroy the contents of (said of a data structure).
  The most common of the family of near-synonyms including {mung},
  {mangle}, and {scribble}.

tree-killer: [Sun] n. 1. A printer.  2. A person who wastes paper.
  This should be interpreted in a broad sense; `wasting paper'
  includes the production of {spiffy} but {content-free} documents.
  Thus, most {suit}s are tree-killers.

trit: /trit/ [by analogy with `bit'] n. One base-3 digit; the
  amount of information conveyed by a selection among one of three
  equally likely outcomes (see also {bit}).  These arise, for
  example, in the context of a {flag} that should actually be able
  to assume *three* values --- such as yes, no, or unknown.  Trits are
  sometimes jokingly called `3-state bits'.  A trit may be
  semi-seriously referred to as `a bit and a half', although it is
  linearly equivalent to 1.5849625 bits (that is,
  log2(3)
  bits).

trivial: adj. 1. Too simple to bother detailing.  2. Not worth the
  speaker's time.  3. Complex, but solvable by methods so well known
  that anyone not utterly {cretinous} would have thought of them
  already.  4. Any problem one has already solved (some claim that
  hackish `trivial' usually evaluates to `I've seen it before').
  Hackers' notions of triviality may be quite at variance with those
  of non-hackers.  See {nontrivial}, {uninteresting}.

troglodyte: [Commodore] n. 1. A hacker who never leaves his
  cubicle.  The term `Gnoll' (from Dungeons & Dragons) is also
  reported.  2. A curmudgeon attached to an obsolescent computing
  environment.  The combination `ITS troglodyte' was flung around
  some during the USENET and email wringle-wrangle attending the
  2.x.x revision of the Jargon File; at least one of the people it
  was intended to describe adopted it with pride.

troglodyte mode: [Rice University] n. Programming with the lights
  turned off, sunglasses on, and the terminal inverted (black on
  white) because you've been up for so many days straight that your
  eyes hurt (see {raster burn}).  Loud music blaring from a stereo
  stacked in the corner is optional but recommended.  See {larval
  stage}, {hack mode}.

Trojan horse: [coined by MIT-hacker-turned-NSA-spook Dan Edwards]
  n. A program designed to break security or damage a system that is
  disguised as something else benign, such as a directory lister,
  archiver, a game, or (in one notorious 1990 case on the Mac) a
  program to find and destroy viruses!  See {back door}, {virus},
  {worm}.

true-hacker: [analogy with `trufan' from SF fandom] n. One who
  exemplifies the primary values of hacker culture, esp. competence
  and helpfulness to other hackers.  A high compliment.  "He spent
  6 hours helping me bring up UUCP and netnews on my FOOBAR 4000
  last week --- manifestly the act of a true-hacker."  Compare
  {demigod}, oppose {munchkin}.

tty: /T-T-Y/ [UNIX], /tit'ee/ [ITS, but some UNIX people say it
  this way as well; this pronunciation is not considered to have
  sexual undertones] n. 1. A terminal of the teletype variety,
  characterized by a noisy mechanical printer, a very limited
  character set, and poor print quality.  Usage: antiquated (like the
  TTYs themselves).  See also {bit-paired keyboard}.
  2. [especially UNIX] Any terminal at all; sometimes used to refer
  to the particular terminal controlling a given job.

tube: 1. n. A CRT terminal.  Never used in the mainstream sense of
  TV; real hackers don't watch TV, except for Loony Toons, Rocky &
  Bullwinkle, Trek Classic, the Simpsons, and the occasional cheesy
  old swashbuckler movie (see appendix B).  2. [IBM] To send a copy
  of something to someone else's terminal.  "Tube me that
  note?"

tube time: n. Time spent at a terminal or console.  More inclusive
  than hacking time; commonly used in discussions of what parts of
  one's environment one uses most heavily.  "I find I'm spending too
  much of my tube time reading mail since I started this revision."

tunafish: n. In hackish lore, refers to the mutated punchline of
  an age-old joke to be found at the bottom of the manual pages of
  `tunefs(8)' in the original {BSD} 4.2 distribution.  The
  joke was removed in later releases once commercial sites started
  developing in 4.2.  Tunefs relates to the `tuning' of
  file-system parameters for optimum performance, and at the bottom
  of a few pages of wizardly inscriptions was a `BUGS' section
  consisting of the line "You can tune a file system, but you can't
  tunafish".  Variants of this can be seen in other BSD versions,
  though it has been excised from some versions by humorless
  management {droid}s.  The [nt]roff source for SunOS 4.1.1
  contains a comment apparently designed to prevent this: "Take this
  out and a Unix Demon will dog your steps from now until the
  `time_t''s wrap around."

tune: [from automotive or musical usage] vt. To optimize a program
  or system for a particular environment, esp. by adjusting numerical
  parameters designed as {hook}s for tuning, e.g., by changing
  `#define' lines in C.  One may `tune for time' (fastest
  execution), `tune for space' (least memory use), or
  `tune for configuration' (most efficient use of hardware).  See
  {bum}, {hot spot}, {hand-hacking}.

turbo nerd: n. See {computer geek}.

turist: /too'rist/ n. Var. sp. of {tourist}, q.v.  Also in
  adjectival form, `turistic'.  Poss. influenced by {luser} and
  `Turing'.

tweak: vt. 1. To change slightly, usually in reference to a value.
  Also used synonymously with {twiddle}.  If a program is almost
  correct, rather than figure out the precise problem you might
  just keep tweaking it until it works.  See {frobnicate} and
  {fudge factor}; also see {shotgun debugging}.  2. To {tune}
  or {bum} a program; preferred usage in the U.K.

TWENEX:: /twe'neks/ n. The TOPS-20 operating system by DEC ---
  the second proprietary OS for the PDP-10 --- preferred by most
  PDP-10 hackers over TOPS-10 (that is, by those who were not
  {{ITS}} or {{WAITS}} partisans).  TOPS-20 began in 1969 as Bolt,
  Beranek & Newman's TENEX operating system using special paging
  hardware.  By the early 1970s, almost all of the systems on the
  ARPANET ran TENEX.  DEC purchased the rights to TENEX from BBN and
  began work to make it their own.  The first in-house code name for
  the operating system was VIROS (VIRtual memory Operating System);
  when customers started asking questions, the name was changed to
  SNARK so DEC could truthfully deny that there was any project
  called VIROS.  When the name SNARK became known, the name was
  briefly reversed to become KRANS; this was quickly abandoned when
  it was discovered that `krans' meant `funeral shroud' in
  Swedish.  Ultimately DEC picked TOPS-20 as the name of the
  operating system, and it was as TOPS-20 that it was marketed.  The
  hacker community, mindful of its origins, quickly dubbed it
  {{TWENEX}} (a contraction of `twenty TENEX'), even though by this
  point very little of the original TENEX code remained (analogously
  to the differences between AT&T V6 UNIX and BSD).  DEC people
  cringed when they heard "TWENEX", but the term caught on
  nevertheless (the written abbreviation `20x' was also used).
  TWENEX was successful and very popular; in fact, there was a period
  in the early 1980s when it commanded as fervent a culture of
  partisans as UNIX or ITS --- but DEC's decision to scrap all the
  internal rivals to the VAX architecture and its relatively stodgy
  VMS OS killed the DEC-20 and put a sad end to TWENEX's brief day in
  the sun.  DEC attempted to convince TOPS-20 hackers to convert to
  {VMS}, but instead, by the late 1980s, most of the TOPS-20
  hackers had migrated to UNIX.

twiddle: n. 1. Tilde (ASCII 1111110, `~').  Also
  called `squiggle', `sqiggle' (sic --- pronounced /skig'l/),
  and `twaddle', but twiddle is the most common term.  2. A small
  and insignificant change to a program.  Usually fixes one bug and
  generates several new ones.  3. vt. To change something in a small
  way.  Bits, for example, are often twiddled.  Twiddling a switch or
  knob implies much less sense of purpose than toggling or tweaking
  it; see {frobnicate}.  To speak of twiddling a bit connotes
  aimlessness, and at best doesn't specify what you're doing to the
  bit; `toggling a bit' has a more specific meaning (see {bit
  twiddling}, {toggle}).

twink: /twink/ [UCSC] n. Equivalent to {read-only user}.  Also
  reported on the USENET group soc.motss; may derive from gay
  slang for a cute young thing with nothing upstairs.

two pi: quant. The number of years it takes to finish one's
  thesis.  Occurs in stories in the following form: "He started on
  his thesis; 2 pi years later..."

two-to-the-N: quant. An amount much larger than {N} but smaller
  than {infinity}.  "I have 2-to-the-N things to do before I can
  go out for lunch" means you probably won't show up.

twonkie: /twon'kee/ n. The software equivalent of a Twinkie (a
  variety of sugar-loaded junk food, or (in gay slang) the male
  equivalent of `chick'); a useless `feature' added to look sexy
  and placate a {marketroid} (compare {Saturday-night
  special}).  This may also be related to "The Twonky", title menace
  of a classic SF short story by Lewis Padgett (Henry Kuttner and
  C. L. Moore), first published in the September 1942
  `Astounding Science Fiction' and subsequently much
  anthologized.

= U =
=====

UBD: /U-B-D/ [abbreviation for `User Brain Damage'] An
  abbreviation used to close out trouble reports obviously due to
  utter cluelessness on the user's part.  Compare {pilot error};
  oppose {PBD}; see also {brain-damaged}.

UN*X: n. Used to refer to the UNIX operating system (a trademark of
  AT&T) in writing, but avoiding the need for the ugly
  {(TM)} typography.
  Also used to refer to any or all varieties of Unixoid operating
  systems.  Ironically, lawyers now say (1990) that the requirement
  for the TM-postfix has no legal force, but the asterisk usage
  is entrenched anyhow.  It has been suggested that there may be a
  psychological connection to practice in certain religions
  (especially Judaism) in which the name of the deity is never
  written out in full, e.g., `YHWH' or `G--d' is used.  See also
  {glob}.

undefined external reference: excl. [UNIX] A message from UNIX's
  linker.  Used in speech to flag loose ends or dangling references
  in an argument or discussion.

under the hood: prep. [hot-rodder talk] 1. Used to introduce the
  underlying implementation of a product (hardware, software, or
  idea).  Implies that the implementation is not intuitively obvious
  from the appearance, but the speaker is about to enable the
  listener to {grok} it.  "Let's now look under the hood to see
  how ...." 2. Can also imply that the implementation is much
  simpler than the appearance would indicate: "Under the hood, we
  are just fork/execing the shell."  3. Inside a chassis, as in
  "Under the hood, this baby has a 40MHz 68030!"

undocumented feature: n. See {feature}.

uninteresting: adj. 1. Said of a problem that, although
  {nontrivial}, can be solved simply by throwing sufficient
  resources at it.  2. Also said of problems for which a solution
  would neither advance the state of the art nor be fun to design and
  code.

  Hackers regard uninteresting problems as intolerable wastes of
  time, to be solved (if at all) by lesser mortals.  *Real*
  hackers (see {toolsmith}) generalize uninteresting problems
  enough to make them interesting and solve them --- thus solving the
  original problem as a special case.  See {WOMBAT}, {SMOP};
  compare {toy problem}, oppose {interesting}.

UNIX:: /yoo'niks/ [In the authors' words, "A weak pun on
  Multics"] n. (also `Unix') An interactive time-sharing system
  originally invented in 1969 by Ken Thompson after Bell Labs left
  the Multics project, originally so he could play games on his
  scavenged PDP-7.  Dennis Ritchie, the inventor of C, is considered
  a co-author of the system.  The turning point in UNIX's history
  came when it was reimplemented almost entirely in C during
  1972--1974, making it the first source-portable OS.  UNIX
  subsequently underwent mutations and expansions at the hands of
  many different people, resulting in a uniquely flexible and
  developer-friendly environment.  In 1991, UNIX is the most widely
  used multiuser general-purpose operating system in the world.  Many
  people consider this the most important victory yet of hackerdom
  over industry opposition (but see {UNIX weenie} and {UNIX
  conspiracy} for an opposing point of view).  See {Version 7},
  {BSD}, {USG UNIX}.

UNIX brain damage: n. Something that has to be done to break a
  network program (typically a mailer) on a non-UNIX system so that
  it will interoperate with UNIX systems. The hack may qualify as
  `UNIX brain damage' if the program conforms to published standards
  and the UNIX program in question does not.  UNIX brain damage
  happens because it is much easier for other (minority) systems to
  change their ways to match non-conforming behavior than it is to
  change all the hundreds of thousands of UNIX systems out there.

  An example of UNIX brain damage is a {kluge} in a mail server to
  recognize bare line feed (the UNIX newline) as an equivalent form
  to the Internet standard newline, which is a carriage return
  followed by a line feed.  Such things can make even a hardened
  {jock} weep.

UNIX conspiracy: [ITS] n. According to a conspiracy theory long
  popular among {{ITS}} and {{TOPS-20}} fans, UNIX's growth is the
  result of a plot, hatched during the 1970s at Bell Labs, whose
  intent was to hobble AT&T's competitors by making them dependent
  upon a system whose future evolution was to be under AT&T's
  control.  This would be accomplished by disseminating an operating
  system that is apparently inexpensive and easily portable, but also
  relatively unreliable and insecure (so as to require continuing
  upgrades from AT&T).  This theory was lent a substantial impetus
  in 1984 by the paper referenced in the {back door} entry.

  In this view, UNIX was designed to be one of the first computer
  viruses (see {virus}) --- but a virus spread to computers indirectly
  by people and market forces, rather than directly through disks and
  networks.  Adherents of this `UNIX virus' theory like to cite the
  fact that the well-known quotation "UNIX is snake oil" was
  uttered by DEC president Kenneth Olsen shortly before DEC began
  actively promoting its own family of UNIX workstations.  (Olsen now
  claims to have been misquoted.)

UNIX weenie: [ITS] n. 1. A derogatory play on `UNIX wizard', common
  among hackers who use UNIX by necessity but would prefer
  alternatives.  The implication is that although the person in question
  may consider mastery of UNIX arcana to be a wizardly skill, the
  only real skill involved is the ability to tolerate (and the bad
  taste to wallow in) the incoherence and needless complexity that is
  alleged to infest many UNIX programs.  "This shell script tries to
  parse its arguments in 69 bletcherous ways.  It must have been
  written by a real UNIX weenie."  2. A derogatory term for anyone
  who engages in uncritical praise of UNIX.  Often appearing in the
  context "stupid UNIX weenie".  See {Weenix}, {UNIX
  conspiracy}.  See also {weenie}.

unixism: n. A piece of code or a coding technique that depends on the
  protected multi-tasking environment with relatively low
  process-spawn overhead that exists on virtual-memory UNIX systems.
  Common {unixism}s include: gratuitous use of `fork(2)'; the
  assumption that certain undocumented but well-known features of
  UNIX libraries such as `stdio(3)' are supported elsewhere;
  reliance on {obscure} side-effects of system calls (use of
  `sleep(2)' with a 0 argument to clue the scheduler that
  you're willing to give up your time-slice, for example); the
  assumption that freshly allocated memory is zeroed; and the assumption
  that fragmentation problems won't arise from never `free()'ing
  memory.  Compare {vaxocentrism}; see also {New Jersey}.

unswizzle: v. See {swizzle}.

unwind the stack: vi. 1. [techspeak] During the execution of a
  procedural language, one is said to `unwind the stack' from a
  called procedure up to a caller when one discards the stack frame
  and any number of frames above it, popping back up to the level of
  the given caller.  In C this is done with
  `longjmp'/`setjmp', in LISP with `throw/catch'.
  See also {smash the stack}.  2. People can unwind the stack as
  well, by quickly dealing with a bunch of problems: "Oh heck, let's
  do lunch.  Just a second while I unwind my stack."

unwind-protect: [MIT: from the name of a LISP operator] n. A task you
  must remember to perform before you leave a place or finish a
  project.  "I have an unwind-protect to call my advisor."

up: adj. 1. Working, in order.  "The down escalator is up."
  Oppose {down}.  2. `bring up': vt. To create a working
  version and start it.  "They brought up a down system."
  3. `come up' vi. To become ready for production use.

upload: /uhp'lohd/ v. 1. [techspeak] To transfer programs or data
  over a digital communications link from a smaller or peripheral
  `client' system to a larger or central `host' one.  A transfer in
  the other direction is, of course, called a {download} (but see
  the note about ground-to-space comm under that entry).
  2. [speculatively] To move the essential patterns and algorithms
  that make up one's mind from one's brain into a computer.  Only
  those who are convinced that such patterns and algorithms capture
  the complete essence of the self view this prospect with
  gusto.

upthread: adv. Earlier in the discussion (see {thread}), i.e.,
  `above'. "As Joe pointed out upthread, ..."  See also
  {followup}.

urchin: n. See {munchkin}.

USENET: /yoos'net/ or /yooz'net/ [from `Users' Network'] n.
  A distributed {bboard} (bulletin board) system supported mainly
  by UNIX machines.  Originally implemented in 1979-1980 by Steve
  Bellovin, Jim Ellis, Tom Truscott, and Steve Daniel at Duke
  University, it has swiftly grown to become international in scope
  and is now probably the largest decentralized information utility
  in existence.  As of early 1991, it hosts well over
  700 {newsgroup}s and an average of 16 megabytes (the equivalent
  of several thousand paper pages) of new technical articles, news,
  discussion, chatter, and {flamage} every day.

user: n. 1. Someone doing `real work' with the computer, using
  it as a means rather than an end.  Someone who pays to use a
  computer.  See {real user}.  2. A programmer who will believe
  anything you tell him.  One who asks silly questions.  [GLS
  observes: This is slightly unfair.  It is true that users ask
  questions (of necessity).  Sometimes they are thoughtful or deep.
  Very often they are annoying or downright stupid, apparently
  because the user failed to think for two seconds or look in the
  documentation before bothering the maintainer.]  See {luser}.
  3. Someone who uses a program from the outside, however skillfully,
  without getting into the internals of the program.  One who reports
  bugs instead of just going ahead and fixing them.

  The general theory behind this term is that there are two classes
  of people who work with a program: there are implementors (hackers)
  and {luser}s.  The users are looked down on by hackers to a mild
  degree because they don't understand the full ramifications of the
  system in all its glory.  (The few users who do are known as
  `real winners'.)  The term is a relative one: a skilled hacker
  may be a user with respect to some program he himself does not
  hack.  A LISP hacker might be one who maintains LISP or one who
  uses LISP (but with the skill of a hacker).  A LISP user is one who
  uses LISP, whether skillfully or not.  Thus there is some overlap
  between the two terms; the subtle distinctions must be resolved by
  context.

user-friendly: adj. Programmer-hostile.  Generally used by hackers in
  a critical tone, to describe systems that hold the user's hand so
  obsessively that they make it painful for the more experienced and
  knowledgeable to get any work done.  See {menuitis}, {drool-proof
  paper}, {Macintrash}, {user-obsequious}.

user-obsequious: adj. Emphatic form of {user-friendly}.  Connotes
  a system so verbose, inflexible, and determinedly simple-minded
  that it is nearly unusable.  "Design a system any fool can use and
  only a fool will want to use it."  See {WIMP environment},
  {Macintrash}.

USG UNIX: /U-S-G yoo'niks/ n. Refers to AT&T UNIX
  commercial versions after {Version 7}, especially System III and
  System V releases 1, 2, and 3.  So called because during most of
  the life-span of those versions AT&T's support crew was called the
  `UNIX Support Group'.  See {BSD}, {{UNIX}}.

UTSL: // [UNIX] n. On-line acronym for `Use the Source, Luke' (a
  pun on Obi-Wan Kenobi's "Use the Force, Luke!" in `Star
  Wars') --- analogous to {RTFM} but more polite.  This is a
  common way of suggesting that someone would be best off reading the
  source code that supports whatever feature is causing confusion,
  rather than making yet another futile pass through the manuals or
  broadcasting questions that haven't attracted {wizard}s to
  answer them.  In theory, this is appropriately directed only at
  associates of some outfit with a UNIX source license; in practice,
  bootlegs of UNIX source code (made precisely for reference
  purposes) are so ubiquitous that one may utter this at almost
  anyone on {the network} without concern.  In the near future
  (this written in 1991) source licenses may become even less
  important; after the recent release of the Mach 3.0 microkernal,
  given the continuing efforts of the {GNU} project, and with the
  4.4BSD release on the horizon, complete free source code for
  UNIX-clone toolsets and kernels should soon be widely available.

UUCPNET: n. The store-and-forward network consisting of all the
  world's connected UNIX machines (and others running some clone of
  the UUCP (UNIX-to-UNIX CoPy) software).  Any machine reachable only
  via a {bang path} is on UUCPNET.  See {network address}.

= V =
=====

vadding: /vad'ing/ [from VAD, a permutation of ADV (i.e.,
  {ADVENT}), used to avoid a particular {admin}'s continual
  search-and-destroy sweeps for the game] n. A leisure-time activity
  of certain hackers involving the covert exploration of the `secret'
  parts of large buildings --- basements, roofs, freight elevators,
  maintenance crawlways, steam tunnels, and the like.  A few go so
  far as to learn locksmithing in order to synthesize vadding keys.
  The verb is `to vad' (compare {phreaking}).

  The most extreme and dangerous form of vadding is `elevator
  rodeo', a.k.a. `elevator surfing', a sport played by wrasslin'
  down a thousand-pound elevator car with a 3-foot piece of
  string, and then exploiting this mastery in various stimulating
  ways (such as elevator hopping, shaft exploration, rat-racing, and
  the ever-popular drop experiments).  Kids, don't try this at home!
  See also {hobbit} (sense 2).

vanilla: [from the default flavor of ice cream in the U.S.] adj.
  Ordinary {flavor}, standard.  When used of food, very often does
  not mean that the food is flavored with vanilla extract!  For
  example, `vanilla wonton soup' means ordinary wonton soup, as
  opposed to hot-and-sour wonton soup.  Applied to hardware and
  software, as in "Vanilla Version 7 UNIX can't run on a
  vanilla 11/34."  Also used to orthogonalize chip nomenclature; for
  instance, a 74V00 means what TI calls a 7400, as distinct from
  a 74LS00, etc.  This word differs from {canonical} in that the
  latter means `default', whereas vanilla simply means `ordinary'.
  For example, when hackers go on a {great-wall}, hot-and-sour
  wonton soup is the {canonical} wonton soup to get (because that
  is what most of them usually order) even though it isn't the
  vanilla wonton soup.

vannevar: /van'*-var/ n. A bogus technological prediction or
  a foredoomed engineering concept, esp. one that fails by
  implicitly assuming that technologies develop linearly,
  incrementally, and in isolation from one another when in fact the
  learning curve tends to be highly nonlinear, revolutions are
  common, and competition is the rule.  The prototype was Vannevar
  Bush's prediction of `electronic brains' the size of the Empire
  State Building with a Niagara-Falls-equivalent cooling system for
  their tubes and relays, made at a time when the semiconductor effect had
  already been demonstrated.  Other famous vannevars have included
  magnetic-bubble memory, LISP machines, {videotex}, and a paper from
  the late 1970s that computed a purported ultimate limit on areal
  density for ICs that was in fact less than the routine densities
  of 5 years later.

vaporware: /vay'pr-weir/ n. Products announced far in advance of
  any release (which may or may not actually take place).

var: /veir/ or /var/ n. Short for `variable'.  Compare {arg},
  {param}.

VAX: /vaks/ n. 1. [from Virtual Address eXtension] The most
  successful minicomputer design in industry history, possibly
  excepting its immediate ancestor, the PDP-11.  Between its release
  in 1978 and its eclipse by {killer micro}s after about 1986, the VAX
  was probably the hacker's favorite machine of them all, esp.
  after the 1982 release of 4.2 BSD UNIX (see {BSD}).  Esp.
  noted for its large, assembler-programmer-friendly instruction set
  --- an asset that became a liability after the RISC revolution.
  2. A major brand of vacuum cleaner in Britain.  Cited here because
  its alleged sales pitch, "Nothing sucks like a VAX!" became a
  sort of battle-cry of RISC partisans.  Ironically, the slogan was
  *not* actually used by the Vax vacuum-cleaner people, but was
  actually that of a rival brand called Electrolux (as in "Nothing
  sucks like an...").  It is claimed, however, that DEC actually
  entered a cross-licensing deal with the vacuum-Vax people that
  allowed them to market VAX computers in the U.K. in return for not
  challenging the vacuum cleaner trademark in the U.S.

VAXectomy: /vak-sek't*-mee/ [by analogy with `vasectomy'] n. A
  VAX removal.  DEC's Microvaxen, especially, are much slower than
  newer RISC-based workstations such as the SPARC.  Thus, if one knows
  one has a replacement coming, VAX removal can be cause for
  celebration.

VAXen: /vak'sn/ [from `oxen', perhaps influenced by `vixen'] n.
  (alt. `vaxen') The plural canonically used among hackers for the
  DEC VAX computers.  "Our installation has four PDP-10s and twenty
  vaxen."  See {boxen}.

vaxherd: n. /vaks'herd/ [from `oxherd'] A VAX operator.

vaxism: /vak'sizm/ n. A piece of code that exhibits
  {vaxocentrism} in critical areas.  Compare {PC-ism},
  {unixism}.

vaxocentrism: /vak`soh-sen'trizm/ [analogy with
  `ethnocentrism'] n. A notional disease said to afflict
  C programmers who persist in coding according to certain assumptions that are
  valid (esp. under UNIX) on {VAXen} but false elsewhere. Among
  these are:

 1.    The assumption that dereferencing a null pointer is safe because it
       is all bits 0, and location 0 is readable and 0.  Problem: this may
       instead cause an illegal-address trap on non-VAXen, and even on
       VAXen under OSes other than BSD UNIX.  Usually this is an implicit
       assumption of sloppy code (forgetting to check the pointer before
       using it), rather than deliberate exploitation of a
       misfeature.)

 2.    The assumption that characters are signed.

 3.    The assumption that a pointer to any one type can freely be cast
       into a pointer to any other type.  A stronger form of this is the
       assumption that all pointers are the same size and format, which
       means you don't have to worry about getting the types correct in
       calls.  Problem: this fails on word-oriented machines or others with
       multiple pointer formats.

 4.    The assumption that the parameters of a routine are stored in
       memory, contiguously, and in strictly ascending or descending order.
       Problem: this fails on many RISC architectures.

 5.    The assumption that pointer and integer types are the same size,
       and that pointers can be stuffed into integer variables (and
       vice-versa) and drawn back out without being truncated or mangled.
       Problem: this fails on segmented architectures or word-oriented
       machines with funny pointer formats.

 6.    The assumption that a data type of any size may begin at any byte
       address in memory (for example, that you can freely construct and
       dereference a pointer to a word- or greater-sized object at an odd
       char address).  Problem: this fails on many (esp. RISC)
       architectures better optimized for {HLL} execution speed, and
       can cause an illegal address fault or bus error.

 7.    The (related) assumption that there is no padding at the end of
       types and that in an array you can thus step right from the last
       byte of a previous component to the first byte of the next one.
       This is not only machine- but compiler-dependent.

 8.    The assumption that memory address space is globally flat and that
       the array reference `foo[-1]' is necessarily valid.  Problem:
       this fails at 0, or other places on segment-addressed machines like
       Intel chips (yes, segmentation is universally considered a
       {brain-damaged} way to design machines (see {moby}), but that
       is a separate issue).

 9.    The assumption that objects can be arbitrarily large with no
       special considerations.  Problem: this fails on segmented
       architectures and under non-virtual-addressing environments.

10.    The assumption that the stack can be as large as memory.  Problem:
       this fails on segmented architectures or almost anything else without
       virtual addressing and a paged stack.

11.    The assumption that bits and addressable units within an object
       are ordered in the same way and that this order is a constant of
       nature.  Problem: this fails on {big-endian} machines.

12.    The assumption that it is meaningful to compare pointers to
       different objects not located within the same array, or to objects
       of different types.  Problem: the former fails on segmented
       architectures, the latter on word-oriented machines or others with
       multiple pointer formats.

13.    The assumption that an `int' is 32 bits, or (nearly
       equivalently) the assumption that `sizeof(int) ==
       sizeof(long)'.  Problem: this fails on 286-based systems and even
       on 386 and 68000 systems under some compilers.

14.    The assumption that `argv[]' is writable.  Problem: this fails in
       some embedded-systems C environments.

  Note that a programmer can validly be accused of vaxocentrism
  even if he or she has never seen a VAX.  Some of these assumptions
  (esp. 2--5) were valid on the PDP-11, the original C machine, and
  became endemic years before the VAX.  The terms `vaxocentricity'
  and `all-the-world's-a-VAX syndrome' have been used synonymously.

vdiff: /vee'dif/ v.,n. Visual diff.  The operation of finding
  differences between two files by {eyeball search}.  The term
  `optical diff' has also been reported.  See {diff}.

veeblefester: /vee'b*l-fes`tr/ [from the "Born Loser"
  comix via Commodore; prob. originally from `Mad' Magazine's
  `Veeblefeetzer' parodies ca. 1960] n. Any obnoxious person engaged
  in the (alleged) professions of marketing or management.  Antonym of
  {hacker}.  Compare {suit}, {marketroid}.

Venus flytrap: [after the insect-eating plant] n. See {firewall
  machine}.

verbage: /ver'b*j/ n. A deliberate misspelling and mispronunciation of
  {verbiage} that assimilates it to the word `garbage'.  Compare
  {content-free}.  More pejorative than `verbiage'.

verbiage: n. When the context involves a software or hardware
  system, this refers to {{documentation}}.  This term borrows the
  connotations of mainstream `verbiage' to suggest that the
  documentation is of marginal utility and that the motives behind
  its production have little to do with the ostensible subject.

Version 7: alt. V7 /vee' se'vn/ n. The 1978 unsupported release of
  {{UNIX}} ancestral to all current commercial versions.  Before
  the release of the POSIX/SVID standards, V7's features were often
  treated as a UNIX portability baseline.  See {BSD}, {USG UNIX},
  {{UNIX}}.  Some old-timers impatient with commercialization and
  kernel bloat still maintain that V7 was the Last True UNIX.

vgrep: /vee'grep/ v.,n. Visual grep.  The operation of finding
  patterns in a file optically rather than digitally.  See {grep};
  compare {vdiff}.

vi: /V-I/, *not* /vi:/ and *never* /siks/ [from
  `Visual Interface'] n. A screen editor crufted together by Bill Joy
  for an early {BSD} version.  Became the de facto standard UNIX
  editor and a nearly undisputed hacker favorite until the rise of
  {EMACS} after about 1984.  Tends to frustrate new users no end,
  as it will neither take commands while expecting input text nor
  vice versa, and the default setup provides no indication of which
  mode one is in (one correspondent accordingly reports that he has
  often heard the editor's name pronounced /vi:l/).  Nevertheless it
  is still widely used (about half the respondents in a 1991 USENET
  poll preferred it), and even EMACS fans often resort to it as a
  mail editor and for small editing jobs (mainly because it starts up
  faster than bulky EMACS).  See {holy wars}.

videotex: n. obs. An electronic service offering people the
  privilege of paying to read the weather on their television screens
  instead of having somebody read it to them for free while they
  brush their teeth.  The idea bombed everywhere it wasn't
  government-subsidized, because by the time videotex was practical
  the installed base of personal computers could hook up to
  timesharing services and do the things for which videotex might
  have been worthwhile better and cheaper.  Videotex planners badly
  overestimated both the appeal of getting information from a
  computer and the cost of local intelligence at the user's end.
  Like the {gorilla arm} effect, this has been a cautionary tale
  to hackers ever since.  See also {vannevar}.

virgin: adj. Unused; pristine; in a known initial state.  "Let's
  bring up a virgin system and see if it crashes again."  (Esp.
  useful after contracting a {virus} through {SEX}.)  Also, by
  extension, buffers and the like within a program that have not yet
  been used.

virtual: [via the technical term `virtual memory', prob. from the
  term `virtual image' in optics] adj. 1. Common alternative to
  {logical}.  2. Simulated; performing the functions of something
  that isn't really there.  An imaginative child's doll may be a
  virtual playmate.

virtual Friday: n. The last day before an extended weekend, if
  that day is not a `real' Friday.  For example, the U.S. holiday
  Thanksgiving is always on a Thursday.  The next day is often also
  a holiday or taken as an extra day off, in which case Wednesday of
  that week is a virtual Friday (and Thursday is a virtual Saturday,
  as is Friday).  There are also `virtual Mondays' that are
  actually Tuesdays, after the three-day weekends associated with many
  national holidays in the U.S.

virtual reality: n. 1. Computer simulations that use 3-D graphics
  and devices such as the Dataglove to allow the user to interact
  with the simulation.  See {cyberspace}.  2. A form of network
  interaction incorporating aspects of role-playing games,
  interactive theater, improvisational comedy, and `true confessions'
  magazines.  In a virtual reality forum (such as USENET's
  alt.callahans newsgroup or the {MUD} experiments on Internet),
  interaction between the participants is written like a shared novel
  complete with scenery, `foreground characters' that may be
  personae utterly unlike the people who write them, and common
  `background characters' manipulable by all parties.  The one
  iron law is that you may not write irreversible changes to a
  character without the consent of the person who `owns' it.
  Otherwise anything goes.  See {bamf}, {cyberspace}.

virus: [from the obvious analogy with biological viruses, via SF]
  n. A cracker program that searches out other programs and `infects'
  them by embedding a copy of itself in them, so that they become
  {Trojan Horse}s.  When these programs are executed, the embedded
  virus is executed too, thus propagating the `infection'.  This
  normally happens invisibly to the user.  Unlike a {worm}, a
  virus cannot infect other computers without assistance.  It is
  propagated by vectors such as humans trading programs with their
  friends (see {SEX}).  The virus may do nothing but propagate
  itself and then allow the program to run normally.  Usually,
  however, after propagating silently for a while, it starts doing
  things like writing cute messages on the terminal or playing
  strange tricks with your display (some viruses include nice
  {display hack}s).  Many nasty viruses, written by particularly
  perversely minded {cracker}s, do irreversible damage, like
  nuking all the user's files.

  In the 1990s, viruses have become a serious problem, especially
  among IBM PC and Macintosh users (the lack of security on these
  machines enables viruses to spread easily, even infecting the
  operating system).  The production of special anti-virus software
  has become an industry, and a number of exaggerated media reports
  have caused outbreaks of near hysteria among users; many
  {luser}s tend to blame *everything* that doesn't work as
  they had expected on virus attacks.  Accordingly, this sense of
  `virus' has passed not only into techspeak but into also popular
  usage (where it is often incorrectly used to denote a {worm} or
  even a {Trojan horse}).  Compare {back door}; see also
  {UNIX conspiracy}.

visionary: n. 1. One who hacks vision, in the sense of an
  Artificial Intelligence researcher working on the problem of
  getting computers to `see' things using TV cameras.  (There isn't
  any problem in sending information from a TV camera to a computer.
  The problem is, how can the computer be programmed to make use of
  the camera information?  See {SMOP}, {AI-complete}.)  2. [IBM]
  One who reads the outside literature.  At IBM, apparently, such a
  penchant is viewed with awe and wonder.

VMS: /V-M-S/ n. DEC's proprietary operating system for its VAX
  minicomputer; one of the seven or so environments that loom largest
  in hacker folklore.  Many UNIX fans generously concede that VMS
  would probably be the hacker's favorite commercial OS if UNIX
  didn't exist; though true, this makes VMS fans furious.  One major
  hacker gripe with VMS concerns its slowness --- thus the following
  limerick:

       There once was a system called VMS
       Of cycles by no means abstemious.
            It's chock-full of hacks
            And runs on a VAX
       And makes my poor stomach all squeamious.
                                        --- The Great Quux

  See also {VAX}, {{TOPS-10}}, {{TOPS-20}}, {{UNIX}}, {runic}.

voice: vt. To phone someone, as opposed to emailing them or
  connecting in talk mode.  "I'm busy now; I'll voice you later."

voice-net: n. Hackish way of referring to the telephone system,
  analogizing it to a digital network.  USENET {sig block}s not
  uncommonly include the sender's phone next to a "Voice:" or
  "Voice-Net:" header; common variants of this are "Voicenet" and
  "V-Net".  Compare {paper-net}, {snail-mail}.

voodoo programming: [from George Bush's "voodoo economics"] n.
  The use by guess or cookbook of an {obscure} or {hairy} system,
  feature, or algorithm that one does not truly understand.  The
  implication is that the technique may not work, and if it doesn't,
  one will never know why.  Almost synonymous with {black magic},
  except that black magic typically isn't documented and
  *nobody* understands it.  Compare {magic}, {deep magic},
  {heavy wizardry}, {rain dance}, {cargo cult programming},
  {wave a dead chicken}.

VR: // [MUD] n. On-line abbrev for {virtual reality}, as
  opposed to {RL}.

Vulcan nerve pinch: n. [from the old "Star Trek" TV series via
  Commodore Amiga hackers] The keyboard combination that forces a
  soft-boot or jump to ROM monitor (on machines that support such a
  feature).  On many micros this is Ctrl-Alt-Del; on Suns, L1-A; on
  some Macintoshes, it is <Cmd>-<Power switch>!  Also called
  {three-finger salute}.  Compare {quadruple bucky}.

vulture capitalist: n. Pejorative hackerism for `venture
  capitalist', deriving from the common practice of pushing contracts
  that deprive inventors of control over their own innovations and
  most of the money they ought to have made from them.

= W =
=====

wabbit: /wab'it/ [almost certainly from Elmer Fudd's immortal
  line "You wascawwy wabbit!"] n. 1. A legendary early hack
  reported on a System/360 at RPI and elsewhere around 1978.  The
  program would make two copies of itself every time it was run,
  eventually crashing the system.  2. By extension, any hack that
  includes infinite self-replication but is not a {virus} or
  {worm}.  See also {cookie monster}.

WAITS:: /wayts/ n. The mutant cousin of {{TOPS-10}} used on a
  handful of systems at {{SAIL}} up to 1990.  There was never an
  `official' expansion of WAITS (the name itself having been arrived
  at by a rather sideways process), but it was frequently glossed as
  `West-coast Alternative to ITS'.  Though WAITS was less visible
  than ITS, there was frequent exchange of people and ideas between
  the two communities, and innovations pioneered at WAITS exerted
  enormous indirect influence.  The early screen modes of {EMACS},
  for example, were directly inspired by WAITS's `E' editor --- one
  of a family of editors that were the first to do `real-time
  editing', in which the editing commands were invisible and where
  one typed text at the point of insertion/overwriting.  The modern
  style of multi-region windowing is said to have originated there,
  and WAITS alumni at XEROX PARC and elsewhere played major roles in
  the developments that led to the XEROX Star, the Macintosh, and the
  Sun workstations.  {Bucky bits} were also invented there ---
  thus, the ALT key on every IBM PC is a WAITS legacy.  One notable
  WAITS feature seldom duplicated elsewhere was a news-wire interface
  that allowed WAITS hackers to read, store, and filter AP and UPI
  dispatches from their terminals; the system also featured a
  still-unusual level of support for what is now called `multimedia'
  computing, allowing analog audio and video signals to be switched
  to programming terminals.

waldo: /wol'doh/ [From Robert A. Heinlein's story "Waldo"]
  1. A mechanical agent, such as a gripper arm, controlled by a human
  limb.  When these were developed for the nuclear industry in the
  mid-1940s they were named after the invention described by Heinlein
  in the story, which he wrote in 1942.  Now known by the more
  generic term `telefactoring', this technology is of intense
  interest to NASA for tasks like space station maintenance.  2. At
  Harvard (particularly by Tom Cheatham and students), this is used
  instead of {foobar} as a meta-syntactic variable and general
  nonsense word.  See {foo}, {bar}, {foobar}, {quux}.

walk: n.,vt. Traversal of a data structure, especially an array or
  linked-list data structure in {core}.  See also {codewalker},
  {silly walk}, {clobber}.

walk off the end of: vt. To run past the end of an array, list, or      medium after stepping through it --- a good way to land in trouble.
  Often the result of an {off-by-one error}.  Compare
  {clobber}, {roach}, {smash the stack}.

walking drives: n. An occasional failure mode of magnetic-disk
  drives back in the days when they were huge, clunky {washing
  machine}s.  Those old {dinosaur} parts carried terrific angular
  momentum; the combination of a misaligned spindle or worn bearings
  and stick-slip interactions with the floor could cause them to
  `walk' across a room, lurching alternate corners forward a couple
  of millimeters at a time.  There is a legend about a drive that
  walked over to the only door to the computer room and jammed it
  shut; the staff had to cut a hole in the wall in order to get at
  it!  Walking could also be induced by certain patterns of drive
  access (a fast seek across the whole width of the disk, followed by
  a slow seek in the other direction).  Some bands of old-time
  hackers figured out how to induce disk-accessing patterns that
  would do this to particular drive models and held disk-drive races.

wall: [WPI] interj. 1. An indication of confusion, usually spoken
  with a quizzical tone:  "Wall??"  2. A request for further
  explication.  Compare {octal forty}.

  It is said that "Wall?" really came from `like talking to a
  blank wall'.  It was initially used in situations where, after you
  had carefully answered a question, the questioner stared at you
  blankly, clearly having understood nothing that was explained.  You
  would then throw out a "Hello, wall?" to elicit some sort of
  response from the questioner.  Later, confused questioners began
  voicing "Wall?" themselves.

wall follower: n. A person or algorithm that compensates for lack
  of sophistication or native stupidity by efficiently following some
  simple procedure shown to have been effective in the past.  Used of
  an algorithm, this is not necessarily pejorative; it recalls
  `Harvey Wallbanger', the winning robot in an early AI contest
  (named, of course, after the cocktail).  Harvey successfully solved
  mazes by keeping a `finger' on one wall and running till it came
  out the other end.  This was inelegant, but it was mathematically
  guaranteed to work on simply-connected mazes --- and, in fact,
  Harvey outperformed more sophisticated robots that tried to
  `learn' each maze by building an internal representation of it.
  Used of humans, the term *is* pejorative and implies an
  uncreative, bureaucratic, by-the-book mentality.  See also {code
  grinder}, {droid}.

wall time: n. (also `wall clock time') 1. `Real world' time (what
  the clock on the wall shows), as opposed to the system clock's idea
  of time.  2. The real running time of a program, as opposed to the
  number of {clocks} required to execute it (on a timesharing
  system these will differ, as no one program gets all the
  {clocks}, and on multiprocessor systems with good thread support
  one may get more processor clocks than real-time clocks).

wallpaper: n. 1. A file containing a listing (e.g., assembly
  listing) or a transcript, esp. a file containing a transcript of
  all or part of a login session.  (The idea was that the paper for
  such listings was essentially good only for wallpaper, as evidenced
  at Stanford, where it was used to cover windows.)  Now rare,
  esp. since other systems have developed other terms for it (e.g.,
  PHOTO on TWENEX).  However, the UNIX world doesn't have an
  equivalent term, so perhaps {wallpaper} will take hold there.
  The term probably originated on ITS, where the commands to begin
  and end transcript files were `:WALBEG' and `:WALEND',
  with default file `WALL PAPER' (the space was a path
  delimiter).  2. The background pattern used on graphical
  workstations (this is techspeak under the `Windows' graphical user
  interface to MS-DOS).  3. `wallpaper file' n. The file that
  contains the wallpaper information before it is actually printed on
  paper.  (Even if you don't intend ever to produce a real paper copy
  of the file, it is still called a wallpaper file.)

wango: /wang'goh/ n. Random bit-level {grovel}ling going on in
  a system during some unspecified operation.  Often used in
  combination with {mumble}.  For example: "You start with the `.o'
  file, run it through this postprocessor that does mumble-wango ---
  and it comes out a snazzy object-oriented executable."

wank: /wangk/ [Columbia University: prob. by mutation from
  Commonwealth slang v. `wank', to masturbate] n.,v. Used much as
  {hack} is elsewhere, as a noun denoting a clever technique or
  person or the result of such cleverness.  May describe (negatively)
  the act of hacking for hacking's sake ("Quit wanking, let's go get
  supper!")  or (more positively) a {wizard}.  Adj.  `wanky'
  describes something particularly clever (a person, program, or
  algorithm).  Conversations can also get wanky when there are too
  many wanks involved.  This excess wankiness is signalled by an
  overload of the `wankometer' (compare {bogometer}).  When the
  wankometer overloads, the conversation's subject must be changed,
  or all non-wanks will leave.  Compare `neep-neeping' (under
  {neep-neep}).  Usage: U.S. only.  In Britain and the Commonwealth
  this word is *extremely* rude and is best avoided unless one
  intends to give offense.

wannabee: /won'*-bee/ (also, more plausibly, spelled `wannabe')
  [from a term recently used to describe Madonna fans who dress,
  talk, and act like their idol; prob. originally from biker slang]
  n. A would-be {hacker}.  The connotations of this term differ
  sharply depending on the age and exposure of the subject.  Used of
  a person who is in or might be entering {larval stage}, it is
  semi-approving; such wannabees can be annoying but most hackers
  remember that they, too, were once such creatures.  When used of
  any professional programmer, CS academic, writer, or {suit}, it is
  derogatory, implying that said person is trying to cuddle up to the
  hacker mystique but doesn't, fundamentally, have a prayer of
  understanding what it is all about.  Overuse of terms from this lexicon
  is often an indication of the {wannabee} nature.  Compare
  {newbie}.

  Historical note: The wannabee phenomenon has a slightly different
  flavor now (1991) than it did ten or fifteen years ago.  When the
  people who are now hackerdom's tribal elders were in {larval
  stage}, the process of becoming a hacker was largely unconscious
  and unaffected by models known in popular culture --- communities
  formed spontaneously around people who, *as individuals*, felt
  irresistibly drawn to do hackerly things, and what wannabees
  experienced was a fairly pure, skill-focused desire to become
  similarly wizardly.  Those days of innocence are gone forever;
  society's adaptation to the advent of the microcomputer after 1980
  included the elevation of the hacker as a new kind of folk hero,
  and the result is that some people semi-consciously set out to
  *be hackers* and borrow hackish prestige by fitting the
  popular image of hackers.  Fortunately, to do this really well, one
  has to actually become a wizard.  Nevertheless, old-time hackers
  tend to share a poorly articulated disquiet about the change; among
  other things, it gives them mixed feelings about the effects of
  public compendia of lore like this one.

warm boot: n. See {boot}.

wart: n. A small, {crock}y {feature} that sticks out of an
  otherwise {clean} design.  Something conspicuous for localized
  ugliness, especially a special-case exception to a general rule.
  For example, in some versions of `csh(1)', single quotes
  literalize every character inside them except `!'.  In ANSI C,
  the `??' syntax used obtaining ASCII characters in a foreign
  environment is a wart.  See also {miswart}.

washing machine: n. Old-style 14-inch hard disks in floor-standing
  cabinets.  So called because of the size of the cabinet and the
  `top-loading' access to the media packs --- and, of course, they
  were always set on `spin cycle'.  The washing-machine idiom
  transcends language barriers; it is even used in Russian hacker
  jargon.  See also {walking drives}.  The thick channel cables
  connecting these were called `bit hoses' (see {hose}).

water MIPS: n. (see {MIPS}, sense 2) Large, water-cooled
  machines of either today's ECL-supercomputer flavor or yesterday's
  traditional {mainframe} type.


wave a dead chicken: v. To perform a ritual in the direction of
  crashed software or hardware that one believes to be futile but
  is nevertheless necessary so that others are satisfied that an
  appropriate degree of effort has been expended.  "I'll wave a dead
  chicken over the source code, but I really think we've run into an
  OS bug."  Compare {voodoo programming}, {rain dance}.

weasel: n. [Cambridge] A na"ive user, one who deliberately or
  accidentally does things that are stupid or ill-advised.  Roughly
  synonymous with {loser}.

wedged: [from a common description of recto-cranial inversion] adj.
  1. To be stuck, incapable of proceeding without help.  This is
  different from having crashed.  If the system has crashed, then it
  has become totally non-functioning.  If the system is wedged, it is
  trying to do something but cannot make progress; it may be capable
  of doing a few things, but not be fully operational.  For example,
  a process may become wedged if it {deadlock}s with another (but
  not all instances of wedging are deadlocks).  Being wedged is
  slightly milder than being {hung}.  See also {gronk}, {locked
  up}, {hosed}.  Describes a {deadlock}ed condition.  2. Often
  refers to humans suffering misconceptions.  "He's totally wedged
  --- he's convinced that he can levitate through meditation."
  3. [UNIX] Specifically used to describe the state of a TTY left in
  a losing state by abort of a screen-oriented program or one that
  has messed with the line discipline in some obscure way.

wedgie: [Fairchild] n. A bug.  Prob. related to {wedged}.

wedgitude: /wedj'i-t[y]ood/ n. The quality or state of being
  {wedged}.

weeble: /weeb'l/ [Cambridge] interj. Used to denote frustration,
  usually at amazing stupidity.  "I stuck the disk in upside down."
  "Weeble...." Compare {gurfle}.

weeds: n. 1. Refers to development projects or algorithms that have
  no possible relevance or practical application.  Comes from `off in
  the weeds'.  Used in phrases like "lexical analysis for microcode
  is serious weeds...."  2. At CDC/ETA before its demise, the
  phrase `go off in the weeds' was equivalent to IBM's {branch to
  Fishkill} and mainstream hackerdom's {jump off into never-never
  land}.

weenie: n. 1. When used with a qualifier (for example, as in
  {UNIX weenie}, VMS weenie, IBM weenie) this can be either an
  insult or a term of praise, depending on context, tone of voice,
  and whether or not it is applied by a person who considers
  him or herself to be the same sort of weenie.  Implies that the weenie
  has put a major investment of time, effort, and concentration into
  the area indicated; whether this is positive or negative depends on
  the hearer's judgment of how the speaker feels about that area.
  See also {bigot}.  2. The semicolon character, `;' (ASCII
  0111011).

Weenix: /wee'niks/ [ITS] n. A derogatory term for {{UNIX}},
  derived from {UNIX weenie}.  According to one noted ex-ITSer, it
  is "the operating system preferred by Unix Weenies: typified by
  poor modularity, poor reliability, hard file deletion, no file
  version numbers, case sensitivity everywhere, and users who believe
  that these are all advantages".  Some ITS fans behave as though
  they believe UNIX stole a future that rightfully belonged to them.
  See {{ITS}}, sense 2.

well-behaved: adj. 1. [primarily {{MS-DOS}}] Said of software
  conforming to system interface guidelines and standards.
  Well-behaved software uses the operating system to do chores such
  as keyboard input, allocating memory and drawing graphics.  Oppose
  {ill-behaved}.  2. Software that does its job quietly and
  without counterintuitive effects.  Esp. said of software having
  an interface spec sufficiently simple and well-defined that it can
  be used as a {tool} by other software. See {cat}.

well-connected: adj. Said of a computer installation, this means
  that it has reliable email links with {the network} and/or that
  it relays a large fraction of available {USENET} newsgroups.
  `Well-known' can be almost synonymous, but also implies that the
  site's name is familiar to many (due perhaps to an archive service
  or active USENET users).

wetware: /wet'weir/ [prob. from the novels of Rudy Rucker] n.
  1. The human nervous system, as opposed to computer hardware or
  software.  "Wetware has 7 plus or minus 2 temporary registers."
  2. Human beings (programmers, operators, administrators) attached
  to a computer system, as opposed to the system's hardware or
  software.  See {liveware}, {meatware}.

whacker: [University of Maryland: from {hacker}] n. 1. A person,
  similar to a {hacker}, who enjoys exploring the details of
  programmable systems and how to stretch their capabilities.
  Whereas a hacker tends to produce great hacks, a whacker only ends
  up whacking the system or program in question.  Whackers are often
  quite egotistical and eager to claim {wizard} status,
  regardless of the views of their peers.  2. A person who is good at
  programming quickly, though rather poorly and ineptly.

whales: n. See {like kicking dead whales down the beach}.

wheel: [from slang `big wheel' for a powerful person] n. A
  person who has an active a {wheel bit}.  "We need to find a
  wheel to un{wedge} the hung tape drives."

wheel bit: n. A privilege bit that allows the possessor to perform
  some restricted operation on a timesharing system, such as read or
  write any file on the system regardless of protections, change or
  look at any address in the running monitor, crash or reload the
  system, and kill or create jobs and user accounts.  The term was
  invented on the TENEX operating system, and carried over to
  TOPS-20, XEROX-IFS, and others.  The state of being in a privileged
  logon is sometimes called `wheel mode'.  This term entered the
  UNIX culture from TWENEX in the mid-1980s and has been gaining
  popularity there (esp. at university sites).  See also {root}.

wheel wars: [Stanford University] A period in {larval stage}
  during which student hackers hassle each other by attempting to log
  each other out of the system, delete each other's files, and
  otherwise wreak havoc, usually at the expense of the lesser users.

White Book: n. Syn. {K&R}.

whizzy: [Sun] adj. (alt. `wizzy') Describes a {cuspy} program;
  one that is feature-rich and well presented.

WIBNI: // [Bell Labs: Wouldn't It Be Nice If] n. What most
  requirements documents and specifications consist entirely of.
  Compare {IWBNI}.

widget: n. 1. A meta-thing.  Used to stand for a real object in
  didactic examples (especially database tutorials).  Legend has it
  that the original widgets were holders for buggy whips.  "But
  suppose the parts list for a widget has 52 entries...."
  2. [poss. evoking `window gadget'] A user interface object in
  {X} graphical user interfaces.

wiggles: n. [scientific computation] In solving partial differential
  equations by finite difference and similar methods, wiggles are
  sawtooth (up-down-up-down) oscillations at the shortest wavelength
  representable on the grid.  If an algorithm is unstable, this is
  often the most unstable waveform, so it grows to dominate the
  solution.  Alternatively, stable (though inaccurate) wiggles can be
  generated near a discontinuity by a Gibbs phenomenon.

WIMP environment: n. [acronymic from `Window, Icon, Menu, Pointing
  device (or Pull-down menu)'] A graphical-user-interface-based
  environment such as {X} or the Macintosh interface, as described
  by a hacker who prefers command-line interfaces for their superior
  flexibility and extensibility.  See {menuitis},
  {user-obsequious}.

win: [MIT] 1. vi. To succeed.  A program wins if no unexpected
  conditions arise, or (especially) if it sufficiently {robust} to
  take exceptions in stride.  2. n. Success, or a specific instance
  thereof.  A pleasing outcome.  A {feature}.  Emphatic forms:
  `moby win', `super win', `hyper-win' (often used
  interjectively as a reply).  For some reason `suitable win' is
  also common at MIT, usually in reference to a satisfactory solution
  to a problem.  Oppose {lose}; see also {big win}, which isn't
  quite just an intensification of `win'.

win big: vi. To experience serendipity.  "I went shopping and won
  big; there was a 2-for-1 sale." See {big win}.

win win: interj. Expresses pleasure at a {win}.

Winchester:: n. Informal generic term for `floating-head'
  magnetic-disk drives in which the read-write head planes over the
  disk surface on an air cushion.  The name arose because the
  original 1973 engineering prototype for what later became the
  IBM 3340 featured two 30-megabyte volumes; 30--30 became
  `Winchester' when somebody noticed the similarity to the common
  term for a famous Winchester rifle (in the latter, the first 30
  referred to caliber and the second to the grain weight of the
  charge).

winged comments: n. Comments set on the same line as code, as
  opposed to {boxed comments}.  In C, for example:

    d = sqrt(x*x + y*y);  /* distance from origin */

  Generally these refer only to the action(s) taken on that line.

winkey: n. (alt. `winkey face')  See {emoticon}.

winnage: /win'*j/ n. The situation when a lossage is corrected, or
  when something is winning.

winner: 1. n. An unexpectedly good situation, program, programmer,
  or person.  "So it turned out I could use a {lexer} generator
  instead of hand-coding my own pattern recognizer.  What a win!"
  2. `real winner': Often sarcastic, but also used as high praise
  (see also the note under {user}). "He's a real winner --- never
  reports a bug till he can duplicate it and send in an
  example."

winnitude: /win'*-t[y]ood/ n. The quality of winning (as opposed
  to {winnage}, which is the result of winning).  "Guess what?
  They tweaked the microcode and now the LISP interpreter runs twice
  as fast as it used to." "That's really great!  Boy, what
  winnitude!" "Yup. I'll probably get a half-hour's winnage on the
  next run of my program."  Perhaps curiously, the obvious antonym
  `lossitude' is rare.

wired: n. See {hardwired}.

wirehead: /wi:r'hed/ n. [prob. from SF slang for an
  electrical-brain-stimulation addict] 1. A hardware hacker,
  especially one who concentrates on communications hardware.  2. An
  expert in local-area networks.  A wirehead can be a network
  software wizard too, but will always have the ability to deal with
  network hardware, down to the smallest component.  Wireheads are
  known for their ability to lash up an Ethernet terminator from
  spare resistors, for example.

wish list: n. A list of desired features or bug fixes that probably
  won't get done for a long time, usually because the person
  responsible for the code is too busy or can't think of a clean way
  to do it.  "OK, I'll add automatic filename completion to the wish
  list for the new interface." Compare {tick-list features}.

within delta of: adj. See {delta}.

within epsilon of: adj. See {epsilon}.

wizard: n. 1. A person who knows how a complex piece of software
  or hardware works (that is, who {grok}s it); esp. someone who
  can find and fix bugs quickly in an emergency.  Someone is a
  {hacker} if he or she has general hacking ability, but is a wizard
  with respect to something only if he or she has specific detailed
  knowledge of that thing.  A good hacker could become a wizard for
  something given the time to study it.  2. A person who is permitted
  to do things forbidden to ordinary people; one who has {wheel}
  privileges on a system.  3. A UNIX expert, esp. a UNIX systems
  programmer.  This usage is well enough established that `UNIX
  Wizard' is a recognized job title at some corporations and to most
  headhunters.  See {guru}, {lord high fixer}.  See also
  {deep magic}, {heavy wizardry}, {incantation}, {magic},
  {mutter}, {rain dance}, {voodoo programming}, {wave a
  dead chicken}.

Wizard Book: n. Hal Abelson and Jerry Sussman's `Structure
  and Interpretation of Computer Programs' (MIT Press, 1984; ISBN
  0-262-01077-1, an excellent computer science text used in
  introductory courses at MIT.  So called because of the wizard on
  the jacket.  One of the {bible}s of the LISP/Scheme
  world.

wizard mode: [from {rogue}] n. A special access mode of a program or
  system, usually passworded, that permits some users godlike
  privileges.  Generally not used for operating systems themselves
  (`root mode' or `wheel mode' would be used instead).

wizardly: adj. Pertaining to wizards.  A wizardly {feature} is one
  that only a wizard could understand or use properly.

womb box: n. 1. [TMRC] Storage space for equipment.  2. [proposed]
  A variety of hard-shell equipment case with heavy interior padding
  and/or shaped carrier cutouts in a foam-rubber matrix; mundanely
  called a `flight case'.  Used for delicate test equipment,
  electronics, and musical instruments.

WOMBAT: [Waste Of Money, Brains, And Time] adj. Applied to problems
  which are both profoundly {uninteresting} in themselves and
  unlikely to benefit anyone interesting even if solved.  Often used
  in fanciful constructions such as `wrestling with a wombat'.  See
  also {crawling horror}, {SMOP}.  Also note the rather different
  usage as a meta-syntactic variable in {{Commonwealth Hackish}}.

wonky: /wong'kee/ [from Australian slang] adj. Yet another
  approximate synonym for {broken}.  Specifically connotes a
  malfunction that produces behavior seen as crazy, humorous, or
  amusingly perverse.  "That was the day the printer's font logic
  went wonky and everybody's listings came out in Tengwar."  Also in
  `wonked out'.  See {funky}, {demented}, {bozotic}.

workaround: n. A temporary {kluge} inserted in a system under
  development or test in order to avoid the effects of a {bug} or
  {misfeature} so that work can continue.  Theoretically,
  workarounds are always replaced by {fix}es; in practice,
  customers often find themselves living with workarounds in the
  first couple of releases.  "The code died on NUL characters in the
  input, so I fixed it to interpret them as spaces."  "That's not a
  fix, that's a workaround!"

working as designed: [IBM] adj. 1. In conformance to a wrong or
  inappropriate specification; useful, but misdesigned.
  2. Frequently used as a sardonic comment on a program's utility.
  3. Unfortunately also used as a bogus reason for not accepting a
  criticism or suggestion.  At {IBM}, this sense is used in
  official documents!  See {BAD}.

worm: [from `tapeworm' in John Brunner's novel `The
  Shockwave Rider', via XEROX PARC] n. A program that propagates
  itself over a network, reproducing itself as it goes.  Compare
  {virus}.  Nowadays the term has negative connotations, as it is
  assumed that only {cracker}s write worms.  Perhaps the
  best-known example was Robert T. Morris's `Internet Worm' of 1988,
  a `benign' one that got out of control and hogged hundreds of
  Suns and VAXen across the U.S.  See also {cracker}, {RTM},
  {Trojan horse}, {ice}.

wound around the axle: adj. In an infinite loop.  Often used by older
  computer types.

wrap around: vi. (also n. `wraparound' and v. shorthand `wrap')
  1. [techspeak] The action of a counter that starts over at zero or at
  `minus infinity' (see {infinity}) after its maximum value has
  been reached, and continues incrementing, either because it is
  programmed to do so or because of an overflow (as when a car's
  odometer starts over at 0).  2. To change {phase} gradually and
  continuously by maintaining a steady wake-sleep cycle somewhat
  longer than 24 hours, e.g., living six long (28-hour) days in a week
  (or, equivalently, sleeping at the rate of 10 microhertz).

write-only code: [a play on `read-only memory'] n. Code so
  arcane, complex, or ill-structured that it cannot be modified or
  even comprehended by anyone but its author, and possibly not even
  by him/her.  A {Bad Thing}.

write-only language: n. A language with syntax (or semantics)
  sufficiently dense and bizarre that any routine of significant size
  is {write-only code}.  A sobriquet applied occasionally to C and
  often to APL, though {INTERCAL} and {TECO} certainly deserve it
  more.

write-only memory: n. The obvious antonym to `read-only
  memory'.  Out of frustration with the long and seemingly useless
  chain of approvals required of component specifications, during
  which no actual checking seemed to occur, an engineer at Signetics
  once created a specification for a write-only memory and included
  it with a bunch of other specifications to be approved.  This
  inclusion came to the attention of Signetics {management} only
  when regular customers started calling and asking for pricing
  information.  Signetics published a corrected edition of the data
  book and requested the return of the `erroneous' ones.  Later,
  around 1974, Signetics bought a double-page spread in `Electronics'
  magazine's April issue and used the spec as an April Fools' Day
  joke.  Instead of the more conventional characteristic curves, the
  25120 "fully encoded, 9046 x N, Random Access, write-only-memory"
  data sheet included diagrams of "bit capacity vs. Temp.",
  "Iff vs. Vff", "Number of pins remaining vs. number of socket
  insertions", and "AQL vs. selling price".  The 25120 required a
  6.3 VAC VFF supply, a +10V VCC, and VDD of 0V,
  +/- 2%.

Wrong Thing: n. A design, action, or decision that is clearly
  incorrect or inappropriate.  Often capitalized; always emphasized
  in speech as if capitalized.  The opposite of the {Right Thing};
  more generally, anything that is not the Right Thing.  In cases
  where `the good is the enemy of the best', the merely good --- although
  good --- is nevertheless the Wrong Thing. "In C, the default is for
  module-level declarations to be visible everywhere, rather than
  just within the module.  This is clearly the Wrong Thing."

wugga wugga: /wuh'g* wuh'g*/ n. Imaginary sound that a computer
  program makes as it labors with a tedious or difficult task.
  Compare {cruncha cruncha cruncha}, {grind} (sense 4).

WYSIWYG: /wiz'ee-wig/ adj. Describes a user interface under which
  "What You See Is What You Get", as opposed to one that uses
  more-or-less obscure commands which do not result in immediate
  visual feedback.  The term can be mildly derogatory, as it is often
  used to refer to dumbed-down {user-friendly} interfaces targeted
  at non-programmers; a hacker has no fear of obscure commands.
  On the other hand, EMACS was one of the very first WYSIWYG editors,
  replacing (actually, at first overlaying) the extremely obscure,
  command-based {TECO}.  See also {WIMP environment}.  [Oddly
  enough, this term has already made it into the OED. --- ESR]

= X =
=====

X: /X/ n. 1. Used in various speech and writing contexts (also
  in lowercase) in roughly its algebraic sense of `unknown within a
  set defined by context' (compare {N}).  Thus, the abbreviation
  680x0 stands for 68000, 68010, 68020, 68030, or 68040, and 80x86
  stands for 80186, 80286 80386 or 80486 (note that a UNIX hacker
  might write these as 680[0-4]0 and 80[1-4]86 or 680?0 and 80?86
  respectively; see {glob}).  2. [after the name of an earlier
  window system called `W'] An over-sized, over-featured,
  over-engineered and incredibly over-complicated window system
  developed at MIT and widely used on UNIX systems.

XOFF: /X'of/ n. Syn. {control-s}.

xor: /X'or/, /kzor/ conj. Exclusive or.  `A xor B' means
  `A or B, but not both'.  "I want to get cherry pie xor a
  banana split."  This derives from the technical use of the term as
  a function on truth-values that is true if exactly one of its two
  arguments is true.

xref: /X'ref/ vt., n. Hackish standard abbreviation for
  `cross-reference'.

XXX: /X-X-X/ n. A marker that attention is needed.
  Commonly used in program comments to indicate areas that are kluged
  up or need to be.  Some hackers liken `XXX' to the notional
  heavy-porn movie rating.

xyzzy: /X-Y-Z-Z-Y/, /X-Y-ziz'ee/, /ziz'ee/, or /ik-ziz'ee/
  [from the ADVENT game] adj.  The {canonical} `magic word'.
  This comes from {ADVENT}, in which the idea is to explore an
  underground cave with many rooms and to collect the treasures you
  find there.  If you type `xyzzy' at the appropriate time, you can
  move instantly between two otherwise distant points.  If, therefore,
  you encounter some bit of {magic}, you might remark on this
  quite succinctly by saying simply "Xyzzy!"  "Ordinarily you
  can't look at someone else's screen if he has protected it, but if
  you type quadruple-bucky-clear the system will let you do it
  anyway."  "Xyzzy!"  Xyzzy has actually been implemented as an
  undocumented no-op command on several OSes; in Data General's
  AOS/VS, for example, it would typically respond "Nothing
  happens", just as {ADVENT} did if the magic was invoked at the
  wrong spot or before a player had performed the action that enabled
  the word.  See also {plugh}.

= Y =
=====

YA-: [Yet Another] abbrev. In hackish acronyms this almost
  invariably expands to {Yet Another}, following the precedent set
  by UNIX `yacc(1)'.  See {YABA}.

YABA: /ya'b*/ [Cambridge] n. Yet Another Bloody Acronym.  Whenever
  some program is being named, someone invariably suggests that it be
  given a name that is acronymic.  The response from those with a
  trace of originality is to remark ironically that the proposed name
  would then be `YABA-compatible'.  Also used in response to questions
  like "What is WYSIWYG?"  See also {TLA}.

YAUN: /yawn/ [Acronym for `Yet Another UNIX Nerd'] n. Reported
  from the San Diego Computer Society (predominantly a microcomputer
  users' group) as a good-natured punning insult aimed at UNIX
  zealots.

Yellow Book: [proposed] n. The print version of this Jargon File;
  `The New Hacker's Dictionary', forthcoming from MIT Press,
  1991.  Includes all the material in the File, plus a Foreword by
  Guy L.  Steele and a Preface by Eric S. Raymond.  Most importantly,
  the book version is nicely typeset and includes almost all of the
  infamous Crunchly cartoons by the Great Quux, each attached to an
  appropriate entry.

Yet Another: adj. [From UNIX's `yacc(1)', `Yet Another Compiler-
  Compiler', a LALR parser generator]  1. Of your own work: A humorous
  allusion often used in titles to acknowledge that the topic is not
  original, though the content is.  As in `Yet Another AI Group'
  or `Yet Another Simulated Annealing Algorithm'.  2. Of others'
  work: Describes something of which there are far too many.  See
  also {YA-}, {YABA}, {YAUN}.

You are not expected to understand this: cav. [UNIX] The canonical
  comment describing something {magic} or too complicated to
  bother explaining properly.  From an infamous comment in the
  context-switching code of the V6 UNIX kernel.

You know you've been hacking too long when...: The set-up line
  for a genre of one-liners told by hackers about themselves.  These
  include the following:

  * not only do you check your email more often than your paper
    mail, but you remember your {network address} faster than your
    postal one.
  * your {SO} kisses you on the neck and the first thing you
    think is "Uh, oh, {priority interrupt}."
  * you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're
    doing it in octal.
  * your computers have a higher street value than your car.
  * in your universe, `round numbers' are powers of 2, not 10.
  * more than once, you have woken up recalling a dream in
    some programming language.
  * you realize you have never seen half of your best friends.

  [An early version of this entry said "All but one of these
  have been reliably reported as hacker traits (some of them quite
  often).  Even hackers may have trouble spotting the ringer."  The
  ringer was balancing one's checkbook in octal, which I made up out
  of whole cloth.  Although more respondents picked that one
  out as fiction than any of the others, I also received multiple
  independent reports of its actually happening. --- ESR]

Your mileage may vary: cav. [from the standard disclaimer attached
  to EPA mileage ratings by American car manufacturers] 1. A ritual
  warning often found in UNIX freeware distributions.  Translates
  roughly as "Hey, I tried to write this portably, but who
  *knows* what'll happen on your system?"  2. A qualifier more
  generally attached to advice.  "I find that sending flowers works
  well, but your mileage may vary."

Yow!: /yow/ [from "Zippy the Pinhead" comix] interj. A favored hacker
  expression of humorous surprise or emphasis.  "Yow!  Check out what
  happens when you twiddle the foo option on this display hack!"
  Compare {gurfle}.

yoyo mode: n. The state in which the system is said to be when it
  rapidly alternates several times between being up and being down.
  Interestingly (and perhaps not by coincidence), many hardware
  vendors give out free yoyos at Usenix exhibits.

  Sun Microsystems gave out logoized yoyos at SIGPLAN '88.  Tourists
  staying at one of Atlanta's most respectable hotels were
  subsequently treated to the sight of 200 of the country's top
  computer scientists testing yo-yo algorithms in the lobby.

Yu-Shiang Whole Fish: /yoo-shyang hohl fish/ n. obs. The
  character gamma (extended SAIL ASCII 0001001), which with a loop in
  its tail looks like a little fish swimming down the page.  The term
  is actually the name of a Chinese dish in which a fish is cooked
  whole (not {parse}d) and covered with Yu-Shiang (or Yu-Hsiang)
  sauce.  Usage: primarily by people on the MIT LISP Machine, which
  could display this character on the screen.  Tends to elicit
  incredulity from people who hear about it second-hand.

= Z =
=====

zap: 1. n. Spiciness.  2. vt. To make food spicy.  3. vt. To make
  someone `suffer' by making his food spicy.  (Most hackers love
  spicy food.  Hot-and-sour soup is considered wimpy unless it makes
  you wipe your nose for the rest of the meal.)  See {zapped}.
  4. vt. To modify, usually to correct; esp. used when the action
  is performed with a debugger or binary patching tool.  Also implies
  surgical precision.  "Zap the debug level to 6 and run it again."
  In the IBM mainframe world, binary patches are applied to programs
  or to the OS with a program called `superzap', whose file name is
  `IMASPZAP' (I M A SuPerZAP).  5. vt. To erase or reset.  6. To
  {fry} a chip with static electricity. "Uh oh --- I think that
  lightning strike may have zapped the disk controller."

zapped: adj. Spicy.  This term is used to distinguish between food
  that is hot (in temperature) and food that is *spicy*-hot.
  For example, the Chinese appetizer Bon Bon Chicken is a kind of
  chicken salad that is cold but zapped; by contrast, {vanilla}
  wonton soup is hot but not zapped.  See also {{oriental food}},
  {laser chicken}.  See {zap}, senses 1 and 2.

zen: vt. To figure out something by meditation or by a sudden flash
  of enlightenment.  Originally applied to bugs, but occasionally
  applied to problems of life in general.  "How'd you figure out the
  buffer allocation problem?"  "Oh, I zenned it."  Contrast {grok},
  which connotes a time-extended version of zenning a system.
  Compare {hack mode}.  See also {guru}.

zero: vt. 1. To set to 0.  Usually said of small pieces of data,
  such as bits or words (esp. in the construction `zero out').  2. To
  erase; to discard all data from.  Said of disks and directories,
  where `zeroing' need not involve actually writing zeroes throughout
  the area being zeroed.  One may speak of something being
  `logically zeroed' rather than being `physically zeroed'.  See
  {scribble}.

zero-content: adj. Syn. {content-free}.

zeroth: /zee'rohth/ adj. First.  Among software designers, comes
  from C's and LISP's 0-based indexing of arrays.  Hardware people
  also tend to start counting at 0 instead of 1; this is natural
  since, e.g., the 256 states of 8 bits correspond to the binary
  numbers 0, 1, ..., 255 and the digital devices known as `counters'
  count in this way.

  Hackers and computer scientists often like to call the first
  chapter of a publication `chapter 0', especially if it is of an
  introductory nature (one of the classic instances was in the First
  Edition of {K&R}).  In recent years this trait has also been
  observed among many pure mathematicians (who have an independent
  tradition of numbering from 0).  Zero-based numbering tends to
  reduce {fencepost error}s, though it cannot eliminate them
  entirely.

zigamorph: /zig'*-morf/ n. Hex FF (11111111) when used as a
  delimiter or {fence} character.  Usage: primarily at IBM
  shops.

zip: [primarily MS-DOS] vt. To create a compressed archive from a
  group of files using PKWare's PKZIP or a compatible archiver.  Its
  use is spreading now that portable implementations of the algorithm
  have been written.  Commonly used as follows: "I'll zip it up and
  send it to you."  See {arc}, {tar and feather}.

zipperhead: [IBM] n. A person with a closed mind.

zombie: [UNIX] n. A process that has died but has not yet
  relinquished its process table slot (because the parent process
  hasn't executed a `wait(2)' for it yet).  These can be seen in
  `ps(1)' listings occasionally.  Compare {orphan}.

zorch: /zorch/ 1. [TMRC] v. To attack with an inverse heat sink.
  2. [TMRC] v. To travel, with v approaching c [that
  is, with velocity approaching lightspeed --- ESR].  3. [MIT] v. To
  propel something very quickly.  "The new comm software is very
  fast; it really zorches files through the network."  4. [MIT] n.
  Influence.  Brownie points.  Good karma.  The intangible and fuzzy
  currency in which favors are measured.  "I'd rather not ask him
  for that just yet; I think I've used up my quota of zorch with him
  for the week."  5. [MIT] n. Energy, drive, or ability.  "I think
  I'll {punt} that change for now; I've been up for 30 hours
  and I've run out of zorch."

Zork: /zork/ n. The second of the great early experiments in computer
  fantasy gaming; see {ADVENT}.  Originally written on MIT-DM
  during the late 1970s, later distributed with BSD UNIX and
  commercialized as `The Zork Trilogy' by Infocom.

zorkmid: /zork'mid/ n. The canonical unit of currency in
  hacker-written games.  This originated in {zork} but has spread
  to {nethack} and is referred to in several other games.

= [^A-Za-z] (see {regexp}) =
============================

'Snooze: /snooz/ [FidoNet] n. Fidonews, the weekly official on-line
  newsletter of FidoNet.  As the editorial policy of Fidonews is
  "anything that arrives, we print", there are often large articles
  completely unrelated to FidoNet, which in turn tend to elicit
  {flamage} in subsequent issues.

(TM): // [USENET] ASCII rendition of the trademark-superscript symbol
  appended to phrases that the author feels should be recorded for
  posterity, perhaps in future editions of this lexicon.  Sometimes
  used ironically as a form of protest against the recent spate of
  software and algorithm patents and `look and feel' lawsuits.  See
  also {UN*X}.

-oid: [from `android'] suff. 1. This suffix is used as in
  mainstream English to indicate a poor imitation, a counterfeit, or
  some otherwise slightly bogus resemblance.  Hackers will happily
  use it with all sorts of non-Greco/Latin stem words that wouldn't
  keep company with it in mainstream English.  For example, "He's a
  nerdoid" means that he superficially resembles a nerd but can't
  make the grade; a `modemoid' might be a 300-baud box (Real Modems
  run at 9600); a `computeroid' might be any {bitty box}.  The
  word `keyboid' could be used to describe a {chiclet keyboard},
  but would have to be written; spoken, it would confuse the listener
  as to the speaker's city of origin.  2. There is a more specific
  sense of `oid' as an indicator for `resembling an android'
  which in the past has been confined to science-fiction fans and
  hackers.  It too has recently (in 1991) started to go mainstream
  (most notably in the term `trendoid' for victims of terminal
  hipness).  This is probably traceable to the popularization of the
  term {droid} in "Star Wars" and its sequels.

  Coinages in both forms have been common in science fiction for at
  least fifty years, and hackers (who are often SF fans) have
  probably been making `-oid' jargon for almost that long
  [though GLS and I can personally confirm only that they were
  already common in the mid-1970s --- ESR].

-ware: [from `software'] suff. Commonly used to form jargon terms
  for classes of software.  For examples, see {careware},
  {crippleware}, {crudware}, {freeware}, {fritterware},
  {guiltware}, {liveware}, {meatware}, {payware},
  {psychedelicware}, {shareware}, {shelfware}, {vaporware},
  {wetware}.

/dev/null: /dev-nuhl/ [from the UNIX null device, used as a data
  sink] n. A notional `black hole' in any information space being
  discussed, used, or referred to.  A controversial posting, for
  example, might end "Kudos to [email protected], flames to
  /dev/null".  See {bit bucket}.

120 reset: /wuhn-twen'tee ree'set/ [from 120 volts, U.S. wall
  voltage] n. To cycle power on a machine in order to reset or unjam
  it.  Compare {Big Red Switch}, {power cycle}.

2: infix. In translation software written by hackers, infix 2 often
  represents the syllable *to* with the connotation
  `translate to': as in dvi2ps (DVI to PostScript), int2string
  (integer to string), and texi2roff (Texinfo to [nt]roff).

@-party: /at'par`tee/ [from the @-sign in an Internet address]
  n.  (alt. `@-sign party' /at'si:n par`tee/) A semi-closed
  party thrown for hackers at a science-fiction convention (esp.
  the annual Worldcon); one must have a {network address} to
  get in, or at least be in company with someone who does.  One of
  the most reliable opportunities for hackers to meet face to face
  with people who might otherwise be represented by mere phosphor
  dots on their screens.  Compare {boink}.

@Begin: // See {\begin}.

\begin: // [from the LaTeX command] With \end, used
  humorously in writing to indicate a context or to remark on the
  surrounded text.  For example:

    \begin{flame}
    Predicate logic is the only good programming
    language.  Anyone who would use anything else
    is an idiot.  Also, all computers should be
    tredecimal instead of binary.
    \end{flame}

  The Scribe users at CMU and elsewhere used to use @Begin/@End in
  an identical way (LaTeX was built to resemble Scribe).  On USENET,
  this construct would more frequently be rendered as `<FLAME ON>'
  and `<FLAME OFF>'.



Appendix A: Hacker Folklore
***************************

This appendix contains several legends and fables that illuminate the
meaning of various entries in the lexicon.

The Meaning of `Hack'
=====================

"The word {hack} doesn't really have 69 different meanings", according
to MIT hacker Phil Agre.  "In fact, {hack} has only one meaning, an
extremely subtle and profound one which defies articulation.  Which
connotation is implied by a given use of the word depends in similarly
profound ways on the context.  Similar remarks apply to a couple of
other hacker words, most notably {random}."

Hacking might be characterized as `an appropriate application of
ingenuity'.  Whether the result is a quick-and-dirty patchwork job or a
carefully crafted work of art, you have to admire the cleverness that
went into it.

An important secondary meaning of {hack} is `a creative practical joke'.
This kind of hack is easier to explain to non-hackers than the
programming kind.  Of course, some hacks have both natures; see the
lexicon entries for {pseudo} and {kgbvax}.  But here are some examples
of pure practical jokes that illustrate the hacking spirit:

    In 1961, students from Caltech (California Institute of Technology,
    in Pasadena) hacked the Rose Bowl football game.  One student posed
    as a reporter and `interviewed' the director of the University of
    Washington card stunts (such stunts involve people in the stands
    who hold up colored cards to make pictures).  The reporter learned
    exactly how the stunts were operated, and also that the director
    would be out to dinner later.

    While the director was eating, the students (who called themselves
    the `Fiendish Fourteen') picked a lock and stole a blank direction
    sheet for the card stunts.  They then had a printer run off 2300
    copies of the blank.  The next day they picked the lock again and
    stole the master plans for the stunts --- large sheets of graph
    paper colored in with the stunt pictures.  Using these as a guide,
    they made new instructions for three of the stunts on the
    duplicated blanks.  Finally, they broke in once more, replacing the
    stolen master plans and substituting the stack of diddled
    instruction sheets for the original set.

    The result was that three of the pictures were totally different.
    Instead of `WASHINGTON', the word ``CALTECH' was flashed.  Another
    stunt showed the word `HUSKIES', the Washington nickname, but
    spelled it backwards.  And what was supposed to have been a picture
    of a husky instead showed a beaver.  (Both Caltech and MIT use the
    beaver --- nature's engineer --- as a mascot.)

    After the game, the Washington faculty athletic representative
    said: "Some thought it ingenious; others were indignant."  The
    Washington student body president remarked: "No hard feelings, but
    at the time it was unbelievable.  We were amazed."

This is now considered a classic hack, particularly because revising the
direction sheets constituted a form of programming.

Here is another classic hack:

    On November 20, 1982, MIT hacked the Harvard-Yale football game.
    Just after Harvard's second touchdown against Yale, in the first
    quarter, a small black ball popped up out of the ground at the
    40-yard line, and grew bigger, and bigger, and bigger.  The letters
    `MIT' appeared all over the ball.  As the players and officials
    stood around gawking, the ball grew to six feet in diameter and
    then burst with a bang and a cloud of white smoke.

    The `Boston Globe' later reported: "If you want to know the truth,
    MIT won The Game."

    The prank had taken weeks of careful planning by members of MIT's
    Delta Kappa Epsilon fraternity.  The device consisted of a weather
    balloon, a hydraulic ram powered by Freon gas to lift it out of the
    ground, and a vacuum-cleaner motor to inflate it.  They made eight
    separate expeditions to Harvard Stadium between 1 and 5 A.M.,
    locating an unused 110-volt circuit in the stadium and running
    buried wires from the stadium circuit to the 40-yard line, where
    they buried the balloon device.  When the time came to activate the
    device, two fraternity members had merely to flip a circuit breaker
    and push a plug into an outlet.

    This stunt had all the earmarks of a perfect hack: surprise,
    publicity, the ingenious use of technology, safety, and
    harmlessness.  The use of manual control allowed the prank to be
    timed so as not to disrupt the game (it was set off between plays,
    so the outcome of the game would not be unduly affected).  The
    perpetrators had even thoughtfully attached a note to the balloon
    explaining that the device was not dangerous and contained no
    explosives.

    Harvard president Derek Bok commented: "They have an awful lot of
    clever people down there at MIT, and they did it again."  President
    Paul E. Gray of MIT said: "There is absolutely no truth to the
    rumor that I had anything to do with it, but I wish there were."

The hacks above are verifiable history; they can be proved to have
happened.  Many other classic-hack stories from MIT and elsewhere,
though retold as history, have the characteristics of what Jan Brunvand
has called `urban folklore' (see {FOAF}).  Perhaps the best known of
these is the legend of the infamous trolley-car hack, an alleged
incident in which engineering students are said to have welded a trolley
car to its tracks with thermite.  Numerous versions of this have been
recorded from the 1940s to the present, most set at MIT but at least one
very detailed version set at CMU.

Brian Leibowitz has researched MIT hacks both real and mythical
extensively; the interested reader is referred to his delightful
pictorial compendium `The Journal of the Institute for Hacks,
Tomfoolery, and Pranks' (MIT Museum, 1990; ISBN 0-917027-03-5).

Finally, here is a story about one of the classic computer hacks.

    Back in the mid-1970s, several of the system support staff at
    Motorola discovered a relatively simple way to crack system
    security on the Xerox CP-V timesharing system.  Through a simple
    programming strategy, it was possible for a user program to trick
    the system into running a portion of the program in `master mode'
    (supervisor state), in which memory protection does not apply.  The
    program could then poke a large value into its `privilege level'
    byte (normally write-protected) and could then proceed to bypass
    all levels of security within the file-management system, patch the
    system monitor, and do numerous other interesting things.  In
    short, the barn door was wide open.

    Motorola quite properly reported this problem to Xerox via an
    official `level 1 SIDR' (a bug report with an intended urgency of
    `needs to be fixed yesterday').  Because the text of each SIDR was
    entered into a database that could be viewed by quite a number of
    people, Motorola followed the approved procedure: they simply
    reported the problem as `Security SIDR', and attached all of the
    necessary documentation, ways-to-reproduce, etc.

    The CP-V people at Xerox sat on their thumbs; they either didn't
    realize the severity of the problem, or didn't assign the necessary
    operating-system-staff resources to develop and distribute an
    official patch.

    Months passed.  The Motorola guys pestered their Xerox
    field-support rep, to no avail.  Finally they decided to take
    direct action, to demonstrate to Xerox management just how easily
    the system could be cracked and just how thoroughly the security
    safeguards could be subverted.

    They dug around in the operating-system listings and devised a
    thoroughly devilish set of patches.  These patches were then
    incorporated into a pair of programs called `Robin Hood' and `Friar
    Tuck'.  Robin Hood and Friar Tuck were designed to run as `ghost
    jobs' (daemons, in UNIX terminology); they would use the existing
    loophole to subvert system security, install the necessary patches,
    and then keep an eye on one another's statuses in order to keep the
    system operator (in effect, the superuser) from aborting them.

    One fine day, the system operator on the main CP-V software
    development system in El Segundo was surprised by a number of
    unusual phenomena.  These included the following:

       * Tape drives would rewind and dismount their tapes in the
         middle of a job.
       * Disk drives would seek back and forth so rapidly that they
         would attempt to walk across the floor (see {walking drives}).
       * The card-punch output device would occasionally start up of
         itself and punch a {lace card}.  These would usually jam in
         the punch.
       * The console would print snide and insulting messages from
         Robin Hood to Friar Tuck, or vice versa.
       * The Xerox card reader had two output stackers; it could be
         instructed to stack into A, stack into B, or stack into A
         (unless a card was unreadable, in which case the bad card was
         placed into stacker B).  One of the patches installed by the
         ghosts added some code to the card-reader driver... after
         reading a card, it would flip over to the opposite stacker.
         As a result, card decks would divide themselves in half when
         they were read, leaving the operator to recollate them
         manually.

    Naturally, the operator called in the operating-system developers.
    They found the bandit ghost jobs running, and X'ed them... and were
    once again surprised.  When Robin Hood was X'ed, the following
    sequence of events took place:

         !X id1

         id1: Friar Tuck... I am under attack!  Pray save me!
         id1: Off (aborted)

         id2: Fear not, friend Robin!  I shall rout the Sheriff
              of Nottingham's men!

         id1: Thank you, my good fellow!

    Each ghost-job would detect the fact that the other had been
    killed, and would start a new copy of the recently slain program
    within a few milliseconds.  The only way to kill both ghosts was to
    kill them simultaneously (very difficult) or to deliberately crash
    the system.

    Finally, the system programmers did the latter --- only to find
    that the bandits appeared once again when the system rebooted!  It
    turned out that these two programs had patched the boot-time OS
    image (the kernel file, in UNIX terms) and had added themselves to
    the list of programs that were to be started at boot time.

    The Robin Hood and Friar Tuck ghosts were finally eradicated when
    the system staff rebooted the system from a clean boot-tape and
    reinstalled the monitor.  Not long thereafter, Xerox released a
    patch for this problem.

    It is alleged that Xerox filed a complaint with Motorola's management about
    the merry-prankster actions of the two employees in question.  It is
    not recorded that any serious disciplinary action was taken against
    either of them.

TV Typewriters: A Tale of Hackish Ingenuity
===========================================

Here is a true story about a glass tty: One day an MIT hacker was in a
motorcycle accident and broke his leg.  He had to stay in the hospital
quite a while, and got restless because he couldn't {hack}.  Two of his
friends therefore took a terminal and a modem for it to the hospital, so
that he could use the computer by telephone from his hospital bed.

Now this happened some years before the spread of home computers, and
computer terminals were not a familiar sight to the average person.
When the two friends got to the hospital, a guard stopped them and asked
what they were carrying.  They explained that they wanted to take a
computer terminal to their friend who was a patient.

The guard got out his list of things that patients were permitted to
have in their rooms: TV, radio, electric razor, typewriter, tape player,
.. no computer terminals.  Computer terminals weren't on the list, so
the guard wouldn't let it in.  Rules are rules, you know.  (This guard
was clearly a {droid}.)

Fair enough, said the two friends, and they left again.  They were
frustrated, of course, because they knew that the terminal was as
harmless as a TV or anything else on the list... which gave them an
idea.

The next day they returned, and the same thing happened: a guard stopped
them and asked what they were carrying.  They said: "This is a TV
typewriter!"  The guard was skeptical, so they plugged it in and
demonstrated it.  "See?  You just type on the keyboard and what you type
shows up on the TV screen."  Now the guard didn't stop to think about
how utterly useless a typewriter would be that didn't produce any paper
copies of what you typed; but this was clearly a TV typewriter, no doubt
about it.  So he checked his list: "A TV is all right, a typewriter is
all right ... okay, take it on in!"

Two Stories About `Magic' (by GLS)
==================================

Some years ago, I was snooping around in the cabinets that housed the
MIT AI Lab's PDP-10, and noticed a little switch glued to the frame of
one cabinet.  It was obviously a homebrew job, added by one of the lab's
hardware hackers (no one knows who).

You don't touch an unknown switch on a computer without knowing what it
does, because you might crash the computer.  The switch was labeled in a
most unhelpful way.  It had two positions, and scrawled in pencil on the
metal switch body were the words `magic' and `more magic'.  The switch
was in the `more magic' position.

I called another hacker over to look at it.  He had never seen the
switch before either.  Closer examination revealed that the switch had
only one wire running to it!  The other end of the wire did disappear
into the maze of wires inside the computer, but it's a basic fact of
electricity that a switch can't do anything unless there are two wires
connected to it.  This switch had a wire connected on one side and no
wire on its other side.

It was clear that this switch was someone's idea of a silly joke.
Convinced by our reasoning that the switch was inoperative, we flipped
it.  The computer instantly crashed.

Imagine our utter astonishment.  We wrote it off as coincidence, but
nevertheless restored the switch to the `more magic' position before
reviving the computer.

A year later, I told this story to yet another hacker, David Moon as I
recall.  He clearly doubted my sanity, or suspected me of a supernatural
belief in the power of this switch, or perhaps thought I was fooling him
with a bogus saga.  To prove it to him, I showed him the very switch,
still glued to the cabinet frame with only one wire connected to it,
still in the `more magic' position.  We scrutinized the switch and its
lone connection, and found that the other end of the wire, though
connected to the computer wiring, was connected to a ground pin.  That
clearly made the switch doubly useless: not only was it electrically
nonoperative, but it was connected to a place that couldn't affect
anything anyway.  So we flipped the switch.

The computer promptly crashed.

This time we ran for Richard Greenblatt, a long-time MIT hacker, who was
close at hand.  He had never noticed the switch before, either.  He
inspected it, concluded it was useless, got some diagonal cutters and
{dike}d it out.  We then revived the computer and it has run fine ever
since.

We still don't know how the switch crashed the machine.  There is a
theory that some circuit near the ground pin was marginal, and
flipping the switch changed the electrical capacitance enough to upset
the circuit as millionth-of-a-second pulses went through it.  But
we'll never know for sure; all we can really say is that the switch
was {magic}.

I still have that switch in my basement.  Maybe I'm silly, but I
usually keep it set on `more magic'.

A Selection of AI Koans
=======================

These are some of the funniest examples of a genre of jokes told at the
MIT AI Lab about various noted hackers.  The original koans were
composed by Danny Hillis.  In reading these, it is at least useful to
know that Minsky, Sussman, and Drescher are AI researchers of note, that
Tom Knight was one of the Lisp machine's principal designers, and that
David Moon wrote much of Lisp machine Lisp.

                                * * *

  A novice was trying to fix a broken Lisp machine by turning the power
off and on.

  Knight, seeing what the student was doing, spoke sternly: "You cannot
fix a machine by just power-cycling it with no understanding of what is
going wrong."

  Knight turned the machine off and on.

  The machine worked.

                                * * *

  One day a student came to Moon and said: "I understand how to make a
better garbage collector.  We must keep a reference count of the
pointers to each cons."

Moon patiently told the student the following story:

    "One day a student came to Moon and said: `I understand how to make
    a better garbage collector...

[Ed. note: Pure reference-count garbage collectors have problems with
circular structures that point to themselves.]

                                * * *

In the days when Sussman was a novice, Minsky once came to him as he sat
hacking at the PDP-6.

  "What are you doing?", asked Minsky.

  "I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe"
Sussman replied.

  "Why is the net wired randomly?", asked Minsky.

  "I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play", Sussman
said.

  Minsky then shut his eyes.

  "Why do you close your eyes?", Sussman asked his teacher.

  "So that the room will be empty."

  At that moment, Sussman was enlightened.

                                * * *

  A disciple of another sect once came to Drescher as he was eating his
morning meal.

  "I would like to give you this personality test", said the outsider,
"because I want you to be happy."

  Drescher took the paper that was offered him and put it into the
toaster, saying: "I wish the toaster to be happy, too."

OS and JEDGAR
=============

This story says a lot about the the ITS ethos.

On the ITS system there was a program that allowed you to see what was
being printed on someone else's terminal.  It spied on the other guy's
output by examining the insides of the monitor system.  The output spy
program was called OS.  Throughout the rest of the computer science (and
at IBM too) OS means `operating system', but among old-time ITS hackers
it almost always meant `output spy'.

OS could work because ITS purposely had very little in the way of
`protection' that prevented one user from trespassing on another's
areas.  Fair is fair, however.  There was another program that would
automatically notify you if anyone started to spy on your output.  It
worked in exactly the same way, by looking at the insides of the
operating system to see if anyone else was looking at the insides that
had to do with your output.  This `counterspy' program was called JEDGAR
(a six-letterism pronounced as two syllables: /jed'gr/), in honor of the
former head of the FBI.

But there's more.  JEDGAR would ask the user for `license to kill'.  If
the user said yes, then JEDGAR would actually {gun} the job of the
{luser} who was spying.  Unfortunately, people found that this made life
too violent, especially when tourists learned about it.  One of the
systems hackers solved the problem by replacing JEDGAR with another
program that only pretended to do its job.  It took a long time to do
this, because every copy of JEDGAR had to be patched.  To this day no
one knows how many people never figured out that JEDGAR had been
defanged.

The Story of Mel, a Real Programmer
===================================

This was posted to USENET by its author, Ed Nather (utastro!nather), on
May 21, 1983.


    A recent article devoted to the *macho* side of programming
    made the bald and unvarnished statement:

        Real Programmers write in FORTRAN.

    Maybe they do now,
    in this decadent era of
    Lite beer, hand calculators, and "user-friendly" software
    but back in the Good Old Days,
    when the term "software" sounded funny
    and Real Computers were made out of drums and vacuum tubes,
    Real Programmers wrote in machine code.
    Not FORTRAN. Not RATFOR.  Not, even, assembly language.
    Machine Code.
    Raw, unadorned, inscrutable hexadecimal numbers.
    Directly.

    Lest a whole new generation of programmers
    grow up in ignorance of this glorious past,
    I feel duty-bound to describe,
    as best I can through the generation gap,
    how a Real Programmer wrote code.
    I'll call him Mel,
    because that was his name.

    I first met Mel when I went to work for Royal McBee Computer Corp.,
    a now-defunct subsidiary of the typewriter company.
    The firm manufactured the LGP-30,
    a small, cheap (by the standards of the day)
    drum-memory computer,
    and had just started to manufacture
    the RPC-4000, a much-improved,
    bigger, better, faster --- drum-memory computer.
    Cores cost too much,
    and weren't here to stay, anyway.
    (That's why you haven't heard of the company, or the computer.)

    I had been hired to write a FORTRAN compiler
    for this new marvel and Mel was my guide to its wonders.
    Mel didn't approve of compilers.

    "If a program can't rewrite its own code",
    he asked, "what good is it?"

    Mel had written,
    in hexadecimal,
    the most popular computer program the company owned.
    It ran on the LGP-30
    and played blackjack with potential customers
    at computer shows.
    Its effect was always dramatic.
    The LGP-30 booth was packed at every show,
    and the IBM salesmen stood around
    talking to each other.
    Whether or not this actually sold computers
    was a question we never discussed.

    Mel's job was to re-write
    the blackjack program for the RPC-4000.
    (Port?  What does that mean?)
    The new computer had a one-plus-one
    addressing scheme,
    in which each machine instruction,
    in addition to the operation code
    and the address of the needed operand,
    had a second address that indicated where, on the revolving drum,
    the next instruction was located.

    In modern parlance,
    every single instruction was followed by a GO TO!
    Put *that* in Pascal's pipe and smoke it.

    Mel loved the RPC-4000
    because he could optimize his code:
    that is, locate instructions on the drum
    so that just as one finished its job,
    the next would be just arriving at the "read head"
    and available for immediate execution.
    There was a program to do that job,
    an "optimizing assembler",
    but Mel refused to use it.

    "You never know where it's going to put things",
    he explained, "so you'd have to use separate constants".

    It was a long time before I understood that remark.
    Since Mel knew the numerical value
    of every operation code,
    and assigned his own drum addresses,
    every instruction he wrote could also be considered
    a numerical constant.
    He could pick up an earlier "add" instruction, say,
    and multiply by it,
    if it had the right numeric value.
    His code was not easy for someone else to modify.

    I compared Mel's hand-optimized programs
    with the same code massaged by the optimizing assembler program,
    and Mel's always ran faster.
    That was because the "top-down" method of program design
    hadn't been invented yet,
    and Mel wouldn't have used it anyway.
    He wrote the innermost parts of his program loops first,
    so they would get first choice
    of the optimum address locations on the drum.
    The optimizing assembler wasn't smart enough to do it that way.

    Mel never wrote time-delay loops, either,
    even when the balky Flexowriter
    required a delay between output characters to work right.
    He just located instructions on the drum
    so each successive one was just *past* the read head
    when it was needed;
    the drum had to execute another complete revolution
    to find the next instruction.
    He coined an unforgettable term for this procedure.
    Although "optimum" is an absolute term,
    like "unique", it became common verbal practice
    to make it relative:
    "not quite optimum" or "less optimum"
    or "not very optimum".
    Mel called the maximum time-delay locations
    the "most pessimum".

    After he finished the blackjack program
    and got it to run
    ("Even the initializer is optimized",
    he said proudly),
    he got a Change Request from the sales department.
    The program used an elegant (optimized)
    random number generator
    to shuffle the "cards" and deal from the "deck",
    and some of the salesmen felt it was too fair,
    since sometimes the customers lost.
    They wanted Mel to modify the program
    so, at the setting of a sense switch on the console,
    they could change the odds and let the customer win.

    Mel balked.
    He felt this was patently dishonest,
    which it was,
    and that it impinged on his personal integrity as a programmer,
    which it did,
    so he refused to do it.
    The Head Salesman talked to Mel,
    as did the Big Boss and, at the boss's urging,
    a few Fellow Programmers.
    Mel finally gave in and wrote the code,
    but he got the test backwards,
    and, when the sense switch was turned on,
    the program would cheat, winning every time.
    Mel was delighted with this,
    claiming his subconscious was uncontrollably ethical,
    and adamantly refused to fix it.

    After Mel had left the company for greener pa$ture$,
    the Big Boss asked me to look at the code
    and see if I could find the test and reverse it.
    Somewhat reluctantly, I agreed to look.
    Tracking Mel's code was a real adventure.

    I have often felt that programming is an art form,
    whose real value can only be appreciated
    by another versed in the same arcane art;
    there are lovely gems and brilliant coups
    hidden from human view and admiration, sometimes forever,
    by the very nature of the process.
    You can learn a lot about an individual
    just by reading through his code,
    even in hexadecimal.
    Mel was, I think, an unsung genius.

    Perhaps my greatest shock came
    when I found an innocent loop that had no test in it.
    No test.  *None*.
    Common sense said it had to be a closed loop,
    where the program would circle, forever, endlessly.
    Program control passed right through it, however,
    and safely out the other side.
    It took me two weeks to figure it out.

    The RPC-4000 computer had a really modern facility
    called an index register.
    It allowed the programmer to write a program loop
    that used an indexed instruction inside;
    each time through,
    the number in the index register
    was added to the address of that instruction,
    so it would refer
    to the next datum in a series.
    He had only to increment the index register
    each time through.
    Mel never used it.

    Instead, he would pull the instruction into a machine register,
    add one to its address,
    and store it back.
    He would then execute the modified instruction
    right from the register.
    The loop was written so this additional execution time
    was taken into account ---
    just as this instruction finished,
    the next one was right under the drum's read head,
    ready to go.
    But the loop had no test in it.

    The vital clue came when I noticed
    the index register bit,
    the bit that lay between the address
    and the operation code in the instruction word,
    was turned on ---
    yet Mel never used the index register,
    leaving it zero all the time.
    When the light went on it nearly blinded me.

    He had located the data he was working on
    near the top of memory ---
    the largest locations the instructions could address ---
    so, after the last datum was handled,
    incrementing the instruction address
    would make it overflow.
    The carry would add one to the
    operation code, changing it to the next one in the instruction set:
    a jump instruction.
    Sure enough, the next program instruction was
    in address location zero,
    and the program went happily on its way.

    I haven't kept in touch with Mel,
    so I don't know if he ever gave in to the flood of
    change that has washed over programming techniques
    since those long-gone days.
    I like to think he didn't.
    In any event,
    I was impressed enough that I quit looking for the
    offending test,
    telling the Big Boss I couldn't find it.
    He didn't seem surprised.

    When I left the company,
    the blackjack program would still cheat
    if you turned on the right sense switch,
    and I think that's how it should be.
    I didn't feel comfortable
    hacking up the code of a Real Programmer.


This is one of hackerdom's great heroic epics, free verse or no.  In a
few spare images it captures more about the esthetics and psychology of
hacking than all the scholarly volumes on the subject put together.  For
an opposing point of view, see the entry for {real programmer}.

Appendix B: A Portrait of J. Random Hacker
******************************************

This profile reflects detailed comments on an earlier `trial balloon'
version from about a hundred USENET respondents.  Where comparatives are
used, the implicit `other' is a randomly selected segment of the
non-hacker population of the same size as hackerdom.

An important point: Except in some relatively minor respects such as
slang vocabulary, hackers don't get to be the way they are by imitating
each other.  Rather, it seems to be the case that the combination of
personality traits that makes a hacker so conditions one's outlook on
life that one tends to end up being like other hackers whether one wants
to or not (much as bizarrely detailed similarities in behavior and
preferences are found in genetic twins raised separately).


General Appearance
==================

Intelligent.  Scruffy.  Intense.  Abstracted.  Surprisingly for a
sedentary profession, more hackers run to skinny than fat; both
extremes are more common than elsewhere.  Tans are rare.


Dress
=====

Casual, vaguely post-hippie; T-shirts, jeans, running shoes,
Birkenstocks (or bare feet).  Long hair, beards, and moustaches are
common.  High incidence of tie-dye and intellectual or humorous `slogan'
T-shirts (only rarely computer related; that would be too obvious).

A substantial minority prefers `outdoorsy' clothing --- hiking boots
("in case a mountain should suddenly spring up in the machine room", as
one famous parody put it), khakis, lumberjack or chamois shirts, and the
like.

Very few actually fit the `National Lampoon' Nerd stereotype, though it
lingers on at MIT and may have been more common before 1975.  These
days, backpacks are more common than briefcases, and the hacker `look'
is more whole-earth than whole-polyester.

Hackers dress for comfort, function, and minimal maintenance hassles
rather than for appearance (some, perhaps unfortunately, take this to
extremes and neglect personal hygiene).  They have a very low tolerance
of suits and other `business' attire; in fact, it is not uncommon for
hackers to quit a job rather than conform to a dress code.

Female hackers almost never wear visible makeup, and many use none at
all.


Reading Habits
==============

Omnivorous, but usually includes lots of science and science fiction.
The typical hacker household might subscribe to `Analog', `Scientific
American', `Co-Evolution Quarterly', and `Smithsonian'.  Hackers often
have a reading range that astonishes liberal arts people but tend not to
talk about it as much.  Many hackers spend as much of their spare time
reading as the average American burns up watching TV, and often keep
shelves and shelves of well-thumbed books in their homes.


Other Interests
===============

Some hobbies are widely shared and recognized as going with the culture:
science fiction, music, medievalism, chess, go, backgammon, wargames,
and intellectual games of all kinds.  (Role-playing games such as
Dungeons and Dragons used to be extremely popular among hackers but they
lost a bit of their luster as they moved into the mainstream and became
heavily commercialized.)  Logic puzzles.  Ham radio.  Other interests
that seem to correlate less strongly but positively with hackerdom
include linguistics and theater teching.


Physical Activity and Sports
============================

Many (perhaps even most) hackers don't follow or do sports at all and
are determinedly anti-physical.  Among those who do, interest in
spectator sports is low to non-existent; sports are something one
*does*, not something one watches on TV.

Further, hackers avoid most team sports like the plague (volleyball is a
notable exception, perhaps because it's non-contact and relatively
friendly).  Hacker sports are almost always primarily self-competitive
ones involving concentration, stamina, and micromotor skills: martial
arts, bicycling, auto racing, kite flying, hiking, rock climbing,
aviation, target-shooting, sailing, caving, juggling, skiing, skating
(ice and roller).  Hackers' delight in techno-toys also tends to draw
them towards hobbies with nifty complicated equipment that they can
tinker with.


Education
=========

Nearly all hackers past their teens are either college-degreed or
self-educated to an equivalent level.  The self-taught hacker is often
considered (at least by other hackers) to be better-motivated, and may
be more respected, than his school-shaped counterpart.  Academic areas
from which people often gravitate into hackerdom include (besides the
obvious computer science and electrical engineering) physics,
mathematics, linguistics, and philosophy.


Things Hackers Detest and Avoid
===============================

IBM mainframes.  Smurfs, Ewoks, and other forms of offensive cuteness.
Bureaucracies.  Stupid people.  Easy listening music.  Television
(except for cartoons, movies, the old "Star Trek", and the new
"Simpsons").  Business suits.  Dishonesty.  Incompetence.
Boredom.  COBOL. BASIC.  Character-based menu interfaces.


Food
====

Ethnic.  Spicy.  Oriental, esp. Chinese and most esp. Szechuan, Hunan,
and Mandarin (hackers consider Cantonese vaguely d'eclass'e).  Hackers
prefer the exotic; for example, the Japanese-food fans among them will
eat with gusto such delicacies as fugu (poisonous pufferfish) and whale.
Thai food has experienced flurries of popularity.  Where available,
high-quality Jewish delicatessen food is much esteemed.  A visible
minority of Southwestern and Pacific Coast hackers prefers Mexican.

For those all-night hacks, pizza and microwaved burritos are big.
Interestingly, though the mainstream culture has tended to think of
hackers as incorrigible junk-food junkies, many have at least mildly
health-foodist attitudes and are fairly discriminating about what they
eat.  This may be generational; anecdotal evidence suggests that the
stereotype was more on the mark 10--15 years ago.


Politics
========

Vaguely left of center, except for the strong libertarian contingent
which rejects conventional left-right politics entirely.  The only safe
generalization is that hackers tend to be rather anti-authoritarian;
thus, both conventional conservatism and `hard' leftism are rare.
Hackers are far more likely than most non-hackers to either (a) be
aggressively apolitical or (b) entertain peculiar or idiosyncratic
political ideas and actually try to live by them day-to-day.


Gender and Ethnicity
====================

Hackerdom is still predominantly male.  However, the percentage of women
is clearly higher than the low-single-digit range typical for technical
professions, and female hackers are generally respected and dealt with
as equals.

In the U.S., hackerdom is predominantly Caucasian with strong minorities
of Jews (East Coast) and Orientals (West Coast).  The Jewish contingent
has exerted a particularly pervasive cultural influence (see Food,
above, and note that several common jargon terms are obviously mutated
Yiddish).

The ethnic distribution of hackers is understood by them to be a
function of which ethnic groups tend to seek and value education.
Racial and ethnic prejudice is notably uncommon and tends to be met with
freezing contempt.

When asked, hackers often ascribe their culture's gender- and
color-blindness to a positive effect of text-only network channels.


Religion
========


Agnostic.  Atheist.  Non-observant Jewish.  Neo-pagan.  Very commonly,
three or more of these are combined in the same person.  Conventional
faith-holding Christianity is rare though not unknown.

Even hackers who identify with a religious affiliation tend to be
relaxed about it, hostile to organized religion in general and all forms
of religious bigotry in particular.  Many enjoy `parody' religions such
as Discordianism and the Church of the SubGenius.

Also, many hackers are influenced to varying degrees by Zen Buddhism or
(less commonly) Taoism, and blend them easily with their `native'
religions.

There is a definite strain of mystical, almost Gnostic sensibility that
shows up even among those hackers not actively involved with
neo-paganism, Discordianism, or Zen.  Hacker folklore that pays homage
to `wizards' and speaks of incantations and demons has too much
psychological truthfulness about it to be entirely a joke.


Ceremonial Chemicals
====================

Most hackers don't smoke tobacco, and use alcohol in moderation if at
all (though there is a visible contingent of exotic-beer fanciers, and a
few hackers are serious oenophiles).  Limited use of non-addictive
psychedelic drugs, such as cannabis, LSD, psilocybin, and nitrous oxide,
etc., used to be relatively common and is still regarded with more
tolerance than in the mainstream culture.  Use of `downers' and opiates,
on the other hand, appears to be particularly rare; hackers seem in
general to dislike drugs that `dumb them down'.  On the third hand, many
hackers regularly wire up on caffeine and/or sugar for all-night hacking
runs.


Communication Style
===================

See the discussions of speech and writing styles near the beginning of
this File.  Though hackers often have poor person-to-person
communication skills, they are as a rule extremely sensitive to nuances
of language and very precise in their use of it.  They are often better
at writing than at speaking.


Geographical Distribution
=========================

In the United States, hackerdom revolves on a Bay Area-to-Boston axis;
about half of the hard core seems to live within a hundred miles of
Cambridge (Massachusetts) or Berkeley (California), although there are
significant contingents in Los Angeles, in the Pacific Northwest, and
around Washington DC.  Hackers tend to cluster around large cities,
especially `university towns' such as the Raleigh-Durham area in North
Carolina or Princeton, New Jersey (this may simply reflect the fact that
many are students or ex-students living near their alma maters).


Sexual Habits
=============

Hackerdom tolerates a much wider range of sexual and lifestyle variation
than the mainstream culture.  It includes a relatively large gay
contingent.  Hackers are somewhat more likely to live in polygynous or
polyandrous relationships, practice open marriage, or live in communes
or group houses.  In this, as in general appearance, hackerdom
semi-consciously maintains `counterculture' values.


Personality Characteristics
===========================

The most obvious common `personality' characteristics of hackers are
high intelligence, consuming curiosity, and facility with intellectual
abstractions.  Also, most hackers are `neophiles', stimulated by and
appreciative of novelty (especially intellectual novelty).  Most are
also relatively individualistic and anti-conformist.

Although high general intelligence is common among hackers, it is not
the sine qua non one might expect.  Another trait is probably even more
important: the ability to mentally absorb, retain, and reference large
amounts of `meaningless' detail, trusting to later experience to give it
context and meaning.  A person of merely average analytical intelligence
who has this trait can become an effective hacker, but a creative genius
who lacks it will swiftly find himself outdistanced by people who
routinely upload the contents of thick reference manuals into their
brains.  [During the production of this book, for example, I learned
most of the rather complex typesetting language TeX over about four
working days, mainly by inhaling Knuth's 477-page manual.  My editor's
flabbergasted reaction to this genuinely surprised me, because years of
associating with hackers have conditioned me to consider such
performances routine and to be expected. --- ESR]

Contrary to stereotype, hackers are *not* usually intellectually narrow;
they tend to be interested in any subject that can provide mental
stimulation, and can often discourse knowledgeably and even
interestingly on any number of obscure subjects --- if you can get them
to talk at all, as opposed to, say, going back to their hacking.

It is noticeable (and contrary to many outsiders' expectations) that the
better a hacker is at hacking, the more likely he or she is to have
outside interests at which he or she is more than merely competent.

Hackers are `control freaks' in a way that has nothing to do with the
usual coercive or authoritarian connotations of the term.  In the same
way that children delight in making model trains go forward and back by
moving a switch, hackers love making complicated things like computers
do nifty stuff for them.  But it has to be *their* nifty stuff.  They
don't like tedium, nondeterminism, or most of the fussy, boring,
ill-defined little tasks that go with maintaining a normal existence.
Accordingly, they tend to be careful and orderly in their intellectual
lives and chaotic elsewhere.  Their code will be beautiful, even if
their desks are buried in 3 feet of crap.

Hackers are generally only very weakly motivated by conventional rewards
such as social approval or money.  They tend to be attracted by
challenges and excited by interesting toys, and to judge the interest of
work or other activities in terms of the challenges offered and the toys
they get to play with.

In terms of Myers-Briggs and equivalent psychometric systems, hackerdom
appears to concentrate the relatively rare INTJ and INTP types; that is,
introverted, intuitive, and thinker types (as opposed to the
extroverted-sensate personalities that predominate in the mainstream
culture).  ENT[JP] types are also concentrated among hackers but are in
a minority.


Weaknesses of the Hacker Personality
====================================

Hackers have relatively little ability to identify emotionally with
other people.  This may be because hackers generally aren't much like
`other people'.  Unsurprisingly, hackers also tend towards
self-absorption, intellectual arrogance, and impatience with people and
tasks perceived to be wasting their time.

As cynical as hackers sometimes wax about the amount of idiocy in the
world, they tend by reflex to assume that everyone is as rational,
`cool', and imaginative as they consider themselves.  This bias often
contributes to weakness in communication skills.  Hackers tend to be
especially poor at confrontation and negotiation.

As a result of all the above traits, many hackers have difficulty
maintaining stable relationships.  At worst, they can produce the
classic {computer geek}: withdrawn, relationally incompetent, sexually
frustrated, and desperately unhappy when not submerged in his or her
craft.  Fortunately, this extreme is far less common than mainstream
folklore paints it --- but almost all hackers will recognize something
of themselves in the unflattering paragraphs above.

Hackers are often monumentally disorganized and sloppy about dealing
with the physical world.  Bills don't get paid on time, clutter piles up
to incredible heights in homes and offices, and minor maintenance tasks
get deferred indefinitely.

The sort of person who uses phrases like `incompletely socialized'
usually thinks hackers are.  Hackers regard such people with contempt
when they notice them at all.


Miscellaneous
=============

Hackers are more likely to have cats than dogs (in fact, it is widely
grokked that cats have the hacker nature).  Many drive incredibly
decrepit heaps and forget to wash them; richer ones drive spiffy
Porsches and RX-7s and then forget to have them washed.  Almost all
hackers have terribly bad handwriting, and often fall into the habit of
block-printing everything like junior draftsmen.

Bibliography
************

Here are some other books you can read to help you understand the hacker
mindset.


    `G"odel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid'
    Douglas Hofstadter
    Basic Books, 1979
    ISBN 0-394-74502-7


This book reads like an intellectual Grand Tour of hacker
preoccupations.  Music, mathematical logic, programming, speculations on
the nature of intelligence, biology, and Zen are woven into a brilliant
tapestry themed on the concept of encoded self-reference.  The perfect
left-brain companion to `Illuminatus'.


    `The Illuminatus Trilogy'
        I.   `The Eye in the Pyramid'
        II.  `The Golden Apple'
        III. `Leviathan'.
    Robert Shea and Robert Anton Wilson
    Dell, 1988
    ISBN 0-440-53981-1


This work of alleged fiction is an incredible berserko-surrealist
rollercoaster of world-girdling conspiracies, intelligent dolphins, the
fall of Atlantis, who really killed JFK, sex, drugs, rock'n'roll, and
the Cosmic Giggle Factor.  First published in three volumes, but there
is now a one-volume trade paperback, carried by most chain bookstores
under SF.  The perfect right-brain companion to Hofstadter's `G"odel,
Escher, Bach'.  See {Eris}, {Discordianism}, {random numbers}, {Church
Of The Sub-Genius}.


    `The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy'
    Douglas Adams
    Pocket Books, 1981
    ISBN 0-671-46149-4


This `Monty Python in Space' spoof of SF genre traditions has been
popular among hackers ever since the original British radio show.  Read
it if only to learn about Vogons (see {bogons}) and the significance of
the number 42 (see {random numbers}) --- and why the winningest chess
program of 1990 was called `Deep Thought'.


    `The Tao of Programming'
    James Geoffrey
    Infobooks, 1987
    ISBN 0-931137-07-1


This gentle, funny spoof of the `Tao Te Ching' contains much that is
illuminating about the hacker way of thought.  "When you have learned to
snatch the error code from the trap frame, it will be time for you to
leave."


    `Hackers'
    Steven Levy
    Anchor/Doubleday 1984
    ISBN 0-385-19195-2


Levy's book is at its best in describing the early MIT hackers at the
Model Railroad Club and the early days of the microcomputer revolution.
He never understood UNIX or the networks, though, and his enshrinement
of Richard Stallman as "the last true hacker" turns out (thankfully) to
have been quite misleading.  Numerous minor factual errors also mar the
text; for example, Levy's claim that the original Jargon File derived
from the TMRC Dictionary (the File originated at Stanford and was
brought to MIT in 1976; the co-authors of the first edition had never
seen the dictionary in question).  There are also numerous misspellings
in the book that inflame the passions of old-timers; as Dan Murphy, the
author of TECO, once said: "You would have thought he'd take the trouble
to spell the name of a winning editor right."  Nevertheless, this
remains a useful and stimulating book that captures the feel of several
important hackish subcultures.


    `The Devil's DP Dictionary'
    Stan Kelly-Bootle
    McGraw-Hill, 1981
    ISBN 0-07-034022-6


This pastiche of Ambrose Bierce's famous work is similar in format to
the Jargon File (and quotes several entries from jargon-1) but
somewhat different in tone and intent.  It is more satirical and less
anthropological, and is largely a product of the author's literate and
quirky imagination.  For example, it defines `computer science' as
"a study akin to numerology and astrology, but lacking the precision
of the former and the success of the latter" and "the boring
art of coping with a large number of trivialities."


    `The Devouring Fungus: Tales from the Computer Age'
    Karla Jennings
    Norton, 1990
    ISBN 0-393-30732-8


The author of this pioneering compendium knits together a great deal of
computer- and hacker-related folklore with good writing and a few
well-chosen cartoons.  She has a keen eye for the human aspects of the
lore and is very good at illuminating the psychology and evolution of
hackerdom.  Unfortunately, a number of small errors and awkwardnesses
suggest that she didn't have the final manuscript checked over by a
native speaker; the glossary in the back is particularly embarrassing,
and at least one classic tale (the Magic Switch story, retold here in
appendix A) is given in incomplete and badly mangled form.
Nevertheless, this book is a win overall and can be enjoyed by hacker
and non-hacker alike.


    `The Soul of a New Machine'
    Tracy Kidder
    Little, Brown, 1981
    (paperback: Avon, 1982
    ISBN 0-380-59931-7)


This book (a 1982 Pulitzer Prize winner) documents the adventure of the
design of a new Data General computer, the Eclipse.  It is an amazingly
well-done portrait of the hacker mindset --- although largely the
hardware hacker --- done by a complete outsider.  It is a bit thin in
spots, but with enough technical information to be entertaining to the
serious hacker while providing non-technical people a view of what
day-to-day life can be like --- the fun, the excitement, the disasters.
During one period, when the microcode and logic were glitching at the
nanosecond level, one of the overworked engineers departed the company,
leaving behind a note on his terminal as his letter of resignation: "I
am going to a commune in Vermont and will deal with no unit of time
shorter than a season."


    `Life with UNIX: a Guide for Everyone'
    Don Libes and Sandy Ressler
    Prentice-Hall, 1989
    ISBN 0-13-536657-7


The authors of this book set out to tell you all the things about UNIX
that tutorials and technical books won't.  The result is gossipy,
funny, opinionated, downright weird in spots, and invaluable.  Along
the way they expose you to enough of UNIX's history, folklore and
humor to qualify as a first-class source for these things.  Because so
much of today's hackerdom is involved with UNIX, this in turn
illuminates many of its in-jokes and preoccupations.


    `True Names ... and Other Dangers'
    Vernor Vinge
    Baen Books, 1987
    ISBN 0-671-65363


Hacker demigod Richard Stallman believes the title story of this book
"expresses the spirit of hacking best".  This may well be true; it's
certainly difficult to recall a better job.  The other stories in this
collection are also fine work by an author who is perhaps one of
today's very best practitioners of hard SF.


    `Technobabble'
    John Barry
    MIT Press 1991
    ISBN 0-262-02333-4


Barry's book takes a critical and humorous look at the `technobabble'
of acronyms, neologisms, hyperbole, and metaphor spawned by the
computer industry.  Though he discusses some of the same mechanisms of
jargon formation that occur in hackish, most of what he chronicles is
actually suit-speak --- the obfuscatory language of press releases,
marketroids, and Silicon Valley CEOs rather than the playful jargon of
hackers (most of whom wouldn't be caught dead uttering the kind of
pompous, passive-voiced word salad he deplores).


    `The Cuckoo's Egg'
    Clifford Stoll
    Doubleday 1989
    ISBN 0-385-24946-2


Clifford Stoll's absorbing tale of how he tracked Markus Hess and the
Chaos Club cracking ring nicely illustrates the difference between
`hacker' and `cracker'.  Stoll's portrait of himself, his lady Martha,
and his friends at Berkeley and on the Internet paints a marvelously
vivid picture of how hackers and the people around them like to live
and what they think.

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