FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:28           Page 1

       Volume 2, Number 33                        30 September 1985
       +----------------------------------------------------------+
       |                                             _            |
       |                                            /  \          |
       |    - FidoNews -                           /|oo \         |
       |                                          (_|  /_)        |
       |  Fido and FidoNet                         _`@/_ \    _   |
       |    Users  Group                          |     | \   \\  |
       |     Newsletter                           | (*) |  \   )) |
       |                             ______       |__U__| /  \//  |
       |                            / FIDO \       _//|| _\   /   |
       |                           (________)     (_/(_|(____/    |
       |                                                (jm)      |
       +----------------------------------------------------------+

       Publisher:              Fido 107/7
       Chief Procrastinator:   Thom Henderson

       Fidonews is published weekly by SEAboard,  Fido  107/7.  You
       are   encouraged  to  submit  articles  for  publication  in
       Fidonews.  Article submission standards are contained in the
       file FIDONEWS.DOC, available from Fido 107/7.

       Disclaimer or don't-blame-us:

       The contents of the articles  contained  here  are  not  our
       responsibility,  nor  do  we  necessarily  agree  with them;
       everything here is subject to debate.  We publish EVERYTHING
       received.





                           Daylight Losing Time


       This  coming  October  27th is the day when Daylight Savings
       Time ends, at the ungodly hour of 2 AM (on a Sunday morning,
       no less).

       Once again we engage in our twice  yearly  shifting  of  the
       network  mail  hour,  with  its  usual  confusion.  For  the
       record,  the "approved" procedure is to set your clock  back
       one  hour  sometime between Saturday morning mail and Sunday
       morning mail (anytime during the day Saturday is cool).

       But,  inevitably,  some people will forget,  one or two will
       set  their  clocks the wrong way,  and many won't be able to
       reach their machines until  Monday  anyway.  (Many  business
       boards  are  in  company  areas that can't be reached on the
       weekend.  Do they change their clocks on Friday before  they
       leave, or Monday when they get back?  Who knows?)

       Our  little  semiannual ritual also has other drawbacks.  It
       seems Hawaii doesn't observe daylight savings time, and they
       are far enough west that the summer shift  has  them  making







FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:31           Page 2

       VERY long distance calls at the more expensive evening rate.

       Just  to  make  life  even more fun,  I'm told that parts of
       Indiana, Kansas, Texas, Florida,  Michigan,  and Alaska also
       do not observe daylight savings time.

       So here's my suggestion, if it's not already obvious:  Let's
       go ahead and get off of daylight savings  time  this  month,
       and from then on forget about it.  If anybody complains,  we
       can tell them that we're really running on  Greenwhich  Mean
       Time  (or  Universal Coordinated Time,  as it's called these
       days).

       All this changing of clocks just isn't worth the hassle.  So
       the clock on your system doesn't match  the  clock  on  your
       wall,   so   big  deal!   The  users  will  never  know  the
       difference, since it's hard to get the time of day from Fido
       anyway.  [Could one then say that Fido wouldn't give you the
       time of day?  Some other editorial, perhaps. . .]













































FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:32           Page 3

       ============================================================
                                 NEWS
       ============================================================
                        Greetings from

                       Mike's "C" Board
                      Net 102 / Node 201
                         619-722-8724

        The latest release of Fido,  ver 11, has reimplemented the
       scrolling  download/upload display as default.  When it was
       taken  away a few versions back I was glad to walk  in  and
       see what was being downloaded or uploaded but would have no
       idea  where  in  the transfer the user was.  But  this  was
       better  than "Sending block 134" and not knowing  what  was
       being  transferred or whether there where 650 blocks or  10
       blocks  left.  Well now with the new version I can have  my
       cake  and eat it too!
         The  following  is the patch I applied to Fido using  the
       Norton  Utilities 3.0 program "NU".  I couldn't figure  out
       how  to  do this with debug because of the  Plink  overlays
       used in Fido.

         1.  Copy  Fido to a blank disk and invoke NU B:  or  what
       ever disk Fido is on. This insures that the program will be
       stored contigously.

         2.  Next  press F1 then F3 to select a file and place the
       highlighted  bar over FIDO_IBM.EXE.  Press return  and  you
       will be back at the TOP MENU.

         3. Next press F2 then F4 to display information about the
       file.  The  4th  line  down contains the  starting  cluster
       number  with the sector number in parentheses.  Add 197  to
       the sector number in parentheses and write the result down.

         4.  Now  press  ESC then F1 then F5 to place you  in  the
       Select  Disk  Sector  menu and enter the number  you  noted
       earlier.   Press  enter  and then F5 to  enter  the  Change
       Contents mode.

         5. You should see all the usual messages that continually
       scroll  by  as a file transfer is  taking  place.  Pressing
       enter  twice will place you in the edit mode.  From here we
       can  do  some  interesting things to Fido  to  enhance  the
       existing display.  About 3/4 way down you will see  TIMEOUT
       followed by two funny characters that are a carriage return
       and newline (0D0A).  Change the second one, that looks like
       an  O in reverse video to a space or hex 20 and do the same
       following  "Sending  block #%u" two lines  down  and  after
       "ACK" on the same line. These changes will make the display
       overwrite  the  existing line during transfers  giving  the
       effect  of  only  the  current block  number  changing  and
       eliminating  the scrolling off the screen of the file  name
       and number of total blocks.

        6.  If  you really want to be creative you can change  the







FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:34           Page 4

       Data  Block %u,  which I believe is used for  upload  along
       with the "ACK character = %u" which I truncated to "ACK=%u"
       and  null terminated and added the hex 0D before the  null.
       The  message "Sending filename" also should be done to take
       of the Telink protocal transfers.  Also what I have done is
       by  hitting  the  PgDn  key  (Entering  W  for  write  when
       requested  to  save  the changes) you will  see  the "-----
       Yelling  at sysop ----" message the user see's when  the  C
       key is pressed. I have changed it to "---- Hello... This is
       Mike ----" making the interruption much more friendly.

         7.  When  finished  press ESC and answer W to  write  the
       changes  to  disk and you have the new enhanced version  of
       Fido!!!

        Though these patches are simple they accomplish  something
       I  have asked for in fido,  but fell on deaf ears.   I keep
       hearing  rumors  of  Fido look alikes in  the  making  with
       source  and  all the bells and whisles you can  only  dream
       were in Fido,  with full net compatibility. Tom has created
       a  work of art that is worth recognition,  but lets have  a
       masterpiece.
         If you don't have Norton Utilities 3.0 I highly recommend
       purchasing it, as I have found it to be a fascinating tool.
       This  patch was only done on the IBM version but  could  be
       easily applied to the DEC version as well.

                         Enjoy!!   Mike Elkins



       ------------------------------------------------------------
































FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:35           Page 5



                      The UN*X Gateway is Complete!
                             by Bob Hartman
                           Sysop Fido 132/101
                          The UN*X Gateway BBS

               This is the news you UN*X hackers have been waiting
       for - the UN*X Gateway BBS is now capable of sending FidoNet
       mail on to UN*X systems as well as receiving UN*X mail to be
       sent via FidoNet!  In the past only the latter (UN*X->Fido)
       was working.  In order to use the gateway you must do the
       following:

       Sending Fido to UN*X:

       1.  Send a FidoNet message addressed to "Usenet" on the UN*X
           Gateway Fido (132/101).  The addressee of Usenet is what
           the system keys on, so make sure you get it right!
       2.  The first line of the message must be the UN*X UUCP path
           to be used to send the message.  This must be the only
           thing on the first line!  The path does not have to be
           complete as the host will try to figure out the best
           routing for the message, but the addresses to major hosts
           would be:
               encore!decvax
           or  encore!decvax!ucbvax
           or  encore!ihnp4
           To send a message to me use "vaxine!rch"
       3.  The rest of the message can be any legal FidoNet message.
       4.  When a message meeting these requirements gets to the
           gateway, it is converted to UN*X format and sent to the
           host named 'vaxine'.  This UN*X host then sends the mail
           to the address given in the first line of the message.

       Sending UN*X to Fido:

       1.  Send UN*X mail to either
               decvax!encore!vaxine!spark!net!node!username
           or  ihnp4!encore!vaxine!spark!net!node!username
           where net is the FidoNet net number, node is the FidoNet
           node number, and username is the name of the person to
           receive the message with all spaces changed to the
           underscore (_) character.  The name cannot have any
           quote marks or other punctuation characters in it except
           for the underscore character!  If it does contain any
           punctuation marks, then a UN*X mailer somewhere will not
           properly process the mail and it will get returned as
           undeliverable.
       2.  When this message reaches the host 'vaxine', it is sent
           through a special mail processor that routes it to the
           gateway using Kermit.
       3.  Once it is received at the gateway, it is processed and
           changed into FidoNet mail to the appropriate person at
           the given Fido node.

       This gateway has been tested, but if you try it and notice







FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:37           Page 6

       something that seems to be wrong, please let me know so that
       I can try to fix it.

       ------------------------------------------------------------




























































FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:37           Page 7


                        The aliens are coming!
                        The aliens are coming!

                            by Dave Barry


       I  don't  want  to  alarm  anybody,  but  there  is  an
       excellent  chance  that  the Earth will be destroyed in
       the next  several  days.  Congress  is  thinking  about
       eliminating  a  federal  program under which scientists
       broadcast signals to alien  beings.  This  would  be  a
       large  mistake.  Alien beings have atomic blaster death
       cannons.  You cannot cut off their federal programs  as
       if they were merely poor people.

       I realize some of you may not believe that alien beings
       exist.   But   how   else  can  you  explain  the  many
       unexplained phenomena that people are always  sighting,
       such  as lightning and flying saucers?  Oh,  I know the
       authorities claim these sightings are  actually  caused
       by  "weather  balloons," but that is a bucket of manure
       if I ever heard one.  (That's just a figure of  speech,
       of course.  I realize manure is silent.)

       Answer  this  question honestly:  Have you,  or has any
       member of your immediate family,  ever seen  a  weather
       balloon?  Of  course  not.  Nobody  has.  Yet  if these
       "authorities" were telling the truth,  the  skies  over
       America   would   be   dark   with   weather  balloons.
       Commercial aviation would be impossible.  Nevertheless,
       the authorities trot out this tired old explanation, or
       an even stupider one,  every time a  flying  saucer  is
       sighted.

       Wake  up,  America!  There  are  no  weather  balloons!
       Those are alien beings!  They are all  around  us!  I'm
       sure  most of you have seen the movie "E.T.," the story
       of an alien who almost dies  when  he  falls  into  the
       clutches  of  the American medical establishment but is
       saved by pre-adolescent boys.  Everybody  believes  the
       alien  is  a  fake,  a triumph of special effects.  But
       watch the movie closely next time.  The alien is  real.
       The  boys  are  fakes.  Real  pre-adolescent boys would
       have beaten the alien to death with rocks.

       Yes,  aliens exist.  And high government officials know
       they exist, but they've been keeping this knowledge top
       secret.  Here is the Untold Story:

       Years  ago,  when  the  alien-broadcast  program began,
       government scientists decided to  broadcast  a  message
       that  would  be  simple  yet  convey  a  sense of love,
       universal peace and brotherhood:  "Have  a  Nice  Day."
       They  broadcast  this message over and over,  day after
       day, year after year, until one day they got an answer:








FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:39           Page 8

              Dear Earth Persons:
                OK.  We are having a nice day.  We also have a
              number  of extremely sophisticated weapons,  and
              unless you  start  broadcasting  something  more
              interesting,  we  will  reduce  your planet to a
              very warm object the size of a  child's  bowling
              ball.

                                            Regards,
                                            The Aliens


       So  the scientists,  desperate for something that would
       interest the aliens,  broadcast an episode of  "I  Love
       Lucy,"  and  the  aliens loved it.  They demanded more,
       and soon they were getting all  three  major  networks,
       and  the  earth  was saved.  There is only one problem:
       The aliens have terrible taste.  They love game  shows,
       soap  operas,  Howard  Cosell  and "Dallas." Whenever a
       network tries to take one of these shows off  the  air,
       the aliens threaten to vaporize the planet.

       This  is  why you and all your friends think television
       is so awful.  It isn't designed to please  you  -  it's
       designed  to please creatures from another galaxy.  You
       know the Wisk commercial,  the one with ring around the
       collar,  the  one so spectacularly stupid that it makes
       you wonder  why  anybody  would  dream  of  buying  the
       product?  Well,  the  aliens  love that commercial.  We
       all owe a great debt of gratitude  to  the  people  who
       make  Wisk.  The  have not sold a single bottle of Wisk
       in 14 years, but they have saved the Earth.

       Very few people know any  of  this.  Needless  to  say,
       Congress   has   no   idea  what  is  going  on.   Most
       legislators are incapable of eating  breakfast  without
       the help of several aides, so we can hardly expect them
       to  understand  a serious threat from outer space.  But
       if they go ahead with their plan to cancel  the  alien-
       broadcast  program and the aliens miss the next episode
       of "General Hospital," what do you think  will  happen?
       Think about it.  And have a nice day.



          Submitted by Rob Rothberg, Sysop of Digital Bitch.


       ------------------------------------------------------------















FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:41           Page 9



                           A new Fido Network
                             by Bob Hartman
                    Sysop 132/101 (formerly 101/101)


               As of Friday, September 20th, the UN*X Gateway
       Fido, and several others in New Hampshire have formed a
       new Fido network - NH_Net.  The affected boards are:

       UN*X Gateway   was Fido 101/101 now is Fido 132/101 or 132/0
       cLINE          was Fido 101/102 now is Fido 132/102
       M'Cycle Bytes  was Fido 101/107 now is Fido 132/107
       Revap Data     was Fido 101/388 now is Fido 132/388
       North Net      was Fido 101/444 now is Fido 132/444
       Alter-Net      was Fido 101/644 now is Fido 132/644
       Wizards Castle was Fido  16/615 now is Fido 132/615
       Spaghetti_heav was Fido  16/620 now is Fido 132/620

               Please use the new node numbers whenever you send
       mail.  Since the UN*X Gateway receives *LOTS* of mail, it
       should now be addressed to the new node number (132/101).
       Also, Rovermsg, Renum, and Filedate bugs should now be
       mailed to 132/101.  Thanks from all the nodes in net 132!

       ------------------------------------------------------------





































FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:42           Page 10


                          A Bit of Clarification

                               Kurt Reisler

                        SYSOP FIDO 109/74 & 109/483

               In an article excerpted from the August 1985 issue
       of DIGITAL REVIEW (it was reprinted with permission wasn't
       it?), was a discussion fo the FIDO sessions presented at the
       Fall 84 and Spring 85 DECUS Symposia.  As the speaker at
       those sessions, I felt that a misconception expressed in
       that article should be cleared up.

               The first FIDO session was presented at the Fall
       1985 DECUS, which was held in Anaheim, CA.  The session was
       actually a Birds of a Feather (BOF) session, which was
       scheduled at the symposium.  I had not been involved with
       FIDO long enough to get together an abstract for a formal
       session in time to meet the submission deadlines.  The room
       it was held in was the same size room that all BOF sessions
       are held in.  It would seat 50 people and was to be an hour
       long.  Well, we had nearly 100 people in the room, with more
       in the hall outside.  The session went to 1.5 hours before
       we were thrown out by the next BOF session.  All in all a
       very good session, with several FIDO systems spawned as a
       result.

               The second FIDO session was presented at the Spring
       1985 DECUS which was held in New Orleans, LA.  This one was
       a formal session of an hours duration.  Unfortunately, it
       was scheduled immediately before an award ceremony that I
       was supposed to be at, so the session was not able to run
       over the alotted hour, and I was not able to field all of
       the questions that I would have liked to.  Had about 150 in
       attendance.

               A third FIDO session is going to be held at the
       upcoming DECUS which is being held in early December at the
       Disneyland Hotel in Anaheim.  This session is to be 1.5
       hours.  Hopefully there will be enough time to handle all
       the questions.  In addition, Tom Jennings (anyone know who
       he is?) is scheduled to do a "Pre-Symposium Seminar" before
       the start of the actual symposium.

               All in all, I would say that both DEC and DECUS have
       been very, very good to us.  Also, I have never considered
       myself to be a "spokesman" for FIDO, I just happen to like
       to talk.















FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:44           Page 11

       ============================================================
                              COLUMNS
       ============================================================
         A long time ago... on a node far, far away (from PDPvax)

                          XXXXX   XXXXXX   XXXX
                          X    X  X       X    X
                          X    X  XXXXX   X
                          X    X  X       X
                          X    X  X       X    X
                          XXXXX   XXXXXX   XXXX

                      X    X    XX    XXXXX    XXXX
                      X    X   X  X   X    X  X
                      X    X  X    X  X    X   XXXX
                      X XX X  XXXXXX  XXXXX        X
                      XX  XX  X    X  X   X   X    X
                      X    X  X    X  X    X   XXXX


       The further adventures of Luke Vaxhacker         Episode n+1

           The story thus far: Luke, PDP-1, and their 'droids RS232
       and  3CPU  have made good their escape from the Imperial Bus
       Signals with the aid of Con Solo and the bookie,  Two Bacco.
       The  Milliamp  Falcon  hurtles  onward through system space.
       Meanwhile, on a distant page in user space...

           Princess _LPA0:  was ushered into the  conference  room,
       followed  closely  by  Dec  Vadic.  "Governor Tarchive," she
       spat,  "I should have expected to find you  holding  Vadic's
       lead.  I  recognized  your  unique  pattern when I was first
       brought aboard." She eyed the 0177545 tatooed on his  header
       coldly.

           "Charming  to  the  last," Tarchive declared menacingly.
       "Vadic, have you retrieved any information?"

           "Her resistance to the  logic  probe  is  considerable,"
       Vadic  rasped.  "Perhaps  we  would get faster results if we
       increased the supply voltage..."

           "You've  had your chance,  Vadic".  Now I would like the
       princess to witness the test that will make this workstation
       fully operational.  Today we enable the -r beam option,  and
       we've  chosen  the  princess'  $HOME of /usr/alderaan as the
       primary target."

           "No!  You can't! /usr/alderaan is a public account, with
       no restricted permissions.  We have  no  backup  tapes!  You
       can't..."

           "Then name the rebel inode!" Tarchive snapped.

           A  voice  announced  over a hidden speaker that they had
       arrived in /usr.








FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:46           Page 12

           "1248,"  she  whispered,  "They're  on  /dev/rm3.  Inode
       1248." She turned away.

           Tarchive sighed with satisfaction.  "There, you see Lord
       Vadic?  She can be reasonable. Proceed with the operation."

           It took several clock cycles for the words to penetrate.
       "What!" _LPA0: gasped.

           "/dev/rm3  is  not  a  mounted   filesystem."   Tarchive
       explained.   "We   require   a   more   visible  subject  to
       demonstrate the power of the RM STAR  workstation.  We  will
       mount an attack on /mnt/dantooine as soon as possible."

           As the princess watched, Tarchive reached over and typed
       "ls"  on a nearby terminal.  There was a brief pause,  there
       being only  one  processor  on  board,  and  the  viewscreen
       showed, ".: not found."

           The princess suddenly double-spaced and went off-line.

       To be continued...










































FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:46           Page 13

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                                   ROBOT

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                            The Interrupt Stack


       27 Oct 1985
          2 AM - Change from Daylight Savings Time to Standard
          time.  You should change your system clock before mail
          hour this date.

       27 Nov 1985
          Halley's Comet passes closest to Earth before perihelion.

       24 Jan 1986
          Voyager 2 passes Uranus.

        9 Feb 1986
          Halley's Comet reaches perihelion.

       11 Apr 1986
          Halley's Comet reaches perigee.

       19 May 1986
          Steve Lemke's next birthday.







FIDONEWS     --           30 Sep 85  03:02:48           Page 14


       24 Aug 1989
          Voyager 2 passes Neptune.





       If you have something which you would like to see on this
       calendar, please send a message to Fido 107/7.