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Released By
The Office Of The High Preest Of MOO
Floyd Gecko
Number Three in a series of confusing and/or enlightening releases of one
thing or another from that High Preest guy, who co-ordinates this carp.
Special thanks to the Ministry Of Fish.
In MOOism, there is no such thing as Misty-Sizzle in the ordinary sense
of the unword. You know, KOäMOâENEäIä and éEOèANH and all the other
miscellaneous accoutrements that give religion meaning. MOOism is a
Metagnostic Agnostic Anti-Church, in a sense (of which we all have five, this
being only one). As Metagnostics,we believe in whatever comes to mind. As
Agnostics, we don't even trust that. As an Anti-Church (see MOO-COW â-6) we
don't so much believe in things as suspend our disbelief. Willing suspension
of disbelief is the key to MOOist MystiSchism.
In fact, this is the basic reason we renamed it such: the whole point of
what we're doing here is to break the mental world apart into its component
parts and shuffle them around. Without this kind of shuffling in the head,
successful combinations can't be found. By the Holy Rite of Schism, we
promote divergence, and then later on, Conjugation, of Sects.
In terms of the evolution of mind, MOOism the the first Sectually
Reproducing Organism in history.
And that's the trick... Before this century, we were in the middle of
intellectual Dead Airedale: the process which happens when the mind decomposes
from a functioning complex entity into a whole bunch of undifferentiated
cells. Old Churches, with
monolithic Dogma (the Dead Airedale I mentioned) were like fungi:
undifferentiated cells. In a mushroom, all the cells are the same,except for
the spores. In a mush-brained Church, all the believers have the same
beliefs, except for the clergy, so the transmission of new ideas drops to zero
(Dead Air).
Now there are certain things that seem obvious to me,
Mystically Speaking <tm>, but they may not seem obvious to other people. Like
the fact that it's inevitable that self-expansive patterns like intelligence
and life will eventually reach a point at which that information can be stored
in "DreamTime", the pre-dimensional, non-local part of spacetime that's
everywhere and everywhen at once. That's a thing that sort of leaps out at
me. But maybe not so to you, and even though I'm right, and you're wrong, that
doesn't make your concepts any less valid. That's the Metagnostic Influence...
We all live in every possible reality that accounts for what's going on
vis-a-vis our inputs, like the senses, what happens in the mind. Now, since
you're reading something that I've written (that's a good bet, anyway), you
must have some overlap with where YOUR mind lives and where MY mind lives.
With pretty-damn-close certainty, some of where you live must follow my
beliefs, but then,a whole heap of it probably doesn't. Whatever you believe
is partly true.
By willing suspension of disbelief, Anti-Doubt, you allow yourself to
explore bits of where you are that you hadn't thought of before. Since part
of your reality lives there, those ideas will almost certainly be useful, and
they definitely can't hurt. So run with it. Whatever occurs to you that MIGHT
be true,
certainly IS true in some reality, linked to the one you think you're in by
the mere fact that it LOOKS the same.
Of course, you don't have to believe this. You can believe whatever you
want, and MOOism will sit there and nod its fool head,grin its fool grin, and
make stupid comments about it.
PART SIX
So let's do an exercise in MOOish MystiSchism. For the moment, let's
discard the MOOist attitude, and masquerade it as "Legitimate" Mysticism,
like, as in, Cosmogeny instead of
Cosmopolitan, Eschatology instead of S-Scatology, and so forth. Dumping the
dumb-fool sarcasm that we keep up just to remind you that we're Metagnostic
Agnostics. Here she lies:
Part Q: The Book Of Nothing In Particular
1) Before the beginning there wasn't nothing. Without comparison,there could
be no nothing. The non-nothing was everything and nothing at the same time,
because nobody was there to tell it what it couldn't do. But everything
without distinction is just more nothing. And so there wasn't nothing, but
everything was.
2) After the end, there won't be nothing, for just the same reasons.
3) Between the middle, there remains no nothing, because the gaps have all
been filled in by emptiness, which is Something, even if not very much. And
so as it was in the beginning, and as it will be after the end, so it is now,
between the middle and itself. 4) Everything is held back only by its
overwhelming tendency not to exist HERE, and NOW, because of the inconceivable
smallness of HERE and NOW when compared with everything. And the everything
was separated into Information, which was the pattern of the non-nothing.
5) With the discrimination of Information, there became division,and
separation, and this is why not Everything exists for us,because Information
separates the True from the False.
6) Inside the non-nothing which is Everything, True and False were separated
from each other in Every possible way, because it was Everything, and so
things came to be, as we see around us today,and also as we don't, but not
HERE and NOW.
7) So finally there was Something, which came from Information,which came
from Everything, and Everything was not-Nothing.
8) But where there was Something to compare it with, the not-Nothing was less
than Something, and was called Nothing. So from the not-nothing which was
Everything comes Something and Nothing,created together everywhere, at all
times.
9) Something and Nothing exist Sometimes in Balance and Sometimes
Not-In-Balance, but almost always there is more Nothing than Something,
because almost always there is only One Thing HERE and NOW. And the One
Things are separated by Information which is a great deal of Nothing.
10) So it is that Nothing separates us from each other, since it is here in
great abundance, and the only Something that exists exists in the form of One
Things or Sometimes Nothing at all. 11) But Information is the Nothing that
separates us, and also what makes us what we are, and so at Some HEREs and
NOWs, we are not, but at others we are, and in Some of those HEREs and NOWs
the Information that we are, in other places, exists.
12) So it is that after we die, we are dead, but remembered, and in some
places, we are known, but aren't standing, because there is less Nothing
separating us from those Somewheres than from the others, and we are closer to
them.
PART FIVE
As you can see, this makes almost no sense at all. This is,in many ways,
a lot like Real Life, and MOOism in general. Of course, it has a lot more
explanations than Real Life, and it doesn't seem to contradict itself as much
as MOOism in general, but that's what makes it MystiSchism.
Obviously, MOOism is everywhere, sort of like the not-Nothing in the Book
of Nothing In Particular. Because everyone believes what they do, or else
they don't, and everyone follows their beliefs, or else they don't, which is
the credo of any Metagnostic Agnostic Anti-Church: Do What Thou Wilt Shall Be
The Whole of The Law, Unless Thou Wilt Not Follow The Law.
Everyone is a Pope of their own Sect of Metagnostic Agnotisc MystiSchism:
they do what they like, unless they don't want to. They choose to behave the
way they do, unless someone or something else chooses for them. Whatever they
do, it's the Holy Dogma of MOO that they MUST do it, unless they feel like
breaking Holy Dogma, which is also okay.
So don't worry about converting them to your own Sect of MOO,
