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| #Post#: 81573-------------------------------------------------- | |
| what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: vintagegal Date: October 1, 2024, 9:19 am | |
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| I have upwards of 5 (step)grandkids through my late husband. As | |
| they are mostly all teens, I have been sending them checks for | |
| birthdays and Christmas. Sometimes I get a thank you, sometimes | |
| not. I always intended to stop when they reached 18. The oldest | |
| one did reach 18, sent a check, no acknowledgement, although I | |
| did previously get a TY for a (much more generous) check for | |
| their HS graduation. There are two in this branch of the family, | |
| the younger one never acknowledges a gift. So with Christmas | |
| coming up, would you send both checks, or only one for the | |
| younger one, or none? I am leaning toward none. | |
| Another branch has one kid, never acknowledges gifts, will | |
| graduate next year. I am thinking of doing only the grad gift. | |
| As background, we live about 175 miles apart, they make no | |
| effort to keep in touch. | |
| #Post#: 81574-------------------------------------------------- | |
| Re: what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: lowspark Date: October 1, 2024, 11:11 am | |
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| None. | |
| For any of them. | |
| This says it all: | |
| [quote author=vintagegal link=topic=2614.msg81573#msg81573 | |
| date=1727792364] | |
| As background, we live about 175 miles apart, they make no | |
| effort to keep in touch. | |
| [/quote] | |
| #Post#: 81578-------------------------------------------------- | |
| Re: what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: jpcher Date: October 1, 2024, 2:57 pm | |
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| I agree with stopping all checks. See how long it takes them to | |
| contact you to see if you're all right. | |
| Do thier parents keep in touch with you? | |
| #Post#: 81579-------------------------------------------------- | |
| Re: what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: vintagegal Date: October 1, 2024, 4:49 pm | |
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| very rarely. | |
| #Post#: 81580-------------------------------------------------- | |
| Re: what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: sandisadie Date: October 1, 2024, 5:55 pm | |
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| I agree, somewhat, to not sending checks from now on. Maybe, if | |
| any of them are still not 12 or 13 then a small check might be | |
| ok because you have been sending the older ones a money gift in | |
| the past. | |
| #Post#: 81581-------------------------------------------------- | |
| Re: what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: Rose Red Date: October 2, 2024, 5:55 am | |
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| Send a card if you wish but no more checks. Very rude they don't | |
| thank you even by text. That says they don't want that kind of | |
| relationship so give them their wish. | |
| #Post#: 81583-------------------------------------------------- | |
| Re: what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: Starry Diadem Date: October 3, 2024, 1:47 am | |
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| I wouldn�t go beyond birthday cards, and a family card at | |
| Christmas. The most I might do to preserve the relationship - | |
| and only after thinking through whether that was worth the | |
| effort - is send a small family Christmas gift for parents and | |
| grandchildren alike. Some mildly luxurious food item (posh | |
| chocolate or biscuits/cookies), for example. | |
| #Post#: 81610-------------------------------------------------- | |
| Re: what would you do? (gifts) | |
| By: vintagegal Date: October 29, 2024, 7:37 am | |
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| I've pretty much decided, family gift (local food specialty) for | |
| the family that sends me cookies. Cards for the other two | |
| families. No more checks until graduation. | |
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