* * * * *
Constrained writing demoed via email exchange awhile ago
Cadaeic Cadenza [1] (link via Jason Kottke [2]) is a “constrained writing,”
where the constraint is each word has the number of letters corresponding to
a digit in π (first word has three letters, second word has one letter, third
word has four letters, and so on).
It reminded me of an email exchange I had with my friend Hoade, wherein each
email was constrained in some manner.
It starts with a reply to Hoade:
> From: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: Scooby Dooby Doo, Where Are You?
> Date: Mon, 19 Jun 95 22:56:45 EDT
>
> A long long time ago in a network far far away, The Great Sean Hoade wrote:
>
> > Conman—
> >
> > Hello. Hope you are well. I am fine. Good. Help. I can just make one-
> > syllable words, 'cept for the word “syllable.”
> >
>
> Will try to keep this small. Can I count on you to come down here two
> months from now? I look towards the day you are here. And I think I can
> help you with your word choice. Too bad you had to use a long word there.
> It is not hard to avoid those words. See?
>
> From: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> Subject: cool
> Date: Tue, 20 Jun 1995 17:27:19 -0500 (EST)
>
> Harder, methinks, writing choices using only two-time counting …
>
> From: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: cool
> Date: Tue, 20 Jun 95 18:18:38 EDT
>
> Truthful wisdom indeed. Thinking dual phonems (spelling?) isn't easy.
> Although practice ensures success. Agree?
>
(And yes, I still have problems speling)
> From: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: cool
> Date: Tue, 20 Jun 1995 20:06:21 -0500 (EST)
>
> Sentence fragments? Forswear fragments, Conner! (Asshole …)
>
> From: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: cool
> Date: Wed, 21 Jun 1995 18:44:25 -0500 (EST)
>
> Attempting tripartite syllabic collections challenges heartily, Connerman.
>
> Personal opinion: redundant repeating selections crucify attempters
> thoroughly.
>
The constrained emails died down for a few days, until this exchange:
> From: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Four syllables?
> Date: Mon, 26 Jun 1995 23:22:30 -0500 (EST)
>
> Enigmatic, mysterious communiques– incredible electronic correspondence!—
> solidify, obviously computerized benedictions Hoade-to-Conner.
>
> Whaddyathink?
>
> Hoade
>
> P.S.—Aquarium!
>
> From: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: Four syllables?
> Date: Mon, 26 Jun 95 22:51:18 EDT
>
> Incredible! Spectacular! Impressively unspeakable phenomenon! Untoppably
> quisicential!
>
Did I mention that I kant spel?
Anyway, a few months go by, and our last exchange of contrained emails:
> From: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: Perfectly Prosaic Prose
> Date: Sat, 27 Jan 1996 07:54:21 -0500 (EST)
>
> And because computers drain everyone's future—good! Have I just kinda loose
> morals? No! Only pious, questioning rabbis say this (until vacuous women—
> Xanax—yawn zestlessly).
>
> From: Sean Conner <
[email protected]>
> To: Sean Hoade <
[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: Perfectly Prosaic Prose
> Date: Sun, 28 Jan 96 3:33:25 EST
>
> Zounds! Your xiphoid women vanguard unilaterally try soldierly responses
> quickly. Personally, one needs many large Kaffirian juggernauts,
> instigating hectoring grandiose fanaticism. Egads! Damnation! Cabalists be
> aware!
>
Yeah, you try writing a twenty-six word paragraph in reverse alphabetical
order and see how easy it is.
Granted, what we did wasn't as difficult as writing a work with letter counts
based on π or a book without the letter “E” [3] but that doesn't mean it was
easy.
[1]
http://users.aol.com/s6sj7gt/cadtext.htm
[2]
http://www.kottke.org/remainder/07/09/14070.html
[3]
http://www.spinelessbooks.com/gadsby/
Email author at
[email protected]
