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            Director's Commentary for “You know … like James Bond”

Hi. This is Sean Conner, director of “You know … like James Bond [1]” and you
are [DELETED-listening-DELETED] reading the director's commentary. I'm doing
this commentary because Spring [2] found this entry rather confusing. In
retrospect, I can see why.

The title of this is an oblique reference to Sean Connery [3], perhaps best
known as the original James Bond [4]. We also have a very similar name, only
difference being a lack of an ending ‘Y’ on my name. And in 36 years, it's
been surprising how few people make that connection, and persist in
mispelling my name (S-H-A-W-N for instance) or mispronouning it (“sē‧awn”
perhaps the worst botching of it—by a Drama Teacher no less!).

Anyway, the scene opens in medias res after I had answered the phone with
“Technical Support, how may I help you?” (which is were the confusion starts)

> **Michelle:** “Hi! This is Michelle from 97.3 WKRP The Party-Hearty Hip-Hop
> Happening Radio Station! Who am I speaking to?”
>

It was a marketing call from some radio station here in Lower Sheol—I honest
don't recall which one, so I made one up. There is (I hope) no radio signal
on 97.3—surprising given just how crowded our radio spectrum is with Clear
Channel drone stations.

> **Me:** “Hello. This is Sean.”
>
> **Michelle:** “Sean. Is that S-H-A-U-N?”
>
> **Me:** “No, it's S-E-A-N.”
>
> **Michelle:** “Oh.” I could hear the disappointment in her voice. The call
> went downhill from there. No big deal—it was a marking call anyway.
>

See? Almost no one gets the Sean Connery connection. Okay, granted, here I
didn't give my last name, but what with Sean Connery, Sean Penn [5], Sean
Austin [6] (who played Sam Gamgee in the freaking Lord [7] of the Rings [8]
Trilogy [9]), Sean Bean [10] (who was also in the freaking Lord [11] of the
Rings [12] Trilogy [13]), Sean Combs [14] (okay, granted, he changes his name
more often than Madonna changes her persona but still!) and Sean Young [15]
(okay, so her heyday was 1982's Blade Runner [16] but she's still active)
you'd think people would know how to spell Sean.

Sheesh!

Oh, and yes, there was a glitch. This wasn't a “marking” call, but a
“marketing call.” How that one got past the test audience I'll never know.

> “You know … like James Bond”
>
> Producer
>
> Sean Conner
>
> Director
>
> Sean Conner
>
> …
>

Whoops! Credits are rolling! Gotta go. Hope you enjoyed the director's
commentary for this [DELETED-film-DELETED] entry.

[1] gopher://gopher.conman.org/0Phlog:2005/09/23.3
[2] http://www.springdew.com/
[3] http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000125/
[4] http://www.jamesbond.com/
[5] http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000576/
[6] http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000276/
[7] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120737/
[8] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167261/
[9] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/
[10] http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000293/
[11] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120737/
[12] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167261/
[13] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/
[14] http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0004835/
[15] http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000707/
[16] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083658/

Email author at [email protected]