* * * * *

                              Christmas shopping

Mark [1] and JeffK invited me to go with them on some last minute Christmas
shopping at Sawgrass Mills [2]. Sawgrass Mills is the largest outlet mall in
South Florida, and it may very well me the largest one in the US (United
States)—two miles of stores. It's been a few years since I last went and if
anything, it's larger than the last time I visited it.

[Huge TVs for Consumer Propaganda I] [3] (Huge TVs for Consumer Propaganda I)
[4] [Huge TVs for Consumer Propaganda II] [5] (Huge TVs for Consumer
Propaganda II) [6] What struck me the most about the mall were the ever
pervasive television sets hanging from the ceiling. Huge sets blaring
commercials. It's a trend I've noticed over the past few years as more and
more commercial locations have television sets for your viewing pleasure.
Mostly I've noticed it in restaurants (even fast foor places like McDonalds
[7] and Burger King [8]) and it's a trend that I don't really care for; if I
want to watch TV (Television) I'll watch it at home, I don't need to go out
and watch it.

[Lost in the Stacks] [9] (Lost in the Stacks) [10]

It's amazing how big some of the stores are. Also amazing is the stuff being
sold nowadays. One store dedicated to nothing but items advertised via
infomercials (As Seen on TV!) [11] at 3:00 am on most cable channels
(although we did not see any Flowbees [12] which was a disappointment).
Foreign soldiers (If American solders are G.I.s, then what are foreign
solders?) [13]. Sumo wrestlers. (For all your sumo wrestling fantasies) [14]
Baby dolls in car seats (Baby dolls in car seats. You have got to be kidding
.. ) [15] (since you know, it's now illegal to have a baby in a car without
a baby seat). [More of a James Green than a James Brown] [16] One amusing
item was a plastic statue of James Brown [17], perhaps 12″ tall; press a
button and he starts moving around singing “I feel good!” although he doesn't
look all that good—he's more of a James Green than a James Brown.

In one toy store, JeffK had hidden a toy he wanted for his niece on a
previous trip, due to the long lines he figured it would be best to hide the
toy and retrieve it at a later date. Since we arrived at the mall about an
hour before closing the crowds weren't that bad and the lines, if any, where
short. So JeffK took advantage of this opportunity to retrieve the gift.
Although because of the lack of crowds, we did have to fend off people
manning the kiosks trying to offer us samples of their wares. Not even lack
of eye contact was enough to signal our disinterest in their sales pitches
and we had to continuously state “No thank you” time and time again.

[Think you can escape the Mall?] [18] (Think you can escape the Mall?) [19]

We finally found an exit near a Disney Store [20]. Standing nearby was a
security guard looking particularly bored so as we passed, I took pictures of
the display window (Massive Disney Copyright Violations!) [21], saying
“Copyright violation!” loud enough for the guard to hear each time I took a
picture.

He didn't seem to care.

[1] http://www.conman.org/people/myg/
[2] http://www.sawgrassmillsmall.com/
[3] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/tv1.thumb.jpg
[4] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/tv1.jpg
[5] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/tv2.thumb.jpg
[6] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/tv2.jpg
[7] http://www.mcdonalds.com/
[8] http://www.burgerking.com/
[9] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/bookstore.thumb.jpg
[10] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/bookstore.jpg
[11] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/seen.on.tv.jpg
[12] http://www.flowbee.com/
[13] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/soldiers.jpg
[14] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/sumo.jpg
[15] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/babies.jpg
[16] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/jgreen.jpg
[17] http://www.funky-stuff.com/
[18] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/no.exit.thumb.jpg
[19] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/no.exit.jpg
[20] http://disney.store.go.com/
[21] gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/12/16/copyright.violations.jpg

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