* * * * *
The Obligatory Episode 2 Post
Unlike in May 1999, when I saw Star Wars: The Phantom Menace [1] three times
on opening day (it just worked out that I had a chance to see it three times)
I did not see Star Wars: Attack of the Clones [2] on opening day. After the
introduction of Jar-Jar Binks, I wasn't about to see the next installment on
opening day.
[3] So I (actually, Spring [4], Rob [5] (who did see it at 12:15 am opening
day and went to see it again) and I, so make that a “we”) ended up seeing it
the day after.
The dialog sucked [6]. There was very little chemistry between Padmé (Natalie
Portman [7]) and Anakin (Hayden Christensen [8]); their love story bogged the
movie down. I found watching Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor [9]) in the rain
(what rain!) more exciting than the cold and ham-fisted romance the kids were
going through (and that's saying something since Natalie Portman is hot,
especially in the white form fitting (ahem) body suit where it was plainly
evident the set was a bit chilly). Even the scenery was more lively than
their courtship.
Oh! The scenery! It was the scenery of “The Phatom Menace” that kept me there
for two additional showings and it's only gotten better. Coruscant (the
capital planet of the Republic) is a beautiful planet filled with Gernbackian
visions of the future. Naboo, Tatooine, heck, all the planets are beautifully
rendered; Industrial Light and Magic [10] (the special effects division of
Lucasfilm) could make a killing doing travelogues.
> Sometimes, Anakin, I think you'll be the death of me.
>
Obi-Wan Kenobi, to Anakin Skywalker.
And the action sequences. The chase through Coruscant (with elements from
Blade Runner [11] and The Fifth Element [12] that either George Lucas [13]
stole or paid homage to) was phenomenal; Jedi Knights are either very brave
or very stupid (Obi-Wan Kenobi leaping through a … oh … call it the 200^th
floor window … to catch an assasin droid, or Anakin Skywalker leaping out of
a flying car (“I hate it when he does that,” says Obi-Wan) and falling … oh …
call it 2,000 feet … to catch an assasin as she tries to fly get away). Or
the sequence where Obi-Wan Kenobi attempts to capture Jango Fett (Temuera
Morrison [14]) as a maelstrom rages around them (what rain!).
And finally! We get to see True Jedi's in their prime fighting! [15] And not
just two or three—scores of Jedi Knights fighting. We get to see Mace Windu
(Samuel L. Jackson [16]—“Hand me my lightsabre—it's the one with 'bad
motherfucker' written on it.” [17]) fighting! We get to see Yoda get down
with his bad self and get dirty in a lightsabre duel that proves why he is
the master. And unlike Darth Maul (“The most underutilized character in TPM
(The Phantom Menace)), the apprentice Sith Lord to Darth Sidious in this film
will be around for the next one (woo hoo!).
[1]
http://us.imdb.com/Title?0120915
[2]
http://us.imdb.com/Title?0121765
[3]
gopher://gopher.conman.org/IPhlog:2002/05/17/clone.ticket.png
[4]
http://www.springdew.com/
[5]
http://www.tragic-smurfs.com/
[6]
http://www.salon.com/people/bc/1999/05/18/lucas/index.html
[7]
http://us.imdb.com/Name?Portman,+Natalie
[8]
http://us.imdb.com/Name?Christensen,+Hayden
[9]
http://us.imdb.com/Name?McGregor,+Ewan
[10]
http://www.ilm.com/
[11]
http://us.imdb.com/Title?0083658
[12]
http://us.imdb.com/Title?0119116
[13]
http://www.salon.com/people/bc/1999/05/18/lucas/index.html
[14]
http://us.imdb.com/Name?Morrison,+Temuera
[15]
gopher://gopher.conman.org/0Phlog:2000/09/09.1
[16]
http://us.imdb.com/Name?Jackson,+Samuel+L.
[17]
http://us.imdb.com/Quotes?0110912
Email author at
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