* * * * *
30 second commute
“You have no reason to get dressed, do you?” asked Spring [1].
“Um, no. Not really,” I said. We had gone food shopping a few days before, so
we could now eat at home instead of having to actually get dressed before
eating.
In fact, now that I think of it, I haven't actually gotten dressed in … um …
oh dear. If I have to think about it, it's been too long (how long ago did we
go grocery shopping?). I also think I'm fast appraching TMI here …
Which is one of the problems of working (or rather, slacking) at home—unless
you actually have the discipline to get dressed every day, you won't. For me,
I can roll out of bed and if I take a leasurely stroll across Condo Conner it
will take me all of 30 seconds to “commute” to my office on the other side.
Where I will plant myself in front of the computer for the next X hours
pretending to work and maybe, when I get exceedingly board, I will actually
do some work.
I suppose I could get some discipline—shower and dress before going to the
Computer Room, but if I am to do that, then why not sit in a dining room
chair for half an hour and simulate the effects of driving to work? Move my
body left and right as I take imaginary corners. Lurch forward when the
imaginary jerk in front of me stops suddenly. And randomly (roll a six sided
die and if it comes up 1) extend the “drive” by 30 minutes due to imaginary
traffic. Then I can walk the rest of the way to the Computer Room, um,
office.
Where I can have one of my computers programmed to randomly call me through
out the day, to simulate annoying cow-orkers or managers, thus breaking my
concentration. For the randomly selected meetings, I can go into the living
room and watch CSPAN for half an hour to two hours.
For lunch, I sit in the dining room chair for 15 to 20 minutes, then walk
into the kichen for food. After eating there, sit in the dining room chair
for another 15 to 20 minutes and head back into the Computer Room, um, office
for another round of random phone calls and watching CSPAN on TV.
Then, at 5:10, I can leave, sit in the dining room chair for another 30
minutes (or an hour, if I roll a 1) and arrive home. Whereby I can then walk
into the Computer Room and veg out in front of the computer.
Why are you looking at me funny?
[1]
http://www.springdew.com/
Email author at
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