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the apocrypha of cat - the desert | |
September 06th, 2019 | |
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It is said that before the desert, there was no cat. | |
It is also said that before cat, there was no desert. | |
What is known is that when cat left the desert he left a piece of | |
himself behind and took something different in its place. For | |
before the desert was a time when cat wore colors, when he sang | |
karaoke, and most importantly, when he had hair. | |
The sages speak of a time before myth and before legend when the | |
world held its breath waiting for a story to begin and set all in | |
motion. In some traditions this began with a Word, or a song that | |
can be heard in the Vedas, but the true devotee knows the truth. | |
The story began with a baby doll crying. | |
Cat found the doll at the edge of the great expanse stretching | |
endlessly beyond horizon covered in scrub brush and dust devils. | |
Low in the sky, the sun was quickly fleeing the heat of the day. | |
The baby cried once, twice, and a third time as a true harbinger. | |
In that aged voice-box a clarion rang from the heavens and opened | |
cat's eyes to Truth, such as needs capitalization and archaic | |
meter. | |
He lifted the baby in his arms with tender care and when he looked | |
down again his shoes had become Doc Martens. He knew these boots | |
were meant for walking, and that's just what he did as they | |
carried him deeper into the void. A voice then spoke, and cat knew | |
it to be his own though it carried no identifiable accent. It had | |
the cadence of an American and the diction of an Aussie but | |
scrambled deep in the bowels of bargain-bin Anime and food trucks. | |
The words themselves sounded like carnies trying their best to | |
hide their shame on a home visit for Christmas. It was glorious | |
and held the true power that can only be found in softness. | |
When cat asked the wind, "Why do I sound like this?" The wind | |
responded with a susurrus more brutal and jagged than cat's own | |
voice. In that moment the wind relented knowing that cat had | |
become as wind himself. And so he drifted forward further into the | |
desert. | |
In the desert he found many things. Boredom was chief amongst his | |
discoveries, though. His ennui bore a hole into the Earth, | |
hallowing it out and filling it with monsters and myth. It | |
expanded to the heavens and cast aliens from the sky raining down | |
across time. It filled our oceans and created Seaquest DSV, which | |
it is said nobody watched, ever. Finally his boredom brought him | |
back to the baby with it's soft coos and stuttered cries. In that | |
beatific countenance he saw the purity of purpose of the crafted | |
doll and it spoke a second Truth. Forever would he seek such | |
perfection in all things that crossed his gaze. | |
But his quest for beauty was at odds with the desert, for the only | |
beauty of the desert is in its solitude. While cat remained it | |
could never be itself. To love a thing and to crave for it such | |
beauty as he did, cat knew he had to leave. | |
And so, with the pure will of his element, he breathed outward | |
across the landscape and painted it with all his colors. The pinks | |
and fuchsias washed across the sky and land. The deep blues of his | |
eyes filled the sky. But green, which he always had avoided in his | |
youth, would not come from him. And so the desert would hold its | |
purity and its beauty for all time while cat was left with only | |
darkness to shroud himself. | |
In Doc Martens he walked forth and it is whispered that he left | |
three secrets behind in the vastness. The first was a fax number | |
of unknown purpose. The second was a horde of unused raspberry | |
pis. And the third was the greatest mix tape of all time. | |
These days cat wanders the Earth in search of beauty and truth | |
while battling those forces diametrically opposed. Chiefly among | |
these is Salesforce, which cat has made his personal dragon to | |
slay. | |
One day cat may return to the desert and teach it the secrets he | |
has learned. It is said you can find hints of these secrets buried | |
underground in the depths of his latest baby, if you know where to | |
look. | |
Remember what cat does for us each and every day and give thanks. | |
cat |