found on a hard disc backup from 1989 or so.. I probably got it a few
years before...
Rob.
TIME BEETLE
Originally by Paul Farah
Recreated from memory by Jim Frost (with modifications)
I knew it was going to be one of those days from the moment I
woke up. You see, my alarm clock was making an odd ringing noise
instead of its normal soft music. What I didn't know was just how bad
the day would be.
I left my house for work at about 8:15am, which was about
normal. I hopped into my rather antiquated VW Bug and putted along to
work. The day went smoothly enough. I only thought about how much
I hated my job for 6 hours instead of eight, since the first floor
caught fire at about 3pm and we were evacuated, allowing me to go home
two hours early.
As I drove into my driveway, things began to get weird. My VW
was parked where I always park it. The problem is, I was DRIVING my
bug. I parked beside my VW and hopped out. My curiousity was at a
dangerous level. I opened the door to the other vw, and climbed in.
Why not? It's MY car, even if my car was parked beside it. But the
dashboard was like a science fiction movie gone wild. There were
knobs, dials, and other gadgets everywhere. Completely engrossed, I
began looking around the car. Finally, I found a small booklet. I
began to read it.
Thank you for purchasing the VWT101 Time Beetle. You
have made a fine choice. The VWT101 is cabable of both
temporal and spatial displacement, using dihydrogen oxide
for fuel. Spatial movement is accomplished using normal
frictional methods. The methods used for temporal move-
ment, however, have been significantly improved since
the VW100 was introduced. Among the enhancements are ....
>From there on in, it got too technical for me, and I skipped over to
the section entitled "simple operating instructions".
To undergo temporal movement, you should first fasten
your seatbelt.
Sure, everyone knows that. Bumpy stuff, time traveling.
Then, set your intended temporal destination using the
panel marked "temporal destination."
I looked around. Yup, there it was. Right about where the radio
should be. I wondered where the radio was, but never did find it.
Temporal displacement is measured using the normal
calendar, although this is not accurate for all time
frames. When setting the day, the display will auto-
matically skip those periods which cannot be reached
(such as September 3 through 13, 1752). When the
temporal destination has been set, start the VWT101
and push the button marked "displace." The time spent
in travel is proportional to the length of the dis-
placement, but should not last more than a few seconds
for jumps of up to a million years.
For additional information on temporal displacement,
please see "Rules and Regulations on the Use of
Temporal Vehicles", which may be obtained from any
government office or licensing bureau.
Fine. I now own a time machine. What in hell do I do with a time
machine? My mind was buzzing. Of course! Go for a trip. I wondered
how much fuel the thing had left, but finally gave up on trying to
check, since the thing used water anyway and I could probably come up
with more water if I needed it.
Where should I go? How about to my own birthday, in the year
2050? Why not. So I set the thing to November 15, 2050, and sat back
for a second before hitting the panic button.
"HEY! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?"
I nearly jumped clean out of my skin. I was looking at myself
through the window. What's more, I was screaming at myself. This was
too much. I snapped on the ignition (the thing used a key, and the
key was still there), noted that it ran about as loudly as my normal
car, and slammed it into reverse.
"Come back here!" yelled the other me. He was now behind me,
waving his arms and yelling frantically. Still shook up, I kept the
thing floored for about two blocks. Finally slowing down, I
remembered about the time travel part of this car. I hit the button.
Nothing happened.
Well, really lots of things happened, but the trip was wholly
uneventful. No noise. No flashy lights. Nothing. Disappointing,
after all the movies I'd seen.
The scenery was much more interesting. In an instant, the
road had been transformed into a parking lot. There were tall
buildings all around me. Directly in front of me was a lot with a
dirty sign, which read "used cars."
I climbed out of my car and began looking around. The general
state of things was disarray. There weren't a lot of people around,
and they all ignored me. They weren't dressed particularly strangely,
though this one girls had a suit with a hole.... Hmm. Have to go out
with her someday.
Unimpressed with the future, I hopped back in the car. I
reset the temporal thingy to 5pm the day I had left, and hit the
button. Things looked normal once again. I drove back to my house
and pulled into the driveway. There were no cars here. Becoming
distressed, I got out and began looking around. As I walked around
the garage, I heard a car drive up. Not thinking anything of it, I
kept looking around. Everything looked all right. I came around the
garage and saw two VW's. Someone was in my VW! I ran up to the
window and screamed, "HEY! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?" Then I
noticed that I was in the car. The me in the car looked very
startled, quickly started the car, and took off down the street. I
tried telling myself to stop the car, but it was no use. Upset, I
turned around and saw myself.
This was getting to be too much. "Are you me?" I asked.
"Yes," I replied. "What is going on?" I asked. "I'm not quite sure
myself," was my response. I was very confused at this point, and the
world began to spin. Things went black.
I woke up inside the garage. About an hour had passed. I
opened the door and looked out. Two VW's were parked there. After
looking inside, I figured out which one was the time travelling
beetle. I climbed in again, drove around the corner, and sat for a
minute to think. This all made no sense. Where did the car come
from? Since no answers came to mind, I dropped the question. I was
hungry now. Supper would have been at about 5:30. Suddenly, a bright
idea hit me. I set the temporal displacement gauge for 5:30, and
pushed the button. The I got out of the car and walked home. I have
no I dea why I didn't drive home (or even why I drove around the
corner in the first place). Walking up to the house, I saw two VW
bugs. Someone was in one of them, and another person suddenly ran up
to it and screamed something unintelligible. The vw started up,
screeched out of the driveway, and screamed off down the street. The
person who had been screaming at the car turned around as I cam up to
him.
He was me again. "Are you me?" he asked. "Yes," I replied
to myself. "What is going on?" he asked. "I'm not quite sure
myself," I replied. He went suddenly white and passed out.
I dragged myself into the garage. Then I left, walking around
the corner to where I'd left the car. I drove the car back, put it in
the driveway next to the other car, and went inside to eat. I really
was hungry. A little while later, I heard a car start up. Busy
eating, I neglected to look outside. I didn't want to know if I'd be
out there. When I got up the next morning, only my normal car was
parked in the driveway.
I guessed that it had all been a dream. I jumped into my car
and drove off to work. But I had work off -- the building had been
cordoned off. It seems there had been a fire....
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
- Jim Frost * The Madd Hacker -
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[email protected]
CSNET: madd%bucsb@bu-cs | BITNET: cscc71c@bostonu
-------------------------------+---+------------------------------------
"Oh beer, oh beer." -- Me | [=(BEER) <- Bud the Beer (cheers!)
