SUBJECT: RUSSIANS CATCHING UP IN UFO JOURNALISM              FILE: UFO1513





                       Russians catch up in Journalism
                  by Jim Wright for the Dallas Morning News
                             of October 15, 1989

  That old-time secular  religion,  Marxism,  seems  to  be going out of
  style everywhere except faculty lounges of American colleges.  A major
  result of this rightist deviationism  is that the Russians are at last
  getting to enjoy some of the blessings of a free press.   Such as, for
  instance, the recent news stories about aliens and monsters from outer
  space landing in Voronezh.

  It is without  any doubt a refreshing change for those folks, who have
  more than enough trouble during  this  century from monsters grown
  locally.

  Presumably, it is  Halloween season in Russia, too,  and  there  could
  hardly be a  more  appropriate  way  to  celebrate  it  in  the age of
  Glasnost than with  an intergalactic  trick-or-treat  right  there  in
  person (or whatever) on Soviet soil.

  What's more, there is always a chance that tourism will  benefit  from
  the new Soviet  policy  of letting it all hang out, so far as creature
  sightings are concerned.  There are  large  numbers of people in every
  land who badly waant to believe in this sort of thing, as the American
  echoes of the  latest  space-beachhead landing indicate.   People  who
  enjoy thinking about  little  green  beings  who fly around in glowing
  disks probably could  be  talked  into  spending  their  vacations  in
  Voronezh.  And Mother Russia can use the hard currency.

  That being so, it hardly matters that the eyewitnesses  turn out to be
  children.  No doubt  the  Russians have noticed that Scotland, another
  country that can use hard currency  (or  soft or in-between), has done
  very well with the Loch Ness monster.  And Nessie usually  is  sighted
  from the window of one of the nearby public houses.  Those who want to
  believe will believe.

  Personally, as one  of the global journalism fraternity, I am proud to
  see that my brothers and sisters at  Tass,  the  Soviet  news service,
  have taken a throroughly professional attitude toward  all  the  hoots
  and jeers at  their  dispateches about the latest historic event.  Not
  only are they standing by the story,  but they have found a policeman,
  Lt. Sergei A. Matveyev, to corroborate the kids' story.

  This is in keeping with standard operating procedures used in the free
  press everywhere.  The lieutenant said he was a little bit wary of the
  story himself when  he  first  got word of the landing.   And  no,  he
  didn't get there  in time to see the actual aliens themselves, but, by
  Trotsky, he did see their vehicle and  "it was certainly a body flying
  in the sky."

  Police officers do  have  a  reputation  for  being  skeptical   about
  citizens who tell    stories   that   depend   upon   extraterrestrial
  intervention to explain their - the citizens' - behavior.  That may be
  why the lawmen  are  so popular as  corroborating  witnesses  for  UFO
  journalism.  Cops have excellent credibility, spacewise.

  I'll bet Lt.  Matveyev  is  really sorry he missed seeing  the  actual
  space critters themselves; I know I am.

  According to the  kids,  the  UFO  was  a  glowing ball "of deep red."
  Naturally, it disgorged a nine-foot,  metallic-looking "humanoid," who
  checked out the scene, then went back to get a friend and their robot.
  Whereupon all three promenaded in the park, did some high-tech tricks,
  reboarded and left.

  I think, though,  before  I  book  seats on the next Voronezh UFO Site
  All-in-One-Tour, I will  have  to have  some  additional  information.
  Such as, for instance, how late the three kids were  for supper at the
  moment they spotted  the  red space ship arriving and were unavoidably
  detained by the nine-foot humanoid.

  Chamber of Commerce mad at me.  But  until  I  get  more  evidence,  I
  intend to be  guided by the logic of a salty Pfc. I  once  knew.   Our
  outfit, rummaging through  the Mojave desert in a truck convoy, passed
  a luxurious compound, built around  a  strange,  truncated  pyramid of
  sand.  On being  told  that  this  was  s settlement  of  wealthy  UFO
  worshipers and that  the  pyramid  was designed as the landing pad for
  the creatures' ship, the Pfc. just snorted.

  "Anything smart enough to build a  spaceship,"  he  observed,  "is too
  smart to pitch a liberty in this dump."

  In spite of  the  Soviets'  amazingly  rapid  progress   in   gee-whiz
  communications, I feel  that  America's  lead in this area is safe, at
  least for now.  Only yesterday,  as  I  waited  to  check  out  at the
  supermarket, the   headline  story  in  one  of  our  state-of-the-art
  publications informed me that:

                  "MAN EXPLODES AFTER EATING FIVE PIZZAS!"

            I'd like to see those Russkies top that, if they can.

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